I want to quit...

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

I'm so uncertain that I can teach high school. My son seems bored out of his mind each time I try to work with him. My daughter craves social interaction.

 

On friday, we went to visit a local high school (which is grade 7 to 11 over here). DD would enter grade 7 next september, and it's a perfect time to have her do the entrance exam. She was impressed by the open house, and so was I. This is my former high school. I know what to expect, I know how it works, and I have no doubt it would educate my daughter well. And it will teach her to write way more than I can! They would teach her more than I can teach her at home.

 

 

But the other part of me doesn't want to!!! I like having them at home, and interacting with them. I like not having to deal with outside decisions, I like being on a personal time table for each kid.

 

I know my post is not the first one here talking about this, but right now I don't know what to do!!

[kristinannie]

I would make a pros and cons list. List the reasons why you homeschool and list the reasons why high school would work well for your DC. There are other options as well. They can take some classes at the community college or join a co-op or online class for a subject you don't feel like you want to teach. You might also look into whether or not they can enroll for certain classes. I would pray about it (if you are a praying type). I think that God will lead you where you are supposed to go. Of course, I am a long way from making that type of decision!!! :D

[WishboneDawn]

It sounds like you can't go wrong - both choices are good ones. I'd probably let my kids' opinions rule the day.

[Julie in MN]

Before you decide, I would make an impromptu visit to the school. Open houses are not going to give you a picture of an actual day at that school. If possible, stand in the hallways between classes. See all the kids, not just the chosen few who talk about their school at events. If possible, talk to kids about their writing assignments, or at least view a syllabus. The school may not be the same as you remember from your own years there. Or, maybe it is.

 

Julie

[creekland]

If the school is decent academically and your kids have no problems being there socially (not being bullied - no pressure to use drugs, etc), I see no reason why school couldn't be an option... but yes, it will mean a whole different schedule in life than homeschooling.

 

Both when I pulled mine from school and when youngest went back we let our guys know if things weren't working for them, they could switch.

 

There seriously are pros and cons to each situation. You enjoy the pros and work to overcome the cons.

 

Either way, you can still enjoy your kids. ;)

[Sunshine State Sue]

I'm so uncertain that I can teach high school.

I can relate. I am not confident in my abilities to teach anything but math in high school. What are the other options for your son? Is CC a possibility? Is graduating early a possibility? I know he's a bright boy.

 

Does your dd have to enter this school in 7th grade? Here, 7th and 8th seem to be the worst years of teen hormonal craziness. However, our schools also stink. So, if you are comfortable with the school and your dd wants to go... OTOH, the writing issue can be outsourced.

 

Helpful, aren't I? ;)

 

:grouphug:

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

There are no other options. There are no CC classes here. There's a little bit of a co-op but it doesn't handle academics, it's just for the extras (drama, music,PE..) which is great in itself. And yes she has to enter in 7th grade. High school here goes from 7th to 11th.

 

I know the school is still great. My old professors were still there, well, some of them. The school is still considered one of the best in the province. It's girls only, the nuns are still very involved, they live there!

 

Mind you, I'm not certain my daughter will be accepted. She's not my academic kid. Plus she was educated through the French system and not the Quebec one. The differences are big. I have no time to prep her as the exam is next weekend.

[WishboneDawn]

There are no other options. There are no CC classes here. There's a little bit of a co-op but it doesn't handle academics, it's just for the extras (drama, music,PE..) which is great in itself. And yes she has to enter in 7th grade. High school here goes from 7th to 11th.

 

I know the school is still great. My old professors were still there, well, some of them. The school is still considered one of the best in the province. It's girls only, the nuns are still very involved, they live there!

 

Mind you, I'm not certain my daughter will be accepted. She's not my academic kid. Plus she was educated through the French system and not the Quebec one. The differences are big. I have no time to prep her as the exam is next weekend.

 

If you're daughter is interested, let the exam decide?

 

Personally, I'm loving the grade 8 stuff my daughter is doing and looking forward to high school.

 

ETA: I've always maintained that if a Jesuit school opened up anywhere nearby the kids would be going in a heart beat. I have a serious love for those dudes.:D

Edited September 25, 2011 by WishboneDawn

[regentrude]

If you are happy with the school, why don't you let her take the exam and see what the outcome is?

I do not know for what reasons you homeschool , but I would happily send my very social, interaction craving daughter to a great high school where she would be academically challenged.

Good luck with your decision.

[Amy in TX]

If the school is decent academically and your kids have no problems being there socially (not being bullied - no pressure to use drugs, etc), I see no reason why school couldn't be an option... but yes, it will mean a whole different schedule in life than homeschooling.

 

Both when I pulled mine from school and when youngest went back we let our guys know if things weren't working for them, they could switch.

 

There seriously are pros and cons to each situation. You enjoy the pros and work to overcome the cons.

 

Either way, you can still enjoy your kids. ;)

 

:iagree:

 

Your reasons for considering school are good ones. IF (big IF) your school is good, I'd consider it. If you don't end up putting them in school this year, I would make sure your interaction-craving child has plenty of outside activity. This is more crucial for some kids than others, and for those with a big need for it, they will not do well at home without it (ask me how I know ;)).

 

Take care,

[Rebecca VA]

I put my daughter in school this year, after researching carefully to find the very best possibility for her socially and academically. We found a school that met every "wish" on our list -- and beyond. It was absolutely the right thing to do. She's radiantly happy and thriving. She's having a bit of challenge with time management (since she's also taking Latin 3 online in addition to her regular schoolwork), but dealing with pressure is healthy for her. I wish I'd put her in years ago.

[Laura Corin]

It's really hard. As you know, we put both boys into school and, for us, it's been an enormous success. I do miss them but I've found new areas of my life that had been put on hold while they were at home.

 

Laura

[Teachin'Mine]

As Dawn and Regentrude have said, why not let her take the exam and then see if it's even an option. I know a week isn't much for prep, but if you dropped everything else, you could do a lot in a week to at least familiarize her with the format of the exam and work on some areas that are lacking. She may do much better than you think.

 

Even if she is accepted, you still have the option whether to send her or to homeschool. If she doesn't take the exam, you won't have the option. :)

 

I'm not qualified to teach in all areas, but we found what seems to be working for us. Dd wanted very structured schooling; she wanted a lesson plan to follow each day and know exactly what was required. So we enrolled her with Seton. It's a lot of work, but she's been doing very well with it and enjoying most of her classes. She also has teachers she can call for help when it's needed. I'm really just the facilitator and researcher - that's how I justify all my time on here. :blushing: But honestly, without this forum and other web searching, I would never have known about all the options and opportunities available. What's outside the curricula there will be covered by cc.

 

You have time to decide. Also, while it may not be possible to go from homeschooling into higher high school grades there, it is possible to go from school back to homeschooling.

[Sunshine State Sue]

My son seems bored out of his mind each time I try to work with him.

So, what are his options? Will he be bored out of his mind there?

[Chez J]

What about getting other homeschooled girls together at your house or someone else's house and taking online courses together? You could get electronics to put it on the TV so all could see. Just an idea.

 

My 7th grade dd is in a part-time academy because she needed that social interaction as well. It is a perfect solution for us - so long as the kids continue each year. She gets her needs met two days a week and is home with me where I can work with her individually as well. You could set up the same environment doing the idea above.

[regentrude]

My son seems bored out of his mind each time I try to work with him.

 

This does not have to be a reflection on your homeschooling at all.

My son is an introvert and an I-prefer-to-figure-this-out-by-myself-so-get-off-my-back-and-let-me-do-my-thing kind of guy.

Even when I am home, he prefers to work in his room. He loves presenting his findings, giving oral presentations with powerpoint about the stuff he learned in history or science, writing reports. But until he is "done" with a topic, he likes to be in his own bubble and work on it.

So, it may be more of a personality and learning style issue - and may not have anything do to with homeschooling. (and public school would not be a good option for such a student)

 

And every time I think of some cool hands-on-project we could do together, my kids groan and ask whether they could not just read about it in a book :)

[justamouse]

First, you have to do what's right for YOU. If that is putting him in school, then do it and don't feel guilty.

 

Second, it's [homeschooling highschool] freaking hard work, and you have to know that.

 

Third, putting them in school won't solve problems that homeschooling magnifies. He MAY be bored there. You may have to step up his work to challenge him-this is exactly what I'm having to do with my 6th grader. And now I'm doubling up on MY learning (yes, I did this before, but I still need refresher courses and he's a different kid with different strengths) because he's just going through stuff much faster than I expected him to.

 

Fourth, you may have to reasses WHY you're homeschooling. There are times when I really get frustrated and think we COULD swing parochial school but then I remember WHY I'm doing this, and even with going to parochial school, it will not give them the education and life I want for them.

[8filltheheart]

I'm so uncertain that I can teach high school. My son seems bored out of his mind each time I try to work with him. My daughter craves social interaction.

 

On friday, we went to visit a local high school (which is grade 7 to 11 over here). DD would enter grade 7 next september, and it's a perfect time to have her do the entrance exam. She was impressed by the open house, and so was I. This is my former high school. I know what to expect, I know how it works, and I have no doubt it would educate my daughter well. And it will teach her to write way more than I can! They would teach her more than I can teach her at home.

 

 

But the other part of me doesn't want to!!! I like having them at home, and interacting with them. I like not having to deal with outside decisions, I like being on a personal time table for each kid.

 

I know my post is not the first one here talking about this, but right now I don't know what to do!!

 

 

Why did you begin homeschooling in the first place? Are those reasons still vaild issues? If so, why? If not, have other significant issues developed over the yrs? What is the better of the 2 options for the needs of each individual child?

 

Only you can answer those questions.

 

I can share the biggest concerns that have arisen w/in our family. My kids are not "grade-level" kids. They would not fit into a standard school curriculum well b/c of the range of their skills. I prefer to be able to target each child's needs w/in each individual subject.

 

As far as boredom, my kids have a huge amt of influence in what is studied and how. How actively involved are your kids in the decisions regarding their education? I try to build their studies in a way which emphasizes their interests and strengths so that I can use those to build upon in order to strengthen their weaknesses.

 

For example, ds is a slow reader. We just made the decision to drop the enrolled AP cal BC class ds was in b/c for a math class it had an inordinate amt of reading and the time spent was not worth the value gained. He doesn't need to spend 90 mins reading math. He can learn math far more efficiently on his own. It was a waste of his time. However, he does need to increase his speed in reading b/c it will impact him if he doesn't progress. But, he can read the college level astronomy book for those 90 mins and be interested, learn what he wants to study, and still complete AP cal BC following a different route. In a school, he wouldn't have that option and his love of math would have turned into simple toleration this yr.

 

I personally do not believe we need to be an expert in everything in order for our kids to succeed. I may not know the material, but I can find resources that enable them to learn it. For some subjects, it is outsourcing. But, there are lots of other resources available to aid in helping our kids succeed as well.

 

But as to whether or not homeschooling vs. going to school is the best decision for your family......no one can make that decision other than your family.

[Nan in Mass]

Cleo - I would let your daughter sit for the exams. Cross one bridge at a time. It may turn out not even to be a choice. Or if she doesn't pass this year, it might be an important motivator for the future? "Work hard and perhaps you will pass next time." I think your other option is to let her do some other activity (dance, gymnastics, theatre, ...) very intensively and make homeschooling be a super efficient way of getting academics out of the way. There comes a time in some children's lives when they need a bigger world than home. Some children thrive on interaction with people outside the family. And some really need home to be a haven away from the pressures of getting an education. I believe both school and home have their advantages. One of the major disadvantages of school, for you, is that you don't get to spend that time with your children and the whole family is tied down to a school schedule. (We are dealing with a school schedule this year and my husband and I are finding that we hate it. We absolutely hate it. There is nothing to be done, though. My son is definately at the point where he needs to transition to community college math and science. But anyway...) For your daughter - what are the advantages to homeschooling for her, just to her, not to the family? If there aren't really any, then I think there, perhaps, lies your answer.

 

Your son may be a more difficult proposition. Like regentrude said in her post, my son also does not like to work with me. He fights me. But he doesn't necessarily do a good job when I leave him alone. I try to minimize my part of working with him and put it all in together first thing in the school day so he can go off and work by himself the rest of the day. We are lucky to have a community college that is ok in math and science. It probably isn't as good as the local public school, but that is not an option for us, so this is the best I can do. If we did not have that, I would look for something online, K12 perhaps, for science and we would muddle through the math as best we could. An online class would not be my first choice, though. He is in 11th grade this year. By now, of course, he doesn't really match up with his peers level-wise, so the community college is a good choice. It has a wide range of classes from below him to above him and he can pick them individually rather than being tied to one level for them all. All of that is just to say that I don't have any answers for you when it comes to your son, but I suspect I have a good idea of what your days with him are like, and I suspect that at some point, you are going to outsource the areas where his strengths lie. He might no like school no matter where he goes, in which case you just have to find a form of school which he will tolerate and which he will work hard at. That might not be you, or it might turn out that you are his best option. It is very hard to tell when they are that age. Is he perhaps at that point where he has to begin working harder academically but he doesn't want to? "I'm bored" can mean "this is hard and I don't want to work hard" or it can mean "this is not hard enough". (French has the right idea combining bored and bothersome into the same word grin.) It is very hard to tell which is which at that age.

 

All the lovely homeschooling togetherness will eventually come to an end. Choosing when is very difficult.

 

Hugs

Nan

[tylertaylin]

I think you should trust yourself! I think you know what is best for your kids!

 

All the best!

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

All the lovely homeschooling togetherness will eventually come to an end. Choosing when is very difficult.

 

 

That's exactly what's bothering me! It's my dream that's ending. Not just the kids being at home, but my dream job too. It's letting go that's hard.

 

My daughter will do the exam, but even if she doesn't pass, it won't be a matter of working harder. She's working through a different school system, where things are learned in a completely different order. She's not learning what the kids here are learning. I have no idea how much overlap will be on the exam.

 

As for my son, if he goes to school, he *will* be bored, that's for sure. But it would only be for 2 years till he gets his diploma. It's not that bad. It's survivable. At least he's retained his curiosity, and it hasn't been beaten out of him by 11 years of compulsory schooling.

[Nan in Mass]

Hugs, Cleo. It is heartbreaking, having them grow up. I try to comfort myself that it would be more heartbreaking if they didn't (we have one with DS in the clan) but that still is scant comfort. It hurts so much that it makes it hard to breathe sometimes, that my older ones are gone and my younger one going and I no longer have little ones to drag around with me and brighten my days. Mostly, you just have to look ahead and not think about it. There is a mourning process that you have to go through, and for homeschoolers, it is huge. What can you look ahead to when your children are in school? Will you have to go back to work? I chose a new "career" (quotes because it is almost guarenteed not to make money - if I am lucky it will pay for my paper) that I am excited about. I am finding that getting time even to be able to keep house a bit better is a relief. I will probably go directly from child care to elder care, so I will have company, and it will be very nice not to be torn between the two generations the way some of my friends are. I am finding that it is very nice to be able to focus on my husband a bit more, and have time to spend with the dog and cat. And it is a huge, huge relief not to be trying to keep up in science any more. The math, with a bit of application, I could manage, but I don't have the statistics to help my son design proper experiments at the level at which he wants to do them, and we don't have the equipment, and I had to pass him over to my mother for his new interest in chemistry and his physics questions are getting beyond all of us and my father has to deal with his electronics questions. I could, with a lot of work, take him through a textbook, but I wouldn't be doing justice to the subject and it would be in isolation, if you see what I mean. I'm babbling. Sigh. I guess that just shows but I guess that shows my relief. It is wonderful seeing him work hard for somebody else. And I know from his brothers that mine need a transition between homeschooling or high school and college. It isn't all bad. Honestly.

 

I'm not at all trying to talk you into making the transition now. I'm just trying to sympathize with the necessity of making the transition now or eventually and tell you that once you get through the worst of the mourning, it isn't all bad.

 

Hugs,

Nan

[AHASRADA]

Oh Cleo, I feel for you. I agree with the posters who said to make a pros and cons list. Imagine 2 scenarios: "If the kids go to school, they will..., but they won't..." and the same for staying home. Really try to imagine their lives, academically, socially, and free-time in both situations, and compare them. I would also weigh the items since they will not all be equal.

 

Definitely have her take the exam to keep her options open. I know a week isn't much, but you should buy the exam prep. workbook (I've seen them at Renaud-Bray and sometimes Maxi), go through it and go over any topics you think she may be weak in, and spend the week on that.

 

I know what you mean about the social aspect, although she seems to have quite a few outlets. Didn't she have a taste of some "negative socialization" at gym? I would seriously consider how much of that she is likely to encounter at school, and weigh that against the positives.

 

As for ds, if he's bored when you teach him, won't school be worse? He won't "fit the mould" academically or socially, which he will have to deal with at some point. You have to decide if there are any benefits to school for him sooner (HS) rather than later (univ.) (a HS diploma, OK, academically, I doubt it, socially, hmm...)

 

Also, consider how much of your angst is related to your starting to work full-time. It must be overwhelming trying to schedule HSing around work, and you might feel they are missing out (especially dd) since you don't have as much one-on-one time to give her. Take that into account on your pro/con list, and see if you can come up with any solutions other than school (there may or may not be some).

 

I know you gave up a lucrative career in order to be home with your kids, and you may be feeling it was all for naught if they end up needing to go to school in the end anyway. Be confident that, no matter when they go to school, they would not have the academic foundation nor be the people they have become if not for the sacrifices you made for them and the time you devoted to them. I highly doubt they would be as fluent in English as they are if they had gone to school; that alone is a major accomplishment.

 

Take a deep breath, prepare dd for the exam, weigh the cost/benefit analysis as objectively as you can, and do what's right for each of your dc.

 

:grouphug:

[Colleen in NS]

But the other part of me doesn't want to!!! I like having them at home, and interacting with them. I like not having to deal with outside decisions, I like being on a personal time table for each kid.

 

I know my post is not the first one here talking about this, but right now I don't know what to do!!

 

You could move here and we could help each other with our science boys and artsy girls. I am only half kidding!

[Starr]

The pain, I feel your pain!

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

We went to see A Dolphin's Tale yesterday. And it dawned on me that one of the reasons I want to send my kids to school is that they haven't found a passion. I tried hard to give them opportunities to find and develop a passion. I didn't succeed. Maybe school will have other opportunities to offer. I'm pouring my heart into this homeschooling venture and DS doesn't care and looks at me like I'm a monster. It's time I become only mom, and let someone else take the blame for the work.

DD is different, she has too many passions, and will happily skip on school work to work on her passions. I have tried to accomodate her as much as I could, but I have a feeling it's backfiring. Her mind is always wondering all over the place, and never concentrating on any one thing.

 

Had my kids been passionate about something specific, I would have backed them completely. I still wish I could homeschool them through high school. I'd love to see this project to its natural end.

[Nan in Mass]

13-15 was the worst age for my boys. If you persist through that, they stop looking at you as though you were dangerously ignorant and clueless. At least most of the time. Getting through that stage is hard, though. Don't worry. It isn't you. It is very dispiriting to be putting so much time and energy into something so under appreciated at the time, though, isn't it? Sort of like doing the dishes. I'm not sure there is much you can do about it except make sure they have plenty of scarily adult non-academic things to do and decide whether you can tolerate the scorn and apathy without losing your tempter and becoming immature in return and doing irrepairable damage to your relationship. It is altogether too easy to feel that you aren't getting to them by behaving in an adult way and deciding that they can only be reached by behaving like a 13yo yourself. Ug.

Good luck with your decision-making,

Nan

[Teachin'Mine]

I agree with Nan - 13 is a very tough age. It gets better. :grouphug:

[Colleen in NS]

I'm pouring my heart into this homeschooling venture and DS doesn't care and looks at me like I'm a monster. ...I have tried to accomodate her as much as I could, but I have a feeling it's backfiring.

 

:grouphug: Take your time in deciding.

 

13-15 was the worst age for my boys. If you persist through that, they stop looking at you as though you were dangerously ignorant and clueless. At least most of the time. Getting through that stage is hard, though. Don't worry. It isn't you. It is very dispiriting to be putting so much time and energy into something so under appreciated at the time, though, isn't it? Sort of like doing the dishes. I'm not sure there is much you can do about it except make sure they have plenty of scarily adult non-academic things to do and decide whether you can tolerate the scorn and apathy without losing your tempter and becoming immature in return and doing irrepairable damage to your relationship. It is altogether too easy to feel that you aren't getting to them by behaving in an adult way and deciding that they can only be reached by behaving like a 13yo yourself. Ug.

Good luck with your decision-making,

Nan

 

Thanks for saying all this.

[Beth in SW WA]

Hi, Cleo. You've got big decisions. Thankfully you have many folks who love you & can offer a wealth of insight and experience.

 

Let me know here (or via FB or G+) if you want to chat. You know which route I took. My kids found their passion and are thriving in private high school. I know it isn't for everyone -- but a wonderful fit here.

[Abbeygirlsouth]

:iagree:

 

Your reasons for considering school are good ones. IF (big IF) your school is good, I'd consider it. If you don't end up putting them in school this year, I would make sure your interaction-craving child has plenty of outside activity. This is more crucial for some kids than others, and for those with a big need for it, they will not do well at home without it (ask me how I know ;)).

 

Take care,

 

:iagree:

[Rebecca VA]

Hi, Cleo -- I just want to add a little more to what I said about my daughter. Being at school is really, really good for her. She is getting a far more accurate assessment of her abilities by being around other children (all of whom are achievers -- not necessarily all gifted, but who show up for school bright and early each morning and earn A's while juggling demanding outside commitments). She's realizing that her school teachers expect much more out of her than I did, and they take a dim view of late or rushed-through work. She listens to her peers earnestly discuss their hopes of getting into the local math and science academies, and she has come to realize -- to her shame -- that the preparation she didn't do back in homeschool has made her ineligible for those very competitive schools.

 

This is so much of a better situation than when she was at home fighting with me over schoolwork. She realizes now that I'm on her side. Her enemies are lack of time and her wish to do as little work as possible. Our relationship has improved tremendously now that I've stepped aside.

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

Argh. And today we had a great co-op day. The type that makes me believe in homeschooling all the more.

 

I think I'll be on a roller coaster all through this year. Sigh.

 

The coop day sure made my kids say they didn't want to go to school next year. :lol: (n'est-ce pas AHASRADA??)

[YLVD]

I put my daughter in school this year, after researching carefully to find the very best possibility for her socially and academically. We found a school that met every "wish" on our list -- and beyond. It was absolutely the right thing to do. She's radiantly happy and thriving. She's having a bit of challenge with time management (since she's also taking Latin 3 online in addition to her regular schoolwork), but dealing with pressure is healthy for her. I wish I'd put her in years ago.

 

:iagree:

 

I also found the perfect school for my DD. It has been amazing so far and she tells me daily how much she loves it. I'm very happy in our decision.

[cathmom]

Hi, Cleo -- I just want to add a little more to what I said about my daughter. Being at school is really, really good for her. She is getting a far more accurate assessment of her abilities by being around other children (all of whom are achievers -- not necessarily all gifted, but who show up for school bright and early each morning and earn A's while juggling demanding outside commitments). She's realizing that her school teachers expect much more out of her than I did, and they take a dim view of late or rushed-through work. She listens to her peers earnestly discuss their hopes of getting into the local math and science academies, and she has come to realize -- to her shame -- that the preparation she didn't do back in homeschool has made her ineligible for those very competitive schools.

 

This is so much of a better situation than when she was at home fighting with me over schoolwork. She realizes now that I'm on her side. Her enemies are lack of time and her wish to do as little work as possible. Our relationship has improved tremendously now that I've stepped aside.

 

I can so see this happening with my daughters if I send them to school, which I am seriously considering. It's one thing to have a crying fit over math at home where only Mom can hear you, but you're not going to do it at school. You're most likely going to work harder to get better. Maybe it's better if some things are more public.

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

DD is passing her high school entrance exam tomorrow morning. And now I don't want her to go! :cry:

 

Oh what to do? what to do?

[Sunshine State Sue]

DD is passing her high school entrance exam tomorrow morning. And now I don't want her to go! :cry:

 

Oh what to do? what to do?

:grouphug: Must it be now or never?

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

:grouphug: Must it be now or never?

 

Yes. And it might already be too late. We are underground homeschoolers, and if the private school she's applying to send her file to the public system, we're screwed. I don't think they will, but they may. And you get in in grade 7, or forget it.

It would be different for public school, in which case it's grade 10. But there's no way I'm sending them to public school

[Aquinas Academy]

:grouphug:Cleo:grouphug:

[creekland]

Yes. And it might already be too late. We are underground homeschoolers, and if the private school she's applying to send her file to the public system, we're screwed. I don't think they will, but they may. And you get in in grade 7, or forget it.

It would be different for public school, in which case it's grade 10. But there's no way I'm sending them to public school

 

:grouphug:

[Teachin'Mine]

:grouphug: Cleo I'm praying that it's kept private from the public schools. FWIW I think you'd be able to teach high school beautifully. You still have time to decide. Couldn't you decline when you're daughter's accepted with a simple no as we're planning to move out of the area or something like that? I can't imagine that they'd pass the info onto the public school.

[Nan in Mass]

Hugs and hugs and more hugs.

Eventually we have to let them go. They go on their own acrimoniously if we don't, and those family ties are damaged in a more permanant way.

Sometimes it is better to let them go sooner, before they make it happen for themselves.

Sometimes the most loving thing to do is to nudge them out of the nest and then hover over them to make sure they are ok and they know you still love them.

Sometimes the most loving thing to do is to acknowledge that somebody else will do a better job than you can under the circumstances and allow or encourage them to go.

Sometimes you look at circumstances and decide that now is not the right time, that it will do them no harm and even possibly do them good to stay in the family longer.

Deciding which is which is heartwrenchingly awful.

I have done all of them. They were all right at various times (except when the child left himself sigh). I hated the decisions.

 

Sometimes you will only know whether a decision is right after you make it, especially complex decisions involving one's heart. This is very hard for an engineer to admit, but one's brain is very sophisticated and sometimes it communicates decisions and observations via one's emotions. This particular decision is only reverable one way; in other words, you can choose to send her and then pull her back home again, but you can't choose not to send her and then send her later. If you absolutely cannot decide what is right, perhaps you should decide to send her and then see what happens. If after doing that you become convinced that it is the wrong decision, then you can pull her back. You have to disentangle your own wishes from your wishes for her, your own need for family closeness from the nebulous feeling that this is not the right decision for her. But most homeschooling mothers have had a ton of practice doing this sigh.

 

Anyway, something to consider. The computer programmer in me likes to have things laid out as if-then statements GRIN. Forgive the lecturing tone.

 

Hopefully you can decide before having to commit her to a course of action and then be at peace with that decision, even if it grieves or worries you.

 

I think we all need crystal balls so we can see the results of each course of action and choose correctly.

 

Lots of hugs from someone who has been there. Please don't think I am urging you to send her. I sent one of mine and it turned out to be the wrong decision. (I should have found a third option.) I am well aware of why that might have been the right decision under slightly different circumstances, though.

 

Nan

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

Exam done. She was finished rather early too. She, my slow poke girl, came out of there in the second group, 90 minutes before the end. And she says it went well, but we shall see tonight. That school sends the results online the very same evening. (password protected, individualized pages...) Right now, I don't know what I wish for.

[Teachin'Mine]

Exam done. She was finished rather early too. She, my slow poke girl, came out of there in the second group, 90 minutes before the end. And she says it went well, but we shall see tonight. That school sends the results online the very same evening. (password protected, individualized pages...) Right now, I don't know what I wish for.

 

Wow - the College Boards here in the States could learn from them.

 

I'm sure she passed with flying colors, but I still think that that will just give you the option of sending her and not make it a done deal. :grouphug:

[Laura Corin]

It can be so hard.

 

Laura

[Nan in Mass]

How nice that you don't have to wait forever! Best wishes for a good result, whatever that may be. Please let us know! And lots of hugs.

Nan

[AHASRADA]

:grouphug:

 

I can totally understand your feeling torn. It's too bad that you have to be in this decision crunch at this point in her education. She has several years left and the choice might be easier to make at another point down the road. But, it is what it is.

 

At least you have several months left to make the decision, assuming the exam results are positive, right? Even if she is accepted and registered, you could always change your mind at the last minute, I would think. So, it doesn't have to be decided tonight ;). I hope she didn't race through the exam with the subconscious attempt to fail, not wanting to go to school. :tongue_smilie: Hopefully she is open to leaving her options open.

 

Still, I know that churning feeling in the pit of your stomach, wondering if you are doing what's best for your dc. Of course, there is no way to know for sure until years later, which doesn't make the decision any easier.

 

Keep us posted. We'll support whatever decision you end up making (well, maybe my dd won't but, that's to be expected ;).)

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

She is officially accepted in the enriched program (aka honours program). No conditions whatsoever.

 

 

At least it means I'm a good teacher ;-)

[Rebecca VA]

Congratulations, Cleo!!!

[Kareni]

Best wishes to your daughter, Cleo, as she undertakes this new challenge. And congratulations to you, too, for preparing her so well.

 

Regards,

Kareni