So I get a box in the mail from my mom...

[Aubrey]

It's got a new cordless phone, some magazine parts, a book of origami, seasoning salt, a container of cocoa powder, a sticker book, etc.

 

I love my mom, but the contents of the box make me want to cry and laugh hysterically at the same time. It's like instead of sorting her stuff into keep, give away, and trash, she sorts it into keep, give to Aubrey, give to someone else. There is no trash. There is no anonymous give-away.

 

So I know what you're thinking. Look through the box, say "Thanks, Mom," & move on w/ life.

 

Mom doesn't work that way. She still wants to know if the kids have made the balloon animals she sent before Christmas. (I put the darn things in give away *immediately.*) She keeps saying, "Well maybe those would be good to occupy them while ___________." But of course, I don't need to "occupy" the bigs, & decorating & blowing up balloons (w/ permanent markers) is hardly something I'd hand over to my littles to make. my. day. easier. :lol:

 

So she's already asked twice now about the stuff she sent in the most recent box. That's not counting when I actually called to thank her for it, complete w/ concrete examples of how much my 2yo loved her Valentine's card & how excited dh was to get a new phone.

 

"Have the kids tried the origami yet?" Not yet, Mom.

 

"How about the sticker book?" Well...did you look at it, Mom?

 

"No, why?" The sticker clothes for the girls are...kind-of inappropriate.

 

"Oh. Well you could take those out." Sure, but that's all there is for tops.

 

"Why don't you just make your own clothes for them, then!"

 

Yeah, because making sticker-clothes (to replace slutty sticker-clothes) for slightly-slutty sticker dolls is *just* what I needed to add to my to-do list for today. Thanks!

 

Of course, she'll be asking about it again next time we talk. Ugh. :001_huh:

[Hathersage]

My mom is very similar. To top it off when she comes to visit, she will even wander around my house looking for the items she gave us.

[Rosie_0801]

~The salt is tucked away in my pantry up high so the tots can't get to it and spill it over the floor.

 

~Everyone is drinking cocoa as we speak, and it has been suggested that we buy marshmellows.

 

~We need to get some pretty paper for the origami.

 

~Ah, the sticker book. Unfortunately the youngest got to them first and lets just say that I think sticker books need to wait until certain persons can be trusted.

 

Those things are not so difficult to arrange ;)

 

My aunt gives us equally crazy things each Christmas, but she gets them all for free from the tip. It's kind of fun to see what unnecessary weird thing she'll bring along next. Jackpot this past Christmas, she gave me a huge bag of buttons. I'm inspired to all sorts of ideas ;)

 

Rosie

[JudoMom]

~The salt is tucked away in my pantry up high so the tots can't get to it and spill it over the floor.

 

~Everyone is drinking cocoa as we speak, and it has been suggested that we buy marshmellows.

 

~We need to get some pretty paper for the origami.

 

~Ah, the sticker book. Unfortunately the youngest got to them first and lets just say that I think sticker books need to wait until certain persons can be trusted.

 

Those things are not so difficult to arrange ;)

 

My aunt gives us equally crazy things each Christmas, but she gets them all for free from the tip. It's kind of fun to see what unnecessary weird thing she'll bring along next. Jackpot this past Christmas, she gave me a huge bag of buttons. I'm inspired to all sorts of ideas ;)

 

Rosie

 

I think Rosie's onto something.

 

 

1. Open box from Mom.
   
2. Remove contents you want to keep.
   
3. Place box on floor in front of dd. Yes, the spunky one.
   
4. Leave room.
   
5. Sadly report to Mom that dd got into the box. Again.
   

 

:lol:

[newbie]

LOL, I am laughing at the slightly slutty sticker dolls. Thanks for the laugh.

[newbie]

Just tell her no more boxes, right now. You are trying to clear stuff out, and dont want her great gifts to get mixed in w/stuff you are throwing out.

 

And, maybe it will cost too much to send odd stuff to Malaysia.

[lionfamily1999]

I think Rosie's onto something.

 

 

1. Open box from Mom.
   
2. Remove contents you want to keep.
   
3. Place box on floor in front of dd. Yes, the spunky one.
   
4. Leave room.
   
5. Sadly report to Mom that dd got into the box. Again.
   

:lol:

I agree!

 

Start a poll, I think the results will be in favor of this ;)

[Corraleno]

Yeah, because making sticker-clothes (to replace slutty sticker-clothes) for slightly-slutty sticker dolls is *just* what I needed to add to my to-do list for today. Thanks!

 

:lol:

 

I like JudoMom's idea of "accidently" leaving the box on the floor with the littles. You don't happen to have a dog do you? :tongue_smilie:

 

Jackie

[Aubrey]

I think Rosie's onto something.

 

 

1. Open box from Mom.
   
2. Remove contents you want to keep.
   
3. Place box on floor in front of dd. Yes, the spunky one.
   
4. Leave room.
   
5. Sadly report to Mom that dd got into the box. Again.
   

:lol:

 

Ohmygosh. You're brilliant. Scissors, too, right? Oh, wait. :001_huh:

 

Hmmm...she's spunky enought that I know better than to count on her to tear up stuff I *want* her to tear up. And the other two are really good about catching & stopping her.

 

(She came screaming to me yesterday that ds9 was going to "cut my hair!" Instead, it turns out, she'd gotten hold of another pair of scissors, to which he began shouting, "Hair Alert, Hair Alert!!" until he & dd6 were able to confiscate said scissors.)

 

Still...maybe I could sprinkle food inside the box & leave it between her & my meat-eater.

[6packofun]

All I know is that this post was worth it just for the "slutty sticker clothes" comment. LOL!! (((((Aubrey)))))

[6packofun]

You know, I thought about it for a minute and I think it would be totally cool if you could spend ONE afternoon with the kiddos making some of that stuff to send BACK to your mom, so that she knows you got some use out of it. I don't know if that would prompt more packages, but she'd probably be delighted! :D Grandmas never get "care packages", ya know!

[Remudamom]

You know, I thought about it for a minute and I think it would be totally cool if you could spend ONE afternoon with the kiddos making some of that stuff to send BACK to your mom, so that she knows you got some use out of it. I don't know if that would prompt more packages, but she'd probably be delighted! :D Grandmas never get "care packages", ya know!

 

Yeah, you should try that. My mom sent the girls a red feather boa that shed all over the house. I saved the feathers and mailed them back to her. Course, she loved the joke.

[Mommyfaithe]

It's got a new cordless phone, some magazine parts, a book of origami, seasoning salt, a container of cocoa powder, a sticker book, etc.

 

I love my mom, but the contents of the box make me want to cry and laugh hysterically at the same time. It's like instead of sorting her stuff into keep, give away, and trash, she sorts it into keep, give to Aubrey, give to someone else. There is no trash. There is no anonymous give-away.

 

So I know what you're thinking. Look through the box, say "Thanks, Mom," & move on w/ life.

 

Mom doesn't work that way. She still wants to know if the kids have made the balloon animals she sent before Christmas. (I put the darn things in give away *immediately.*) She keeps saying, "Well maybe those would be good to occupy them while ___________." But of course, I don't need to "occupy" the bigs, & decorating & blowing up balloons (w/ permanent markers) is hardly something I'd hand over to my littles to make. my. day. easier. :lol:

 

So she's already asked twice now about the stuff she sent in the most recent box. That's not counting when I actually called to thank her for it, complete w/ concrete examples of how much my 2yo loved her Valentine's card & how excited dh was to get a new phone.

 

"Have the kids tried the origami yet?" Not yet, Mom.

 

"How about the sticker book?" Well...did you look at it, Mom?

 

"No, why?" The sticker clothes for the girls are...kind-of inappropriate.

 

"Oh. Well you could take those out." Sure, but that's all there is for tops.

 

"Why don't you just make your own clothes for them, then!"

 

Yeah, because making sticker-clothes (to replace slutty sticker-clothes) for slightly-slutty sticker dolls is *just* what I needed to add to my to-do list for today. Thanks!

 

Of course, she'll be asking about it again next time we talk. Ugh. :001_huh:

 

THIS SOUNDS JUST LIKE MY MOM...nOTE TO SELF...never give kids big box of crap I don't know what to do with....donate it and send kids a gift cert for a pizza party of some other fun thing.

 

~~Faithe

[Mommyfaithe]

You know, I thought about it for a minute and I think it would be totally cool if you could spend ONE afternoon with the kiddos making some of that stuff to send BACK to your mom, so that she knows you got some use out of it. I don't know if that would prompt more packages, but she'd probably be delighted! :D Grandmas never get "care packages", ya know!

 

You are a GENIUS!!!

[Rosie_0801]

Over the years my millionaire inlaws have given their dearly beloved, only son, 13 packets of cards they've pinched off cruise ships, airplanes and out of motels. I wanted to use them to decoupage a coffee table and give it back for Christmas, but he wouldn't let me.

 

:confused: :D

 

Rosie

[lionfamily1999]

I would love a playing card table.

[Heather in Neverland]

well, look at it this way...she is getting good practice for when you are here in Malaysia! :D

 

 

And here's something that did not occur to me at first...if you get the job here, you will be teaching my ds next year!

[RoughCollie]

Aubrey, what are magazine parts?

[Parrothead]

Aubrey, what are magazine parts?

The only thing I could think of is a bunch of springs, floorplates, bodies, etc for ammo magazines. Otherwise maybe it is staples and glossy paper.

[lionfamily1999]

When will we know btw? Really, does it help when the principal says "She would be great!, she's one of my imaginary friends." ?:lol:

Lol! I can't even imagine.

[Aubrey]

well, look at it this way...she is getting good practice for when you are here in Malaysia! :D

 

 

And here's something that did not occur to me at first...if you get the job here, you will be teaching my ds next year!

 

*gulp* No pressure, right? :lol: But I guess you'll be my kids' principal. Complaining about ea other on the boards will be a delicate matter. ;) :D

[Aubrey]

Aubrey, what are magazine parts?

 

See, my mom thinks "culling" means reading. through. an. entire. magazine. reeeeeeeeeaally fast, ripping out the articles she doesn't want & tossing them, ripping out the articles someone else might want & mailing them, & then glorying in the fact that your magazine pile is now 11.5" high instead of a solid foot.

 

So I have bits & pieces of magazines that "you might find interesting." Some still have binding but lots of missing pages. Some are just missing pages. There's no indication as to WHAT part might be interesting. There's an article on "your happy weight," one on how to make oatmeal w/ ice cream (I've told y'all where I get my, er, "cooking" skills), & a handwritten list of websites tucked inside. From what I can tell, none of these is in any way related to another. (Kind-of like conversations w/ mom, lol.)

[Aubrey]

When will we know btw? Really, does it help when the principal says "She would be great!, she's one of my imaginary friends." ?:lol:

 

LOL--that's what most of my references will say. :001_huh:

[Rosie_0801]

There's an article on how to make oatmeal w/ ice cream (I've told y'all where I get my, er, "cooking" skills),

 

You wanna know something? I ate museli and ice cream for breakfast the other day. It was really good, honey and macadamia or something scrummy. We ought to turn the fridge back off before I get into any dreadful habits. It *really* was good, just the sort of thing you want when you wake up in a rotten mood and don't want to talk to any of your relatives; and I have a lot of those mornings.

 

;)

Rosie

[sassenach]

My mom is very similar. To top it off when she comes to visit, she will even wander around my house looking for the items she gave us.

 

My MIL does that! It drives me crazy.

[Heather in Neverland]

When will we know btw? Really, does it help when the principal says "She would be great!, she's one of my imaginary friends." ?:lol:

 

snicker snicker snort :lol:

[Heather in Neverland]

*gulp* No pressure, right? :lol: But I guess you'll be my kids' principal. Complaining about ea other on the boards will be a delicate matter. ;) :D

 

Yeah, we're going to have to get new board names...an alias...;)

[elegantlion]

When will we know btw? Really, does it help when the principal says "She would be great!, she's one of my imaginary friends." ?:lol:

 

:lol::lol::lol:

 

Slutty sticker book? :glare: Wow, things have changed.

 

My mom sends stuff like that, but they go to auctions. :confused: When we visited them I got a whole box of dry erase markers I was excited about. Drug them home and 1/2 of them didn't work.

[Laurie4b]

You know, I thought about it for a minute and I think it would be totally cool if you could spend ONE afternoon with the kiddos making some of that stuff to send BACK to your mom, so that she knows you got some use out of it. I don't know if that would prompt more packages, but she'd probably be delighted! :D Grandmas never get "care packages", ya know!

 

Too funny.... but don't forget to ask her where she hung it, if she is wearing it, etc. etc.

[Aludlam]

I laughed until I was crying for real. My mom never sent me a box in the mail. She use to save all the stuff up in big black garbage bags, and load the trunk up when she came for a visit. It would take me a week to sort out all the "gifts". My girls loved it because there was always at least a dozen toys from the thrift store in there. I lost my mom about a year and a half ago. What I wouldn't give for one more of those bags.

 

Angela

[Corraleno]

Too funny.... but don't forget to ask her where she hung it, if she is wearing it, etc. etc.

 

YES! I think you should get a big piece of posterboard and a big bottle of Elmer's glue and give the kids each a pair of scissors and all the magazine parts, stickers, balloon animals, origami paper, etc., and tell them to make a big collage for Grandma. Then frame it, mail it back to her, and ask her whether she plans to hang it in the living room or the kitchen. :D

 

Maybe she'll think twice about what she puts in the box if she knows she'll be expected to hang it up in her house later!

 

Jackie

[newbie]

YES! I think you should get a big piece of posterboard and a big bottle of Elmer's glue and give the kids each a pair of scissors and all the magazine parts, stickers, balloon animals, origami paper, etc., and tell them to make a big collage for Grandma. Then frame it, mail it back to her, and ask her whether she plans to hang it in the living room or the kitchen. :D

 

Maybe she'll think twice about what she puts in the box if she knows she'll be expected to hang it up in her house later!

 

Jackie

 

classic

[JFSinIL]

My mil saves all sorts of oddments and gives them to us in old grocery bags - 99% is pure junk but there is always that gem so I dig through it all... she grew up during the Depression and can't bear to waste a thing!

[Aubrey]

Too funny.... but don't forget to ask her where she hung it, if she is wearing it, etc. etc.

 

:smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5:

[Aubrey]

Maybe she'll think twice about what she puts in the box if she knows she'll be expected to hang it up in her house later!

 

Nope. It'd pretty much fit her decor--she's always buying & fixing up houses, so they're in various stages of cement-without-carpet or being-painted or whatever.

 

But she *would* like to get something like that. One time when she was here, we helped the kids hang all their artwork from the last few months, like an art show, & she got to pick what she wanted to take home. :001_smile:

[elise1mds]

*sigh* I feel your pain. My mom called me one day before Christmas and said, "Honey, rye flour is on sale. I won't use a whole bag, but I'll send you half."

 

Then the other week it was "Wal-Mart has bathroom towels on sale. Last time I was over I noticed that some of your towels were fraying. I'm getting you a set and sending it up."

 

She also sends me Dear Abby articles that she thinks will be relevant to my child-rearing "efforts" that aren't good enough for her and books that she finds in garage sales that she thinks might have a good "moral." And then she made a pair of red corduroy overalls for my daughter (who very, very rarely wears red) that are SO wide in the legs that you could stick a second child in there. My son calls them her oompa-loompa pants.

 

However... despite all that... slightly slutty sticker books DO take the cake! :)

[Aubrey]

*sigh* I feel your pain. My mom called me one day before Christmas and said, "Honey, rye flour is on sale. I won't use a whole bag, but I'll send you half."

 

Then the other week it was "Wal-Mart has bathroom towels on sale. Last time I was over I noticed that some of your towels were fraying. I'm getting you a set and sending it up."

 

She also sends me Dear Abby articles that she thinks will be relevant to my child-rearing "efforts" that aren't good enough for her and books that she finds in garage sales that she thinks might have a good "moral." And then she made a pair of red corduroy overalls for my daughter (who very, very rarely wears red) that are SO wide in the legs that you could stick a second child in there. My son calls them her oompa-loompa pants.

 

However... despite all that... slightly slutty sticker books DO take the cake! :)

 

Alright, I'll give you the rye flour, but the rest of it sounds sweet. I'd love new towels. And the oompa-loompa pants my mom made for dd w/ the matching tops off of a pattern from the 70s--my absolute favorite. I wish she'd quit college & sew for my kids all the time.

 

Sometimes.

 

There are the times she feels guilty about not sewing for the boys. And then tries to.

 

I didn't mention the shirts she sent in said box. She made them for ds9 when he was a baby, but she doesn't know how to make the collars stretchy. :lol: They wouldn't go over his head.

 

She finally finished "fixing" them & thought maybe they'd fit ds1. If not? She says to give them away. (Like they'd go over some other baby's head.)

 

Actually...I guess they might. Not all babies are born the size of a toddler, are they? :lol:

[Scarlett]

*sigh* I feel your pain. My mom called me one day before Christmas and said, "Honey, rye flour is on sale. I won't use a whole bag, but I'll send you half."

 

Then the other week it was "Wal-Mart has bathroom towels on sale. Last time I was over I noticed that some of your towels were fraying. I'm getting you a set and sending it up."

 

She also sends me Dear Abby articles that she thinks will be relevant to my child-rearing "efforts" that aren't good enough for her and books that she finds in garage sales that she thinks might have a good "moral." And then she made a pair of red corduroy overalls for my daughter (who very, very rarely wears red) that are SO wide in the legs that you could stick a second child in there. My son calls them her oompa-loompa pants.

 

However... despite all that... slightly slutty sticker books DO take the cake! :)

 

My MIL.....wealthy and snobbish...wait, wait....she is my EX MIL now. wow that feels good to say.....anyway, on the few times a year we would visit she would clean out her pantry and load us up with food. When we got home, I would go through it all and find that a good half of what she sent with us was expired. So into the trash much of it would go.

Wow, I don't miss those days.

 

If I loved her though...or if I thot she ever loved me....I would have tried to be more understanding and gracious.

[myfatherslily]

She reminds me of my grandma:) She likes to carefully cut the pictures off rows of free address labels and send them down for the kids. Of course, these are the stickiest of all stickers and children stick stickers everywhere...

 

I wonder if it's a carry-over from days gone by. I mean, every time I have junk mail to throw away, my DD5 asks me, "Mommy, do you have any garbage?" I'll tell her, yes, I'm throwing this junk away... why, does she want it? Her eyes light up. "Ooooh, yay! GARBAGE!!" And she giggles with delight.

 

Maybe when she's an adult, I'll be throwing away an old catalog, because I just got the latest one, and I'll think to myself, "Hmm, maybe Eliana will like this! I'll save it and sent it to her. And I'll just tuck these junk mail envelopes into the box, too, for her kids. They'll get such a kick out of that."

 

Then she'll get on her latest apple device and laugh with her friends that her mom just mailed her a year-old catalog and some garbage!:D

[Mama Anna]

There was the time that the box (she tends to use Kotex boxes covered with grocery bag paper) had something rolling around in the bottom of it - it looked to me like a lever that had unscrewed from something important. I had to email a photo back to her in order for her to find out that it was a part my dad had removed from the car while fixing it and hadn't been able to find . . .

 

There was the time I helped dd3 (then about 1.5) unwrap her Christmas present from Grandma only to find a pair of my mom's briefs involved in the tissue paper. :001_huh: (I assume they were clean. Note to self: Never wrap Christmas gifts on an unmade bed full of laundry.) :lol::lol::lol: ("No, dd, that's not your gift. I think this is.")

 

But she sends me the half-used food items. Half a bag of whole wheat flour. Five opened bags of hardened, stale twists - for the girls, of course. It really gets me that she used to pay to send boxes of expired canned meats to us. I finally managed to tell her (during pregnancy) that canned meat made me really queasy. Whew! That stopped!

 

Her latest care package gift was one of those "As Seen on TV" hair remover things - slightly used, of course - that hadn't worked for her.

 

Sometimes it really frustrates me. Other times dh and I laugh our heads off. But I must say I do feel loved - she's trying so hard to bless me . . .

 

Mama Anna

[rosehaven]

mine gave me "Big White Undies" in my box this Christmas......

 

Every year.......gotta love Mom.

 

Blessings

[FlockOfSillies]

:smilielol5:Oh, it hurts! It hurts! I'm gonna wake up my dh! :lol:

[Amber in AUS]

This has been the funniest thread i have read in a long time!! Thankyou for brightening my afternoon :D

[IsabelC]

Some of those are hilarious. I guess at least it's nice that they care enough to send a box in the first place. Maybe one solution would be to provide her with a 'wish list' she can pick things off, then you'd get stuff you need/want/can use?

[Scarlett]

Some of those are hilarious. I guess at least it's nice that they care enough to send a box in the first place. Maybe one solution would be to provide her with a 'wish list' she can pick things off, then you'd get stuff you need/want/can use?

 

Except my mom doesn't like gift suggestions. It stiffens her spine and sucks the joy out of her gift giving .

 

About the packages we get....once when I was first married I left a pair of undies at her house over the weekend. She felt compelled to wash them and then MAIL them to me. Of course the package was too big for our apartment mail box so I had to go to the downtown post office and sign for a big package. I was so excited. Then opened package to fine my own underware.

[Hathersage]

Except my mom doesn't like gift suggestions. It stiffens her spine and sucks the joy out of her gift giving .

 

About the packages we get....once when I was first married I left a pair of undies at her house over the weekend. She felt compelled to wash them and then MAIL them to me. Of course the package was too big for our apartment mail box so I had to go to the downtown post office and sign for a big package. I was so excited. Then opened package to fine my own underware.

 

My MIL did that to her son. While he was in the Army. And everyone was standing around to see what she had sent in the care package.

[Aubrey]

She reminds me of my grandma:) She likes to carefully cut the pictures off rows of free address labels and send them down for the kids.

 

She sent these in the box, too! How did you know?

 

When we moved last yr, Mom came down & helped. While she was here, she helped me sort thr the kids' school supplies & art supplies--some of which are left (unopened) fr when I was a kid. (When we come across the ones from when MOM was a kid, dh says Ghandi would be proud.)

 

When she saw how much *junk* we've got, she said, "Gee, Aubrey, I don't think you should buy any more school/art supplies for a while."

 

I haven't. MOM. :glare: :lol:

[Aubrey]

Her latest care package gift was one of those "As Seen on TV" hair remover things - slightly used, of course - that hadn't worked for her.

 

Were y'all looking in my box? Yep, this was in it, too. :lol:

[Aubrey]

Some of those are hilarious. I guess at least it's nice that they care enough to send a box in the first place. Maybe one solution would be to provide her with a 'wish list' she can pick things off, then you'd get stuff you need/want/can use?

 

No, because she doesn't shop at Target or Amazon. She shops at Ross, Big Lots, & other places where there's really no telling what will be on the shelves.

[Aubrey]

About the packages we get....once when I was first married I left a pair of undies at her house over the weekend. She felt compelled to wash them and then MAIL them to me. Of course the package was too big for our apartment mail box so I had to go to the downtown post office and sign for a big package. I was so excited. Then opened package to fine my own underware.

 

My grandmother does this! :lol: So far, we've never left underwear behind, lol!