Normal or abnormal 2 yr old behavior?

[lovinglife]

Hello! Just wanted some outside perspectives on if I am just being hypervigilant or if it could be a legitimate concern. Background - I have six children and my oldest is right on the edge of having an ASD diagnosis. He deals with trouble in anxiety, flexibility, organization and some other things but isn't quite on the spectrum. His youngest sibling has exhibited some behaviors similar to his brother for some time now that have worried his father and I. However, we have brushed them off as being overly worried parents. Last night he did something I find very unusual- enough to warrant concern but wonder if I am overreacting.

I washed his sheets, no big deal but the dryer was taking an exceptionally long time and when bedtime came around his sheet was still wet. I put a different sheet on his bed and when I went to put him to bed he had a complete meltdown! He screamed, said something along the lines of I don't like this and started pulling it off the bed. He refused to get in bed and sat and screamed until his normal sheet was mercifully done. I know kids can be attached to things, but is this over the top? We also have other things flagged- speech delay, temper control, and rigidity/flexibility issues but when you're dealing with a two year old many of these things are just part if development? What does the hive say?

[momto10blessings]

It could be normal. I could see my 2 year old doing the same thing.

[Pawz4me]

A tired 2 yo at bed time?  I wouldn't assume that behavior was abnormal.  Of course, that doesn't mean you can't or shouldn't file the incident away in your mind, just in case you eventually decide it's part and parcel of an ongoing pattern.

[Joanne]

 I know kids can be attached to things, but is this over the top? We also have other things flagged- speech delay, temper control, and rigidity/flexibility issues but when you're dealing with a two year old many of these things are just part if development? What does the hive say?

 

In context of family history AND the co-occurring issues, I'd be concerned and have an evaluation done by a qualified professional.

[SKL]

I would keep it in the back of my mind because of the other things you mentioned.

 

However, a tired 2yo can flip his lid over anything or nothing.  So that by itself would not scare me.

[Ausmumof3]

My 2 yo would do this when tired.

[catz]

It wouldn't alarm me as an isolated event, especially in a tired child this age.  I would just take note.  Has he been assessed for speech delay?  That would be a bigger alarm to me possibly and something I'd be following up on as a first step.  Kids can often start speech before age 2 or 3 and see where that road takes you.

[lovinmyboys]

That particular incident wouldn't concern me. My current 2yr old is by far the most laid back of my 4 children and I could see him doing that. He has only thrown like 2 fits in his life, but they were both over basically nothing. Once he got the whatever thing he wanted he was fine, but nothing else made him happy.

 

However, if it is something you are concerned about, I would have him evaluated.

[Reefgazer]

DS did something similar when he didn't like the patterned crib sheet I put on his bed at oh, about 10-12 months old.  He was a very late talker and he indicated his displeasure by pointing and grunting at the pattern.  When I told him it was Peter Rabbit and was staying there, he bent down while holding onto the edge of his crib to try and rub the pattern off with his finger.  I laughed so hard; it was cute!  Anyway, the Peter Rabbit stayed (I was too busy to futz around with sheet preferences), kid talked later than normal (for which we got him speech therapy for about 1 1/2 years starting at age 3), and he's a normal kid now.  Quite a bit more uptight than DD and I, but more like DH in his persnicketyness.  Eh, I'd say that fussiness is within the realm of normal, and honestly, I wouldn't like wet sheets, either.

Hello! Just wanted some outside perspectives on if I am just being hypervigilant or if it could be a legitimate concern. Background - I have six children and my oldest is right on the edge of having an ASD diagnosis. He deals with trouble in anxiety, flexibility, organization and some other things but isn't quite on the spectrum. His youngest sibling has exhibited some behaviors similar to his brother for some time now that have worried his father and I. However, we have brushed them off as being overly worried parents. Last night he did something I find very unusual- enough to warrant concern but wonder if I am overreacting.
I washed his sheets, no big deal but the dryer was taking an exceptionally long time and when bedtime came around his sheet was still wet. I put a different sheet on his bed and when I went to put him to bed he had a complete meltdown! He screamed, said something along the lines of I don't like this and started pulling it off the bed. He refused to get in bed and sat and screamed until his normal sheet was mercifully done. I know kids can be attached to things, but is this over the top? We also have other things flagged- speech delay, temper control, and rigidity/flexibility issues but when you're dealing with a two year old many of these things are just part if development? What does the hive say?

 

[maize]

At bed time I would see that as pretty normal. If such things happen frequently when he is well-rested, fed, not over stimulated I would be more concerned.

[lovinglife]

Just an update: he is receiving speech services and has made a lot of progress there, but still has trouble. The sheet I put on was a dry cotton blue one and his red jersey one was still in the wash. Good to know I may be overreacting, but I may also bring up the patterns of behavior at his well child visit.

[Farrar]

As an isolated incident, I would say normal. I mean, the thread title made me chuckle because I was like, 2 yos don't have normal behavior. They're all such unpredictable messes!

 

But since your gut is telling you it's maybe part of a pattern of issues and your older ds is about the receive an ASD diagnosis, I say listen to your gut and maybe look into an eval.

[Rachel]

That definitely sounds like normal 2 year old behavior to me, but because you have other concerns I would mention it at his next check up.

[Catwoman]

Sounds perfectly normal to me!

 

Unless you are seeing lots of other red flags, I wouldn't start analyzing everything a 2yo does to see if it qualifies as "normal."

 

I understand your concern because of his brother's issues, but I also know how easy it is to start seeing things that aren't there when we're worried. If I were you, I would treat him normally and try not to compare him with his brother unless you start to see a real pattern of behavior issues.

[katilac]

It wouldn't even blip on my radar for a 2-yr-old. My youngest went through a stage of having to have her blanket and sheets perfectly smooth, even while she was sleeping. So, if she happened to wake up in the night, she actually hopped out of bed to 'fix' it.  

 

We joke that our entire family has recreational OCD, so we all do some weird things, but thankfully she grew out of that one. Many kids, and people in general, really, like to have a very set routine for bedtime. Wanting your own sheets on your own bed falls in the typical range for a toddler, imo.

 

I'd keep an eye out for rigid behaviors in general, but this one in particular would not bother me.  

 

 

 

[Elisabet1]

Do the sheets feel different or anything?

 

Do they look different..like one has trains and the other is plain?

[Pronghorn]

Could be sensory issues too.

[lovinglife]

Yes - one red one blue and one was jersey while the other was cotton

[Elisabet1]

Yes - one red one blue and one was jersey while the other was cotton

He probably does not like the change in fabric.

 

Here is the thing...HALF my children have ASD. But anyone of them could have gotten upset over the change. One time, one did not want to sleep in his room. So I took him to the store to pick out his own bedding. He picked monkey bedding that was on clearance. I drove all over the place, as in for hours, to collect all the pieces he needed as it was clearancing out. I came home and washed and put on his bed. Seemed fine. But, he still refused to sleep on it. Then the little stinker went and told his dad he was scared of monkeys!!!! Not kidding! His dad went out and picked out plain colored, but very high thread count expensive sheets that said child swore he could sleep on. Nope..some child took a scissors to those sheets (the notmemonster). Original child went back to sleeping in our room. 

 

The child who claimed to be scared of monkeys does not have ASD. He also did not know how to use scissors..I think. I am not sure. Anyway, point is, anything can set a child off. I have to have my sheets the same feel.

[foxbridgeacademy]

Even my low key (now 13 y.o!) would occasionally throw a fit like that at bedtime.  He still is at his worst when tired or hungry.  Even so, you have a family history of borderline ASD and early treatment is key to progress in the long term.  So unless it would cause undue hardship, I'd get him tested.  Another thing to think about is that the stress of not knowing and the hyper-vigilance ('cause you know you will watch him looking for signs) will stress him out and cause even more outbursts.  

 

ETA: IME sensory issues can become huge problems throughout life.  I had a problem with socks as a child.  I couldn't handle the feel of the sewn bit at the toe actually touching my toes.  You wouldn't believe how many times a day I would take off my shoes to "fix" it.  Around my early 20's I stopped having a problem with it.  I also hate super soft/fuzzy things to the point that if they touch my skin I feel physically ill (I'm so easy to torture).