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WHY does my husband get all weirded out about moving things around?


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such a huge, painful, deal-making process to get my husband to help me move furniture, that I figured ways (large furniture slides across the floor on towels, etc.) to move it myself. THEN my kids got big enough to help me....so, case closed. It is weird, but I'm here more than he is, so a pleasant change for me, means....well, I guess it means he has to look up from the paper before he sits down on the couch that's on the other side of the room, now? I don't know. Honestly. Guy thing, maybe.

 

LBS

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Reminds me of my folks... My dad used to ask my mom why she never moved the furniture in any of the rooms. Growing up he'd go to school and come home to rearranged rooms all the time, including his bedroom. My mom's response: :001_huh:"Then I'd have to clean UNDER the furniture!"

:lol::lol::lol:

 

 

 

My dh doesn't mind when I rearrange furniture, as he can see those, but when I rearrange cabinets???? Usually I aim to do it right when he thinks he knows where things are. Mwwaahhhahahahahaha!

Edited by JoyfulMama
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I'm with your husband. I'm a firm believer in "The Movers are in houses ALL THE TIME. They know where it should go. Whereever the movers put the furniture is probably a good place for it and it can stay there till the movers come back the next time!"

 

It DRIVES ME CRAZY that my husband, who is gone all day, and spends most of his home time on the second floor wants to move stuff. I'm the one home all day, I'm the one using it/looking at it. Stop moving around the stuff! I don't go into his office and rearrange things, he needs to stop coming into my 'office' and rearranging things!

 

Rant over.

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It DRIVES ME CRAZY that my husband, who is gone all day, and spends most of his home time on the second floor wants to move stuff. I'm the one home all day, I'm the one using it/looking at it. Stop moving around the stuff! I don't go into his office and rearrange things, he needs to stop coming into my 'office' and rearranging things!

 

Rant over.

 

LOL

 

It doesn't bother me when DH moves furniture... Unless he does not let me clean under it while it is moved..:glare:

 

But, it really irks me when I organize the kitchen or pantry and he does it about a week after I have. Or when he even LOOKS at my baking shelf :tongue_smilie:

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I don't think so. He is usually pretty laid back, so I don't get the irritation over furniture being moved.....

 

Dawn

 

Do you think he might have anxiety issues? Being anxious doesn't mean you're losing it or anything. :) Are there other things that set him off?
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My hubby is always moving our furniture. Me I don't care as long as it is comfy and looks decent, but oldest DD is the one who freaks out when things get rearranged. I can see how for some having your environment changed while your not looking could be a little distressing.

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I am not much on the rearranging myself. To me, most of the time when you go into a room there is really only one way the furniture will work well. I like to put my furniture in one place and pretty much leave it there until I move or it has to be replaced. My living room, dining room and bedroom furniture is still in the same place I put it when I moved in 3 1/2 years ago. My kids on the other hand not only like to rearrange their furniture, they like to change rooms as well. Sometimes in the middle of the night or when I am not home, so I will go to put something in someone's room only to find it isn't their room any more. My hubby rearranges his office constantly but I think that is because he hasn't found something that will work for him yet.

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Im glad I am not the only one who will work out how to move heavy furniture alone rather than wait for dh. He cant stand it..he will usually express his distress by saying nothing at all, even if the whole room looks completely different when he walks in! I have learned not to ask for comments, because they are usually negative!

I did learn a lesson though. Who knew that dh considered that particular bookshelf full of...Ill be nice and say knick knacks.....completely his corner? I thought it was time for a change and shifted the dusty things into boxes and put some different things there. He was so upset! I did put all the others back for him and let him have the corner. Its like a security or something.

 

However yesterday I rearranged my office around to accomodate my new computer better- it was hard work but worth it to me. Dh paid me a compliment- he said "you are very creative, aren't you?" regarding my office's new look. That was the best thing he has ever said about my desire to change things around.

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Your dh's reaction is really pretty natural. My mother used to work as an interior designer. When she would redo a room with a client (*after* spending hours and hours picking things out, discovering their likes/dislikes, etc.) she would ask them to wait for 2 weeks before calling to say they didn't like it because the eye needs time to adjust.

 

If you've not spent time talking with dh involving him in the decision, and he walks into a new room without any warning, his reaction is natural.

 

Also, as a pp said, there usually is one best way for furniture to be arranged in a room, sometimes two, as per my decorator mother and sister. It's possible that your dh has an eye for that.

 

There are also people who like change for change's sake (perhaps you from your OP), those who only like change when it makes sense to them, and those who prefer stability to change. Sometimes this is dependent on circumstances. For instance, if dh's life at work involves constant coping with stress, he may prefer that home is pretty "stable." If you need more stimulation, you may want to literally "change things up" at home, which is perhaps, your primary circle of influence.

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Sounds like my husband. I usually change things while he's out. Otherwise, we have to discuss and mull it over a while, discuss some more, do some diagrams, measurements, mull it over a will.

 

:)

 

:iagree:

 

It is the same here. I also didnt decorate for two yrs bc we couldnt agree on anything. Finally I decided to take control and do everything... while he is at work :)

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LOL

 

It doesn't bother me when DH moves furniture... Unless he does not let me clean under it while it is moved..:glare:

 

But, it really irks me when I organize the kitchen or pantry and he does it about a week after I have. Or when he even LOOKS at my baking shelf :tongue_smilie:

 

Yes, quite moving things in the kitchen! If you aren't going to do the cooking, then you don't know where items need to be!

 

When we got our first household goods shipment from Japan, my friend and I organized the whole kitchen. I knew what we owned, what we used and how often it was used. We figured it all out. We put post its on the cupboards as we did it.

 

A few weeks later, I was out of town when the final shipment came. He unpacked that and totally rearranged the kitchen. Totally ignoring the post it labels I had up! When I complained he told my set up made no sense.

 

No sense???? He'd say things like:

 

"Why would put the plates down there?"

Me: Because your son is 7, and he unloads the dishwasher.

"Why would you put cups there?"

Me: Because your son is seven and that's where he can reach to get his own drink.

"Why would you bowls there?"

Me: Because your son is seven........ Are you seeing a theme here??

 

It's the common sense factor that to me is missing. Why move things when were they are works much better for the person using it the most??

 

And as for decorating, well he's getting better, but for years my husband would move all the furniture and all the big things would end up on one end of the room. It was TOTALLY off balance. You felt like you were on the sinking end of the Titanic when you walked in the room! LOL!

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