ProudGrandma Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 UPDATE: we have come to a good solution...I am done venting...so I would prefer if this thread be left to die. thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I see it your way. The answer to "why do they need to" is the same to why he needs to watch his sports - because it is entertaining and is something they like to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Hmm. I have mixed feelings on this. Personally I do not watch any TV, nor do my kids when they are with me. BUT on Sundays, they are with my sister, and she watches sports with them. I think it's good for them to watch sports because they should know about something that is a big deal in our culture (family culture and wider culture). It's also good for them to do something "as a family" even though not everyone in the group has the exact same love for the activity. If they don't want to watch, they can most certainly read a book or play with their toys. It's not like there is nothing else to do. When I was a kid, there was only 1 TV (when it worked!). We either watched or we didn't watch. In my house now, there is 1 TV in the common area; the other one is in an adult's bedroom / home office, and the kids are not free to use it unless invited. They don't even think the option of "watching something else" exists. So I would personally steer away from having the 2nd TV on. I realize that now you have started the tradition, and it will be hard to stop it. But I think I would stop it anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 :D there are reasons why no DH bashing is allowed. and I think one of the reasons is that you will probably get everyone here on your side and it will make you feel more unhappy about a no-win situation. When I was little my mother use to cut up the TV areal cord regularly. As my father was an electrician he would make a new one, but he always waited at least a week for my mother to cool down a little. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amo_mea_filiis. Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I agree with the kids and you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Both parents need to make this decision together............ and I do think your dh is being unfair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted November 30, 2013 Author Share Posted November 30, 2013 Honestly, I am not trying to bash my husband. I wanted to know if I was the only one who felt the way I do. I don't care if my husband watches his game...but I just didn't think it was fair to prevent the other kids from wanting to watch TV too. SO...I honestly don't think this is going to change...so I need to figure out how to make it "ok" with my other 2 kids who feel it's unfair. No matter what I say to them doesn't matter, because they already know I disagree with their dad...and yes, I know that is BAD on my part. So what do I say to them? to their dad? How do I make this "right"?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ewe Mama Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I would talk with dh and come to an understanding that TV time is a time when one or all of the tvs are allowed to be operating, regardless of how many people are actually watching them. For example, the game is on from 1-3, so all tv's are allowed to be on from 1-3. If that is not acceptable to him, then say that each person can have a certain amount of time per week and claim the tv, but only that person can watch during for that specific time slot. It really stinks when dh breaks all the tv guidelines we have carefully established. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ewe Mama Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Oops. Double post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Honestly, I am not trying to bash my husband. I wanted to know if I was the only one who felt the way I do. I don't care if my husband watches his game...but I just didn't think it was fair to prevent the other kids from wanting to watch TV too. SO...I honestly don't think this is going to change...so I need to figure out how to make it "ok" with my other 2 kids who feel it's unfair. No matter what I say to them doesn't matter, because they already know I disagree with their dad...and yes, I know that is BAD on my part. So what do I say to them? to their dad? How do I make this "right"?? I don't think anyone sees a problem with your dh watching the game with one son. The problem is not letting the others watch something else. There is no way for you to explain it to them, as it is simply not "fair". You have as much of a say in what happens as your dh... And you could certainly go watch a show during that time, with the other kids. I guess I can't understand where your dh is coming from, at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Well, first off, I don't think that wives and husbands have to always agree. And while I don't think that we should involve the kids in our disagreement, I don't think that kids should be only shown a fake view of marriage. As to the problem: it really comes back to why you have such restricted screen time. If it is to allow for family activities that don't take place in front of a screen, then this time should be exempt because your husband's choice is to allow screen time during that time slot. And if he insists on having that screen time for himself and your ds but no one else, then they should be exempt another time when the girls and you get to watch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 *You* can watch something on the other TV, and if the other kids want to watch it they can join you. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Honestly, I am not trying to bash my husband. I wanted to know if I was the only one who felt the way I do. I don't care if my husband watches his game...but I just didn't think it was fair to prevent the other kids from wanting to watch TV too. SO...I honestly don't think this is going to change...so I need to figure out how to make it "ok" with my other 2 kids who feel it's unfair. No matter what I say to them doesn't matter, because they already know I disagree with their dad...and yes, I know that is BAD on my part. So what do I say to them? to their dad? How do I make this "right"?? Here we have the situation that we have 1 TV. It only goes on in the evenings. The kids might be watching a movie and it only has 20-15 minutes left. DH will come in and change the channel to something he wants to watch. It happens all the time. I have told the kids that one day they will be the Dad and they can then have control of the remote. I can see DH's point he wants to come in and sit down and watch something he likes and relax. It bugged me so much that I stopped watching TV altogether and started online studying in the evenings. The upside is that I have almost completed a bachelors degree in my evening studies Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OrganicAnn Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 So if you want to watch something on the other tv for several hours and the kids want to watch with you, then that would be okay with your husband? I would just stop what I was doing whenever football was on TV and go into the other room and relax and watch tv for the exact same amount of time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
extendedforecast Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 While he is watching sports, I would feel the sudden urge to watch a family friendly movie, and whoever likes to watch said movies is welcome to come join me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I would tell my kids that learning sports is important enough to allow an exception to the "no TV" rule. Everyone should understand the basics of sports because when you grow up and go to work, that's what people are going to be talking about. Like it or not, being ignorant of sports is a disadvantage in some work places that have absolutely nothing to do with sports. Anyhoo, that's an angle you can take if you are really looking for one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OrganicAnn Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I would tell my kids that learning sports is important enough to allow an exception to the "no TV" rule. Everyone should understand the basics of sports because when you grow up and go to work, that's what people are going to be talking about. Like it or not, being ignorant of sports is a disadvantage in some work places that have absolutely nothing to do with sports. Anyhoo, that's an angle you can take if you are really looking for one. Oh I disagree. People don't have to know sports. Lots of people know nothing about sports even in areas of the country that a sports mad. It just doesn't really matter. Now some people would like that to be true, as an excuse to watch sports but doesn't matter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTMCassandra Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 We don't have a TV and my husband and I both hate sports (and by the way still survived in the working world), but I still think the rule is unfair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 You want to see it another way? I see it as a grown man who is free to use his TV as he sees fit, and 3 children who are free to join him or not, according to their own preferences. As children they don't get a say into "what's on" when an adult has already made that decision. All 3 kids have the same choice: watch "what's on" (adult choice) or watch nothing. Choosing to watch nothing is a freedom, not a punishment. Choosing to watch "what's on" is also a freedom, but not mandatory. Living in a house where adults have the "rank" to choose what's on -- not negotiate with children or take turns with children is normal. It's "fair" because all children were offered the same thing: two just chose not to take it. It's like offering all your children a popsicle. If a child says, "No thanks, I don't like popsicles." -- no injustice has been done. You don't have to jump through hoops just because a child says 'no thanks'. But why not just let them watch netflix or kids TV on another screen? Obviously there is a computer or smartphone or something in the house in addition to the TV. It sounds a bit like your (noble) desire to limit screen time is showing a bit of a dark side. Could it be that you might be happier if you had some greater flexibility in your screen-time solutions? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 If you have such limited screen time, why do you have more than one tv? My first thought is that your husband is wrong, so over-rule him. My second thought is to move to a ticket economy. Every kid gets x number of tickets for x amount of tv time. If one son wants to spend his watching sports with dad, that's his choice. The other kids can make their own choices how to spend theirs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Oh I disagree. People don't have to know sports. Lots of people know nothing about sports even in areas of the country that a sports mad. It just doesn't really matter. Now some people would like that to be true, as an excuse to watch sports but doesn't matter. Well, I've lived it. I joined an accounting firm without having a clue about basketball. Big mistake. I guess you'll have to take my word for it. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Another thing. When my kids fight or whine about something, it gets taken away. That way they come to realize that their happiness does not depend on having their way all the time. Oh well. I would never give my kids something extra as a result of their whining over what has been offered not being good enough. I'm sorry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Could it be that you might be happier if you had some greater flexibility in your screen-time solutions? I think this is definitely worth considering and discussing. The OP says, "We live in a home where there is very restricted screen time." That passive construction makes it sound like you and your DH (primarily DH?) aren't the ones setting those restrictions. You can change them if they aren't working. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted November 30, 2013 Author Share Posted November 30, 2013 While he is watching sports, I would feel the sudden urge to watch a family friendly movie, and whoever likes to watch said movies is welcome to come join me. I would do that, but usually during this time, I am trying to catch up on things that I didn't get done during the week and I don't have the luxury of sitting down for 2 hours to watch a movie...but that is not my kids' fault either...why should they be punished because I can't take the time to sit. Not to mention that the room where the other TV is there are no chairs...everybody sits on the floor...and my back can't handle that. Anyway...I guess I just need to punt this one...stop crabbing...it's not going to change. I am just glad to know I am not the only one who can't see this. thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Why is not watching TV a punishment? Serious question. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustEm Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 There are 2 things I would do. One would be to just allow my other 2 children to watch a show and ignore dh's side because his response of "why do they need to? " is not a response it is deflection. If he can't come up with a reasonable explanation to why he thinks they should not be allowed to watch tv when him and his other child are allowed to then he doesn't get to make that decision. Or I would, make my other 2 children stay in the room where the sport is being watched. They can do whatever they want while they are in there and if it distracts from the game then dh can suck it up because since it isn't officially tv time there is no reason the other children can't play normally in the area the tv is on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted November 30, 2013 Author Share Posted November 30, 2013 I think this is definitely worth considering and discussing. The OP says, "We live in a home where there is very restricted screen time." That passive construction makes it sound like you and your DH (primarily DH?) aren't the ones setting those restrictions. You can change them if they aren't working. most of the time it works just fine...this is one time they don't. My DH won't see the need to make any changes.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plink Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I would just tell DH that I really want to accomplish xyz on game day and let him know that I need the kids occupied in order to get my work done, so I asked them to watch something in the other room. Moms need a break too. It is okay rest while the other members of the family are resting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Are there any educational videos that your kids enjoy? Maybe he'd see the point of them watching those during the time he's watching sports. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlmiraGulch Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I understand the point of view of "It's what's on, so watch it or not," except that it does favor your one child who likes football over the two who don't. Sorry, but I'd overrule here. How you choose to keep your children entertained while your husband watches football is entirely up to you. If he wants them to do something else, he's welcome to turn off the TV and do it with all three of them, but if it's up to you, as the other adult in the house, to determine what they do, then you really do get final say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustEm Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I would also conveniently have the power cord to both televisions go missing until dh sat down and had a reasonable discussion about it and came to some sort of compromise that would allow for things run smoothly year round. Maybe during football season everyone can watch tv during a game but no other time that day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 It's "fair" because all children were offered the same thing: two just chose not to take it. It's like offering all your children a popsicle. If a child says, "No thanks, I don't like popsicles." -- no injustice has been done. You don't have to jump through hoops just because a child says 'no thanks'. We actually had the exact same situation in our family: dh and ds like to watch sports; dd doesn't. Ds routinely got to watch a lot more tv than dd did because dh had the tv on watching sports. Dd likes to watch science and cooking shows, which dh never watches. So ds got his regular tv time, watching Transformers and Digimon and the like, plus an additional 6-8 hours watching sports with dh. Dd got her normal tv time watching MythBusters and Cake Boss and got nothing additional. Really, it was unfair. Something was consistently offered that everyone knew was appealing to ds and not to dd. If popsicles were the only thing that were ever offered, knowing that one (or more) children don't like popsicles, well, then, one child is consistently getting a treat and the others are consistently being left out. While I agree that it's the adults' home and they get to watch what they want, period, I also think that loving parents go out of their way or bend the rules to make sure that one or more kids don't constantly feel like they are getting the shaft. My oldest hates chocolate. If I only ever offered chocolate cake for dessert, my dd would have a right to grumble that I wasn't making an effort to include her preferences. In reality, I think this is a small issue that is being treated like a huge one. It won't hurt the kids to allow them a bit of flexibility in the tv rules and will likely be a positive relationship builder because they won't feel like their desires are being ignored. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlmiraGulch Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I would do that, but usually during this time, I am trying to catch up on things that I didn't get done during the week and I don't have the luxury of sitting down for 2 hours to watch a movie...but that is not my kids' fault either...why should they be punished because I can't take the time to sit. Not to mention that the room where the other TV is there are no chairs...everybody sits on the floor...and my back can't handle that. Anyway...I guess I just need to punt this one...stop crabbing...it's not going to change. I am just glad to know I am not the only one who can't see this. thanks. I don't get this at all. Not one bit. What can absolutely change is how you respond to the situation. You are an adult. You are the mother. Again, if it's your job to make sure the other two are occupied while DH and DS are watching football, then it's entirely your call as to what that means, short of running off to a bar or strip club. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Hmm. My mind is changing as I read thru the posts! OK, see if you can follow this reasoning!!--- I think the problem might be defining what is being offered. Instead of lumping the two together, separate the screen time (call it TV time) from the watch-with-dad time. So, you are still offering the same amount of "screen time" but adding in the option of watching with dad (which IS screen time, but not counted as such--redefine it as Dad Time). So that makes it fair--because the 2 kids are refusing Dad Time but still get all their TV time, and the one son has chosen Dad Time AND TV time. Think of it as a Venn Diagram. Right now, it overlaps because Dad Time involves a screen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Honestly, I am not trying to bash my husband. I wanted to know if I was the only one who felt the way I do. I don't care if my husband watches his game...but I just didn't think it was fair to prevent the other kids from wanting to watch TV too. SO...I honestly don't think this is going to change...so I need to figure out how to make it "ok" with my other 2 kids who feel it's unfair. No matter what I say to them doesn't matter, because they already know I disagree with their dad...and yes, I know that is BAD on my part. So what do I say to them? to their dad? How do I make this "right"?? Not for anything, but why is this your dh's decision to make? If you want to let the kids watch TV, let them watch TV. You have as much authority in your home as your dh does, so if you feel he's being unfair, override his decision and let him suck it up and deal with it. And before anyone says I'm wrong for saying the dh can suck it up and deal with it, please note that he has been forcing her to do exactly the same thing. He made a unilateral decision and for some reason, she thinks she's not entitled to defy him. Ideally, I think she should sit down with her dh and tell him exactly what she's going to do, so she won't be springing anything on him in front of the kids, but that's just common courtesy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little Nyssa Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 The only other possibly helpful way I can think of it is, that during football season, the usual rules don't apply= watching football with Dad doesn't affect your screen-time quota. I actually would agree with you, but if I were in your situation and wanted to think about it in a somehow more flexible way, that is what I would come up with. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 As a kid, it never occurred to me to get angry that what was on TV wasn't my thing. My dad and brothers did exactly the same thing - watched football weekly or more - and I didn't understand the game well enough to enjoy it, so I found something else to do. No drama involved. When I was in 9th grade I had to write papers about the different major pro sports. Once I understood the rules of football, I became a rabid fan. :) I really don't think your dh is doing anything terrible here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 As far as offering something only one kid likes, well, I'm ok with that. It's like a kid who has a wide palate--they are going to get what they like for dinner a lot more often than a kid who is picky. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlmiraGulch Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 But if the other kids can go and watch what they want on another TV, why is this a problem? This is the part I don't understand. So it's either watch what Dad wants to watch or nothing at all? Why? That's the point. DH doesn't want to allow any extra screen time for anyone. In his eyes, the football game is what HE wants, not what the kids want, so if they want to stay and watch that, it's fine, otherwise it's a no go. If the one son weren't watching football, he wouldn't be allowed to watch anything else, either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlmiraGulch Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Hmm. My mind is changing as I read thru the posts! OK, see if you can follow this reasoning!!--- I think the problem might be defining what is being offered. Instead of lumping the two together, separate the screen time (call it TV time) from the watch-with-dad time. So, you are still offering the same amount of "screen time" but adding in the option of watching with dad (which IS screen time, but not counted as such--redefine it as Dad Time). So that makes it fair--because the 2 kids are refusing Dad Time but still get all their TV time, and the one son has chosen Dad Time AND TV time. Think of it as a Venn Diagram. Right now, it overlaps because Dad Time involves a screen. Only it's not really "Dad Time" at all. Dad wants to watch football, and if the kids are there then fine, and if not then that's fine, too. The kids don't enjoy football. They shouldn't be forced to watch just to sit on the couch next to their father and call it something else for the sake of a label. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 As far as offering something only one kid likes, well, I'm ok with that. It's like a kid who has a wide palate--they are going to get what they like for dinner a lot more often than a kid who is picky. That's true, and I always tell my kids I don't cater to their food pickiness. But in reality I make sure I plan meals that appeal to various kids every week. I do this because what my kids like and dislike does matter to me. I make sure that each kid gets a chance to really enjoy what is served at least once (and possibly several times) a week, even when it means serving something I'm not overly fond of. I am the adult and I am in charge of the house, but that doesn't mean that it's wise or kind to ignore what my kids like. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 If the OP is a homeschooler, then it seems to me she has plenty of control over what her kids do, and plenty of time that they spend with her doing what she wants. Some of which might be fun for some and not others. If one of the kids likes math and the others don't, do the other kids get to go read comics during math class? Why punish the kids who don't like math by stopping them from reading comics? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlmiraGulch Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 To me, it's not about what the kids want at all. It's about what the mother wants. If she wants time to get some things done, then she should be allowed to have the time she wants to get things done. If she decides to let the kids watch TV while the other one is, regardless of the programming, then that's her choice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlmiraGulch Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 If the OP is a homeschooler, then it seems to me she has plenty of control over what her kids do, and plenty of time that they spend with her doing what she wants. Some of which might be fun for some and not others. If one of the kids likes math and the others don't, do the other kids get to go read comics during math class? Why punish the kids who don't like math by stopping them from reading comics? This is not even remotely on the same page. You're comparing football to math, entertainment to education. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 To me, it's not about what the kids want at all. It's about what the mother wants. If she wants time to get some things done, then she should be allowed to have the time she wants to get things done. If she decides to let the kids watch TV while the other one is, regardless of the programming, then that's her choice. I don't get the impression that she's only disagreeing because it makes her work harder. I think she feels the non-sportsy kids are being cheated and she wants them to get some more screen time. How old are they? Can they not take care of themselves for a while so their mom can get things done? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Only it's not really "Dad Time" at all. Dad wants to watch football, and if the kids are there then fine, and if not then that's fine, too. The kids don't enjoy football. They shouldn't be forced to watch just to sit on the couch next to their father and call it something else for the sake of a label. I agree--being forced to watch a sport I don't like would be torture! lol No one is forcing the kids to watch in order to have Dad Time. They are choosing not to. I don't have a problem with that. I just see it as an offering they don't want. No harm, no foul. As far as the OP not having something to keep her kids busy, I see that as a different issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlmiraGulch Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 So in other words this is not the kid's TV time. So if they happen to want to watch what dad is watching that is fine, but otherwise it's not their time. Well, I could see as a kid feeling that is quite unfair, but adults don't necessarily have the same rules as kids. So if that's not their TV time that's not their TV time. I can see not making them leave the room because DH is watching something. And that is what is happening. Right, it's not their TV time. If both parents were on the same page with that, then no problem at all. It is what it is. Honestly, this is how it was in my house growing up. One TV, we watched what the parents wanted, and you can choose to watch or not. BUT....both parents are not on the same page here. What's bugging me is that the OP seems to think that the other kids should be allowed to watch something else while the brother watches football with the dad. So, why does her opinion and wishes not carry the same weight as the dads? That's the issue I have with this whole thing, not whether the kids get to watch football or cartoons or anything at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted November 30, 2013 Author Share Posted November 30, 2013 That's the point. DH doesn't want to allow any extra screen time for anyone. In his eyes, the football game is what HE wants, not what the kids want, so if they want to stay and watch that, it's fine, otherwise it's a no go. If the one son weren't watching football, he wouldn't be allowed to watch anything else, either. yes, that is his point...I just don't agree with his point. My son is obsesive about ANY and ALL sports games and would watch no matter what if we let him, but we don't. So there will never be a time when he won't want to watch and the other 2 know that. and that is why they feel it unfair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlmiraGulch Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I don't get the impression that she's only disagreeing because it makes her work harder. I think she feels the non-sportsy kids are being cheated and she wants them to get some more screen time. How old are they? Can they not take care of themselves for a while so their mom can get things done? I see your point, but to me it goes deeper than that. Take the focus off of the "mom wants to get things done" that I put on there and it boils down to mom apparently not having equal weight in the decision, even if it is that she feels the non-sportsy kids are being cheated. She shouldn't just be unilaterally trumped, is what I"m trying to say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted November 30, 2013 Author Share Posted November 30, 2013 I don't get the impression that she's only disagreeing because it makes her work harder. I think she feels the non-sportsy kids are being cheated and she wants them to get some more screen time. How old are they? Can they not take care of themselves for a while so their mom can get things done? this is correct. It is not about me. I can get stuff done during the day, but I just don't have the desire to sit down int he middle of the day and watch a movie, just so my kids can watch too. I just needed to get a better grip on this situation and hear other's opinions. We don't have set amount of screen time allowed each week...we feel by doing that, the kids will do anything in their power to use up their screen time no matter what. But although we restrict how much they watch, we have Friday night movie night every week, they watch Netflix on Sunday late afternoon (after the ballgame) with their dad...and sometimes during the week I will slip in something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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