I also agree with not setting her up to lie. DH and I are big on that. When you hate something so much- chances are, you will over react, and you might even attract it. If instead of hating it (and at least just hate the lie, not the liar), you could find some compassion for the child who is compulsively driven to lie, and towards sweets. Some empathy for her situation, her immature developing character. I am always wary of anything I hate so much- I don't like to hate- and I think it is too strong a word for such a thing. It feels righteous to hate what is "wrong" such as a lie, but I don't think it is necessarily kind or compassionate or useful in the big scheme of things. I wouldn't let it spoil your weekend with her, at all. It really is small fry- a kid eating sweets? I would allow some space for expecting that sort of thing- though not condoning it. It's not worth upsetting yourself, or your newly built sweet connection with her. Forgive her for trying to cover up to try to protect herself from your anger. If you do explode sometimes, its natural a kid would learn to lie to try to protect themselves from that- it's intense on a child's nervous system. And they can't help wanting what they want- and most adults cant control their compulsiveness, let alone an 11yo. Its not that you condone it, but you have to forgive it. And forgive yourself for exploding too, and move on.

The no s diet has given me back a guilt free enjoyment of food. Even if I fall off the very easy to live by wagon, its not such a big deal to get back on. I don't count calories or measure food- that is what made me food pbsessive, although it has its place. Thats what has worked for me- I guess we all find our way with this issue.

neither? My first showed no signs of needing either. My 2nd was a very fussy baby- I bought a pacifier for him- and then joined an attachment parenting group who were against pacifiers. Whether I would listen to them now, I don't know- but I did listen at the time and ditched the pacifier. He didn't appear to miss it nor did he revert to his thumb, but he hadn't had the pacifier (we call them dummies here) long and he was still only 4 months old. I was a kind of obsessive attachment tandem breastfeeder :) I think I spent a LOT of time with them attached to me :) I am sure that a fair amount of oral fixation was satisfied with breastfeeding on demand- which was a LOT in my son's case. They both weaned themselves at ages 3.5 and 5, together- I suspect that much access to breast kept them from needing a substitute. (of course, it could be just coincidence).

Oh. my. goodness.

My son has said the same to me this year now that he is year 10 at school after homeschooling for 7.5 years. He told me he feels he learns more at school. Truthfully, I am happy and not too surprised- and nor do I totally believe him! For starters- he wouldn't work for me very well at home. He didn't feel motivated and he would always be trying to get out of work- lots of resistance. He was not a diligent student for me but he also had difficulties- LDs- which we largely overcame after years of hard work on my part! So he turned up to school able to read at an adult level and able to write essays. He knew reams of history and it's his best subject at school. I take some credit for the fact he IS doing ok at school- and he's not doing so brilliantly in the areas he really struggled with at home- maths and science- but he is not a maths/science kid. And who would have thought he would be a literate kid when he was so dyslexic and late blooming! I know he is getting a lot out of class discussions (because he has a high verbal intelligence, if there is such a thing!), and from having different teachers with their different personalities- especially the men. The structure of school is suiting him more than homeschooling, even though I was structured. He needed more. AND he has stopped reading for pleasure. He probably doesn't count that as "learning" any more. He would read a LOT each day with homeschooling (and he loved it) but at school, he can get away without reading much at all. So when he says he is learning more at school- I don't necessarily believe it- its just that he has more worksheets to prove it- and he is learning things that are new to him. All the history and literature he has read is in his brain somewhere, and it has helped him form who he is- even if he doesn't recognise it yet. But when he tells me I just smile and nod and I say I am so glad he is learning and I hope he does well so he can fulfil his dreams in life.

What Negin said :) If you google "Ayurveda constututional types " or "kapha pitta vata" I am sure you will come up with the basic concepts, too.

I think one of the difficult things with homeschooling is being able to evaluate progress without necessarily have al ot of physical evidence for it. My son didnt like hands on, projects, art, colouring, and he really hated writing. So, he did a certain amount of copywork/narration/dictation each day, and that was it apart from his own play, in terms of "production". The rest was oral, reading, discussions etc. There wasn't a lot to show for it- but there was progress, slow as it was. Production, projects etc make you feel you are doing a good job because you can look around and there is the evidence- but if you have to pull teeth to get it, especially if its supposed to be fun! (and would be to a different kid,including many girls), I am not sure it's worth it. Working through a curriculum feels good because you can tick boxes and feel you are getting somewhere- and its ok to homeschool like that too- but I am a bit of a skipper- if I felt it was busywork, we skipped it. If it was a creative project and he didn't want to do it- we skipped it. I didn't skip our foundational work each day, but if all we did with SOTW was read and discuss, at least we enjoyed it thoroughly (and we did do other things over the years but not every time.) The whole productivity thing is a bit of a trap- its great to show grandparents that you are actually doing something, but its not necessary to have boxes of art pieces and projects. Learn to trust yourself.

I soak my oatmeal over night, but just in water or water with a tsp of yoghurt in it for the healthy bacteria- I don't use quickoats although dh always has them around because he likes to make porridge before bedtime. I add a tsp of ghee or coconut oil, a pinch of sea salt, and I like either organic sultanas or goji berries, although I leave it out if I am making for the kids- they don't like them. I add milk for cooking in the morning- i dont like microwaves- I cook on the stove but it doesnt take long when its been soaked. A touch of cinnamon and/or cardamon. Maple syrup is a special treat (especially down here) but I might use golden syrup or agave syrup. Blueberries and/or bananas. Yum! Autumn here- time to get out the oats.

It sounds like you are being scammed- 60 hours of cleaning is ridiculous. You could call their bluff and get your own lawyer. I guess if you need a reference its even tricker? We have never had that problem and we have always rented- but we have always employed cleaners once we moved out, to finish off after we have done a basic clean- we would never leave that to a real estate agent. It's too open to abuse.

I really think it is also a personality thing and for some kids, organisation comes easier than for others. For some kids, the mess just doesn't bother them, either. Some kids need a lot of help and patience to keep their space clean. I hadnt quite discovered Flylady when my kids were that age, but by the time they were a bit older I had, and she really helped me develop a good attitude to cleaning, and not to let kids rooms become a big issue. flylady.net

I cant see any reason why you couldn't if, as others have said, you left the place in as good a condition as you found it. Perhaps it would be a courtesy to the landlord, to let them know you will be taking some of your precious plants so they don't try to rent it as it is, before you take them. However, I wouldn't personally take plants like that. We rent and I have made 2 vegetable gardens which I will leave (probably - I guess I might take the limestone bricks that border the gardens, but I doubt it). I simply don't plant plants in the garden- I use pots. I have a great herb collection, in large pots. We have a tropical plant collection at the front- in pots. WE have a beuatiful fish pond- in a ceramic pot. I guess I just learned to do vegies in the ground and everything else in pots because of our long term renting situation. I also think...it is nice to leave a place better than when you arrive there. I wouldn't be too stingy about it.

I love buskers and its great when kids busk (unless they terrible then its a bit embarrassing but I still try to give them something for their spirit!). Of course it's not begging! The world would be a poorer place without buskers.

There is a lot of good information on thyroid problems nowadays. I also am having the low ferritin issue. And if its auto immune- treating the thyroid directly, especially with iodine, can make it worse. Its really a bit complex and the lab work read by a doctor who hasn't done recent studies in thyroid, won't help much anyway. I think the product might help. I think it could be worth a try. But you might also get on the internet and do some extensive research about thyroid- gluten intolerance can be implicated in thyroid issues. There are things you can try. This is the book I read recently- I downloaded it onto my ipad.

Fresh aloe vera from the garden.

Here it is left, not right. Technically, they are meant to move over, and most people do. But if after say, 5 seconds :) they don't, I pass them anyhow I can, safely. I am a bit of a speed freak and have learned that not everyone else is- and you just never know what sort of day or life that person in that car is having- so I give them grace and pass them before I get irritated with them.

There was a point in my marriage when I read The Surrendered Wife and it was good for me at that very point. I was trying to control tooooo much. I was resentful, carrying a lot of baggage from my feminist mother and grandmother. I experimented with surrendering- not to my husband's ultimate authority, but surrendering my need to be in control all the time, and to be over reactive to my dh's desire for some control. It was a very healthy growth for me. I have read other books along those lines over the years, here and there, and there is always something in them that I can take away. However...I do not submit my authority to anyone but God (I am not Christian but I think my concept of God is similar enough for the point being made), who put his authority in my heart, and everyone's heart. I feel strongly we are meant to be our own authorities and trust ourselves- that's why we were given intelligence. I am not talking egoic authority- I am talking inner knowing. The times of patriarchal authority are gone, and the time of institutionalised thinking and trusting others to take care of us, including institutionalised religions that disempower us, are going. Meanwhile, we scramble for how to best live our lives in integrity, and I think it is possible to glean wisdom from many sources, and a lot of old fashioned wisdom is still wisdom. I just don't think we are meant to swallow anything hook line and sinker anymore- we are to use discernment and ultimately, to take complete responsibility for ourselves, not blame anyone else.

I said half an hour because I would invite them about half an hour before I intended to serve dinner- but chances are we would move straight to the dining room to chat and get comfortable anyway. I do not handle waiting for meals very well, either. Something in me gets kind of desperate if I dont get my meal when I expect it- I think its a blood sugar thing. We eat dinner somewhere between 5.30 and 6.30 so by 8 I would be ready to eat the tablecloth.

I left home at 16 and never went back. I see my parents once every 2-3 years and have done my whole adult life. Its been hard on my mum. A lot of those early years, I didn't even talk to her much- we didn't get on. By the time I had kids in my late 20s, we had re-conciliated. I had settled on the other side of the country, though, and had my kids here- so its never been easy to spend much time together. But now- I do stay in touch. I really think it means a lot to just stay in touch regularly. I send my mum prayers for her wellbeing because she isn't well. I try to remember her every day and just send her love. ANd we email or phone maybe a couple of times a month. I feel we are in touch and we love each other. Your son is at the beginning of the large adventure of life- the stage when all things are possible and life is exciting. YOu are his foundation- from which he can fly. I think its natural for young adults to take their parents for granted even if they love them deeply. Phoning each week is a lot- he wants to stay in touch. I woudl focus more on the connection and its quality, and your love for him and desire for him to fly in his life, rather than your need for physical contact. Or, you could jsut say one day- I would love to give you a big hug, I wonder when you might visit us? Without putting too much on him. My stepdd23 doesnt see us and she lives a 15 minute drive away. She and dh clash and she is finding her independence from him- he is a bit controlling. It just seems to be those years when kids really need to find themselves and being away form parents can be a part of that.

Mostly opposite and we know it. However, what is similar is a passion for our spirituality and our family- otherwise we would be extremely incompatible.

It is scary, I know. When ds was 1 year old and sleeping with me, I woke to someone with a flashlight in my bedroom. He grabbed my wallet from next to my bed and ran to dh's room at the other end of the hallway, where he asked dh something. Dh woke up and thought it was a friend coming to take him to golf, mumbled something, and the guy just ran out of the house. All he got was $20 from my wallet- I had taken out $100 the night before. He had got in through an open window. I couldn't be alone in the house for weeks and was truly frightened. However, we are very careful about security ever since then. Just take precautions- it is a wake up call- and support each other to get over the fear. Dont let them undermine the sanctity of your own home- just protect yourself a bit more.

Winnie the Pooh and Christopher Robin The Hobbit Famous Five and Secret Seven series- Enid Blyton The Magic Faraway Tree series- Enid Blyton The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe The Phantom Tollbooth Charlottes Web The Nargun and the Stars Seven Little Australians The Waterbabies Dr Doolittle

I would use You Tube to learn. Then I would pick a small pattern such as a dishcloth. You can do knit and purl and you can get familiar with reading a pattern. Not a scarf- they are easy, but take too long to get satisfaction when you are still at the very slow stage.

Oh, where's your sense of fun? I loved the movie- I think it was meant to be ridiculous and it was light hearted and fun because of it. :lol: Not meant to be a deep and meaningful!

Dh is a bit like your mum too. It's just as likely to be me, though, as our kids. I burnt his favourite toxic teflon frypan the other day making HIM cauliflower patties- he completely flipped about a $20 frypan being burnt. The scratch on the table- I did that when I was upset with him once, not proud of it but it adds character, surely ;) He takes marks on the walls as personal affronts. Weird, but what to do. We aren't going to walk around on eggshells- we just developed thick skin towards his dramatic complaints :)

I seem to remember that I did, kolamum- I just used the basic principles- it's a low fat diet with whole foods. There are certain foods in there that are good to use regularly, such as LSA and fresh juices- that are key to the diet- and plenty of normal foods- vegetables, rice, fish, wholemeal bread, fruit etc. I would say that my normal diet is probably more limited in many ways than that diet, except I am not normally a low fat person. But I am flexible and after getting a feel for the recipes, I just wing it, keeping out the dairy etc that is restricted. I am well aware of how difficult it is to feed a family while doing a specialised diet for oneself or different family members, though- it is work. I thought this diet was relatively good in that respect, though.