ProudGrandma Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 My 13 year old son is probably very low on the autism spectrum...but we see behaviors that we believe are because of that. recently I updated my kitchen and at the same time, I updated my kitchen dishes. The bowls in both sets are very different in size....old had what I would say was a medium sized bowl and my new set has one that is larger and one that is smaller . My son (age 13) was used to filling his bowl with breakfast cereal. Which seemed to be a reasonable amount, but now with the new bowls he chooses the big bowl (because the small bowl is very small...we use it for snacks and desserts)...and he still fills it to the brim. He eats it because it's there...but it's a lot of food. Granted he is a growing boy, but we see this behavior other times, other places, with other situations. My question to you is simply this: is it better to provide the proper size container (a bowl in this case) or to teach him proper portion sizes regardless of the bowl?? We have an aquaintance who is also on the spectrum (adult) and when he goes out to eat, he completely gorges out. He has no sense of portion control at all. We don't want our son to be like that. I don't know what he (our aquaintance) is like at home, just out in public. For what it is worth...this issue with food is not a weight issue at all...my son is NOT overweight by any means...he is actually small for his age. thank you for any ideas and insights. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Honestly, if he isnt overweight, I wouldn't worry about it. Either getting cereal bowls or using the ones you have would be fine. The teen years are rough on those with ASD and I can honestly say that this isn't a big issue in comparison to many he will potentially face over the next 5-8 years. Just speaking with a voice of experience, here. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Honestly, I'm surprised that a 13yo boy is satisfied with only one bowl of cereal -- even if it's a large bowl. Teen boys are HUNGRY!!! :) 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom22ns Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Honestly, if he isnt overweight, I wouldn't worry about it. Either getting cereal bowls or using the ones you have would be fine. The teen years are rough on those with ASD and I can honestly say that this isn't a big issue in comparison to many he will potentially face over the next 5-8 years. Just speaking with a voice of experience, here. I agree. If it isn't causing a weight issue, then it really isn't an inappropriate amount of food for him. If you feel it is too much, you could put out a measuring device (cup or bowl), but there are so many bigger issues in life than one oversized bowl of cereal a day for a child who doesn't have weight problems. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 I'd supply better portion size bowls and also talk about the difference. Have him measure his portions with a measuring cup to compare. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 When my dd was younger and overweight, the pedi said not to withhold food but to give better choices. She said she would grow into her weight, and that's what she did. I just changed the way I shopped and stocked the kitchen. I know your son doesn't have a weight issue, but I'm just saying the pedi felt it was more important to offer a variety of foods than to create what seemed like a diet environment. I'd suggest buying special bowls just for cereal if you want him eating less. For my ASD son, I encouraged him to replace one bowl of cereal a day with a banana. He fills his bowl too and I hate when our regular bowls are dirty because he'll fill the bigger bowl without even thinking about what he's doing. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jan in SC Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Does your son not believe you that he is eating more cereal? Is this the behavior you see? Are you certain that he hasn't needed more food all along and now the bowl is just big enough for him. If you see autistic tendencies, I would encourage you to follow up with a specialist because there are so many issues that are simililar to high functioning autism. In the long run, it will be more helpful to know what you need to help and why, otherwise it is easy to overanalyze lots of behaviors, which will create much stress and resentment. I also think you should be careful projecting another individual's supposed issue on your child. I know you want the best for your child, and I hope you can find some qualified help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiewindmomma Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 If he is able to understand portion size, I do think it is worth teaching. At some point, the teenage growth spurt will wear off, and those portion sizes will be "normal" to him. It has been an issue with older ASD people I know (20s moving into 30s)---most have had huge weight gain. :( 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Lots of NT people have trouble with portion control with different dishes. I'd get him a special cereal bowl. (I'm assuming he was not hungry after breakfast with the previous bowl.) P.S. My Ds17 Aspie is doing especially well now that he's gone gluten free. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 I would make sure he understands the new bowl holds more than the old - but I do not believe in the concept of "portion control" and would not teach that to a child. I would, instead, work on proper eating habits, i.e. eating at meal times only, not eating because one is bored or frustrated, healthy food choices, stopping when no longer hungry. "Portion control" does not apply to teenage males. My DS consumes, and burns, 4,000 calories per day. What seems a reasonable "portion" for a middle aged mom is a drop in the bucket for a teen boy. It is a concept invented for people whose natural appetite regulation does not work. Unless this is an issue with your boy, I would not even mention that some people think certain portion sizes are "correct". 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiewindmomma Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Right, my ds eats 4000cal a day too---but OP's may not have the body awareness to be able to apply the concept of eating until full. I also think just carb-ing out is unhealthy and can lead to glucose swings; better to teach him to eat a bowl of cereal...and then eat half a dozen eggs mixed in an omelette or something. Odds are if he is kissing the spectrum that he is avoiding fruits and veggies and other healthy eating practices. Teaching portion control opens the discussion on how to make healthy choices in eating. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted May 6, 2015 Author Share Posted May 6, 2015 my husband thinks that the psychology behind bigger plates and bowls is the problem. Companies are making bigger plates and bowls to get people to eat more because we naturally eat what we put on our plates...and we naturally think we need to fill them up...thus we eat more than needed. None of our family is over weight...never has been an issue. My son isn't underweight either...really...he is short...but I am short...all of my kids are short...not abnormally short....just not tall. Make sense? does his thinking apply in this situation? He thinks because the "normal" person thinks this way, our son thinks this way even more...and if "normal" people have to make an effort to avoid this trap....he will have to make even a more asserted effort. I don't know...I can see his point too... but like what was said here...teen age boys are hungry boys. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Innisfree Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 I would not worry about the cereal per se, but would think about whether the real issue is flexibility. For example, is he thinking "I must fill the bowl because I always fill the bowl", or is he just hungry, as others have suggested? If you see that kind of inflexibility in multiple settings, I'd be more concerned with getting an evaluation and diagnosis because that would give you access to help. In the meantime you can also just practice flexibility in various situations. Try doing things in different ways and see how he responds: different routes to the store, different dishes for foods, different order for school subjects. If he's perfectly willing to vary his cereal routine, I'd be less concerned than if he's really stuck on the bowl issue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
go_go_gadget Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Right, my ds eats 4000cal a day too---but OP's may not have the body awareness to be able to apply the concept of eating until full. I also think just carb-ing out is unhealthy and can lead to glucose swings; better to teach him to eat a bowl of cereal...and then eat half a dozen eggs mixed in an omelette or something. Odds are if he is kissing the spectrum that he is avoiding fruits and veggies and other healthy eating practices. Teaching portion control opens the discussion on how to make healthy choices in eating. I can't speak at all with respect to the spectrum aspect, but the quoted is important for everyone. If he's not gaining weight from the extra food, then he's using it and needs it. However, cereal isn't where he should be getting the extra food. If he needs more nutrition, fine, but no one needs more cereal. I wouldn't worry about the portion control as such, but would focus on macronutrient ratios. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 does his thinking apply in this situation? He thinks because the "normal" person thinks this way, our son thinks this way even more...and if "normal" people have to make an effort to avoid this trap....he will have to make even a more asserted effort. That may have some merit in your son's situation, but it may not. The idea that someone with ASD will have to make a more concerted effort than the neurotypical person to establish good portion control or to not be influenced by the size of the bowl/plate - I've never heard that. Many people with ASD have sensory issues with different foods and that can result in a diet limited in variety, which sometimes causes nutritional deficits. As someone with ASD, he is more likely to need to make a concerted effort to cope with the challenges he will face in the social arena. The only thing I would worry about food wise at this point is table manners, honestly. Cutting food into appropriate sizes so that he can chew with his lips closed, not making excessive noise while eating, not talking while he has food in his mouth, how to pass on food he doesn't care for without someone's feelings, to take a spoonful or one of an item so that others have food to eat, too, things like that. Also, learning the "give & take" of a dinner conversation can be difficult for someone with ASD to master as well, so it deserve some attention, I think. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katy Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Most adults don't have the skill of portion control when it comes to different dishes. I wouldn't expect that of a 13 year old boy. You can mention it, but I wouldn't stress over that AT ALL when he's small. I select salad plates for MY meals because I find I eat twice as a much on the huge dinner plates we have, even if I'm conscious of it. If he's small he needs the calories. But perhaps he should be getting them from a spinach omelet, two slices of bacon, and an orange rather than from cereal. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Even if he isn't overweight, I would teach proper portion sizes. It is just another aspect about teaching our kids about nutrition. Get out the measuring cup or scale. If he is still hungry after that serving, he can get more, but he should be aware of how much he is eating. With my oldest (who is skinny as a rail), I had to teach him about portion sizes, not for calorie restriction but more about a balanced diet. He was eating too many carbs (like almost a box of granola cereal a day) and was crashing from blood sugar lows. We had to work on portion sizes and balancing carbs and protein for the blood sugar issue. But I also used that we need to eat a variety of foods. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoPlaceLikeHome Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 my husband thinks that the psychology behind bigger plates and bowls is the problem. Companies are making bigger plates and bowls to get people to eat more because we naturally eat what we put on our plates...and we naturally think we need to fill them up...thus we eat more than needed. None of our family is over weight...never has been an issue. My son isn't underweight either...really...he is short...but I am short...all of my kids are short...not abnormally short....just not tall. Make sense? does his thinking apply in this situation? He thinks because the "normal" person thinks this way, our son thinks this way even more...and if "normal" people have to make an effort to avoid this trap....he will have to make even a more asserted effort. I don't know...I can see his point too... but like what was said here...teen age boys are hungry boys. Totally agree about bigger plates and bowls being a problem. In fact, I think I have read of research on this issue and how folks tend to eat more when they use bigger dishes. I myself purposely try to use the smaller bowls and plates we have since they help to control portions and visually are more satisfying than a bigger dish half full. Also, my kid is at risk of obesity due to his parents being overweight so I offer fruit and veggies when he wants second helpings. I agree teen boys are hungry but I can also see my kid cheerfully overeating just like me so I try to offer a variety of healthy foods. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 One big bowl of cereal sounds normal or even not enough. However you could do some maths work on capacity, working with transferring between bowls etc. if he already understands that then it shouldn't really be an issue. You could introduce him to portion size but I'd be concerned about it becoming an obsession. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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