How would you handle this scenario?

[QuirkyKapers]

There is going to be an event planning meeting. You have been to only one of these events in the past. However, you aren't given any details about what all is involved in planning/help needed for the event. If you come to the planning meeting, the leaders are expecting that you are willing to help. In fact, it was stated that no one who comes says no to helping. Everyone attending will share about themselves, it will then be decided where people will help with the event.

 

Just curious about what people would do :)

 

 

 

[Garga]

What? What is the context? I don't know for sure what a planning event even is. Is this planning for a church's valentines day dinner? A PTA planning meeting? Marketing at a business? What does it mean that people are sharing info? Is this an AA planning meeting?

 

Give us some context so we can answer.

[Forget-Me-Not]

Nope, I wouldn't go if it meant I was obligated to commit.

[Farrar]

I don't know how to answer either... If I was going to a planning meeting, presumably it would be something I had a stake in and wanted to plan and pitch in. But showing up shouldn't mean I have to do whatever the other people tell me. And I wouldn't want to help with something completely dictatorial like that...

[happi duck]

The expectation of committing sight unseen is so weird to me.

 

The idea of sharing about myself and then being given an assignment...no way!

 

I wouldn't have the patience to consider something like that.

[Word Nerd]

Too vague to answer. If it were something for our county 4-H and was connected to my role as a community leader, then I'd consider going depending on what the event was. For some random thing in the community that I'm not already connected with or interested in? Nope.

[Ripley]

I'd just go and take whatever job they put me in. I spent years heading volunteer efforts, so I aim to be a "model volunteer" by showing up and going where directed. LOL It doesn't matter if it's church, scouts, sports, or community. The one caveat would be moral and ethical issues, and I'd have no issues asking for re-assignment in those cases.

 

I usually end up in the crap jobs, but someone has to take them! ;) And I'd rather take the crap job alone, than get stuck with the crap job because I'm the volunteer coordinator and nobody else has stepped up to. Double-whammy. :D

[QuirkyKapers]

It's a church event for women.  People are sharing their testimony.

[MFG]

It's a church event for women. People are sharing their testimony.

So not what I would want to do.

[Ellie]

Yup, I'd go. I love event planning. And having been on the leader end of some event planning, I can appreciate the fact that the announcement was made the way it was: People who show up are expected to volunteer in some capacity. I hate it when a boatload of people come to the planning meeting and then decide they don't want to help, or they only want to do *this* thing when what we really need is *that* thing, and so, not getting their way, they leave.

 

No one is being guilted into anything. All the people who go know up-front what event the planning is for and by virtue of their being there are assumed to be willing to help. People who don't want to help don't go.

[bolt.]

I'm always hesitant about this sort of thing.

 

If I had the time (both to meet and to contribute to the event) -- and if I 'believed in' the event, or the people... I might go.

 

If I went, I'd expect a job that went along with my sense of how I could best contribute. If I felt my time/willingness (or my vulnerability) was being manhandled unjustly, or if I no longer 'believed in' the event or the people, I'd back out without feeling badly about breaking the assumption of my participation.

 

If I chose to back out, I'd do if diplomatically at the time, but I'd probably follow up later (after the event) with some feedback on how/why the process made me uncomfortable.

[ChristusG]

They are commanding that if you attend the planning meeting then you must help. By what force??

 

I don't like volunteering for things that I know nothing about.

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

Well, the statement that "no one who comes says no to helping" doesn't sound like you're committed if you show up. To me, it sounds like a rah-rah thing--like, "Oh, it's such a great event, everyone who comes to find out more is eager to participate." (It also sounds like hooey to me. I can't imagine that not one single person EVER has decided that they couldn't fit this magical event into their schedule after all.) I wouldn't let that scare me off of going if it was an event I might want to be part of. But then again, I wouldn't let "If you come to the planning meeting, the leaders are expecting that you are willing to help" corner me into committing if it turned out I was the one single person who decided it wasn't for me. 

 

So I voted that I'd go but not feel obligated to help if none of the jobs were something I'd like or feel comfortable with. If I declined and was feeling pressured, I'd be truthful and say that if there wasn't this air of secrecy around the event, I'd have known better in advance whether it was the right fit for me. 

[carriede]

So, is the leader of the event saying that all volunteers must also present their testimony? And you are uncomfortable with giving one?

 

I might tell the coordinator, "I don't feel comfortable giving a testimony, but I'd love to help plan the event. May I still come to the meeting? I'd really like to help with the ____!" And then let the coordinator decide if you're welcome or not.

 

If you don't feel comfortable telling the coordinator that you don't want to give a testimony, I'd say there's something wrong with the leadership...

[marbel]

It seems like an odd way to hold a planning meeting for a church event. I'm confused by the testimony thing.  Do you mean that at the planning meeting all the women have to share their testimonies to determine how they can best help?  So the people with boring testimonies end up on the cleanup crew? 

 

I do a lot of planning for church women's events.  No one is ever required to help but it sure would be nice if more did.  If people show up at a planning meeting, some leave without offering to help.  Sometimes some need to think about it or check their calendars.   Some find there's nothing to do that they want to do or feel capable of doing.  

[Cinder]

I don't think I'd go. Am I understanding this correctly--that you'll be assigned a job after everyone has had a chance to share their testimony? How is their testimony related to their spiritual gifts, to how they can best serve? I wouldn't appreciate someone telling me that I should be in charge of the meal planning crew or childcare when I'm much better at post-event cleanup.

[QuirkyKapers]

Thanks for all the replies.  I found out that it is indeed true that when you go to the meeting, than it is assumed you are willing to pitch in and help.  Prior to the meeting, it is suggested that you pray about if God wants you to help or not.  It is made clear you should only come if you really think God wants you to help not because everyone else is doing it or out of obligation or guilt.  I did ask for what the different parts were that people could help with but never recieved the information.  I also found out more about the process that takes place at the meeting.  The jobs and their descriptions are given out there, which explains why I didn't get information prior.  Everyone  does give their testimony.  After all testimonies are given, there is a time of prayer if you think they would be good doing a position, something sticks out for them, you write that down.  After prayer, you gather again and discuss the jobs.  If it comes up that a person is overwhelming chosen to do something, they are asked.  If they are declined than they will be given something else to do. 

 

This process is very different than what I have been accustomed too.  Generally, a list of jobs would be given and you would pray over where you felt God was leading you.  I can see how some people don't have a problem just being open to doing whatever.  I think because of my personality type and past experiences where I have been told God laid it on my heart....or it seems God is calling you to....has never gone well.  I have plugged in, even when feeling very uncomfortable, and it has been a disaster in group situations.  I am sure that having the background I do, just going with the flow is extremely difficult since I am used to being on guard for being taken advantage off because of past manipulation and abuse in my life.   I know I am really skeptical of we all prayed and it seems God is calling you to x,y,z especially if I haven't felt a call myself. Also, if I decline than what happens when I get put in something else that is uncomfortable.  I also get that there are jobs that don't really matter in terms of is God calling you or not, like getting the plates and silverware together etc.  I was glad that someone explained the process to me.  I don't think it is unreasonable, but I just wonder how many people really are comfortable with this type of situation.   I know I have a really difficult time making a committment to something when put on the spot and not having time to process things.  Of course, sometimes I can just process myself right out of doing something.  :)

 

 

[Catwoman]

Thanks for all the replies. I found out that it is indeed true that when you go to the meeting, than it is assumed you are willing to pitch in and help. Prior to the meeting, it is suggested that you pray about if God wants you to help or not. It is made clear you should only come if you really think God wants you to help not because everyone else is doing it or out of obligation or guilt. I did ask for what the different parts were that people could help with but never recieved the information. I also found out more about the process that takes place at the meeting. The jobs and their descriptions are given out there, which explains why I didn't get information prior. Everyone does give their testimony. After all testimonies are given, there is a time of prayer if you think they would be good doing a position, something sticks out for them, you write that down. After prayer, you gather again and discuss the jobs. If it comes up that a person is overwhelming chosen to do something, they are asked. If they are declined than they will be given something else to do.

 

This process is very different than what I have been accustomed too. Generally, a list of jobs would be given and you would pray over where you felt God was leading you. I can see how some people don't have a problem just being open to doing whatever. I think because of my personality type and past experiences where I have been told God laid it on my heart....or it seems God is calling you to....has never gone well. I have plugged in, even when feeling very uncomfortable, and it has been a disaster in group situations. I am sure that having the background I do, just going with the flow is extremely difficult since I am used to being on guard for being taken advantage off because of past manipulation and abuse in my life. I know I am really skeptical of we all prayed and it seems God is calling you to x,y,z especially if I haven't felt a call myself. Also, if I decline than what happens when I get put in something else that is uncomfortable. I also get that there are jobs that don't really matter in terms of is God calling you or not, like getting the plates and silverware together etc. I was glad that someone explained the process to me. I don't think it is unreasonable, but I just wonder how many people really are comfortable with this type of situation. I know I have a really difficult time making a committment to something when put on the spot and not having time to process things. Of course, sometimes I can just process myself right out of doing something. :)

Seriously? You're supposed to pray so God can lead you to which volunteer job you should do for a project? :rolleyes:

 

Doesn't God have better things to do than tell people whether they should sit at a registration table or set up the tables and chairs? :D

 

Seriously, this sounds manipulative and ridiculous. I wouldn't go.

 

But maybe it's because I'm not used to churches like that, so I may not be the best person to answer this question.

[QuirkyKapers]

Seriously? You're supposed to pray so God can lead you to which volunteer job you should do for a project? :rolleyes:

 

Doesn't God have better things to do than tell people whether they should sit at a registration table or set up the tables and chairs? :D

 

Seriously, this sounds manipulative and ridiculous. I wouldn't go.

 

But maybe it's because I'm not used to churches like that, so I may not be the best person to answer this question.

 

 

It's acutally a conference if that makes a difference :)

[SeaConquest]

The whole thing sounds bizarre.

[Catwoman]

It's acutally a conference if that makes a difference :)

:D :D :D

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

Thanks for all the replies.  I found out that it is indeed true that when you go to the meeting, than it is assumed you are willing to pitch in and help.  Prior to the meeting, it is suggested that you pray about if God wants you to help or not.  It is made clear you should only come if you really think God wants you to help not because everyone else is doing it or out of obligation or guilt.  I did ask for what the different parts were that people could help with but never recieved the information.  I also found out more about the process that takes place at the meeting.  The jobs and their descriptions are given out there, which explains why I didn't get information prior.  Everyone  does give their testimony.  After all testimonies are given, there is a time of prayer if you think they would be good doing a position, something sticks out for them, you write that down.  After prayer, you gather again and discuss the jobs.  If it comes up that a person is overwhelming chosen to do something, they are asked.  If they are declined than they will be given something else to do. 

 

This process is very different than what I have been accustomed too.  Generally, a list of jobs would be given and you would pray over where you felt God was leading you.  I can see how some people don't have a problem just being open to doing whatever.  I think because of my personality type and past experiences where I have been told God laid it on my heart....or it seems God is calling you to....has never gone well.  I have plugged in, even when feeling very uncomfortable, and it has been a disaster in group situations.  I am sure that having the background I do, just going with the flow is extremely difficult since I am used to being on guard for being taken advantage off because of past manipulation and abuse in my life.   I know I am really skeptical of we all prayed and it seems God is calling you to x,y,z especially if I haven't felt a call myself. Also, if I decline than what happens when I get put in something else that is uncomfortable.  I also get that there are jobs that don't really matter in terms of is God calling you or not, like getting the plates and silverware together etc.  I was glad that someone explained the process to me.  I don't think it is unreasonable, but I just wonder how many people really are comfortable with this type of situation.   I know I have a really difficult time making a committment to something when put on the spot and not having time to process things.  Of course, sometimes I can just process myself right out of doing something.  :)

 

OK, given the extra info, I'm going to go with, "No thank you." God may be calling them to run the process that way, but if he's not calling you to feel like you need to participate in that process, then I'd honor THAT. I'm certain there will be other ways you can contribute to other, equally important projects.

 

Of course, if you DO feel strongly like you're being called in spite of your discomfort, then that's something you have to work out between you and God. I'm glad you got the extra information, though, so you could make an informed choice. Nothing like being blindsided by guilt and manipulation and someone else's version of what God wants you to do.

 

Blech. That all just seems so much more complicated than it needs to be, but if it works for them, I guess they shouldn't change it!

[MFG]

Seriously? You're supposed to pray so God can lead you to which volunteer job you should do for a project? :rolleyes:

 

Doesn't God have better things to do than tell people whether they should sit at a registration table or set up the tables and chairs? :D

 

Seriously, this sounds manipulative and ridiculous. I wouldn't go.

 

But maybe it's because I'm not used to churches like that, so I may not be the best person to answer this question.

This. I would find it annoying if a church group tried to spiritualize essentially mundane tasks. I don't need a special calling to do registration or set up or whatever, the fact that a task fits my talents, interests, or availability is enough. Add the potential of guilt manipulation where others are going to decide my gifting and I'm outta there.

[MomatHWTK]

I think I have been to a conference similar to this, and the participants would not necessarily consider any task mundane. I am making assumptions but this type of conference is supposed to be a prayer-washed event where everyone who works to make it happen is strongly called to do so.  If you are there, it is supposed to be because of the Holly Spirit's calling for you to be there in that role.  I don't see anything manipulative about the process.  From the moment guests arrive they should feel the power of that faith. No one is being told they have to volunteer, they are being told that they shouldn't volunteer unless they feel a powerful calling.   

 

I probably wouldn't feel comfortable just being asked out of the blue to participate in such an event.  But, if I felt a calling would answer.  KWIM?  And that is the whole point, if you aren't feeling a strong tugging to go and be able to give 100% spirit-filled service at this particular event then it isn't the event you are made to serve.  I was not a member of the denomination that did the event I attended and found some of it very inspiring, some of it a little overwhelming.  I'm one of those old school believers who sits quietly and prays. This was an aisle call, laying of hands and giving of testimony type event.  Not bad, just different for this introvert.  ;)

[katilac]

 

 

Doesn't God have better things to do than tell people whether they should sit at a registration table or set up the tables and chairs? :D

 

Now all I can think of is the SNL Pious Housewife sketch, when Jesus says: I was wondering.. if you would try.. to not pray so much? 

[Catwoman]

Now all I can think of is the SNL Pious Housewife sketch, when Jesus says: I was wondering.. if you would try.. to not pray so much?

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: