Do your younger teens *enjoy* their homeschool studies or just tolerate them?

[ereks mom]

The reason I ask is that this morning at church a dear friend of mine asked EK how school was going. EK replied, "It's going okay. I don't like it, but it's going okay." Well, she was honest, and that was okay, but I must admit that it makes me sad that she feels that way. I guess it hurt my feelings to hear her say it so matter-of-factly. I knew she didn't like certain subjects (math & grammar), but I thought she was kind of enjoying some others (literature & Latin). We are doing a semester of geography this year instead of history, and history has been her favorite subject. She'd much rather be talking on the phone or playing on the computer or going to choir or drama, etc. than working on academics. She loves to read, but only books that she chooses, and she doesn't like to do analysis of the literature she reads for school. Anyway, this just got me wondering how your kids feel about school.

[thundersweet]

My 7yo dd says she hates school. It upsets me to hear this. Like your dd, she would rather be doing something else fun. That's what it boils down to for us. My dd likes pretty much everything we do while we are doing it but she complains before and after. I keep telling her she is welcome to go to school instead. :001_smile:

 

Sandy

[Michelle T]

He is very definite that being homeschooled is better than going to PS, but he also will honestly say that he simply tolerates school, but really doesn't like it. He is never defiant or disrespectful, he does what he must, but there is no enthusiasm whatsoever. He just goes through the motions of required school work, doing absolutely nothing beyond the minimum required.

 

It is very discouraging, and I often feel like I'm just wasting my time. But I know he is much better off in homeschool, even though he can't appreciate that.

Michelle T

[Melissa in Australia]

He is very definite that being homeschooled is better than going to PS, but he also will honestly say that he simply tolerates school, but really doesn't like it. He is never defiant or disrespectful, he does what he must, but there is no enthusiasm whatsoever. He just goes through the motions of required school work, doing absolutely nothing beyond the minimum required.

Michelle T

 

This is exactly what most of mine do.

when the older ones were at school, they just sat in the class and did nothing. the teacher gave everyone the choice to do work or not, they chose not. now I push them through their schoolwork.

 

the only one who enjoys doing his work is ds 11. he loves it.

[8filltheheart]

Depends on the child and their personality. My oldest fought with me about school throughout his high school yrs (though he is thankful now....there is hope for all of us!!) My 16 yos just does enough to get by which is a shame b/c he is my most intelligent child, but he doesn't try and whatever happens from just showing up and doing the work is what he gives.

 

My 9th grader loves school and spends free time reading even more. (though she really doesn't like geometry)

 

My 7th grader loves math and science. Enjoys LL from LOTRs. Hates French. Hates spelling. And depending on the writing assignment, either tolerates it or enjoys it. If you asked him if he liked school, I think he would say that it depends on the subject.

 

My 4th grader just loves everything. It is her nature.

[ereks mom]

He is very definite that being homeschooled is better than going to PS, but he also will honestly say that he simply tolerates school, but really doesn't like it. He is never defiant or disrespectful, he does what he must, but there is no enthusiasm whatsoever. He just goes through the motions of required school work, doing absolutely nothing beyond the minimum required.

 

 

I asked her if she thought she'd prefer public school, and she was quick to answer "no!". She is very social and outgoing, and now that ER is away at college, I thought that she'd feel isolated and might ask to go to PS, but I guess not.

[Laura in VA]

I'd say my dd (12) simply tolerates it. I'm having more of an issue this year than I've ever had with her attitude toward schoolwork and just about everything in general. So here's a :grouphug:. I inwardly cringe when anyone at church asks her how school's going.

[mom2abcd]

Dd almost 13 sounds about like your dd. She would tell you that she loves being homeschooled, but she likes is the freedoms, the extra time, the flexibility, etc.

 

I think our kids get spoiled and don't appreciate what they have. Part of it is their age, too. I would love to hear ideas of what might help them really appreciate the effort we are going through and help them go about their day cheerfully.

 

It's a heart issue, I guess.

 

The idea that is tossed around here every so often of replicating a public school day might help.

 

Any other ideas?

[Cindyg]

My son says he hates all school, but since you have to go to school, HOMEschool is a pleasant way to do it. So put him down for a "tolerates it."

[Rhonda in TX]

At least some of your kids prefer homeschooling to any other option. My DD has asked repeatedly to go to school. That's not an option at this point.

 

What I think is funny is that she loves to draw and write stories. She gets her schoolwork done quickly so that she has time for that. If she was in brick and mortar school, she would have much less time for these things. I really wish I could get her to focus on the positives rather than the negatives.

 

I don't know about DS. He complains about schoolwork, but that's because it gets in the way of what HE wants to do. Unlike his sister, he has never asked to go back to school. I think he's fine with being home, he just doesn't want to do school at all.

[Hillary in KS]

I had to talk to ds 13 very early in grade school about how to answer the question from strangers.

 

Usually it was just a polite, "How is school going?" kind of question. But sometimes when people find out we homeschool, they ask ds, "Oh? how do you like it?" He'd always respond that he didn't. Which led to all sort of great reactions from strangers.

 

I explained to him that sometimes people want to know what he thinks of doing school at home, not the schoolwork itself. Once he realized that, he began to differentiate. He DEFINITELY prefers homeschool, and feels that he's learning a lot more at home. He began to articulate that to others.

 

However, while there are subjects he likes (piano, history, Latin, economics), he would much rather be playing with legos. Or reading. Or pretty much anything else.

 

I'd love to hear him say that he loves school, but then I think back to when I was young and remember I didn't like all the schoolwork either. I had classes I liked, and the rest I tolerated. Dh doesn't remember many boys loving school when he was in jr. high either.

 

In fact, I didn't really like school as a whole until I was in college. In college there was no "busy work" and I could study the courses that *I* chose. I could indulge *my* interests, and take a couple of mandatory classes on the side.

 

I'm not worried about ds, and I think as long as he's got a subject or two he loves and he's willing to put up with the rest, I'm happy. Sooner or later things will click, and he'll see how everything fits together. He'll see how all the things we've been learning over the past 8 years were building blocks to all the learning he'll do for the rest of his life, and then he'll REALLY take off!

[Lori D.]

Two boys who just tolerate here. Alas for me -- I score off the charts in the area of "love to learn" -- and love to learn just about *anything*!

 

Both say they greatly prefer homeschooling to a traditional classroom -- they'd just rather not have to do ANY type of schooling. At least they are finally of an age where there is no more complaining; they just buckle down and do it. On the other hand, I DO wish they would recognize how much over the years I've bent over backwards to find engaging and interesting materials, and how many great book memories we've made. :glare: (lol)

 

I think when they are asked about school in general, they answer they'd rather do something else. But if asked did they like something in particular (Logic materials; field trip to the glassblowing art academy; Literary Lessons from the Lord of the Rings study; etc.) then they actually perk up... So maybe that's the tack to take: be specific in what you ask about re: homeschooling! : )

 

Warmly, Lori D.

[SBP]

He is very definite that being homeschooled is better than going to PS, but he also will honestly say that he simply tolerates school, but really doesn't like it. He is never defiant or disrespectful, he does what he must, but there is no enthusiasm whatsoever. He just goes through the motions of required school work, doing absolutely nothing beyond the minimum required.

 

It is very discouraging, and I often feel like I'm just wasting my time. But I know he is much better off in homeschool, even though he can't appreciate that.

Michelle T

 

This describes my almost-11yo to a T. (He's never been to PS but still would much rather be homeschooled). I tell myself I should be glad he's not defiant, but sometimes that lack of enthusiasm is SO tiresome.

 

*sigh*

 

SBP

[HappyatHome]

Every single one of my four children told at least one person that they hated school (homeschool) when asked. They equated school with all the things that they didn't like to do or that were hard for them. I taught them to answer instead with something like, "Math is my favorite subject." rather than with something negative.

 

Now two have graduated and are in college. Both have individually thanked us for their childhood and for homeschooling them. All four dc plan to homeschool their own children.

 

When dc reached the age of your ds, their schoolwork became much more demanding. One thing that seemed to help was helping them find something that they enjoyed that they could pour their interest into. With my boys, it was music and Science Olympiad. With dd it is TeenPact.

 

Through these activities, they could see ways that their education was paying off. For example, studying science and math helped them win awards in Science Olympiad. That made a big difference in their attitude.

[Paisley Hedgehog]

nm

[keptwoman]

You know this is a very cheering thread. Since my 9yo is relatively cheery about his work and quite enthusiastic a good bit of the time, it's been a real shock to have my 14yo home this year and resigned about his work at best.

I had this rose-tinted view of how it would be. J would come home and love learning and would enthusiastically get stuck in and be excited about the things he was learning.

 

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: Yeah right :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

 

Oh well. At least I'm clearly not at all alone!

[laughing lioness]

My 14 yo enjoys some of the schoolwork- loves co-op and is looking forward to the One Act Play and TeenPact. He is pretty self-directed and would much rather do his own thing that school work.

It does seem that as the kids get older they develop thier own sense of how to spend their time and priorities. I keep reminding them that it's called "home-work" becasue work is involved. I don't like some of the work I have to do, yet it gets done.

[NicksMama-Zack's Mama Too]

I tell my dh that I've been pushing boulders uphill all day. That's what it feels like. My younger one loves science and is compliant for most other subjects, but this older child is driving me to drink. He doesn't want to go to ps and I think middle school would not be a good fit for him. So here we are.

 

What doesn't kill me makes me stronger, right?

[Sweetpeach]

I think this thread would make a lovely poll.

[Nestof3]

Quite honestly, I know mine would say the same thing. Aaron just wanted to get it done to get to the next stage in life. Also, when people are asked this question, they compare school to all of the other things they could be doing. Then, it's really no competition. If someone asked me how the dinner-making was going, I would say, "fine" -- but I can honestly think of lots of things I'd rather do.

 

I enjoy homeschooling my boys, but quite honestly, I enjoy making cards more -- in the pure entertainment, relaxation sense of it. In the philosophical, meaningful sense, obviously I'd choose the former.

[laughing lioness]

I agree- this would make a great poll!

[Beth in Central TX]

My oldest likes the fact that we homeschool and enjoys most of the work we do with the exception of writing. Since he likes school & the work involved, the other 2 usually follow his lead. His attitude has made homeschooling enjoyable because at least once a month he thanks me for homeschooling him. Everyday isn't that rosy here, but the overall attitude is positive which helps my long-term vision to graduate all 3 boys. My oldest son will be 13 next June, so I'll wait and see if his attitude changes then.

[sadiegirl]

My boys always moan and groan when it comes to school. They tell me that they would rather homeschool but like most of the kids...when asked about school, they don't just give the kind of answers I would love to give. I guess as their teacher, I would like them to go on and on about how "great" their history teacher is or how fun a particular project is but no such luck!! School is school and they would rather be fishing and outside with the dogs! Me, too but oh well...I just remind them that it is a part of life and if we all make the best of it--it makes it less painful for us all.

[Bee]

It depends on what materials we are using.She likes the Key to Math books we used last year,doesn't like the textbook we are using this year.She loves to read books and loves grammmar but doesn't like the grammar text we are using this year or the books we read for history.She likes our literature selections ( most chosen from TWTM list) and listening to the Teaching Company lectures we are using to supplement our history reading.She dislikes vocabulary no matter what we use.She likes our science program this year.She often wishes that I would simply allow her to read in peace all day without interuptions to start school.

I go back and forth,torn between the type of education I want for my children and feeling that I should insist that they start taking some initiative when it comes to their own educations.I keep asking dd what she wants to learn and how and she just looks at me blankly. It frustrates me that oldest dd in particular often does just the minimum to get through her work.

[mrscopterdoc]

She'd much rather be talking on the phone or playing on the computer or going to choir or drama, etc. than working on academics. She loves to read, but only books that she chooses, and she doesn't like to do analysis of the literature she reads for school.

 

Dd almost 13 sounds about like your dd. She would tell you that she loves being homeschooled, but she likes is the freedoms, the extra time, the flexibility, etc.

 

 

DD almost 14 sounds the same. She will do her work and actually does like being home schooled...but being home and having free time, she would rather listen to music, surf online, etc anything other than school and honestly so would I! :lol:

[Katrina]

Two years ago my husband was in Iraq for 2 months and as soon as he got back we were to put our house on the market and move. Needless to say I was very overwhelmed and didn't do much homeschooling during this time. Once we moved things settled down and homeschooling continued again.

 

A year later my dd (12 at the time) and I were having a mother daughter dinner out, and we started talking about homeschool. We had just gone though a very bad year with attitude problems, most likely from hormones but still made our year rather tough. Anyway...she mentioned that she had felt bad when we weren't doing any school when we were in the process of selling the house and moving. I asked her if she still felt that she wasn't learning and she said no, things were fine now. I asked her why she always seemed to compain whenever it was time to work, and she said she didn't like doing it at the time, but afterwards she's glad she learned it.

 

Now that I'm typing this, I've realized that I KNOW they will appreciate what I'm teaching them later if not now so their complaining doesn't bug me at all. (I have an open door policy here...if they don't like it they can open the door and go to the ps down the street :D.) But I've noticed a lot less complaining as well, although my dd still likes to inform me that none of her friends have to learn to diagramm sentences.

 

So, to make a long story short, my kids love homeschool when it comes to subjects like history or science, but tolerate english, math, and latin.

[Sunshine State Sue]

I swear I posted a reply yesterday. :glare:

 

My ds (13 in December) tolerates schoolwork. He has no desire to go to school (he's never been), mostly because he knows how much free time he has compared to his friends in school. But, he rarely does more than the minimum required. He does well with his schoolwork, partially because I have chosen curriculum that suits him well and partially because my standards are high. He could get away with so much at school because the standards are low and the oversight is poor.

 

Left to his own devices, ds would do nothing but team sports and video games. If I could figure out a way to have school be nothing but team sports, he'd love every day. I'd love to toss the video games out the window, but dh won't let me.

 

I take comfort in knowing that ds is doing well academically, has plenty of free time, and does take pride in some of what he accomplishes, generally in the grammar or math areas.

 

Great question. I suspected I wasn't alone, but it's nice to hear it from others.

[Rhondabee]

Dittos, Dittos, Dittos!!!!!

 

Unless he's been talking to one particular "friend", ds appreciates the fact that we homeschool.

 

But, he is adamant about saying that homeschool or public school, either way, he *doesn't* *like* school! He'll do it, and he usually does it fairly cheerfully, but he insists he doesn't enjoy it.

 

Rhonda

[MerryAtHope]

I find kids tend to generalize--my son used to say he hated school, but on further questioning, it was only one subject he hated, the rest he enjoyed. Now he knows better than to make a generalization, so he'll say likes & dislikes :).

 

I set myself free from the need to make school enjoyable. Just released that burden--it's their choice to try to make something enjoyable or not, this isn't about me. I do try, not saying I don't, and I ask for their input as to what things they would like to do, and we're able to make some of those choices--but I don't take it personally if they say they don't like it. They'd say that if they went to school too. Oh well.

 

Merry :-)

[ereks mom]

 

I set myself free from the need to make school enjoyable. Just released that burden--it's their choice to try to make something enjoyable or not, this isn't about me.

...I don't take it personally if they say they don't like it. They'd say that if they went to school too. Oh well.

 

 

 

I think I need to remind myself of this occasionally. :)

[lwilliams1922]

we're having 'issues' this evening.

 

dd12 wants to use the computer.

My usual answer is 'has all your work for today been completed?'

 

As usual, she answers yes very quickly, even though when ever I actually check, I find things missing or not complete. This evening i decided to quiz on her memory verses from the last 3 weeks.

 

She pouted, gave excuses, whined, cried, sulked and everything else she could think of. Her biggest argument was that it was my fault for not giving her a quiz in a while.

 

You see, since I didnt quiz her, it was my fault that she over looked them on her weekly assignment sheets.

 

So tonight DD/12 does not like hsing or the teacher.

 

When she was in school she could sit and socialize a large part of the day. She was not one to remember to do work on her own but she was bright enough to come out 'ok' without doing much work.

 

The new teacher/mom holds her accountable. It's something she's still not used to. So while I think she still likes to take the easy road I think she is progressing.

 

A few months ago I posted a survey on here (at her request) to see if other kids could possibly 'like' hsing.

At the time, she was still in an uproar about missing her friends. She was also very upset about having to do outlines and summaries.

 

I do think today, that after 6 months of hs'ing she is becoming aware of the advantages of hsing. I wont say she 'likes' doing work but she wouldn't 'like' doing work if she were back in school either.

 

She's now finally learned to do outlines and doesn't mind them. Summaries are no longer a bad word. She enjoys reading so much and does them cheerfully looking froward to getting to read more.

[ereks mom]

...your responses tell me that I am right there with the overwhelming majority! I think most kids see it as their job to dislike school! ;)

[ThelmaLou]

Toleration here, at best. They do all enjoy reading, but math, grammar, writing? Forget it. Science can be fun, and history is usually a breather for them because I don't really require any work, just attention. But the hard core academic subjects seem to be the bain of my children's existence. Wish it were different.

[newbie]

DD only loves it when there is a great journalism or politics project, otherwise they both tolerate w/lots of grumbling.

[mamato4]

I was starting to think it was all my fault. I've been so discouraged with ds' lack of desire to learn or to improve. It's an uphill battle but Merry's right. Making school enjoyable is not a task I should put on top of my priority list. I do pray constantly for an attitude change for him and longsuffering for me. It's a struggle for me to stay the calm mom and not start lecturing.

 

I'm hoping his 3 younger sisters do not pick up his negative attitude.

 

But.......he is happy to be homeschooled so for that I'm glad.

 

God Bless,

Anna

[ereks mom]

Toleration here, at best. They do all enjoy reading, but math, grammar, writing? Forget it. Science can be fun, and history is usually a breather for them because I don't really require any work, just attention. But the hard core academic subjects seem to be the bain of my children's existence. Wish it were different.

 

She enjoys reading but not writing assignments based on the literature. Science seems to capture her interest at times, but not deeply and not for long. She hates grammar and geography. She seems to enjoy Latin at times, but doesn't claim to like it. She likes history as long as we are doing historical fiction read-alouds.

[mamato4girls]

We had this same conversation today. My other dd's art teacher asked my 13 yr DD how she liked being HSed, and she said "not really". I think it is a mix of things. Honestly they would probably complain if they were homeschooled, public or private school. This is a rough age. I also think the "grass is greener" scenario is in play too, if they hear of their friends school days.

Most kids, even the really smart bookworms, would rather be doing something other than schoolwork. I feel bad to when my dd says stuff like that. But I also know that she is 13 she does not have the maturity to decide for herself where or how she is schooled.

[ChemMommy]

DD almost 14 sounds the same. She will do her work and actually does like being home schooled...but being home and having free time, she would rather listen to music, surf online, etc anything other than school and honestly so would I! :lol:

 

 

Honestly, he would spend the day playing video games. He does not live for the love of learning! He does everything I ask him to do, reasonably cheerfully, but only enjoys soccer and video games.

 

To be honest, though, he doesn't seem that different from his peers. The other 14yo boys have little interest in academic content.

 

At least mine admits that he likes homeschooling in public. I think that most of the other kids at church would say they dislike school.

 

Of course, he does call me, hopefully affectionately, the "Homeschooling Nazi"!!!!

 

:lol: