Why be PC???

[OnTheBrink]

I like what you say :) In my own life, I have to deal with the temptation to go against political correctness on the issue of the acceptance of gay marriages. Please don't bite my head off....my own grandfather was a homosexual who married my grandmother hiding his inclinations and it led to disaster and the damage didn't stop with one generation...I struggle with keeping my opinions to myself on the issue of gay rights and adoption because of my family's experience. Being PC all the time has its own pain.

 

I know exactly what you're talking about. :grouphug:

[joannqn]

If you want to feel really sick to your stomach, try this- ask people how race has impacted their life. Most white people will say it hasn't. It's no shock to me that a lot of people don't understand some of the reasons for using PC terminology.

 

I find that while race has not impacted my life in the way I assume you are meaning, but it has impacted my life. I've found that I go out of my way to treat African Americans differently...better...than I do anyone else in order to be PC. For example, when I'm grocery shopping, I'm usually concentrating on my shopping, not on the other customers in the store. However, I've noticed that I notice those that are African American and make a point to look them in the eye and smile at them just so they don't think I'm not smiling at them because I'm racist.

 

Another example was when my kids and I read Dr. Doolittle. My kids didn't notice that the book was "racist", nor did I until I read a review on Amazon pointing it out. I wanted to review the book on my blog, but I knew at least one of my readers was African American and I was afraid of offending them by giving the book a positive review.

 

Because of PC, I live my life in fear of accidentally offending African Americans even though I don't care what color someone's skin is. PC has made it so that I have to care. It used to be that I could treat everyone equally but now I feel that I have to give special consideration to those who are dark-skinned.

 

I find that I actually edit alot of what I say here in order to be more PC because it just isn't worth the hassle to be open.

 

Same here. Sometimes I delete an entire post and don't post at all because I can't figure out how to word something perfectly. There have been threads I wanted to start, because I needed the advise, but didn't for fear of making someone angry.

 

But she was white and so did not get the job.

All I know is that racism works more than one way.

 

This is very true...although we white folk (and I don't consider myself white) aren't allowed to call it racism.

 

So, I truly don't see how, once hurtful speech is pointed out to the person using it, they can continue to use those words and expect to be considered kind.

 

Because your new speech, as determined by the person whose feet you stepped on, will step on someone else's toes. In order to be truly PC, you'll need to know what each individual person considers correct and make sure you only use their preferred terminology within their hearing. I don't know what you'd do if you are within earshot of two people with opposing views.

 

The PC culture has taken this too far (IMO). For instance, my son is mentally retarded, and sometimes, even I don't know how to reply when asked his condition. He IS mentally retarded. BUT, it is crossing the line when another child will call him "retard" in a derogative way. I am offended when people go around using the word "retard" for a person that did sometihing not so smart. And if done over and over again, I will say something and why. But mental retardation is a physical disability and to put a different label on it doesn't make it different from what it is.

 

I agree. My brother is mentally retarded. It's the correct term for what is medically wrong with them. Mentally = involving the mind or intellectual process. Retarded = delayed in development However, at some point in my childhood, I remember it became unacceptable to say that's what he was; I had to use "differently-abled" instead. Well, in the case of my brother, he was delayed in every aspect of development and wasn't "abled" even in a different way. I still struggle with how to describe his condition when asked. My current way is to say that he suffers from "Fragile X Syndrome", to which everyone (except certain informed medical professional), asks what's that. Then, I have to go into a complete explanation what what Fragile X Syndrome is. After several minutes, we finally get to what could have been said in two words: mentally retarded.

 

It boils down, for me, that PC is taking consideration to the EXTREME. At some point, we may all just have to lock ourselves in the house without a phone and computer, in order to avoid interacting with others in case we might offend someone who doesn't even care.

Edited April 15, 2009 by joannqn

[mo2]

Didn't read the other responses, but here's mine:

 

Why wouldn't you be PC? It is a matter of respect to other people. It's kindness to other human beings. If you know that saying a certain word or calling a name hurts someone's feelings, why would you do it? Most of us here wouldn't...unless we just didn't stop to think.

[Jumping In Puddles]

I agree. My brother is mentally retarded. It's the correct term for what is medically wrong with them. Mentally = involving the mind or intellectual process. Retarded = delayed in development However, at some point in my childhood, I remember it became unacceptable to say that's what he was; I had to use "differently-abled" instead.

 

 

It boils down, for me, that PC is taking consideration to the EXTREME. .

 

I'm guessing mentally retarded went out of fashion because retarded became an insult among non-mentally retarded people and I think it has the connotation of people doing something stupid when they know better so when your talking about a mentally retarded person it seemed insulting.

 

I know what your saying, though and I agree - it is taking consideration to the extreme.

[LisaNY]

I always picture cast iron pots when I hear or say that phrase. Isn't that where it originated from?

 

I just googled it, and found this:

 

The term “the pot calling the kettle black†is usually used in the sense of accusing someone of hypocrisy. The origins of the phrase date back to at least the 1600s, when several writers published books or plays which included wordplays on the theme of the pot calling the kettle black. Despite suggestions that the phrase is racist or nonsensical, the meaning is actually quite obvious when one considers the conditions of a medieval kitchen.

Typically, pots and kettles were made from heavy materials like cast iron, to ensure that they would last and hold up to heat. Cast iron tends to turn black with use, as it collects oil, food residue, and smoke from the kitchen. Both pots and kettles would also have been heated over an open fire in a kitchen of the medieval period. As a result, they would have become streaked with black smoke despite the best cleaning efforts.

Since both are black, the pot calling the kettle black would clearly be an act of hypocrisy. The act could also be described by “it takes one to know one,†and it suggests a certain blindness to one's personal characteristics. There is another explanation for the term, involving the pot seeing its black reflection reflected in a polished copper kettle. In this sense of the pot calling the kettle black, the pot does not realize that it is describing itself.

One of the earliest written instances of the pot calling the kettle black appears in Don Quixote, by Cervantes. The epic book was published in the early 1600s, and had a big influence on the English language. Numerous terms and idioms have their roots in Don Quixote, such as “quixotic†to describe an idealist. Shakespeare also played with the concept in one of his plays, as did many of his contemporaries. The phrase has been twisted and expanded over the centuries, appearing in forms like “pot, meet kettle.â€

Some people believe that the phrase is racist, since it refers to the surface color of the objects involved. These individuals might want to keep in mind that in a modern kitchen, the idiom might be “the pot calling the kettle silver,†in a reference to the fact that many modern pots and kettles are made from polished stainless steel. In this particular instance, skin color has nothing to do with the idiom, except in the sense that both of the objects involved are the same color.

[KidsHappen]

It took me a minute to figure out what that had to do with this thread. :lol:

 

Me too. :lol:

[CAMom]

Because your new speech, as determined by the person whose feet you stepped on, will step on someone else's toes. In order to be truly PC, you'll need to know what each individual person considers correct and make sure you only use their preferred terminology within their hearing. I don't know what you'd do if you are within earshot of two people with opposing views.

 

 

 

 

 

This is exactly right! This is what makes my head spin about the whole "PC" movement. You are corrected on some term you're using by someone telling you it's offensive. So, out of kindness and respect, you change the term you use to the one the offended party told you to use. You now use that term in front of someone else who is offended by the new term.

 

Arrrrrrgggggghhhhh!!

 

So, you're walking on eggshells all the time. I would never use my words to hurt or offend on purpose but it is impossible to please all of the people all of the time.

[Jenny in Florida]

Because your new speech, as determined by the person whose feet you stepped on, will step on someone else's toes. In order to be truly PC, you'll need to know what each individual person considers correct and make sure you only use their preferred terminology within their hearing.

 

I don't think this is necessarily true. Personally, I find it possible not to step on someone else's toes once I step off the first set.

[stripe]

I've found that I go out of my way to treat African Americans differently...better...than I do anyone else in order to be PC. For example, when I'm grocery shopping, I'm usually concentrating on my shopping, not on the other customers in the store. However, I've noticed that I notice those that are African American and make a point to look them in the eye and smile at them just so they don't think I'm not smiling at them because I'm racist.

 

Another example was when my kids and I read Dr. Doolittle. My kids didn't notice that the book was "racist", nor did I until I read a review on Amazon pointing it out. I wanted to review the book on my blog, but I knew at least one of my readers was African American and I was afraid of offending them by giving the book a positive review.

 

Because of PC, I live my life in fear of accidentally offending African Americans even though I don't care what color someone's skin is. PC has made it so that I have to care. It used to be that I could treat everyone equally but now I feel that I have to give special consideration to those who are dark-skinned.

 

You really live your life in fear because you might not smile at someone at the grocery store?! (What exactly are you afraid of? That they might....yell at you? bite you? or that they'll go home and cry because the white lady didn't smile at them?)

 

I bought a copy of Dr Dolittle and immediately took it out of my "to read" pile for my kids, just from browsing through. With all due respect, a book where the black ape prince is made white so he can marry the princess has no racist undertones at all to you or your kids? (It didn't even remind you of Michael Jackson.) Not even the references to "darkies" and that mysterious "n" word didn't catch your eye? If certain things aren't sending off flags of possibly being offensive, then it's amazing to me that you think not smiling at someone is going to ruin someone's life forever.

 

I consider inane PC terms to be such as in Kozol's book "The Shame of the Nation" where he talks of school districts talking of "diversity" where 98% of the students are African American, and where all the schools named after Martin Luther King and Rosa Parks are such schools. I don't consider being kind or smiling at people to be frightening. But then my family is mixed!

Edited April 15, 2009 by stripe

[OH_Homeschooler]

This is a long thread so pardon me if I'm repeating what others have said...but I have been accused of "just" being PC when I was talking about a belief I had. Maybe it was something like saying that Affirmative Action is a good thing, or saying I believe that homosexuals should be allowed the same privileges as heterosexuals. When I say these things, I'm saying them because I believe them. I'm not saying them to "be PC," and I consider it insulting when people say that about my beliefs.

[AuntPol]

It took me a minute to figure out what that had to do with this thread. :lol:

 

As a long-time Mac user, I've never had a virus. :001_smile: I use a PC at my job and I curse it every. single. time.

 

Is it un PC to say PCs stink? I hope so! :D

 

 

I was just trying to lighten the mood lol because you know we humans just take things so seriously that we forget to just enjoy life and all it's quirks.

 

Anyway, I am sure my computer is greatly offended that it's name has been turned into a such a derogatory word. Since you all misuse the name so much, I guess it will have to change it's name to MCC for Microsoft Compatible Computer or SBGR computer for Support Bill Gates Retirement computer.

[5kidsforME]

Actually - my mom was more qualified for a job and didn't get it because she was white.

We were broke. Electricity getting turned off all the time.....

 

But she was white and so did not get the job.

 

 

I needed foodstamps when I was pregnant with dd and my black skinned case worker NEVER cooperated with me AT ALL, and she was a rude brat. After 2 months of this I finally got wise and called her supervisor, the supervisor's supervisor, the one above her, AND the one above her.

 

It was a white woman who finally said that she would take care of it and I got my VERY MUCH NEEDED foodstamps the very next day. Was it because I was white that I was not getting them earlier?

 

Be assured that poor white people understand race discrimination in a financial way.

Maybe rich white people understand it socially, I don't know......

 

All I know is that racism works more than one way.

 

Word.

[OnTheBrink]

I was just trying to lighten the mood lol because you know we humans just take things so seriously that we forget to just enjoy life and all it's quirks.

 

Anyway, I am sure my computer is greatly offended that it's name has been turned into a such a derogatory word. Since you all misuse the name so much, I guess it will have to change it's name to MCC for Microsoft Compatible Computer or SBGR computer for Support Bill Gates Retirement computer.

 

Nah, just turn your MCC into an M-A-C and you'll not have to worry about it. :D:D:D

[joannqn]

You really live your life in fear....

 

I bought a copy of Dr Dolittle...

 

I've been verbally attacked by African American people and accused of being a racist for the stupidest things. One particular one that stands out (one of the first times) was in high school. I was in JROTC and was an officer. It was my job to judge and grade the uniform appearance of those in my company on uniform day. I graded everyone the same based on the standards set by the instructors. One particular African American boy didn't care about being in JROTC (he was only there because it enabled him to transfer to the school) and it showed. His uniform was wrinkled, not tucked in; his brass and shoes hadn't been shined. He earned a poor grade. A friend of his, an African American girl, tried to start a fight (inches from my face, yelling, threating to kick my *ss) and accusing me of being a racist because I "dissed" her friend. The irony of the whole situation is that I was dating an African American at the time and had several friends who were African American and here I am being accused of being racist. I've had people accuse me of being racist for "looking at them wrong" when I wasn't even looking at them but rather staring off into space in a different direction. That, and other experiences, have taught me to be very careful around African Americans unless I already know them as friends.

 

I'll admit that living here, in a bad part of town, has made me more fearful than I used to be. The week we moved in, we called 911 when two men were beating another man lying in the middle of the street. Turned out that a house across the street was a well-known gang house and the two men didn't like the one visiting their girl even though he had been invited by her. Another house that I can see from my window was a meth lab. Another house around the corner was just a drug house that was just shut down. I've seen a drive by shooting one block from my house. My older neighbor was shoved to the ground and had her purse snatched just one block away. And, a couple months ago, someone was murdered a couple of blocks from here. In this neighborhood, you have to be aware that someone might pull a knife or gun on you if you cross them the wrong way.

 

As far as the book, the slant I took was that the prince didn't like they way he looked. He thought something else was better and wanted to change his appearance to that which he thought might gain the girl's approval. I saw it as no different than anyone else who attempts to change their appearance through coloring their hair, plucking/shaving hair, tanning, or cosmetic surgery. When discussing this with my kids, that's how I explained it. I also realized that this book was written a long time ago and thus reflected the culture of that time period which I also explained to my kids. I've talked to my kids about racism and what it is, and they think it's just plain silly. People are people. They know people who are African American, Vietnamese, Hispanic, Korean, and Caucasian but they seem them all as people. They haven't learned how to be PC yet.

[Peela]

I think of the term " PC " as one that describes an extreme form of manipulating an unpleasant truth into something palatable, the way politicians manipulate truth to get what they want. It is basically dishonest.

 

Being kind doesn't mean you go around telling people about their faults unasked- being brutally honest all the time. Being kind is just being kind, and is different in every situation. I don't think it has anything to do with being PC.

 

People are PC when they want something, when they want to be seen a certain way, usually as kind, loving, honest people when they are not- They say the PC thing to gain popularity.

 

Being kind is far deeper than that- its the opposite of that, actually, and sometimes on the surface it doesn't look so good, but its coming from a deeper place thats far more selfless.

 

I have never seen being PC as a good thing.

[Peek a Boo]

I don't think this is necessarily true. Personally, I find it possible not to step on someone else's toes once I step off the first set.

 

The problem is that very often there ISN't anyone "stepping on toes": the person being offended has taken your foot and decided to place it on their toes. the person "being offended" has chosen to insert a meaning that was never intended or applicable, like in the "unbeliever" thread. That is irrational behavior, and a civilized society can't function on following irrational requests.

 

and the reason you "find it possible not to step on someone else's toes" is cuz the OTHER people are likely biting their tongue in kindness due to the pain you cause stepping on their toes. Not everyone complains just because they find something personally offensive.

 

don't mistake silence for agreement, and don't mistake someone speaking up as a true offense that requires major changes.

 

 

I came across another example of "PC" reading through the Homeland security's alert about right wing extremists: they mention illegal immigration as an issue, but then refuse to qualify what kind of "immigration" in the rest of their analysis. "a perceived lack of government response..." :lol:

[Peek a Boo]

I think of the term " PC " as one that describes an extreme form of manipulating an unpleasant truth into something palatable, the way politicians manipulate truth to get what they want. It is basically dishonest.

 

Being kind doesn't mean you go around telling people about their faults unasked- being brutally honest all the time. Being kind is just being kind, and is different in every situation. I don't think it has anything to do with being PC.

 

People are PC when they want something, when they want to be seen a certain way, usually as kind, loving, honest people when they are not- They say the PC thing to gain popularity.

 

Being kind is far deeper than that- its the opposite of that, actually, and sometimes on the surface it doesn't look so good, but its coming from a deeper place thats far more selfless.

 

I have never seen being PC as a good thing.

 

:iagree:

[OnTheBrink]

The problem is that very often there ISN't anyone "stepping on toes": the person being offended has taken your foot and decided to place it on their toes. the person "being offended" has chosen to insert a meaning that was never intended or applicable, like in the "unbeliever" thread. That is irrational behavior, and a civilized society can't function on following irrational requests.

 

 

 

:thumbup1::thumbup1:

[Jugglin'5]

You really live your life in fear because you might not smile at someone at the grocery store?! (What exactly are you afraid of? That they might....yell at you? bite you? or that they'll go home and cry because the white lady didn't smile at them?)

 

 

 

Well, perhaps you live in a different world than some of us. I was bullied, harasssed, and generally scared to death because I told a boy "no" when he asked me to go to a school dance with him (he was shorter than me, a very bad student, and I just generally didn't like him, but I had made the mistake of being civil to him in class). Pretty soon, I had several black kids following me around all the time muttering threats at the racist white girl. There was nothing I could do about it. I spent my whole eighth grade year terrified. I learned a lesson from that, and a sad one - be very cautious about who you are friendly with. Luckily, I changed schools and had some better experiences.

[mommaduck]

Well' date=' perhaps you live in a different world than some of us. I was bullied, harasssed, and generally scared to death because I told a boy "no" when he asked me to go to a school dance with him (he was shorter than me, a very bad student, and I just generally didn't like him, but I had made the mistake of being civil to him in class). Pretty soon, I had several black kids following me around all the time muttering threats at the racist white girl. There was nothing I could do about it. I spent my whole eighth grade year terrified. I learned a lesson from that, and a sad one - be very cautious about who you are friendly with. Luckily, I changed schools and had some better experiences.[/quote']

 

My case was the opposite. I moved back to the states from the Pacific and went into culture shock. I thought white people were mean :lol: My mama was mean, my stepdad could be mean (he even called me *n*...I'm part Native and had a thick southern accent when he married my mama), all the white teachers were mean, all the white kids were mean. The only people that were nice were the black kids, the black teacher, and the black counselor. Guess who did come to my wedding and who didn't: my dad and stepdaddy didn't...Daddy "G" did, one of my best friends' dad and the same man who used to insist on seeing my report card along with all 8 of his kids', gave me the same loving lectures he gave them, and had those "man to man" chats with my hubby when we were courting (hubby is also "white"/Native...but neither of us feel we fit in typical "white" culture...must be the Cherokee ;) ). My sisters were raised in Charleston, they also fit better with the black kids, grew up speaking Geechee, and stood by their friends during a school race riot.

[LilyK]

I will share my very first experience with being PC in America. Back when I was a naive youth, we were called "oriental." My parents used the term liberally, I used the term with no connotations other than indicating ancestry and heritage. I was proud to use it.

I will never forget my social studies teacher telling my class one day that it was not correct to use oriental anymore, but Asian, because oriental was considered too derogatory. This was the first time the idea that I should be ashamed to be "oriental", or that it was somehow undesirable to to oriental crossed my mind. I was hurt and offended by this little slice of PC. To this day, I will sometimes refer to myself as "oriental" just to watch an eyebrow go up, and also as a way of demonstrating that I can hold my head high despite the concerted efforts of pc proponents to make me feel different or victimized.

[Jugglin'5]

My case was the opposite. I moved back to the states from the Pacific and went into culture shock. I thought white people were mean :lol: My mama was mean, my stepdad could be mean (he even called me *n*...I'm part Native and had a thick southern accent when he married my mama), all the white teachers were mean, all the white kids were mean. The only people that were nice were the black kids, the black teacher, and the black counselor. Guess who did come to my wedding and who didn't: my dad and stepdaddy didn't...Daddy "G" did, one of my best friends' dad and the same man who used to insist on seeing my report card along with all 8 of his kids', gave me the same loving lectures he gave them, and had those "man to man" chats with my hubby when we were courting (hubby is also "white"/Native...but neither of us feel we fit in typical "white" culture...must be the Cherokee ;) ). My sisters were raised in Charleston, they also fit better with the black kids, grew up speaking Geechee, and stood by their friends during a school race riot.

 

:grouphug: There are mean people and nice people everywhere you go, and in every group aren't there?

[mommaduck]

:grouphug: There are mean people and nice people everywhere you go' date=' and in every group aren't there?[/quote']

Yep! :iagree: And not all of us fit in the "cultural box" that some assume we would upon first glance.