ChristineW Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 Looking for some advice here. DD really wants Kit. She thinks Santa is going to bring it to her even though we've told her that Santa doesn't spend that much on presents. I'm not opposed to Santa bringing Kit, its just that Santa didn't bring a DS for our son last year and he opted not to spend his birthday money on a refurbished one. I really think that this might be our last year of Santa. DS is turning 7 in a few weeks and is already suspicious. Santa could bring him the big lego train he wants, and the three year old is getting a Snow White doll and picnic set so she wouldn't know the difference [the box is huge and she wants Santa to bring her a princess.] DD turns 6 about a month after Christmas. Grandpa gives the kid either $100 in presents or a $100 dollar bill. We originally were going to have her buy Kit with her birthday money (we'd cover tax and shipping), but now DH thinks grandpa should just get it for her. I disagree. If someone is going to give Kit to our DD, I want it to be us. DH has discussed going to LA and San Diego in January--which would solve everything. Except there is no way we're going to drive 5-7 hours with a 1 month old. What would you do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ebrindam Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 If you *AKA Santa* don't want to buy her Kit and you don't want Grandpa to buy Kit...then it seems like no one is allowed to buy her Kit? Every little girl should have an AG doll (or equivalent) IMO...let her get the doll from Grandpa. My grandparents gave me my Molly doll back in 1986 and they are gone now, but I still remember that amazing Christmas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meriwether Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 I'm not sure I understand. If Grandpa gives her $100, he is giving her whatever she buys with it. If "Santa" gives it to her, she still won't be giving you credit for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amy g. Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 I think your husband's idea sounds great. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ksr5377 Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 I think I'm missing part of the story, what does traveling in January have to do with it? I can understand wanting to be the one who gives a child their most-treasured gift. However, unless this is consistenly a problem where Grandpa is always the one who gives the "good" gift and you never get to, I would just let him do it this year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 You seem to be comparing the Nintendo DS to the AG doll. Was money the only reason you didn't buy the DS? If you have in mind that you won't spend more than X dollars, you should probably stick to that or you may feel bad. If you want to help your dd understand she won't get the AG doll for Christmas, really talk up her birthday. Tell her that she can use her birthday money to get the doll and won't that be a super great birthday gift? What is Grandpa giving money for, Christmas or birthdays? I'm not clear on that. If it's for Christmas, I would use that money to buy the kids what they want and not explain to them the money came from him, or does he make sure the kids know? If it's for birthdays, then it probably is up to the kids on how to spend it. If your dd really wants that doll, she may buy it. If she doesn't, then she didn't want it bad enough. We didn't stop doing santa when the kids found out. They just knew the gifts were from us, but it didn't affect how we gave out gifts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 Santa never brings anything expensive either. That said Santa doesn't stop coming just because my kids figured it out. Santa always brings something small and fun. Big presents have always come from real people. Real people who get a written thank you, not a mythical creature who can't be thanked. I'm not sure why Grandpa can't give Kit. If it's not in your budget, let Grandpa do it. If it is in your budget do it yourself and have Grandpa give Kit accessories or Kit's friend. If your dd turns out to be really into the doll you could be set on present ideas for years --we had birthdays and Christmas covered from age 6 to 11 in my house. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristineW Posted November 2, 2012 Author Share Posted November 2, 2012 If you *AKA Santa* don't want to buy her Kit and you don't want Grandpa to buy Kit...then it seems like no one is allowed to buy her Kit? Every little girl should have an AG doll (or equivalent) IMO...let her get the doll from Grandpa. My grandparents gave me my Molly doll back in 1986 and they are gone now, but I still remember that amazing Christmas. No. The problem is that DH thinks that Kit is too much for us to buy but doesn't mind grandpa being the hero. We budget about 150 for Christmas per kid so we can afford to give DD Kit especially since she only wants a few books for Christmas otherwise. Santa typically gets the kids 1 present that they really like, but its never ever been a large percentage much less 2/3 of the budget. I think Santa should go big this year, especially since mommy and daddy are giving the kids a new brother for Christmas--due date is 12/24. DH isn't on board yet. We definitely don't trust MIL with the big present b/c she can't keep track of what goes with each grandkid after she's bought it. The doll is slightly over grandpa's budget so he might balk. He might buy a doll he thinks is better. He's almost as unpredictable as his ex-wife when it comes to gifts. DD could buy it herself with cash from grandpa and some of her allowance. We could also save it for her birthday and give it ourselves--we budget about the same amount as grandpa for birthday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristineW Posted November 2, 2012 Author Share Posted November 2, 2012 I think I'm missing part of the story, what does traveling in January have to do with it? I can understand wanting to be the one who gives a child their most-treasured gift. However, unless this is consistenly a problem where Grandpa is always the one who gives the "good" gift and you never get to, I would just let him do it this year. We'd be near an American girls store if we visited LA in January--which we've done every year since we moved north. Dd could pick out her doll in the store and I could get the 3 year old a bitty twin single doll (that I'd hide for her birthday). DH starts missing west LA weather at the end of the year--he also has significantly less work in January than any other month so we generally visit a theme park for an extended weekend. Without the baby coming, we'd have spent two days in LA and two at Legoland. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 If she really wants Santa to bring it to her, then I'd do that. She could always spend some of that birthday money on accessories at the AG store. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justLisa Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 What's this hero business. It's Christmas. If someone has the money for it and wants to buy it say "thank you for your generosity." I am missing the problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisbeth Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 What's this hero business. It's Christmas. If someone has the money for it and wants to buy it say "thank you for your generosity." I am missing the problem. This. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 I think it's sweet that Grandpa could get the doll for her. If it's more than his budget, since she hasn't asked for much else, could you tell him you'd contribute some of what you've budgeted for her as well? I'd just be really specific and tell him that she wants this particular doll. But if he's likely to be unpredictable and get something different, or balk, I'd just get it for her yourselves. Then you could suggest accessories/clothes for the doll to people for gifts, and your DD could have the fun of choosing some things for the doll herself with her birthday money. I think your DD isn't going to realize that Kit costs 2/3 of what you've budgeted, and if that's what she really wants, I'd get it for her, since it's in your budget. If there is something your son wants that is also pretty big, I'd go for that this year too. I think there's going to be nothing wrong with having "Santa" go big for Christmas this year. (I got a baby sister one year for Christmas, literally; she was born very early Christmas morning. She's been, without a doubt, a pretty amazing Christmas gift.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristineW Posted November 2, 2012 Author Share Posted November 2, 2012 (edited) What's this hero business. It's Christmas. If someone has the money for it and wants to buy it say "thank you for your generosity." I am missing the problem. I'm hormonal, and worried about ruining Christmas by being in the hospital Christmas morning. It's stupid and paranoid, but I want to control what I can. Fundamentally, I know that Christmas will be great for the kids no matter what happens (they are 3, 5, and soon to be 7), but stressing out about a doll is easier than stressing about missing the Christmas play or worrying about DH forgetting to put out the stockings Christmas morning. Gut check says the baby is more likely to come on NYE, but the estimated due date scares me. FIL will be over for dinner next week; I'll ask him to get her the AG doll for Christmas, some robot thing for the boy and I have no idea what for the three year old. If he doesn't want to get the doll then I still have a week of free shipping to order Kit. If he does then I can wait until cyber monday to find some cool accessories and DD can spend her birthday money on another doll or doll clothes when we eventually make it to Los Angeles this winter. Edited November 2, 2012 by ChristineW Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justLisa Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 I'm hormonal, and worried about ruining Christmas by being in the hospital Christmas morning. It's stupid and paranoid, but I want to control what I can. Fundamentally, I know that Christmas will be great for the kids no matter what happens (they are 3, 5, and soon to be 7), but stressing out about a doll is easier than stressing about missing the Christmas play or worrying about DH forgetting to put out the stockings Christmas morning. Gut check says the baby is more likely to come on NYE, but the estimated due date scares me. Then find something else to worry about LOL! Christmas is only ever ruined if you let it. Last year we had a wind storm and a power outage on Christmas morning. Lasted all day. It turned in to the funnest day EVER because we made it that way. A baby is to celebrate. It is not something that could ruin any day. And even if the baby DOES come, dd gets an AG doll. She gets her wish, you get a baby. Doesn't seem like any outcome of the situation is bad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 (edited) What's this hero business. It's Christmas. If someone has the money for it and wants to buy it say "thank you for your generosity." I am missing the problem. :iagree: (Are you sure you're not from Jersey, Lisa?) Edited November 2, 2012 by justamouse Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cajunrose Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 My grandmother gives my DD $100 every Christmas/Birthday. for a couple of years, she spent that money on an AG doll...She has 6 now, I think. She bought them all with HER money and she is quite proud of that fact. SO, my vote is you let Grandpa give her the money and let HER buy the doll. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2squared Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 If you kids are 7, 5, 3, and almost born, you have lots of years of Santa left. Just because some kids figure things out doesn't mean that you stop for everyone. A 6yo isn't going to understand how much each gift costs. To her, the most expensive gift will either be the biggest box or the one she likes the most. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy to monkeys Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 I don't think it matters who gets it for her. You just want her to be happy, right? So buy it for her for Christmas if you want, but if you're not comfortable with it, let grampa buy it. I've never had the budget for one. . .but dd got one for her b-day from Gramma last year, and bought a 2nd one this year with her own money after her birthday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dmmetler Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 If she gets Kit for Christmas, she can still take the doll with her to the store, maybe have tea at the cafe/bistro (I'm not sure which LA has), and have a good time. Either way, if you have a $150 budget and she wants Kit, it seems more than reasonable for her to get Kit, even though you didn't do the DS last year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StephanieZ Posted November 2, 2012 Share Posted November 2, 2012 I've always let the grandparents have the thrill of buying special presents if they choose. As parents, we get lots of special connections with our kids! If being the giver of a special gift is meaningful to the grandparent, surely let them do it! (FWIW, I let my MIL, who I don't really like, and who doesn't really like me, buy my oldest her AG.) Now, I do agree that SANTA should always bring little children dramatic, special gifts. I have always made sure that Santa brings the best gifts compared to dh and I. (Dh and I give the more boring, useful presents like new ski pants or the sewing kit, whereas Santa gives the COOL stuff like the skis or the messy/loud/electronic stuff!) One year when he was about 7, ds's friend told him there was no Santa, but that the parents bought the gifts. Ds was outraged, and told his friend that, "No way! My parents could never afford all that stuff! Plus, they would NEVER give me a bow and arrow!" :lol::lol: He used those twin arguments for many years. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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