How is your 8th grader’s self confidence? I would generally say each sibling should be given the offer to go, but since your 8th grader was asked first and this could potentially help him get a boost with his confidence, I would want to better understand his self confidence feelings first before offering to 7th grader. Like SKL, I would not put that back on my 8th grader bc in my kids’ dynamic, they would go along to get along.

So thankful the tests came back mostly positive. Praying for a quick recovery!

I’m so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful testament of her life you shared. Holding you and yours in my prayers.

You are in grief and it’s more mental labor trying to plan a meal after your dad’s service. Give yourself some grace. Order enough Chinese food that fits within your budget as that was your dad’s favorite and is a special way to honor him. Don’t stress about getting the numbers right. Many times, people won’t stay for visiting after or they will have just eaten or will be sad and not hungry or have dietary restrictions. We’ve never expected to be fed after a service and we wouldn’t be disappointed. I’m sure you have multiple drive throughs people can hit after they leave if they need more food than what’s served.

If I was working with urgency, 6 weeks and I would be working 24/7 between my full time job and house work after hours. I would want my house fully decluttered and at a minimum a couple of things refreshed. We aren’t minimalists and we’ve made a couple of good declutters in the past. ideal would be 3 months - decluttering, a couple of bigger projects that I would need to bring in trades for and the refresh items. This would bring us top dollar. This would give enough lead time for the trades I would need (even with backlog) I don’t see us aging in place here, we don’t want to move a bunch of stuff “one day” and we don’t want our kids to inherit a bunch of stuff they don’t care about to declutter. We moved a lot growing up so getting a house ready to sell isn’t foreign to me.

Welcome, my child 😂

I don’t plan on reading it, I can only imagine the depths of grief, trauma and betrayal. I’m sure it’s heartbreaking. However, in my very humble opinion, pleading for privacy and doing media interviews and writing a book exposing your family which you know the family will not refute anything you decide to say, is not a book I’d like to invest time in reading.

Praying for peace and comforting memories today.

Is this a JAWM? I’m not asking to be snarky, I am asking before giving my answer / opinion if it’s not JAWM 😊

Praying

Sending prayers for safe travel, wisdom for the doctors and 100% healing for your daughter.

No advice but thank God this young man has kind people like your son and you willing to offer him a safe place to stay in the middle of this.

I’m so sorry, Dawn. I’m holding you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

I’ve consistently been following this praying they would catch the evil person who did this. Just so horrific 😭

Maybe she needs the light on to ensure no brownies are being smuggled to those being punished?

Do you need to “get to the bottom of the job thing” to pursue the fact that he moved 4 hours away without any notification / decision making involving you? Because if not, is it really worth the energy investment to chase those answers down while you are working through how you will navigate seeing your kids within the visitation schedule given the challenges in logistics? Maybe I’m missing the obvious, but working on getting to the bottom of the job thing feels like a decoy chase he is sending you on distracting you from where you need to focus in YOUR best interests.

We have a lab/shepherd/retriever/Norwegian Elkhound mix rescue. He is the most amazing dog and we are constantly told unsolicited he’s the best dog they’ve ever seen. Rarely barks, loves animals and people, smart and wants to please us. Dream dog! So glad you’re having a great experience with your new fur baby!

(Kidshappen) sending you lots of hugs. My DH has also had employment issues with layoffs and it is heartbreaking all around. One idea that hasn’t been mentioned, please consider calling your mortgage company and asking if they have any Covid relief programs available. My friend stayed in their house by getting their mortgage payments deferred for 6 months. It gets added on to the end of the mortgage term, but zero additional fees. It sounds like you may have to choose between healthcare and mortgage and if you could pause your mortgage, that would be a huge help.

I’ve been following along and want to also encourage you to formally push back on the move and the associated hard ship costs for you to see your kids, for three reasons. 1. HE needs to know even when it may cost you in the short term, you will fight for your rights with your kids and he can’t set a precedent with making big unilateral decisions like this. 2. Your kids need to see you are doing everything possible to solution it 3. You do NOT want to set yourself up for him to come back and require you to pay him because you didn’t take the kids when you were supposed to and his living expenses for the kids have thus gone up. I'm sure you are tired of running toward a concrete wall with no helmet. I’m sure you are tired overall. But everyone that has commented agrees - this very big move was a very big no no. Don’t add noise with additional items like the morality clause, they married, that’s in the rear view mirror. Stay laser focused on this big bad thing.

That was a really bold and inconsiderate move, gifting a shirt her son was immediately obsessed with 🤣! And boom, a new gifting tradition is born!

A really nice juicer?

@lmrich he was in the ER today and I’m going to text our PA tomorrow to ask if she wants to see him once he’s home, It sounds like so far the fever and aches have bothered him the most rather than fatigue, but maybe he’s been sleeping except for finals. I’ve never heard of vomiting with mono!

Thanks, everyone. I can’t wait to see him tomorrow and get a better read on him. He’s been slogging through finals this last week, praying he did okay and we can keep him focused on rest and being as recovered as possible for spring semester.

Oldest has been really sick this week and based on symptoms, I was SURE it was flu. Fever, body aches, fatigue, sore throat and he vomited Wednesday morning. He’s coming home from college tomorrow (someone else is driving him). Today his gut was telling him it wasn’t flu, he vomited twice more this morning and he was very dizzy. Went to the ER, Covid and flu were negative. They ran blood work, start him on iv, and after an hour on iv, they send him off. Followed up shortly after that he has mono. Soooo what does it look like when he’s home? Can he lounge around the house or does he need to be isolated? Can he go out if he feels up to it? Can he see family for Christmas? Any tips are appreciated. This is a plot twist!

There’s a duality that may be important to acknowledge: you feel you are in a healthy place right now to take a step back in regular therapy sessions AND you have other financial priorities that have bubbled up - thanks to your growth and development strides, you need to prioritize putting dollars to those things - for right now, but maybe not forever. For me personally, I would keep my next standing appointment and would use it for a close out and strategy session: what are things you can do for self care during times of stress / happy stress time such as DD’s engagement, etc. What things should you look out for / unhealthy patterns you don’t want to fall back into, etc. If you have a way of emailing her ahead of the session, I would email what you have shared here and how you would like to use the time for your next appointment / last appointment in this way. That way, you both have time to process “the plan”.