Laura Corin Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 'Hobbes' is away at scout camp this weekend, sharing a tent with three other boys. The morning after they set off by private bus, I suddenly realised that I had messed up the arrangements for collecting him on Monday: I was going to be an hour late due to work commitments. I know one of the other mothers slightly, so I called her (mid-morning) to ask if she could possibly pick up Hobbes and keep him for an hour until I was free He doesn't have a door key on him, otherwise I would have just asked her to drop him home. The two boys are about the same age; both have been away to camp before, but Hobbes more often than the other boy. The conversation went like this: Me: (light, friendly tone) Hello, this is Laura [Corin], [Hobbes'] mum. Her: (panic in voice) Has something happened? Me: No, no. Nothing like that. I'm sure they're fine. I haven't heard from them. I'm sorry I worried you. I was just calling to......... Anyway: I was wondering how common assuming the worst would be. Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebecca VA Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 The other mom might just have separation-anxiety issues you're not aware of. Or she might have been startled to hear from someone she hardly knows. Maybe she'll have calmed down by the time you see her and be able to laugh off her momentary panic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mumto2 Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 I might worry about what you were planning to ask me to do or participate in but not about my child being in any danger! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 I doubt I would think the worst on most days, but I know there have been periods of life when I probably would have. If I'm nervous about something it tends to rub off on other things I would usually be fine about. My mother, on the other hand, is much more on edge. If I call her during a time of day when I don't usually call, she *always* thinks something is wrong. You can literally hear the fear in her voice. Have you ever called her before? Was it on the early or the late side when you called? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WishboneDawn Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 Double post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WishboneDawn Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 I don't know if how I would react would be useful or meaningful. In a situation like that you never know what might have been going on on her end of the line. I don't see a point to the question I guess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 I have massive an anxiety when my kids are away. I try to hide it better than this woman did, but I am internally alarmed when my kids are away. Bus crashes, house fires, I have lots of worries. It's ridicous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
linders Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 Another parent calling? No worry. A scout leader calling? Instant panic. Which is why last night, when we decided to end our troop's campout a half-day early due to torrential rain and winds, my call to every parent started with a rapid-fire, "Hi-this-is-Linda J- from-scouts-and-your-son-is-doing-great..." Then went on the explain the weather and our early homecoming. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 I can imagine myself asking the same question in a similar situation. I don't think asking "has something happened," even in a "panicky" voice (subjective) means that one is assuming "the worst." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 I don't know if how I would react ould be useful or meaningful. In a situation like that you never know what might have been going on on her end of the line. I don't see a point to the question I guess. Yeah, sometimes I'd panic and sometimes I wouldn't. Sometimes I'd come across like, "Oh, %&*($, now what happened that I have to deal with, and why is this day spinning down the toilet." It just sort of depends on what else is happening in life at the moment. Also, if I know someone only slightly, I'd be proud of myself for remembering who you are enough TO panic. I recognize people by face, so when they call on the phone I'm likely to be clueless as to who they are for about half the conversation. I guess in that case I could be panicking because I thought you were someone else calling about something totally unrelated that is, indeed, panic-worthy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AimeeM Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 If you aren't someone that normally calls me, and our children had just left, yes I would probably assume the worst. I wouldn't panic, but I would immediately ask if everything is "okay". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 It wouldn't occur to me to panic. My first thought would be that you were after a favor. It isn't as if you were admin or a counselor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 Yes, if you aren't a regular caller, my immediate reaction would likely be worry. I don't think that counts as panic or "assuming the WORST", but I'd definitely wonder what went wrong. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 It wouldn't occur to me to panic. It wouldn't occur to me that another parent would be the official bearer of bad news anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elfgivas Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 i voted "other", because while it might occurr to me to worry, it isn't my first reaction to phone calls. but linda's strategy of starting the conversation with "your son is fine" sounds like a good approach.... although i'm gathering you aren't with them, so then its just a little sad that she'd be so worried. hope they've had a great time! ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 I don't know. People react to things differently and for different reasons, and you can't really know how you'd react in a similar situation. I got a call from my DD's principal once before, and my stomach lurched as soon as he identified himself. It took my pulse a bit to slow down even after he told me the reason for his call was to ask me to be on the site council. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loowit Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 If it were a scout leader, I would be a bit concerned, but wait to hear what they needed. Both of my boy, though, have special needs so that would likely be the first thing to pop into my head. I doubt it would if it were DD. If it were a parent, the only "panic" would be what they want me to do now. I am a scout leader, and I am asked to do a lot by the parents who aren't very involved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starwarsmomma Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 Brand new scout mom whose not used to sending kids off to campouts-- worried. experienced scout mom -- not worried. scout mom with kid that has health issues-- very worried. I'm all 3, depending on the kid. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nd293 Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 I do know that when dd's school has called me in the past, the first thing the administrator says is 'It's nothing serious' or 'There's no problem' and in the second before that I usually do prepare myself for a problem of some sort. I wouldn't expect the worst, exactly, nor panic, but I would anticipate a problem and begin to mentally gear up for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happymomofboys Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 If my kid was away and a parent of another child who was at the same place called and she wasn't someone I commonly speak to on the phone, I would immediately assume the worst and be happily relieved to find the call is nothing bad. Of course, I know that I'm not the norm. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Firefly Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 It wouldn't have occurred to me to worry. I'm a glass is half full kinda girl. ;-) Dh on the other hand- instant worry for sure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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