Changing after swim lessons?

[bry's-gal]

We just signed the girls up for swim lessons. Hubby decided to do Monday nights knowing that I would not be able to go and he would be in charge of handling it all.

 

He does not want my oldest in the male's locker room- she is 6 and he thinks she is to old.

However, I think she is to young to go into the female locker room by herself. I suggested taking her into the male locker room and having her change in one of the toilet stalls- he doesn't think that is a good idea. This particular place has an 18 and older changing area so the grown men are seperate. Most of the people in the locker room are younger children and their parents.

 

What do you guys do about changing when they are this age and the parent is a different gender then the child?

[Guest Cheryl in SoCal]

I think she is way too young to be changing by herself. Do they not have a Family Restroom? Where I live a 6 years old girl wouldn't be considered too old for the men's locker room and I would rather have her there than changing by herself.

 

ETA if that just won't work I'd make sure you or another female adult could take her to the ladies' changing room. Maybe things are different where you are but they are scary where I live and I don't take any chances.

[regentrude]

Does your pool not have a family changing room or at least a family restroom for these situations?

[In The Great White North]

Choice A: Family changing room (ask - it may not be obvious)

 

Choice B: Bathroom out in the hall (not in the locker room)

 

Choice C: The 6 year old in the girls locker room by herself. (I think she's too old for the men's also. Our pool actually limits opposite sex children to 5 and under. I would certainly not want my 6 year old girl changing in with the boys.)

 

Most of the 6 -7 -8 year old girls here do change in the girls' locker room but dad's frequently send another mom in to hurry them up. Not for safety but because they can take 45 minutes to get dressed!

 

Or he could just dry her off and put sweats over her swimsuit on deck. Let her change when she gets home.

[Abigail4476]

We just signed the girls up for swim lessons. Hubby decided to do Monday nights knowing that I would not be able to go and he would be in charge of handling it all.

 

He does not want my oldest in the male's locker room- she is 6 and he thinks she is to old. However' date=' I think she is to young to go into the female locker room by herself. I suggested taking her into the male locker room and having her change in one of the toilet stalls- he doesn't think that is a good idea. This particular place has an 18 and older changing area so the grown men are seperate. Most of the people in the locker room are younger children and their parents.

 

What do you guys do about changing when they are this age and the parent is a different gender then the child?[/quote']

 

I agree with you about a 6 year old being too young to change alone. I also agree with your husband about the men's room; even though there are stalls, boys and men often walk around in the locker room at our swim school completely naked; women do the same in the girls' locker room.

 

Our school has a family bathroom for changing where I can take my ds8 to change after his lesson. Maybe you could ask about a coed/family bathroom?

[2cents]

Does she really have to change at all? When mine were young like that, I had them wear their swimsuit under their jeans and tops. They could just take off their clothes near the pool. Lots of moms did this. After swimming, they are wet so I had terry cloth robes (super thick and long) and they covered up in that for the ride home. They wore crocs for their feet.

[cjzimmer1]

Our swim lessons are at the local high school. We used to use an empty bathroom but then they started locking all the bathroom. Now we just pull a dress over her head in warm weather and then change and shower when we get home or in cold weather we will find an empty locker room and change there but still shower when we get them home.

[Laurie4b]

like others said, check to see if there is a family changing room.

 

If your dh doesn't think the men's lockerroom isn't appropriate, I'm guessing he's right.

 

One thing I used to do with my boys is to bring a large beach towel and have them get in a corner in the pool area, hold up the towel, and let them change behind the towel in the corner. That worked fine.

 

I didn't like bringing them in the ladies' lockerroom because there were obviously nude adult ladies and I didn't think that was appropriate, but I didn't want them in the men's lockerroom alone.

[Delighted3]

Some good options already listed. Our rec center doesn't allow children over age 5 in the opposite dressing rooms. There is a sign saying that you can have a staff member accompany the child into the appropriate dressing room if needed. I think maybe you should just ask the staff what other parents do. I am sure other parents have the same issue.

JMO,

Joy

[NanceXToo]

I don't personally consider age 6 too old to bring into a different gender's restroom/locker room with a parent.

 

I DO consider 6 too young to send into a changing room alone.

 

I think the suggestion you made to your husband was a good one.

 

But if he's really against that, I agree that he should contact pool staff and ask them about it. They might be able to either suggest a place, or offer to let a staff member take her into the women's changing room for you or some such.

[Guest Cheryl in SoCal]

One other thing to think about. If dd can't go into the men's locker room with your dh, where will she go when he changes? Unless there is a Family Changing Room, there will be a time that she won't be supervised by him because he will have to change.

[Farrar]

It sounds like the changing room sort of *is* a family changing room. They have a "grown men alone" changing room and a "men escorting children and teenage boys" changing room? That seems unusual, but if that's really what it is, then she should definitely go in the men's with your dh. I see no issue with it at all personally. I would also see no issue with her going in the women's if she was independent enough, but I agree that it's unusual that most 6 yos would be. My 6 yos could get dressed alone easily, but they wouldn't be able to manage the operation without someone reminding them of what to do - therefore I always take them in with me.

[Dmmetler]

Another option, if there's not a family bathroom-I often have my DD change for cheer practice when we're on the go until then in the back of our van. The windows are tinted (and she's short enough that even if they weren't, she'd be below the line of sight unless someone peeked right in), and I can leave the heat on. With the third row folded down, there's a LOT more room there than in a restroom stall.

[plain jane]

It's just for swimming lessons? So she's the only one doing the swimming? Am I understanding this correctly?

 

If so, I don't know what it's like at your pool, but at the one here lessons are at the same time (for different levels) and there is no public swimming. So, the only people actually using the pool change-rooms are kids.

 

I can see your dh not wanting to take her into the mens change room if men will be using it, but if it's only swimming lessons the only people using it would be little boys- still not ideal, but not horrible. Here lesson class sizes are small so there aren't many people in any change room at any given time.

 

Something to maybe ask the pool staff about anyways. :)

[redsquirrel]

Well, you can't wear a wet suit home here, it is below freezing, lol.

 

The family changing room or a bathroom is prob your best bet. If were my family, my husband would just take a 6 year old into the men's locker room. It is pro mostly filled with kids.

 

Our Y has four dressing rooms:

 

Men's changing room: Only males ages 13 and older

 

Women's changing room: only females ages 13 and older

 

Boys's changing room: boys under the age of 13 and adult men with young children of either gender up to age 7

 

Girls's changing room: Girls under the age of 13 and adult women with children of either gender up to the age of 7.

 

In the boy and girl changing room there are curtains at the end of the first two rows of lockers. The last row has no curtains. In the girls's locker room there is a sign up stating that only girls and their accompanying adult women may go in the rows with the curtains. The uncurtained row is for boys or girls. It is the opposite in the boy locker room. So, if you are a woman with a little girl to change you can go in the girl locker room and go behind a curtain and not have your little girl seen by a little boy. The little boys don't get the same consideration for some reason.

 

However, the uncurtained row is closest to the shower so that is where everyone goes. It leaves me with my little boy quite squashed at times.

 

Other than that, I really like the system. Oh, and if your 8 year old isn't ready to change themselves (and many are not) there is a family changing room but that has NO privacy. It is off the hall.

 

Stupid thing I don't like: they don't heat the kids locker rooms. It's like because they are kids, they are not worth of heat. It really bothers me.

[Jayne J]

We have the exact same issue here--dh takes ds and dd to swim lessons. He has her wait with the lifeguard while he changes himself and ds, and then takes her down the hall to the handicapped accessable restroom (with permsission), while ds waits right outside. It is big enough for both of them so he can help her, and it is a single room, so no other folks to worry about. You could check to see if there is a handicapped accessable restroom elsewhere in the facility.

[bettyandbob]

At my pool during evening swim lessons, there is very little space for other swimmers and the manager makes it clear to any other swimmers that teachers and students have priority. Consequently, there are not a lot of people besides kids in swimming lessons. Children 6 and over are not permitted in opposite sex locker rooms. Our options are

 

1. go alone in appropriate sex locker room

2. use family changing room (often has a long line)

3. take wet child upstairs to regular bathrooms and go in one of those to change

4. bring a large beach towel and hold it around child while she changes on deck

 

FWIW my two olders went into the locker rooms on their own at this age. Like I said during swim lessons almost everyone at the pool is associated with a lesson. My youngest has a developmental disability. He takes regular lessons at the pool to which I've been refering. We wait in line for the family changing. He actually needs some help with his clothing, so we could not do the deck change. At the pool where he participates in special olympics, we change before lessons in a regular bathroom to avoid the wait at their family changing room. Afterwards we wait for the family changing because the regular bathroom is a long distance and tramping the lenghth of two floors of the building in bathing attire is not permitted.

 

The only trouble I've noticed with unaccompanied girls is taking really long showers, spending time playing under the big dryer, and generally not staying focused on getting dressed. Occassionally, a dad will ask a female staff member to check and say "hurry up". I've noticed more than one dad who's simply given up and just sits for a long time with a book or playing with their blackberry/ipad.

 

I teach swimming. I make these observations both as a parent coming to lessons and as an employee of the pool.

[Danestress]

I always took my sons to swim lessons several times a week at that age. They were not allowed in the girl's dressing room, and I was not going to send them in the men's alone.

 

Even in the bitter cold, it was not that big of a deal to just throw warm clothes on them and let them change and shower at home. This won't work if your husband has a lot of other errands to run, but otherwise it should be fine.

[lulubelle]

In our rec center, 6 years and older must be in their designated locker rooms. But, at certain times, maybe 3 - 6 pm, there is a high school student that is payed to sit and keep an eye on things. It is uncomfortable to think of your child in there by herself. But, if your husband stands right outside the door in case of any problems, that would be okay.

[twoxcell]

Our YMCA has a family locker room. Dh uses it when he takes dd1 to swim lessons. If I take the kids by myself my ds1 7.5 does change by himself in the boys locker room, and I take dd in the girls. They have a separate locker room for men 18 and older.

[elise1mds]

Boys over the age of 5 aren't allowed in the women's locker room at our swim facility (and vice versa). They do have family changing rooms, but they are often occupied by families with multiple children taking classes simultaneously, and I only have DS. I have enlisted the staff to help me out and let DS go change by himself. There have been several times I have sent someone into the men's locker room to check on him, especially if I know there is an older child or an adult male in there, and they never object. They also have no problems with me hovering right outside the door and occasionally cracking it open to verbally check on his status. They don't want problems, either :)

[Sun]

... So, if you are a woman with a little girl to change you can go in the girl locker room and go behind a curtain and not have your little girl seen by a little boy. The little boys don't get the same consideration for some reason.

...

 

Isn't the curtained area more for the adult women to be able to change themselves with a bit of privacy when they're accompanying a child? (I mean as opposed to being so little girls won't be seen by little boys.)

 

The unheated thing would really bug me! Brrr!

[Mommyfaithe]

I change my little ones (under 7) right in the hallway outside the pool. I cover them up with a long bathrobe and then carefully change the without ever exposing them. I make sure it is very non-chalant...and off in the corner. I also make sure we leave everything dry. i will not allow my little boys into the mens room themselves...and the women in the Locker room have absolutely no modesty...so much so, it has embarrased me...and I don't blush too easily...nuff said.

 

Faithe

[Dobela]

When my son was young and taking swimming lessons I would cover his head and take him to the women's showers. He couldn't see out and thought it was a funny game. I would change him behind the curtains, cover his head again, and we would go out. Several of the moms did this. Maybe your dh could do this? After awhile, the girls would go with their moms to change first, then the moms with boys would go in.

[happypamama]

Whether I'd let a 6yo go by herself into the women's locker room would depend highly on the facility, who else was there at the time, and the child. It might be okay in some instances and not others.

 

I'd inquire about a family changing area, or see if there is somewhere else the facility can provide. Another option would be to ask for help from another mother whose child is in the class.

[redsquirrel]

Isn't the curtained area more for the adult women to be able to change themselves with a bit of privacy when they're accompanying a child? (I mean as opposed to being so little girls won't be seen by little boys.)

 

The unheated thing would really bug me! Brrr!

 

I was told when we joined that there are people in the community who have very strict rules about having their daughters seen by boys while changing and the curtains are there for them. I was told that even if my boy is an infant I am to change with him in the uncurtained area to prevent girls from being seen by him. They can see my naked 5 year old son with no problem so I am not really sure what problem the curtains solves.

 

I guess it could be for adult women but that would involve leaving our young sons alone while we changed. We can't take the boys behind the curtain. I often have to change into my own suit when I take my young son into the girls's changing room and I get no privacy. I cannot go into the curtained area because I have to help my son. There are lots of moms changing in the uncurtained area. Like I said, it is the closest to the shower so there are lots of everyone in the uncurtained area.

[nd293]

Where we are boys over 5yrs are not supposed to be in the women's changerooms, so they provide family changerooms, although only one or two, which is not nearly enough. But honestly, for children 6 & 4 we would either change them by the side of the pool, or take them home in swimsuits and towels.

Edited January 11, 2011 by nd293

[bry's-gal]

Thanks for all of the responses!

 

Hubby and I talked more last night. We both see each other's point and we both have valid points.

Next week, he is going to check on the family restroom and I'll also have him see if there is another bathroom elsewhere that might be empty. I never thought to have an employee go in with the girls and check on them- that might be worth pursuing!

 

When swim lessons are over, there is hardly any one else but kids/parents around. He will check out the men's locker room and if it is not that crowded, just take the girls in there to change.

If it is crowded, we'll just toss clothes on over them and let them go home wet. It's pretty cold here during the winter so that is not the best scenario but will have to do.

[Sun]

I was told when we joined that there are people in the community who have very strict rules about having their daughters seen by boys while changing and the curtains are there for them. I was told that even if my boy is an infant I am to change with him in the uncurtained area to prevent girls from being seen by him. They can see my naked 5 year old son with no problem so I am not really sure what problem the curtains solves.

 

I guess it could be for adult women but that would involve leaving our young sons alone while we changed. We can't take the boys behind the curtain. I often have to change into my own suit when I take my young son into the girls's changing room and I get no privacy. I cannot go into the curtained area because I have to help my son. There are lots of moms changing in the uncurtained area. Like I said, it is the closest to the shower so there are lots of everyone in the uncurtained area.

 

How very odd!

 

I think it's time to start lobbying for more family change rooms at pools. Maybe I'm a bit paranoid, but I'd rather send a 6-year-old girl into the women's locker room alone than a 6-yo boy into the men's room. There was a molestation incident in the men's room at a Chuck E Cheese south of here a few years ago (where the dad walked in on his son being molested), and ever since then the idea of sending DS into a locker room on his own just worries me. I will no longer go the pool closest to my house that doesn't have a family change room available.

[Sherry in OH]

At our Y, children of the opposite sex are not permitted in the men's and women's locker rooms. I assume no one would complain about a baby, but toddler and up must use the family locker rooms. Some parents with same sex children also prefer to use the family locker rooms. There are always lines immediately after swim lessons.

[AK_Mom4]

Or he could just dry her off and put sweats over her swimsuit on deck. Let her change when she gets home.

 

:iagree:

 

This is what we have done for years. They shower when they get home.