Coffeetime Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 (edited) Just for the record, I don't think your son is a sociopath. I totally understand a 10 year old boy doing something stupid- because let's face it, 10 year old boys don't have a very good grasp on "cause and effect". I think what most of us are concerned about is YOUR attitude that it was okay for him to deal with his frustration with the dogs this way. It sends your son a very, very bad message and *that* is a scary thing. My reaction to this would have been completely different. And at this point I think your best option with your neighbor is to go crawling over there, completely contrite and full of apologies that sound a little more convincing and real. I'd make my son apologize as well. And, yes, I'd probably be carrying a gift basket. ;) Edited September 2, 2011 by Coffeetime Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parker Martin Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 (edited) It was a mistake to bring up the barking at that time. I would take the BB gun away from my son, at least for a time, and there would be serious consequences. He would also need to apologize to the neighbor both in person and by letter. ETA: I write that as someone who is not a dog person but definitely a gun person. Edited September 2, 2011 by Parker Martin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boscopup Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Ds has been taught to never harm living creatures for sport. He would be in HUGE trouble for shooting at any living creature for sport. Maybe that is where I get murky...it wasn't for sport. Here's another thing to think about. Does a dog have the cognitive ability to know that it's annoying you? Whose fault is it that the dog is disturbing you? The dog is barking because its owner lets it. That's not the dog's fault. The dog is being a dog. Dogs naturally bark. You can't fault a dog for doing what it's designed to do. The dog is not purposely annoying you. So the proper way to handle a situation where a dog is disturbing you is to a) talk to your neighbor, and b) call animal control. Shooting at a dog for such a shallow reason is just one step away from taking vengeance on another human being. Seriously, it scares me that your son would do such a thing, and it scares me even more that you would think it is at all ok! I'm a country-living gal, and we have guns and livestock. Yes, we would shoot a dog that was attacking our livestock or our neighbor's cattle (thankfully, we've never had to). We would NOT shoot a dog that wasn't harming another animal or human. Our across-the-street neighbor had a dog that kept pooping in our driveway. I hated that. It annoyed me. But it's not the dog's fault his owner lets him loose! It's the neighbor's fault. And again, regardless, SHOOTING SOMETHING IS NOT THE ANSWER. Barking, pooping in a driveway... those are such petty things! If the dog was mauling a child, THEN it'd be ok to shoot it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sputterduck Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 The dogs are not hurt at all. I don't even know if they were hit. Scarlett, this doesn't sound like you at all. :confused: Is everything all right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I'm with the shocked and horrified (by the OP's attitude). There have been threads on this forum whether academic underachievers with lax parents give the rest of the homeschoolers a bad rep. A child who doesn't read well at 10, or who can do only basic math. I might get flamed for this, but homeschoolers with this kind of attitude do give the rest of us a bad rep (and scare me), not the ones who are academically behind. After all, we are all different, with different levels of drive, ability, priorities, and focus. I just hope that we are all humane. :leaving: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sputterduck Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 No, I am not missing the point. Point is you all think it is horrible to shoot a dog with a bb (sort of) gun. Even if it's an airsoft gun, it's not okay. You can still take out an eye. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatCyndiGirl Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 OP, it's good that you started this thread. You wanted perspective and you got it. I've been here a couple of years and have known you to be a normal person and a caring wife and mother. It's not that I think that it's good that you came here "because I am right and you are wrong and I can set you straight", but because you really can't seem to understand the other POV here and maybe from hearing it here it gives you more perspective on how your neighbour might be feeling today. I do think that if you take the dog's behaviour (excessive barking) out of the equation it may become more clear to you. It may take some time to think about.....it may take some sleep.....or you may never change your mind, who knows, but from what I've known from your online WTM persona, you ARE a kind, caring person who can relate to your neighbour in a way that is livable for BOTH of you. :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I didn't say that I thought the boy was a sociopath. I don't even know him. I was just pointing out what society-in-general thinks of boys who are inclined to do such things, because society-in-general will call CPS or the police. The OP needs to be prepared for that possibility. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Yeah, I'm thinking this is over the top. I agree. Nothing about this is making me think you boy will grow up to be a serial killer:) Obviously you don't really care that he shot the dog. It's not a big deal to you, you hate the dog anyway, and you just can't muster remorse. Fair enough. I appreciate your honesty. But now you need to decide how much you care about your son's reputation. Because as much as it may be "over the top" I think that it is very likely that your son is going to be talked about and watched closely now in the neighborhood. He's made himself vulnerable and you have made it worse by minimizing his behavior. If you don't care, if you are moving soon, if your son is so mild mannered that you just aren't concerned, then really, it's not likely that CPS would really be called. So let it go. If you do care, if you are concerned about people deciding your son is "troubled" and that its mostly cause of his nutso Mom (not saying it is, or that he is, but I know how neighbors are) then you need to make nice in a big way. Gift basket for the dogs would seriously be my plan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 Here's another thing to think about. Does a dog have the cognitive ability to know that it's annoying you? Whose fault is it that the dog is disturbing you? The dog is barking because its owner lets it. That's not the dog's fault. The dog is being a dog. Dogs naturally bark. You can't fault a dog for doing what it's designed to do. The dog is not purposely annoying you. So the proper way to handle a situation where a dog is disturbing you is to a) talk to your neighbor, and b) call animal control. Shooting at a dog for such a shallow reason is just one step away from taking vengeance on another human being. Seriously, it scares me that your son would do such a thing, and it scares me even more that you would think it is at all ok! I'm a country-living gal, and we have guns and livestock. Yes, we would shoot a dog that was attacking our livestock or our neighbor's cattle (thankfully, we've never had to). We would NOT shoot a dog that wasn't harming another animal or human. Our across-the-street neighbor had a dog that kept pooping in our driveway. I hated that. It annoyed me. But it's not the dog's fault his owner lets him loose! It's the neighbor's fault. And again, regardless, SHOOTING SOMETHING IS NOT THE ANSWER. Barking, pooping in a driveway... those are such petty things! If the dog was mauling a child, THEN it'd be ok to shoot it! He didn't shoot the dog for vengence. He shot it hoping it would shut it up. Seriously. He doesn't 'blame' the dogs. He just wanted them to shut up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sputterduck Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Well, I guess basically she was asking for an explanation. That was the best I had. I wasn't actually trying to put the blame on her. Just an explanation for the bb usage. :tongue_smilie: Honestly, I didn't know the police could get called. If they do, I will face the music and apologize and again repeat ds won't be doing that again. But yeah, I hate dogs that bark. If I had a dog that barked all the time and my neighbor shot it with bb gun...I would get rid of dog. You know, if the police get called an apology might not matter anymore. They can charge him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 Scarlett, this doesn't sound like you at all. :confused: Is everything all right? Yeah. :glare: I just really hate those dogs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lea1 Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 The OP's son is not a sociopath. He simply did something that was deemed OK by both of his parents and had been done before by his father. The OP still does not think it was that bad of a thing to do and I'm sure her son understands this. When we were building our house, someone shot a BB gun at it and the BB broke through the first pane of glass on a window, broke the second pane and was sitting inside the window, between the two panes. Clearly BB's certainly can and do cause harm. Clearly the intent (with parent approval) was to cause pain to the dog to hopefully stop it from barking, as this had worked before. There are three little yippy dogs living next door to us. As soon as they are let out of their house into their yard, they immediately run to the fence and it is non-stop barking until someone finally comes out and retrieves them. We just ignore, ignore, ignore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 You know, if the police get called an apology might not matter anymore. They can charge him. I meant apologize to the police. And I don't think any one is getting charged with anything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
curlylocks Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 If you don't care, if you are moving soon, if your son is so mild mannered that you just aren't concerned, then really, it's not likely that CPS would really be called. I don't understand the logic...CPS *could* be called whether or not any of these things are true. :confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 The OP's son is not a sociopath. He simply did something that was deemed OK by both of his parents and had been done before by his father. The OP still does not think it was that bad of a thing to do and I'm sure her son understands this. When we were building our house, someone shot a BB gun at it and the BB broke through the first pane of glass on a window, broke the second pane and was sitting inside the window, between the two panes. Clearly BB's certainly can and do cause harm. Clearly the intent (with parent approval) was to cause pain to the dog to hopefully stop it from barking, as this had worked before. There are three little yippy dogs living next door to us. As soon as they are let out of their house into their yard, they immediately run to the fence and it is non-stop barking until someone finally comes out and retrieves them. We just ignore, ignore, ignore. Shooting your glass had not purpose. As misguided as it appears to have been, there was very clear purpose by shooting at the dog. From a long distance btw. And no I do not think it was that bad of a thing to do. But he won't be doing it again since it is clearly seen as a horror. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
curlylocks Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 He didn't shoot the dog for vengence. He shot it hoping it would shut it up. Seriously. He doesn't 'blame' the dogs. He just wanted them to shut up. So he "snapped" ?? :confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WishboneDawn Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Yeah, but.......not sure how to say sorry any more than I already did. When I said, 'I'm sorry, I will tell him not to do it again,' She just stood there. She wanted to know you took it seriously and what you would do with your son to ensure it didn't happen again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 So he "snapped" ?? :confused: No. He shot at them hoping a sting would make them go away and stop barking. Seriously people. I get that you don't agree with me. I get that this should never been done again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 She wanted to know you took it seriously and what you would do with your son to ensure it didn't happen again. Ds will not do it again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 You son could be charged with animal cruelty at the least. He broke the law, and showed serious lack of compassion. I'd take that gun way for good. He shot them not in self defense, but out of either anger or frustration. If any of my children used a fire arm in that manner they would never see another fire arm again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I don't understand the logic...CPS *could* be called whether or not any of these things are true. :confused: My point isn't that she should make nice because CPS might be called. I think it's unlikely, at this point, she can't control that. I think she should make nice because her son did something that many people would hold against her son, and it just makes life hard to have people think you are troubled/aggressive/uncaring etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 You son could be charged with animal cruelty at the least. He broke the law, and showed serious lack of compassion. I'd take that gun way for good. He shot them not in self defense, but out of either anger or frustration. If any of my children used a fire arm in that manner they would never see another fire arm again. I don't think he was angry or frustrated.....he thought a sting would make them shut up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I talk to the trees Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Yeah. :glare: I just really hate those dogs. Hmmm....I really hate my dh's bully of a boss who has a tendency to ramble on and on and on about nothing. It's so annoying! Maybe I'll just pop him a few times with a bb gun! No harm there, right, since I just want him to shut up? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 My point isn't that she should make nice because CPS might be called. I think it's unlikely, at this point, she can't control that. I think she should make nice because her son did something that many people would hold against her son, and it just makes life hard to have people think you are troubled/aggressive/uncaring etc. Yes I agree. Waiting for dh so we can go together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 Hmmm....I really hate my dh's bully of a boss who has a tendency to ramble on and on and on about nothing. It's so annoying! Maybe I'll just pop him a few times with a bb gun! No harm there, right, since I just want him to shut up? Again comparing humans with dogs. :glare: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
curlylocks Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 My point isn't that she should make nice because CPS might be called. I think it's unlikely, at this point, she can't control that. I think she should make nice because her son did something that many people would hold against her son, and it just makes life hard to have people think you are troubled/aggressive/uncaring etc. I'm sorry but I don't think "making nice" is going to "cut it"...I don't even know how you start that conversation. "I'm sorry my son shot at your dog, but the dog wouldn't shut up. Here's a gift basket. Have a nice day." :confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I talk to the trees Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Again comparing humans with dogs. :glare: You really need a piano dropped on you to get the point, don't you? This is animal cruelty you are dealing with. Perhaps you need to take your son's acting out a bit more seriously before he DOES harm a human. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sputterduck Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I meant apologize to the police. And I don't think any one is getting charged with anything. I meant that apologizing to the police might not really matter. He did something that he could be charged for. Apologies don't change that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 You really need a piano dropped on you to get the point, don't you? This is animal cruelty you are dealing with. Perhaps you need to take your son's acting out a bit more seriously before he DOES harm a human. Yeah, I don't need a piano and I don't think he was 'acting out.' He wanted a barking dog to stop barking. That is all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 I meant that apologizing to the police might not really matter. He did something that he could be charged for. Apologies don't change that. Oh. Nothing I can do about it now....even if that happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momof3littles Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I think the best possible thing we could hope for is that this is a 10 yo boy who showed a major, severe, concerning lack of forethought vs. something more nefarious. Hopefully he just didn't think through the potential risk and consequences. If it is immaturity/lack of forethought, at the very least, I'd be taking away the bb gun for quite some time. As in, probably a few years. I'm sure you'll disagree. I'm trying to assign the best possible "cause" here that I can, since we're dealing w/ a 10 yo. The lack of forethought would concern me about his decision-making skills that I would remove the gun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
curlylocks Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 You really need a piano dropped on you to get the point, don't you? This is animal cruelty you are dealing with. Perhaps you need to take your son's acting out a bit more seriously before he DOES harm a human. :iagree: A man from my home state recently plead guilty to animal cruelty and served a 10-day jail sentence...just sayin. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 If someone shot my dog with a BB gun, I'd call the police. Period. And no, I don't think that apologizing to the police would result in no charges. As you've seen in this thread, its taken seriously by pretty much everyone else, and is worthy of criminal prosecution. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 I think the best possible thing we could hope for is that this is a 10 yo boy who showed a major, severe, concerning lack of forethought vs. something more nefarious. If it is immaturity/lack of forethought, at the very least, I'd be taking away the bb gun for quite some time. As in, probably a few years. I'm sure you'll disagree. I'm trying to assign the best possible "cause" here that I can, since we're dealing w/ a 10 yo. The lack of forethought would concern me about his decision-making skills that I would remove the gun. Well, we can agree on that. I don't like guns. Wouldn't have one in the house at all. And this one is going back to his dad's tonight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Perhaps it would be easier to think of in terms of boundaries. Neither you nor your ds are responsible in anyway for your neighbor's dogs. Neither of you are responsible for enforcing any noise or nuisance laws either. He took the law into his own hands in a way by trying to discipline the dog. If he has a problem with the neighbor, he should go to you. If you have a problem with the neighbor you should go to Animal control or the city council or whatever is set up in your area to handle things like this. Your neighbor handled things correctly. She did not cross boundaries by disciplining your son, though I might suspect that she was tempted. She went to you. If she thinks that you are not handling it correctly, she has the freedom to go to authorities who will take a look a the situation, though as others have said, they may not do anything. Apologies really have nothing to do with it. Neither does remorse. Though both of these might have something to do with your internal handling of this as well as your relationship with your neighbors. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 If someone shot my dog with a BB gun, I'd call the police. Period. And no, I don't think that apologizing to the police would result in no charges. As you've seen in this thread, its taken seriously by pretty much everyone else, and is worthy of criminal prosecution. Ok, I wasnt' saying that I thought I could avoid charges by apologizing to neighbor or police. I just said that is all I could do at this point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sputterduck Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Yeah, I don't need a piano and I don't think he was 'acting out.' He wanted a barking dog to stop barking. That is all. I don't think he was acting out, either. He was doing what his father showed him to do when you have a barking dog. He's 10. He doesn't know not to copy his parents. That's exactly why I think it's important for a parent to teach him a lesson about guns that he'll take seriously. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwickimom Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 We are very pro gun here and we hunt and we have shot at a neighbors dog...but the dog was on our property chasing our deer and running them into our fences. It was endangering our pets lives and was off leash. That being said...I would severely punish my kids for using a bb gun to shoot a neighbors dog for barking reasons. We only use guns to hunt or self protection. We also wouldn't aim a gun at anything we weren't OK with killing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 If their light was shining in his eyes while he was playing baseball, would it be ok for him to shoot our their light? NO. He is not allowed by law to destroy or damage their property. Their dog is their property. He attempted to damage it. Maybe that will make more sense to you, since you have no reasonable amount of emphathy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I would be having ds apologize and take away the bbs. bbs do hurt, and if she wanted to she could call the police on him for animal cruelty. I had the police get involved when ds got shot with a bb. That boy was charged with assault with a weapon. Serious charge. BB guns should not be in the hands of anyone that does not use on responsibly. Annoying barking dogs or not, I would be furious if I was given that as an excuse for a child shooting my pet! And would be more inclined to involve the law after hearing a parent excuse such behaviour. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 If your area has animal control then complain to them about the incessant barking. If you had a good relationship with your neighbor I would have suggested a bark collar (there are citronella ones that do not hurt the dog) but I think you have burned all bridges with that neighbor in how you've handled this. Your xh might have bought the bb gun but you get to decide if it is used at your house. :iagree: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WishboneDawn Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 (edited) Yeah. :glare: I just really hate those dogs. :D For the record, I don't think you or your son are doomed or horrible folk. I just think your past issues with the dogs have drained you of empathy for your neighbour on this one. It happens. I once had a neighbour with a beagle that was never leashed and came over to our house to tip over our compost and bay at our dog when she was on her chain. When it was finally hit and killed by car I had not a bit of remorse. So you've just got to take my word for this and fake it. :D Apologize to the neighbours for not taking it seriously and assure her that your son will be punished. Not that he won't do it again, but that he will be punished. She just needs to feel you take her feelings seriously and will do something about it. That's generally what people are looking for in this situation. ETA: I get that your son won't do it again, it's just that the neighbour needs to be assured that you're taking steps to make sure that doesn't happen, that's all. :grouphug: Edited September 2, 2011 by WishboneDawn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChrissySC Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 16 pages of deferring and not being accountable. Why is it so hard to admit an action was wrong and that as a parent it requires some consequence? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I talk to the trees Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 (edited) Yeah, I don't need a piano and I don't think he was 'acting out.' He wanted a barking dog to stop barking. That is all. All right. I want my college-age neighbors to turn their music down. Can I go shoot their car stereos? (See, no comparison to humans here!) NO! Why not? Those stereos are the property of my (admittedly noisy) neighbors. If my dd threw a rock at their car as they passed, I'd be apologizing all over myself, and I'd see that any damage done was worked off by her in some way (raking leaves or paying from her allowance, etc...) Your cavalier attitude about the whole thing sends the message to your son that violence and property damage is fine under the right circumstances. Of course, your neighbor sees the dogs as more than just property (a concept that you clearly cannot wrap your head around- perhaps because you have never experienced a close relationship with a pet?) and you need to go above and beyond simple apologies if you don't want your son (and yourself) to be seen as the "crazy violent neighbors the rest of us need to watch out for!" Edited September 2, 2011 by flutistmom spelling Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 No more BB gun for at least a good month as punishment. Volunteer a bit with a local shelter as a character builder and apologize to the neighbour and make it up in some way to her. Maybe walking the dogs or mowing her lawn. I wouldn't let a kid who shot at my dog then take it for a walk. I *WOULD* allow him pooper scooper duty for a period of time. Maybe a month?;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WishboneDawn Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 No. He shot at them hoping a sting would make them go away and stop barking. Seriously people. I get that you don't agree with me. I get that this should never been done again. Need a drink. I'm offering Bailey's! ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WishboneDawn Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I wouldn't let a kid who shot at my dog then take it for a walk. I *WOULD* allow him pooper scooper duty for a period of time. Maybe a month?;) That sounds perfect. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mirth Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 BB guns should not be in the hands of anyone that does not use on responsibly. Can I just say how funny it is that your avatar is full auto kitty? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UnsinkableKristen Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 :D For the record, I don't think you or your son are doomed or horrible folk. I just think your past issues with the dogs have drained you of empathy for your neighbour on this one. It happens. I once had a neighbour with a beagle that was never leashed and came over to our house to tip over our compost and bay at our dog when she was on her chain. When it was finally hit and killed by car I had not a bit of remorse. So you've just got to take my word for this and fake it. :D Apologize to the neighbours for not taking it seriously and assure her that your son will be punished. Not that he won't do it again, but that he will be punished. She just needs to feel you take her feelings seriously and will do something about it. That's generally what people are looking for in this situation. :grouphug: Now, see, THIS sounds reasonable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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