How old when you stop reminding...

[AndyJoy]

In those conditions I check/remind anyone riding in my car, including adults. I have reminded my parents before. No one has to wear them to and from the car, but the coats/hats/gloves/emergency blankets come with us. DH grew up in Alaska, and he doesn't mess around with hypothermia. The school bus company policy was to not let a child on the bus unless they had weather-appropriate gear. If you end up in a ditch or stranded with a disabled car, mild discomfort can turn dangerous quickly. We don't trust our trips to always go as planned, so we prepare for it.

 

 

I'm not the chase-with-a-coat type in most situations. Generally I think kids above toddler age can tell when they need a coat. When I was pregnant with my first and temporary guardian to a 16-year-old for the summer, I got a "you'll understand when you have kids" pat on the head from (what I considered) a hovering always-cold-herself mom. We were camping and it was 58-60℉ during the day. The preteen/teen boys spent all day chasing one another around the woods right by our campsite, sweat dripping from their foreheads and likely their stinky boy pits ;). And she spent all day trying to force her 12, 14, and 16-year-old boys to don coats. They basically ignored her. She was horrified that I didn't make the 16-year-old with me put on long pants. I assured her he had the brains to put them on when needed. She was condescending and said I'd understand later. I assured her I would trust my future (typically developing) 5-6 year old in this situation. She scoffed. I smirked. The dads who were amusedly listening in told me they where on my side. My kid is 7 and I was right ;).

 

But that was 60℉, not 10. And they had access to coats if needed.

Edited January 15, 2017 by AndyJoy

[foxbridgeacademy]

I remind/mention to DH that he might want a coat before he leaves the house.  I'll also ask "how cold is it?" even though I know the temp, hoping to spur them to think about a coat.  But kids were 11-12ish when I stopped insisting they wear a coat and about 13-14 when I stopped making them at least bring their coat.

[Carrie12345]

My 13yo forgot her coat at our dojo last week, while temps were in the teens.  TEENS!

 

My 39yo (har har) went out the other night and told me later how he probably should've brought a coat.  It was in the high 20s, and he was wandering around (far from home) in a sweatshirt.

 

In a way, I get it. I hate coats.  I try to avoid wearing one.  But I always have one with me, and I try to keep tabs on everyone else's.  Car accidents happen (frequently here) as do other unplanned events.  I try to make sure everyone has a coat in the car, decent walking shoes if anyone isn't already wearing them (that's usually me,) hats and gloves, and I keep blankets stashed under a seat. And I need to restock hand warmers, since "someone" was playing with them and now I don't have enough to go around.

 

I'll tell my 14yo she's insane for taking the dog out in shorts and a t-shirt without demanding she put on a coat, but it's an entirely different story when we're out and about and could be miles (or even just one) from heat if something happens.

[SparklyUnicorn]

I make everyone, including dh, take coats everywhere in winter in case of car trouble or impromptu stops.

 

So forever is my answer.

 

I did this with my DH recently.  When we go to the gym he often doesn't take a coat.  Now sure it's really close by and it's a matter of walking to and from the car.  But I said, what if something happened and the car broke down.  You'd be without a coat and freeze!  Ya just never know.

[Guest]

As long as they're my responsibility I will remind them.

 

If I remember myself :)

Yes, this. If it's a situation where the kid will be cold for a short while, and is insistent he doesn't need a coat, I may let him find out he's wrong. I have also brought along warmer gear in the car, so he will have the opportunity to choose better. (I say 'he' because this issue never cropped up with my girl.)But if it's just giving my kid information about expected weather that I have and they may not, I do this even when they are 19 and 17. I say, "You're going to want a jacket; the wind is much colder than the air temp,) or something.

 

DH is even likely to give me info like this if he has been out in the morning and I haven't yet. NBD.

[Guest]

Well when my kids insist they don't need a coat but I know they do, I just have them throw them in the back. "OK Bud, you aren't cold now, but you might need it later so put it in the trunk." They're always amenable AND they sit there and shiver, getting the natural consequences. Best of both worlds, I think.

 

DH's issue is that he looks at the weather report on his phone instead of stepping outside. It just doesn't translate well sometime, yanno?

[ktgrok]

I was 37 last week and my mother still nags me about wearing coats. 

 

 

 

 

Yes, I'm 40 and my mother still reminds me. 

[Sarah CB]

It's -11 out right now - which, I think, is about 12 degrees F. My 14 year old will not wear a coat. He was helping us move boxes from one house to another yesterday and did not wear a coat or gloves. I have given up.

 

Last year, I made them at least leave the house with a coat. They didn't have to wear it, but they had to bring it with them. This year - whatever. If they want to freeze, they can freeze.

 

I do still make my 11 year old wear his coat. 

 

So, I guess my answer is that when a stubborn kid reaches his mid-teens I save my own sanity by letting him choose whether he wants to freeze or not and I stop worrying about it.

[AmandaVT]

I make everyone, including dh, take coats everywhere in winter in case of car trouble or impromptu stops.

 

So forever is my answer.

Yup - I still remind DH and he reminds me. I've had multiple friends get stuck on the Interstate for hours during a snow/ice event. Cars get cold very quickly and more often than not, there is no place to walk to if you get stuck on the interstate. You'd have to walk miles. 

 

I tell DS that he doesn't have to wear the coat, but he needs to bring it. 

[Bluegoat]

It really depends for us.  I'm generaly willing to let them learn for themselves, but if they will not be able to get to the things they will need later, I remind them - fostbite and frozen feet are serious.  And the age isn't similar for all my kids.  Plus, my eldest girl used to remember, but now avoids taking things because it is uncool.  I am very tempted to let her be cold, but when it is -10 I can't bring myself to do it, she has a 20 min walk to school.

[DawnM]

A coat to wear outside to play in the yard - they can figure that out. If it is in the single digits, or even below 30 degrees, they will be back inside very soon.

 

A coat when we are going somewhere - we always have winter gear with us and I still give reminders at ten and twelve as weather can change and you never know if you will get stuck, need to walk somewhere, etc. If we are walking from a parking lot to a building I let them decide whether they wear their gear.

 

I wouldn't bother reminding.  At that point, it is about safety, just like wearing a seatbelt.

"We will not leave until you have a coat,"  Or, "If you don't 'have a coat by the time we need to leave, we are leaving you."  Or whatever......it is a RULE and you must do it or there are consequences, whatever those happen to be for your family.

[theelfqueen]

We always park in the garage so our car is warm when we leave... I tend to have the remind the kids that it won't be warm when we come back out from where we are going... even now.

 

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk

[1GirlTwinBoys]

My boys are 12 and DD 13 and I still remind them to grab their coat.  

[Um_2_4]

It doesn't even get that cold here and I still remind DH (because he coughs if he gets chilly, leftover ever since he had a bad case of pneumonia) and dd10 because she gets cold when no one else is (like a/c in the car if it is below 75F outside). They are the only 2 to actually own "winter" coats. Everyone else I keep a light jacket and change of clothes in the car. (My kids are all known for car sickness  :glare: .)

[lllll]

nm 

 

Edited January 19, 2017 by .qp_

[Seeking Squirrels]

They are 8 & 4 and I say something every time. Even for the 4yo when we are just going to be in the car dropping off DD8. My husband's car recently broke down out of nowhere and he was stranded til I could get to him. So I insist even 4yo takes her coat even though she never wears it just in case something happens and we find ourselves walking. I think a coat is easy for a kid to forget when they've been in a warm house and they only have to go into the garage and into a car. But then I have an 8yo with memory issues and I have to still remind her of every step getting ready for bed. 

[gardenmom5]

it isn't the age - it's the responsibility level.

 

if they remember - I don't remind. if I remind and they refused, I will put one in the car.  (especially for younger kids.  teens, not so much.)   I have many arguments with dudeling "I dont' care if he doesn't want a coat, he has to bring one."

I had arguments with 2ds that he had to have a coat/sweater.  he'd wear shorts and flip-flops when it was below freezing.  he's leave the coat/sweater on the playground.

 

 

eta: kids don't have the experience to understand temperature, and what it will do to them.  you can tell them it's cold - but that doesn't mean a lot unless they deal with wide temperature variations frequently.

Edited January 16, 2017 by gardenmom5

[TheReader]

I still remind my family. I always will. I usually let them know the weather, they can decide from there.

 

This, exactly. 

 

our weather is wonky. We had 22 and 72 (and higher) in the same week last week. So, I tell the kids, "hey, it's cold today, you might want a jacket..." and let them choose. Or, if I know it's going to be vastly different when they or we return than it is when we leave, I let them know that. For example, a few weeks ago, we had a day where the high for the day was the morning temperature, and by afternoon it was around 30 degrees colder. So, my college kid who left in the morning but didn't return until afternoon, I made sure he knew it would do that so he wasn't caught off guard. 

 

But, if they step outside and feel okay, I don't force it. We don't have actual dangerously cold weather here, and I'm always colder than they are, so if they say they aren't, I believe them. 

 

Still....their my babies. I'll never quit reminding them. Heck, my MIL still calls us to tell us to wrap the pipes, cover the plants, etc. and while it makes me laugh, it also makes me smile. She loves her boy, and loves us, and this is just how she shows it (and I've realized, I'm just like her). 

[EmmaNZ]

and he may be sent outside during his shift as a cashier if they need help shagging carriages.

Wow, that's a really rude word here in this part of the world! I had no idea people used it in normal life 😎