cathmom Posted May 27, 2011 Share Posted May 27, 2011 Do you honestly believe this? You really believe that spousal abuse and rape did not exist until this generation? I mean, I don't even know how to respond to that, because it demonstrates a level of willful ignorance of history and reality that is just staggering. Rape has been around since people have been around. And the abuse of women has been, too. If anything, "this generation" is one of the first to take both seriously as problems that affect women, as opposed to seeing them as property crimes against men. He's not saying all men, just the ones he grew up with. My dh would never, ever, ever hit a girl either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halcyon Posted May 27, 2011 Share Posted May 27, 2011 I did not say that. I said the boys I grew up with. None of them have ever been in prison those I still know are still married. No one denies the existence of rape, simply that I grew up with boys who would NEVER hit a girl. Just because they're still married doesn't mean they're perfect. Do you really know what happens inside every single one of their homes, all the time? Not saying you don't know your friends, but sometimes abuse comes from the most unlikely of places. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pqr Posted May 27, 2011 Share Posted May 27, 2011 Just because they're still married doesn't mean they're perfect. Do you really know what happens inside every single one of their homes, all the time? Not saying you don't know your friends, but sometimes abuse comes from the most unlikely of places. Yes it does, but I do know these gentlemen. They would die before they would hit their wvies and if they did hit their wvies they would also die as their wives would shoot them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halcyon Posted May 27, 2011 Share Posted May 27, 2011 And am I the only one who had to endure circumcision debates? No, you're not. I won't get into details, but let's just say the grandfather had more than a word with me about it. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted May 27, 2011 Share Posted May 27, 2011 Just because they're still married doesn't mean they're perfect. Do you really know what happens inside every single one of their homes, all the time? Not saying you don't know your friends, but sometimes abuse comes from the most unlikely of places. Really? Do you just think that every other man is abusing his spouse? I mean seriously, why would you doubt these men you don't even know? That is just sick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted May 27, 2011 Share Posted May 27, 2011 Yes it does, but I do know these gentlemen. They would die before they would hit their wvies and if they did hit their wvies they would also die as their wives would shoot them. Sounds like DH and me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pdalley Posted May 28, 2011 Share Posted May 28, 2011 Yes it does, but I do know these gentlemen. They would die before they would hit their wvies and if they did hit their wvies they would also die as their wives would shoot them. I'm married to one of those. :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripe Posted May 28, 2011 Author Share Posted May 28, 2011 Yes it does, but I do know these gentlemen. They would die before they would hit their wvies and if they did hit their wvies they would also die as their wives would shoot them. Hilarious. I agree, there are definitely good men in the world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathmom Posted May 28, 2011 Share Posted May 28, 2011 Yes it does, but I do know these gentlemen. They would die before they would hit their wvies and if they did hit their wvies they would also die as their wives would shoot them. Love it! :lol: Seriously, I hear the song "Gunpowder and Lead" by Miranda Lambert and even though I obviously don't condone murder, I hope to heck my girls would react like that rather than just taking the abuse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassy Posted May 28, 2011 Share Posted May 28, 2011 (edited) Really? Do you just think that every other man is abusing his spouse? I mean seriously, why would you doubt these men you don't even know? That is just sick. :iagree: Of the people I know, the requirement that boys/men don't hit girls/women or people younger/weaker/smaller than themselves, is actually a part of gender stereotyping. I really couldn't imagine any of the men among my close friends or family hitting a woman, or any of the women putting up with it if it did happen. Although it happens, and has always happened, I don't think it's so common. Cassy Edited May 28, 2011 by Cassy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripe Posted May 28, 2011 Author Share Posted May 28, 2011 :iagree: Of the people I know, the requirement that boys/men don't hit girls/women or people younger/weaker/smaller than themselves, is actually a part of gender stereotyping. And for those who are anti-gender roles, it would beappropriate to teach self defense. Honestly since women are at a higher risk of rape and abuse by partners, I think it is important to teach girls in particular how to defend themselves. You can't assume every random man was raised in glittery overalls. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassy Posted May 28, 2011 Share Posted May 28, 2011 I would venture to say that even those raised in 'glittery overalls' are not guaranteed to treat women with respect. If they were raised in an environment that was in some way abusive, experience deprivation and the resultant anger and frustration, and/or come from a culture that is accepting of violence towards women (which I believe is something entirely different from gender stereotyping), then all the pink nail varnish and flowery sundresses in the world are not going to make much difference. Cassy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KarenNC Posted May 28, 2011 Share Posted May 28, 2011 And for those who are anti-gender roles, it would be appropriate to teach self defense. Honestly since women are at a higher risk of rape and abuse by partners, I think it is important to teach girls in particular how to defend themselves. You can't assume every random man was raised in glittery overalls. Why would you have to be "anti-gender roles" in order to teach self-defense? I have a daughter, who has a very definite idea of her gender and went through all the stereotypical princess, frilly, horse phases, and, at 10, is still very much a "girl." She has studied aikido along with her dad for the last 4 years. One of the senseis at the dojo is a woman. One of the highest ranked black belts among the students is a woman (a very, very petite one at that), and several students are women, none of whom seems to have an issue with being a woman or feminine. Self-defense is good for both genders. Frankly, I teach her (as I would a son) that abuse toward someone younger or weaker (physical or otherwise---emotional abuse can be as bad as physical, from what I'm told) than you is shameful and dishonorable--has nothing to do with gender. Bullying is bullying and wrong, regardless of whether it is male on female, female on male, male on male or female on female. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaxMom Posted May 28, 2011 Share Posted May 28, 2011 We don't subscribe to predetermined gender roles. My husband and I - but for his glaring refusal to learn to lactate - do all the same parenting and household stuff. My boy children play dress-up in frilly things. Or pirates. It's the spirit of dress-up: they are putting on the identity of something they are not. No biggie. Not wearing dresses in public... Well, that falls under the same header of cultural tradition that prevents me from wearing a sari. We don't hit people, regardless of gender. It has nothing to do with being gentlemanly or lady like, just being civil. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripe Posted May 28, 2011 Author Share Posted May 28, 2011 I was saying you don't have to be in favor of traditional gender roles to want your kids esp girls to defend themselves, not that ONLY those who aren't traditional would find that useful. Too convoluted of a thought, to come out right. Anyway the most irritating thing about these people to me is their view of education. That they are ranting about unschooling a 2 and 5 year old, as if even very schooly people have 2 year olds in some regemented academic routine, in general, AND that their son wants to go to school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nmoira Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 A response from Storm's mother, Kathy Witterick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripe Posted May 29, 2011 Author Share Posted May 29, 2011 She acts as if knowing someone's sex is the same as forcibly removing their pants and taking a look! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pqr Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 She acts as if knowing someone's sex is the same as forcibly removing their pants and taking a look! The line that she used in an email to the effect that the idea that "the whole world must know what is between the baby's legs is unhealthy, unsafe, and voyeuristic" should tell us all we need to know. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-13581835 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
collinsmom1 Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 (edited) I am all for allowing your children to become who they are created to be... But, I tend to think that gender is one decision that has been made for you... I understand that there are those that do not fit the standard "roles" or "expectations" of said gender, but over all we gain much of our identity from our gender. As for my journey... I used to say that "My ability to have children defined me as a women. Now that I am a mom, the ability to have children has EMPOWERED me as a women!" This has lead me to understand that men are empowered by their ability to protect and provide! Better to embrace ALL that we are than to deny any of what makes us, us! That is my opinion! Edited May 29, 2011 by collinsmom1 missed words in phrase Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angela in ohio Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 (edited) A response from Storm's mother, Kathy Witterick. So now she's blaming the experiment on her 5 yo. Edited May 29, 2011 by angela in ohio Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassy Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Looking at the photos, who says Storm's a boy? :tongue_smilie: Anyone taking bets? :D Cassy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WishboneDawn Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 My thoughts on this whole thing amount to a big shrug. It seems more then a little silly to hide a child's gender from everyone around them but frankly, they otherwise seem like decent parents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silliness7 Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 I don't think this story has anything to do with their kids having long hair. These parents have much larger issues than that. Seriously the only one making a big deal out of gender in their kids life is them. I highly doubt a 5, 2, and 4 month old would care at all about the topic if their parents were not making such a huge deal over it. I see some serious therapy in these boys future.:confused: :iagree::iagree: Oh my, serious therapy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarlaS Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Looking at the photos, who says Storm's a boy? :tongue_smilie: Anyone taking bets? :D Cassy :iagree: Baby boy for sure! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plucky Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 :iagree: Baby boy for sure! That baby is so cute! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorganClassicalPrep Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Looking at the photos, who says Storm's a boy? :tongue_smilie: Anyone taking bets? :D Cassy :iagree:My local news covered this story a couple days ago, and I was looking at the picture and thought "boy"! :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathmom Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 FYI, I clicked nmoira's link before and up popped some virus thingie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nmoira Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 FYI, I clicked nmoira's link before and up popped some virus thingie.Thanks for the heads up. That's weird... the link is direct to the newspaper's site. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathmom Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Thanks for the heads up. That's weird... the link is direct to the newspaper's site. Obviously others clicked it without a problem. IDK why it happened to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
susankenny Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Really, why? Why in the world does every. single. thing. have to be psychoanalyzed? Seriously. You were born with the genitalia God gave you. You are either male or female (99% of the time). The sexes ARE different and unique (probably for a reason like marriage, procreation, etc.) My girls dressed my son up, painted his nails, etc. But not telling him he's a boy? Sorry. Just too freaking strange. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 FYI, I clicked nmoira's link before and up popped some virus thingie. Me too. :confused: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Koerarmoca Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 IMO these folks are a little strange. I would not be a bit surprised if one of the older children slipped up and told someone what gender "the baby" is. I know I couldn't expect my 5 year old to keep that secret. I don't keep my daughters from playing with boy toys. I in fact encourage them to play with more than dolls and Barbie's. my 5 year old LOVES spider-man and has many spider-man shirts and things that she rocks with a skirt and ponytails. I get irritated with folks who comment that she shouldn't have super hero sheets. She is as girly as they come. But like me after having 4 girls I welcome a little blue in my life. In fact my 2 year old has mostly "boy" pajamas because I am just over flowers and butterflies :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ecclecticmum Posted May 30, 2011 Share Posted May 30, 2011 Most people who seem to do this have boys, as it is more limited on boys wearing pink or dresses, then girls whom are"tomboys" we even have a word for it, but of which you don't here one for boys, except maybe for effiminate (sp?). FWIW everyone knows my boy is a boy, he likes his hair short, like Thomas and Lightning McQueen, but also likes Dora and Barbie, he likes wearing cool shorts & biker jackets, but also wears princess skirts for dressups and we have taken him out a couple of times with a pink shirt of one of his sisters, or flowered jeans, which he has chosen he wants to wear. Non-gendering is weird IMO, boys are boys, girls are girls. If the boy wants to wear pink and the girl wants to wear blue who cares, they are still a boy or a girl, if they want to change that later on in life, so be it. My kids are my kids, if they are happy, I am happy. Ppl who do this may have very unsupportive relatives whom are very insistent on gender-steretyping, and have berated them with previous children whom are "outside the norm" (which IMO everyone is, we are all individuals) so turn to this radical thought to stop outsiders berating what is their childrens decisions. Me, I just turn around and swiftly tell anyone, its what he chose to wear, and its none of their business. I don't my PIL to walk round in a diaper, so why should they or me for that matter (unless it concerns their safety or health) care what they themselves choose to wear. My children are not sheep, and they can express their individual feelings through their clothes however they wish :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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