Rivka Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Okay, picture this setting. Church is over, but you're still hanging out in the nursery chatting with the care provider while your preschooler plays. Someone comes in with her toddler, saying she wants to nurse him down for a nap before the all-church meeting later. You should: A) Consider clearing out to give them some privacy, since it's time for coffee hour anyway. B) Move over so they can sit down and lower your voice a little. C) Stay where the only open seat is between you and the person you're chatting with. When the other mom raises her shirt, start talking loudly about how old is too old for a child to nurse. In a purely theoretical way, of course. I am so freaking annoyed. I don't need anyone to validate my parenting decisions, but I don't appreciate the fact that my kid didn't get his darn nap because someone IN A NURSERY freaked out about seeing a two-year-old nurse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mykdsmomy Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 :cursing: So someone actually started complaining about you nursing your toddler??!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pfamilygal Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 (edited) Did you squirt her in the eye with milk? I might have. I would have loudly started discussing the WHO recommendations of a MININUM of two years of breastfeeding. Or just flat out told her off. Two year olds have ears after all. We had people complaining about moms nursing babies in the nursery. It made dads uncomfortable when they came to pick up their kids apparently. Uh, yeah, it's a NURSEry not a bottlery. Grow up. Or send your wife. Edited April 17, 2011 by pfamilygal Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Gosh, so much in life just boils down to good manners. Sorry you didn't get treated to some today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Is there anywhere else you can nurse in private? I was an extended breastfeeding mother so I do understand your frustration. I'm not the kind of person to push it though. The people who don't understand will likely never understand. I was pushed out of a mom's group for nursing my toddler. I wasn't even directly told. All of a sudden, I was no longer invited and people avoided me. I found out years later that the mom in charge started spreading rumors about me so everyone would avoid me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Yeah, breastmilk in the face might help her remove the log from her eye. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer in MI Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Gosh, so much in life just boils down to good manners. Sorry you didn't get treated to some today. :iagree: Whether they agreed with you or not, this was not the proper setting to voice their opposition!!! Ugh. I'm sorry. I also nursed my kids until they were "at least" two. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rivka Posted April 17, 2011 Author Share Posted April 17, 2011 I went to the Religious Education director's office, but it was right next door to a very noisy RE class, so he couldn't drop off. Afterwards I spoke to her and she swore that she didn't mean us. She was just speaking generally. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 B.) Scoot over, say how cute the kid is :) Whisper for a few to finish up the conversations, and take off... But, since I nursed mine for years, I guess my vote would be obvious. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Oh, forgot to add, I thought this was one of the benefits of UU. That everyone is different and finds their own way; I'd be especially surprised at a UU about this... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2scouts Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 How annoying. If it bothered her that you were nursing your toddler, she could have just left. I was recently at the dance studio where my 4 year old dances. Two of the moms were going on and on about the mother who *gasp* nursed her two year old twins right in the waiting area. I said, "So, I was still nursing her at that age." They weren't expecting me to stand up for the mother and were backpedaling as fast as they could.:lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tammyw Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 How rude! If she didn't agree, saying so out loud was completely inexcusable. Don't people have any manners???? Seriously, just because I don't agree with what someone else does, doesn't mean I have any right to say so. I nursed my dd until she was 2.5 and my son until just after 2 (they both self weaned), but at that point, I didn't feel comfortable doing it publicly, unfortunately, and I think that's sad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 I would have smiled and given you privacy but probably stayed in the room. But if I were in your church, you would already have known that I did the same thing. Have you ever read "Mothering Your Nursing Toddler"? Love that book! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nmoira Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 I'm sorry this happend to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HayesW Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Well, we are just trying to be more like Jesus. He probably nursed until he was 5 or 6 or 7. Smile sweetly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trailofsparks Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 I went to the Religious Education director's office, but it was right next door to a very noisy RE class, so he couldn't drop off. Afterwards I spoke to her and she swore that she didn't mean us. She was just speaking generally. And she lies to boot! Maybe she just needs some more churchin up. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Well, we are just trying to be more like Jesus. He probably nursed until he was 5 or 6 or 7. Smile sweetly. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitten18 Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Gosh, so much in life just boils down to good manners. Sorry you didn't get treated to some today. :iagree: I miss nursing.:crying: I definitely don't ant any more children I would just like to borrow one to nurse every once in awhile. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 A or B. C is unacceptable and nobody is allowed to have an opinion of someone else's parenting or nursing decision. Period. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in the NH Woods Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Is there anywhere else you can nurse in private? I was an extended breastfeeding mother so I do understand your frustration. I'm not the kind of person to push it though. The people who don't understand will likely never understand. I was pushed out of a mom's group for nursing my toddler. I wasn't even directly told. All of a sudden, I was no longer invited and people avoided me. I found out years later that the mom in charge started spreading rumors about me so everyone would avoid me. I felt so sad when I read your post~ so sorry you experienced this! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Wow! Just wow! Sometimes, the staggering lack of manners exhibited by some human beings is startling. It's 2011 and people still haven't figured out that a. not every thought they ponder needs to be spoken and b. not everything is their business. Rivka, kudos for you for not bonking her on the head! Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pretty in Pink Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 People are obnoxious! I'm sorry that you had to deal with that. How annoying.:grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RanchGirl Posted April 18, 2011 Share Posted April 18, 2011 How awful for you! In the future, I think I would word it like this: "are you guys almost done with this room? I'm looking for a private place to nurse for a few minutes. I can come back later if you're going to be awhile." Once she sat there next to you criticizing, I think I would say something like "That's interesting advice, you know it's the opposite of the research I've read but I'll be sure to give it all the consideration it deserves. I hope you don't mind but I need a little privacy right now, I usually use this time to think about the sermon and pray." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin Posted April 18, 2011 Share Posted April 18, 2011 b. In your place I'd have butted into their conversation. They likely would have cleared out shortly after. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnL Posted April 18, 2011 Share Posted April 18, 2011 Oh my gosh, how completely rude of that person! My response would have likely been to say something like, "Thank you for your unsolicited opinion. Now tell me, what is your opinion on organic vegetables vs. canned vegetables? I'm dying to know so I can make a decision for dinner tonight." And yes, I would have been full of sarcasm. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mimm Posted April 18, 2011 Share Posted April 18, 2011 A or B. C is unacceptable and nobody is allowed to have an opinion of someone else's parenting or nursing decision. Period. Are you being sarcastic? Because I think it's a little extreme to say that no one should have an opinion of each others decisions. I'm sure we all have loads of opinions. But the polite thing to do, unless we are ASKED for our opinion or we have a very serious concern about the safety of the child is to keep it to ourselves. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JVA Posted April 18, 2011 Share Posted April 18, 2011 (edited) Well, we are just trying to be more like Jesus. He probably nursed until he was 5 or 6 or 7. Smile sweetly. Hello. :iagree::iagree: And Samuel was brought to the temple and Eli when Hannah finished nursing him- maybe around 4 or 5? I nursed a lonngg time, too, and hate people's ignorance. But, it's just that- ignorance. And in your case, bad manners. So sorry for you. Keep at it! You're doing a wonderful thing for your little one. Edited April 18, 2011 by JVA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristusG Posted April 18, 2011 Share Posted April 18, 2011 Ummm....wow!! The nerve of people!! I'm not too good in situations like that....I probably would have been so angry and shaking that I would have been speechless. Guess they really would have had something to say about me....I just weaned my 4 year old a week ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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