My 9 yo was bullied online today..on a website I thought was safe

[fourcatmom]

I have been really upset about this all night and so has she. She got several random emails from I believe was the same person and s/he said some very awful things to her. I don't know what transpired between them but I have gone through all her emails and I don't see any contact between her and this person what so ever. Also, all three of the accounts that emailed her were created today as if they were created just to harass her.

 

She was told that they wished she was raped and that her body was burned. They called her idiot, whore and I can't even remember what else.

 

I guess I have been to trusting to let them be online. She is only 9 and it makes me sick that someone would say these things to her.

 

Just needed to vent. Please don't throw hate my way. I was always checking their "friends" and their messages and everything seemed rather simple and safe. It was a horse website and my daughter's both love horses.

 

this was one of the message but I warn you...it's offensive

 

I want your password you stupid wh0re. You're such a lying s! ut with too many names. Someone needs to r. ap. E you brutally and burn your ugly 11-year-old body.

 

 

 

 

 

UPDATE:

 

You guys were really helpful this morning and you fueled my fire. I contacted the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and they filed a report. I also contacted the Department of Justice and they are looking into more information and I just filed a IC3 complaint that will be forwarded to our local sheriff's department for Internet Crimes Against Children. I do know now that there were some exchanges that happened between my daughter and this person and that a moderator had warned her to be careful that she was making people mad and coming off as being bossy. I never really thought she was innocent but I know she didn't deserve the brutality of these threats. We are going to be offline (they are going to be) for a while and we are going to be having some SERIOUS discussions about behavior and the internet.

 

Thanks again for listening and supporting and directing me...I really, really appreciate it!

Edited July 20, 2011 by fourcatmom
update

[BamaTanya]

:grouphug: Oh. My. How awful for you both. Is there an authority through the website who could track the user to report this?

[Slartibartfast]

:grouphug:

 

Please report it to an administrator, they may be able to figure out the person is. :(

 

I am sorry

[fourcatmom]

We reported everything and all the accounts have been blocked but what's going to stop them from creating new accounts. And, I don't understand why? They were really abusive and I sent some emails back and they/he/she just kept right on going...both of the girls have been forbidden to go online and I guess I let them do more then I "wanted" to do but it was just this one site and mostly they were always in contact with the same girls and all of it always was appropriate.

[Bang!Zoom!]

Vent away.

 

When you are purged of the shock I'm sure the folks here will help you create a strategy for the future.

 

You must really be hurting; I know I'd feel awful.

 

I'm sorry.

 

Edit:

 

When you say reported, is that to just the horse site owner or the ISP owner?

 

You can find the ISP via the headers on the emails.

 

They absolutely will take action and end the net service of the account holder of that IP.

 

There are laws against what has happened.

 

Not "revoking service" only-I mean like people with shiny badges knocking on doors with handcuffs kind of laws.

Edited July 20, 2011 by one*mom

[Slartibartfast]

We reported everything and all the accounts have been blocked but what's going to stop them from creating new accounts. And, I don't understand why? They were really abusive and I sent some emails back and they/he/she just kept right on going...both of the girls have been forbidden to go online and I guess I let them do more then I "wanted" to do but it was just this one site and mostly they were always in contact with the same girls and all of it always was appropriate.

 

Can the admin match the IP # of the dupes to a member's account?

 

There should be an IP # check on the software

[fourcatmom]

I don't know how to go about that. They said they are dealing with it. I don''t really know what that means but I have expressed great concern and they tell me they are concerned as well. What else can I do? I guess they aren't really emails, but more messages through the website. They don't have access to personal information, as far I know.

 

 

 

Vent away.

 

When you are purged of the shock I'm sure the folks here will help you create a strategy for the future.

 

You must really be hurting; I know I'd feel awful.

 

I'm sorry.

 

Edit:

 

When you say reported, is that to just the horse site owner or the ISP owner?

 

You can find the ISP via the headers on the emails.

 

They absolutely will take action and end the net service of the account holder of that IP.

 

There are laws against what has happened.

 

Not "revoking service" only-I mean like people with shiny badges knocking on doors with handcuffs kind of laws.

[Bang!Zoom!]

Mom can sleep a little easier by using this: http://www.ipligence.com/geolocation

 

Just enter the IP address from the email header, click search. It's going to show YOURS up by default, so don't panic. Delete it in the text box, then add in the IP address from the email.

 

Click search.

 

It'll give a fairly accurate return on the location of the account which sent the offensive content.

 

You'll probably want to discuss it as a family on what to do next.

 

I'm not getting a feel of how internet/email slang savvy you are; in the event you've never even heard of a "header" in an email, here is a short guide on it.

 

If you need help with this part, yell...I'm sure you'll get answers.

 

How to read an email header is here: http://www.emailaddressmanager.com/tips/header.html

 

Edit:

 

So these were not sent directly to an email? Just rereading your line above, we are cross posting..lol...

 

Your text:

I guess they aren't really emails, but more messages through the website. They don't have access to personal information, as far I know.

 

---

 

So these are like instant messages I take it?

 

----

 

In that case the forum owner is the first responsible for shutting off/banning the IP of the offender, what follows next is hard to say.

 

Are you emailing with the forum owner?

 

How are you communicating with them?

Edited July 20, 2011 by one*mom

[fourcatmom]

It wasn't an email. It was on the website and they were messages sent through the website. So this person created three random names,

HaHaFunny,. SeriousJustice and something else...all just to contact her. These were their online user names.

 

 

 

Mom can sleep a little easier by using this: http://www.ipligence.com/geolocation

 

Just enter the IP address from the email header, click search. It's going to show YOURS up by default, so don't panic. Delete it in the text box, then add in the IP address from the email.

 

Click search.

 

It'll give a fairly accurate return on the location of the account which sent the offensive content.

 

You'll probably want to discuss it as a family on what to do next.

 

I'm not getting a feel of how internet/email slang savvy you are; in the event you've never even heard of a "header" in an email, here is a short guide on it.

 

If you need help with this part, yell...I'm sure you'll get answers.

 

How to read an email header is here: http://www.emailaddressmanager.com/tips/header.html

[fourcatmom]

So these are like instant messages I take it?

 

----

 

In that case the forum owner is the first responsible for shutting off/banning the IP of the offender, what follows next is hard to say.

 

Are you emailing with the forum owner?

 

How are you communicating with them?

 

Yes, instant messages. I contacted the mods on the site, they sanctioned their account but I don't really think that's going to do anything. They have at least three accounts so they can make more. They are not the forum owner. I sent IM through my daughter's account stating who I was and what happened. She was very understanding but I don't know what other action is going to happen. On my part, they are not going online anymore...for a long time.

[Bang!Zoom!]

The forum owner is going to sanction all activity from that IP.

 

Absolutely yes, there are ways to circumvent/change an IP. My gut feeling is that this is a 12 year old at home; but it is the WWW and you can't bank on that.

 

The account activity (all three of them most likely) is registered from a very distinct address, and it most likely will stop this cold in it's tracks..but...

 

This is one of those things you can make a "federal case" out of if you want to-your call totally...

 

It might be a blessing in disguise for your family to take a break, then later gather up some internet safety classes and lay down boundaries together.

 

Lots of choices to make down the road.

[fourcatmom]

Who would even report this to. What if it's not a 12 yo? It is a wake up call but I have to know we are safe too.

 

I don't know what to do.

 

The forum owner is going to sanction all activity from that IP.

 

Absolutely yes, there are ways to circumvent/change an IP. My gut feeling is that this is a 12 year old at home; but it is the WWW and you can't bank on that.

 

The account activity (all three of them most likely) is registered from a very distinct address, and it most likely will stop this cold in it's tracks..but...

 

This is one of those things you can make a "federal case" out of if you want to-your call totally...

 

It might be a blessing in disguise for your family to take a break, then later gather up some internet safety classes and lay down boundaries together.

 

Lots of choices to make down the road.

[Bang!Zoom!]

You stop down to your friendly police department and ask for help. :)

 

That's a huge step. HUGE. HUGE.

 

It's a crime.

 

If it's an instant message system, chances are your personal information is safe.

 

Is there a profile with your real anything (name/address/state etc.) on it with that site?

[Plucky]

Do you mind me asking what site?

[Bang!Zoom!]

When I say profile/site, I mean the site which the messages were sent through.

 

The horse site.

[fourcatmom]

Do you mind me asking what site?

 

Howrse.com

[fourcatmom]

I bought some passes at some time and they have that info but I already contacted them about that to see if it can be removed. There is nothing on her page that says her , email. It does same her name, state, lives with mom, dad, cats, bird,

 

When you say, it's a huge...as in not a good idea...I don't want to start a war with someone. I want to be safe and feel secure. I can't see the police doing anything...they are short officers. Why would they care?

 

 

 

You stop down to your friendly police department and ask for help. :)

 

That's a huge step. HUGE. HUGE.

 

It's a crime.

 

If it's an instant message system, chances are your personal information is safe.

 

Is there a profile with your real anything (name/address/state etc.) on it with that site?

[Bang!Zoom!]

When you/family/dd signed up there, did she include any actual bio information?

 

When you register sometimes at sites, to get an account...you have to fill in a name/city/zip/age or some other field.

 

It's always good form to put in false information and throwaway accounts for things like this.

 

Most of the times internet sites have what are called TOS (or terms of service) which outline in a very legal way who and how the site can be used, and if you misuse it (as is the case here) what ramifications or punishments will be applied.

 

Sometimes they are age restricted/content restricted, or you agree to disclosures in the fine print.

 

It might even be that it says "users must be over 18", and by clicking "okay" I verify I'm over 18 years of age. They do this because of different cyber-legal laws written to protect children.

 

Sometimes that fine print is giving authority to market your email account, sell your telephone number should you put it in...it's always something...

 

Edit:

 

They care (they being the police) because it is a law. They don't get to pick and choose their response to something like this.

 

It's really an experience the first time you are introduced to the not so nice stuff with your kids as the receiver (ugh)..and you have to make that determination of what risk you are at on your own.

 

If you google things/ideas like internet safety for children, you'll come to sites that can help you understand your options better.

 

Laws vary from state to state, but there are federal thresholds also.

Edited July 20, 2011 by one*mom

[readinmom]

Wow...the Dr. Phil show today was dedicated to victims of cyberbullying. Very scary stuff. It wouldn't hurt to call your local police department and see if there is anything that they can do/suggest. At least this way, you have it on record that someone did cyberbully your daughter. Even if this person was joking, the language and images it provoked were frightening.

[PollyOR]

That is awful! I'm so sorry your sweet girl was exposed to such awful ideas :sad:

 

I play an online game played mostly by teens. I've seen some awful things said there. I believe the anonymity of being online encourages behavior which normally wouldn't take place face-to-face.

[Bang!Zoom!]

This I feel may be age appropriate guide for discussion later.

 

If you look through the menu, there are suggestions and steps on coping during an event like this.

 

http://www.ncpc.org/topics/by-audience/parents/internet-safety

 

Look for the PDF file about the 3rd from the bottom. It is titled: How To Avoid Being Stalked in Cyberspace (and What To Do If You Are)

[fourcatmom]

Thank You for your help. I do appreciate it. I contacted the site owner, the company. I will see what they say. I read the online police department form for reports but I don't know what I want to do. I can't really see them doing anything but it would be on record.

 

I don't think I am going to sleep tonight. I feel sick knowing that she thinks that someone wants to do this to her.

[Bang!Zoom!]

Things will be better tomorrow. You'll find the way to the answers that work for your family and comfort your daughter in your time.

 

Statistically, you are way ahead of the game here mom.

 

Most parents never even find out. They have no idea.

 

Take extra good care of yourself (sleeping/rest/joy/prayer/food/loving thinking) right now, like right this very second.

 

You'll need strength and clarity to carry and lead the child tomorrow.

[leeannpal]

Thank You for your help. I do appreciate it. I contacted the site owner, the company. I will see what they say. I read the online police department form for reports but I don't know what I want to do. I can't really see them doing anything but it would be on record.

 

I don't think I am going to sleep tonight. I feel sick knowing that she thinks that someone wants to do this to her.

 

I really feel for you and your daughter :grouphug: I have an almost 9 year old daughter myself.

 

Please take some time and stress to your daughter that this is a random act and that this person does not know her. I would hate for her to be taking it very personally althought I'm sure that is her first thought. You might point out that this person is a sick individual who has probably sent this sort fo message to many people before.

[arghmatey]

How mean! I'm so sorry.

[LauraGB]

Good G*d. I would be all sorts of crazy if any of my children received filthy, horrible threats like that! Admittedly I don't understand the murky laws surrounding internet communication, but I would consider that a threat to do bodily harm to a child, a threat of s*xual assault to a child, and a threat to murder a child. I'd be contacting the police asap.

 

:grouphug: to you both.

[Mommy22alyns]

Wow, that is horribly disgusting! I'm so sorry for your sweet girl. :grouphug:

[amyrjoy]

Oh my....I'm so sorry. That is truly horrifying! Ugh! I may pm you to see what site because my DD loves horses and I'd like to be aware if we ever get her signed up on a horse site. She loves AnimalJam and I get leery at times but it seems they manage accounts pretty good.

[K&Rs Mom]

I really feel for you and your daughter :grouphug: I have an almost 9 year old daughter myself.

 

Please take some time and stress to your daughter that this is a random act and that this person does not know her. I would hate for her to be taking it very personally althought I'm sure that is her first thought. You might point out that this person is a sick individual who has probably sent this sort fo message to many people before.

 

:iagree: Mine will be 9 in a couple weeks, and I can't imagine dealing with this. Definitely stress to her that this is not for real, someone thought they were being funny or something, and that something is wrong with that person, not anything she did wrong. Hopefully if she feels safe IRL, crazy internet stuff won't bother her as much. Those are terrible words, no matter how old you are, but I think it's easier for adults to know that it's not for real.

[creekland]

Thank You for your help. I do appreciate it. I contacted the site owner, the company. I will see what they say. I read the online police department form for reports but I don't know what I want to do. I can't really see them doing anything but it would be on record.

 

I don't think I am going to sleep tonight. I feel sick knowing that she thinks that someone wants to do this to her.

 

I'd report it. If it's a 12 year old they'll soon learn the internet isn't as anonymous as they thought and it will be a super good lesson.

 

If it's someone older, they'll soon learn the internet isn't as anonymous as they thought and it will be a super good lesson.

 

Not reporting it lets them continue their fun with just a mild slap on the wrist by being banned from one site. There are plenty of other girls out there and many other sites.

[ma23peas]

Agree with all the others...call the police, no problem there...they really are out to help...and seriously, having a police officer in the city the perpetrator is from get a friendly knock on the door is helpful...you have no idea what prompts a person/child to say things like that...they themselves could be in an abusive home...police need to know.

 

My girls frequent horseisle.com and have never had any problems...I highly recommend that site over the one you mentioned. I think the best thing you can do is be in control of the situation, be confident you're doing the right things, do not let her see your fear..she needs to know you've got her back in an assertive loving way....and let her talk her feelings out if she needs to...did she come with you about it or did you find these things? Just print out every bit of conversation b/w the two of them and ask the moderators that you want to be informed of their actions on a daily basis...stay on them!

 

Good luck!

Tara

[asta]

Howrse.com

 

domain: howrse.com

reg_created: 2006-07-27 18:38:38

expires: 2012-07-27 18:38:38

created: 2006-07-27 20:38:38

changed: 2011-05-03 15:33:00

transfer-prohibited: yes

ns0: aiguille.nexen.net

ns1: storm.nexen.net

owner-c:

nic-hdl: OI153-GANDI

owner-name: OWLIENT SA

organisation: OWLIENT SA

person: Olivier Issaly

address: 28 rue de chambery

zipcode: 75015

city: Paris

country: France

phone: +33.155765620

fax: +33.148560412

email: f42e9cbbcafc37bcc855cbd478574e5c-636439@contact.gandi.net

lastupdated: 2011-05-27 13:53:33

admin-c:

nic-hdl: OI153-GANDI

owner-name: OWLIENT SA

organisation: OWLIENT SA

person: Olivier Issaly

address: 28 rue de chambery

zipcode: 75015

city: Paris

country: France

phone: +33.155765620

fax: +33.148560412

email: f42e9cbbcafc37bcc855cbd478574e5c-636439@contact.gandi.net

lastupdated: 2011-05-27 13:53:33

tech-c:

nic-hdl: OI153-GANDI

owner-name: OWLIENT SA

organisation: OWLIENT SA

person: Olivier Issaly

address: 28 rue de chambery

zipcode: 75015

city: Paris

country: France

phone: +33.155765620

fax: +33.148560412

email: f42e9cbbcafc37bcc855cbd478574e5c-636439@contact.gandi.net

lastupdated: 2011-05-27 13:53:33

bill-c:

nic-hdl: OI153-GANDI

owner-name: OWLIENT SA

organisation: OWLIENT SA

person: Olivier Issaly

address: 28 rue de chambery

zipcode: 75015

city: Paris

country: France

phone: +33.155765620

fax: +33.148560412

email: f42e9cbbcafc37bcc855cbd478574e5c-636439@contact.gandi.net

 

 

Firstly, any domain owner can be found via whois.com. This one is particularly slimy because they put their contact e-mail (which is gibberish, as you can see) as a .jpg so it couldn't just be copied (I typed it in manually).

 

So the guy who owns this site is in France, and his name is Olivier Issaly.

 

Second, everyone who owns a site (a "URL") hosts it somewhere. And every host has a set of rules, or "terms of service" (TOS). Some are lenient to non-existant (think: porn sites). Some are so restrictive that you can't even sneeze without breaking them (seriously: I looked at some that, if someone put a plug for their side business in their sig - even without my knowledge or permission - I'd be shut down w/o warning). This guy is using a hosting site called nexen.net (Alterway hosting).

 

So... the bad news for Olivier is that the three-time offender of your daughter (and Olivier's ineffectual moderators) have managed to break section 6.2 of his TOS with Nexen:

 

6.2 Contenu

Afin de respecter ses obligations aux termes des conditions générales de vente et de respecter les législations applicables, le CLIENT s'engage à ne pas diffuser directement ou indirectement, de quelque manière que ce soit et sous quelque forme que ce soit, par le biais directement ou indirectement des SERVICES, tout contenu notamment:contraire à l'ordre public et aux bonnes moeurs; pornographie ou à caractère pédophile; à caractère injurieux, diffamatoire, portant atteinte à l'honneur ou à la réputation, raciste, d'incitation à la haine raciste ou encore de négationnisme des crimes contre l'humanité; d'expression outrageante, de terme de mépris; de menace de quelque nature que ce soit adressée à une ou plusieurs personnes; d'incitation à commettre un délit, un crime, et plus généralement tout acte répréhensible par la loi; de piratage informatique sous toutes ses formes; de contrefaçon, ou imitation de droits de propriété intellectuelle (droit d'auteur, droits voisins, marques, brevets, dessins et modèles); et plus généralement de tout contenu portant préjudice aux droits de tiers.

 

I don't think I have to translate it.

 

You have proof enough to have his site shut down permanently. But only if you have screen captures of all of those IMs.

 

 

 

asta

Edited July 20, 2011 by asta

[Twigs]

:grouphug:

[Teachin'Mine]

I agree with what's been said about contacting police, etc. The creep alluded to her being 11, not 9. Did she give her age as this, or did she post any pictures on that site? I'd be even more concerned if she posted pictures and has all that personal info on the site. Definitely pursue this beyond the site administrator. :grouphug:

[mommymilkies]

Oh wow. I am so sorry for your daughter to be going through this. Well, I'm definitely not letting my kids do any boards now!

[J-rap]

I am so sorry, I'd feel sick too, and probably wouldn't sleep. Others have given you great advice. Can I also offer you some gentle advice? Perhaps 9 years old is too young to be emailing, or even on the internet alone. Perhaps an online "buddy" would help. At some point, we put that rule in place in our household - no internet use unless a sibling or parent was at your side. It would not have prevented those awful emails from coming, but perhaps an older buddy would have seen and screened them before your daughter had a chance to see them. Or, perhaps no email or Facebook until teen years? Possibly, rules like that would protect your sweet daughter until she is at least a little older.

[Guest Dulcimeramy]

Asta, you rock. Well done.

[NanceXToo]

Asta, you rock. Well done.

 

:iagree: What great info!

 

To the OP, I'm so sorry your daughter had to read trash like that. :(

[Orthodox6]

This is just my personal viewpoint. NO website at which verbal interaction occurs is "safe." Not even the WTM boards. Think about the insults hurled here at times. We roll with it because we are seasoned adults with rhino-hides. Of course, pornographic and crime-intended posters such as your poor dd heard from would be sizzled at once by the WTM community and by the board owner. But underlying point remains true. If one communicates with utter strangers, one is at risk for receiving Lord-knows-what in reply.

 

Meanwhile, I am aching that your dd had to experience something like this. :grouphug:

 

P.S. Asta, we all owe you enormous thanks for your research. I had forgotten about checking the "whois" info. Thank you so much !

[speedmom4]

I would call the police. That was a threat against your child. You are right that they probably won't be able to do anything about it but the officer might be able to give you some good information on how to deal with the internet and safety. Your daughter might feel better knowing that the police know about the situation.

 

God Bless,

Elise in NC

[butterflymommy]

If you believe the person who sent this is an adult, I would certainly contact the police-- whether they will do anything about it depends on what kind of department you're dealing with/ where you live. If this indeed was an adult they could face a number of charges since the threat was sexual in nature.

[Mrs Mungo]

There are websites intended for kids where they can interact, but only with "set" phrases. I restrict my kids to those types of sites until they are older.

[Guest jrb]

You might also contact your local FBI office. I have a friend whose husband specializes in cybercrime with FBI. They may have more resources/experience than your local police.

 

http://www.cybercrime.gov/reporting.htm#cc

[fourcatmom]

You might also contact your local FBI office. I have a friend whose husband specializes in cybercrime with FBI. They may have more resources/experience than your local police.

 

http://www.cybercrime.gov/reporting.htm#cc

 

 

There were a lot of questions to respond to here. She ended up sleeping with me last night, which was fine. I knew she was scared. Hopefully, she won't feel this way each day. It's a strong lesson and what I have been worried about all along. She did read the messages and then contacted a mod and then asked me to come in her bedroom (she was in the living room). By the time we got in there, she pretty much just feel apart but she was worried that I was going to be mad. She was shaking and crying. I told her that there was nothing that she could have done to warrant such abusive and violent messages. I do think that sometimes she "rubs" people the wrong way and I am sure that she can come across as strong over the internet and I don't know why the person thought she was 11. She has birthday, name and state in the profile. Maybe the other child is 11. I don't know. I would hate that my child could ever talk to someone like that. She is scared that they are going to do that to her. I keep trying to tell her that the person doesn't know where we live and that we are safe and that they were just angry words, very angry words and that what the person did was illegal. I am not ever sure if she understands all the words but she got the death part.

 

Again, thank for all the resources and I am going to pursue this as much as I can. I hate to think of another child going through this. There was no age limit on this site, I have seen younger children.

Edited July 20, 2011 by fourcatmom

[fourcatmom]

domain: howrse.com

reg_created: 2006-07-27 18:38:38

expires: 2012-07-27 18:38:38

created: 2006-07-27 20:38:38

changed: 2011-05-03 15:33:00

transfer-prohibited: yes

ns0: aiguille.nexen.net

ns1: storm.nexen.net

owner-c:

nic-hdl: OI153-GANDI

owner-name: OWLIENT SA

organisation: OWLIENT SA

person: Olivier Issaly

address: 28 rue de chambery

zipcode: 75015

city: Paris

country: France

phone: +33.155765620

fax: +33.148560412

email: f42e9cbbcafc37bcc855cbd478574e5c-636439@contact.gandi.net

lastupdated: 2011-05-27 13:53:33

admin-c:

nic-hdl: OI153-GANDI

owner-name: OWLIENT SA

organisation: OWLIENT SA

person: Olivier Issaly

address: 28 rue de chambery

zipcode: 75015

city: Paris

country: France

phone: +33.155765620

fax: +33.148560412

email: f42e9cbbcafc37bcc855cbd478574e5c-636439@contact.gandi.net

lastupdated: 2011-05-27 13:53:33

tech-c:

nic-hdl: OI153-GANDI

owner-name: OWLIENT SA

organisation: OWLIENT SA

person: Olivier Issaly

address: 28 rue de chambery

zipcode: 75015

city: Paris

country: France

phone: +33.155765620

fax: +33.148560412

email: f42e9cbbcafc37bcc855cbd478574e5c-636439@contact.gandi.net

lastupdated: 2011-05-27 13:53:33

bill-c:

nic-hdl: OI153-GANDI

owner-name: OWLIENT SA

organisation: OWLIENT SA

person: Olivier Issaly

address: 28 rue de chambery

zipcode: 75015

city: Paris

country: France

phone: +33.155765620

fax: +33.148560412

email: f42e9cbbcafc37bcc855cbd478574e5c-636439@contact.gandi.net

 

 

Firstly, any domain owner can be found via whois.com. This one is particularly slimy because they put their contact e-mail (which is gibberish, as you can see) as a .jpg so it couldn't just be copied (I typed it in manually).

 

So the guy who owns this site is in France, and his name is Olivier Issaly.

 

Second, everyone who owns a site (a "URL") hosts it somewhere. And every host has a set of rules, or "terms of service" (TOS). Some are lenient to non-existant (think: porn sites). Some are so restrictive that you can't even sneeze without breaking them (seriously: I looked at some that, if someone put a plug for their side business in their sig - even without my knowledge or permission - I'd be shut down w/o warning). This guy is using a hosting site called nexen.net (Alterway hosting).

 

So... the bad news for Olivier is that the three-time offender of your daughter (and Olivier's ineffectual moderators) have managed to break section 6.2 of his TOS with Nexen:

 

 

 

I don't think I have to translate it.

 

You have proof enough to have his site shut down permanently. But only if you have screen captures of all of those IMs.

 

 

 

asta

 

I am going to print the pages today.

[Teachin'Mine]

Michele you may want to delete mention of the other sites your children like as the creep from the horse site might find this thread and you don't want him following her anywhere. Not likely to happen, but it doesn't hurt to be extra cautious. I'm hoping that with the info Asta got for you that the authorities are able to take care of this problem. I'm so sorry for your daughter. :grouphug:

[Slartibartfast]

I don't know how to go about that. They said they are dealing with it. I don''t really know what that means but I have expressed great concern and they tell me they are concerned as well. What else can I do? I guess they aren't really emails, but more messages through the website. They don't have access to personal information, as far I know.

 

It sounds like they are working on the issue :)

 

You might ask for an update in a week or so but I think most admins would be able to handle this.

[Nakia]

There were a lot of questions to respond to here. She ended up sleeping with me last night, which was fine. I knew she was scared. Hopefully, she won't feel this way each day. It's a strong lesson and what I have been worried about all along. She did read the messages and then contacted a mod and then asked me to come in her bedroom (she was in the living room). By the time we got in there, she pretty much just feel apart but she was worried that I was going to be mad. She was shaking and crying. I told her that there was nothing that she could have done to warrant such abusive and violent messages. I do think that sometimes she "rubs" people the wrong way and I am sure that she can come across as strong over the internet and I don't know why the person thought she was 11. She has birthday, name and state in the profile. Maybe the other child is 11. I don't know. I would hate that my child could ever talk to someone like that. She is scared that they are going to do that to her. I keep trying to tell her that the person doesn't know where we live and that we are safe and that they were just angry words, very angry words and that what the person did was illegal. I am not ever sure if she understands all the words but she got the death part.

 

Again, thank for all the resources and I am going to pursue this as much as I can. I hate to think of another child going through this. There was no age limit on this site, I have seen younger children. It was one of the only sites they go on. They also love poptropica and wolf (the one through yellowstone park).

 

How scary! I'm sorry that happened. Is her profile public? Meaning, does whomever sent her those messages have access to that info?

 

Please contact the police.

 

Well done, asta! Great info! I didn't even know you could get a hold of info like that.

[fourcatmom]

How scary! I'm sorry that happened. Is her profile public? Meaning, does whomever sent her those messages have access to that info?

 

Please contact the police.

 

Well done, asta! Great info! I didn't even know you could get a hold of info like that.

 

 

Just her name, state and family stats...that she lives with mom, dad, ect. No pictures. No other personal info. I am trying to get more info from the mods as to if they think this was a child or an adult. I think that will determine my cause of action.

[LauraGB]

Just her name, state and family stats...that she lives with mom, dad, ect. No pictures. No other personal info. I am trying to get more info from the mods as to if they think this was a child or an adult. I think that will determine my cause of action.

 

I always have my kids lie when they are asked for birthdays or where they live. I suppose that could be teaching them bad things, but I've explained it quite thoroughly to them, and they always ask me first when information is required. The chosen date of birth always put them over 16 because the creepy predators look for young children.

 

I always hate when they want to join sites that are aimed at kids (even though I understand the particular site you are talking about isn't aimed at an age group). I don't allow it because you never know how old the other people are. Seems a perfect place for the weirdos to hang out and fib about their own age.

 

Gosh - I'm just sick for you and your dd. Things should just not be this way.