Scarlett Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 They are staying with a couple they have never met in person. I am so suspicious of this entire thing…..but have to leave it alone since they are adults. Supposedly the woman’s husband is a big shot in the military and they are staying with them in Zama Kanagawa. They should be landing at about 2:45 p.m Wednesday Japan time. That is about 11:45 p.m tonight my time. 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slache Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 Japan is like the safest place in the entire world. I think literally. It's a good place to be. 10 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted December 21, 2022 Author Share Posted December 21, 2022 22 minutes ago, Slache said: Japan is like the safest place in the entire world. I think literally. It's a good place to be. Thanks. I guess I am just not comfortable going to stay with people they have never met in person. ,they are both super anxious people…..I can’t imagine how they decided to do this. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 Well Zama is US military so that part checks out. 2 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted December 21, 2022 Author Share Posted December 21, 2022 10 minutes ago, Jean in Newcastle said: Well Zama is US military so that part checks out. Thanks. I am praying it is all as presented. They should land in 45 min, 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soror Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 I hope they have a wonderful time and all is well. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slache Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 Are they all settled? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pinball Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 8 hours ago, Scarlett said: They are staying with a couple they have never met in person. I am so suspicious of this entire thing…..but have to leave it alone since they are adults. Supposedly the woman’s husband is a big shot in the military and they are staying with them in Zama Kanagawa. They should be landing at about 2:45 p.m Wednesday Japan time. That is about 11:45 p.m tonight my time. How unusual. Does your son have a history of traveling outside the US or is this the first time? Is he particularly interested in Japan or their history/culture? What does he have in common with this man? How long have they had a relationship? Who is paying for the trip? Are their return tickets purchased or is the return open-ended? What about work? School? Has he graduated from college yet? so many questions! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted December 21, 2022 Author Share Posted December 21, 2022 15 minutes ago, pinball said: How unusual. Does your son have a history of traveling outside the US or is this the first time? Is he particularly interested in Japan or their history/culture? What does he have in common with this man? How long have they had a relationship? Who is paying for the trip? Are their return tickets purchased or is the return open-ended? What about work? School? Has he graduated from college yet? so many questions! They have never left the US. The wife of the couple worked with my DIL but in a different location. They are both working and paid for their trip….I have the itinerary and return tickets are purchased, ds is on winter break from college and he has one class to take next semester and will graduate in the spring. DiL texted me at 3:00 a.m my time. They had gotten there about 11:45 p.m my time. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted December 21, 2022 Author Share Posted December 21, 2022 1 hour ago, Slache said: Are they all settled? I hope. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 (edited) Oh if the 2 wives worked together, I wouldn't be too worried about it. Other than moms just worry of course. Honestly, overseas travel was transformative to me as a young adult and it's such a great opportunity for them. I hope they have a great trip. Good for them! Edited December 21, 2022 by catz 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted December 21, 2022 Author Share Posted December 21, 2022 2 minutes ago, catz said: Oh if the 2 wives worked together, I wouldn't be too worried about it. Other than moms just worry of course. Honestly, overseas travel was transformative to me as a young adult and it's such a great opportunity for them. I hope they have a great trip. Good for them! One coincidence that makes me feel a little better is that my best friend’s son and his wife are in Tokyo right now. They spend months at a time there….so if they get in trouble someway there is someone there that can help. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
livetoread Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 One of my favorite Japan stories. We were there visiting as a family when I was in college and on the way to visit the Hiroshima peace park, my brother left his camera on the bullet train. We went to the police at the station and they told us, "Don't worry, go to the park and we'll have it when you get back." We smiled thinking, yeah right, but sure enough, when we got back, they gave it to us. Here in the US I've had people return my purse/wallet etc, but what was interesting was that the police were sure we'd get it back. I'm always surprised if I do here. It got me thinking about what it would feel like to be part of a society that feels that safe - that you can trust your fellow citizens to respect your property etc. I know their society is hardly perfect but that part of it is enviable. 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pinball Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 I’d be more worried about emotional manipulation by the people they are visiting than anything criminal/dangerous happening to them in Japan by Japanese citizens. What is the age difference between the couples? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 I hope they have a great time! Once you updated with the information that your daughter-in-law and one of the couple they are visiting were coworkers, I relaxed a bit. I had been wondering how this came about. I was picturing online acquaintances from a gaming group or something and getting nervous with you. I get being nervous about travel anyway. My daughter went to Europe with 3 friends last summer. Yes I was very nervous about it all. They had a wonderful time and I only heard about the few scary moments after they came back. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stephanier.1765 Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 I've several times gone to stay with people I've never met IRL. My parents were also very suspicious and worried. I won't say 100% that nothing can go wrong but I don't think it will, especially knowing the wives know each other from real life. {{Scarlett}} I know how hard it can be to sit back and worry but I really do think it'll be ok and your son and DIL will have the times of their lives. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted December 21, 2022 Author Share Posted December 21, 2022 5 hours ago, pinball said: I’d be more worried about emotional manipulation by the people they are visiting than anything criminal/dangerous happening to them in Japan by Japanese citizens. What is the age difference between the couples? Yes I guess I wasn’t clear but that is my concern too. I did just find the wife on Linked in and she did work for same insurance company my DIL works for. Looks like she is 37. I think her husband is 54. My son and wife are 22. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 (edited) 55 minutes ago, Scarlett said: Yes I guess I wasn’t clear but that is my concern too. I did just find the wife on Linked in and she did work for same insurance company my DIL works for. Looks like she is 37. I think her husband is 54. My son and wife are 22. Hmm that may be a bit of an unusual friendship I suppose. What prompted your son and his wife to go? I mean, if they wanted to visit Japan anyway it would make sense to stay with people they know (or one of them knows). Try not to worry in any case. I know it's hard, especially if you don't know anything about the people they are visiting. ETA: now that I am thinking about this, I have had friends from work who were 15+ years older than me. We'd do stuff together. It's true we were local but online friendships are not so unusual. I have a small group of women I have known only online for 15+ years. I've met one of them but not all. Last year they all got together at a meetup from all over the US - I couldn't go due to other travel but I would not have hesitated if it weren't for that conflict. Edited December 21, 2022 by marbel 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lecka Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 My guess is that the hosts have a nice house and enjoy hosting, and are taking advantage of it while they can. It does not strike me as strange at all with the information given. This is really normal behavior for many people who just enjoy hosting and showing off their area. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted December 21, 2022 Share Posted December 21, 2022 6 hours ago, stephanier.1765 said: I've several times gone to stay with people I've never met IRL. My parents were also very suspicious and worried. I won't say 100% that nothing can go wrong but I don't think it will, especially knowing the wives know each other from real life. {{Scarlett}} I know how hard it can be to sit back and worry but I really do think it'll be ok and your son and DIL will have the times of their lives. I have visited friends from online too. All were fine, good people. I haven't stayed anywhere but I do think you can make friends online. And I am so happy about that. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted December 21, 2022 Author Share Posted December 21, 2022 Well I did a FaceTime with my DIL so I have proof of life, lol 7 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chocolate-chip chooky Posted December 22, 2022 Share Posted December 22, 2022 I hope they have a great time. I understand the mama-worry. My eldest is about to fly to NZ with her husband, to see his extended family for Christmas. They are going to a familiar place with familiar people, but I still get nervous. I think it's the fact that I can't just jump in and help if there's any problem that crops up. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lecka Posted December 22, 2022 Share Posted December 22, 2022 (edited) I think also — when someone moves away, she can like to hear about the people she used to work with. Your DIL can tell her all about her former colleagues. Her former colleagues will think it is nice of her to host a young couple. It’s not my thing, but this is how military spouses (or spouses who move often) maintain ties. Things like this go a long way. They might also live in a cool historical home if some kind, that they wouldn’t normally live in. They might know nobody will want to visit when they are stationed at some less touristy place. It really is likely it’s an above-board thing. And I think it’s a good sign there are two people traveling together as a couple. I would think it was okay with someone traveling alone, too, but it’s much more comforting to me to know it’s a couple. Edited December 22, 2022 by Lecka 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lecka Posted December 22, 2022 Share Posted December 22, 2022 Just another thought — the woman is probably well-known to other colleagues, so if she has a good reputation, it is a reputation coming from older people! A lot of spouses can’t have the same kind of job they had in the US, too, and it can make women even more eager to keep up with their civilian job and former colleagues. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted December 22, 2022 Share Posted December 22, 2022 I'm glad you talked to her. The trip sounds amazing! 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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