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If you were a teacher in a co-op and you were teaching a PreK class in which the students have to be potty trained in order to be in that class, would you feel obligated to help a particular dc get their pants\underwear down, get up on the potty, wipe them and then help them pull their pants\underwear back up? (the potties are low so there is no REAL reason this child couldn't get on the potty themselves) Or would you feel justified in getting said child's parent out of her class and having her deal with it?

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If you were a teacher in a co-op and you were teaching a PreK class in which the students have to be potty trained in order to be in that class, would you feel obligated to help a particular dc get their pants\underwear down, get up on the potty, wipe them and then help them pull their pants\underwear back up? (the potties are low so there is no REAL reason this child couldn't get on the potty themselves) Or would you feel justified in getting said child's parent out of her class and having her deal with it?

 

'Potty trained' to me means they child can *do* all those things (wipe, dress, undress, etc). Some people might think, however, that 'potty trained' for the class means they aren't still wetting their underpants.

 

Either way, there's NO WAY I'd help someone else's kid potty, unless it was a very close friend's child that I knew EXTREMELY well. Even then, I'd probably go get my friend to help thier own child, if I could. I know I'm super over paranoid about it, but I know *I* teach my children that no one but Mommy, Daddy, and the doctor should look at/touch their private parts, and I'd hate to make someone else, or their child, uncomfortable in that regard by just trying to help, iykwim.

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I worked with that age group for some time in Awana, and the rule was that they had to be able to do everything themselves. We were not even supposed to go in with them, but to wait outside the stall or bathroom. It was part of that group's child protection policy.

 

The reality was of course that they sometimes need help with their outfit, but we were still supposed to avoid even that and only do it if it was in a public area or another adult was present. No further than that, and if there was an accident or some other problem, we were to call the parents or at least have two adults present while it was dealt with.

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I would absolutely get the parent.

 

I have one who was late in learning to fully take care of his needs; he could go to the restroom, but wanted help in wiping and such. I would NEVER have expected anyone to do that for him, and in fact would prefer, strongly, that anyone outside our immediate family come and get me or my dh to deal with that.

 

Strongly. As in, if a well meaning teacher ever tried to help him with this, I would bluntly ask her to never do so again and please call me to assist him. Help with a tricky, hard to undo snap or something so he can get his pants down -- that I can see. Wiping, getting dressed after, etc. No.

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I would get the parent. We were in that position at one time, because my son had a serious illness (not contagious) that required complete cleanliness in that area, and very good hand washing. I never expected anyone to do that for him, and I always went in to help him. Low potties are so nice. I wish we had those at home when the kids were little!

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In our co-op, the mom scheduled to be in the pre-k room helps the kids in the bathroom if they need it. They usually do not want help, but pre-ks are not always great at wiping #2 and sometimes will call for help. We also will help pull up pants if they get wound around.

 

Our co-op is smallish, 16 families, and we are a very close-knit group, i.e. everyone knows each other well.

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'Potty trained' to me means they child can *do* all those things (wipe, dress, undress, etc). Some people might think, however, that 'potty trained' for the class means they aren't still wetting their underpants.

 

Either way, there's NO WAY I'd help someone else's kid potty, unless it was a very close friend's child that I knew EXTREMELY well. Even then, I'd probably go get my friend to help thier own child, if I could. I know I'm super over paranoid about it, but I know *I* teach my children that no one but Mommy, Daddy, and the doctor should look at/touch their private parts, and I'd hate to make someone else, or their child, uncomfortable in that regard by just trying to help, iykwim.

 

:iagree:

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Well, I'm glad that I'm not being too "hard" according to most of you. I sometimes can be a bit rigid when it comes to being put into a position I feel is way above and beyond so it's nice to hear I wouldn't be alone.

 

As far as safety we leave the woman's restroom door propped open and it is completely view-able from one of the classrooms, but today when I had to step into the stall to put the dc on the potty all my alarms went off in my head. When she said she couldn't wipe I flagged someone down to go get her mom. I don't have a problem untwisting knickers or buttoning\unbuttoning something but that's going to have to be the extent of it.

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Yikes. I've been involved in several different co-ops and have usually been in the nursery or pre-K area when I'm not teaching due to having kids that age myself.

 

I've helped numerous kids with pottying , if they asked for help. Granted some were early potty learners and definitely in need of help, which is not the OP's scenario. But I've definitely helped kids in the 4-5 range too, again only if asked or it was obvious they needed the help. It just seemed to come with the territory & I never would have dreamed that parents would be upset about it.

 

Now I know. I guess next time we're involved in a co-op I'll be sure to ask how things work in this area. Seems sad, but also completely understandable.

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I would want a parent helper in the class to deal with issues like this. The parent helper could go to the bathroom with anyone needing to go, so you wouldn't need to stop what you are doing with the class. Helper could also go and get any parents that need to help their children.

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It is typical fi a child to be posy trained but unable to fully deal with number two unil they are four or five. Kids also have problems with clothes. My DD always wears dresses, she has trouble pullig her tighs back up. I have wiped many a bum as a dance teacher, I wouldn't think twice. I was also a babysitter from th time I was 10....I have been involved in the petty training stage with many kids that are not my own. I would be fine if the teacher came to get me, but I know her teachers and would be fine if tey did not. There are always at least 2 in the room and the bathroom is connected.

 

I get the feeling that none of the moms have a problem, no parent has been pulled so far.

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I would want a parent helper in the class to deal with issues like this. The parent helper could go to the bathroom with anyone needing to go, so you wouldn't need to stop what you are doing with the class. Helper could also go and get any parents that need to help their children.

:iagree: Buttoning, unzipping is totally different than wiping.....I would be uncomfortable.

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I would want a parent helper in the class to deal with issues like this. The parent helper could go to the bathroom with anyone needing to go, so you wouldn't need to stop what you are doing with the class. Helper could also go and get any parents that need to help their children.

 

 

I have a helper but this was at the very end of class and she was cleaning paintbrushes and her hands were covered in paint. This little dc started squealing that she had to go...NOW. You know how they wait until they physically can. not. hold. it. any longer? If it had been during class then yes, the helper would have dealt with it. She doesn't seem the type that would want to be doing the whole wiping thing either. She and I will have to come up with a plan for this particular dc. There are 10 in this class...thank goodness the rest seem to be more self sufficient in this area. :001_smile:

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Years ago, when I was a teen working part-time in a childcare center, one of the other girls I was working with helped a little boy in the bathroom (as we were supposed to). This was a 3 year old. The parents felt something inappropriate had happened and CPS was called in. The girl was cleared, but that incident always stuck with me. I wouldn't really feel comfortable working with young children because of that experience and if I was in the position you are, I would either get the mom or make sure I had someone else there with me. A lot of organizations have a "2 deep" rule now not only for the protection of the child, but to protect the teacher, caregiver as well.

 

So, another vote for getting the parent.

 

Lisa

Edited by LisaTheresa
Rethought my response
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