If you're a nervous flyer, how do you manage trips involving air travel?

[Kidlit]

I have flown 8 times in the past 25 years or so, so I'm not exactly a newbie, but I don't do it frequently enough to become really comfortable.  I can psych myself up for it because I really like to go places, but it has almost gotten to the point that the effort to keep myself calm makes it almost not worth it.  Here are things I do:

Plan how I'll spend the flight.  I love to read but flying is not the time for me to read.  I need something in my ears because it's the sound of the engines and the landing gear, etc., that raises my anxiety the most.  I usually watch movies.  
 

Not entertain too many scary thoughts.  Don't let my mind go there. 

Take an aisle seat if possible and if not, close the window shade.  

Pay attention to the calm demeanor of the flight attendants. 

Last summer we flew to NYC and I prepped by going through some exercises on an app specifically to fear of flying, and it helped.  

I also used an app that showed the potential turbulence for flights and the time the flight would encounter turbulence.  This could actually go either way, but somehow it helped me. 
 

what do you do to help yourself?  I'll take any advice you have because we are flying to Denver in July. 
 

PLEASE NO SCARY FLYING STORIES OF ANY KIND. Thank you.  ☺️

 

[Frances]

While I don’t necessarily enjoy air travel due to the hurry up and wait nature of it and being crammed together with strangers, it is so, so much safer than traveling by car. Maybe reading about this fact and reminding yourself of it when you fly would help?

[Shoeless]

When I get anxious, I repeat to myself "Thousands of people fly every day and nothing bad happens to them". 

I don't like flying, either. 

[Guest]

I like nighttime flights because I’m tired and tired = no energy to spend worrying about the flight. Chewing gum is also a good way for me to lose some nervous energy. Other than those, perhaps meditation and a calm app. 

[bibiche]

I take Xanax.

I’m not really a nervous flyer, but I get claustrophobic when the plane is not moving. Ever since a godawful experience being stuck on the tarmac in Rome for *hours* I carry pills. They help.

[madteaparty]

38 minutes ago, bibiche said:

I take Xanax.

I’m not really a nervous flyer, but I get claustrophobic when the plane is not moving. Ever since a godawful experience being stuck on the tarmac in Rome for *hours* I carry pills. They help.

I am also not opposed to pills but Xanax was bad news for me. Such bad news. Find your poison before you set you set off.

[KSera]

Reading about how flight works helped me. Particularly helpful was learning that when traveling at speed, the air acts more like a liquid the plane is traveling on. I don’t worry about a boat not being held up by the ocean and a plane is similar in flight. Also the analogy of it being like the plane is in jello. Even when the jello jiggles, the plane is securely in the jello. Also thinking of turbulence like a bumpy road (turbulence is the thing I don’t enjoy). Before my last flight, I also ran flightaware on my computer background for the month leading up—seeing thousands of planes traveling in the air at all times was good. 

[Farrar]

I genuinely refuse to think about it until I'm on the plane. At that point, who cares. I'm locked in. I don't get panic attacks or anything, just anxious, but I can endure a couple of hours of nerves. Or a few hours of nerves if it's a long flight. 

[MEmama]

Noise cancelling head phones and favorite music, eye mask, and sleep. My superpower is that I can sleep anywhere, any time and for  just about any length of time.

Last time we came back from Dublin (early morning flight since heading west), I slept on the bus to the airport, nearly the entire flight except when they bugged me to give me food, and on the entire train ride home. We got home around 7:30 and by 8 pm I was sound asleep in bed. 🤣

Also now I always have my panic attack pills with me just in case. Flying doesn't especially bother me but I do get claustrophobic and really prefer to not think about what's happening (huh, writing that out maybe it does bother me? Idk, I prefer to ignore it best I can). 

[Amethyst]

Noise canceling headphones with music cranked up high during takeoff. 
 

Once I understood that flying through clouds would result in turbulence, it helped. I knew to expect it, and knew it would end once we got through it. 
 

I watch how calm everyone else is. Nobody seems to be clenching the armrests like me, so everything is probably fine because they must be more experienced travelers than I am. 
 

Unlike you, OP, I much prefer being able to see outside. If I feel the plane tilting, it helps me to see, ok we’re banking, no big deal. 
 

 

[Grace Hopper]

A Bloody Mary

Seriously, for a leisure trip it’s a little tradition. Not so helpful for in-flight nerve-wreckers like turbulence. Or when herding little kids. 
 

I find a really engaging novel to be a helpful distraction. 

[J-rap]

I'm pretty sure I've read that flying is safer than driving a car, so there you go.  

Also, turbulence is controlled flying and completely normal.

A glass of wine either in flight or ahead of time at the airport is fine.  Liquid courage, as they say.

[KidsHappen]

Xanax for me but if you don't have that Benadryl or Dramamine will help as well. Figure out your tolerance ahead of time and then take it once your have gotten through security. Then perhaps an audible or music to listen to. I haven't flown in so long that I am not sure if you can get internet or perhaps download something to watch on your phone or an ipad? An eye cover and one of those neck pillows along with some ear plugs might allow you to nap. I know that might seem like it's not possible but the last time I had a three and a half hour MRI (and I am very claustrophobic) I took a Xanax and used the ear plugs and eye cover and fell asleep in the machine even with the load banging. 

[Toocrazy!!]

I’m also one that finds the sheer number of planes in the air and safe flights every day comforting. It’s just so safe and the worrying about it does me no good. 
I love to read, but find watching movies with my earphones in makes the time go faster. 

[Arcadia]

23 hours ago, MEmama said:

I slept on the bus to the airport, nearly the entire flight except when they bugged me to give me food, and on the entire train ride home.

Some airplanes have a button on the seat or a card to hang which says to not wake up the passenger for food. I rarely sleep on the plane but if I managed to fall asleep, I rather not be waken up for food. 

[Toocrazy!!]

I did an 11 hour road trip a couple months ago to somewhere I had recently been flying to get to. On the way there I saw two horrible accidents, one of which I could see was fatal. The last fatality on a US commercial airline flight was 14 years ago. It is absolutely safer than driving. 

I’m not a great flyer either, but I do find once I get to the airport and see all the people and all the flights on the boards, and all the planes, it does register that this is a very normal way for people to get around, I just don’t do it often enough to get to that level of comfortable.

[QueenCat]

17 hours ago, Grace Hopper said:

A Bloody Mary

Seriously, for a leisure trip it’s a little tradition. Not so helpful for in-flight nerve-wreckers like turbulence. Or when herding little kids. 
 

I find a really engaging novel to be a helpful distraction. 

Yep... But for me, it's prosecco with a splash of cranberry juice. I'm so happy that they've started serving drinks again up front while boarding is still going on. I sip on that and start watching a show on the screen in front of me as soon as I'm settled. Although to be honest, I fly enough that I really don't get nervous about it. 

[Grace Hopper]

1 minute ago, QueenCat said:

Yep... But for me, it's prosecco with a splash of cranberry juice. I'm so happy that they've started serving drinks again up front while boarding is still going on. I sip on that and start watching a show on the screen in front of me as soon as I'm settled. Although to be honest, I fly enough that I really don't get nervous about it. 

There was a time years ago when I flew a lot - pre 9/11. I actually enjoyed it! Because when else can a busy gal have a chance to just sit still with a cocktail and no responsibilities?!

I don’t fly so much anymore but it is different than the old days. I, too, am glad that in flight drink service is back. I am very appreciative of flight attendants!

[Lady Florida.]

I don't fly much. I've flown 4 round trips in the last 30 years, the most recent in March of this year when I went to Greece. I'm a nervous flyer so I asked my doctor for something. Flying across the ocean after not having flown much in recent years was making me anxious. He prescribed xanax which helped. With dh retired we plan to travel some driving, some flying. Maybe if I start flying more I'll get over my nervousness but until then I'll gladly take something to help. I don't care much for alcohol other than a glass of wine now and then so having a pre or during flight drink isn't helpful to me.

On 5/28/2023 at 10:04 PM, Shoeless said:

I repeat to myself "Thousands of people fly every day and nothing bad happens to them". 

Yes, even with xanax I was still nervous, just less so. I try to remind myself that many planes fly people safely around the world daily. Of course with my last trip it didn't help to read about some near collisions at airports, including JFK where I had layovers both there and back. These near collisions were in the news just days before I left.