Katiebug_1976 Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 Ok, this is kind of embarrassing, but I need your help so I don't make a fool of myself! My nephew & his fiance are getting married next month and Dh is performing the ceremony. Dd's & I have been invited to her bridal shower the day before the wedding. I have never been to a bridal shower before so I am clueless!:blushing: I have met her several times, but they do not live close to us so we don't see them very often. She is a very sweet girl that comes from a family that is (how do I say this tactfully...) well off (??) and this will be a formal wedding at a nice resort. So I don't want to go and make a complete fool of myself. Can someone enlighten me as to what is an appropriate bridal gift and what usually happens at bridal showers? I would really appreciate any advice, since it has been a long (15+ years) since I have been to a "traditional" wedding. I'f feeling a little (a lot!!!) nervous, but excited at the same time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 Find out if she is registered with a store/s somewhere. That will give you a range of ideas of what she is looking for/needs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crimson Wife Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 A bridal shower usually has little gifts off the registry and sometimes lingerie gifts (probably don't want to go there with a future in-law). For my SIL's shower, we gave her a muffin tin and a rubber spatula off her registry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 You know, anything for the newlyweds' home would be appropriate. What kinds of things did *you* appreciate when you were a newlywed? Well, there you go. OTOH, if the family is "well off," you'd probably be wise to see where the happy couple has registered, because I'm sure they have. If you find, though, that the places they've registered are way beyond your price range, feel free to buy something nice that you can afford even if it isn't on the list. Make no apologies, either, if you didn't get something off the registry list. Those registrations are just a convenience to help friends know the couples' taste and whatnot; it is NOT mandatory to buy anything on that list. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 Usually showers are for household items. I agree that getting something from the registry is nice. Another option would be to go to Williams-Sonoma and buy some lovely little gadget that catches your eye. WS has so many good ideas, and all their stuff is good quality. Wear a tea-length dress, medium fancy (not over the top. More like a spring/summer dress) if you have one. That's the safest choice. If not, then I think that dressy pants and a flowy or tailored blouse/top would be fine. Smile a lot! Be prepared for really, really stupid party games. Think Tupperware parties in the 1950's. If you're lucky they won't do them, but it's kind of traditional. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 :iagree: Many nice stores will have a computer you can check; they make shopping easy. Find out if she is registered with a store/s somewhere. That will give you a range of ideas of what she is looking for/needs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snickelfritz Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 (edited) Where is the shower? Is it just family with all kids invited? Family with just older girls? Family and friends of the parents? How formal is the invitation? Many people have multiple showers that have different target audiences. Her friends might do a lingerie shower. Co-Ed friends or "invite the whole family" might do a casual BBQ. Family (their parents) friends might be more formal at the country club. The invitation should give you the clues you need. Edited April 26, 2011 by snickelfritz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 It's is totally appropriate to ask if they are registered anywhere. Then pick something off the registry within your price range. If they aren't registered, I'd consider maybe a cookbook with some nice potholders and cooking utensils. Or grill tools with a grilling cookbook. Something along those lines. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katiebug_1976 Posted April 26, 2011 Author Share Posted April 26, 2011 Usually showers are for household items. I agree that getting something from the registry is nice. Another option would be to go to Williams-Sonoma and buy some lovely little gadget that catches your eye. WS has so many good ideas, and all their stuff is good quality. Wear a tea-length dress, medium fancy (not over the top. More like a spring/summer dress) if you have one. That's the safest choice. If not, then I think that dressy pants and a flowy or tailored blouse/top would be fine. Smile a lot! Be prepared for really, really stupid party games. Think Tupperware parties in the 1950's. If you're lucky they won't do them, but it's kind of traditional. :lol: Thank you so much! This helps a lot! Hopefully there wont be tto many goofy little games, but thank you for the heads up. Where is the shower? Is it just family with all kids invited? Family with just older girls? Family and friends of the parents? How formal is the invitation? Many people have multiple showers that have different target audiences. Her friends might do a lingerie shower. Co-Ed friends or "invite the whole family" might do a casual BBQ. Family (their parents) friends might be more formal at the country club. The invitation should give you the clues you need. Dh received an email from the brides mother inviting myself and our kids (Dh & older son will be off golfing w/ the guys) to the shower. We did receive a formal invitation to the wedding, but it was only for the wedding. Most of the other arrangements have been made over the phone or via email between Dh & the groom (our nephew) since Dh will be performing the ceremony. Maybe I should ask Dh to call and talk to nephew to find out more details? How formal, registry, etc? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KatieJ Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 It's easy enough to find out where they are registered without a phone call. Just go online and search the bridal registries of stores they would likely to be registered at. Williams Sonoma, local department stores, Target, Bed Bath Beyond, stores like that. The other plus for searching their registry is you can get a feel for what kind of colors their kitchen will be, dishes, towels, things like that, so you can choose something complementary when buying your gift. As Ellie said, there are no rules you have to buy from the registry. Others have suggested some nice ideas as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JVA Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 It's easy enough to find out where they are registered without a phone call. Just go online and search the bridal registries of stores they would likely to be registered at. Williams Sonoma, local department stores, Target, Bed Bath Beyond, stores like that. The other plus for searching their registry is you can get a feel for what kind of colors their kitchen will be, dishes, towels, things like that, so you can choose something complementary when buying your gift. As Ellie said, there are no rules you have to buy from the registry. Others have suggested some nice ideas as well. :iagree::iagree: THIS. I do this whenever we get a wedding invitation. So easy. They might even have a website for their wedding and you can get info from that, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
My3Monkeys Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 I think it's fun to get one of those recipe binders and then get it started for the couple with a few of your favorite recipes. If your budget is larger, you can add kitchen accessories that you'd need to make one of the recipes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 It's is totally appropriate to ask if they are registered anywhere. Then pick something off the registry within your price range. If they aren't registered, I'd consider maybe a cookbook with some nice potholders and cooking utensils. Or grill tools with a grilling cookbook. Something along those lines. A collection (if you have time) of family recipes from folks would be cool! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlebug42 Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 A gift that we got that we enjoyed was "Breakfast in Bed". It had a tray, pancake mix, sample sizes of different coffees, syrup etc. It was something different to get but still usable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katiebug_1976 Posted April 27, 2011 Author Share Posted April 27, 2011 Thank you all for the advice and gift ideas, they have been really helpful. Please keep the gift ideas coming. Our budget isn't very large, but I would like to get something nice & useable. Unfortunately, with the wedding & shower so close, I do not have time to order anything online (it wouldn't get here before we left) and my shopping locations are kind of limited as we live in a small town. So if you have any ideas of something I could put together from Hobby Lobby, Walmart & a couple dollar stores I would really appreciate it. Thanks so much, ladies... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angela in ohio Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 If you can't match them in price, then go for sentiment. Get a lovely silver frame and engrave it with their names, for example. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momofkhm Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 My cousin got married a few years ago to a girl who grew up where I live so the wedding was here! :001_smile: It also meant that I was invited (with my daughters) to a shower. We got her a "My Favorite Recipes" cookbook and then my girls decided which recipe of ours to put in there. Then I went out and bought all the non-perishable items for the recipe. The chose Tasty Taco Casserole - I bought the beans, chips, green chilis, enchilada sauce and tomato sauce for it, leaving them to by the cheese, sour cream and onions. I may have bought the casserole dish as well. But again, both bride and groom from well off families. BUT they did a great job of registering. They registered at Crate and Barrel, at Bed, Bath and Beyond and at Macy's. There were things on the registry in all price ranges. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 Thank you all for the advice and gift ideas, they have been really helpful. Please keep the gift ideas coming. Our budget isn't very large, but I would like to get something nice & useable. Unfortunately, with the wedding & shower so close, I do not have time to order anything online (it wouldn't get here before we left) and my shopping locations are kind of limited as we live in a small town. So if you have any ideas of something I could put together from Hobby Lobby, Walmart & a couple dollar stores I would really appreciate it. Thanks so much, ladies... You know, something I'm really glad I have but would not have bought for myself is a Belgian waffle iron. I have no idea whether they are expensive or not, though. A friend of the family who is a caterer gave it to us as a wedding gift, and included a set of 4 little tiny pitchers for individual syrup. (By tiny, I mean maybe 3 tablespoons in size). So cute! Some other things I came to appreciate later on that would make good shower presents are: Tortilla press A set of basic cookie cutters Biscuit cutters (pair with a good cookie sheet, maybe, and a family recipe or two? This also would work with the cookie cutters.) Electric griddle--pancakes and tortillas do not burn on this. It's nonstick, too. Silpat bakeware A Martha Stewart cookbook Unusual measuring spoons or cups--2T, 1 1/2 T, 1/8 cup, 2/3 cup, 3/4 cup A pizza stone and/or peel Seasonal dishtowels Butter crock Salt pot Pepper mill Oil and Vinegar combo for the table If you are feeling crafty, you could weave potholders for every season--pastels for spring, red, white and pink for valentines' day, red and green for Christmas, red white and blue for summer, orange greens and brown for Thanksgiving. Trifle dish--Pampered chef has a great one The key is to personalize it a bit. So include a recipe or a little something 'extra' no matter what you pick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherry in OH Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 A cake decorating set is nice to have. Get a small set of tips, extra coupler rings, and disposable decorator bags. If you want to spend more add cake pans, muffin tins, or other bakeware. A basket of locally produced jams, salsa, or honey. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnTheBrink Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 I agree with checking to see if they're registered, but frankly, I find buying off a registry to be a bit...boring. Yeah, I know, it's about helping the new couple start out in life. But who says it has to be dull? Not me! So, my suggestion is to get whatever you can afford from the registry and then have some fun with it. For example, on one bridal registry, the bride had registered for about 40 clothes hangers and a laundry basket. So, I got her the basket and all the hangers, but then I wrapped each hanger individually with tissue paper in her wedding colors (which were bright--Gerber daisies were her theme). It was a hoot! Has she registered for some mixing bowls? Fill them with baking mixes or popcorn or some gourmet snacks. Bath towels? Put some pretty, fancy home made soaps in the box with them. Candle holders? Include a gift card to Yankee or some other candle store. Also, if they're registered for things you can't afford, maybe get them something not on the registry that they can use with the expensive item. Like, if they're registered for a fancy dvd player or home sound system, maybe a gift basket of a large popcorn bowl, popcorn seasonings, oil, "theatre" candy (you can get those at Walgreens), gc for Best Buy for movies or something. So, you can definitely get what they need or want and it can be fun and creative, too. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 I agree with checking to see if they're registered, but frankly, I find buying off a registry to be a bit...boring. /QUOTE] I thought this, too, until I got married. We spent so much time figuring out what to register for, that when someone gave us something from the registry it felt very personal and special because we really, really wanted it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 How about a small scrapbook welcoming her to the family? A few group photos with names, list any traditions, if there are family recipes, include them alongside a picture of the person who usually cooks it. A couple of cute pictures of hubby-to-be as a boy rounds things off nicely, and if you include a sweet memory or two, all the better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sebastian (a lady) Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 Thank you all for the advice and gift ideas, they have been really helpful. Please keep the gift ideas coming. Our budget isn't very large, but I would like to get something nice & useable. Unfortunately, with the wedding & shower so close, I do not have time to order anything online (it wouldn't get here before we left) and my shopping locations are kind of limited as we live in a small town. So if you have any ideas of something I could put together from Hobby Lobby, Walmart & a couple dollar stores I would really appreciate it. Thanks so much, ladies... Is the couple old enough that they already have established a home? I would get a couple that was young and newly launched different things than a couple who has been out on their own for several years. If they are registered at a store with an online registry, you could probably order online and have it delivered to the bride's home. That might get it there in time for the shower. One gift I enjoyed pulling together was everything needed to make chocolate chip cookies (bowl, stiring spoon, measuring cups/spoons, cookie sheet, spatula and a cookie scoop). If this came along with several family desert recipes, it might be just the thing. Another gift that I once made was a scrapbook with wedding photos of all the couples in the family, scrapbooked with their names and wedding dates. But this partly worked because I already had the photos from doing family history research. But it went together pretty easily once I had the photos printed. I did each page with the same format. The tags with names and dates were typed up and printed out on the computer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newlifemom Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 I always buy a plunger. It is something you need, but generally don't get and have to run out in the middle of the night for. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katiebug_1976 Posted April 28, 2011 Author Share Posted April 28, 2011 Wow, what great ideas! Thanks so much for all your help. I did find where they were registered (not anywhere local to me...grr), but at least it gave me an idea of colors & what they were looking for. Now I just need to pick and choose between all the great ideas what I want to do (this should be hard!). Thanks again for all the wonderful help! You guys are AWESOME!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katiebug_1976 Posted April 28, 2011 Author Share Posted April 28, 2011 I always buy a plunger. It is something you need, but generally don't get and have to run out in the middle of the night for. :D :smilielol5::rofl::rofl: Hysterical, yet practical. I love it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caroline Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 I love fancy bundt cake pans for gifts. I got one as a shower gift from my mom's best friend's mother along with bundt cake recipes. I have since bought some of the fun Williams Sonoma ones. However, I still love the one that I got from Mimi, and use it a lot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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