Help me help my sister? And my ps nephew.

[TN Mama]

I'd love to hear some opinions on this situation.

 

Background: My nephew is a young 5 (mid-Sept bday), but very bright. Instead of holding him back a year they opted to send him to a small, private school. Another year of preschool would be wasted on this child. Several weeks ago the K teacher sent a note home to my sister saying her son was having trouble finishing his work at school and how would she like it handled. Sister asked if work could be sent home. By work I mean coloring sheets. M does not like coloring, so he drags it out. Coloring sheets sometimes come home, sister makes M do them & they are returned to school.

 

So today another note comes home. M had to change his card because he wasn't getting his work done. His seat has been moved away from other students. Sister e-mailed the teacher to ask if M was being disruptive. No, just not doing his work. He told the teacher he didn't like to color & she told him he needs to do what is asked. The teacher asked my sister for ideas on how to motivate M to get his "work" completed.

 

My nephew and my oldest are exactly alike. Both bright, both in trouble in school for not completing coloring pages, both overly emotional kids. More often than not when my sister calls, I can honestly say that I've been there. But I just don't know what to tell her. Any words of advice? Anyone btdt?

[Julie in Austin]

I think a child in a school setting needs to learn that s/he will be asked to do things s/he doesn't like. Perhaps she can help him with coping strategies, such as encouraging him to make up stories in his head while he colors to make it less boring.

[MeanestMomInMidwest]

I will never understand why coloring is such a big deal in Kindergarten. My oldest went to PS K and we had this very same issue. The problem? DS did not like the smell of crayons. He also said he did not like the way the crayons made his hands feel after he colored :confused:. It was a rough year, and the one that started me on my eventual road to homeschooling.

 

To this day that son does not like to color. at. all. But he will do it now, with colored pencils.

 

BTW, he also can't abide the smell of play-dough. Poor kid didn't stand a chance in K having a sensory aversion to both crayons & play-dough!

 

Good luck to your sister.

[Melinda in VT]

My first thought was to put the poor kid in a school that doesn't focus on coloring worksheets. :lol: (And I know they exist because I've sent kids to two of them.)

 

Maybe you should go with Julie's more practical suggestions.:001_smile:

[LibraryLover]

Sounds like letting him stay in preschool would not have been wasted. Unless it was as lame as this K.

[In The Great White North]

My first thought was to put the poor kid in a school that doesn't focus on coloring worksheets. :lol: (And I know they exist because I've sent kids to two of them.)

 

:iagree:

[Miss Marple]

All my boys hate to color. They could color well when forced. However they like to draw and doodle. In all these years I have yet to find any real redeeming reason to insist that a young child color a page. I think it's a great time filler for most classes. Unfortunately there are those kids who don't do well with "time fillers".

[TN Mama]

I think a child in a school setting needs to learn that s/he will be asked to do things s/he doesn't like. Perhaps she can help him with coping strategies, such as encouraging him to make up stories in his head while he colors to make it less boring.

 

I don't disagree and I like the idea of the stories.

 

My youngest daughter would rather do anything than complete a coloring page. She prefers a blank piece of paper where she can create.

[Plucky]

My older two hated coloring. One went to kindergarten, she was the only kid that could read and outread everyone, yet she frustrated her teacher because she would take one crayong and scribble all over the page because she was having none of it. She was talked to by her teacher, but in the end the teacher did not make a fuss over it. What is up with coloring??? Is it really a required kindergarten skill? I think not.

[teamturner]

Perhaps the K teachers believe coloring is a good pre-writing activity that builds fine motor skills. I find that cutting with scissors is better for that, but that would be a whole lot messier for a teacher in a classroom.

[Sputterduck]

I will never understand why coloring is such a big deal in Kindergarten. My oldest went to PS K and we had this very same issue. The problem? DS did not like the smell of crayons. He also said he did not like the way the crayons made his hands feel after he colored :confused:. It was a rough year, and the one that started me on my eventual road to homeschooling.

 

To this day that son does not like to color. at. all. But he will do it now, with colored pencils.

 

BTW, he also can't abide the smell of play-dough. Poor kid didn't stand a chance in K having a sensory aversion to both crayons & play-dough!

 

Good luck to your sister.

 

 

I totally agree with your kid. Crayons and play-dough stink terribly and they make your fingers feel nasty. I thought I was the only one. lol

[Joanne]

I'd pull him out and engage with him in other ways.

[myfunnybunch]

In your sister's shoes, I would first see if the teacher is willing to compromise. Following directions is an important skill, but so is compromise. Coloring is not. Better to engage a child in a lesson ways that are meaningful to the child (which is her job) than to insist on rote direction-following. Would she be willing to let him draw a picture instead, for example, or do some copywork related to the lesson? My now 8 y.o. was a kinder who h-a-t-e-d to color, he thought it was pointless, but he would happily draw or write.

 

How I handled the situation from there would depend on the teacher's reaction to my suggestions for compromise.

 

Cat

[lgm]

BTDT....Boring...

 

this is a lazy k teacher or a school that's cheaping out. There are many ways to run K, but the sitting down and coloring every day thing is old. Bores the kids out of their heads by Oct usually and they have 8 months left to go. Switch him to a section with an energetic teacher who has a bigger bag of tricks. Look for someone that has a variety of activities that engage all senses to practice fine motor skills. There should be sand tracing,theme projects, clay, finger painting, fat markers, playdough, coins, lego or snap blocks...

 

 

Now, if stuck in situation, teach kid how to color quickly, put shadows in, and how to insert textures. The teacher will be ticked off because she's planning on wasting about 45 minutes with this, but she'll eventually let him go read a book in peace.

Edited November 10, 2009 by lgm

[angela in ohio]

I think a child in a school setting needs to learn that s/he will be asked to do things s/he doesn't like. Perhaps she can help him with coping strategies, such as encouraging him to make up stories in his head while he colors to make it less boring.

 

:iagree:

 

Unless she is willing to pull him out, he should be expected to do what is done in class.

 

ETA: Coloring is an important skill. It teaches fine motor control and is a great pre-writing activity. I think we all are jumping to a lot of conclusions about the teacher (lazy, coloring all day, etc.) Coloring is a normal part of a kindergarten experience.

Edited November 10, 2009 by angela in ohio

[Harriet Vane]

Now, if stuck in situation, teach kid how to color quickly, put shadows in, and how to insert textures. The teacher will be ticked off because she's planning on wasting about 45 minutes with this, but she'll eventually let him go read a book in peace.

 

I like this suggestion. Another idea is to outline the picture first, really dark, then shade in the rest. I also like the idea of asking teacher to offer blank paper for those who would like to draw something related to the story.

 

I would challenge the teacher a little bit on the purpose of the coloring too. Is this really the best educational activity she can come up with? Is the coloring for the sake of coloring, or is it meant to be a response to something they have learned? If it's for the sake of coloring, WHY??? If the purpose is to respond to something that the class learned, then allowing the kids blank paper to cartoon a response or draw their own picture would certainly fit the bill.

 

If the teacher is hung up on making everyone follow the directions no matter what then nephew will have to learn to do so. Exercising his creativity with different techniques may be the only way to survive.

 

My own two kids have never enjoyed coloring that much, but they do like all kinds of other artistic activity.

[SapphireStitch]

I'd pull him out and engage with him in other ways.

 

:iagree::iagree::iagree:

 

I'd also suggest she read The Trouble With Boys by Peg Tyre. This may not be an instance of the teacher having a specific bias against boys, or being clueless about how to teach them. But it could be, and since this little boy seems resistant to typical school busywork, she needs to prepare herself to deal with this if she keeps him in school.

 

BTW, I have a son who loves to color and a daughter who hated it. I don't want to give the impression I think coloring is a girlie thing and all boys hate it.

[NorthwestMom]

I notice you say he is very bright. He might feel bored and underchallenged in this class. Can your sister meet with the teacher and ask for more challenging material? This progression - bored, underachieving, restless, acting out - is very common in young, gifted children.

[SonshineLearner]

Get a special set of Beeswax crayons? (available at sites like Waldorf and Montesorri) Much better for people who like "real". Ask the teacher if son can practice "writing" on the sheet.(if he's ready) Also, make sure that he is obeying and that THAT isn't the real frustration of the teacher.

 

Carrie

[nova147]

I notice you say he is very bright. He might feel bored and underchallenged in this class. Can your sister meet with the teacher and ask for more challenging material? This progression - bored, underachieving, restless, acting out - is very common in young, gifted children.

 

 

:iagree: The teacher needs to be aware that this child's behavior is likely due to boredom, not a desire to be disobedient. Certainly, he should do as he is expected, but I suspect if he were to be challenged somewhat during the school day, he'd be less resistant to coloring.

 

Another possibility -- how are his fine motor skills? Is coloring/writing difficult for him? Given that he's a young 5 year old, his fine motor skills

may not be well developed, especially compared to some of the older children in his class who may have already turned 6. If he is noticing that other kids are better at this than he is, he might be refusing because he feels inadequate -- especially if he recognizes that he is intellectually advanced (and gifted kids are often aware of this, even at early ages).

[Tidbits of Learning]

I agree that you would expect your child to do what is asked of them at school. However, having had a boy in public school k last year. It was a nightmare. He hated to color. They had a ridiculous amount of sheets that required them to color in the picture that began with /s/ sound and such. My son hated to color and preferred to circle them. This was unacceptable b/c it took only a few minutes for him to finish his work.

It seemed all the texts and printouts they had required heavy coloring of the concept. Even though my son showed he knew the concept it was trying to teach, they couldn't say he had finished his work by circling.

It was not a good year. My son missed recesses and play time b/c he wouldn't color.

The teachers are required to teach what they are told. All of the kindergarten teachers here have to teach the same things. Some may do it with more flair but in the end the kids have to do the same work no matter what teacher they receive.

[DarlaS]

As far as I know, kindergarten is optional. Just throwing that out there in case pulling him is a possibility. He can still go on to first grade.

 

If he stays and this trend continues, she should expect them to tell her he needs to repeat K (and have a plan in place for dealing with that--like telling them to stuff it :D).

 

None of my kids enjoyed coloring unless it's fairly complex (and with colored pencils).

[lgm]

I would challenge the teacher a little bit on the purpose of the coloring too. Is this really the best educational activity she can come up with? Is the coloring for the sake of coloring, or is it meant to be a response to something they have learned? If it's for the sake of coloring, WHY??? If the purpose is to respond to something that the class learned, then allowing the kids blank paper to cartoon a response or draw their own picture would certainly fit the bill.

 

If the teacher is hung up on making everyone follow the directions no matter what then nephew will have to learn to do so. Exercising his creativity with different techniques may be the only way to survive.

 

I was told the point of coloring so much (45 min per day, every day):

1) build up finger strength

2) learn to sight read the color words

3) figure out how to share crayons without fighting and wait patiently

 

With second son, the energetic younger teacher had many more ideas in her bag of tricks to engage children. She was able to use a lot more senses and did not end up with children who didn't learn the objectives or insist on throwing crayons across the room to pass them only to cliquemates. With first kiddo (who could read) we ended up showing him a new crayon technique each week and teaching him phonics so he could survive mentally.

[Dawn in OH]

As far as I know, kindergarten is optional. Just throwing that out there in case pulling him is a possibility. He can still go on to first grade.

 

 

 

Actually, Kindergarten is no longer optional in some states, although parents may request a waiver of the requirement.

 

Yes, children should be expected to do as their teacher instructs them, but at the same time, the teachers requests should be reasonable. Some kids don't like to color, either it's boring or they don't like the smell or feel of crayons. All of which are reasonable objections. (They do leave your hands sticky and the smell is obnoxious).

 

My oldest son didn't like to color more than 1 picture per day. Being homeschooled, he wasn't forced to sit and color. I can't imagine insisting a child color and complaining to parents that he didn't finish "work" that consisted of coloring pages.

 

I guess the first thing to do would be find out WHY he doesn't do the work, and then work from there. If it's boring, work out a "deal" with the child to just get the work done and get through Kindergarten. If it's the smell, try different crayons. If it's the sticky hands, see if you can get the teacher to allow hand washing afterwards. The teacher is going to have to show some flexibility though, which I would expect of anyone dealing with 5 year olds.

 

I'm guessing since you came here asking for advice that homeschooling is out of the question.

[tex-mex]

I'd love to hear some opinions on this situation.

 

Background: My nephew is a young 5 (mid-Sept bday), but very bright. Instead of holding him back a year they opted to send him to a small, private school. Another year of preschool would be wasted on this child. Several weeks ago the K teacher sent a note home to my sister saying her son was having trouble finishing his work at school and how would she like it handled. Sister asked if work could be sent home. By work I mean coloring sheets. M does not like coloring, so he drags it out. Coloring sheets sometimes come home, sister makes M do them & they are returned to school.

 

So today another note comes home. M had to change his card because he wasn't getting his work done. His seat has been moved away from other students. Sister e-mailed the teacher to ask if M was being disruptive. No, just not doing his work. He told the teacher he didn't like to color & she told him he needs to do what is asked. The teacher asked my sister for ideas on how to motivate M to get his "work" completed.

 

My nephew and my oldest are exactly alike. Both bright, both in trouble in school for not completing coloring pages, both overly emotional kids. More often than not when my sister calls, I can honestly say that I've been there. But I just don't know what to tell her. Any words of advice? Anyone btdt?

 

Let the coloring homework be a clue as to what to expect for 1st grade. Busy work. I suspect he may be asked to "stay" in K grade if this pattern continues. (Very common for boys and the holding a pencil or crayon is a BIG deal and developmentally delayed skill for most boys -- I taught K grades) Sounds like a bright boy who may have some aversion to being on task in the eye of the teacher? Is there another school that may fit his learning style?

[elw_miller]

I think a child in a school setting needs to learn that s/he will be asked to do things s/he doesn't like. Perhaps she can help him with coping strategies, such as encouraging him to make up stories in his head while he colors to make it less boring.

 

I like this idea. Sometimes I got lost in my stories, though, and the assignment still took longer than it was 'supposed' to take! :lol:

 

Can he color it creatively? Can the clouds be silver and pink and purple because of a sunset he created in the background? Can the clown's shirt have stripes and polka dots even if the lines and circles aren't provided? Can he add his own drawings to the provided one?

 

I preferred blank paper to coloring books as a kid. Perhaps he could color on the back whatever he wanted if he completed the required work 'correctly' and quickly.

[s.z.ichigo]

Coloring can be a monotonous chore when one doesn't really care about the results. Mine went through an anti-coloring period as well. Might she suggest filling the spaces with little circles or swirly lines or stripes or something else, rather than a single color? If the results are visually interesting, he may be more keen to finish the pages.

[LibraryLover]

Actually, Kindergarten is no longer optional in some states, although parents may request a waiver of the requirement.

 

There is a school an age 'requirement' in some states, but I just did a search & K is not 'required' in any state, according to my research.

 

While some states 'require' certain things, homeschooling is legal in every state in our union. Public school attendance, in K, or any grade, is not mandatory in any state.

[Dawn in OH]

While some states 'require' certain things, homeschooling is legal in every state in our union. Public school attendance, in K, or any grade, is not mandatory in any state.

 

I'm not trying to argue, but Ohio and several other states require children to attend Kindergarten now. You can of course avoid this by choosing to homeschool because homeschooling is legal in every state.

http://www.cga.ct.gov/2000/rpt/olr/htm/2000-r-0565.htm

[LibraryLover]

I'm not trying to argue, but Ohio and several other states require children to attend Kindergarten now. You can of course avoid this by choosing to homeschool because homeschooling is legal in every state.

http://www.cga.ct.gov/2000/rpt/olr/htm/2000-r-0565.htm

 

It's required as vaccinces are required. One has choices.

[Tidbits of Learning]

I beg to differ with the state list. I live in one of the states the list says require kindergarten. Nope, not true. Our state requires that a child attend school by the age of 7. They do have kindergarten available in all schools but your child is not required to attend kindergarten. You can wait and have your child tested in at 6 or 7 to 1st or 2nd grade . Only at the age of 7 do you have to notify the state if you are homeschooling and not going to attend public or private school. You don't have to notify the school of anything if your child has never attended.

Edited November 11, 2009 by OpenMinded

[LibraryLover]

I beg to differ with the state list. I live in one of the states the list says require kindergarten. Nope, not true. Our state requires that a child attend school by the age of 7. They do have it available in all schools but your child is not required to attend kindergarten. You can wait and have your child tested in at 6 or 7. Only at the age of 7 do you have to notify the state if you are homeschooling and not going to attend public or private school. You don't have to notify the school of anything if your child has never attended.

 

 

Exactly.

[Joanne]

Oh, I'll just say it. Expecting every kid to "color" happily or at length is stupid.

 

Yes, stupid.

 

Require kindness, keeping your hands to yourself, courtesy and obedience for things that matter, not for its own sake over things like coloring. If we start expecting obedience for superficialities, how meaningful is that? Really?

 

If fine motor skills are an issue, find other ways for the non color-er to build those skills.

 

Is there REALLY intrinsic value in making sure a Ker male student *colors*?

 

My 2 males managed to learn to read, write and do math with a bare minimum of coloring.

[Joker]

I have never made my dd's "color" within the lines and I never will. It seems so ridiculous. They can follow directions and they know how to color but they would be bored to tears if they were forced. They both went to kindergarten but I made it clear as soon as coloring became part of the everyday that it was not going to be pushed in this house. I just don't get it. They like to create on blank paper - every now and then they'll want to color something but it is rare. I don't understand forcing a child to color. I would talk to the teacher and try to find an alternative to your nephew having to color everything. I understand those that say he needs to learn to follow directions but this could set him up to hate school and learning. Hope things work out!

[tonygirl]

If the coloring is for the sake of following directions it can be made fun. There are lots of scholastic books "Following the Directions and Learn. Then you can still work on following directions and fine motor but in a bunch of different ways not just coloring. and you can always work in sharing and getting along. JMO

[angela in ohio]

I'm not trying to argue, but Ohio and several other states require children to attend Kindergarten now. You can of course avoid this by choosing to homeschool because homeschooling is legal in every state.

http://www.cga.ct.gov/2000/rpt/olr/htm/2000-r-0565.htm

 

Kindergarten is technically required as a prerequisite for first grade in Ohio. It is up to each school whether to allow a student to enter first grade without it, though. A child who had bee homeschooled for kindergarten could legally be refused entry into first grade and put into kindergarten instead, although common sense would hopefully take care of that.