Janeway Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 (edited) I could not decide if I should post about this. It is more of a vent. But, a few days ago, I saw a new family doctor. My usual one is okay and all, but I was sort of hoping to find one that is a little more natural. The one we had before this was much more natural. Now with this doctor in this town, every time we go, another prescription and blood test. Well, you know how, in "etiquette for visiting doctors" or "things not to do when seeing a doctor" you are not supposed to see the doctor, and then, as the doctor leaves, throw another thing at him/her? Like, you don't come in for a sprained ankle and when he is all done and leaving, saying "oh, by the way, can you look at this rash too?" Well, I went in for a rash in the breastfeeding area (TMI). The doctor was pretty cold, never smiled. She asked questions and took a look and then prescribed Nystatin. Fine. Then, she closed her computer and got up to leave and as she reached to open the door and walk out, she says "ok, so put on the cream and lose weight." Ummm...lose weight??? None of that was a part of the visit. She did not think my weight was causing the issue I came to her for. She did not bring up the weight until she was opening the door. I did list in my records that I see an endocrinologist every 3-4 months and am being treated for Hashimotos and hypothyroid. I started to tell her this and she comes back with "you just need to not eat food that is bad for you." I started to say I do exercise. I did not even get the chance to mention that I gained weight while taking fertility treatments. Then, she told me I should just have bariatric surgery. Umm, my BMI is not high enough. (even if it were, I tried her as a doctor in hopes of a natural treatment). Another thing, one qualifier of bariatric surgery is not having a medical reason for the weight gain, such as Hashimotos. She just comes back with, there are ways around that. Can I say WTF yet? Trying to get off topic I said something about bringing the kids, but commented that one is scared of needles. She said she would send anyone who is scared of needles to a psychiatrist. I said he was just a child, and she said "yes, and I would send him to a psychiatrist if he is afraid of needles." Needless to say, I won't be going back. Or taking my children. Oh, and to reiterate..she only mentioned the weight loss as she was walking out the door. If she wanted to discuss it, she should have brought it up during the visit, not as she was walking out. Edited September 17, 2016 by Janeway 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 Ugh. That's horrible! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimberly in IN Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 Wow ... At least you discovered what she is like before you brought the kids, transferred records, etc. Just, wow ... 12 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snickerplum Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 Uh, I wouldn't go back either. "So, thanks for the nystatin and lose the attitude." 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 UGH UGH UGH. I like my doctor a lot because he is direct. But this one is just downright rude. I went to a dematologist like that and never ever went back. Rude rude rude. And I would call the one you saw more than rude--nutz. Send someone to a psych for THAT. Sounds like House is her mentor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 (edited) Some doctors are real jerks. My sibling (now deceased) saw one many years ago who was quite patronizing, even though she knew more about her condition than many doctors, and actually located a treatment overseas herself (not easy in pre-internet days). At any rate, at one point Dr. Jerk said to her, "Jenny (name changed), why don't you just act your age?" She said, without missing a beat, "Dr. X, why don't you just lose some weight?" I don't know why it was so funny to us then, but this was back in the day of the God complex, where you never questioned doctors, particularly if you were a woman, where you generally got a pat on the head and a prescription for Valium for any ailment. I miss her. Ok, enough with memory lane. I wouldn't go back there. If it is true that you should lose some weight, you probably already know this. Nothing wrong with direct talk, but this one took it a step farther into just dehumanizing you, from what you say. She said she would send a kid who was afraid of needles to a psychiatrist?? Are you kidding me? That's probably 70% of all kids - and at least 50% of all adults!The woman is a nut job. Edited September 17, 2016 by TranquilMind 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alisoncooks Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 How awful. Is she by any chance "junior" in that practice? I'd definitely report the conversation to higher ups. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Butter Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 Wow. That is horrible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jewellsmommy Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 :grouphug: That sucks and I can commiserate. I had an obgyn that I really liked. He was great in so many ways and is the one who helped me to get pregnant with dd. After dd was born, I had some struggles with weight gain from a med. and some anxiety issues. He made comparative comments about my weightloss and another woman's (that I knew personally). She had lost more weight than me. I lost some weight while pregnant, then gained, and then started losing again. His comment stayed with me for a long time. I put off seeing him again for about 6 years. I saw his partner, a nurse midwife, for everything. Then I had to see him for an issue and he asked when dh and I wanted to try again for another baby. He said I wasn't getting any younger or skinnier. <_< When problems arose back in the spring, I kept putting off going in. I kept telling myself "after a few more pounds." Then I realized how dangerous this could be and just how stupid it was. So, I found a new doctor. I get that weight control is important, but some doctors can be jerks, and you will never bully someone into effective weight-loss. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
creekland Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 but this was back in the day of the God complex, where you never questioned doctors, particularly if you were a woman, where you generally got a pat on the head and a prescription for Valium for any ailment. Wait a minute... times have changed? When? It hasn't seemed any different to me recently. 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldberry Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 That's awful. Sorry! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthwestMom Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 She is nuts. Run away! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsquirrel Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 there is nothing about that that is normal. Not even normal overworked young doctor covers this one. She is weird and you should never go back there. And REALLY don't take your kids. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 The prejudice of doctors toward people who are overweight is well-documented in the research. It really stinks that you experienced it. Her incompetence in treating it (recommending bariatric surgery when it isn't appropriate) should be a concern as well as her "attitude." I would report her to the practice and to the medical board for the sake of other people. If it was reported every time a patient was treated disrespectfully because of weight , it would begin to impact physician practice. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arctic Bunny Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 Wow. Just wow! It's nice that you don't have to go back to see if you really like her... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azalea Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 I think the whole hive would like to be able to give you a great big hug. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 Yeah, that's horrible! I wouldn't go back there, and I wouldn't take my children to see her. My doctor doesn't mince words when she thinks something needs to be addressed, but she's kind about it, and usually it's something that's on my radar anyway. She and I concurred completely on results of recent bloodwork and the approach we should take, and when my midwife and I discussed my prenatal needs and asked my doctor for help with prescriptions (so my insurance will cover them), she readily agreed. That's how doctors should be, IMO. I'm sorry you had such a lousy experience, and I hope you find something better! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 Sheesh. I'd leave AND send a letter to the entire practice explaining that you can't tolerate such bad bedside manner. She needs to answer to her patients and her business partners. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 WOW. I might even take the time to write a letter to the managing clinic. So horrible! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janeway Posted September 18, 2016 Author Share Posted September 18, 2016 there is nothing about that that is normal. Not even normal overworked young doctor covers this one. She is weird and you should never go back there. And REALLY don't take your kids. She is older actually. She is not very tall and is very skinny and has gray hair. I suspect she is maybe 50. I don't know for sure, but she has gray hair and her child is in college. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 Sheesh. I'd leave AND send a letter to the entire practice explaining that you can't tolerate such bad bedside manner. She needs to answer to her patients and her business partners. I would be tempted to do this but I would not. They will spread the word that the OP is a "difficult" patient. It will be harder to get anyone, and they will be tainted against her. Sad, but true in many places. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mellifera33 Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 I'm sorry this happened to you. Some doctors offer "lose some weight" as the cure for everything. Back hurts? Lose some weight! Heartburn? Lose some weight! Multiple broken bones after a car accident? Lose some weight! It starts to get ridiculous after a while. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 In my head I would have thought "f**k off and get a personality you robot". 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 And I severely dislike this new shi* of taking all notes on a laptop. Not all of my docs do this, but more and more of them are. Some are very good at remaining human-like while doing it and some don't even look up once from staring at the thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SemiSweet Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 Sheesh. I'd leave AND send a letter to the entire practice explaining that you can't tolerate such bad bedside manner. She needs to answer to her patients and her business partners. This is exactly what I would do too. :grouphug: I would be ticked. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SemiSweet Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 And I severely dislike this new shi* of taking all notes on a laptop. Not all of my docs do this, but more and more of them are. Some are very good at remaining human-like while doing it and some don't even look up once from staring at the thing. OT but having worked in a couple doctors offices, this is one of those things that's irritating but ultimately can be lifesaving. An inability to read notes can result in all sorts of problems, which is why paper scripts are almost non-existent now. Hopefully doctors will start to get better at it as they get used to it. I've had some that barely look at me but others who manage it well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThisIsTheDay Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 My doctor suggested I lose weight just as a general comment in my annual physical. I'm 5'8", weigh 165, and wear a size 12. I replied that I thought that was quite ridiculous, that I didn't think I needed to lose weight for any medical reason whatsoever. What I really wanted to do was smack her. After she made an unnecessarily, uninformed comment about a family member at another appointment, I found another doctor. Interestingly, she's consistently been rated one of the top 3 doctors in our area for years in the newspaper's annual ratings. I honestly don't know why though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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