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Do your kids fight more when they spend more time together?


JumpyTheFrog
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Mine are similar ages 10 and 8, and it cycles. They play great together most of the time, but we have patches when they fuss and fight. 

Ds is an extrovert and Dd needs some time alone and doesn't play tackle so they inevitably conflict at times, especially when they are tired.

 

I start making them go to bed a bit earlier and maintain some afternoon quiet time when it gets yucky. A day away, playing with a friend also helps.

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My kids are almost always together.  Literally.  Right now they are sleeping together, by choice.  :)

 

They are most likely to fight if there is a feeling of competing for adults' attention or approval.  When they are alone together, they rarely fight and when they do, they negotiate their way back to peace.

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When they were 10 and 8 they would fuss sometimes because they both wanted to have things their way when they played pretend.  They get along great now the more time they spend together (playing Dungeons and Dragons which is just the big kid version of pretend, IMO). I think it really helps that they have some interests in common but also have some of their own that sibling isn't involved with.

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My kids are almost always together.  Literally.  Right now they are sleeping together, by choice.  :)

 

They are most likely to fight if there is a feeling of competing for adults' attention or approval.  When they are alone together, they rarely fight and when they do, they negotiate their way back to peace.

 

Mine are similar. They are also always together. They don't like being apart. They don't fight. 

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Mine get along better when they are not competing for adult attention, much like SKL said. Also, they get along better when neither is having to compete with a third party for the other's attention--such as a neighborhood friend. With the 7 year age gap this is not as great a problem as it could be.

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Mine play together great in the morning, but the afternoon can see them butting heads a lot.  Generally they just need a little space from each other.  For us about an hour of quiet time/ time apart seems to reset their moods and willing to cooperate with one another.  The best fix is to go play outside but the weather isn't always cooperative.  They can seemingly play outside together great with minimal fighting or they each get involved doing their own thing outside.

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