Ignore this thread!

[KrissiK]

I am very unhappy right now.

I cannot like this!!

 

What's got you bent??

[Renai]

When I moved here, I started using my stepdad's last name - veteran, the guy who raised me, that's all. I went to the ssa and made sure all was right with the government so they could continue to collect my taxes. Three years later, I got married and my last name changed again. Both my girls have my stepdad's name and my husband's, and stepdad's name is on the marriage license. Because I have no proof of name change from maiden to stepdad's name, I no longer qualify for a driver's license. Apparently, the fact that I have a birth certificate and social security number that has followed me since birth isn't enough proof that the government knows who I am.

 

ETA: because I can't spell when angry

Edited August 17, 2017 by Renai

[Renai]

I broke the thread.

[Slache]

I broke the thread.

 

Oh, please. If it were possible I'd have done it a loooong time ago.

[KrissiK]

I am so sorry, Renai!! That is stupid. But bureaucracies are seldom rational, logical or efficient.

[Critterfixer]

:grouphug: Renai. That is such foolishness.

[Critterfixer]

I cut the words. 2,500 of them. Now it's time to make dinner.

[AMJ]

Well, our deck repair project has gone to heck in a hand basket this morning.  They ripped up the bad boards and can't find lumber in stock to replace.  I'm not sure if we're going to patch off of 12' boards or if we're going to re-deck the whole flooring at twice the cost of what we estimated.

 

Also, my dr messed up my Rx and gave me too little. 

 

Finally, I'm down to my last Pepsi and can't leave the house.

 

My week rolleth on.  I'd frankly prefer hot steaming piles, because I could at least turn that into fertilizer with time.

 

 

:grouphug:  :grouphug:

[AMJ]

Ok, girls, I need honesty here. 

 

DS has to do outside reading for his English class. And he has to do a report on it or something.  He doesn't read. He knows how to read. He's a good reader. But I don't think he can focus enough to  sit down and read a book. I've done all his book report reading for him. Aloud. He listens, of course. And actually, he loves to be read aloud to. He will listen for an hour if I'd make it that long. And I read aloud to him every night, whether it's warranted for school or not. Right now we're in the middle of CS Lewis' "Space Trilogy".  So, the question is.... do I read aloud his outside reading to him? If I made him do it by himself,  he wouldn't do it. He just wouldn't. He doesn't care enough about his grades. If I read it aloud to him, then he would know the story, we could talk about it and then he could do the report.  So, I'm leaning toward doing that.... actually, I will do that, but then, the question is.... do I mention this to his teacher? The assumption is that he would read to himself. What high school kid's mom still reads aloud to him? But, I'm afraid if I ask her, she'd say he has to do the reading. And then he wouldn't. I don't want to be deceptive, but I feel like her purpose is for kids to get into literature and I think for the most part, if I were reading aloud to him, that would be fulfilling that purpose.

 

So, what do y'all think?

 

 

My DH has always been a slow reader, possibly mildly dyslexic.  In high school he started listening to his required reading -- books on tape, always the unabridged versions.  He'd listen to them in the car on his way to and from school and activities and such, and would listen to them in his room when he was tidying up or folding laundry or such.  His English teacher once said it was clear that he was perhaps the only student in the class who actually READ the books.

 

Now we have Audible.  DH LOVES Audible.  DH has also gotten DD16 addicted to Audible, too.  There's a lot of good stuff to be had on Audible.

 

And libraries often check out audiobook CDs, too.  Just be sure to get the unabridged ones for full exposure to the lit.

[Slache]

The kids are watching Mr. Sponge aka Spongebob at the oil change place.

[AMJ]

DH got back from his business trip in time to take DD13 to Aikido, so I can stay home with DD16 and help her in her post-tooth-extraction-op recovery.  And he brought me tiramisu!   :001_wub:  :001_wub:  :001_wub:

 

 

While DD's mouth was still numb earlier she could only drink liquids, no solids.  During that time she drank half a gallon of chicken soup broth.  When the numbness wore off she was allowed to start eating soft foods, so she asked for more soup, but with the noodles this time.  She had another quart of chicken soup, with triple the noodles (all of the noodles from the other two quarts added in).  She ate it all.  Plus 4 jello cups.  I had to remind her she is not allowed Triscuits for several days.

 

I'm making her Cream of Wheat for supper.

[AMJ]

You could read to him or get an audiobook. I don't see anything wrong with it. I would sometimes read to Dancer when she was in school, and it never crossed my mind that I needed to mention it to the teacher. I have no qualms about parents reading to high school students.

 

 

Some things are just better when read aloud.  In college my BFF and I used to get together to share a story.  We took turns reading to each other.  Being read to also works wonders when one has a headache or is sick with the flu.

[ikslo]

I would push for him to read the books himself, but settle for audio. Definitely the unabridged, like AMJ suggests, though.

 

I started to read a modified version of Treasure Island to DS a few months ago, and threw it across the room, startling DS who thought I had lost my mind. Now we are reading the unabridged for MCT, and I read a bit of that unabridged to DS again, right after a chapter of the real thing. My DS is starting to have a new appreciation for "The Classics".

[AMJ]

Reading doesn't make him anxious, he's just got generalized anxiety. Period. But it's like, he loves the books I've chosen, and they are all over the board....this year we've read "A Wrinkle in Time", "The Witch of Blackbird Pond", "The Perilous Road", "Carry on, Mr. Bowditch", "The Outsiders", "Dave at Night", "Farmer Boy", "Out of the Silent Planet". And he has loved every one of them, but he would never have read them himself. I never realized he had this "problem" reading because he always read aloud to me when I homeschooled him. And he did fine. But in 7th grade he had to do a book report. He claimed to have "read" White Fang and cut and pasted the book report. Ha!! That didn't fly with me. Thus, me reading to him commenced.

 

 

It could be he is strongly an auditory learner, too.  Another thing to try is to have him read his assigned reading aloud to you or other family.  The fun gets shared, and he still does the reading.  That auditory component might be something his brain actually needs.

[AMJ]

I am very unhappy right now.

 

 

:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug: !

[AMJ]

When I moved here, I started using my stepdad's last name - veteran, the guy who raised me, that's all. I went to the ssa and made sure all was right with the government so they could continue to collect my taxes. Three years later, I got married and my last name changed again. Both my girls have my stepdad's name and my husband's, and stepdad's name is on the marriage license. Because I have no proof of name change from maiden to stepdad's name, I no longer qualify for a driver's license. Apparently, the fact that I have a birth certificate and social security number that has followed me since birth isn't enough proof that the government knows who I am.

 

ETA: because I can't spell when angry

 

 

:cursing:  :cursing:  :cursing:  :cursing:

[AMJ]

I would push for him to read the books himself, but settle for audio. Definitely the unabridged, like AMJ suggests, though.

 

I started to read a modified version of Treasure Island to DS a few months ago, and threw it across the room, startling DS who thought I had lost my mind. Now we are reading the unabridged for MCT, and I read a bit of that unabridged to DS again, right after a chapter of the real thing. My DS is starting to have a new appreciation for "The Classics".

 

 

I used to spend all of my allowance on Scholastic books when I was a kid.  The year I bought Heidi I was given two more copies of Heidi for my birthday (one from Mom and one from Grandma).  My surprise and anger at how much of the story was missing from my Scholastic copy had me finally considering that I might want to spend my allowance elsewhere.  Mom really ramped up my visits to the public library at that point.

[AMJ]

My MCT LA stuff is finally in.  Tomorrow I will get to spend some quality time switching my brain over to upcoming school year, I think.

 

Now, what can DD16 do for some beginner high school French?....  And DD13 for ASL?....

[Susan in TN]

I broke the thread.

We're all speechless. (((Renai)))

[Another Lynn]

I HATE FREAKIN LAZINESS!! I ACTUALLY ABHOR IT!! I AM ABOUT TO LOSE MY S**T!!

It's my fault. Sorry.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

😂

[Slache]

We were there too long. I could just see my kids' IQ dropping watching the entertainment. John asked if we could buy the Mr. Sponge movie. I explained the difference between a movie and a TV show and some woman gave me a look of disgust. I was so proud.

[Another Lynn]

(((Renai)))

 

If you file legal documents changing your name from birth certificate to step dads (and again from step dads to married) does it solve their issue? (Not that you should have to do it, nor is it logical!!)

 

We need an attorney on staff!

Edited August 17, 2017 by Another Lynn

[Another Lynn]

Krissi, since he read to you when you homeschooled, I would lean towards sharing the reading with him, but all of it together and aloud. ("Popcorn" style, some call it. )

[Renai]

(((Renai)))

 

If you file legal documents changing your name from birth certificate to step dads (and again from step dads to married) does it solve their issue? (Not that you should have to do it, nor is it logical!!)

 

We need an attorney on staff!

 

A legal name change is over a thousand dollars.

[Renai]

And if the federal government can follow me through my name changes, I shouldn't have to go through a bunch of legal and monetary hoops just to be able to drive. 

[Another Lynn]

A legal name change is over a thousand dollars.

No way!!!!!! I did it years ago (decided to add my maiden name back as a middle name) for nothing. Or maybe a very low filing fee - $25-ish? $1000 is insane!!!

[Renai]

No way!!!!!! I did it years ago (decided to add my maiden name back as a middle name) for nothing. Or maybe a very low filing fee - $25-ish? $1000 is insane!!!

 

I didn't go through the court, I went through the social security office. As long as the federal government kept track, it really didn't matter.

[Renai]

And even if I wanted to, I don't see how it can be backdated 18 years anyway.

Edited August 17, 2017 by Renai

[Junie]

(((Renai)))

[Junie]

I am so sorry, Renai!! That is stupid. But bureaucracies are seldom rational, logical or efficient.

 

So.much.truth.

[Susan in TN]

I am not enjoying the idea of leaving dd19 at a stupid university tomorrow.

[Junie]

(((Susan)))

[prairiewindmomma]

Renai, when I pulled up the forms and procedure, it looked like the total fees, including 2 weeks publication in newspaper, would be $250ish.  That's nothing to sniff at, but it's certainly better than $100.  I think filing a petition to create clarity would be good.  

[Renai]

Renai, when I pulled up the forms and procedure, it looked like the total fees, including 2 weeks publication in newspaper, would be $250ish. That's nothing to sniff at, but it's certainly better than $100. I think filing a petition to create clarity would be good.

We don't have $250. It is for current name changes. It is also ridiculous considering I have a paper trail with the ssa. I even found an old driver's license this state gave me with the name they now have a problem with. If I have a continuous record with a federal agency, even through name changes, from infanthood to today, a piddly mvd should be able to document that trail. I used my dad's name for three years 18 years ago, using the means that was perfectly legal at that time. I don't need to be punished for that.

[JoJosMom]

We don't have $250. It is for current name changes. It is also ridiculous considering I have a paper trail with the ssa. I even found an old driver's license this state gave me with the name they now have a problem with. If I have a continuous record with a federal agency, even through name changes, from infanthood to today, a piddly mvd should be able to document that trail. I used my dad's name for three years 18 years ago, using the means that was perfectly legal at that time. I don't need to be punished for that.

Renai, would going to a smaller branch, like in an outlying town, possibly make it easier? I know that here, when one has a challenging situation that requires bureaucratic flexibility, one goes to the town to the north of us.

[luuknam]

No one bookmarks anymore. It's all about Pinterest.

 

 

I still bookmark the occasional thing. I don't pinterest, because of the signing up to even be able to see anything-thing. I mostly just open tabs and leave them open (remember that tab-junkie thread a while back?). Either way, I don't think it really matters what medium one choose to store stuff in to forget about it. 

 

Ok, girls, I need honesty here. 

 

My 2 cents. No, I would not tell his teacher. That said, unless he's got a disability, I would not simply read everything to him either, nor have him use audiobooks for everything. I don't care if *everything* is read using his own eyes, but I think it's a good skill to learn (and as with any skill, scaffolding at first is fine or necessary or w/e). I'd maybe have him sit and read for a few minutes and then have him jot down a couple of sentences about what he's read, and then read a few minutes, or w/e... break it up, make sure he's focussed (I never take notes while reading, but in this case it sounds like your kid could benefit from doing so... (and maybe I could benefit from doing so too, I just never do)). When you see him putting in effort, reward it. Wrt the fake book reports, if he does stuff like that, I'd have him write book reports at the kitchen table or w/e, without having a computer or w/e means available to cheat (if he needs to type up the reports, he could either type them up after handwriting them, or you could just disable the internet while he types on his computer). I wouldn't be happy about having to police that to prevent copy-and-paste book reports, but it'd be less time than reading entire books out loud, so from that perspective it's not a big deal.

 

Realistically, he might need to be taught *how* to write a book report... I seriously struggled with that, even though I'd read the books and loved reading (that said, I may or may not be on the spectrum). I didn't really get the point... I thought I was supposed to offer interesting, original insights (I mean, it's called literary analysis), but really, no graduate theses are required for high school book reports. They pretty much do  want you to write boring predictable stuff. Once I understood what was desired, my grades went from 2/10 and being accused of not having read the books (12th grade) to A (ENGL 1302 at CC the summer I turned 24). Ironically, some of my classmates in 12th grade who got 7/10 or even 8/10 said they'd read only a couple of the books on the booklist of a dozen books or w/e... but they'd read the Cliff's Notes (I hadn't), and they knew what the teacher wanted. I'd read every.single.book, and I loved reading and had read many non-required books as well. But I didn't know what I was supposed to say (that final that I got 2/10 on and was accused by both teachers I hadn't read the books was oral, but I did pretty badly on the written book reports in the years leading up to that. I'd asked the teacher many times to explain what I was supposed to do, but never gotten an answer I could understand (now, IF I'm indeed on the spectrum, it's understandable that the teacher couldn't figure out how to get me to understand). Incidentally, I flunked art appreciation for the same reason... ended up with a 4/10 on that, but luckily in NL you can flunk one subject and still graduate if your GPA is high enough (I got a 5.5 iirc on my overall Dutch final, because my essay writing etc pulled my abysmal literature analysis score up... that's like a D or something, and my overall GPA for all subjects was 7.42, which is well above average... grade inflation is not a thing in NL (or at least wasn't when I graduated)). I also managed to get an A on art appreciation in CC at 24yo, same reason... I finally understood what I was supposed to do (I'm sure the additional maturity didn't hurt either).  

 

 

And if the federal government can follow me through my name changes, I shouldn't have to go through a bunch of legal and monetary hoops just to be able to drive. 

 

 

I agree, but realistically, you don't have many options. You've got to jump through whatever hoops at whatever cost to get it fixed... DW drove without a license for quite a number of years (the first few years she wasn't aware she didn't have a license*), but it's super stressful, you can't get insurance (which means you're financially ruined if there's a car accident... of course, our income then was below the poverty line, so it wouldn't really have mattered, but if you aren't broke, it'd be expensive if you get sued), it's legally not a good situation, etc. 

 

*When she was hospitalized for mental health reasons he license was temporarily suspended (automatic thing), and she should've gotten it (automatically) unsuspended when she left the hospital... but somehow that didn't happen. Since she had the physical license, she didn't even know she was driving without a license until she went to renew it. At that point, the DMV wanted a note from a psychiatrist saying she was safe to drive... but since it'd been years since the hospitalization, *they* didn't want to sign that, and no new psychiatrist wanted to sign it either, for liability reasons, not without first seeing her for multiple visits over many months, which we didn't have the money for. Now, *eventually* she got a psychiatrist to sign off on her being safe to drive, but ugh. Once she knew she was driving without a license she became a *very* defensive driver, btw... and she obviously did not have any accidents or tickets in the roughly a decade of driving without a license... but yeah, stressful. Especially the one time our truck got a flat in the HOV lane.  :svengo: (I'd tried to learn to drive, but both MIL and the driving instructor we paid were terrible (and we couldn't afford to just pay however many driving instructors hoping to find a good one), and DW was unwilling to try to teach me to drive while she didn't have a license... she taught me pretty quickly after she got her license back). 

[Slache]

I'm sorry I've been no help to anyone lately. You're all out of my depth.

[Renai]

 Either way, I don't think it really matters what medium one choose to store stuff in to forget about it. 

 

My comment was said tongue-in-cheek. I was kidding.

 

 

I agree, but realistically, you don't have many options. You've got to jump through whatever hoops at whatever cost to get it fixed... 

 

No. There are always options.

 

[Renai]

Renai, would going to a smaller branch, like in an outlying town, possibly make it easier? I know that here, when one has a challenging situation that requires bureaucratic flexibility, one goes to the town to the north of us.

 

I don't think so, it's usually harder because I'd have to go outside my county.

[luuknam]

Well, yes, there are always options. You've got the option of driving without a license (which has major drawbacks... even if you can keep your car insured because someone else in your household is licensed, they'll probably refuse to pay out if you get in an accident while being unlicensed), or the option of using other transportation options and never driving again (not very practical in most of the US either), or the option of jumping through whatever hoops they tell you to jump through (but, there might be different hoop pathways to get to your destination... expect lots of being on hold with bureaucrats who don't know either, and who'll think it's ridiculous too, but in the mean time, "can't do anything"... see video below), or maybe you could move to a different state (not sure if that would work) or a different country (probably would work, but probably not desirable either), or who knows? 

 

[Renai]

Luuknaam, we will disagree on this. And that's okay. Oh, and even if I wanted to leave the country I wouldn't be able to. I need the driver's license to renew my passport.

[ikslo]

My boss just got a promotion. What it means for me I'm not sure, short of added stress. 😒

 

I'm thinking I should quit and get a job watering plants or something. I'm sure Lowe's would take me back. So glad you all agree with me. I'll put in my application tomorrow.

[ikslo]

Renai, that stinks worse than cauliflower farts. I hope you find a way to resolve this without the ENB, but we're here to caress those nincompoops with our toes if need be.

[JoJosMom]

I don't think so, it's usually harder because I'd have to go outside my county.

Bummer. Here we can go to any county's DMV, but I know that isn't always the way it's done. 😞

[Renai]

My boss just got a promotion. What it means for me I'm not sure, short of added stress. 😒

 

I'm thinking I should quit and get a job watering plants or something. I'm sure Lowe's would take me back. So glad you all agree with me. I'll put in my application tomorrow.

 

Wait, what?! Is your job in trouble?

[Slache]

I had a dream with the thing and the stuff. I don't even want HBO. None of it even makes any sense!

[Renai]

Why does it smell like baby diaper where I'm sitting??!!! This doesn't make sense either. Alex, is that you?

[luuknam]

Why does it smell like baby diaper where I'm sitting??!!! This doesn't make sense either. Alex, is that you?

 

 

Oddly enough, I thought I smelled pee about an hour ago as well. 

[KrissiK]

I think I am out of printer ink. But, that's ok. I've printed all the things.

 

I found a house I want to buy. I put in an inquiry with the real estate agent.

 

Ikslo, watering plants at Lowes sounds wonderful. See if they'll hire us both.

 

Renai, I have no suggestions. Just hugs! But not Huggies. Or Pampers. or Luvs.

 

Slashie, we don't have HBO. They do not impress me.

 

Hugs for Susan!!!!!

 

Hugs for Angi!!!

 

I'm going to bed now!!!!

 

 

Edited August 18, 2017 by KrissiK

[Jean in Newcastle]

Hi.  I've been on Mt. Rainier all day.  No cell service.  Not that I would have been sitting on my phone all day since I was busy talking or looking or walking or driving. 

 

I'm really glad that we rented a wheelchair for my mom.  I took her to the lodge / visitor's center where they had a really well done exhibit.  I felt like I was homeschooling my mom as we went through the exhibits.  She really learned a lot too.  On our way home she would recite different things she had learned for the others who had missed the exhibit.  (Some of the others went on a hike.)

 

Remember my brother who I think is undiagnosed Aspie?  He had some repeated meltdowns today.  Not meltdown meltdowns (as in he didn't create a scene) but he was getting upset and rigid about some weird things.  At one point he was angrily arguing with me over the stupidest thing - and the argument went EXACTLY the way that sort of argument goes with my Aspie son.  Exactly.  I actually started laughing because it was so surreal.  And then he was mad because I laughed and wasn't upset like he was. . .   

 

We had a really beautiful day.  Long though.  We left at 10:30 and didn't get home until 10 pm.  Even my mom, the 92 year old Energizer bunny, was tired by the end. 

Edited August 18, 2017 by Jean in Newcastle