Struggling with grade acceleration

[Love2learn!]

Sorry so long.........

 

We have a 6 year old who loves, loves numbers and always has.  During his K year, the teacher provided challenge and he was given grade 1 math curriculum.  This wasn't enough challenge, however, she did some other things to keep him busy.  Since we were at a STEM magnet school he had other really enjoyable things like planetarium, math lab, computer lab, etc...for specials. In addition, this school does a lot of special things in K.  So he had a good year.

 

We moved to another part of the state to a high performing school district and enrolled in the local school.  When we approached the 1st grade teacher with the letter from his old teacher and end of year math test for grade 1 (it is for the same curriculum and he passed it with a 100%) and asked for more challenge for him, we were met with resistance.  A decision was made to give it 6 weeks while she assessed, etc...  Even though we were just asking for math acceleration, administration assessed him globally....which was fine.  He was given the Iowa Acceleration Scale and his scores fell into the category of Excellent Candidate for Acceleration. The psychologist remarked that he was doing impressive mental math....partial product in his head and doing math like a 4th grader.  It was a relief to hear that someone else saw it and recognized it.  It's not us drilling math facts into in.  Based on this they all recommended acceleration to 2nd grade with a teacher who does things very out of the box.  We agreed.

 

Unfortunately, the result has not been what we had hoped.  He is struggling with writing, which is the one area that he tested average in and we knew he would need support in.  The teacher does not seem to be doing anything different to help him transition.  He is having a hard time completing assignments and then has to stay in for recess because of it.  He says he doesn't always understand what to do and when he asks, he is not being helped.  In addition, they seem to do a great deal of their work on the computer and there is lots of phonics drill.  He is actually doing quite well memorizing all the rules, however, I don't see anything fun going on with reading.  He had to type a paragraph out the other day in order to make grammatical corrections to it for an assignment.  This was not easy for him.  As a 6 year old he is not a skilled typist.  When we had a meeting after the first two weeks, it was obvious that the teacher was not fully briefed on him, which was disappointing.  In addition, we were asked to back off and put ownership on him to figure things out.  He comes home exhausted and unable to engage in homework until it's bedtime.  It's like he needs that long to decompress from the day.  The other night he sobbed to sleep...which broke my heart.  He was too tired to complete an assignment, but was afraid to not have it done...even though I told him it was okay.  This child loves to learn, used to like school, is not a behavior problem, loves to be a teacher helper......and on top of it all he is not getting the math challenge he wants.....which was the whole reason we ended up in this position.  

 

We are going to have a meeting next week.  However, I feel that if this is just the way the teacher teaches.......very accelerated and computer heavy, then it's not going to be a good fit for our gifted yet only 6 year old 2nd grader who loves math, geography, reading, painting and talking about interesting things.  We were so....excited about this opportunity, as was he...I feel like we set him up for failure.  He is sad about school and asking to come home.....and we are considering it.  Has anyone else, been in this type of situation before?  Thanks for reading this long message.

 

 

[kalusignan]

:grouphug:

 

Sorry to hear things aren't going as expected! I don't have direct experience with this type of situation, but you might consider cross-posting in the accelerated learners board. I'm sure there are many there with a similar experience. Asynchronous development is normal, but also makes it really hard to 'fit in' to the graded system in brick and mortar schools, so many decide to homeschool for that reason.

 

Hope you find the answers and support you're looking for!

[Arcadia]

Is he given an official grade skip or just moved into a 2nd grade classroom. When my oldest was offered a grade skip in public school, his writing and LA was at least a grade ahead. They did not offer a grade skip for my youngest until he catch up on writing being a grade ahead, his grammar and reading were way ahead.

 

If he wasn't given an official grade skip, ask for a customised education plan. It is going to take a long time and depending on your state's laws on gifted program it may be tough to get accommodations.

 

We had to switch to our state's K12 VA to get a customised plan for both kids. When we tried to switch back to B&M because oldest wants to be back, grade skip was offered again. It is the cheapest solution to the school and the easiest for them to implement. My district is average with an inverted bell curve so the high performing kids are capable of handling a grade skip.

 

ETA:

Some schools have mixed grade classrooms so it is easier to be at the lower grade for English and higher grade for math. If your child is two or more grades ahead in math, be prepared that the accommodation might be doing EPGY or ALEKS math on computer during his math lessons. The K-5 kids in my son's B&M public school does not have math at the same time so it is hard to go to another classroom for math. The 6-8 kids have a totally different bell schedule so even though the school is K-8, it would be hard for a 3rd or 4th grader to go to a 6th grade math class for example. K-3 was very relaxed and hands on at that school so my oldest loved it.

 

ETA:

Oldest entered public school K at 4yrs 8mths. He just meet the December birthday cutoff. His K and 1st grade teachers told me that homeschool would be the best option. I don't know anyone with a gIEP in my district.

Edited December 11, 2015 by Arcadia

[SKL]

Could you work on teaching him typing, so it isn't so time-consuming for him?  It would also be easier/quicker than writing everything out with pencil.

 

Would it help to do some of the homework in the morning before school?  Could he do some in advance over the weekend?

 

In the meeting, I hope they will agree to give him some accommodations on writing.  I don't know what to say about reading, other than try to have fun with it at home.

 

Curious, when is his birthday?

[Bluegoat]

I think this is a common reason that parents will try homeschooling.  Many teachers and schools don't do well with this kind of situation, and to be fair, they aren't well designed for it.  It's very unfair IMO to expect kids who are more developed in some areas to suddenly perform ahead in all of them.

 

I would personally be really unhappy that they have them typing any amount for assignments in grade 2, even with a child who hasn't been put ahead.

 

You mention that you knew he would need support for writing.  Was the idea that it would be coming from the classroom, or was the expectation that you would support that?

[Tsuga]

This is exactly why our schools will do almost anything other than accelerate and why you must be ahead in ALL areas to advance to the gifted program.

 

With my girls, we after school so I can work. Like many of their peers, they are between one and six grade levels ahead depending on the subject. I enrich homework and school homework is treated as a time trial.

 

That's all I've got. I don't know if I'd keep a kid one grade level ahead just for math, personally. I'd much sooner speed through 1st grade math homework and then do 2nd Singapore and BA for fun at home. That is what I do, actually.

[sweetpea3829]

I never did enroll my accelerated son, and the issues you are having are a large part of why. Honestly, the issues you are having are a large part of why I homeschool ALL of my kids, not just the accelerated one. At the end of the day, most classrooms are simply not equipped to handle differently abled learners.

 

Would you consider dropping him back to 1st and then after schooling him to provide acceleration? If not (and there's a good reason not to, as that may have an impact on his confidence), you may be better off bringing him home.

 

Honestly, in my humble opinion, kids like this are really better off at home where their educational needs can be met while also accommodating their maturity level.

 

Because like your son, mine is gifted at math but he would still prefer to be playing with his Legos over extra math, kwim?

[wapiti]

Personally, I don't think it's age-appropriate for most second graders to type assignments, let alone 6 year olds, and I'd expect that to be a challenge even where typing would be useful to get around handwriting difficulties.  Moreover, the ownership/backing off angle would bug me; in my world, that's better reserved for later in elementary or even middle school, depending on what they mean (and I'm even coming from a "help me do it myself" Montessori perspective).  I'm not sure I'd like that classroom for grade-level kids, much less a grade skipper.  It boils down to a poor fit.

Edited January 12, 2016 by wapiti

[kiwik]

What is this huge desire for little kids to "own their own learning" and do everything for themselves? You can't own your own learning unless you are free to quit and it is me that has to replace lost items not my kids.

[Arcadia]

At what grade level does your state do state testing? My oldest would had to take the annual state test for the level he was grade skipped to if we (parent) approved it. Since state testing is on computers/laptops, kids need to type their answers. The "gamers" were fast typists and mouse clickers.

 

ETA:

Can't figure out why the high volume of typing other than state testing.

Edited December 12, 2015 by Arcadia

[debi21]

We can relate. I have a six year old, too, in 1st grade. He is not accelerated a full year, but his school groups for math and reading. He is in with second graders doing Saxon 3 for Math (and this still seems too easy for him) but we are having no problems there. However, he is in with third graders doing what I think is a fourth grade text for reading. I didn't anticipate how much writing would be required for reading, given that writing is taught separately in the 1st grade homeroom. The thing is, I can see in the reading comprehension worksheets that this is exactly the right level to challenge him. The first time I have actually seen the "Zone of Proximal Development." But every night he had to write a paragraph plus the two sided worksheet for homework. Then, in November they added answering five comprehension questions in writing on top of the paragraph and worksheet. I rebelled and "fought" with the teacher. I wanted him to submit the questions and paragraph work typed - so he was writing it or at least composing it himself, but not having to do all the physical writing. Instead, he was allowed to write one sentence in addition to the five questions instead of the full four sentence paragraph. It's something I guess. I am scared because we need to reevaluate in January; plus, in one assignment this week, they were asked to write an essay for homework instead of a paragraph. Yikes! He, like your son, has a perpetual fear of being held in from recess if he doesn't complete his work.

 

I also feel like I have let him down. I wonder if he wouldn't have been better off not accelerating. It has made me yearn the last two months to bring him home and homeschool, but it isn't feasible for us right now. Plus, this school's curriculum is so not in agreement with what I would have chosen for him (heavy on busywork). If it would work, I would love to be homeschooling him. The only other thing is that we had a terrible period of 2-3 weeks with a lot of sobbing and tantrums and not wanting to go to school - we made a concerted effort to move his bedtime up and he is doing somewhat better with a little more sleep. I don't know what to do either - he wants to stay at this school, but I am thinking of moving him to the gifted magnet when it starts in 3rd grade if homeschool continues to not be an option. The last thing I will say is that I don't believe in letting a six year old handle schoolwork on his own at this age. I scaffold as much as he needs for homework, and if your son needs writing support, I would try to work on that with him after school. This might improve his attitude or confidence if he knows he has help at home, at least. I hope your meeting goes well.

 

[Jackie]

I'm so sorry it's going so rough for your son!

 

Honestly, this is pretty much why we're homeschooling. (You had to expect that, given you asked on a homeschooling forum, right?) My daughter is quite advanced on math and reading, but average on her fine motor. Her ability to handle input for content subjects is well above age-grade, but her ability to produce output isn't. There was not going to be an appropriate "grade level" for her.

[Targhee]

I'm sorry :-(

 

I know a little bit of the stress. Dd was accelerated 1 year in 1st, still way ahead in writing and math skills but lagging in fine motor and therefore writing. It was a tough year for her, and her teacher (who was a veteran but not necessarily an out of the box thinker) was of no help with her struggle OR the fact that she was still ahead of everyone else in reading and math.

 

After many tearful days, the year finally ended and we moved. We put her in a Spanish immersion school, which gave her some challenge at least, and even differentiated for her. But they failed to see a LD because her gifts were enough to compensate.

 

Two years and we moved again, and this time we chose homeschool. It has made an enormous difference. We are able to give appropriate challenge in each area, just enough to require effort but still allow her to feel success.

 

She's in 8th grade, and though we still had some learning ability/disability discoveries to make after leaving public school I think we are in a good place.

 

It's hard when your kid doesn't fit the mold - accelerated here, average there - and skipping a grade can help and hurt. Above I think it is important to develop a positive association with school, so I think if homeschool is not an option I would ask to put him back in 1st and have him pulled out to do accelerated math (or whatever else he needs acceleration in) with 2nd grade. Best wishes!

[Hunter]

If you cannot homeschool, I would bump him back to first. The math in 2nd still isn't enough, right, so what is being gained?

[ElizabethB]

While you are figuring out what to do long term, Read Write, Type works on both phonics and spelling and typing and is fun, that could help with the typing problem.

 

http://www.talkingfingers.com

Edited December 13, 2015 by ElizabethB

[kiwik]

We can relate. I have a six year old, too, in 1st grade. He is not accelerated a full year, but his school groups for math and reading. He is in with second graders doing Saxon 3 for Math (and this still seems too easy for him) but we are having no problems there. However, he is in with third graders doing what I think is a fourth grade text for reading. I didn't anticipate how much writing would be required for reading, given that writing is taught separately in the 1st grade homeroom. The thing is, I can see in the reading comprehension worksheets that this is exactly the right level to challenge him. The first time I have actually seen the "Zone of Proximal Development." But every night he had to write a paragraph plus the two sided worksheet for homework. Then, in November they added answering five comprehension questions in writing on top of the paragraph and worksheet. I rebelled and "fought" with the teacher. I wanted him to submit the questions and paragraph work typed - so he was writing it or at least composing it himself, but not having to do all the physical writing. Instead, he was allowed to write one sentence in addition to the five questions instead of the full four sentence paragraph. It's something I guess. I am scared because we need to reevaluate in January; plus, in one assignment this week, they were asked to write an essay for homework instead of a paragraph. Yikes! He, like your son, has a perpetual fear of being held in from recess if he doesn't complete his work.

 

I also feel like I have let him down. I wonder if he wouldn't have been better off not accelerating. It has made me yearn the last two months to bring him home and homeschool, but it isn't feasible for us right now. Plus, this school's curriculum is so not in agreement with what I would have chosen for him (heavy on busywork). If it would work, I would love to be homeschooling him. The only other thing is that we had a terrible period of 2-3 weeks with a lot of sobbing and tantrums and not wanting to go to school - we made a concerted effort to move his bedtime up and he is doing somewhat better with a little more sleep. I don't know what to do either - he wants to stay at this school, but I am thinking of moving him to the gifted magnet when it starts in 3rd grade if homeschool continues to not be an option. The last thing I will say is that I don't believe in letting a six year old handle schoolwork on his own at this age. I scaffold as much as he needs for homework, and if your son needs writing support, I would try to work on that with him after school. This might improve his attitude or confidence if he knows he has help at home, at least. I hope your meeting goes well.

That sounds like too much homework.for the non accelerated kids as well.

[SparklyUnicorn]

Is the issue with writing a content thing or the physical demands of writing?

 

 

[SparklyUnicorn]

It sounds like its the school or particular classroom, not the skip. Too much inappropriate busywork, not enough psych support, punishment for developmental reasons, placement not by instructional need, and no enrichment.

 

Could you give an example of things he has to figure out, but doesnt feel the directions are sufficient? Usually when that happened here, it was a case of missing instruction, and the child wasnt able to catch up on his own.

 

Yep, yep, and yep.

 

And I can't help but wonder if there isn't a bit of retaliation going on.  I can't possibly know that, but I wonder.

[quark]

Yes, this is almost exactly why we started homeschooling. My son didn't sob himself to sleep but stopped sleeping and eating well and became a different person altogether. He is still, as a teen highly asynchronous but was SO much more asynchronous when younger. He is also highly conscientious and was heading towards depression due to this and other factors when we pulled him out.

 

He is also a numbers kid (my signature explains how non traditional we've had to be with him) who has trouble with fine motor and coordination but these have improved with age and I strongly feel the improvement is BECAUSE we brought him home and set him up for success.

 

By homeschooling, he could do all the math he wanted to do and slow down as much as he needed to with writing. We could use music lessons to help with his finger strength. We could use child-directed inquiry to help him learn to type (he learned to type by googling for keywords in areas of interest).

 

If it was just a matter of typing difficulty, you could undo grade acceleration but often, what is not clear is how ahead some of these kids are in some domains and the difference just grows with age. As a first grader for example, his math might be at 4th grade level but once he reaches 3rd grade, don't be surprised if his math learning spikes to 8th grade level or higher. Learning with these kids, especially when they love to learn, is often not linear and holding kids back just because they can't write or type now can lead to a lot more frustration later.

 

Hugs. He shouldn't have to sob himself to sleep like that. It's heartbreaking.

[MomOfABunch]

My oldest DS was like this. He also skipped 1st grade. We tried public school, private school, K12 online, public school gifted programs, etc. None of it worked for him. I ended up with a grumpy kid who was starting to hate school and get into trouble. K12 was an improvement over B&M school and doing that I realized what he needed was for his courses to be self paced. Especially math. After K12, he started AoPS for math and has thrived. This year, age wise, he is in 8th grade doing Pre-Calc. His reading and writing are good, but not so accelerated. He's working through WWS and the WTM reading lists.

 

I feel your frustration. It's hard when the school is making your kids education difficult.

[MomOfABunch]

Is Montessori school an option?

[Love2learn!]

Thanks everyone for the amazing input.  I appreciate all the suggestions and am saddened by how many of you have experienced similar issues with your children.  It's heartbreaking.

 

He does have an official grade skip and I'm afraid of what it would do to his confidence to go back to first grade, at least at that school.  All of the testing indicates that he has the tools for second.  However, it appears that the model, is not a good fit for him and I would much rather he be back in first with a great teacher and receiving math acceleration.  Especially since we are in a high performing district that seems to accelerate things in preparation for what is coming.  I suspect that all the computer work is preparation for standardized testing that begins in grade 3.    

 

Part of the initial issue was that his first grade teacher was not being supportive either.  She questioned the need for math acceleration even though he came in to the school having been tested and then the Iowa Acceleration Scale and tests clearly showed that he was way beyond level in math.  In the first week, she asked what math was and he answered 7 x 5 = 35 (he loves multiplication) and she told him they do not do that in first grade.  He came home dejected.  He had two bathroom accidents in one week....he was humiliated.  They were not allowed to have a snack, even though the other classes did....that eventually changed. There were also other incidents that clearly showed some passive aggressive things going on.  He was coming home saying that he was not good at this and that and just not happy.  We were not willing to stay with that teacher for the rest of the year.  And because they painted such a great picture of the new teacher, we went with it.  

 

Unfortunately, he is expected to do lots of work independently.  They do lots of work on the computer.  They do quite a bit of writing......even the reading comprehension passages, require answers in full sentences. While he does not struggle with the physical part of writing, he did not have a year's worth of practicing writing sentences and paragraphs and is now being expected to do it, without much support.  Some of the assignments I've seen have 2 pages front and back of reading and then two pages of questions.  This is just too much for him to do on his own.  His reading is on level, however, he is still learning to pick state main idea of a passage when it's entirely on his own vs. choosing from answers.  He wants to just tell me all the details, summarizing is hard.  I know that some of this is developmental.  I am trying to help him at home, however, he is exhausted at the end of the school day and doesn't want to do too much.  And then he wants to do math at 8pm!!

 

We specifically asked what we could do to help and we were told nothing, that he would be fine.  We know that he is not fine.  I feel like he is doing school under stress and constantly worried about having recess pulled from him.  They probably have no idea because he is a teacher pleaser, but the stress is very real for him.  We are new to the school and had we known that the class worked like this we wouldn't have done it.....  We are waiting to hear back regarding a meeting to discuss how things are going.  At this point, I don't even know what to hope for.  Thanks again for all the suggestions.  

[Hunter]

I'm so sorry this is happening to you.

 

If public school is a must, I recommend denying that a parent thinks their child is gifted, and just keep them at typical grade level. And then afterschool. The less work that is required at school the more time and energy a child has to afterschool.

 

I have found that teachers often try to punish gifted kids.

 

Also the curriculum at many schools is just developmentally inappropriate. A grade skipped child is more likely to meet developmentally inappropriate expectations than a not grade skipped child.

 

Being a little ahead is a plus when thrown into hell. Are all public school classes hell? No! But, and this is a big but, I have never met anyone who graduated K-12 that doesn't have some horror stories.

 

My mom was grade skipped. She made them keep me at grade level, because I fell apart when accelerated to what my test scores said I could handle. We moved a lot. Even internationally. My parents had substance abuse problems and usually were not able to help with school issues at all. I needed every last bit of being ahead to tackle the realities, negligence, and downright abuse I suffered at school.

 

My best years were spent in remedial classes. I kid you not. I was ignored, and I was a natural unschooler who took advantage of all the free time. For years people forgot I showed up in this country "ahead" and just dumped me in the classes set aside for kids from the welfare slums. I was happier there. Being ignored is better than being a target.

 

I had to pull my youngest out in 5th grade. I thought I could advocate for him, and made things worse. After I made it impossible for him to hide, I had to pull him.

 

I think homeschooling was the best option. But if I had to keep a kid in PS, and I had to do it all over again, I would refuse to admit I thought my kid was gifted, even when they showed me their own test results. I'd play dumb. "Yes, he enjoys math." Giggle. "Isn't that adorable?" When talking to them, I would refer to what we did at home as "play".

Edited December 16, 2015 by Hunter

[Love2learn!]

Oh my goodness Hunter........your note struck a chord with me.  This is absolutely what I feel we have done.  Put a target on his back.  That expresses it so accurately.  :(

 

I do feel he is being asked to do things that are not developmentally appropriate.  We also thought we could advocate for him and it feels like we made things much worse.  I'm worried about what we are affecting in the long term.  While homeschooling is not ideal for us financially, it may be something that we have to strongly consider now.  I am tired of having this awful feeling in my stomach.

 

 

[HomeAgain]

Homeschooling is cheaper than therapy.

[bakpak]

Is there another 2nd grade teacher who might be a better fit for him? A lot of it sounds like teacher-specific issues. 

 

How is he fitting in socially in the classroom with the other students?

 

Hugs!

 

[Arcadia]

Since yours is a high performing school, test prep probably started in 2nd grade. Also other parents who are envious might be the ones causing issues.

 

I do know someone in one of the top performing school in the state whose kid was grade skip. His LA was easily two grade levels ahead though and his math was way ahead.

 

My DS11 was a very tall 4 year old when he started K, barely meeting birthdate cutoff. He gets mistaken for a 6 year old so he miss being targeted except by competitive parents of classmates who know his age. His teachers were actually great. His K teacher asked about parent qualifications at the first meeting and said we are better off homeschooling. I told her that I need the free babysitting since my youngest needed my attention and K was playbased. My DS11 did enjoyed public school despite boredom at times.

 

The thing with official grade skipping is that teachers tend to expect the kids to earn the grade skip. They expect that the school/district admin has decided the kid can cope with it so the grade skip child gets less leeway. Some teachers do not remember age or birthdate either. My boy's public school teachers had to check their records before they realise how young my oldest boy was, the class size is 30 though so not surprising.

 

ETA:

Have you had the first parent teacher conference? Was there goals set?

My kids had customised goals set for them during parent teacher conferences since they were K. It helped a lot since both were asynchronous but above grade level for all subjects and I didn't want a grade skip for oldest.

Edited December 16, 2015 by Arcadia

[Sahamamama]

Oh my goodness Hunter........your note struck a chord with me.  This is absolutely what I feel we have done.  Put a target on his back.  That expresses it so accurately.   :(

 

I do feel he is being asked to do things that are not developmentally appropriate.  We also thought we could advocate for him and it feels like we made things much worse.  I'm worried about what we are affecting in the long term.  While homeschooling is not ideal for us financially, it may be something that we have to strongly consider now.  I am tired of having this awful feeling in my stomach.

 

I've read the entire thread, but wanted to respond to just this part of your post. I think that in your situation, I wouldn't think of the decision as "all or nothing." Unless there are factors we don't know about here, there is really no reason to frame it that way. You could pull him this year, buy him some relief and time, then reconsider over the summer what to do year by year. It needn't be all or nothing.

 

If I were in your shoes, right now, I would pull him and homeschool him for the rest of this year. Even a part of a year can give a child the opportunity to build skills asynchronously, as well as recover from the abuses and injustices of school. (Sad, really, to think of a 1st grader being familiar with these, isn't it?)

 

But, it is what it is, you know? Since you already met resistance from the original 1st grade teacher and the 2nd grade teacher is the "sink or swim" type and the assignments are developmentally inappropriate even for non-skipped students and the level of math is still not really challenging him and the school administration doesn't seem willing to tailor anything to your child and your son has already had so many negative experiences in his short school life and you yourself are stressed by it all -- with all of that in view, I would pull him over the winter break. Just check what your state and local laws are regarding pulling out to homeschool in the middle of a school year.

 

If homeschooling really isn't feasible now, I would still think twice before returning him to 1st grade. I do think he would have a "target" on him for real then, both with the teacher(s) and with the other students. "Here comes this kid who thought -- and whose parents thought -- he was a hotshot ready for 2nd grade or more, but no, he's not able to cut it (insert mocking laughter here)." It's wrong, of course, but could happen. We all know (or should know) that the student had absolutely nothing to do with all this, he just is who he is and is capable in ways that he is capable, but... I do think that revoking the official grade skip would spell trouble, if he stays in the same school. [bTW, I want to make it clear that none of this is "your fault," either.]

 

Your only other option, besides homeschooling, is to put up with 2nd grade being what it is and this teacher being the way she is -- sink or swim. At least you could put up with it on the surface of things, but then offer all the support you can at home. I agree with Hunter that deflecting attention from the system is the best way to go, just be as "normal" as possible on the surface of things and work hard at home. But then, we homeschool, so I have no frame of reference for how hard it would be to after school a tired child after putting in my own work day.

 

Just thinking out loud here... I wonder if it would work to put your son to bed EARLY, and then get up EARLY, so he could do his homework then? It might take some adjustment, especially to allay his fears of not having it done at night, but over time, this might be the better way to go. You could have a relaxed hour or so at home in the mornings to get the work done.

 

At home, I would absolutely help him with writing, typing, understanding assignments, and so on. What a ridiculous approach on the part of the school, to expect a six year old to "own" his learning. I call it BS, 'cause that's what that is.

 

But, again, don't think "all or nothing." You can homeschool him the rest of this year, let his math accelerate, work on those writing and typing skills, give him time to grow and mature, and then see what you think might work for next year. Who knows what might change or open up by then?

[....]

I'm not an expert here...  But, my oldest went to public school briefly and tested in the gifted percentile (I think she was 99th percentile).  We didn't grade skip, because I pulled her out to homeschool after that.  I knew the school would not be able to meet her needs, her brother was having issues, too and she just needed a ton of free time (it's hard to explain, but she was having sensory overload problems).  The gifted specialist told me there are different "categories" of giftedness - like one kid might be gifted in math, but neurotypical in language abilities.  So, if you grade-skipped that kid...they might be able to hold their own in math, but not in other subjects.  

 

Have you seen the Hoagies Gifted website?    http://www.hoagiesgifted.org   I learned a bunch just from reading their articles.  Maybe something from there would be helpful.

 

Good luck with your decision! 

[Hunter]

Oh my goodness Hunter........your note struck a chord with me. This is absolutely what I feel we have done. Put a target on his back. That expresses it so accurately. :(

 

I do feel he is being asked to do things that are not developmentally appropriate. We also thought we could advocate for him and it feels like we made things much worse. I'm worried about what we are affecting in the long term. While homeschooling is not ideal for us financially, it may be something that we have to strongly consider now. I am tired of having this awful feeling in my stomach.

If you can, I would yank him for the rest of the year. Starting him in 2nd grade is much less obvious that putting him back in first grade.

 

I would just say homeschool, and as very little as possible. Less is more for the reasons you are yanking. Every word said could be a later closed door.

 

If you do put him back next year, say nothing about accelerated work at home. If interrogated, yes, he "played" with some above grade level material. Giggle.

 

"We had a lot of fun, but are ready to hand things back over to the experts. He learned a lot and had fun, but we don't feel confident that he covered all of second grade. Especially for social reasons we are requesting that he be placed with his age peers."

 

There are school that seek out and accommodate gifted children. They are rare. It doesn't sound like your school is one of them.

 

My kid spent maybe a day or two in school once we decided to yank him. The laws said I needed to ask and wait for permission, but things were just too hot to do that. Really, what can they do if you yank without "permission"? Not much. They just processed my paperwork faster since he was "truant".

[Hunter]

I yanked right before Christmas. I remember we had that nice new shiny math book for January. He was SO happy about his math book! It cracked when we opened it and it had that new book smell.

 

Before that I had scrambled to piece stuff together with yard sale and library books and handwritten problems I made up.

Edited December 16, 2015 by Hunter

[Hunter]

If you put him back next year, talk about how different 2nd grade is now from when you were in school. Instead of telling them they are nuts and developmentally inappropriate, praise them. Tell them how rich and comprehensive their curriculum is, and that you never could have covered that all at home.

Edited December 16, 2015 by Hunter

[Love2learn!]

We have decided to homeschool our son. To say I am nervous is an understatement. We are tired of him not getting what he needs. Our "plan" is to try and get in to a school that has a better suited model model for him and has no issues providing subject acceleration. It would not be until next school year.

 

Here are some questions I have...what should I use for reading/phonics/writing/spelling....essentially language arts. He is reading well and getting better...He can read MTH books (the early ones) in one sitting and others like that. He also reads Beast Academy for fun. He is not super advanced but doing very well. His school pushes phonics a lot and I don't see them having fun with actual reading. It seems that only the really advanced kids get to do Reader's Theater....he is stuck doing phonics drills. I want to give him a strong foundation in writing. He really enjoys spelling and is good at it. Given that he may be going back to school next year....what do I use. It should be easy to implement since I'm new to all of this. Thanks so much!!

[SarahW]

We have decided to homeschool our son. To say I am nervous is an understatement. We are tired of him not getting what he needs. Our "plan" is to try and get in to a school that has a better suited model model for him and has no issues providing subject acceleration. It would not be until next school year.

 

Here are some questions I have...what should I use for reading/phonics/writing/spelling....essentially language arts. He is reading well and getting better...He can read MTH books (the early ones) in one sitting and others like that. He also reads Beast Academy for fun. He is not super advanced but doing very well. His school pushes phonics a lot and I don't see them having fun with actual reading. It seems that only the really advanced kids get to do Reader's Theater....he is stuck doing phonics drills. I want to give him a strong foundation in writing. He really enjoys spelling and is good at it. Given that he may be going back to school next year....what do I use. It should be easy to implement since I'm new to all of this. Thanks so much!!

 

 

Perhaps look at English Lessons Through Literature? It'll get him away from drills and typing, and into reading and copying literature. 

 

With where he's at right now, I think ELTL and some math, and then interest-led whatever for the rest of the day, would be good.

[OneStepAtATime]

We have decided to homeschool our son. To say I am nervous is an understatement. We are tired of him not getting what he needs. Our "plan" is to try and get in to a school that has a better suited model model for him and has no issues providing subject acceleration. It would not be until next school year.

 

Here are some questions I have...what should I use for reading/phonics/writing/spelling....essentially language arts. He is reading well and getting better...He can read MTH books (the early ones) in one sitting and others like that. He also reads Beast Academy for fun. He is not super advanced but doing very well. His school pushes phonics a lot and I don't see them having fun with actual reading. It seems that only the really advanced kids get to do Reader's Theater....he is stuck doing phonics drills. I want to give him a strong foundation in writing. He really enjoys spelling and is good at it. Given that he may be going back to school next year....what do I use. It should be easy to implement since I'm new to all of this. Thanks so much!!

:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug: 

 

I did not join in earlier but I wanted to send you hugs.  I think you have made a good decision for your child's immediate needs. I did not take this route until my son was 8 and he suffered tremendous psychological damage.  He is now in 6th and still won't even let me drive on the road his school is located at.  Sometimes he still has nightmares.

 

As for what to use for language arts, I don't have a fun suggestion but I am sure others will.  You might want to start a new thread (but link this one in your first post so people can get back story without you having to retype the essentials).  You will probably get more helpful responses if the title reflects your new questions.

 

I also encourage you to contact your local homeschooling community and see if they are offering any fun field trips or fun spring classes or park days, etc.  He may feel very isolated and alone if he is pulled from school and has no community to be part of.  Plus, the local homeschool community may be able to actually show you some great materials to use with your child that you could actually SEE before trying, KWIM?

 

I wish you and your family all the best.  Hugs to you all.  

[snowbeltmom]

I also wanted to chime in with (hugs). Many of us have been in your situation. It is very difficult to watch your child suffer.

 

I just want to offer a word of warning about your local homeschooling groups based on my personal experience, which may not be relevant at all, obviously. Homeschooling is rare in my neck of the woods, and the families that I have met who homeschool, are not homeschooling for academic reasons. My local homeschooling community would not have been a good fit socially for my kids (signing a statement of faith was required, etc). I made sure when we started homeschooling that they had a lot of social outlets, but none of them was through our local homeschooling groups

 

Good luck with your homeschooling journey. You are giving your son a wonderful gift.

[TCB]

Just wanted to add a suggestion for writing. We have had good success with Writing With Ease and now Writing With Skill. Both my dds score in the gifted zone. I would recommend looking at WWE - it teaches summarizing very well, but gently also.

[Targhee]

If you are planning to have attend public school again next year I think he would be well served to follow what they do in public school for language arts, especially if he is working close to grade level (of his accelerated grade) . I would look at the Common Core standards for his current (accelerated) and his next grade to use as benchmarks, but really focus on his pace.

 

As far as curricula go that match the CC/public school approach I'm not terribly versed in them. But check big publishers like HM and Pearson.

[Love2learn!]

Thanks so much Targhee....that's good advice. I've checked the curriculum list for the potential new school and have the standards already. What makes it tacky is that their LA approach is different as it is integrated into other subjects vs. how the district ps do it. So I'm shooting for getting the standards covered even though through different programs. I am nervous!