3lilreds in NC Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 We're cleaning the girls' room today and they are clearly overwhelmed with their stuff. When I needed to vacuum recently, I put the stuff from their floor in a laundry basket, because I didn't have time to deal with it just then. Today, when I told them to clean up, they just shoved it behind the ladder to their bunk beds. Sigh. Once they'd gotten most of the rest of the stuff picked up, I had them bring the basket down to the bonus room where we could go through it. It was mostly books and American Girl doll stuff that they could have put away themselves, but I DO understand the overwhelmed feeling one gets when contemplating at a pile that big. Our house is not tiny, but neither is it huge. We do not have much extra storage space. Their closet is full of clothes, a dresser, and their AG horses. They have AG dolls, which are stored in drawers under their bunk beds. They have a bookshelf in their room that is overflowing; I could certainly do some purging there, but it will just make things workable rather than freeing up space. They also have some Playmobil that doesn't have a permanent place to live. I don't know where we could make a permanent place for it to go. That's not on the list to go, though. The baby has far too many toys, too, and we have no good place to store them - I'm getting ready to drastically purge there. The girls are going to fight me on the Barbies and Pollies. I'm just so sick of having all this STUFF. Frankly, the little dolls are just the tip of the iceberg - but if they were gone it would be a start. They do play with them, and they really enjoy them, but I would much prefer AG and Playmobil to be their choices. Can I just tell them that the little dolls are going? Or should I start on my own stuff first, set a good example, and THEN tackle their stuff? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dtb1999 Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 I feel the same way about my ds's legos and little playmobil stuff. I got to the point that I moved most of it from a main area in the house and put it in their room. That way I don't have to see it that often. Last night, ds1 dragged a bunch of legos into the livingroom, and I was so close to throwing them all away...oh, was it tempting..:tongue_smilie: Maybe just give them a few baskets or plastic bins, and have them toss everything into those at the end of the day. I completely gave up on keeping each set of lego or playmobil organised into labeled and individual plastic bins. On occasion I do go through all the little sets and reorganise them, but unfortunately it just doesn't last long. I got to a point where as long as it is off the floor and contained in something, I'm satisified. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jmac Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 We do this every six months or more. We go through the whole house and toss what we don't need, what isn't used regularly, what is taking up to much space. I recently purged the kids room after I read on this board a post where someone said, you can't clean clutter (or was it, you can't organize clutter) So I told the kids that there were so many kids around us that don't have any cool toys and we were going to give them some of our toys. Then when they were away with daddy, I went through their rooms and filled at least a dozen trash bags full of toys. I wish I would have taken before and after pictures. For everything else like my little ponies, tinker toys, blocks and our way to massive mr. potato head collect, I bought those plastic tubs at walmart. My kids haven't noticed any toys missing but I have noticed how much easier it is to clean their rooms. There is still more stuff I want to get rid of when they arn't looking. They also know that if they want new things for Christmas then they need to make room but honestly I don't make a big production of any of it. Just get rid of it when they arn't looking. But deffinitly do the same with your stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 I'd toss it. Tell them which dolls are staying and which are going. I go through stuff regularly and toss it, mine included. I hate clutter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tree House Academy Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 Yep...you do it when they aren't there and then they will never notice the toys are gone (at least that is what happens with my kids!). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jann in TX Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 just because YOU do not like those toys does not mean that they will play with the ones YOU want them to... or that they will be upset/angry if you make them throw out their favorite toys--or worse yet--find their toys have disappeared on purpose/without warning (That seems cruel to me). We have managed to avoid the tiny Polly Pocket type toys because I have specifically asked family NOT to gift us in that way! But toys like that need a permanent home... I would, however, let them know that they MUST keep their toys organized and put away when not in use or they are in danger of being 'removed' for a pre-set period (2-4 weeks). Sometimes after that period of 'rest' my dds have decided that they can do without those toys and we 'gift' them to another family... You also alluded to the fact that your own things are not organized--you really need to set the example... could it be that you are frustrated with them (the mess) because you are frustrated with yourself?... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 jWell--if they PLAY with them I'd be cautious... ust because YOU do not like those toys does not mean that they will play with the ones YOU want them to... or that they will be upset/angry if you make them throw out their favorite toys--or worse yet--find their toys have disappeared on purpose/without warning (That seems cruel to me).... I would, however, let them know that they MUST keep their toys organized and put away when not in use or they are in danger of being 'removed' for a pre-set period (2-4 weeks). Sometimes after that period of 'rest' my dds have decided that they can do without those toys and we 'gift' them to another family... You also alluded to the fact that your own things are not organized--you really need to set the example... could it be that you are frustrated with them (the mess) because you are frustrated with yourself?... :iagree::iagree::iagree: I would never discard toys that my son still enjoys. How would you feel if you went outside one day and your dh had donated your car to charity, because it was taking up too much room in the garage, and it just had to go? Or your favorite clothes? Or your shoes? Or your makeup? Or your favorite books? Those toys mean just as much to the kids, and they may never forget it if you throw their toys away just because you'd prefer them to play with something different. I think you should concentrate on getting your own stuff organized before you take your frustrations out on your kids. (And believe me, I've been there!) Sorry if I sound a little harsh, but it seems mean to throw your kids' toys away because you don't like them. Unless the toys are in some way harmful or offensive, I don't see why the kids can't choose what they want to play with. Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 I do it when the kids aren't looking. 99% of the time they don't notice. In this case, it appears that the OP wants to discard toys that her dc still play with, and enjoy. Unless I completely misread her post, I don't think there is any question that the toys will be missed. I'd be fine with pitching stuff that hasn't been looked at in a long time and has been long outgrown. Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3lilreds in NC Posted May 4, 2009 Author Share Posted May 4, 2009 In this case, it appears that the OP wants to discard toys that her dc still play with, and enjoy. Unless I completely misread her post, I don't think there is any question that the toys will be missed. I'd be fine with pitching stuff that hasn't been looked at in a long time and has been long outgrown. Cat It is true that they do still play with them. However, I have a rule that we can't have Barbies and Pollies out at the same time, for example, and they don't miss the ones that aren't out. I had also thought maybe we could downsize the Barbie collection. We have a large Rubbermaid-type tote full of the stuff, including some horses and a van. If they would agree to fit all they want to keep into a smaller box, that would be ok too. There is no place in their room to put their Playmobil. They have a big tote for the small enough pieces, but the castle and horse barn don't fit into it and have to sit out. I have no closet in the house that will hold them at this point. You are right, though, that I'm frustrated with ALL the mess, not just theirs. I was blessed to have an organizer come as a Christmas gift one year - she helped me turn the spare bedroom/office (read: junk collection room) into our office/school room. It was wonderful. It was also about 3 weeks before I found out I was pregnant with Isaac, which made all our work pointless because it had to become a nursery at that point! :lol: I'd love to have her come back. I will start working on my stuff and see how far I can get on my own. Then we will tackle theirs. I'm going to keep an eye out for things that can just leave without anyone noticing, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 We get rid of toys on a regular basis. My boys have become accustomed to the routine and will help me sort the toys into toss, donate/freecycle, keep. BUT....They are used to it because we de-clutter toys regularly, and they know that I will listen if they tell me that a toy is important to them. I love your idea of purging and cleaning your things first. That shows them that it's a family expectation and not something you're doing to them. It is possible to let them have Polly Pocket and Barbie without being overrun.(And all of the other toys....My bane is stuffed animals. How many stuffed animals does one family need??? And where do they all come from?) They can enjoy playing with them without owning every single Polly Pocket or Barbie doll ever made. In your shoes, I'd sit them down and let them know that your home is being overwhelmed by toys. You know they love PP and Barbie. How about if they choose the very most special favorites, and the rest will be given away to children who do not have many toys. A reasonable amount might be, "The number of PP things that can fit in this box," or "Please choose your two favorites" or.... Making this go over easily is all about presentation. "We are so blessed. We have a lot to share." My boys love the idea of sharing their blessings. I read them the thank you email I got from the family who took all of our Rescue Heroes off our hands (through Freecycle), and they were really touched. Good luck. :) Another Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 I was blessed to have an organizer come as a Christmas gift one year - she helped me turn the spare bedroom/office (read: junk collection room) into our office/school room. It was wonderful. That must have been such a great gift! My dh says we should hire an organizer, and I'm sure he's right, as I tend to get overwhelmed by the clutter and just stand there in the middle of the room, not knowing where to start. It's just so hard for me to throw things away, that I'm almost afraid to hire the organizer, because it will force me to make so many difficult choices. I think one of my biggest problems is that we buy too much stuff, mainly for myself and my ds, and then it's so hard for us to part with it. I feel guilty about wanting to throw toys away, because it's my fault that we're overrun with them. Ditto for all of my art supplies, books -- you name it, and I can pretty much guarantee you that we have too much of it. Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 .My bane is stuffed animals. How many stuffed animals does one family need??? And where do they all come from? I hate to say this, but I'm pretty sure they're mating when we're not looking. Especially those little Beanie Baby things. Those female Beanies must be the tramps of the neighborhood, because I swear they reproduce overnight. Cat (the other one!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Punks in Ontario Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 and rotate them out so that we don't have too many toys to trip over or clean up. If the children can't tidy them up themselves, there are too many toys! They are allowed to rotate them some themselves. If the toys take up more than a box or two in storage, some have to go. I throw away anything that is broken and cull the others whenever they're not looking. Also, if no one asks for a stored toy for some time, it's likely okay to throw it out. Karen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyof4ks Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 Before I purge I remember that these are the kids things, not mine, so I need to be sure to keep the things that they love and get rid of things they don't play with. I get my kids involved, because they do notice EVERY.SINGLE.THING.THAT.IS.MISSING. UGH! Even my 3 yr old has his room memorized lol. We usually go through one type of toy at a time. The books get done first, because those are the hardest. All books that are missing pages or that are no longer age appropriate go first and then we weed out others until the remaining books fit of the shelves. Toys sometimes just need organization. You mentioned a bonus room. Is there anyway to put in a wall of cabinets both top and bottom? Many of those little things like the pollies fit so well in those three drawer plastic containers, and those fit right in cabinets. One rule that I stick to every time we purge is the 50% stuffed animal rule. Basically 50% of the stuffies must go. I hold up two toys, and they have to pick one (if they love them both, then they have to pick two out of the pile to go). I don't know why grandparents love stuffies! Good Luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SquirrellyMama Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 I've done this three ways. 1. They can't keep it picked up and I tell them we are getting rid of stuff and they help. 2. I wait until they go to bed and get rid of stuff. Many times they do not notice. 3. I pay them 10 cents - 25 cents per toy they get rid of and they use that as garage sale money. I know, I know, more stuff coming in the house but we get rid of the old stuff first. I only do this around garage sale season. The only rule is: You CANNOT get rid of your siblings stuff. It has to be your own. Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adams101 Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 I bought my daughter some of those plastic drawer units. The come in different colors and sizes. We labeled each drawer, you could use a picture for younger kids. Even when these are out in a room, it doesn't look too bad if it is well organized. When the drawer for Barbies is full, that's it. That way she gets to keep some of them, but they have to fit in the drawer. When you finish playing with them, they go back in that drawer (that is the intent anyway). I really need to get in there and clean her stuff out, but haven't gotten that far yet. I always do it when they are gone, so they don't even notice a lot of stuff is missing. Either they don't realize it, or they just think I moved it. I usually hang on to the bag of "get rid of" stuff for a little while so if they just can't live without _______, I pull it out and put it back in their room. That rarely happens though. I always use a black trash bag so they can't see what is in there. They know I cleaned their room, but have no idea what I got rid of. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 I don't know if this might help but a friend of mine, when facing an overwhelming mound of specific toys, laid out 3 and had her boys pick out one to give away. She had 2 boys and the toys in question were Rescue Heroes. This worked for her. Each child got to pick one of the three and the one remaining was donated. I've used this on our "junk toy" bin which lives under a bed. It's basically all those happy meal and birthday gift bag toys. I lay out 3 and each gets to pick one. It's a bit tedious but it really cuts down on the amount of stuff and still allows the kids to have an active say in what stays. I've also put toys in bins in the garage and brought them back in after a few months. I do think that setting a good example by going through your things would be a great start too. HTH Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 The only rule is: You CANNOT get rid of your siblings stuff. It has to be your own. :lol::lol::lol::lol: Now where's the fun in that? ;) Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom0012 Posted May 4, 2009 Share Posted May 4, 2009 I didn't read all the posts, but here is something that has worked very well for me. I don't ask the kids about getting rid of toys because they almost always have difficulty parting with them. Instead, I take the toys I think they have outgrown and put them in a box which then goes in the attic. If no one asks about the toys or misses them for 1 year, I get rid of them. Lisa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3lilreds in NC Posted May 5, 2009 Author Share Posted May 5, 2009 Toys sometimes just need organization. You mentioned a bonus room. Is there anyway to put in a wall of cabinets both top and bottom? Many of those little things like the pollies fit so well in those three drawer plastic containers, and those fit right in cabinets. Good Luck! We have a lot going on in our bonus room. There is a little section that breaks off from the main room; our computers, printers and files are there, separate by a little gate to try to keep the little man out (it works, sort of). We have our TV in there on a very small TV stand, as well as a couch and 2 chairs. We have one wall of bookshelves that is full, between books I have for school and dh's books and mine. The closet does have shelves, but they are full. I think there is some purging that could take place in there, but there are several Lego boxes that belong to dh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3lilreds in NC Posted May 5, 2009 Author Share Posted May 5, 2009 I hate to say this, but I'm pretty sure they're mating when we're not looking. Especially those little Beanie Baby things. Those female Beanies must be the tramps of the neighborhood, because I swear they reproduce overnight. Cat (the other one!) Beanie babies *were* a problem until I got rid of a bunch of them - they were all NWT and I donated most of our collection to the Salvation Army drive, I think. Maybe it was the Red Cross, I'm not sure. My chiropractor had a donation spot in her office. I have hordes of stuffed animals in my attic - it's just ridiculous. What do you do with them? Can I take them to Goodwill? Those, I know, could just go and no one would notice. I had to take them all out when we started with Webkinz. Now the Webkinz are threatening to take over our world too. Gah. Giving them each $.25 per toy they part with is a FABULOUS idea! They are always wanting allowance, which dh and I haven't figured out yet, and trying to figure out ways to earn money - and I'm really bad at working that out for them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mama Anna Posted May 5, 2009 Share Posted May 5, 2009 . . . although I usually use it for the "junk" toys. If I find a toy too many times where it's not supposed to be, I simply warn the girls that the next time I see it there (on the floor, in the living room, etc.), it's gone. Of course, there has to be a place where it's supposed to go instead, but this technique gives me the ability to be picky about which toys will get disposed of while still making it dds' responsibility to put them away if she really wants to keep them. I also try to make sure that when I find it "there," it wasn't dragged out by dd 2.5 instead of being left out by dd 5.5, who's really old enough to know better. But that depends on the mercifulness of my mood. :) We also rotate toys, including books, and cull them at least once a year. Reminder: it's getting to be that time again - I need to set aside some time soon . . . My personal bane is the junk plastic toys, etc. that kids bring home from Sunday school, b-day parties, etc. Especially the ones with the sharp corners that always seem to end up underfoot . . . Mama Anna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlebug42 Posted May 5, 2009 Share Posted May 5, 2009 This is actually a constant struggle at our house all of the time. I have tried two strategies. 1. I lay all of one type of toy i.e., Barbies in one spot and choose a number that each child is allowed to keep. Then, the select the ones they love most and the others go in the garage sale. Another strategy is to tell them that they can keep the money that we make in the garage sale for selling their toys/books/videos. This is most effective with my 7 year old as she currently is saving all the money she gets for an American Girl doll that she wants. For her it is easier to part with some little things. My bigger problem is my 5 year old because she has a ton of toys but legitimately plays with them all. I am hoping to deal with the chaos for a little while longer and pray that she outgrows some of it soon. Some things that I know do not get played with, I am just getting rid of. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashkraw Posted May 5, 2009 Share Posted May 5, 2009 I have bagged up items that I believe donot get played with an dthen I move them to a storage area in the garage or attic. If we go several months without noticing then I remove them from the home. This has back fired on me a few times, but for the most part it works. The back fire... being at a birthday party and my girls seeing something opened they used to have.. "they say, we have that" and then they look at me and ask "do we still or did you sell it". oops! Everyone else gets a laugh out of it. I try not to remove things that are being played with because eventually they will be out of the toy stage and we will wish they were still young. good luck, Monica Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liza Q Posted May 5, 2009 Share Posted May 5, 2009 We live in an apartment so we are pretty tight for space. I have always gone through their stuff with them and let them choose what has to go. I will say "We can keep as much Barbie/toy food/whatever stuff as will fit in this container." and then they make the hard decisions themselves. Sometimes (like every couple of months) I will tell them to put their stuff away and warn them that I will throw away anything that is left out. They know I will do it (from past experience - thankfully it was not anything valuable!) so they get with the program and even bring me things to get rid of when it gets too hard to put stuff away. Hmmm...we have not done this since November and today was my sons birthday - more Lego and Galactic Heroes! I think that it is time to do it again!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cajunrose Posted May 5, 2009 Share Posted May 5, 2009 We have that problem in our family too. I'm just as bad as the girls. What I have started doing is sending them away for a few hours. I go through their rooms and put everything I haven't seen them playing with in a while in a bag. I'm very selective..I don't chunk anything I know they love. I then tell them that if they can tell me something that is in that bag, they can have it back. They NEVER have been able to tell me anything. After a week, it all goes to goodwill. Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest janainaz Posted May 5, 2009 Share Posted May 5, 2009 Anything that my boys actually play with I keep. Maybe you just need some more organized storage for them to put them away? My closets are organized, but there are some things that I use those little plastic bins for that have lids. Maybe you could really go through their room, get rid of whatever the DON'T play with and then anything that has little pieces, etc. put in a bin, up on a shelf. Then they have to ask to play with them. I would not get rid of them if they like them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katemary63 Posted May 5, 2009 Share Posted May 5, 2009 . My bane is stuffed animals. How many stuffed animals does one family need??? And where do they all come from?) :iagree::lol: I have often said to my kids that I believe that Earth ( yes, the whole planet) Needs to have a "Purge the Stuffies Day" Every kids gets to keep one. The rest should burn! Then we can all start over. I personally would never throw away a toy my kids liked without them being present - even ones they don't play with that often anymore or seem to be growing out of. I include my kids in the process of reducing quantity, like another poster said. We do it periodically. We decide together what is give away, throw away or "save for grandkids". The thing is, my DD8 ( and in the past, the older ones) know that she has to choose - something has to go. We have to fit it all on the shelves and in the boxes within reason - not over stuffed. If it doesn't fit - you must get rid of it! ( hey - poem!) ( of course I throw away junky, broken or cheapo toys all the time, but not the good stuff or special stuff.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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