Vent--Neighbor mowing my lawn

[PrairieSong]

Yeah, that doesn't sound bad, huh?  A neighbor mowing your lawn for nothing?

 

Well...about a week ago my next door neighbor knocked on my door and asked if our side yard was "a nature preserve", kind of sarcastically.  He was talking about the Johnson grass we've battled on the side of our house, the side next to his.  We pull it, I've sprayed with weed killer, etc.  It comes back. (FTR, he does not have a manicured lawn himself.)  Apparently he got his new riding lawn mower stuck in the alley behind his house, in the mud.  The only way he could get his truck back there would be to drive through our side yard.  He also asked if he could mow there.  I said, sure.  I figured it was a one-time thing, but today he mowed it AGAIN.  It's rained a lot, and the grass has grown fast.  He mowed to within four or five feet of our house, so it looks funny...until we get the rest of it mowed.  

 

It kind of ticked me, but maybe he thought I meant it was ok for him to do it indefinitely?  We had a wood fence all the way around our backyard, but a year ago we had to take it down.  It was old and falling down anyway.  They have small dogs and so they put up a chain link fence around their backyard.  We are wanting to replace ours, and I'm thinking a 6-foot privacy fence instead of a 4-foot fence.  I don't know what he'd do if he got stuck back there again...he wouldn't be taking down our new fence.  

 

I'm just venting to get this out, and probably won't be back online till tomorrow afternoon.  I realize this isn't as drastic as the neighbors who chopped down someone's tall hedge, but it still bugs me.

 

This is the same guy who used to bring his little granddaughter into our backyard to play on our trampoline, without even asking.  ????  I never did understand that.  We'd hear voices in the backyard and there they would be.  

[Ravin]

Good fences make good neighbors.

[Tap]

Speed up that fence building and I would use a weed barrier plus gravel to block the grass if you want it gone without constant maintenance.

[Annie G]

My neighbor was like that- helped cut the grass when dh had a heart attack six years ago. Evidently he feels entitled to make improvements to our yard. One summer we were working on the hosta beds on the side of our house and he came over and yanked out the edging we had, deeming it tacky- he just reached down and grabbed it, yanking it out of the ground. It was like 15 feet long but came out easily.  We were so shocked we had no idea what to say.  Then later that summer in his yard he installed THE SAME KIND OF EDGING he told us was too tacky to use. 

 

This summer ds informed us the daisies were blooming. What are you talking about, son? Well, the neighbor planted daisies behind out garage and told ds to mow around them. Ds thought we planted them and that neighbor was just reminding him not to mow them down. 

 

So...lesson learned. Some neighbors just do something to be nice but others turn a nice favor into bizarre behavior. I get why your neighbor's actions are bugging you! 

[dbmamaz]

not quite the same thing but close . . . i've had neighbors call the county on me THREE TIMES for my grass being long - each time, it was a flower bed or tree bed which needed work, not that we werent cutting the lawn.  I'm not the only one - lots of people have had the county called on them . .. for piles of garbage left out too long, for non-running cars in the driveway, for fallen shutters.  I'm honestly surprised they havent called to report me being in violation of the no-more-than-three-4-legged-furry-pets law.  

 

Anyways, I came home one day, and my lawn had been mown.  I was . . . feeling a bit paranoid.  I mean, after having neighbors call the county so much, i was kinda freaking out?  Wondering if I should take it personally?  Two neighbors had seen and NOT RECOGNIZED the skinny young man who had done it.  I asked if it was one of the teens that live next door to me, but no one knew - they are very reticent and no one has met them except me, and i'm not even sure i'd recognize them if i ran in to them at the store.

 

anyways, finally I saw the mom out in the driveway, and asked her - she said yes, she told her son to do something nice!  I figured it was because I was on crutches - she's a real redneck type, the kind, i think, thats used to neighbors doing that thing.  She doesnt fit in so well in this uppity neighborhood.  So i was sure it was not meant as an insult  - she even asked if I was upset - I said no, just confused!  

 

anyways, hope you and your neighbor figure something out

[PrairieSong]

Speed up that fence building and I would use a weed barrier plus gravel to block the grass if you want it gone without constant maintenance.

Yes, I could try that. We have irises there, too, but I'd sacrifice them to get rid of the Johnson grass.

 

You know, if the neighbor had spoken to me in a friendly way I doubt I would have been as annoyed. If he were kindly offering help. But he acted like we were a nuisance and was asking if he could take care of the problem.

[PrairieSong]

My neighbor was like that- helped cut the grass when dh had a heart attack six years ago. Evidently he feels entitled to make improvements to our yard. One summer we were working on the hosta beds on the side of our house and he came over and yanked out the edging we had, deeming it tacky- he just reached down and grabbed it, yanking it out of the ground. It was like 15 feet long but came out easily. We were so shocked we had no idea what to say. Then later that summer in his yard he installed THE SAME KIND OF EDGING he told us was too tacky to use.

 

This summer ds informed us the daisies were blooming. What are you talking about, son? Well, the neighbor planted daisies behind out garage and told ds to mow around them. Ds thought we planted them and that neighbor was just reminding him not to mow them down.

 

So...lesson learned. Some neighbors just do something to be nice but others turn a nice favor into bizarre behavior. I get why your neighbor's actions are bugging you!

Didn't you say anything? I don't think I could have kept quiet if my neighbor did that in front of me. That is bizarre.

[Parrothead]

Hmm... I've mowed the lawn for my neighbors on both sides of me. On the right is my friend who is 6 months pregnant with her first child. They are so cute about this baby. Anyway, they often are gone. She has had a lot of complications. So I mow when I notice they've been in and out a lot and über busy. They don't mind.

 

On the left is a house owned by an elderly couple. He has someone mow once a season. Unfortunately my driveway is on the edge of the property line. If I get in on the passenger side of the vehicle that is parked there I must step on to their property. Did you see the once a season? If I'm wearing something nice I get grass crap all over my skirts, dresses, and dress pants. So I mow his lawn within 2 feet of his house.

[Melissa in Australia]

:lol:

 

here everybody has a property fence. it rwould seem from this thread that it reduces lots of problems

[Annie G]

Didn't you say anything? I don't think I could have kept quiet if my neighbor did that in front of me. That is bizarre.

 

 

Well, it's like this- we're pulling weeds and he comes over and pulls a couple and makes small talk while he's doing it. Telling us we should divide the hostas because they're huge.  And then he says the edging looks like it's been there since the 70's and yanks it and it comes out in one piece. Dh and I are standing there looking at him like he has two heads- what do you say when it is over with before you can stop it? So we just told him we'd handle our own yard work, thankyouverymuch.   It all happened so quickly and he'd never done anything like that before. We were shocked!

[PrairieSong]

Hmm... I've mowed the lawn for my neighbors on both sides of me. On the right is my friend who is 6 months pregnant with her first child. They are so cute about this baby. Anyway, they often are gone. She has had a lot of complications. So I mow when I notice they've been in and out a lot and über busy. They don't mind.

 

On the left is a house owned by an elderly couple. He has someone mow once a season. Unfortunately my driveway is on the edge of the property line. If I get in on the passenger side of the vehicle that is parked there I must step on to their property. Did you see the once a season? If I'm wearing something nice I get grass crap all over my skirts, dresses, and dress pants. So I mow his lawn within 2 feet of his house.

Not once a season, twice a week apart. He has a chain link fence around his back yard and mowed on our side of the fence to with in five feet or so of our house.

[Parrothead]

Not once a season, twice a week apart. He has a chain link fence around his back yard and mowed on our side of the fence to with in five feet or so of our house.

Yeah. That is what I'm saying. I mow left neighbors yard once a wee because he won't.

 

I sympathize with you. Pushy neighbors are the pits.

[PrairieSong]

Yeah. That is what I'm saying. I mow left neighbors yard once a wee because he won't.

 

I sympathize with you. Pushy neighbors are the pits.

Gotcha. We mow ours about once a week.

[WishboneDawn]

Maybe it's the country redneck (as dbmamaz put it :D) but the appropriate response to me would be to make some cookies and take them over to the neighbor as a thank you. Maybe his tone was a little off when you and he first talked but he still did a nice thing for you.

 

To me this would be an opportunity to thank and get to know a neighbor.

[merry gardens]

"It kind of ticked me, but maybe he thought I meant it was ok for him to do it indefinitely?"

 

If it gets muddy and difficult for his riding mower, it seems logical that he was asking for permission to ride on your lawn to get out of the mud for an indefinite period of time.  He may have thought it better to do the whole side instead of leaving just one mowed strip.  If you don't want him doing this, you might just say as politely as you can that you thought he was asking to do this as a one time event and you'd much prefer that he not mow your lawn.

 

Or maybe the problem will just go away when the rain stops and he has more experience with his new mower.  But since it really bothers you, clarify that you didn't mean he could mow your lawn indefinitely.

[JustEm]

I came home from vacation last week and my neighbor had sprayed our weeds growing in the cracks of our driveway.  i'm sure it was because he was doing his and thought 'might as well do theirs too.'  He also shoveled our driveway once during a snowstorm when I was pregnant and my husband was at work.  We are in townhouses so the driveways are connected.  I was grateful that he does stuff like that.  Even if I don't want it done (like the spraying of our weeds)  it still makes me thankful that I have a neighbor who looks out for the people around him.

 

Now if he had asked to do it while making snarky comments like your neighbor I'd probably be annoyed 

[PrairieSong]

"It kind of ticked me, but maybe he thought I meant it was ok for him to do it indefinitely?"

 

If it gets muddy and difficult for his riding mower, it seems logical that he was asking for permission to ride on your lawn to get out of the mud for an indefinite period of time. He may have thought it better to do the whole side instead of leaving just one mowed strip.

But he didn't mow the whole side. He mowed a big swath leaving several feet next to our house unmowed. It looks odd. We will be mowing today.

[PrairieSong]

I came home from vacation last week and my neighbor had sprayed our weeds growing in the cracks of our driveway. i'm sure it was because he was doing his and thought 'might as well do theirs too.' He also shoveled our driveway once during a snowstorm when I was pregnant and my husband was at work. We are in townhouses so the driveways are connected. I was grateful that he does stuff like that. Even if I don't want it done (like the spraying of our weeds) it still makes me thankful that I have a neighbor who looks out for the people around him.

 

Now if he had asked to do it while making snarky comments like your neighbor I'd probably be annoyed

Sounds like your neighbor was just trying to be helpful. And yes, I could do without the snarky comments when I first opened the door.."is this some kind of nature preserve?" without even a hello. It irked me.

[SKL]

LOL.  When I first moved here, I was slow about getting my lawn handled, and our neighbor did it for us after it got ridiculously long.  It was embarrassing, but not something to be angry about one time.  We hired a service shortly thereafter.

 

However, when I read your whole post, my thought would be to be careful because he could try to claim that that part of the property he is "taking care of" belongs to him.  If you're getting a fence, I'd get it up sooner rather than later.

[PrairieSong]

LOL. When I first moved here, I was slow about getting my lawn handled, and our neighbor did it for us after it got ridiculously long. It was embarrassing, but not something to be angry about one time. We hired a service shortly thereafter.

 

However, when I read your whole post, my thought would be to be careful because he could try to claim that that part of the property he is "taking care of" belongs to him. If you're getting a fence, I'd get it up sooner rather than later.

I think it's weird that someone would do that without asking. And my neighbor is definitely on our property. He knows it. That's why he asked first.

[SKL]

I think it's weird that someone would do that without asking. And my neighbor is definitely on our property. He knows it. That's why he asked first.

 

But if you let him act like he owns it, the law could be on his side after a while, believe it or not.

 

You won't be able to prove what he has said to you.

 

[PrairieSong]

But if you let him act like he owns it, the law could be on his side after a while, believe it or not.

 

You won't be able to prove what he has said to you.

 

Even if a survey shows where the property line is?

[SKL]

Even if a survey shows where the property line is?

 

It probably depens on state law, but yeah, generally the law allows people to claim land they are taking care of if the "on paper" owner isn't doing anything overt to re-confirm the owner's claim on the land.

 

I'm drawing a blank as to the terminology for this phenomenon.

 

ETA:  I should note that this can't happen overnight, but after a period of time, which I think is 10 or 20 years in my state.  Point is that you should not let him act like he owns it.

[SKL]

Google "Adverse Possession."

[elegantlion]

My neighbor mows one line of grass on my property. Once he's done with his front yard, he cuts along our fence line because he can't get to the back yard directly from that side of the house. His deck extends that way, my fence line is open on the front. I don't care, except he mows a little shorter than we do, so it looks odd for a few days. We have tiny yards through, I don't care really. 

 

When we first moved in the other neighbor mowed for us half the summer when dh was sick and our lawn mower was broken. He has a riding mower, which would be overkill for us. In turn, we shovel his driveway in the winter. 

[msjones]

Well, it's like this- we're pulling weeds and he comes over and pulls a couple and makes small talk while he's doing it. Telling us we should divide the hostas because they're huge.  And then he says the edging looks like it's been there since the 70's and yanks it and it comes out in one piece. Dh and I are standing there looking at him like he has two heads- what do you say when it is over with before you can stop it? So we just told him we'd handle our own yard work, thankyouverymuch.   It all happened so quickly and he'd never done anything like that before. We were shocked!

 

Yup. This is just like my neighbor.  

We keep our yard nice.  It is not professionally done, but it is never neglected and looks very pleasant.

 

My neighbor wants to change it.  She suggests pruning the tree differently, dividing the various perennials, trimming things differently.  She asks when we're going to "finally do such-and-such."  Not one thing in our yard is a mess.  It just doesn't look the way she wishes it did.

 

This woman has a professional gardener and expects our yard to look professionally maintained as well.  Unless she wants to pay her help to do my yard as well, she's out of luck!  :)

[Spryte]

I agree with that 6 foot privacy fence.  ASAP.

 

FWIW, we have a 6 foot privacy fence and still deal with the neighbor's wildlife habitat.  It sounds snarky to say that, I know, but really - her weeds actually grow up taller than the 6 foot fence.  She can't open her back gate due to vines, and her deck is covered in the vines, too.  It really is like nothing I've ever seen.  The worst part is that the vines are a mix of English Ivy out of control, VA Creeper, and Poison Ivy.  They grow through our fence, invading our yard all summer.  DH is so allergic to them that he ends up at the doc's each year getting shots to get the rash under control.  It is truly miserable.  We've offered to hire someone to do the yardwork for her but she refuses.  She has issues.  :(

 

[WishboneDawn]

It probably depens on state law, but yeah, generally the law allows people to claim land they are taking care of if the "on paper" owner isn't doing anything overt to re-confirm the owner's claim on the land.

 

I'm drawing a blank as to the terminology for this phenomenon.

 

ETA: I should note that this can't happen overnight, but after a period of time, which I think is 10 or 20 years in my state. Point is that you should not let him act like he owns it.

I think that's where cookies could help. :) if there's an exchange of goods then he's doing a service for you and can't claim the land even after 40 years of mowing.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

I'm fairly certain our mowed our lawn out of annoyance the few times they did it.  I just bake them a cheesecake and say thank you very nicely.  They even hacked our shrubs down to stubs because we don't trim them often enough. The ones on the border between houses. I baked them a cheesecake and said thank you nicely.  Oh and the bushes have grown back better than before....

 

They may do it because we don't mow our lawn often enough, but that's a bunch of mowing (or trimming) we don't have to do. 

 

 

For the record we mow once a week, twice a week if it is growing like crazy and we have time. Neighbors mow every other day, even if there has been little to no growth.

[lllll]

..

[PrairieSong]

Yes, we are definitely getting a fence, most likely a 6' one. We had a 4' fence previously, but when it started falling apart the neighbor put his chain link fence right next to it, butted up against it. If we replace our fence in the same place our other one was it may cause grass to grow up in the small space between the two fences where it would be difficult to get to. We wouldn't see it but they would.

 

I am not trying to make more work or trouble for him, honestly. I just want a fence. If we leave enough space between the two fences for him to get his riding mower through it will really cut into our side yard and look weird. Wwyd?

[Pretty in Pink]

We used to have neighbors that rarely if ever mowed their lawn -- we're talking once or twice per spring/summer. Our line of houses was situated on the tree line so when their grass was tall snakes and mice would come into their yard. So yeah, I mowed a good 6 feet into their lawn where our property lines touched in hopes of keeping the critters at bay.

 

It's hard to tell from the OP whether this one section of the lawn just appeared a bit overgrown compared to the rest of her lawn due to Johnson's grass growing on that side of the house (I'm not familiar with Johnson's grass so IDK) or whether their yard is in general not maintained.

[PrairieSong]

We used to have neighbors that rarely if ever mowed their lawn -- we're talking once or twice per spring/summer. Our line of houses was situated on the tree line so when their grass was tall snakes and mice would come into their yard. So yeah, I mowed a good 6 feet into their lawn where our property lines touched in hopes of keeping the critters at bay.

 

It's hard to tell from the OP whether this one section of the lawn just appeared a bit overgrown compared to the rest of her lawn due to Johnson's grass growing on that side of the house (I'm not familiar with Johnson's grass so IDK) or whether their yard is in general not maintained.

We mow about once a week. The johnson grass grows right next to the house. We have sprayed it and pulled it out but it comes back.

[Halftime Hope]

Yes, we are definitely getting a fence, most likely a 6' one. We had a 4' fence previously, but when it started falling apart the neighbor put his chain link fence right next to it, butted up against it. If we replace our fence in the same place our other one was it may cause grass to grow up in the small space between the two fences where it would be difficult to get to. We wouldn't see it but they would.

 

I am not trying to make more work or trouble for him, honestly. I just want a fence. If we leave enough space between the two fences for him to get his riding mower through it will really cut into our side yard and look weird. Wwyd?

 

I would put that fence as close to your property line as you can, and not worry about the weeds on his side.  He can spray right along the baseline with 20% horticultural vinegar if he wants them dead. Or if he's mad about it, you can offer to do the job once a year. 

 

In any case it is your legal right to put your fence anywhere on your property.    You will need to be able to dig the post holes deep enough to sink the posts and cement them so you don't have to do it again (ever) and that may require digging a bit from his side of his fence.  If he doesn't want to let you do that, you can tell him it will involve a wider swath of weeds (6 - 12" from his fence) that he will have to keep tabs on, as opposed to a narrow strip that he or you can spray dead.

 

If you put the fence well inside your property line, you might as well be giving him part of your yard.

 

Thank goodness our neighbors are pretty reasonable.  (I am going to have to trim my one neighbor's tree and photinia that are hanging over into our yard--sigh.  I really wish they would do it so I don't have to.)   I've worked really hard to keep up good graces with them, even helping them with more than our fair share of the shared fence work, but it's worth it to have them cut us some slack.

[Tap]

Yes, we are definitely getting a fence, most likely a 6' one. We had a 4' fence previously, but when it started falling apart the neighbor put his chain link fence right next to it, butted up against it. If we replace our fence in the same place our other one was it may cause grass to grow up in the small space between the two fences where it would be difficult to get to. We wouldn't see it but they would.

 

I am not trying to make more work or trouble for him, honestly. I just want a fence. If we leave enough space between the two fences for him to get his riding mower through it will really cut into our side yard and look weird. Wwyd?

Look at the laws for your area on where to place a fence according to property lines.  Put it where it belongs.  If that is 6 inches from his, so be it.  He can move his fence or put down a weed barrier if he wants to.  A yearly spritz of Roundup and some bark mulch over the top, usually takes care of the distance between.  Once your fence is up, he may be able to remove his all together.

[Mandylubug]

DH leaves for work at 1pm daily and doesn't get home till midnight. He typically works doubles at least 3 days a week as well. So, lawn care falls on my shoulders typically. Naturally, homeschooling has priority for me in addition to housework. So, there have been times when I look outside and seeing my neighbor mowing our "ditch" area near our mailbox and front of the yard. I thanked him one day (they treat our kids like their own grandkids) and he mentioned that he didn't mind, knew my hands were full and thought I could get a couple more days out before having to cut my lawn if he tidied it up right there. He was right, it did take away the noticeable spots from the road. Not to mention, he is selling his home and I am sure he doesn't want our lawn to look bad to potential buyers.. It honestly embarrasses me when I haven't been able to take care of it myself but I know he does it from a good place as well.

[Melissa in Australia]

Put the fence right on the porperty line. The law here is that both neighbours have to pay exactly half of the fence cost. it is the neighbour's problem with what to do with weeds on his side of the fence.

[plansrme]

Do you have a survey showing your old fence? I ask because it is typical here to put fences inside your property line. So if his fence butts up against yours, he might be encroaching. I would spring for a survey while you can still reclaim your property and before you put up a new fence. We had one done for $2-300 a year or so ago when we had a run-in with a crazy neighbor.

[PrairieSong]

Do you have a survey showing your old fence? I ask because it is typical here to put fences inside your property line. So if his fence butts up against yours, he might be encroaching. I would spring for a survey while you can still reclaim your property and before you put up a new fence. We had one done for $2-300 a year or so ago when we had a run-in with a crazy neighbor.

A survey is a good idea, but if he is encroaching I am not interested in doing something legally to make him take down or move his fence. Really I just want the privacy.