Wardrobe building- bras and other ?s

[Soror]

I've been saving a bit here and there and have some set aside that I'd like to use for a few nicer staple wardrobe pieces. I'm paralyzed as to what would be the most useful.

I know I need at least 1 good bra- I currently wear sports bras 24/7 just because my regular bras have lost their shape and are no longer comfortable

Maybe some everyday walkers? Something that is a bit nicer looking than a tennis shoe but just as comfortable. I considered some slip-ons by Birdies but I'm so undecided. I have the worst time finding shoes that I like.

Maybe leggings and a few nicer tshirts? I bought a pair from Duluth. I wear them some but I don't love the material. Some from a pair I bought from Athleta. I'd like some that are not skin-tight but not baggy. 

I considered one of the wool dresses. I like dresses but as I have a limited budget I'm not sure if I like them enough to pick one as a piece. TBH a lot of the ones I looked at looked too baggy for my taste. I like things more fitted. 

My body is curvy leaning towards pearish shape. 

I'm a sm/med on botton and sm for tops.

My budget is around $400

Edited September 16, 2023 by Soror

[MercyA]

@ktgrok recommended these leggings and I love, love, love them. So soft and comfortable. They are form-fitting, but they are NOT uncomfortably tight, at all. The high waist is flattering. They've lasted well through lots of washings.

I have an extra pair of gray ones that I've never worn (still in package). I already have a gray pair I hardly ever wear. They are L/XL. I'd be happy to send them to you so you can try before you buy if you would like. 🙂 

[Soror]

53 minutes ago, MercyA said:

@ktgrok recommended these leggings and I love, love, love them. So soft and comfortable. They are form-fitting, but they are NOT uncomfortably tight, at all. The high waist is flattering. They've lasted well through lots of washings.

I have an extra pair of gray ones that I've never worn (still in package). I already have a gray pair I hardly ever wear. They are L/XL. I'd be happy to send them to you so you can try before you buy if you would like. 🙂 

Thank you for the rec. and the generous offer. I'll check them out. I can always order and return them if I decide to try them. My size is more a s/med. It's not the comfort of the leggings that bother me but more the shirts to wear with them and I'm just not sure if I care for them anymore. IDk I obviously don't know exactly what I want. I need to look for some inspiration. I'm hoping the smart ladies here have some good ideas for me to help me figure out what I want 🙂

Thank you again!!!

[lmrich]

I am going to suggest that  you  need (deserve)  more than one good bra. 

Have  you looked into a capsule wardrobe?  

Edited September 16, 2023 by lmrich

[Soror]

Just now, lmrich said:

I am going to suggest that  you  need  more than one good bra. 

Have  you looked into a capsule wardrobe?  

Yes, probably!

I've looked just a bit. I tend towards minimalism so I love the idea but I get paralyzed picking pieces. I need to look into that more. 

[Bambam]

I find that good quality undergarments that fit and are comfortable are most important to me. If that part feels good, it helps the rest of the outfit be okay. Not supportive/staying up/falling down undergarments just bother me all the day long, so I vote for spending a little money first on those things. I buy one bra at time, handwash/hang dry, wait until another sale, buy another until I have enough to last a week. 

As for outside clothing, I tend to prefer thrift shops. You can try on a variety of brands of whatever until you find one (or hopefully more!) that fits and is comfortable. 

[fairfarmhand]

I know it’s a way off but I’ve found excellent sales on undergarments on Black Friday. I buy all that me and my girls need then for the whole year.

[Ali in OR]

Do you have a specialty bra/lingerie shop anywhere near you? They will do fittings and help you find the right bra and size for you. It never felt like a "need" when I was just homeschooling and didn't have an income of my own, but when I started working  I went in and found a great brand and fit for me in a completely different size than what I used to pick out for myself (went from 36A to 32C--Natori is now my brand, not sure what the style is called). And I found out bras are 20% off during your birthday month at this shop, so it's a yearly purchase now.

I was looking at the Athleta Brooklyn pant as a possible Christmas gift for my dd (first year teacher). Maybe it fits your description of legging-ish but not form fitting.

[DoraBora]

3 hours ago, Soror said:

Yes, probably!

I've looked just a bit. I tend towards minimalism so I love the idea but I get paralyzed picking pieces. I need to look into that more. 

Agree that good underthings are very important...  and I love to keep the number of pieces in my wardrobe low.

If it's overwhelming to begin, try looking for just one outfit that fits your style - say a pair of leggings or pants that you like (navy, gray, and black are nice because as base colors, they don't show Every.Little.Spot the way beige does), a nice fitted tee or pullover top (short or long sleeved).  Add a third item (open overshirt/vest/scarf/light fitted jacket). 

Get those first. 

THEN, when you have that first outfit, look for another top, maybe one with a slightly different silhouette or neckline, that might work as well with the bottoms from the first outfit.  I think the third layer is the factor to adds polish to your outfits.  Even a casual "statement" necklace, such as a pendant, can change up the look.

If it helps, I've found brands such as Caslon, Madewell, Halogen, Open Edit, Lucky Brand, and Treasure and Bond be the best quality for price.  A few of those brands may be exclusive to Nordstrom.  I've begun buying most clothing from Nordstrom because they have terrific sales and a generous return policy. 

hth

Edited September 16, 2023 by DoraBora

[prairiewindmomma]

Depending on your size and shape, you may need to be replacing bras every 6-12 months. A properly fitted bra is doing a lot of supportive work, and elastics and such wear out. For me, a bra is probably the most important piece of clothing that I wear as it determines a large amount of how I fit under my clothing. 
 

First, go get properly fitted to know your proper size. Most people end up in the wrong band size. Once you have that sorted, watch sales or go hit the racks at TJMaxx. Buy at least two good bras so that you can handwash and let stuff dry overnight as needed.

Beyond that, depending on your shape, you might also benefit from shape wear under your clothes. I do. My abdominal ligaments were damaged in pregnancy and no longer hold me together.

After you have your proper foundation garments, then think about what you want to buy. I would thrift relentlessly and only buy perfection. Or, I would focus on one stellar outfit with components that you can use to bridge to other outfits: blazer, scoop shirt, trousers. You could later add skirt or leggings or dress.

[Corraleno]

3 hours ago, Soror said:

I've looked just a bit. I tend towards minimalism so I love the idea but I get paralyzed picking pieces. I need to look into that more. 

The best way to start a capsule wardrobe is to go through your closet and purge anything that is worn, doesn't fit, doesn't go with anything else you own, or just never gets worn because you don't like it that much.

Then, based on the colors of what you already own, pick 1-2 dark neutrals, 1-2 light neutrals, plus 2-3 accent colors that go with your neutrals. (For example, my darks are black and navy, lights are white and light gray, and accents are shades of blue from pale aqua to gray-blue to deep blue-green.) 

Lay out all your clothes on the bed that are in the neutrals and accents you picked out and then look at what outfits you can make with those. So, using the example colors above, black pants & skirts in a pile, then navy pants & skirts in a pile, then white or gray pants, etc. Then above them lay out the cardigans/blazers/jackets in those colors. Put shoes and sandals on the floor below each pile of that color. Then take your tops and see how many outfits you can make.

After that it should be pretty clear where the "holes" are in your capsule wardrobe. Fill in the basics first — need a really good, nice-fitting pair of jeans in black or dark indigo? Need a nice fitted white tee or pretty white blouse? If all your basics are solid, add some print tops or scarves that include several of your chosen colors. Or maybe you have lots of dressy clothes and lots of around-the-house sweats & hoodies, but not much in the middle, so think about what you can add to what you have to create some nice-casual outfits, like a pair of nicer pants that will go with existing tops, or a really nice sweater that will dress up your jeans or chinos. And don't forget accessories — a nice belt, scarf, and/or handbag can make an otherwise boring, plain, solid color outfit look really polished & put together.

If you want to get some ideas of what capsule wardrobes in different colors could look like and how to put outfits together, google capsule wardrobe + whatever colors you want to see, or search for "Project 333" images. The Vivienne Files website (which I first heard about here on the board) has lots of different capsule wardrobe examples; most of them are smaller (like a travel capsule wardrobe that you can make 10-12 different outfits with), but she also does some Project 333 wardrobes, and it's easy to see how adding a few more neutral or white pieces + accessories could expand the limited capsules to a full wardrobe.

Project 333 is a thing where you limit your wardrobe to a total of 33 pieces for 3 months. She counts all shoes and accessories in that 33, but you also get 4 different 33-piece capsules (1 for each season). I don't follow that, but it's a good way to get an idea of what other people's capsules wardrobes look like in different colors.

My capsule wardrobe is ~35 pieces total, counting all summer and winter clothes, from nice-casual to dressy, not counting accessories or winter coats. That also doesn't count workout wear and around-the house clothes, which is several pairs of leggings/joggers and some old Tee Fury tees, plus 2 oversized flannel shirts and 2 hoodies for winter.

Here are some examples from The Vivienne Files (she often starts with a scarf or piece of art for the colors):

 

 

[BusyMom5]

I've recently found one line from Soma bras that fit me well.  I had to order several to find the right fit, but free shipping and returns, so just order them to try.  

What about the Ponte style pants at Maurices?  Tighter towards the bottom.  DD likes those.  I think with your job I'd want pants that didn't have a wide leg (fleas!) 

Shoes- I need new ones, too.  Looking at Clark's loafers. You could also do a short bootie, preferably flat with a more rubbery sole.  

[Soror]

2 hours ago, BusyMom5 said:

I've recently found one line from Soma bras that fit me well.  I had to order several to find the right fit, but free shipping and returns, so just order them to try.  

What about the Ponte style pants at Maurices?  Tighter towards the bottom.  DD likes those.  I think with your job I'd want pants that didn't have a wide leg (fleas!) 

Shoes- I need new ones, too.  Looking at Clark's loafers. You could also do a short bootie, preferably flat with a more rubbery sole.  

I'll check out the Soma bras. I don't care for wide leg pants so no worries there. I've looked some at Clark's but not found any that I like. I started looking for some short boots last year but again didn't find any I liked so I gave up. 

2 hours ago, Corraleno said:

The best way to start a capsule wardrobe is to go through your closet and purge anything that is worn, doesn't fit, doesn't go with anything else you own, or just never gets worn because you don't like it that much.

Then, based on the colors of what you already own, pick 1-2 dark neutrals, 1-2 light neutrals, plus 2-3 accent colors that go with your neutrals. (For example, my darks are black and navy, lights are white and light gray, and accents are shades of blue from pale aqua to gray-blue to deep blue-green.) 

Lay out all your clothes on the bed that are in the neutrals and accents you picked out and then look at what outfits you can make with those. So, using the example colors above, black pants & skirts in a pile, then navy pants & skirts in a pile, then white or gray pants, etc. Then above them lay out the cardigans/blazers/jackets in those colors. Put shoes and sandals on the floor below each pile of that color. Then take your tops and see how many outfits you can make.

After that it should be pretty clear where the "holes" are in your capsule wardrobe. Fill in the basics first — need a really good, nice-fitting pair of jeans in black or dark indigo? Need a nice fitted white tee or pretty white blouse? If all your basics are solid, add some print tops or scarves that include several of your chosen colors. Or maybe you have lots of dressy clothes and lots of around-the-house sweats & hoodies, but not much in the middle, so think about what you can add to what you have to create some nice-casual outfits, like a pair of nicer pants that will go with existing tops, or a really nice sweater that will dress up your jeans or chinos. And don't forget accessories — a nice belt, scarf, and/or handbag can make an otherwise boring, plain, solid color outfit look really polished & put together.

If you want to get some ideas of what capsule wardrobes in different colors could look like and how to put outfits together, google capsule wardrobe + whatever colors you want to see, or search for "Project 333" images. The Vivienne Files website (which I first heard about here on the board) has lots of different capsule wardrobe examples; most of them are smaller (like a travel capsule wardrobe that you can make 10-12 different outfits with), but she also does some Project 333 wardrobes, and it's easy to see how adding a few more neutral or white pieces + accessories could expand the limited capsules to a full wardrobe.

Project 333 is a thing where you limit your wardrobe to a total of 33 pieces for 3 months. She counts all shoes and accessories in that 33, but you also get 4 different 33-piece capsules (1 for each season). I don't follow that, but it's a good way to get an idea of what other people's capsules wardrobes look like in different colors.

My capsule wardrobe is ~35 pieces total, counting all summer and winter clothes, from nice-casual to dressy, not counting accessories or winter coats. That also doesn't count workout wear and around-the house clothes, which is several pairs of leggings/joggers and some old Tee Fury tees, plus 2 oversized flannel shirts and 2 hoodies for winter.

Here are some examples from The Vivienne Files (she often starts with a scarf or piece of art for the colors):

Thanks for that great info. I know I've asked about this here before yet I can't ever figure it out. I settle too often for things I just like because I don't like shopping, limited budget, and I can't find things I love so I just finally give up- rinse and repeat. 

I tend to stick to all neutrals. I like black, navy, olive green, gray, and white/off-white. I have a hard time with accents but I do like earth tones.

2 hours ago, prairiewindmomma said:

Depending on your size and shape, you may need to be replacing bras every 6-12 months. A properly fitted bra is doing a lot of supportive work, and elastics and such wear out. For me, a bra is probably the most important piece of clothing that I wear as it determines a large amount of how I fit under my clothing. 
 

First, go get properly fitted to know your proper size. Most people end up in the wrong band size. Once you have that sorted, watch sales or go hit the racks at TJMaxx. Buy at least two good bras so that you can handwash and let stuff dry overnight as needed.

Beyond that, depending on your shape, you might also benefit from shape wear under your clothes. I do. My abdominal ligaments were damaged in pregnancy and no longer hold me together.

After you have your proper foundation garments, then think about what you want to buy. I would thrift relentlessly and only buy perfection. Or, I would focus on one stellar outfit with components that you can use to bridge to other outfits: blazer, scoop shirt, trousers. You could later add skirt or leggings or dress.

I have measured myself folllowing bra fitting guidelines online but I'm sure it would be good to get properly fitted. I don't care to wear shapewear as long as my clothes fit well and are a good cut. I was hoping if I spent more on bras I might be able to get them to last longer.  

8 hours ago, Bambam said:

I find that good quality undergarments that fit and are comfortable are most important to me. If that part feels good, it helps the rest of the outfit be okay. Not supportive/staying up/falling down undergarments just bother me all the day long, so I vote for spending a little money first on those things. I buy one bra at time, handwash/hang dry, wait until another sale, buy another until I have enough to last a week. 

As for outside clothing, I tend to prefer thrift shops. You can try on a variety of brands of whatever until you find one (or hopefully more!) that fits and is comfortable. 

I love thrift shopping but when looking for something specific it's not the best where I live. In the past, I've spent years looking before giving up. However,  I was thinking of looking at online resale shops once I have an idea of what I'm looking for to see if I can find any good deals.

8 hours ago, fairfarmhand said:

I know it’s a way off but I’ve found excellent sales on undergarments on Black Friday. I buy all that me and my girls need then for the whole year.

You know it's only 2 months away at this point, good point!

[prairiewindmomma]

The best bra isn’t necessarily the most expensive one.  Midrange bras often have quality elastics and construction. I pick up Soma bras on sale because the Soma underwire construction is good and the width of the back and side is what I need. But, one of my kids has terrible fit with Soma and wears Warner bras instead. 
 

Elastics just tend to wear out. https://www.realsimple.com/beauty-fashion/shoes-accessories/lingerie-hosiery/when-to-buy-new-bra

[elegantlion]

I don't know about bras. I tend to buy Hanes from Amazon. As for clothing, I've been working on replacing the less than great fabrics in my wardrobe. I can't wear wool at all, but I try to stay with linen & cotton. I like the hang of a fabric as much as the style. 

 

[KungFuPanda]

I love how @Corraleno spelled it all out. I’d take her plan and shop first in your closet, then at goodwill, then somewhere like tj max and lastly at a full priced store. You can probably get most of what you need before you have to think about paying full price for anything. Also, the benefit of goodwill is they have so many different brands and you know how they’ll wash up. 

[Soror]

I appreciate all the thoughts.

I measured myself again for bras. I know. I know I should get measured but if I go into some place that does measurement I will feel like I have to buy something there and I just don't want to mess with it. Then I remembered why I have a hard time with bras my size is impossible to find locally- 30/32 DD. That's why I always end up settling for a sister size that kinda sorta fits. I looked on Amazon for well-reviewed bras and have some coming.

I brutally went through my closet again. I looked at inspiration. It looks like for my dark neutrals I'm leaning towards navy and olive green and for light ones- white/beige and light gray. I realized I used to have a lot of black but when I look in my closet now I only have a few black things. For accents I'm looking at jewel tones in a burgundy/rust shade. I don't like pink or red. I actually don't like any pastels. I've got more olive-toned skin with hazel eyes and dark brown hair.

I found a pair of olive green pants at Penney's that I loved but when I wore them around the house more they started to get a little loose- the drawback of the stretchy material in the pants. I loved the way they fit me. I think I'll take them back for a smaller size but I'm worried they will end up too stretchy after wear too. 

I'm trying to find a pair of well-fitting straight-legged blue jeans. I also want some in a boyfriend cut. I have some boyfriend cut I bought years ago but they've always been a bit big and even now up a few pounds they are still bigger than I like. I just haven't got rid of them because I haven't found any I like better.

I'm looking at flats. I'd like a neutral white pair and one in some color. I have an idea of short boots that I want but I think I'll aim for those for Christmas. It is rarely cold before then anyway.

-----------------

eta I generally love shopping in thrift stores- but I live in a smaller town (pop 16 k) so choices are limited. Also, Goodwill (only 1 locally) keeps raising prices and it is cheaper to buy plain basics at places like Wal-Mart or TJ Maxx instead of there. Sometimes you might find a deal on a name-brand piece but usually, they mark them up so much you are better off shopping thrift online. If I can figure out some pieces that I want I'm going to have dd help me shop second-hand online. She is a pro at finding things. I've been eyeing some Lululemon joggers for ages now and I think I'll have her hunt for some in my size. I had a pair from Target that I loved but they've gotten some wear and don't fit as well anymore.

 

Edited September 23, 2023 by Soror

[mmasc]

If you need some good, basic sweaters these are amazing, imho. They’re at Costco, but I can’t tell if they’re an item you can buy online without a membership or not. In warehouse, they’re $14.99, so the online price is still very good.  I bought one last year, and quickly went back for two more in different colors. This year, they’ve brought them back in 3 colors. The “red” is more of a rust and the “green” is a perfect jewel-tone jade.

[Brittany1116]

I don't know the complete size range, but I saw the sale on Pink bras today and was surprised to find one I loved in store.