aggieamy Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 My sister has asked me to post this here and hopefully get some suggestions. She and I (along with DH and BIL) all are at our wits end and upset. We really need some advice. My niece is 7 yo and is bright, funny, and a lovable kid. She and Little Librarian are the best of friends and she vacations with us and spends every other weekend at our house and has since she was in diapers. Last year we started to notice that she tells this outlandish stories ("I was ice skating over at the neighbors house and fell through the ice. I almost died." Not true.) At the time we talked to her about telling stories like that and making sure that she tells people they are stories and not the truth. This summer we went on a long car trip and niece told my sister that while I was napping DH got mad at another driver and flipped him off. Not true. My sister confronted her about it and told her not to make up stories. The first week of school my sister gets a call from the school nurse that niece threw up and to come and get her. My sister gets her from school and as soon as they get home niece is all better and wants to leave for my house. She and my sister were supposed to come over that evening to scrapbook. Niece just made up the whole getting sick thing to get out of school. Her punishment for this was not getting to come over that evening and had to clean up all the dog poop in their backyard. That gives the background for today. During class this afternoon niece told her teacher she needed to talk to the school counselor about something private. She went in and told the counselor how her uncle (my husband) has been giving her pills to help her sleep but she can't sleep and sometimes she'll get more in the middle of the night. She watches this really scary show called Doctor Who over at our house and has horrible nightmares. The counselor was concerned and called my sister. The truth to it is that niece can't sleep so she gets a low dose of melatonin at both houses. Only one. Usually my sister or I are the one to give it to her - rarely DH or BIL. We do watch Doctor Who but we screen all the shows first and don't let her watch anything scary. BIL, my sister, and I confronted niece about this today when she got off the bus and confessed that she made the whole thing up because she was bored in class and wanted to get out of it. We talked to her again about the importance of always being truthful and how making up stories about her uncle could get him in a lot of trouble. I'm really sick and sadened by the whole situation. My sister is beside herself. She's so embarassed that niece would make these stories up and doesn't know what to do. Her punishment this weekend is not getting to come over to our house and do all the fun things we had planned. I know I'm rushing through this a bit. I'm very upset. I love that kid so much but I'm also worried about protecting my husband. What do you recommend doing with a kid like this. My sister has made her an appointment to see a family counselor in case there's some sort of underlying issue. I don't know what it could be but it was really the first thing she and I thought of doing. Has anyone dealt with anything like this? How do you fix this? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*lifeoftheparty* Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 My niece(8) is a liar too. Hers are not THAT bad, but she CONSTANTLY lies. Tells tall tales. I think she has been doing it for so long that she can't help it. She also does it to make herself look better/cooler or get attention. I'm sorry, but I would not let her over to my house again until the lying problem was fixed. This could get VERY serious. All it takes is ONCE. One time for her to make up something about you husband for him to lose a job, go to jail, and have his name tarnished for a VERY long time. There is NO WAY I would chance that. It stinks, but you gotta do what you gotta do. At her age, you should tell your niece why she isn't allowed over and what she needs to do in order to get that privilege back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lacie Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 I know that it is going to sound bad, and I am not trying to hint that your dh would do anything... but if a little girl ever said that he did, his reputation is gone. I would make sure that the girl is never alone with dh, ever... just to make sure that she can't make up a story about him. It sounds like she needs to talk to someone, kids make up stories but this sounds a bit extreme. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 I wouldn't have her over to my home again for a looooong time, and I would ensure that my dh was never alone with her. Her lies are growing. They're getting more serious, involving more authority figures. The damage to your family could be irrepairable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 A couple of things come to mind - she seems to lie for attention and to manipulate the situation (ie. get out of things). Her lies could cause great damage to people's reputations (as others have mentioned). I think she needs professional help. At the very least this could then be noted in her file at school so that they do not call CPS because of some of her stories. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeslieAnneLevine Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 It sounds like some professional help may be in order, not to fix her, but to see what's going on. I knew a boy who told outlandish stories and he was on the autism spectrum. I'm not trying to connect any dots here, it's just the first thing I thought of. Also, it sounds like she really doesn't like school. Are there other options your sister could look into? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grover Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 I'd be very worried about putting myself or my DH at risk of accusations too. These sound like more than the 'normal' lying stuff that a lot of kids do - I'd be looking for counselling and further investigation if my kids were telling these sorts of tales, particularly so that I could get a record that she is a liar so if accusations did come up they'd be treated with care. Then again if I sent a child like this off to a counsellor I'd be concerned about what she might tell the counsellor 'because she's bored' to get me in trouble. I certainly wouldn't be happy being alone with this child (or letting any other adult be alone with her either). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sputterduck Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 I wouldn't have her over to my home again for a looooong time, and I would ensure that my dh was never alone with her. Her lies are growing. They're getting more serious, involving more authority figures. The damage to your family could be irrepairable. I agree. It's very sad, but I agree. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aggieamy Posted September 9, 2011 Author Share Posted September 9, 2011 You guys are right on about me being worried about DH's reputation. That's one reason she's not over here this weekend. She's got an appointment with a counselor in two weeks and my sister is going to talk to the school counselor to get it on the record that none of that is true. Any other suggestions? I don't want to not ever have my niece over again but I can't put my DH at risk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 My niece(8) is a liar too. Hers are not THAT bad, but she CONSTANTLY lies. Tells tall tales. I think she has been doing it for so long that she can't help it. She also does it to make herself look better/cooler or get attention. I'm sorry, but I would not let her over to my house again until the lying problem was fixed. This could get VERY serious. All it takes is ONCE. One time for her to make up something about you husband for him to lose a job, go to jail, and have his name tarnished for a VERY long time. There is NO WAY I would chance that. It stinks, but you gotta do what you gotta do. At her age, you should tell your niece why she isn't allowed over and what she needs to do in order to get that privilege back. I have to agree. Protect your familiy first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 At this point, I'd say its an either/or. She could have your dh arrested. Visit her at her home, but I would not have her over at mine. And when visiting, *I* wouldn't be alone with her either. Unless and until she has some serious in depth counseling to deal with this, I just wouldn't consider it safe. Sucks to say that about a child, but doesn't change how I feel. ETA: When I say visit, I mean just you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aggieamy Posted September 9, 2011 Author Share Posted September 9, 2011 How do we go about getting this fixed though? What does her mom need to be doing? Ugh. I'm completely sick over this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 Start with counselling, and go from there. She may require someone more intensive than a counsellor, say a psychiatrist or psychologist, but its a place to start. What worries me is that she doesn't seem to have any guilt or shame associated with her lies, they were done to break her boredom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aggieamy Posted September 9, 2011 Author Share Posted September 9, 2011 What worries me is that she doesn't seem to have any guilt or shame associated with her lies, they were done to break her boredom. When we talked to her about it tonight she was remoseful. She did feel guilty about what happened tonight and was upset about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 If she is bored in school enough to make up stories that could get loved ones in serious trouble her needs are not being met at that particular school. My first though was "that kid needs to be tomato staked." Right there beside a parent all day every day. That may not be realistic since they don't homeschool. She also needs a creative outlet. If she is 7 and can't write (small motor skills) well or for long she needs a recording device so she can tell her stories. Her sleep disorder needs to be addressed by a physician. She may need a sleep study done. Unless otherwise told by a counselor or psychologist, lying needs to be dealt with in the severest consequences available. Whatever is appropriate for this particular family. The consequences should also fit the "crime." If she lies to get out of doing school, then she should have to do more school. The idea is to make it more desirable to just do what is expected instead of try to get out of it. Oh, she never need be alone with your dh. Ever. As it is now she might get the idea in her 20s to make allegations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amey311 Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 When we talked to her about it tonight she was remoseful. She did feel guilty about what happened tonight and was upset about it. Ahh, but is she upset about the lie, about being caught lying, about missing out on a fun evening? These are scary lies, and you're quite possibly going to have to get the school psychologist involved - some sort of behavior plan to deal with "I tell over the top lies so that I don't have to do my math work." Adding to all of this is the potential reinforcement that's coming from the lies - she tells some lie and it gets a huge reaction. You can't just ignore the lying because it's the lies aren't benign (if she told you stories regularly about playing in her room with a purple rabbit, you could choose to ignore her). :grouphug: I would let teacher/nurse/principal know that professionals are being consulted. Keep EXCELLENT records about who is where and when. School professionals are mandated reporters of child abuse, so it's possible that CPS may end up investigating if the lie gets scary enough. It's not the teacher's job to know when "Uncle Bob sometimes tickles me in funny places" is safe, unsafe, or a lie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sputterduck Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 Start with counselling, and go from there. She may require someone more intensive than a counsellor, say a psychiatrist or psychologist, but its a place to start. What worries me is that she doesn't seem to have any guilt or shame associated with her lies, they were done to break her boredom. Yeah, it's not normal to go to such extents to make up stories just to shake up the day and the people around you. At that age there should be a natural disinclination to do something as drastic as say you need to talk to the counselor about something private and make up a story to worry the counselor. That has danger in huge neon blinking signs all the heck over it. I feel bad for the girl but worse for her parents. I would be in despair with worry and I'm not inclined to worry all that much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bang!Zoom! Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 If the child needs to see a psych later down the road, that's going to require communication with the pediatrician. A excellent counselor would also recommend a full physical and blood work pronto to rule out any issues with health that could be creating this behind the scenes. Encourage mom to take her daughter to a pediatrician, or if she's out of range at her age, a good physician for a full workup and checkup. Many health issues you cannot see can cause erratic and dangerous behavior. PS: I'm really worried about a visit from CPS. Very worried. School counselors are mandated reporters, and if she stated she helps herself to unknown meds in the middle of the night....whew, that is highly in the range of a CPS report. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 This thread makes me sad. Obviously your niece is going through something - could be big issues, could just be a phase (I hate that about so many things when kids are having problems) - but thanks to the nasty climate of fear, especially about men and children, much of the advice is about how to minimize your risk instead of how to help. I think it's probably justified (I'm not saying any of it was wrong at all to give - quite the opposite) it just makes me sad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aggieamy Posted September 10, 2011 Author Share Posted September 10, 2011 A excellent counselor would also recommend a full physical and blood work pronto to rule out any issues with health that could be creating this behind the scenes. Encourage mom to take her daughter to a pediatrician, or if she's out of range at her age, a good physician for a full workup and checkup. Many health issues you cannot see can cause erratic and dangerous behavior. What kind of health issues could be causing this type of behavior? I'm really worried about a visit from CPS. Very worried. School counselors are mandated reporters, and if she stated she helps herself to unknown meds in the middle of the night....whew, that is highly in the range of a CPS report. When she called my sister she told her that the medicine niece was taking was melatonin and that she took it at both houses. She also told her that niece didn't have access to it at either house. My sister let her know that she everything niece was saying was a lie. If CPS shows up then I'll just have to deal with that when it happens. I'm not as worried about CPS as I am finding a solution to this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elizabeth in MN Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 Well, I'd make her apologize to everyone involved from the person she lied about to the person she lied to. Make the attention she gets from lying be *very* negative. When my daughter flirted with lying I made it very clear to her that if she became a liar I could not help her in situations. If she said someone hit her I wouldn't know if it was true or not, and then I couldn't talk to the parents of whomever hit her. That was enough to cure my child, but I am not sure it would work on your niece. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
butterflymommy Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 When we talked to her about it tonight she was remoseful. She did feel guilty about what happened tonight and was upset about it. If she were truly remorseful, she would stop. I agree with others and would take it further, no face to face contact until there is some kind of resolution. I would not have her to visit your house nor would I visit her at her house (either you or DH). There is just too much at stake. She could have you or your DH arrested, could start a CPS investigation and jeopardize your custody of your own child/ren. It just is not worth it, no matter how much you love her. She does need psychiatric help if for no other reason to have a record that she is lying compulsively. So start with finding a child psychologist/ psychiatrist and go from there. The risk of course is that she could start to manipulate the psychiatrist and start the lies there too, which could get very serious as psychs are mandated reporters to CPS. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*lifeoftheparty* Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 This thread makes me sad. Obviously your niece is going through something - could be big issues, could just be a phase (I hate that about so many things when kids are having problems) - but thanks to the nasty climate of fear, especially about men and children, much of the advice is about how to minimize your risk instead of how to help. I think it's probably justified (I'm not saying any of it was wrong at all to give - quite the opposite) it just makes me sad. I think she can help by removing the temptation. We went through some stuff with my nephew, he was doing stuff that was just not good for our son. We just told our family that since he was having issues, we would remove ourselves from the situation. That way, his parents and grandparents could get to work on fixing the problem and there was no risk of him doing something that would not only be bad for DS, but for him as well, KWIM? I mean, if the niece DID say something to ruin OP's husband or OP, then she will FOREVER be known as the compulsive lying brat that ruined OP's life. Who would want her around? How would Holidays be? She would NEVER be trusted again. And, if she grew up to realize how bad her deed was... how hard would it be for her to live with that? Could you live with yourself if you knew you RUINED someone's life just b/c of a stupid lie? So, it is a big help to remove themselves from the situation before it gets any worse. It stinks, but OP, you are not her parent. You are not her legal guardian. You are NOT responsible for her. You are responsible for YOUR husband and YOUR kids. Her parent(s) has to deal with this. Her parent(s) needs to get her help. This is just one of those hard things in life where you must choose: protect your (immediate) family or someone/something else. I mean, you can go see her periodically..... let her know that you still love her, support her, be there for her mother, etc. That will help, but you must put some distance, for a LITTLE while, so they can (hopefully) get to the root of the problem and fix it. At which time, you can slowly be part of her life again. The alternative is for her to go too far, ruin your life, and NEVER be a part of your life. After about 2 years of keeping some distance b/t our families and making sure that DS and nephew were ALWAYS supervised.... things have gotten better and the "issues" are almost forgotten, almost. We still keep a vigilant eye on him and make sure they are never alone together.... but at least it has moved to the back of our minds, and not the front, and things are like they were.... with that one "never alone" exception. I doubt that would be the case if we had not removed ourselves from the situation and something bad happened.... things would be a lot different now, if it had. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aggieamy Posted September 10, 2011 Author Share Posted September 10, 2011 She does need psychiatric help if for no other reason to have a record that she is lying compulsively. So start with finding a child psychologist/ psychiatrist and go from there. The risk of course is that she could start to manipulate the psychiatrist and start the lies there too, which could get very serious as psychs are mandated reporters to CPS. How would my sister go about protecting herself with niece seeing the counselor? My sister has been reading this thread and is obviously upset and worried. She's going Monday to talk to the school counselor, school nurse, and niece's teacher about the situation. She wants to get something documented that these things are not true and that niece now has a history of lying. Manipulative lying at that. At least twice now she's told the school nurse that she threw up to get out of school - once last year and once already this year. I want to make sure my sister is protected also. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bang!Zoom! Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 If that were my child, I'd want a full blood panel done for starters. If all comes back clean on those, I'd work on diet. Think of all the stories of the children here that moms have told about behavior and diet. It's a easy thing to rule out while working on a full treatment plan for healthy living. Nutritional and food issues can display in an endless array of negative ways. I'd think a wise pediatrician would also screen for any undiscovered drug abuse use as a matter of caution. I think also, that when doing a full blood panel, one has to request the Dr. to do the "full" series of vitamin B family. I had to request a "full" panel once and it came back with only 1 tested. (Vitamin B 12) When the "full" panel of B vitamins came back, it was only then that a discovery was made that my system was lacking in the B vitamin family. Treating the deficiency made all the difference in the world for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little Nyssa Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 Getting a family counselor to see the family is right on. Make sure, sure, sure that the lying behavior is documented and that school and pediatrician are aware of it. I don't want to scare you but I knew a family where CPS removed children from the home on the basis of what a child said-- unfortunately a dramatic child who often lied to get attention and manipulate. It was very hard for everyone to sort out what was real and what was lies. In any case she & sib were gone from the family for several months. This was a terrible experience. I think that if school had known about the habit of lying, the situation would have been handled much differently. :grouphug: Some of the PPs have said to cut off access to the child... I sympathize with this idea, but I have to point out that this would not necessarily keep your own family safe, because she could always lie about something that happened in the past when she WAS with you. Like it or not you are connected. Best wishes to you as you all cope with this. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 If that were my child, I'd want a full blood panel done for starters. I'm sorry, but I would have no idea what "a full blood panel" is. I have honestly never heard the phrase. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 I'm sorry, but I would have no idea what "a full blood panel" is. I have honestly never heard the phrase. A full blood panel is just a CBC (complete blood count). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 A full blood panel is just a CBC (complete blood count). When I googled it, it was used casually to mean who knows what (e.g. "full blood panel for my Yorkie who just miscarried or not?"), and most were on boards and in articles having to do with dogs. :) I am frequently regaled by requests for blood tests, but given where I work, I spend a lot of time explaining we don't have tests for alien blood, CIA implanted chips, or neurotoxins coming from the ceiling lights.:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
specialmama Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 Kids who lie have so much power. They can destroy families, lives, friendships, everything. As hard as it will be, you really ought to limit contact. She does need counselling, and I'm really glad that her family sees that. If left unchecked, who knows where that girl would be 10 years from now. :grouphug: Believe it or not, I truly can sympathize with everything you're going through. :grouphug: We had to cut ties with dear friends who made up horrible lies and calculated plots including producing phoney evidence to scare my dd into believing someone was going to kill her. I'm sorry, but no kid should have that kind of power without being hauled into some serious counselling to fix it. :grouphug: Here's hoping your niece can get some help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aggie Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 Getting a family counselor to see the family is right on. Make sure, sure, sure that the lying behavior is documented and that school and pediatrician are aware of it. I don't want to scare you but I knew a family where CPS removed children from the home on the basis of what a child said-- unfortunately a dramatic child who often lied to get attention and manipulate. It was very hard for everyone to sort out what was real and what was lies. In any case she & sib were gone from the family for several months. This was a terrible experience. I think that if school had known about the habit of lying, the situation would have been handled much differently. :grouphug: Some of the PPs have said to cut off access to the child... I sympathize with this idea, but I have to point out that this would not necessarily keep your own family safe, because she could always lie about something that happened in the past when she WAS with you. Like it or not you are connected. Best wishes to you as you all cope with this. :grouphug: This was my thought, too. Since she's not getting any attention from you or your dh, and she knows she's in trouble at home, I'd be expecting her to tell a *huge* lie in the next week or two. I don't have any ideas for you, but if a child of mine was telling lies like this, she wouldn't leave my side until the problem was solved. This is serious and has the potential to rip her own family apart.:grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
masaki Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 OK, yes this is a serious situation. Kids shouldn't lie...but sometimes they do. It sounds like she's getting a lot of attention, even if it's the bad kind of attention, over her lying. This little girl isn't a bad person. She has a bad habit. I think your family is right in wanting to speak with a seasoned pediatrician and school counselor who can give you some perspective on this situation. This is most likely a phase and needs to be dealt with calmly, but firmly. The adults in this situation should be careful of how you communicate your disappointment in the behavior and what your expectations of her future behavior are. What I'm saying is, be careful here that you don't make this situation any worse by overreacting. Yes, it's terrible that she could have gotten your dh in serious trouble. However, cutting her off from part of her family seems cold. And it's no guarantee that she wouldn't make something up again. She needs help, and dare I say it, some compassion? You guys sound like a loving family, I wish you all the best in getting through this situation. Marilyn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyK Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 While I don't have any experience with the serious lying, the insomnia, restlessness and boredom, and impulsivity are all familiar. On our quest to figure out if ADD was involved, we had allergy blood tests done by a naturopath. Eliminating certain foods changed mood and behavior drastically. It is worth investigating. Around that time, I read the book the Explosive Child which wasn't right on point. But I still got a valuable insight from it -- with certain problems, increasing the punishment doesn't help. The kid can feel bad about it, yet still keeps doing it, so it actually can get worse with punishment. In those sorts of situations, it is important to get at the root cause (mood disorder, allergies, whatever). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasar31629 Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 I would seek professional help for her and have documentation of these instances. I would attend a group counseling session with the family stating our fears and concerns and be sure it was documented and kept on file both with the therapist/etc. as well as my personal files. I wouldn't cut ourselves out of her life, but I'd be sure we were protected as well as could be. This would be tough. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeslieAnneLevine Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 If she were truly remorseful, she would stop. I have trouble believing this to be true. She could have psychological or neurological issues that prevent her from just stopping, but she could still feel true remorse for having hurt people she loves. The lies also seem to be related to school. I am not saying school is the only issue, but a break from it while working out the other issues might be helpful, if that's at all possible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKapers Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 Oh Wow :grouphug: I agree with the others, I would visit neice at a different location than your house. :grouphug: to your sister. This sounds incredibly tough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaBearMO Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 When we talked to her about it tonight she was remoseful. She did feel guilty about what happened tonight and was upset about it. I hate to say this, but are you sure she wasn't lying? She's obviously keenly aware of how the adults around her are responding, so is she remorseful or is she aware she needs to show you something that seems remorseful? What a sticky situation your family is in, so sorry! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaBearMO Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 (edited) What kind of health issues could be causing this type of behavior? A host of things, from very scary (brain tumor) to less scary (endocrine), to lifelong (mental health disorder) to treatable (chemical imbalance), to it being just a phase too. I wasn't going to post this as it's personal in nature, but unfortunately you also can't rule out that she's been abused and this is her way of crying out for help. Not that I think that would be your family members, but our cousins daughter did almost the same thing and had been abused (sexually) at 4 by a family friend. She started acting out (lies, manipulation, etc.) at 5, and it took two years to get it out of her what happened and it was devastating to the family. She's been in therapy now for five years and is doing much better. Edited September 10, 2011 by MamaBearMO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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