Would you call my kid a retard?

[ravinlunachick]

http://www.lovethatmax.com/

 

It's Spread the Word to End the Word Day. Please scroll down and watch the video. As the mom of a (different) Max with special needs, I thank you. :001_smile:

[TranquilMind]

http://www.lovethatmax.com/

 

It's Spread the Word to End the Word Day. Please scroll down and watch the video. As the mom of a (different) Max with special needs, I thank you. :001_smile:

That is a horrible word I have never permitted my children to use, ever.

 

My husband's sister has mental impairments from a birth accident which caused a lack of oxygen. She was treated terribly in school.

[Jennifer in MI]

I love this. My sister was born with fetal alcohol effect. Her IQ is very low. I absolutely HATE that word. HATE it.

 

(She was adopted. My mom wasn't the one who drank!)

[ravinlunachick]

I really do believe that most people who use it today really don't think that it is an insult to mentally disabled people. They just view it as slang, like referring to a boring tv show as "lame." I've had people try to argue that I'm insulting physically handicapped folks if I use it. They key difference, IMO, is that the word "retarded" is still used as a diagnosis. Lame is not.

 

Our local mall used to have a big public awareness sign that said, "That's so Gamer Guy who has more video games than friends!" Of course, that particular sign was about using the word "gay" as an insult, but the sentiment is the same. It's easy to see how it's offensive if you substitute something that describes someone you love.

 

 

Apologies for the zillion quotation marks in this post. ;)

[NotAVampireLvr]

there are very few things I will call people out on ... like almost nothing really. This however is one word I don't tolerate and I speak up EVERY time I hear it used improperly.

[LuvingLife]

I loathe the word and never ever use it!! I used to get into fights with kids because I would stick up for them, my sister has a slight learning disability and I fought for her as well. (Never physical, but verbal).

 

I just recently had to stop volunteering at a rehabilitation school for kids with learning disabilities, but I loved every minute of it. I will fight for those kids, this world has just let things whither away for far too long.

[JFSinIL]

I was appalled the other day when my youngest dd (15) used the word - I called her on it and she insisted it was just common slang and not derogatory. I reamed her up and down and in and out and don't think she will be using that word again soon ;) after all, her oldest sibling is SillyAutismMan.

[Xilka]

Deeply touched. The video made me cry. Beautifully done.

I'm sure it will make people think before they use the word.

And I admire you taking a stand to make a more aware, informed, inclusive, and respectful world.

[sassenach]

Thanks for posting this. I just put it up on my FB. I have a "Max," too.

[Remudamom]

I hate that word. Hate it.

[Heatherwith4]

I will not ever allow my kids to use that word.

[J-rap]

Thank you for posting this. I have a husband who is a "Max," now, since his stroke. To me, he is still my husband. I've also become very sensitive to people who use the word "brain damaged" carelessly. As in, "Do I look like I'm brain damaged or something!?" I know people don't usually mean the words unkindly, but I still don't like it.

[stripe]

:grouphug: I always hated that word, even when it was normal to use it. :grouphug:

[goldberry]

Thank you for posting. I will confess that I am someone who grew up with that word as slang, and didn't see anything wrong with it for a long time. I thought, "I don't mean it that way, and I would never say it to a person with disabilities, so what's the big deal." I really did feel at that time that people were overreacting about the word.

 

The video makes an excellent point about it perpetuating a stereotype that will ultimately color the view of those with disablities - whether you are actually referring to them or not. It still affects the general viewpoint and hence treatment of those with cognitive disabilities. It took me a long time to understand that, but the video gets the point across nicely.

 

I think most people are just like I was - thoughtless rather than malicious.

[Bang!Zoom!]

I don't think my daughter even knows that word. Probably should sit down and discuss this with her. Thanks for the reminder.

[Cassy]

It's a word that DS12 has brought back from school, insisting that 'everyone' uses it. DH and I have repeatedly asked him not to use it, explaining how offensive we find it. I played the video this evening while we were all around the kitchen table. DS12 just sat there quietly, and at the end said "I'm never going to use that word again". Thank you.

 

Cassy

[ravinlunachick]

Thank you for posting this. I have a husband who is a "Max," now, since his stroke. To me, he is still my husband. I've also become very sensitive to people who use the word "brain damaged" carelessly. As in, "Do I look like I'm brain damaged or something!?" I know people don't usually mean the words unkindly, but I still don't like it.

 

:grouphug: I wish your husband the best in his recovery! My father has also had several strokes, and is now completely bedridden, though his speech is unaffected. It's also worth noting that many of the current crop of injured soldiers have brain injuries, making TBI something we'll be dealing with as a nation for a long time.

 

Thank you for posting. I will confess that I am someone who grew up with that word as slang, and didn't see anything wrong with it for a long time. I thought, "I don't mean it that way, and I would never say it to a person with disabilities, so what's the big deal." I really did feel at that time that people were overreacting about the word.

 

The video makes an excellent point about it perpetuating a stereotype that will ultimately color the view of those with disablities - whether you are actually referring to them or not. It still affects the general viewpoint and hence treatment of those with cognitive disabilities. It took me a long time to understand that, but the video gets the point across nicely.

 

I think most people are just like I was - thoughtless rather than malicious.

 

I think it's brave of you to admit to using it, and I'm glad you've seen the light, so to speak. :D

 

It's a word that DS12 has brought back from school, insisting that 'everyone' uses it. DH and I have repeatedly asked him not to use it, explaining how offensive we find it. I played the video this evening while we were all around the kitchen table. DS12 just sat there quietly, and at the end said "I'm never going to use that word again". Thank you.

 

Cassy

 

That's awesome! Sometimes all we need is a little perspective from the other side, huh?

[Ester Maria]

Every word has its history.

 

The words "idiot" or "imbecile", for example, have been used in official medical classification of certain ranges of cognitive impairment.

"Retarded" is a latinism and it was used in the context of cognitive impairment which was perceived as a cognitive development at a slower than a regular speed, thus making those individuals "not on time" (retarded, tardiness, it is all about the same root) in their development.

Same thing with "precocious", pre-cocious, "matured ("cooked") before its time" to describe some individuals on the other end of the speed of acquiring new skills.

The word "stupid" was about being stunned to the point of being senseless, about being thoroughly confounded.

 

All of those words, and all other words in our languages, have their history.

 

But the words, other than their history and the original context of their genesis, are also lively and get adapted by each society in time and in space in different ways. Language is a vivid organism, in such a way, in continuous development. Many, MANY words have become almost completely detached in many speakers' minds from the context of their genesis and their original meanings. They simply mean, on a broad scale, something else today.

 

"Blind" or "narrow-sighted" are used as insults too... yet they remain a part of the (pseudo-)medical terminology and nobody bats an eye about that.

We all use "stupid" in situations which have nothing to do with being struck.

And so forth.

 

I shiver at the attempts to "clean" the language of all those "unclean" words and I shiver at the dictatorship of "PCese" that has come up with many absurd and inadequate constructs.

My emotional reaction to those attempts would be the best described as... scorn. Not acceptance, not even neutrality. Active scorn. You cannot regulate a language. You can teach that it is not nice to offend *in general*, no matter what words you use, and you can teach proper manners at that - but to wage a war on specific words, or words with their historicity in general, is not an attitude I accept, or even respect.

 

We teach children to try to be nice and to try not to insult. In situations in which specific words or expressions would be too loaded, to refrain from them. But I do not teach them censorship, I do not teach them to write off the history of words, nor do I call them out on every instance of a "problematic" word.

 

I also try to instill in them the love of precision and clear thinking and I hope that will be their ultimate arbiter in how they talk about things. And if they believe that, etymologically and as far as capturing the essence of the phenomenon, "retardation" is the most suitable term to explain some of what they mean, I am okay with that. As long as it is not used with an intention of offending and in offending contexts, I see nothing wrong at all, per se, in the word.

Edited March 7, 2012 by Ester Maria

[mom2abcd]

It's a word that DS12 has brought back from school, insisting that 'everyone' uses it. DH and I have repeatedly asked him not to use it, explaining how offensive we find it. I played the video this evening while we were all around the kitchen table. DS12 just sat there quietly, and at the end said "I'm never going to use that word again". Thank you.

 

Cassy

 

So cool! Thanks for sharing. Sometimes it takes a few methods to "get through" to people.

 

I wonder how many generations of parents have disliked that excuse that "everyone" acts in whichever way parents are calling them on. Parenting isn't easy, is it?

[ravinlunachick]

EsterMaria, I'm sorry to read that. :(

 

Perhaps you missed the point that the word "retarded" is actually STILL a medical diagnosis. Many children still have that on their charts. It doesn't matter from what Latin root it is derived. Using the term in a derogatory manner is disrepectful.

 

Maybe I have you mixed up with another poster, and if so, I'm sorry. But, iirc, you are Jewish. Do you not find the term "jewed down" (meaning haggled for a cheaper price) bothersome?

 

No one is trying to clean the language or mandate anything, for goodness sake. We are simply asking for some kindness and consideration. There's plenty of other words to use that aren't offensive.

[Ester Maria]

Do you not find the term "jewed down" (meaning haggled for a cheaper price) bothersome?

No. :)

I even joked with that one myself once.

[happi duck]

Thanks for posting.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Slurs that comment on a person's appearance, intelligence, orientation, or upbringing are not allowed in this house.

 

Whatever 'retarded' means in Latin or however it's used in college or other countries is entirely irrelevant in my under-educated Midwestern city. Here it means the insult only. We only use three-syllable words if we're insulting people, here. When we say what we precisely mean we usually only need one or two syllables. So the natives here don't mean anything intellectual when they call a person a retard.

 

There are some words that can bring another person to his knees. There are some words that can cause a human to vomit if they've been said often enough with enough hate. It's not politically correct to relegate these words to a more ignorant and unkind time as we press on with greater love and respect for our fellow man. It's right to do that. When we know better, we do better.

 

Que_r. Fagg_t. Nigg_r. Retard. Sp_c. Chi_k. Whor_. B*tch. These words are daggers.

 

I'm not one for corporal punishment, as a general rule, but my children know that I will wash their mouths out with soap if I ever hear them use any of these words. Some people say, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." That's a lie. Some words are strong. Some words have power to destroy a person.

 

My friend in fifth grade killed himself because he'd hard the word "fag" one too many times. His name was Josh. He was very intelligent, wore square glasses and plaid pants and had beautiful curly brown hair. And he went home and died one day because of all the laughing children who called him a fag. Other children have ended their lives over the word "retard."

 

Not everything can be educated away. Hate is hate. Not every word can be reclaimed by those who love the victims. Ree (Pioneer Woman) tried to do that with the word 'retard' by calling her beloved brother a retard. I understand the motivation but it just fails.

 

What can help is for the nice people who mean no harm to learn to go out of their way to do good. Model good behavior. Exemplify righteousness. Don't contribute to the normalization of mockery by joining in or merely allowing it to pass. Stand up for the weak. Let an awkward moment happen, let the laughter die, while you say, "I hope you're joking but I'm sure he doesn't think so. He's not 'retard,' his name is Joe, and my friends treat people as people."

 

If the good people allow it (or do it!) the bad people have no reason not to continue. All that is needed for evil to prevail is for good men to do nothing.

[Ester Maria]

Ester Maria, I am surprised at your insistence in this matter. Saddened, really. You obviously don't have a mentally retarded child.

Why? I don't use it. I just don't like being "prescribed" not to use words, especially selectively. I'm okay with saying let's not offend each other *in general*, but waging war on words is... not my cup of tea.

[ravinlunachick]

No. :)

I even joked with that one myself once.

 

All righty then. I don't have it in me to debate this online. The last time I tried was an emotional disaster for me. I'll just say that I'm saddened and leave it at that.

 

 

Tibbie Dunbar, that was a WONDERFUL post! Brava! :hurray:

[Mom0012]

I've been rather shocked to see a charitable organization collecting funds for the "retarded" in front of Walmart a number of times over the years. They wear bright yellow vests that say something like "Help the Retarded". The word has evolved in such a way that it does make you cringe to hear it.

 

Lisa

[Ester Maria]

All righty then. I don't have it in me to debate this online. The last time I tried was an emotional disaster for me. I'll just say that I'm saddened and leave it at that.

:grouphug: I am sorry this is hard for you. I am a bit unusual in that I really do not have a problem with words per se, not even the ones which 'could' be loaded for me. I have a problem with intentional offenses *in general*, but not with specific words. If that makes sense.

[Aelwydd]

Every word has its history.

 

The words "idiot" or "imbecile", for example, have been used in official medical classification of certain ranges of cognitive impairment.

"Retarded" is a latinism and it was used in the context of cognitive impairment which was perceived as a cognitive development at a slower than a regular speed, thus making those individuals "not on time" (retarded, tardiness, it is all about the same root) in their development.

Same thing with "precocious", pre-cocious, "matured ("cooked") before its time" to describe some individuals on the other end of the speed of acquiring new skills.

The word "stupid" was about being stunned to the point of being senseless, about being thoroughly confounded.

 

All of those words, and all other words in our languages, have their history.

 

But the words, other than their history and the original context of their genesis, are also lively and get adapted by each society in time and in space in different ways. Language is a vivid organism, in such a way, in continuous development. Many, MANY words have become almost completely detached in many speakers' minds from the context of their genesis and their original meanings. They simply mean, on a broad scale, something else today.

 

"Blind" or "narrow-sighted" are used as insults too... yet they remain a part of the (pseudo-)medical terminology and nobody bats an eye about that.

We all use "stupid" in situations which have nothing to do with being struck.

And so forth.

 

I shiver at the attempts to "clean" the language of all those "unclean" words and I shiver at the dictatorship of "PCese" that has come up with many absurd and inadequate constructs.

My emotional reaction to those attempts would be the best described as... scorn. Not acceptance, not even neutrality. Active scorn. You cannot regulate a language. You can teach that it is not nice to offend *in general*, no matter what words you use, and you can teach proper manners at that - but to wage a war on specific words, or words with their historicity in general, is not an attitude I accept, or even respect.

 

We teach children to try to be nice and to try not to insult. In situations in which specific words or expressions would be too loaded, to refrain from them. But I do not teach them censorship, I do not teach them to write off the history of words, nor do I call them out on every instance of a "problematic" word.

 

I also try to instill in them the love of precision and clear thinking and I hope that will be their ultimate arbiter in how they talk about things. And if they believe that, etymologically and as far as capturing the essence of the phenomenon, "retardation" is the most suitable term to explain some of what they mean, I am okay with that. As long as it is not used with an intention of offending and in offending contexts, I see nothing wrong at all, per se, in the word.

 

I agree 100%. I do not agree with censorship, whether it's via official channels, or through public shaming. I just read an article about this today and they pointed out that by emphasizing "intellectual disabilities" that now there is already slang like "ID," to replace "retarded" since that is now off-limits.

 

Point being, when I use the word, it's NEVER in reference to someone with disabilities. I watched the video, and all I could think was, "Yes, lady, your son is beautiful, and I would never call him a retard, or any other demeaning term." I reserve that word for when I'm talking about something completely different-- a stupid person. Which a disabled person is not.

 

I understand the history of the word, and I understand that for many folks, retard equals mentally disabled person. However, that is not how it is interpreted by many others, and frankly, I think that if you start taking this word away, you have to start taking other words out of the English language as well, as Ester said. Imbecile, idiot, dumb, insane ("Is she insane?!"), depressed ("You're so depressing, man!"), lame, ("God, that is so freaking lame!!"), psycho, neurotic, gay, etc.

 

Are you all proposing to sanitize the English language from each one of these terms? Because they either once described a medical condition, or still do, and they are slang as well.

 

I for one, refuse to bow to censorship, no matter how morally well-packaged or good the intentions are. Please let it suffice to say, once again, that when I use the term "retard," it is never in reference to someone with actual mental disabilities.

[Aelwydd]

:grouphug: I am sorry this is hard for you. I am a bit unusual in that I really do not have a problem with words per se, not even the ones which 'could' be loaded for me. I have a problem with intentional offenses *in general*, but not with specific words. If that makes sense.

 

Same here.

[Ester Maria]

I agree 100%. I do not agree with censorship, whether it's via official channels, or through public shaming. I just read an article about this today and they pointed out that by emphasizing "intellectual disabilities" that now there is already slang like "ID," to replace "retarded" since that is now off-limits.

 

Point being, when I use the word, it's NEVER in reference to someone with disabilities. I watched the video, and all I could think was, "Yes, lady, your son is beautiful, and I would never call him a retard, or any other demeaning term." I reserve that word for when I'm talking about something completely different-- a stupid person. Which a disabled person is not.

 

I understand the history of the word, and I understand that for many folks, retard equals mentally disabled person. However, that is not how it is interpreted by many others, and frankly, I think that if you start taking this word away, you have to start taking other words out of the English language as well, as Ester said. Imbecile, idiot, dumb, insane ("Is she insane?!"), depressed ("You're so depressing, man!"), lame, ("God, that is so freaking lame!!"), psycho, neurotic, gay, etc.

 

Are you all proposing to sanitize the English language from each one of these terms? Because they either once described a medical condition, or still do, and they are slang as well.

 

I for one, refuse to bow to censorship, no matter how morally well-packaged or good the intentions are. Please let it suffice to say, once again, that when I use the term "retard," it is never in reference to someone with actual mental disabilities.

Thank you, Rebekah. Exactly.

[ravinlunachick]

The Spread the Word to End the Word campaign is not out to obliterate any words from the English Language. They aren't lobbying dictionary makers. The campaign is aimed at getting people to stop using it as an insult. As I said before (and as another poster admitted) most people have no idea that it is hurtful at all. This campaign is aimed at making them aware of the pain they cause when they use the word in a derogatory manner.

[Aelwydd]

The Spread the Word to End the Word campaign is not out to obliterate any words from the English Language. They aren't lobbying dictionary makers. The campaign is aimed at getting people to stop using it as an insult. As I said before (and as another poster admitted) most people have no idea that it is hurtful at all. This campaign is aimed at making them aware of the pain they cause when they use the word in a derogatory manner.

 

I understand that. But once again, are they going to insist on ending other terms I named as insults? I have several family members who suffer from mental illness. Should I begin a campaign to end the insulting use of terms like "insane" or "depressing" because these describe real people?

 

If not, why is this particular word given such attention? And what happens when the term "ID" becomes the new "R" word? This is a never-ending crusade, and there's really no satisfactory end to it.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Aelwydd, I don't like when people pick a target and call him "Gay" or "Psycho," either.

 

Sanitizing the speech, officially censoring people...we don't need more laws. You can't legislate morality, anyway. I don't think anyone should go to jail for being unkind. Free speech is free speech. But if society shuns them and makes them feel like the rude people they are for shouting epithets at people they don't like, well, I'm for that.

 

Public shaming for people who call children retards. Voluntary loss of friendship and networking opportunities for people who call the mentally ill "Psycho." Sponsors ending contracts when a radio show host calls a woman a slut and a prostitute. Totally on board with all of that.

[mamajag]

You can't "clean" a language. No matter what, people will find/create new slur words and use them. If they can't use the R word, they're going to use something else. It's because they're idiots, but just the same they'll do it. Getting rid of the word doesn't get rid of the hate and bigotry. It's probably smarter in the long run to reclaim the word for a positive purpose.

 

Until the last couple of years, I wasn't aware that it was considered a slur. Many groups in this area raise funds for occupational programs for the retarded, and that is exactly how the signs are worded. Now I'm kind of shocked they are using that word.

[Aelwydd]

Aelwydd, I don't like when people pick a target and call him "Gay" or "Psycho," either.

 

Sanitizing the speech, officially censoring people...we don't need more laws. You can't legislate morality, anyway. I don't think anyone should go to jail for being a [mean person]. Free speech is free speech. But if society shuns them and makes them feel like the [sucky mean people] they are for shouting epithets at people they don't like, well, I'm for that.

 

Public shaming for people who call children retards. Loss of friendship and networking for people who call the mentally ill "Psycho." Sponsors ending contracts when a radio show host calls a woman a slut and a prostitute. Totally on board with all of that.

 

Yes, I agree that jackassery should be recognized as such. However, I disagree that banning words entirely from one's vocabulary teaches one not to be insulting or rude. They just go and adopt another term altogether.

 

I personally believe a more productive focus should be on civil treatment, rather than on trying to disappear a word from one's lexicon.

Edited March 8, 2012 by Aelwydd

[Ester Maria]

The Spread the Word to End the Word campaign is not out to obliterate any words from the English Language. They aren't lobbying dictionary makers. The campaign is aimed at getting people to stop using it as an insult. As I said before (and as another poster admitted) most people have no idea that it is hurtful at all. This campaign is aimed at making them aware of the pain they cause when they use the word in a derogatory manner.

But how is a child hurt when "retard" is used as an insult in a whole different context, with whole different people?

How is my child hurt when "narrow-sighted" is used as an insult among some other people in some other context?

How am I hurt when somebody else, in some other context, says to somebody else: "Don't you jew me!"

 

That is what I do not get. The words have evolved to those other contexts, too. I am not talking about using those words in their "original" contexts in a deliberately offensive way. But the video claims that the child is hurt also when the word is used in those other contexts, as an insult, in accordance with its evolution into an insult. That is what I disagree with.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Rebekah, you quoted me before I edited out the "jackass" word from my post. :lol: I decided I'd gone too far with the irony...

 

mamajag, I disagree with your argument. It seems to imply that we should tell all the children who are being called 'retard' to be thankful because at least they're used to it. Fresh rude vocabulary would hurt more? Really?

[Aelwydd]

Rebekah, you quoted me before I edited out the "jackass" word from my post. :lol: I decided I'd gone too far with the irony...

 

I have to tell you, I have one very offended donkey right now. ;)

 

P.S. I'm happy to edit the quote if you like!

 

P.P.S. I hope my edits are non-offensive. :D

Edited March 8, 2012 by Aelwydd

[Lang Syne Boardie]

I have to tell you, I have one very offended donkey right now. ;)

 

P.S. I'm happy to edit the quote, if you like!

 

No, I don't care. LOL Apologize to the donkey for me. :lol:

[Hannah C.]

I'm one of those who grew up hearing the word "retarded" used as slang (by others my age, not by adults), and never as a word to describe someone with mental disabilities. I wasn't aware that it was still a medical diagnosis. That being said, I try not to use the word, as I know that it is seen as offensive - and after watching that beautiful video, I'm convinced even more that it is a word I should avoid. I wish I could say that I have absolutely never used the word "retarded" as slang, but I'm sure I have at least once.

 

I do use the words "idiotic" and "stupid" on occasion - I am never quite sure if those are okay, especially since I know that "idiotic" has roots similar to "retarded."

 

I try to avoid calling *people* such terms on principle (along with a host of other negative epithets) - it's almost always laws, events, or actions that I find so ridiculous. People are so much more than one action, or one facet of their being!

[Aelwydd]

No, I don't care. LOL Apologize to the donkey for me. :lol:

 

I did, but he is being extremely catty about it. Which is to say, he's acting like a female dog.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

You win! :D

[Aelwydd]

Ravin, all kidding aside, what I am trying to say is much like Ester said, the word has evolved to take on a meaning different from its origin.

 

I'm rabidly against PC-dictated language and censorship. But that doesn't mean I go around calling impaired/disabled persons the r-word, because that's just plain mean, and also something I'd never do. In my mind, the two concepts are radically different and opposed. Because folks on this board are very sensitive to it, I do not use it here. However, I do not agree that the word should be banned from the English language, anymore than all those other words should be, even the really crass and offensive ones.

 

I hope you can understand that my position is based on philosophical beliefs about freedom of speech, and not as a promotion of degrading or hateful speech.

[Ester Maria]

But that doesn't mean I go around calling impaired/disabled persons the r-word, because that's just plain mean, and also something I'd never do. In my mind, the two concepts are radically different and opposed. Because folks on this board are very sensitive to it, I do not use it here. However, I do not agree that the word should be banned from the English language, anymore than all those other words should be, even the really crass and offensive ones.

 

I hope you can understand that my position is based on philosophical beliefs about freedom of speech, and not as a promotion of degrading or hateful speech.

:iagree:

 

Emphasizing this in case it was not clear from my posts.

[mamajag]

Rebekah, you quoted me before I edited out the "jackass" word from my post. :lol: I decided I'd gone too far with the irony...

 

mamajag, I disagree with your argument. It seems to imply that we should tell all the children who are being called 'retard' to be thankful because at least they're used to it. Fresh rude vocabulary would hurt more? Really?

 

I neither said nor implied any of those things. I merely pointed out that once the R word is shamed out of usage there will be perversion of whatever the new PC term for these children is. It's going to happen, and they're going to be in the same boat with a different word. In other words, for all the change that happens, nothing will actually change. It will still hurt for them to hear "ID" used as a slur. Living in Mississippi I have watched this happen time and time again with racist slurs.

 

The only way to fight these things is to take ownership of the word in question, whether it's b_tch, sl_t, f_g, or r_tard. Let them make something of it that is good and positive and strong. Then when the next bigoted perversion comes along, they do the same. It's proactive, and it takes people out of the victim mentality.

 

Here the word isn't negative because they use it for all sorts of positive things that enable independent living, job skills, and advocacy for the services they need. It didn't occur to me until I started using the internet more that some considered the word on par with n_gger because of how it's used here.

[Word Nerd]

Ravin, all kidding aside, what I am trying to say is much like Ester said, the word has evolved to take on a meaning different from its origin.

 

I'm rabidly against PC-dictated language and censorship. But that doesn't mean I go around calling impaired/disabled persons the r-word, because that's just plain mean, and also something I'd never do. In my mind, the two concepts are radically different and opposed. Because folks on this board are very sensitive to it, I do not use it here. However, I do not agree that the word should be banned from the English language, anymore than all those other words should be, even the really crass and offensive ones.

 

I hope you can understand that my position is based on philosophical beliefs about freedom of speech, and not as a promotion of degrading or hateful speech.

 

:iagree: Your comments in this thread as well as Ester's are in line with my views on this topic. I usually don't admit it because this is such an emotionally charged topic.

[mamajag]

Ravin, all kidding aside, what I am trying to say is much like Ester said, the word has evolved to take on a meaning different from its origin.

 

I'm rabidly against PC-dictated language and censorship. But that doesn't mean I go around calling impaired/disabled persons the r-word, because that's just plain mean, and also something I'd never do. In my mind, the two concepts are radically different and opposed. Because folks on this board are very sensitive to it, I do not use it here. However, I do not agree that the word should be banned from the English language, anymore than all those other words should be, even the really crass and offensive ones.

 

I hope you can understand that my position is based on philosophical beliefs about freedom of speech, and not as a promotion of degrading or hateful speech.

 

:iagree:

[Mommy22alyns]

Definitely one of those words that will not be spoken here.