Homeschooling with a chronic illness (mental or physical).

[Sue G in PA]

I know there are many of you here on the board that suffer daily with some sort of chronic illness...and yet you still manage to homeschool. I've prayed for many of you and have hesitated to post about my own "chronic" illness b/c it just seems so "trivial" in comparison. Many of you know I've suffered with depression for many, many years (in reality I've lived over 25 of my 39 years with this disease). I have come to terms with it in the sense that it will always be a part of my daily life. Some days are good. Some days are bad and some days are impossible. I believe I suffer from a form of bi-polar (as do all my other siblings and my father :(). I've taken medication for depression for years now. Most will work for a while and then lose their effectiveness. Some have side effects worse than the disease itself. I'm not on meds anymore. I needed to cleanse my body of all the chemicals just to "remember" what I was like without them. Does that make sense? What I am finding: My "mania", as I suspected, manifests itself in extreme irritability/rage, short temper, frustration, anger, etc. My depressions can become very dark. I have a lot on my plate besides dealing with this (I've been reminded of this by several people). My children are not easy to teach. Out of my 7, I think I have 3 that are compliant and don't give me much "flak" about schoolwork. My 14yo dd has become impossible to deal with. Her tantrums and meltdowns are daily now. She isn't getting anything done as far as I can see. My 10yo continues to be difficult and my 8yo's reading difficulties and fatalistic personality drive me to tears. If you've read this far, God bless you. There is a question here. HOW do you homeschool your children without feeling like you are doing them a disservice? I called my pastor's wife (a good friend) to "vent" about my daughter's meltdown and my 10yo's defiance. She immediately told me to put them all in school asap and just admit defeat (in a nutshell). :confused: In no other area of life do people just tell you to "give up" after a few rough days! But with homeschooling, it seems to be the default..."just put them in school and focus on yourself". I don't want to be stubborn. I pray about this every day but I still feel "called" to homeschool! Public school is not a good fit for dd14 and I don't want to "label" my 10yo and 8yo as "behind". How do you do it? We use HOD...very simple (except I have to teach 3 different guides...but that isn't too difficult once you work out the schedule). My pastor's wife made me feel like I was ruining my kids by keeping them here. The atmosphere around my home is TENSE most days...how can it not be? My house is not spotless. In fact it gets to looking like a PIT by Friday! My dh travels a LOT! Am I just being stubborn? Am I just afraid to admit that I can't do this or shouldn't do this? Or? I just need some perspective. Non-homeschoolers tell me to "just put them in school" like that is an easy/quick fix that will solve all my problems. Homeschoolers tell me to cut back or just do the basics...but I feel like I'm failing them. Any advice, comments, constructive criticism, hugs, prayers, etc. are welcome. Thanks for listening.

[WeeBeaks]

:grouphug: I have suffered depression in the past - that is not trivial at all.

 

Currently I have debilitating migraines. What I do is workboxes or a written schedule. Then, if DH or someone has to help me, the kids know what to do and when to do it. I can grade it later when I'm feeling better. With the boxes and schedule, my oldest (9yo) can do a lot on his own. I purposely have chosen to have my core subjects be more self-directed so they won't get behind when I'm ill.

 

When I absolutely have to be resting, we do read-alouds in my bed. Not terrible. Even even worse situations, I do educational videos.

 

You say your older ones are having tantrums and your family has a history of bipolar? Have you had that child checked already for those symptoms?

[Sue G in PA]

Tanya, 10yo ds is on medication for "mood disorder - nos"...psychs hesitate to Dx bi-polar in children under a certain age. Dd14 is just being, well, 14! She is melting down over algebra, writing, etc. Anything that causes her to use her brain more than normal, if you ask me.

[JulieH]

:grouphug::grouphug:

 

I have rapid cycling bipolar and am also struggling. I want you to know that you are not alone. On my bad days, I do the barebones minimum. I find that once I get going on something, I tend to move on to another. We are doing sonlight very "loosely" and are enjoying the books.

 

In my home, PRAISE GOD for Brain Pop!!! My kids love those videos and they are very educational.

 

I agree with the pp re: bipolar..has your 14yodd been evaluated? or your son?

 

Lots of people think I'm crazy for hs'ing and have tried to get me to put them in school. I am committed year by year.

[Jyniffrec]

Hi Sue. I am so sorry for all you are going through. :grouphug:

 

A couple thoughts came to mind. Is there anyway to get the message to your dd14 that students aren't to treat their teacher this way? I am thinking if the possibility of one online course that has live sessions where she has to interact with the instructor. It maybe even an online school? At the very least it would be another person that she is accountable to.

 

We have a similar situation in our house with one of our dc. It isn't easy. I hope you find a solution that works for everyone.

[TravelingChris]

Okay, I don;t have mental illness but do have physical chronic illnesses (by the way, I don't really think there is a difference, anyway, I think the so called mental illnesses are just brain or hormonal illnesses). So just understand that my issues are different.

 

I have an autoimmune disease (Sjogren's), associated arthritis, asthma, and a blood clotting disorder (I clot too much and get DVTs, etc). The main effect is has had in my life as a homeschooler is that I can't do athletic activities to the degree other moms can, I also get sick much more frequently, and I am not one for doing detailed handwork. Regardless, my kids have been on sports teams and done lots of gym. They all developed artistic or crafty talents. They also learned to be more independent at a younger age because they needed to be when I would have pneumonia or a broken leg.

 

Now, to your situation. I agree with the other posters that maybe you should have the 14 yo evaluated. I think that because of your illness you may think that rages over math are normal. They really aren't. This is speaking as one who has two children diagnosed with various mental problems. It may not be bi-polar. For my dd, it turned out to be PMDD and easily cured with one medication that gives her no side effects. But she does need the medication or she has severe anxieties and episodes of rage. I am familar with both major depression and bipolar since some members of my family suffer or have suffered from each. I have to say that I think unmedicated major depression or Bipolar are both incompatible with homeschooling since they are both incompatible with most normal activities. I will pray that you find the help you need. I do think that either of those problems is much more disabling than any of my phyiscal issues and really, in truth, more disabling than probably most any physical issue.

[SweetMissMagnolia]

no it's not at all trivial.....I have several health issues--one being diabetes (depression too) and it can cause problems---some days I just feel like crud....on those days we do easier stuff or crafty stuff or take more breaks....whatever we need to do.....

[annandatje]

I know there are many of you here on the board that suffer daily with some sort of chronic illness...and yet you still manage to homeschool. I've prayed for many of you and have hesitated to post about my own "chronic" illness b/c it just seems so "trivial" in comparison. Many of you know I've suffered with depression for many, many years (in reality I've lived over 25 of my 39 years with this disease). I have come to terms with it in the sense that it will always be a part of my daily life. Some days are good. Some days are bad and some days are impossible. I believe I suffer from a form of bi-polar (as do all my other siblings and my father :(). I've taken medication for depression for years now. Most will work for a while and then lose their effectiveness. Some have side effects worse than the disease itself. I'm not on meds anymore. I needed to cleanse my body of all the chemicals just to "remember" what I was like without them. Does that make sense? What I am finding: My "mania", as I suspected, manifests itself in extreme irritability/rage, short temper, frustration, anger, etc. My depressions can become very dark. I have a lot on my plate besides dealing with this (I've been reminded of this by several people). My children are not easy to teach. Out of my 7, I think I have 3 that are compliant and don't give me much "flak" about schoolwork. My 14yo dd has become impossible to deal with. Her tantrums and meltdowns are daily now. She isn't getting anything done as far as I can see. My 10yo continues to be difficult and my 8yo's reading difficulties and fatalistic personality drive me to tears. If you've read this far, God bless you. There is a question here. HOW do you homeschool your children without feeling like you are doing them a disservice? I called my pastor's wife (a good friend) to "vent" about my daughter's meltdown and my 10yo's defiance. She immediately told me to put them all in school asap and just admit defeat (in a nutshell). :confused: In no other area of life do people just tell you to "give up" after a few rough days! But with homeschooling, it seems to be the default..."just put them in school and focus on yourself". I don't want to be stubborn. I pray about this every day but I still feel "called" to homeschool! Public school is not a good fit for dd14 and I don't want to "label" my 10yo and 8yo as "behind". How do you do it? We use HOD...very simple (except I have to teach 3 different guides...but that isn't too difficult once you work out the schedule). My pastor's wife made me feel like I was ruining my kids by keeping them here. The atmosphere around my home is TENSE most days...how can it not be? My house is not spotless. In fact it gets to looking like a PIT by Friday! My dh travels a LOT! Am I just being stubborn? Am I just afraid to admit that I can't do this or shouldn't do this? Or? I just need some perspective. Non-homeschoolers tell me to "just put them in school" like that is an easy/quick fix that will solve all my problems. Homeschoolers tell me to cut back or just do the basics...but I feel like I'm failing them. Any advice, comments, constructive criticism, hugs, prayers, etc. are welcome. Thanks for listening.

 

The pastor's wife was probably forming mental image of your situation based upon what you were telling her. Her image may or may not have been accurate. The pastor's wife probably thought that your situation was much more strained than merely a "few bad days." You know far more about your situation than she does. Then again maybe she sees some things with an outsider's eye that you do not.

 

How is it "defeat" for you to put your children in regular school if, after soul searching assessment, that is what is best for them? In my opinion, "defeat" would be continuing a pattern that is not effective for the mother or the children.

 

If you only wanted reassurance from her or others that everything would be ok, make it clear upfront that you are seeking encouragement for continuing homeschooling. Otherwise, people naturally think that you truly are asking their opinion on how to solve your problem.

 

Only you know how your children are progressing. You are in Pennsylvania. Although I do not know what their hsing laws are, I do recall that they are one of strictest for hsing. Are you meeting required minimum per state law? Would they be performing at grade level according to state standards?

 

Are your children progressing to your satisfaction? Do you have a schedule of material to be covered daily, weekly, monthly? Have you mostly met your educational goals?

 

If you break out your "good days, bad days, and impossible days" , what does homeschool look like on the bad and impossible days and what percent of days fall under the bad and impossible categories? Frankly I do not believe that "just doing the basics" cuts it as a long term solution.

 

Do you function well enough mentally to hold down a regular paying job? If not, traditional schooling may indeed be what is most appropriate for your situation. Only you know the answer to your question.

 

You have a child who is having daily meltdowns. You currently are no medicated. Hopefully both of you will seek treatment and counseling and arrive at an educational decision that is best for all of you. The decision about your children's educational future needs to be made after an honest objective assessment that does not rely too heavily upon religious or sociopolitical ideologies. Remember this is your children's future.

 

Even though dark depression is not organically contagious, it permeates the atmosphere of the home. I would be surprised if spouse and children can remain optimistic in face of it. I recommend a Martin Seligman book titled Learned Optimism that may help you develop healthier thinking patterns. There is also a version for children aptly titled The Optimistic Child.

[kwg]

Do you/did you take meds for the bipolar as well as the depression? If not, that could be why they lose effectiveness :grouphug:

[KidsHappen]

If you are indeed bi-polar you need a mood stablizer and perhaps additional meds other than anti-depressants. Getting yourself balanced and stablized is key to being able to homeschool especially if you are dealing with children who also may be bi-polar, hormonal or just plain difficult. And I am not going to lie to you getting to balanced and stable can take a long time. It takes quite awhile to find the right meds and dosages and then time for them to start working optimally. If one or more of your children also have BPD then it will also take time for them as well and if they start seeking treatment after you then that would extend the time it would take to have the whole household funtioning smoothly.

 

Sending them to school is not easier. My youngest two go to school now but there is no way I could have handled the stress that comes with PS before I was properly medicated. Sending them to school is actually more difficult than homeschooling them. Finally, I myself am finding it hard to funtion at full capacity now without the structure I used to have while schooling them. I still have much to do but I find it much harder to be disiplined about doing it when I don't have the pressing need for it to be done at a certain time. I would strongly suggest starting with a psychiatrist and discussing the possibility of bi-polar and trying some of the more successful meds for it. :grouphug:

[Sandra in FL]

Has any doctor ever checked you for the genetic mutation MTHFR? If you have it, the treatment is natural - high doses of l-methylfolate (like folic acid). It's sold under the prescription name Deplin for depression or you can buy it OTC.

 

http://www.deplin.com/

[Starr]

I think I would check back in with your doctor about your meds. Your self cleansing may not be the best for your overall health. :grouphug: Work on getting your own health stabilized and the rest will come more easily. Prayers for you and your family.

[Mommy22alyns]

:grouphug: Sue. I remember we've talked a little before. I deal with depression too, and it's been most of my life as well. I am on a lot of medications, and that makes things mostly manageable. I'm also very lucky with my girls. How are you being treated by your doctor right now? Mine is pretty proactive in changing up my meds.

[Jean in Newcastle]

If you are indeed bi-polar you need a mood stablizer and perhaps additional meds other than anti-depressants. Getting yourself balanced and stablized is key to being able to homeschool especially if you are dealing with children who also may be bi-polar, hormonal or just plain difficult. And I am not going to lie to you getting to balanced and stable can take a long time. It takes quite awhile to find the right meds and dosages and then time for them to start working optimally. If one or more of your children also have BPD then it will also take time for them as well and if they start seeking treatment after you then that would extend the time it would take to have the whole household funtioning smoothly.

 

Sending them to school is not easier. My youngest two go to school now but there is no way I could have handled the stress that comes with PS before I was properly medicated. Sending them to school is actually more difficult than homeschooling them. Finally, I myself am finding it hard to funtion at full capacity now without the structure I used to have while schooling them. I still have much to do but I find it much harder to be disiplined about doing it when I don't have the pressing need for it to be done at a certain time. I would strongly suggest starting with a psychiatrist and discussing the possibility of bi-polar and trying some of the more successful meds for it. :grouphug:

 

:iagree: Listen to the wise woman! You need to get your oxygen mask on first.

[Impish]

:iagree: Listen to the wise woman! You need to get your oxygen mask on first.

:iagree:

For me, there's no secret to dealing with RSD and hsing.

 

Simply put, I'm stubborn as all h*ll. RSD has robbed me of so freaking much...I *refuse* to allow it to rob me or my family any more...unless or until it gets to the point where I'm incapacitated more than not, that I can't white knuckle it through until Wolf gets home from work, I'll continue to hs.

 

Some days, all I can do is sit on the couch and blearily focus on a read aloud, have the Littles bring me their workbooks so I can read instructions, and count down til quiet time.

 

If their education starts to suffer b/c of my health, then yes, I'll put them in ps. Until then, I keep on keeping on.

[eight_gregorys]

I've wanted to post something similar for the last few days. Please don't think that depression is trivial...its is very REAL and very debilitating. I honestly wouldn't have said those words a few years before I had my first bout of depression. I would have normally said that people just need to "suck it up and deal", and then I was slammed with depression on top of several chronic illnesses (lupus, fibromyalgia, autoimmune hypothyroidism, & migraines). I didn't get out of bed...I didn't leave the house....I lost interest in EVERYTHING. It was one of the horrible things I have ever experienced. I truly feel for you....it is a tough thing to deal with.

 

It seems like this year has been really tough for a lot of people. I know when I get stressed....I get sick....I "flare". We moved in March across the country. My DH lost his job right after we moved, but was able to find another significantly higher paying position (praise Jesus) within 2 weeks. It just seems like since we moved, it has been tons of little things. My four boys (ages 9, 8, 8, & 7) have been particularly testy and frustrating. I feel like every day is a constant battle with them. We joined a charter school when we moved that allows us to choose our own curriculum (as long as its secular) and we have meetings with our very laid back Educational Specialist once a month. In return, we get an $8000 stipend to spend each year. Even though we have been able to order all sorts of awesome things....from games to awesome science, history, and art kits.....the boys have been so rebellious, its been hard to get anything done and I feel like I'm drowning in work and we're always behind. Not to mention I thought this semester would be a good time for me to finish the last year of my bachelors. I feel like I'm losing my mind.

 

I hope that you find the right combination of medications/support that will give some relief. Being a mama is tough work and you don't usually see immediate results with all the hard work you do. I think this totally contributes to the depression cycle and makes it worse. Keep your chin up! :)

Edited October 15, 2011 by eight_gregorys

[Sue G in PA]

My med cleanse was only so that I/my psych could see where my functionality/mood was OFF meds...meds that were not working anymore anyway. I still had bouts of dark depression. I am under dr's care AND regularly (weekly sometimes more) see a therapist. I am very proactive about my condition. I do NOT just blindly follow the advice of a dr. w/out researching myself (I'm stubborn that way). And my faith plays a crucial role in my healing. I have an Rx in hand for Lamictal...a med that I asked my last psych to prescribe to no avail. She refused to diagnose me with bi-polar or even entertain the possibility that I could even be suffering from something other than clinical depression. :glare: My new psych prescribed Lamictal right away! I took the Rx and have been researching side effects, benefits, etc. And I have been praying about resuming meds or not. I have to do what is best for my family...not just me. My husband is very supportive (any other man would have left me years ago bc of this stupid disease). But I can't live like this anymore (up sometimes, down sometimes, raging sometimes). You see, I lived like this growing up! I walked on eggshells around my father as did the rest of our family and I internalized all of the junk that went along with it. My therapist tells me that living with that is much like living with an addict or an alcoholic. I don't want that for my kids. Not.at.all. Thanks for the advice everyone. Someone asked about PA and if the kids were working at grade level or progressing, etc. Most of my kids are. My 10yo has special needs and while he works at grade level in MOST subjects, writing continues to be our challenge. My 8yo is much the same way except it is reading for him. He is having a rough time with it but is progressing. And then I have a very precocious and advanced 6yo who works at least 2 grade levels ahead in ALL subjects. I just love how God gave me 7 completely unique children. :D:lol: It would have been too easy to make them all alike. 2 of my children function independent from me (my dd14, ds11) while I have to stay on top of ds13 and completely guide the rest of the kids. I just loved SWB's audios about the different levels of assistance our children need from us. Imp, I am like you..stubborn. I REFUSE to let this disease rob me and my children from what I and my husband feel is the best educational choice for them.

[Sue G in PA]

Being a mama is tough work and you don't usually see immediate results with all the hard work you do. I think this totally contributes to the depression cycle and makes it worse. Keep your chin up! :)

 

Andrea, this is so true and something I struggle with every.day. I'm sorry that you have had to deal with this beast called depression, too. It is real and can be devastating. :grouphug:

[TracyR]

I have thyroid disease and I can honestly say sending your kids to school does not make your life easier. One of my many reason for sending my girls to school last year was in a last ditch hope to focus on myself to get to feeling better. Well that never happened like I wished it did. What I did find was I had kids who came home with homework that needed for me to reteach, were moody. Got sick way more than what I wanted them to from being exposed to all those germs at school. Getting up early is very difficult for me to begin with because I don't sleep well, due to inflammed sinuses , do to my thyroid issues not being properly taken care of.

 

So in reality I'm still trying to work to get myself better the best way I can and homeschool my oldest and youngest at the moment. I am really thinking of just bringing my middle two home because its been very difficult having two at school and two at home. But I've definitely learned that sending them to school doesn't make your life easier.

 

As far as the depression goes, there is a strong link to bipolar and thyroid disease. Have you had your thyroid tested?

http://thyroid.about.com/b/2005/06/16/bipolar-disorder-linked-to-thyroid-disease.htm (reputable information)

[Mommy22alyns]

My med cleanse was only so that I/my psych could see where my functionality/mood was OFF meds...meds that were not working anymore anyway. I still had bouts of dark depression. I am under dr's care AND regularly (weekly sometimes more) see a therapist. I am very proactive about my condition. I do NOT just blindly follow the advice of a dr. w/out researching myself (I'm stubborn that way). And my faith plays a crucial role in my healing. I have an Rx in hand for Lamictal...a med that I asked my last psych to prescribe to no avail. She refused to diagnose me with bi-polar or even entertain the possibility that I could even be suffering from something other than clinical depression. :glare: My new psych prescribed Lamictal right away! I took the Rx and have been researching side effects, benefits, etc. And I have been praying about resuming meds or not. I have to do what is best for my family...not just me. My husband is very supportive (any other man would have left me years ago bc of this stupid disease). But I can't live like this anymore (up sometimes, down sometimes, raging sometimes). You see, I lived like this growing up! I walked on eggshells around my father as did the rest of our family and I internalized all of the junk that went along with it. My therapist tells me that living with that is much like living with an addict or an alcoholic. I don't want that for my kids. Not.at.all. Thanks for the advice everyone. Someone asked about PA and if the kids were working at grade level or progressing, etc. Most of my kids are. My 10yo has special needs and while he works at grade level in MOST subjects, writing continues to be our challenge. My 8yo is much the same way except it is reading for him. He is having a rough time with it but is progressing. And then I have a very precocious and advanced 6yo who works at least 2 grade levels ahead in ALL subjects. I just love how God gave me 7 completely unique children. :D:lol: It would have been too easy to make them all alike. 2 of my children function independent from me (my dd14, ds11) while I have to stay on top of ds13 and completely guide the rest of the kids. I just loved SWB's audios about the different levels of assistance our children need from us. Imp, I am like you..stubborn. I REFUSE to let this disease rob me and my children from what I and my husband feel is the best educational choice for them.

 

 

I relate so much to a lot of what you wrote. I think our DHs must be saints! I just got put back on Lamictal too; I hope it works well. :grouphug:

[eight_gregorys]

This is so TRUE! We did the same thing a few years ago and had the exact same result. Public school was a nightmare for us.....and I ended up picking every little sniffle they brought home as well. You would think it would have taken at least a little stress off, but honestly it was really more stressful. Plus, I missed the time I didn't get to spend with them and the time I did spend with felt like constant frustration and just not happy times.

 

I have thyroid disease and I can honestly say sending your kids to school does not make your life easier. One of my many reason for sending my girls to school last year was in a last ditch hope to focus on myself to get to feeling better. Well that never happened like I wished it did. What I did find was I had kids who came home with homework that needed for me to reteach, were moody. Got sick way more than what I wanted them to from being exposed to all those germs at school. Getting up early is very difficult for me to begin with because I don't sleep well, due to inflammed sinuses , do to my thyroid issues not being properly taken care of.

 

So in reality I'm still trying to work to get myself better the best way I can and homeschool my oldest and youngest at the moment. I am really thinking of just bringing my middle two home because its been very difficult having two at school and two at home. But I've definitely learned that sending them to school doesn't make your life easier.

 

As far as the depression goes, there is a strong link to bipolar and thyroid disease. Have you had your thyroid tested?

http://thyroid.about.com/b/2005/06/16/bipolar-disorder-linked-to-thyroid-disease.htm (reputable information)

[KidsHappen]

My med cleanse was only so that I/my psych could see where my functionality/mood was OFF meds...meds that were not working anymore anyway. I still had bouts of dark depression. I am under dr's care AND regularly (weekly sometimes more) see a therapist. I am very proactive about my condition. I do NOT just blindly follow the advice of a dr. w/out researching myself (I'm stubborn that way). And my faith plays a crucial role in my healing. I have an Rx in hand for Lamictal...a med that I asked my last psych to prescribe to no avail. She refused to diagnose me with bi-polar or even entertain the possibility that I could even be suffering from something other than clinical depression. :glare: My new psych prescribed Lamictal right away! I took the Rx and have been researching side effects, benefits, etc. And I have been praying about resuming meds or not. I have to do what is best for my family...not just me. My husband is very supportive (any other man would have left me years ago bc of this stupid disease). But I can't live like this anymore (up sometimes, down sometimes, raging sometimes). You see, I lived like this growing up! I walked on eggshells around my father as did the rest of our family and I internalized all of the junk that went along with it. My therapist tells me that living with that is much like living with an addict or an alcoholic. I don't want that for my kids. Not.at.all. Thanks for the advice everyone. Someone asked about PA and if the kids were working at grade level or progressing, etc. Most of my kids are. My 10yo has special needs and while he works at grade level in MOST subjects, writing continues to be our challenge. My 8yo is much the same way except it is reading for him. He is having a rough time with it but is progressing. And then I have a very precocious and advanced 6yo who works at least 2 grade levels ahead in ALL subjects. I just love how God gave me 7 completely unique children. :D:lol: It would have been too easy to make them all alike. 2 of my children function independent from me (my dd14, ds11) while I have to stay on top of ds13 and completely guide the rest of the kids. I just loved SWB's audios about the different levels of assistance our children need from us. Imp, I am like you..stubborn. I REFUSE to let this disease rob me and my children from what I and my husband feel is the best educational choice for them.

 

Lamictal is one of the meds that I take and it is particularly effective for the depressive side of bi-polar. The only thing is that some people have an allergic reaction to it so you have to start with a very low dosage and tirate very slowly meaning it can take quiet a long time to reach an effective dosage. But if it turns out that you are not allergic to it (very rare 2-3%) then the side effect profile is very good and it is a good med. I have been taking it for a long time now and it works great. I have few depressive episodes and when I do have them they are much eassier to manage than the manic ones. Most of the bi-polars I know take Lamictal and usually at least one other med. I am glad you have found someone that will listen to you and work with you. That is critically important when trying to fiure out the best meds for you.

[sewingmama]

I suffer from depression and auto-immune something or others (still in process of diagnoses).

 

Honestly my depression would be worse if I didn't homeschool because it gives me a reason to get up and a reason to clean the house and something else to think about then myself all the time. If I sent the kids to school I would come home and then do what -mope around an empty house and surf the internet all day.

 

Because I homeschool I know my kids futures are depending on me so it forces me to get on with it and also to get out of the house for field trips and park trips etc.

 

The biggest help I find is to have a solid routine - otherwise I tend to just push everything to another time "when I feel better". Unfortunately I feel like cr*p every day so I tell myself this is as good as I'm gonna get so make the most of it.

 

:grouphug:

[Kim in Appalachia]

:grouphug:

 

Mental illness is not trivial. Homeschooling 7 kids is hard.

 

What does your dh think about you homeschooling? Or about the kids in school? Maybe you could send some of the kids to ps and keep the 3 home? Or you could find material that was independent or outsourced, like k12 or some online classes.

 

Your kids may need a break from the home. I say this knowing what a home with a bi-polar parent can be like. The kids may thrive in ps. But that would be something I would want to discuss with them. Especially any that were 7th grade or up. What do they think? What do they want? I'm not saying it should be completely up to the kids, but when things at home are hard it affects them and they should have a say in how to make things work.

 

I'm not telling you I think you should give up and just send them to school. I'm saying that you may need to evaluate each child and what's best for him/her. In the end this will help you too. When we homeschool we put everything on ourselves, but it involves the kids, and as they get older we should be working with them. You and your dh could have an honest discussion with each child, who is old enough, about what it's like being home, what that child's own concerns and goals are, and what that child would like.

 

You do need to get you taken care of, but you know that and you're working on that. It doesn't matter that the house is a pit by Friday, and it doesn't matter that you keep it simple and cover the basics. But schooling kids as they get older can involve more and you may need to seek outside help in providing it.

 

:grouphug:

[Sue G in PA]

Yes! WHat many of you said:

1. public school was a nightmare when I sent my 3 oldest back 2 years ago.

2. I am NOT a morning person and honestly the early ams would KILL me (this is not being lazy...you have to be a non-morning person to understand).

3. The homework fights were akin to the homeschool fights but they came at a time of day when I was already WIPED OUT!

4. I will still be homeschooling my littles even if I DID send the olders back! AND doing both is something I promised myself I would NEVER do again.

5. Homeschooling gives me a reason to get up in the am. Without it, I don't know that I would some days.

6. I honestly love being around my kids most days. Even with the attitudes and the fights.

 

There is more, but it is so comforting to know I am not alone. My pastor's wife had me thinking I was insane FOR homeschooling and that I was going to ruin my kids. I think I just have to have a "plan" written down for my depressive days. Something anyone could follow..even the 14yo. Educational DVD, narration based on DVD, read-aloud, art projects led by d14, baking, ed apps on the iPod, etc. Thanks everyone.

[Chris in VA]

:grouphug:

 

Just wanted to give you a hug.

 

I don't doubt you are very proactive, and you certainly, in combo with your professionals, know your diagnosis. I did want to comment that my very severe major depression manifested in rage, irritability, frustration and anger. As an example, I remember telling my then-preschool/toddler boys to leave my master bedroom; I shut the door, and held on to the molding of the bathroom door, and shook it shook it shook it as hard as I could, to vent some of the pain. :tongue_smilie: Just one incident of many.

 

It wasn't, in my case, the mania side of bi-polar. So, it is possible to be depressed and not "look depressed" as much as people think.

 

Tons of :grouphug:.