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Holidays with grown kids


saraha
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The way the holidays fall means there are lots of days off for dh and some of my grown kids, so we’ve gotten to spend a LOT of time all 8 of us together. Last night we went to the zoo lights. Today and tomorrow we will all be together again for the full days, today there was lots of eating, movie watching and video games. Someone would suggest a board game but a few are not board gamers. I got out a puzzle and put it out causally, but no one came by and worked on it. We did play this behind the scenes assassin game, but we are looking at all day at home eating again tomorrow. 
What do you do with a group of 6 kids 13-23?

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Our children are 13 years apart from top to bottom. I was a grandma when my 2 youngest were in Highschool. We lived 700 miles from our oldest and her family…so many many holidays with kids of all ages.

I just let it happen. Some nights were game nights at the table but there might be 2 different games happening..like Catan and Scrabble. Some nights we all played card games. One day DH and I went to a movie and just let them hang out together. Our den had a fireplace and the TV, lots of video games happened there. Our main living room was the quiet room..no TV, only conversation, music and later Grandkids toys, so kind of a mommy room.

We ate  together, cleaned up together and then life just happened. Don’t  stress, give your kids time to be siblings too. 
 

 

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I found felted snowballs at the dollar store, so we had a snowball fight. We have a 2 story open floorplan with a loft area, so there were people upstairs throwing snowballs at people downstairs. It was lots of fun. It was also very short because the 2 dogs are ball fiends and didn't like being outside when we were throwing balls. 

We've done something similar in the past with Nerf guns, but I was afraid one of the dogs would find a missed foam dart. 

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Mine are not that old yet.  I had grand plans of doing lots of things break, but then 2 kids got sick and we all just enjoyed spending 2 weeks at home with only dance for 3 of those days.  A nice break from the craziness of Nutcracker and then audition season.

This year we have done

Make Christmas ornaments, had an ugly Christmas cookie contest, Gingerbread house contest, decorated the tree, lots of Christmas movies, Lego building, kids all make presents for everyone in the family, and paint your own Christmas mug, lots of Christmas craft kids,games, and  puzzles.  We are not a video game family, we have never had a system at all.  

Just a lot of sleeping in and resting.

Edited by mommyoffive
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Mine are 34 and 25. They played video games together. We talked, laughed, and played chess. They piddled around with the guitar, banjo, and piano. We went to ds new house. They went out with friends. I made breakfast each morning. They played with the cats a lot. 
 

They are out together tonight and I am home alone. They will be home soon. I’m exhausted,  but we have had a wonderful time together. The boys are hilarious together. I’ll be sad to see them go. 

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We save up The Great British Baking Show and watch it together. They also watch other shows together. We have a puzzle out. They talk and joke. Their uncle game and we played games. We just kind of hung out. They went into town together and got coffee. 

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I know it’s a weird fluke of the calendar to have so many days together and we are definitely trying to make the most because life will probably not line up for us like this again so I appreciate all the suggestions. 

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I think it's fine to do some things all together, and some things with people doing what they want...  Older ones might want to do one thing, younger ones another.  Or some might want to create something together in the kitchen while others are taking a walk.

Sometimes when we're with big groups of mixed ages (mostly when it's extended family), we'll play games that are group games split into two teams, or just fun games when everyone is sitting in a circle with fun and silly activities.  For those occasions, everyone is invited and expected to take part.

You can't expect everyone to participate in everything together 24/7 though.  People will need a break from that now and then.

 

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I'll push the games if I want them to happen. There can be a certain amount of inertia sometimes and screens are easy. I'll say something like, "Everyone pick a game (we have a fair amount)." Then we play them until we run out of time, starting with the youngest's and ending with mine. Not everyone plays ever game. Some have limited player counts. That gives people an out for interests. Dh and I will play every game unless the child who chose whats particular siblings to play.

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This probably isn't helpful, but if the winds are low and it isn't raining, we launch rockets. They also all have really nice light sabers and do dueling. 😂 Welcome to nerdville.

That said, I don't expect my adult kids to be always interacting as a group. Everyone needs down time so it is also quite common for middle boy to head out for a long walk while eldest and wife are reading while youngest is geeking with his dad about some new electronics project, and I have my nose in gardening books or am walking the dog.

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Posted (edited)

What we have done today so far: had a waffle breakfast, set up the hot dog bar, one group watched polar express while another group played scrabble. Apparently the next 12 hours is the lord of the rings movies 🙄so I might be able to catch some needing a break from the movies to play a board game or go for a walk.

The hot dog bar has been a huge hit! We have 6 crockpots plugged in, one of each size down to the Little Dipper with baked beans in it 😆I took my biggest crockpot and filled it half full of Mac and cheese, then suspended an 8x8 cheap thin baking pan from the inner lip and filled it with tater tots (which the vegetarian likes to use in buns in place of a hot dog) I was ridiculously happy when the lid still fit on right 😆. I had to show everybody! My other big crockpot, I cooked turkey dogs, stood them up in a pint jar and set in crockpot, then cooked veggie dogs and stood them up in pint jar, then cooked regular hotdogs and filled in around the edges and it is working fantastic. Definitely going to be a repeat performer 

Last might we ended up watching a bunch of episodes of “the goes wrong show” and Studio C. In between we played a couple of games of this game called “gibberish” I picked up at Five Below. Dh couldn’t play so served as permanent judge and clue reader, so worked out really well. Will definitely play that again at a get together. It easily accommodated 7 players and dh as judge.

Edited by saraha
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Tonight marks the end of all of us being together since Friday evening, and I’m already weepy about it. Next time Christmas is on a Monday is 2028. By then two will have graduated college, two will be in college and youngest will be a senior. I’m pretty sure they won’t all 8 be staying 3 days at Christmas and then 3 days at New Years again, so trying to make the most.

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2 hours ago, saraha said:

Tonight marks the end of all of us being together since Friday evening, and I’m already weepy about it. Next time Christmas is on a Monday is 2028. By then two will have graduated college, two will be in college and youngest will be a senior. I’m pretty sure they won’t all 8 be staying 3 days at Christmas and then 3 days at New Years again, so trying to make the most.

Our time with our launching adults is so very, very precious! Now that my two are out and married, I'm so aware of how sweet and how fleeting the times we have all together.

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3 hours ago, saraha said:

Tonight marks the end of all of us being together since Friday evening, and I’m already weepy about it. Next time Christmas is on a Monday is 2028. By then two will have graduated college, two will be in college and youngest will be a senior. I’m pretty sure they won’t all 8 be staying 3 days at Christmas and then 3 days at New Years again, so trying to make the most.

Remember, they often “multiply” and come back home with more people than when they left. 
It’s  all good!

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I know this is late, but for others reading….my kids play cards and video games together. They have so much fun. They figured out that six people can play MarioKart together by connecting three Nintendo switches and setting up three TV screens. Just dance was a big hit as well. 

My kids also nap during the day (they stay up forever at night) and split off into various interests, which often includes just hanging out in their beds/rooms. We go through a lot of food, so we spend a lot of time acquiring, preparing, and consuming food. 

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Things we have done together:

Cooked/Baked

Played games.....so far Charades and Uno and some new game my son got for Christmas

Watched movies

Gone out to eat and shopping

And my personal bonding favorite......brought over loads from the storage units and unpacked.......(dripping sarcasm!).🤪

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We break out murder mystery games now.  It sounds macabre, but my kids really look forward to the 2-3 hours of entertainment and showing off their logic skills.  It's cooperative, keeps everyone invested, and is a break on the older kids for not spending money or being on the roads when it's crazy out.

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16 hours ago, KatieJ said:

Remember, they often “multiply” and come back home with more people than when they left. 
It’s  all good!

Yes. Math hurts!

We had four kids. We gained an honorary daughter, who then got married and gave us an honorary son. Dd got married and brought another son and three grandsons. Then eldest boy, and now we have a dil. Then we got another honorary daughter who got married and gave us a delightful honorary son, and now the group is very large, and generally very hungry if I am around to be kitchen elf because I am too stupid to stop making good food and fall for the big, puppy dog looks they give. 

And another long lost couple with no family, dear friends of youngest ds, appears to be trying to weasel into the family club, and likely, I won't be able to say no as I am weak willed and have a huge soft spot for abandoned, young adults.

I need a castle to house them all, and a farm to feed them!

Math will kill you in the end. 😂

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26 minutes ago, Faith-manor said:

 

I need a castle to house them all, and a farm to feed them!

Math will kill you in the end. 😂

Yes it will! Our children now live in “castles “ of their own . Finally we got tired. We retired, downsized immensely and let them do all the hosting!

No regrets.

 

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Our family plays cards.  As much as possible.  And oddly enough our plus ones didn't grow up doing so, so dil watches the grandsons while we play.  Bonus dd stopped over twice to play cards during the holiday, and when she found out her parents were coming here for NYE, asked to be invited with her husband.  And later, asked if her brother and his girlfriend could join in. lol  She and her husband stopped in at my dd and fiance's party for an hour before joining us.  

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