Do you sit down with your 4th grader or do they work independently?

[ChristusG]

This year I've been having my 4th grade DD do her "independent work" by herself, in her bedroom. I do this while I'm working with my 1st grader, who obviously cannot work alone at this point. I write out her assignments in her planner, get her books together, and send her off with the things that she needs. Independently, I have her doing math, spelling, grammar,  thinking skills, writing, cursive practice, and her devotion. Afterwards, I check her work while she has free time, and then call her back to me and we go over anything that is wrong or that she may need help with. Well, the things that she gets wrong is growing and we end up sitting there together a LONG time....and she gets frustrated because it is going over things she already did and she got wrong (mainly math.....she gets them right when we sit down and do them together, but wrong when she does them alone. I don't get it). She'll skip portions of an assignment or forget to read the directions. If I say to write a paragraph, she'll write one run-on sentence. I'm thinking that since we sit there for so long anyways, maybe I should just be working with her one on one instead of sending her off independently. Although, I'm not sure what I'll be doing with my 2 year old while I work independently with my 4th grader, then my 1st grader. They can each help entertain her while I help the other, but a lot of times my 2 year old just wants mommy.

 

When do your kids start working more independently? I guess I just thought I could do less hand holding with school work by the fourth grade. All other subjects we do together.

 

 

[Starr]

Neither of mine could have done that at in 4th grade. We were rather on top of each other for many more years. You might try having her do one assignment and then come back to you with it. And it sounds like you'll need to be there during math. I would have both of them at the table doing math and help which ever one needs it.  :grouphug: I found home teaching to be more difficult as they got older. She's doing fine, she's just not cooked yet. That's why she's still at home. Hang in there mom!

[deerforest]

I have a 4th grader, and she does some things independently but it's after we spend several hours together. I have very teacher-intensive curricula by choice. But, my DD would not be successful with the situation you described.

[Chelli]

Once mine can read I start giving them independent work to do, usually a geography worksheet, handwriting practice, logic problem, and their math worksheet. They only do their math worksheet after we've done the main lesson together. My dd10 who is in fourth could do what you asked your daughter to do, but she's been doing something similar since she was in late first/early second grade. That doesn't mean she'd get all of her math right, but she would get pretty close and we'd go over the ones she missed later.

[Farrar]

I mostly sit with them.  I send them off to work on their own occasionally.  They manage certain things - piano practice, some map stuff on the computer, school reading, etc. by themselves.  And they actually prefer to write with me not right there - I think it makes them self-conscious.  I can't imagine giving them a list and expecting them to come back two hours later with it all done though.  Come, get one assignment, come back, get another.  But math, spelling, projects, history, etc. etc. all need me right there.  On the one hand, I feel your frustration.  I also have had to adjust my expectation about what level of work my kids would be doing "independently" at this age.  I was saying recently to a newbie prospective homeschool mom of littles that I spend a lot more time teaching one on one with my kids now than I did when they were younger, which really subverted her expectation that by this age it would all be a breeze - just put the assignments up on the board kind of thing.  When they were little, yes, everything took my attention and now some things can be independent, but there's a lot more volume of work and much of it still requires that I keep on top of them, answering their questions and helping them negotiate how to get the work done.

 

And keep in mind that kids in school aren't doing that much more independently at this age - there's a huge amount of peer pressure sitting there in the room with a couple dozen other students to be "on track" and teachers are constantly doing little things to keep checking in with kids and to keep them on task.  So the "independence" level is sort of an illusion.  Plus, they often, in a classroom, often learn the strategy of skipping stuff they don't understand and then having to go back.  A necessary coping skill maybe, but not the best thing ever.

[g7s22]

I usually go over the lesson/assignment first, covering any new material and making sure she understands what is expected.  Then she goes and does it, but my DD9 is very independent regarding schoolwork.  We do some subjects together such as history and science. 

[ChristusG]

Thank you for the perspective! She does good with actually getting it all done....it's just that she doesn't always do it right lol. Looks like we'll try to reconfigure our schedule beginning on Monday and I'll work more one on one with her. I'd love to have both kids sit together and help whomever needs help, but DD9 is very quirky with OCD tendencies and I don't think that would work for her. If I talked to DD6, then DD9 would say she couldn't think due to the talking.

[NASDAQ]

My second grader does some things independently -- I give her X, she does it, I check on her -- but it's short segments. Never more than thirty minutes alone, usually more like twenty. Then I do something with her. Check, check, check. Even if you're just peaking over her shoulder, you can verify that she's on the right track and not going off on some rabbit trail that she'll have to redo.

 

 

At least keep her in your presence while she works. If she's fussy about the noise, try noise-blocking headphones. Construction headphones work for this. You could also use a fan or music to distract her from the sound of first grader.

 

 

[Thia7278]

The kids have stuff they can do independent of me (writing, health, +).  They start this in the morning while I meet one on one with each child.  I teach them new concepts, review a few older things.  Then I quickly show them what they need to do.  All their books/notebooks go in one box.  As they finish stuff, it goes in the back of their box for me to check later.  Once we've reviewed their work, they take their box to their spot at the table and get to work.  No one goes off in another room to work (maybe high school level I'll let them?).  If they get stuck while they're working, they let me know and I will circle back to them to either answer their question or ask them to skip it for now.  I find they have few questions because of our earlier meeting.  I check their work all at once then we have correction time later.

[Soror]

Ds would be either 3rd or 4th depending on cut-offs. He wouldn't be able to do what you had at all. He can *sometimes* do a few short simple things on his own but the quality of his work improves drastically in my presence. 

[Heidi]

My dd9 does most of her work independently. I do spend some time with her going over things she gets wrong. She rushes through her work so she can go play so she makes a lot of mistakes. I'm hoping one of these days she will figure out that if she does it right the first time it will actually save her more time. She is pretty good at reading the directions and understanding what to do.

Now my dd8 is slow as molasses, and unless I'm sitting right there with her she will daydream until bedtime and not do anything. However, she is also careful and neat in her work and usually gets most things right the first time.

Dd8 is learning how to be more independent. R&S English and MM are both good for this since the instruction is right in the manual. Right now I read it with her and make sure she understands what to do, but she will eventually figure out how to read the examples and follow the directions like her sister, I'm sure.

Of course both of them come to me if they don't understand and I will help them out.

Latin and writing are not independent, so that is where I put in my teaching hours right now.

[Laura Corin]

I sat at a large table between my children until they were well past that age.  At school, they are surrounded by other children doing the same thing - that keeps them going.  At home, most children will need a warm body nearby at that age to keep them on track.  By about age 13, Calvin was working in his room a bit.

 

L

[FO4UR]

My 10yo is not quite ready for that level of independence.  I sometimes let him take math to his room, and it always takes 3x as long to get it done and sometimes he'll d a whole section wrong b/c he didn't read.the.directions!  I'm requiring him to work in the same room with me now.  I don't usually need to help him much, but it helps a great deal if I can look over his shoulder as he goes.

 

 

I'd recommend having your 4th grader play with the little one while you work with the 1st grader.  Streamline the 1st grader's work!  (One hour, after breakfast.)

 

 

Give the 4th grader very few,  concrete assignments to do independently in the morning.  If there were fewer of these assignments, maybe the ones she did would be of better quality.  Then when the toddler goes down for nap, send the 1st grader to some quiet time, and sit down with the 4th grader.  I think a 4th grader needs about 2 hours of mommy-time, and 2 hours of mom-over-the shoulder time.  ymmv

[BatmansWife]

My 4th grader does a couple of things by herself...but for the most part we do everything together.  We are using TT for math and I watch the lecture with her....then she usually does the workbook page by herself, and then I join her again for putting the answers in the computer.  Most of our other stuff requires a lot of reading, so we do it together.  But, she's my youngest...and she wants me to be with her doing her school work (and frankly, I do too).  She reads really good, but I think if I sent her off to do her work by herself I don't know that she'd comprehend everything correctly and then would get a lot wrong. 

[MomintheMountains]

My fifth grader had been fairly independent since third grade when his reading took off. I go over his assignments with him and then he sits and does them independently. I am available for questions or to help him through a hard assignment (usually math). I have to sit with my current third grader for everything other than handwriting. I don't see that changing any time soon. My 1st grader, of course, needs me for all of his assignments, but I suspect that based on his personality, he will be independent once his reading skills are good.

[Embassy]

For me it depends on the kid.  One kid was much better doing work independently in 4th grade than the other.  Just gradually give the child more independent work as you feel she can handle it.

[kbutton]

It depends on the assignment, but my DS 9/4th grade would not be able to work as independently as what you describe. He can do some assignments that way, but not many. If her assignments don't have predictable directions (exercises that are the same from lesson to lesson), you really need to have her read the directions and explain them back to you before you set her loose. Maybe even work a couple of the items in each section together. My son used A Beka math in private school for K-2 (and I used it as an elementary student). Sometimes the directions are harder than the math or unrelated to the math in order to give the activities more variety. If she's messing up the directions but the math is fine, you might not worry about it a lot. Also, some kids make mistakes when they face a lot of repetition--you might consider having your daughter do just the hardest problems (or maybe half the problems) when she's gotten reasonably proficient. A Beka has a lot of repetition and review both as a strategy and as a way to keep a classroom of kids busy.

 

You might also scale back a bit on the independent work to one or two subjects until she is more thorough. You could also break her work up into more than one timeframe, have her check in more frequently, or restrict the independent work to specific subjects or review material. Every time I think we've gained a bit of independence, we need a new skill, lol! I also don't like a lot of repetitive work, so I kind of shoot myself in the foot in this regard by not giving my son more predictable material.

[Jess4879]

My 4th grader does some solo work, but a lot is after I teach the lesson.  So I will spend 15 mins or so teaching, per subject, and then she's got her assignment to do.  She wouldn't do well with self-teaching at this age.

[boscopup]

My 4th grader has a few things he does independently, but math and writing are done with me there, giving input. His independent work is spelling, history/literature, and Latin (though sometimes he needs me there too - lately he's been doing fine on his own). If math is somewhat of a review topic, he might do it all on his own, but otherwise I am present to bounce ideas off of. Math and writing both require a lot of discussion at this point.

 

Perhaps you could narrow down which subjects she's getting a lot of things wrong in, and do more one-on-one in those subjects only, but let the others stay independent if they're working for her.

[Juliegmom]

I usually go over the lesson/assignment first, covering any new material and making sure she understands what is expected. Then she goes and does it, but my DD9 is very independent regarding schoolwork. We do some subjects together such as history and science.

Same here. History and science are more hands on and we often have a read aloud so we always cover these subjects together. Sometimes dd will work on notebooking pages independently that tie into history or science.

[Mommy22alyns]

4th grade, I still sat with Rebecca completely.  Only this year has she started to do some things independently.

[Arcadia]

My 4th grader likes to be in charge from the get go. I didn't need to do anything for him to be independent. My 2nd grader can do independent work but need me to check on him to make sure he is not daydreaming or have fallen asleep.

[MinivanMom]

My 4th grader does a lot independently, but she never goes off to work alone. I'm always sitting on the opposite side of the table working with her younger siblings. I give her a checklist each week, but she doesn't just work through it independently. I start her off by going over her math lesson with her and then she does her math assignment on her own. I check her work (and she corrects any mistakes) before going onto grammar. It's like this as she works through her checklist. I'm always sitting right across the table if she has questions or problems, and I always check her work before she goes onto the next thing.

[Dmmetler]

My 4th grader can handle online stuff mostly independently. AOPS she needs me there to talk through the problems with, and I prefer to do history, MCT and literature with her so we can talk about it. She does her assignments for Athena's academy, Uzzingo, Mathletics/Spellodrome, the Cambridge Latin website, and Duolingo Spanish on her own, and is mostly independent with piano.