Do Hard Things: the book, is it for us?

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

I'm curious about the book "Do Hard Things: A Teenage Rebellion Against Low Expectations "

 

I don't know much about it, but the title is intriguing. I just found out the authors are Christian kids. And that raises a warning flag for me. No offense meant to anyone here, but there is a wide variety within Christians. The book may be great if you think like those authors, but it may not be that great if you're not from 'their kind' of Christianity. It could even be offensive. There's an excerpt here:

http://www.therebelution.com/books/dohardthings/book_preview.htm

It seems tame enough but it's just chapter 1.

 

So before I put this book into my son's hands, I would like to know more about the tones and undertones of this book.

FYI, we are Catholics (with a tendency to be quite liberal, sometimes too much for Catholicism.. oops)

Edited August 22, 2010 by CleoQc

[cathmom]

I've wondered the same thing.

[tex-mex]

I'm pre-reading this book for son. Half way thru it now. So far, I find it to be very middle of the road with evangelical Christianity. (I tend to be very on the other end of the spectrum and not the least bit denominational. Hubby is a former ordained minister and missionary. We homechurch for example. LOL) It strikes me as being neutral to denominational differences -- and -- very idealistic as the authors are still young. Life has not hit them full force, kwim? But that is okay for me. I don't need to depress my kid with the harsh realities of life and how (at times) God doesn't make sense. ;)

 

I am deciding to use the book as a tool to get my child more involved in his community with a project or goal. Community service. I do like how it is written from a teen-to-teen POV. My kid would "tune out" if he heard this encouragement from an adult or Pastor. Hehehee. :D

Edited August 22, 2010 by tex-mex

[ScoutTN]

I enjoyed it and got some good ideas from it. Much there related to the recent thread about why 20 somethings don't seem to grow up lately.

 

Basically they just challenge the myth of adolescence.

 

I really don't know if it's too Christian for you - why not get it from the library? No loss if you don't like it.

[tex-mex]

I enjoyed it and got some good ideas from it. Much there related to the recent thread about why 20 somethings don't seem to grow up lately.

 

Basically they just challenge the myth of adolescence.

 

I really don't know if it's too Christian for you - why not get it from the library? No loss if you don't like it.

:iagree: That was what sold it for me. Not the Christian message. But the fact that teens can DO SOMETHING instead of hanging out at the mall, playing video games, or getting drunk. They do not have to fall into that mindset or stereotype. Which is why I am using it as a tool for my son to do some community service.

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

why not get it from the library? No loss if you don't like it.

 

Simply because it's not available .... We live in French speaking country and the book hasn't been translated to be available to us through ILL... English books are rare indeed...

[HollyDay]

I read it last summer and it does not stand out in my mind as being overly remarkable. The basic idea is that society has very low expectations of teens. Teens in our society are expected to rebel, expected to not do anything but school, and expected not to have ambitions beyond texting, fashion, boys/girls, etc. It is a situation where teens do not rise about "average" or mediocre because nothing more is expected. After chaperoning youth group for the first time, I understand this concept better :confused:

 

Now, the book challenges teens to rise about mediocre. To set higher standards, to try difficult tasks, to take more responsibility. You are probably doing this in your family already since you homeschool. If you are encouraging independent learning and set a high standard of academics, creativity, and the like, you are challenging your dc to "do hard things".

 

I don't think there is anything in the book that would be troublesome for a Catholic. I don't think it is a bad read either.

 

I was really surprised by the youth group teens. I have never heard "like" so much! "Like, he was like so cute and he like kissed me on like the first date and like it was so like sweeeeeeet and like I couldn't wait to like tell my BFFL. He is like, so hot, like, I mean, like really......." The teens looked and acted bored and disrespectful for the most part. They were "like only there for the pizza and guys". My dd is involved in a ton of activities through sports, art, and music. She has quite a bit of interaction with teens her own age both homeschooled and otherwise. But, this experience really made me see why we "like have so many, like immature high school graduates". The dc she interacts with on a weekly basis want to participate in the activity. They know it is a privilege, not a right. It is competitive and they know if they do not make a dedicated effort, they can be dropped from the program. I guess they are aware of expectations and the need to meet them.

 

It is the old saying "don't set low standards and fail to meet them".

Edited August 22, 2010 by HollyDay

[Audrey]

I'm curious about the book "Do Hard Things: A Teenage Rebellion Against Low Expectations "

 

I don't know much about it, but the title is intriguing. I just found out the authors are Christian kids. And that raises a warning flag for me. No offense meant to anyone here, but there is a wide variety within Christians. The book may be great if you think like those authors, but it may not be that great if you're not from 'their kind' of Christianity. It could even be offensive. There's an excerpt here:

http://www.therebelution.com/books/dohardthings/book_preview.htm

It seems tame enough but it's just chapter 1.

 

So before I put this book into my son's hands, I would like to know more about the tones and undertones of this book.

FYI, we are Catholics (with a tendency to be quite liberal, sometimes too much for Catholicism.. oops)

 

 

I have read it and found it explicitly evangelical Christian in tone and message. While I do not think you will object to the overall theme and the "directions" in the book, you will probably be uncomfortable with the way they choose to discuss it. The whole "do it for the glory of god" thing is presented in a very specific type of christian manner. IMO, it is not a Catholic-friendly one either. (This is my opinion and the opinion of my ex-Catholic dh who understands the Catholic doctrine and teachings far better than I.)

 

If you do purchase it, I would recommend pre-reading it before your son. If it isn't for you, I'm sure you won't have a hard time selling it off later.

[stripe]

I've read it too.

 

It is partly generically inspiring about how teens are underestimated, but I found some of their examples of neat teen behavior to be ... sort of boring (quite a bit dedicated to an online survey about modest clothes they conducted). It wasn't about the topic; it was the project itself -- maybe I missed something. Anyway, it was okay but a very quick read as far as I was concerned.

[LauraGB]

I have read it and found it explicitly evangelical Christian in tone and message. While I do not think you will object to the overall theme and the "directions" in the book, you will probably be uncomfortable with the way they choose to discuss it. The whole "do it for the glory of god" thing is presented in a very specific type of christian manner. IMO, it is not a Catholic-friendly one either. (This is my opinion and the opinion of my ex-Catholic dh who understands the Catholic doctrine and teachings far better than I.)

 

If you do purchase it, I would recommend pre-reading it before your son. If it isn't for you, I'm sure you won't have a hard time selling it off later.

 

I agree with this. Definitely more evangelical Christian. Even my kids sighed a few times (we listened to it instead of read it), as did I, because the references to the bible or Christian thoughts were peppered so heavily that we almost forgot what the point of some sections had been (the no dating one comes immediately to mind - I believe the older brother wrote the book I Kissed Dating Goodbye). *But* it is quite inspirational to the target audience (young adults), and my kids quite liked the overall message which is to keep trying a little harder and doing a little more than the least of what is expected of you.

 

Pre read it and see what you think; with things like this, it's hard to tell what level of Christian (even among Christians) is comfortable, kwim?

[In The Great White North]

I asked a similar question awhile ago. Here's the thread:

 

http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forums/showthread.php?t=66013

 

I also got a pm (which I've since deleted) which led me to decide that it was too evangelical for us. I decided not to buy it for ds.

[Brilliant]

My teens and I read this book last year. I was disappointed in it because I was hoping for inspiration for rising above mediocrity. But the discussions about working hard, doing your best, serving your family and God on a daily basis, etc., seemed to be more of an afterthought to their stories of their own exciting opportunities, and other examples of doing unique things.

 

Here's an example: They featured a story about a teen who started a charity. That's great - except - aren't there a lot of charities out there already that could use your teen's help? My kids and I had spent lots of hours volunteering at a food bank, but I got the impression that something like that doesn't meet their criteria for doing hard (i.e. great) things. And as for clerking for a state supreme court justice - nice! - if you can get it! If your dad is famous and you know Chuck Norris.

 

I think we can all do "hard" things, but there just isn't room in this world for us all to start our own charity or business, or pull strings to get a great internship, etc.

 

I have friends who love the book and who have hauled their teens to the Rebelution events. I'm glad they get encouragement from it. But my kids and I didn't much.

 

I guess this was off-topic as to whether this book would be offensive to your faith. Sorry I can't answer that. But I just wanted to point out, I personally don't think your teens will miss out on too much if you skip the book.

[Catherine]

1) telling the tale of the authors' successes

 

2)very much a conservative, evangelical slant on Christianity

 

I so wanted to like this book because of its basic message, that young adults are capable of great things, and our expectations of them are waaay too low. But the authors' lives are so much more wrapped up in their religion and politics than ours that it was very hard to identify with them. My son didn't find it very inspiring.

 

I don't know of a similar book, but I've just finished Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell and it was a very interesting read. Because it clearly shows the role of motivation and hard work in success, I'm going to encourage my kids to read it too.

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

I asked a similar question awhile ago. Here's the thread:

 

Thank you. I had done a search on the board before, and nothing came up, which I found surprising.

 

 

I'm thinking now that, based on answers here, and on the previous thread, that the book would be too evangelical for us. I think my son would simply not recognise himself .

 

Thank you everyone.

[Renee in NC]

I have read it and found it explicitly evangelical Christian in tone and message. While I do not think you will object to the overall theme and the "directions" in the book, you will probably be uncomfortable with the way they choose to discuss it. The whole "do it for the glory of god" thing is presented in a very specific type of christian manner. IMO, it is not a Catholic-friendly one either. (This is my opinion and the opinion of my ex-Catholic dh who understands the Catholic doctrine and teachings far better than I.)

 

If you do purchase it, I would recommend pre-reading it before your son. If it isn't for you, I'm sure you won't have a hard time selling it off later.

 

I'm Catholic and I read it and didn't find it objectionable. However, I am glad that I did not *buy* the book because it was pretty, well, unremarkable. A previous poster summed it up well and the book took a long time to say basically the same thing.

 

ETA: I agree with the Outliers recommendation!

[EKS]

It is *very* Christian, which from my perspective is too bad because I think the message is an excellent one . But because of the Christian aspect I could never give it to my son to read.

[cathmom]

ETA: I agree with the Outliers recommendation!

 

Mindset is also a great book that encourages working hard.

[MSNative]

I agree with the pps. You may also consider Start Here. It's their next book. Gives many more concrete examples - still Christian, but more useful for anyone I think. For example one boy mentioned raised money to build a well in Sudan. They detail the steps to take to start any action and encourage kids to get involved.

[happi duck]

My teens and I read this book last year. I was disappointed in it because I was hoping for inspiration for rising above mediocrity. But the discussions about working hard, doing your best, serving your family and God on a daily basis, etc., seemed to be more of an afterthought to their stories of their own exciting opportunities, and other examples of doing unique things.

 

Here's an example: They featured a story about a teen who started a charity. That's great - except - aren't there a lot of charities out there already that could use your teen's help? My kids and I had spent lots of hours volunteering at a food bank, but I got the impression that something like that doesn't meet their criteria for doing hard (i.e. great) things. And as for clerking for a state supreme court justice - nice! - if you can get it! If your dad is famous and you know Chuck Norris.

 

I think we can all do "hard" things, but there just isn't room in this world for us all to start our own charity or business, or pull strings to get a great internship, etc.

 

I have friends who love the book and who have hauled their teens to the Rebelution events. I'm glad they get encouragement from it. But my kids and I didn't much.

 

I guess this was off-topic as to whether this book would be offensive to your faith. Sorry I can't answer that. But I just wanted to point out, I personally don't think your teens will miss out on too much if you skip the book.

 

:iagree: Well said!

 

I did not like this book at all. I agree that society sets low expectations for teens and teens should be encouraged to rise above. However, to me, this book glorifies, what are, IMHO, lame, self-serving projects. "Look at me! Look at me! I'm doin' a 'hard' thing!" The families I know that are "into" this seem to be wasting so much time to be impressive when as stated above there are so many other needs and charities that need manpower. Meanwhile, so many other teens quietly toil away in true service to others without any hoopla. I think those are the kids who are making a difference and will continue to serve others as adults.

 

I think this book is unnecessary. :rant:

[stripe]

Another example of a not-that-exciting "challenge" was a teen girl to go by herself to evangelize to a group of men. I am not sure this is smart or safe, much less inspiring to most teens.

[sadiegirl]

I bought the book thinking it would be a great read/discussion for my 8th and 9th graders. So far, nothing but groans as they read it...we haven't been that impressed! and I really wanted to like the book.

[hillfarm]

I am a hard core, evangelistic Christian and I found the book to be rather ho hum also. IMO, the whole thing was summed up in the title. Do hard things. Okay. The point of which being......?

 

I totally agree that teens are underestimated, undervalued, and underchallenged in our society. So are tweens and children, for that matter. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see that perhaps a good response would be to encourage them to ignore the opinions of society and to challenge themselves. Particularly in ways that help others.

 

I have taught this concept to dd since she was about 6yo. I looked forward to reading the book because I had heard so much about it. I nearly fell asleep during it. Not much new information. I didn't see much in there about how to select appropriate hard things to do, nothing in there about disciplining and training oneself to do those things, and nothing about developing long term character traits. Honestly, it seemed to me to be more flash than substance. Good idea, but basically a one-thought book.

 

I don't remember too much in there that would be offensive to other denominations, but IMO, there wasn't all that much in there, period. HTH

[FriedClams]

I liked the book's general message to teens - NOW is the time to try something beyond what you think you can do. NOW, when you don't have bills or a mortgage. NOW, when you have time. Yes, the book was written by teens - but I like the general idea.

 

I would highly recommend the book QBQ! The Question Behind the Question: Practicing Personal Accountability in business and life. It's a quick read but I enjoyed the message to take responsibility to do something to improve things around you. It will be required reading for my kids.

Edited August 23, 2010 by Kayaking Mom

[BeckyFL]

I ordered it from the library and have been paging through. It seems so far like a lot of stories about the authors. I decided not to use it.

 

Instead, I ordered one from CBD that got very good reviews. Who You Are When No One's Looking by Bill Hybels.

 

http://www.christianbook.com/who-you-are-when-ones-looking/bill-hybels/9780877849452/pd/9455

[patchfire]

I've read it, hoping it would work for us. It was, as others have said, rather ho-hum, in addition to seemingly focused on a particular approach to what "hard things" were.

 

I would highly recommend The Case Against Adolescence and/or Escaping the Endless Adolescence, even though neither is written explicitly to teens.

[BeckyFL]

I ordered it from the library and have been paging through. It seems so far like a lot of stories about the authors. I decided not to use it.

 

Instead, I ordered one from CBD that got very good reviews. Who You Are When No One's Looking by Bill Hybels.

 

http://www.christianbook.com/who-you-are-when-ones-looking/bill-hybels/9780877849452/pd/9455