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Why you shouldn't redshirt for Kindergarten:


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#1 isaacbernstein

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 10:34 AM

For those of you who don't know, redshirting is the act of delaying a child's kindergarten entrance by a year. Some parents do it in the hopes of giving their kid an academic advantage. While that may work at first, it hurts the child in the long-run. Here is my experience.

 

I was born on July 3rd, and made the cut-off in my area by a solid 2 months. However, at the advice of my pre-school teachers, my parents decided to wait until I was 6 to put me in Kindergarten. At first, it was pretty awesome. I was taller than most of my classmates and better in sports. The problem, however, was that some of my classmates thought I was dumb, because I was a grade behind. A lot of them didn't seem to understand that it wasn't my choice to start school a year late. In high school, it was really awesome being the first to drive, as all my friends thought I was really cool. It wasn't until I was a senior in high school that I realized my parents may have done me a disservice. It really sucked to be stuck on a high school campus as an adult. High schools are not designed for adults which is why I felt so out of place my senior year. That was why I was really excited to start college. By the 2nd semester of my freshman year, almost everyone was an adult, so I felt like I fit in once again. My junior year, however, I hit another bump. I turned 21 right before my junior year, but because my friends were 19 and 20, I couldn't go to a bar for my birthday. And throughout my junior year, if I wanted to go to a bar, I would have to go by myself, and if I wanted to hang out with my friends, I couldn't go to a bar. But it was my senior year of college when I truly realized that my parents had done me a disservice. That was the year I should have been starting my career and earning real money, but instead, I was still stuck doing homework and studying for exams. I entered the real world and started working at 23 instead of 22, a year late. To this day, I still feel behind. When I retire, I'm probably going to have less earnings than I would have otherwise, and every time there's a mile-stone, such as buying a new house, or getting a promotion, I keep thinking, "I would have been doing this one year earlier." So remember, while it may not seem like a big deal for a 5-year-old to be in pre-school instead of elementary school, that child will one day be a 22-year-old in college senior instead of out in the world and earning money.

 

I'm currently having this issue with DS, who was born on August 5th. His pre-school teachers have been strongly advising me to redshirt, but because of my experience, there is no way I'm doing this. He may not be a star athlete and he may not always be at the top of his class, but so what? My job is to prepare to become a self-supporting and successful adult and to teach him that he doesn't need trophies or to always be the best in order to be happy. I've learned from my parents' mistake and I want to make sure that he doesn't get a late start in life like I did. I also don't want his classmates thinking there's something wrong with him.

 

So if your child has a summer birthday, send them on time. They'll be thanking you when they're 18 and in college pursuing their dreams rather than still in high school and they'll thank you again when they're 22 and in the real world instead of still in college.

 



#2 Monica_in_Switzerland

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 10:48 AM

ETA:   There's a TROLL in the dungeons!!!

 

Personal anecdotes do not make facts or statistics.  I hate clickbait titles like this, and yet, here I am.  

 

You have NO IDEA how your life would look had you not been redshirted.  Perhaps you were not actually ready for the next grade, as your teachers, who had probably met  hundreds of kids before, seemed to think.  Perhaps you would have failed one or multiple grades rather than simply starting later.  Perhaps your ability to drink with all your friends in college would have led to you dropping out of school.  Who the heck knows?  This post is absolutely absurd.  

 

If you don't want to redshirt your kid, then don't do it.  That's your right as a parent.  

 

And as Elsa says, "Let it go."


Edited by Monica_in_Switzerland, 06 May 2017 - 01:32 PM.

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#3 FloridaLisa

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 10:54 AM

I could not disagree more.

 

Being mature is not a disservice. It can save you from all manner of scenarios that could absolutely wreck your school and life. Maybe you would have been mature anyway? But trying to keep up with kids who are more mature isn't always best. 

 

Driving first? Yes. I purposely wanted my late summer birthday kids to be able to drive themselves rather than have to depend on their friends. This isn't why we chose to red shirt at all, but it was a nice bonus. 

 

Held back in school? Many homeschoolers dual enroll and take APs in high school allowing them to enter college as sophomores and juniors. So it doesn't put them behind for graduation/work/career/savings at all. 

 

Savings at retirement? Red shirting never stops anyone from saving at any point. One of my sons worked all the way through college and his summers, lived super frugally and amassed a really sizeable investment nest egg before he graduated. So that's a red herring from the start.


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#4 reefgazer

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 10:58 AM

Exactly; we have had the opposite experience as OP.  *Shrug*  OP spent the same amount of time in school as any other kid, just shifted 1 year older; as if delaying one year into the workforce was soul-crushing, LOL.

 

 First post here - I'm skeptical of the motives.  I call troll.

Personal anecdotes do not make facts or statistics.  I hate clickbait titles like this, and yet, here I am.  

 

You have NO IDEA how your life would look had you not been redshirted.  Perhaps you were not actually ready for the next grade, as your teachers, who had probably met  hundreds of kids before, seemed to think.  Perhaps you would have failed one or multiple grades rather than simply starting later.  Perhaps your ability to drink with all your friends in college would have led to you dropping out of school.  Who the heck knows?  This post is absolutely absurd.  

 

If you don't want to redshirt your kid, then don't do it.  That's your right as a parent.  

 

And as Elsa says, "Let it go."

 


Edited by reefgazer, 06 May 2017 - 10:59 AM.

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#5 OneStepAtATime

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 10:59 AM

What an odd post as your first post on this board.

I think the above posts clarify how I feel but I will add a few things.

First, I'm sorry that your experience was a negative one. I agree that if a child is neurotypical and seems to be developing at a normal rate then holding them back doesn't automatically seem like a good idea at all. But assuming that all children should never be given more time based on your personal experience and personal assumptions about how your life might have been if things had been different is not exactly a compelling argument for thinking that all children should never be given extra time. As mentioned above, if you HAD been out drinking with buddies maybe that would have negatively affected your life. If you HAD started school on time based on the local cutoff dates maybe whatever it was your teachers were concerned about really would have negatively affected your academics or your ability to relate to peers. There is no way to know at this point. I really hope you can find peace with this and I am sorry that it negatively affected you.

FWIW, my dad felt the opposite, though, and wished all his life his parents had given him another year to mature. He was the baby in his class throughout his academic career. Everyone else got to do things before he did. He was immature for his age and even though he was very bright he was behind academically for years. He was small for his age until he hit a growth spurt at 17 so people frequently thought he was even younger. He hated it. It affected his self-esteem. Finally, towards the end of his college years he finally felt like he fit in.

My daughter is very bright but had learning challenges that caused her a lot of stress. She was also the youngest in her class and frequently was not as mature or ready as her classmates that were nearly a year older. It causes self esteem problems. Repeating a grade was a HUGE help to her. It bought her the time her brain and body needed to mature and it bought me the time I needed to tweak out a better path for her. She has no regrets so far as a 16 year old. In fact, she is grateful so far that we made that choice. I guess only time will tell if she feels the same way further down the road.

I have friends who felt they were too young and pushed through school too soon. I have friends who were grateful their parents or the cut off age in their area gave them more time. I also have friends who feel as you do. And resent their parents for the decision they made. I think basically that each child and each family are different. There is no crystal ball. Sometimes the decisions we make in the moment turn out to be the wrong one but as parents all we can do is try our best.

I hope you can find a way to look at the positives in your life and be happy, even if the path your parents put you on is not what you wish it had been.

Edited by OneStepAtATime, 06 May 2017 - 01:14 PM.

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#6 OneStepAtATime

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 11:00 AM

Exactly; we have had the opposite experience as OP.  *Shrug*  OP spent the same amount of time in school as any other kid, just shifted 1 year older; as if delaying one year into the workforce was soul-crushing, LOL.

 

 First post here - I'm skeptical of the motives.  I call troll.

Yeah, me too.


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#7 Calming Tea

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 11:00 AM

Nm

Edited by Calming Tea, 06 May 2017 - 11:00 AM.


#8 FloridaLisa

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 11:01 AM

Exactly; we have had the opposite experience as OP.  *Shrug*  OP spent the same amount of time in school as any other kid, just shifted 1 year older; as if delaying one year into the workforce was soul-crushing, LOL.

 

 First post here - I'm skeptical of the motives.  I call troll

 

Me too. Pot stirring for sure. ;) 


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#9 Another Lynn

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 11:17 AM

Well the beauty of homeschooling is that you can adjust either way.  I have one with an August bday that we "red-shirted" in what we reported to the district (not that anyone there cares what grade level we report - but it gave me peace of mind to report him in the grade below).  For most athletic activities this child meets cut offs to be the grade older.  So, for example if he played on a team with other "4th graders" and they wanted to enter a tournament, he ended up being too old to officially be part of the team.  At this point he is academically ready to be called the older grade and he will have more appropriate sports opportunities if we call him the older grade (and sports is an important interest to this particular child).  So, we're going to "skip" him up.  (I still don't regret "red-shirting" him initially - it's always easier to "skip up" than "hold back" even if it is only "on paper.")  

 

Another child of ours has a December b-day, but has been doing work a grade level "ahead."  We have been having the conversation about which year to graduate him, and it may well be as a 17.5 yo instead of an 18.5 yo.  Our oldest turned 18 in October and graduates this month.  Senioritis is real :laugh:  - keeping a kid in highschool for an entire year or more after they turn 18 may or may not be in their interest.  I love that for our homeschool kids we have the flexibility to decide how to handle it.  


Edited by Another Lynn, 06 May 2017 - 12:30 PM.

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#10 snowbeltmom

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 11:21 AM

 

For those of you who don't know, redshirting is the act of delaying a child's kindergarten entrance by a year. Some parents do it in the hopes of giving their kid an academic advantage. While that may work at first, it hurts the child in the long-run. Here is my experience.

 

I was born on July 3rd, and made the cut-off in my area by a solid 2 months. However, at the advice of my pre-school teachers, my parents decided to wait until I was 6 to put me in Kindergarten. At first, it was pretty awesome. I was taller than most of my classmates and better in sports. The problem, however, was that some of my classmates thought I was dumb, because I was a grade behind. A lot of them didn't seem to understand that it wasn't my choice to start school a year late. In high school, it was really awesome being the first to drive, as all my friends thought I was really cool. It wasn't until I was a senior in high school that I realized my parents may have done me a disservice. It really sucked to be stuck on a high school campus as an adult. High schools are not designed for adults which is why I felt so out of place my senior year. That was why I was really excited to start college. By the 2nd semester of my freshman year, almost everyone was an adult, so I felt like I fit in once again. My junior year, however, I hit another bump. I turned 21 right before my junior year, but because my friends were 19 and 20, I couldn't go to a bar for my birthday. And throughout my junior year, if I wanted to go to a bar, I would have to go by myself, and if I wanted to hang out with my friends, I couldn't go to a bar. But it was my senior year of college when I truly realized that my parents had done me a disservice. That was the year I should have been starting my career and earning real money, but instead, I was still stuck doing homework and studying for exams. I entered the real world and started working at 23 instead of 22, a year late. To this day, I still feel behind. When I retire, I'm probably going to have less earnings than I would have otherwise, and every time there's a mile-stone, such as buying a new house, or getting a promotion, I keep thinking, "I would have been doing this one year earlier." So remember, while it may not seem like a big deal for a 5-year-old to be in pre-school instead of elementary school, that child will one day be a 22-year-old in college senior instead of out in the world and earning money.

 

I'm currently having this issue with DS, who was born on August 5th. His pre-school teachers have been strongly advising me to redshirt, but because of my experience, there is no way I'm doing this. He may not be a star athlete and he may not always be at the top of his class, but so what? My job is to prepare to become a self-supporting and successful adult and to teach him that he doesn't need trophies or to always be the best in order to be happy. I've learned from my parents' mistake and I want to make sure that he doesn't get a late start in life like I did. I also don't want his classmates thinking there's something wrong with him.

 

So if your child has a summer birthday, send them on time. They'll be thanking you when they're 18 and in college pursuing their dreams rather than still in high school and they'll thank you again when they're 22 and in the real world instead of still in college.

 

 

Ok, I am killing time waiting for my D to finish an activity, so I'll take the bait....

 

So do you think parents who would wait a year to send a child with a summer birthday to school are doing this because they want a star athlete who is at the top of the class?  My guess is that these parents are taking the advice of the pre-school teachers who understand that K today is what 1st grade was a generation ago and many kids are not ready for the structure and academics of this new K.

 

I can assure you that no classmate would think that there was something wrong with a child that was 6 years old in K.  In fact, in many districts, your son would miss the cut-off and would not be able to enroll in K at the age you are planning on enrolling him.  If anything, the K teacher is going to wonder why you ignored the advice of the pre-school teachers.

 


 


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#11 OneStepAtATime

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 11:56 AM

Ok, I am killing time waiting for my D to finish an activity, so I'll take the bait....

 

So do you think parents who would wait a year to send a child with a summer birthday to school are doing this because they want a star athlete who is at the top of the class?  My guess is that these parents are taking the advice of the pre-school teachers who understand that K today is what 1st grade was a generation ago and many kids are not ready for the structure and academics of this new K.

 

I can assure you that no classmate would think that there was something wrong with a child that was 6 years old in K.  In fact, in many districts, your son would miss the cut-off and would not be able to enroll in K at the age you are planning on enrolling him.  If anything, the K teacher is going to wonder why you ignored the advice of the pre-school teachers.

 

 

Agreed.


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#12 Paige

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:13 PM

Eh, I was redshirted based on being super small for my age alone. I was fine. I suspect I would have been fine if I went on time too even though I was still always the smallest or one of the smallest in my grade. 

 

I've redshirted one of my kids and sent another one with an even earlier birthday on time. They're both fine and I seriously doubt that starting school plus or minus one year makes a significant impact on most children's long term success. I think you should make your decision based on what's best for the 4-6yr old you have in front of you in the immediate future. 


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#13 Jean in Newcastle

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:24 PM

So. . . someone who's oldest child is in preschool is telling us all how we should parent our kids?  Not that people with young children can't have good opinions etc. but most of them are wise enough to know that they aren't in a position of being an authority.  Even those of us who have kids in college are hopefully wise enough to know that we aren't authorities on how all kids should be parented even though we too can have opinions.

 

(I have no problem with the OP deciding that he doesn't want to redshirt his own child.  That's his prerogative.  My issue is  with the rather condescending tone and his assumed mantle of redshirting expert. .) 


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#14 JudoMom

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:30 PM

If you wanted, you could've graduated high school or college early by taking classes over the summer. Take ownership and stop blaming your parents and living in the what-ifs.

Do what you want with the kid you have, but your arguments against redshirting (seriously, you're‚Äč bummed your friends couldn't drink on your birthday and you really lost that much income from entering the workforce a year later?) has done little to convince me of your belief.
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#15 winterbaby

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:31 PM

Life isn't about trophies - but it's a big deal if you buy a house when you're a year older than some imaginary person. Mmmmm-kay.

This sounds like it was written by a young person without experience of those later life milestones, naively imagining that they come all lined up in precise order like school, with anyone whose situation is a bit irregular really standing out. Doubt they've even been to college, which these days is full of non-traditional students and folks who take more than five years. Who even exclusively befriends people in their exact class? OP in case you're a real teenager projecting all this, I promise it doesn't work that way at all.
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#16 SJ.

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:34 PM

OP, obviously you should do what your family decides is best for your child. To be honest, the emphasis on not having friends old enough to go out drinking with seems a bit immature and not a valid reason to consider when deciding whether to redshirt or not.
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#17 Carol in Cal.

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:35 PM

Being this mad at your parents over something they probably agonized over and decided on your behalf in hopes that it would benefit you strikes me as indicative of Issues.  I suggest that you think about this a bit more and pursue some healing.  You sound overly focussed on this to me.


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#18 bolt.

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:40 PM

I'm so happy to be part of a school district that has a wide range of ages for parents to choose to start their kids in K. The ages of K students eligible to start K in September range from 4y5m to 5y11m. This provides two possible entry years for almost every student and invites parents to make whichever decision seems best for their kid.

It seems like in this system children don't grow up expecting everyone to be the same age just because they are in the same grade. Nor do they become fixated (as you have been) on various life event having specific years where they "should" happen. Life doesn't work that way, so it's nice when school doesn't lead children into such rigid and unhealthy thinking.

I've only every been aware of the terminology of "red shirting" because I am interested in education in different places. Nobody here second-guesses parents on the decisions when to start school for their children, and nobody uses the term "to red shirt" to describe the choice of the later available start year.

(Also, 21 is the strangest drinking age in the entire world. The custom of 'celebrating' that age by beginning to drink immediately, symbolized by going to a bar on that birthday, is kind of pathological on a culture-wide basis. If you want to talk about feeling 'behind'... Many Canadian young adults have been drinking for 3 full years before they turn 21. Many European countries allow children and teens into drinking establishments at any age, even if they can't be served. Even more than that, family-style drinking is perfectly normal for young teenagers in lots of countries.)

#19 luuknam

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:43 PM

If you wanted, you could've graduated high school or college early by taking classes over the summer. Take ownership and stop blaming your parents and living in the what-ifs.

 

 

My wife wanted to take summer classes to graduate faster, but her parents didn't allow it, and, apparently, you cannot just take summer classes without parental consent. FTR, it worked out wonderfully for her parents, as she dropped out at 17 instead.



#20 arctic_bunny

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:45 PM

I was younger than all my friends. Too bad my parents didn't redshirt me so I could go to bars with everyone else! I don't know why Mom and Dad were so inconsiderate.
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#21 JudoMom

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:47 PM

My wife wanted to take summer classes to graduate faster, but her parents didn't allow it, and, apparently, you cannot just take summer classes without parental consent. FTR, it worked out wonderfully for her parents, as she dropped out at 17 instead.


That's a bummer. I did take classes and graduated early.

Still, even if that was the case with the OP, he still had the option in college as an adult.
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#22 SilverMoon

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:48 PM

I was redshirted. The social impact you're complaining about did not apply to me. Not going to a bar for my 21st wasn't even on my horizon. LOL My biggest issue was I was always ahead academically and bored. out. of. my. gourd. Like take sporks to your eyes bored. They didn't get around to actually challenging me until I'd given up on school.

 

I will say be careful you're not projecting you onto your kid. There is no right answer for all people. My big boys have fall birthdays and started K just before they turned 5. One needed another year (or more..) to mature and we added a year later on. One has thrived. One girl who started "on time" with a summer birthday suddenly had her wings fiercely twitching to fly in her junior year and probably won't have an official senior year. Another late summer birthday grade skipped so she could feel more comfortable in her own skin. One blanket answer based on my experience would have only served one of these four kids who have been raised the same way.


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#23 luuknam

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:49 PM

(Also, 21 is the strangest drinking age in the entire world. The custom of 'celebrating' that age by beginning to drink immediately, symbolized by going to a bar on that birthday, is kind of pathological on a culture-wide basis. If you want to talk about feeling 'behind'... Many Canadian young adults have been drinking for 3 full years before they turn 21. Many European countries allow children and teens into drinking establishments at any age, even if they can't be served. Even more than that, family-style drinking is perfectly normal for young teenagers in lots of countries.)

 

 

Yep, in NL you can buy wine/beer at 16, liquor at 18. Though they're not as paranoid about carding people either - I bought a bottle of rum when I was 14 - I told the liquor store clerk I was baking a cake, and wasn't sure whether I'd want light or dark rum (which was true), and then went on to buy it, without him asking my age at all, nor ID, obviously. Which was 18 years ago... here I still get asked for ID about half the time (I don't think I've ever been asked for ID for alcohol purchases in Europe). 



#24 Barb_

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:50 PM

I was younger than all my friends. Too bad my parents didn't redshirt me so I could go to bars with everyone else! I don't know why Mom and Dad were so inconsiderate.


:lol:

#25 luuknam

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:51 PM

That's a bummer. I did take classes and graduated early.

Still, even if that was the case with the OP, he still had the option in college as an adult.

 

 

Oh, I quit reading the OP after the first paragraph, what with it being a troll. ;)


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#26 Jean in Newcastle

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:54 PM

I'm so happy to be part of a school district that has a wide range of ages for parents to choose to start their kids in K. The ages of K students eligible to start K in September range from 4y5m to 5y11m. This provides two possible entry years for almost every student and invites parents to make whichever decision seems best for their kid.

It seems like in this system children don't grow up expecting everyone to be the same age just because they are in the same grade. Nor do they become fixated (as you have been) on various life event having specific years where they "should" happen. Life doesn't work that way, so it's nice when school doesn't lead children into such rigid and unhealthy thinking.

I've only every been aware of the terminology of "red shirting" because I am interested in education in different places. Nobody here second-guesses parents on the decisions when to start school for their children, and nobody uses the term "to red shirt" to describe the choice of the later available start year.

(Also, 21 is the strangest drinking age in the entire world. The custom of 'celebrating' that age by beginning to drink immediately, symbolized by going to a bar on that birthday, is kind of pathological on a culture-wide basis. If you want to talk about feeling 'behind'... Many Canadian young adults have been drinking for 3 full years before they turn 21. Many European countries allow children and teens into drinking establishments at any age, even if they can't be served. Even more than that, family-style drinking is perfectly normal for young teenagers in lots of countries.)

Family style drinking is legal in 29 states in the US as well. 



#27 Plum Crazy

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 12:58 PM

http://www.dcurbanmo...ist/635337.page

 

https://www.reddit.c...r_kindergarten/

 

 


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#28 isaacbernstein

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:00 PM

That's a bummer. I did take classes and graduated early.

Still, even if that was the case with the OP, he still had the option in college as an adult.

 

Uh, I did take summer classes. This was so I could spread out more and not have to overload myself. My parents were the ones paying and they would never have allowed to load up and graduate early.



#29 winterbaby

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:06 PM

Uh, I did take summer classes. This was so I could spread out more and not have to overload myself. My parents were the ones paying and they would never have allowed to load up and graduate early.

 

More evidence of trollery. When you actually get to college, you'll learn that graduating early is cheaper.

 

I don't really understand the ways of trolls. What do you get out of putting your issues all over the internet, whether they're the issues you're actually discussing or something else? 'Cause clearly there's some issues.
 


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#30 OneStepAtATime

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:10 PM

http://www.dcurbanmo...ist/635337.page

https://www.reddit.c...r_kindergarten/


Well imagine that! Our troll is trolling in multiple locations.
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#31 SJ.

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:11 PM

http://www.dcurbanmo...ist/635337.page

https://www.reddit.c...r_kindergarten/


It is interesting he took out the parts about not being able to be with girls and worrying about getting into fights as an 18yo.
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#32 Jean in Newcastle

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:24 PM

It is interesting he took out the parts about not being able to be with girls and worrying about getting into fights as an 18yo.

 

Tailoring to his perceived audience?  That's some good rhetoric skills there! 


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#33 calihil

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:35 PM

I'm sorry but this is just silly. I missed the cut off date by 21 days and I also was always one of the oldest in my class. I don't think it hurt me at all and I rarely even think about it now at 31 years old.

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#34 Jean in Newcastle

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:36 PM

I started first grade when I was five.  :scared: Does that mean that I was greenshirted? 


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#35 Carol in Cal.

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:44 PM

I started first grade when I was five.  :scared: Does that mean that I was greenshirted? 

Yeah, me too.

I was the youngest, smallest kid in my class all the way to college.

And I usually had the best grades.

If I had had to wait another year before starting school it would have driven me crazy.  Not to be able to learn to read for one more year--I shudder to think of it.


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#36 SKL

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:45 PM

I tend to agree about b&m high school not being designed for adults.  That was a problem for several people in my family - including me, and I graduated high school at 16.

 

I do agree that when I was a kid there was a stigma to being old for the grade.  People assumed that kid was dumb.  Not sure that's the case any more, since it's so common.  I have a friend who put both of her kids in school a year late, and both of them were elected class president in elementary school.  Not that I'd follow her example, but at least that kind of kills the stigma argument in the present day.

 

I have concerns about red-shirting (as opposed to placing the kids according to ability, which is different).  I know people who do this just to give their kids an advantage or an "easy ride."  In those cases I am no fan of it, but it's not my business what other people do.  They know their kids, and I know mine.


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#37 OneStepAtATime

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:46 PM

I started first grade when I was five. :scared: Does that mean that I was greenshirted?


LOL. Yes.
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#38 Homeschool Mom in AZ

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:46 PM

I'm addressing this specifically not because I think the OP is legitimate, but so readers considering these issues can think through the arguments people make against red-shirting.I agree that red-shirting can be appropriate or inappropriate, depending on the child.  I think the cons listed by the OP are frankly, remarkably unimportant. 

 

Good reasons to red-shirting a child include:

 

1. the child isn't as emotionally mature as his/her age mates and can't handle the higher emotional expectations in the next grade level

 

2. the child's brain isn't as developed as his or her age mates and isn't ready for the increased academic demands of the next grade level

 

Bad reasons to red-shirt a child include:

1. wanting a child, who is capable of the academic demands, to have an advantage academically by being above average for the grade but not for the age

 

2. wanting the kid to be physically bigger than kids in their grade for a sports advantage or as a way to deal with possible bullying situations

 

3. wanting to participate in a trend without thinking the issues through

The OP fails to address several things:

Most kids have friends that are both a year or two older and a year or two younger than they are.  So just about everyone in their early 20s has friends for a few years that can't legally get into bars with them.  That's not a reason to make an academic decision for 4, 5 and 6 year olds.  I was 19 and dating a 27 year old fireman for a year.  I was not the only one who couldn't go to a bar with the work crowd because there were 20 year old firemen who couldn't get in themselves and there were 21-27 year old firemen with girlfriends in the 18-20 year old range who couldn't get into bars legally.  My middle daughter is 2 year younger than her 21 year old finance.  She get can't go to a bar with him.

This is something so universally common, it's seems the OP isn't legitimate.  Who didn't have a close friend or significant other who was a year older or younger than them, and knows this isn't a valid argument?  In those situations, people go to restaurants that serve alcohol to the 21+ people and soft drinks to the 20- crowd all the same table. Problem easily solved.

Red-shirting isn't uncommon.  So what if another kid thinks you're dumb because you're older?  That's something some kids think about each other all time whether or not red-shirting has happened.  It's very common for kids to say, "I had a late birthday" and people know what that means.  The opinions of other age mates isn't a valid reason to make an academic decision contrary to the recommendations of teachers who deal with this all time and have expertise and knowledge based on what teachers of older students have to say on the topic.

Feeling out of place your senior year because you're an adult seems strange to me.  So because you're a whole 365 days older than the people in class next to you you can no longer relate to them or the structured environment?  Really?  Plenty of us turned 18 months before graduation and aren't lamenting the fact our mommies didn't start us early (especially back in the 70s when kids could start earlier. I don't know what policies have been since then on starting early.)

As for being 22 and not graduated from college, um, you do know plenty of people don't graduate from college by 22, right?  Some start later because of taking a gap year to travel, taking off school time to work and save money for tuition, taking another skills training route that they decided isn't for them so they go back to college, working at a temp agency to try different jobs and fields before spending time and money on a specific degree, floundering for a year, having an unplanned baby, working to make money to contribute to their household in financial stress, serving in the military, interning, and probably half a dozen other things I haven't thought of off the top of my head. 

All that angst over not going to a bar with your younger friends on your birthday?  How old are you now, OP?  Because your reasoning doesn't sound like the thinking of an experienced adult who would know about all the things I listed. My oldest daughter is 21. Her fiance is 4 months younger than her, and he couldn't to go a bar with her the day she turned 21.  It wasn't a tragedy.  We went to a restaurant with family and friends so those who were 21 could order drinks and those who weren't could still be there and celebrate with her. 

The percentage of 22 year old college graduates who are starting their careers and earning real money is historically low.  It's not just the people who were red-shirted.  Isn't that all the talk about Millennials and their unfortunate situation?  Surely you have heard analysis about that somewhere between social media, news sources and in person conversations. 

Maybe instead of focusing on your feelings about being 18 for a year in high school and not getting to go to a bar with certain friends on your 21st birthday, you listen to the preschool teachers about WHY they recommend red-shirting and asking the K-3rd grade teachers their take on the pros and cons of red-shirting.  That's how grown ups decide things, based on facts, not on feelings they had in their teens and early 20s.

Additionally, the possibility of starting out older but graduating early does exist. Between summer school, homeschooling early on for a while to catch up and testing back in with age mates, private tutoring, dual enrollment, community college instead of some or all of high school, and such a decision at the preschool age isn't set in stone hence forth and ever more.


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#39 SKL

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:47 PM

Though, not being able to take one's friends to bars isn't really compelling to me.  :p


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#40 snowbeltmom

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:51 PM

Though, not being able to take one's friends to bars isn't really compelling to me.  :p

 

Especially when those who wanted to go to bars, but were underage, just used their fake id's. 


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#41 SKL

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:57 PM

Yeah, it is very common for students to take ~5 years to finish college due to changing their major, which may or may not be due to not really knowing "what they want to do when they grow up" at the end of high school.  I have no idea whether this is more or less common for students who start college a little older.

 

In my family, the ages to complete college (Bachelor's) ranged from 21 to, hmm, mid-40s.

 

My first date was with my college classmate when he was 20 and I was 17.  We were both freshmen.



#42 SKL

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:58 PM

Especially when those who wanted to go to bars, but were underage, just used their fake id's. 

 

LOL I wouldn't know.  :p

 

Actually the drinking age for beer was 18 when I was in college.  But I was never a drinker anyway.  Bars were gross, especially back when people smoked in there all night long.
 


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#43 JudoMom

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 01:59 PM

Uh, I did take summer classes. This was so I could spread out more and not have to overload myself. My parents were the ones paying and they would never have allowed to load up and graduate early.

 

Oh, yes, wouldn't want the poor bunny to have to work a little harder to get what was wanted.  Better to let your parents pay for your education and then troll the internet complaining how they robbed you of a year of your life.


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#44 SKL

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 02:02 PM

Yeah, me too.

I was the youngest, smallest kid in my class all the way to college.

And I usually had the best grades.

If I had had to wait another year before starting school it would have driven me crazy.  Not to be able to learn to read for one more year--I shudder to think of it.

 

Perhaps there should be a sister thread on greenshirting, LOL.
 


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#45 Carol in Cal.

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 02:05 PM

Perhaps there should be a sister thread on greenshirting, LOL.
 

Well, it certainly wouldn't be a brother one, LOL.


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#46 maize

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 02:06 PM

When it comes to shirts, one size (or color!) does not fit all :)

Edited by maize, 06 May 2017 - 02:07 PM.

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#47 whitehawk

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 02:11 PM

Another greenshirted kid here. Set for life, of course, having had an extra year!

 

I started college at 17 and finished at 21. I didn't bother getting a license until 18, though, nor drinking just because it was legal when I was 21. I also waited until the ripe old age of 22 before getting married.

 

Time is but a stream I go a-fishing in, right?


Edited by whitehawk, 06 May 2017 - 02:16 PM.


#48 snowbeltmom

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 02:15 PM

Another greenshirted kid here. Set for life, of course, having had an extra year!

 

I didn't bother getting a license until 18, though, nor drinking just because it was legal when I was 21.

I hope all of you greenshirted kids have thanked your parents for your adult successes.  I shudder to think how things would have turned out if your parents had made you stay home an extra year instead of sending you to school.

 


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#49 whitehawk

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 02:18 PM

I hope all of you greenshirted kids have thanked your parents for your adult successes.  I shudder to think how things would have turned out if your parents had made you stay home an extra year instead of sending you to school.

 

I know, right? Sitting around reading Little Golden Books and watching Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood for another year could've ruined everything. How could I have gotten as good at opening milk cartons as I am today?

 

On a serious note, though, I could've done college at 16 if school were designed better for acceleration. (What color shirt is that??) Buy like Lynn said upthread, that's why it's nice that homeschoolers, at least, can flex.


Edited by whitehawk, 06 May 2017 - 02:23 PM.

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#50 OneStepAtATime

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Posted 06 May 2017 - 02:20 PM

When it comes to shirts, one size (or color!) does not fit all :)


Love this.
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