Are the Board Rules not applicable to Social Groups?

[VaKim]

The boards have been bothering me quite a bit as of late, and I intend to start using the ignore feature for these things.

 

A short trip through the social groups is a quick way to compose your ignore list. It is quite easy to tell which people just have a different worldview, and which are full of hatred and hostility and take much pleasure and glee in expressing it. I feel like I am in perpetual public high school sometimes.

[PariSarah]

The boards have been bothering me quite a bit as of late, and I intend to start using the ignore feature for these things.

 

. . . unless it seems fruitful to have a good discussion about it. I've been skipping over the vast majority of political threads for this reason.

 

But I'm not a fan of ignoring deliberate rule-breaking.

[Jugglin'5]

Honest question- Is it the words used in the examples posted, or the opinions those words express? Because, quite frankly, I fail to see the difference between Jesusland/Ignorance and true colors/must be prayed for.

 

The wording is undeniably different, but the opinions are equally clear.

 

By "true colors" I meant the mask of respect and tolerance was pulled away. It was a thin or invisible mask for some to begin with. I do not lump all atheists/agnostics/ pagans in one group. For instance, Mamalynx and PamSFSOM are two women that always try to be respectful, and don't insult people as a group, so I try to be respectful of them as well. And Pam and I disagree plenty, right Pam?

[Lovedtodeath]

Originally Posted by Lovedtodeath

And really, saying that Christians should pray for them is the nice thing to do. The intent is that Christians are thinking good thoughts about the people they are praying for. That the people in the prayers are misguided and need help and understanding.

 

Ignorant, misguided, lack of understanding... they're the same thing.

 

You do not know what I was trying to say: They need understanding in that Christians need to understand that they may have very good reasons for believing the way they do. Many "Christians" have taught things in word and action that have turned people away from the Bible. This needs to be understood by Christians.

[Book Crazy]

A short trip through the social groups is a quick way to compose your ignore list. It is quite easy to tell which people just have a different worldview, and which are full of hatred and hostility and take much pleasure and glee in expressing it. I feel like I am in perpetual public high school sometimes.

 

If I put all the people who don't have the same world view as me, 3/4 of the board would be on it.

 

In that 3/4, there are many people who spout hatred and hostility of others, just because they don't follow a certain path in life.

[PariSarah]

A short trip through the social groups is a quick way to compose your ignore list. It is quite easy to tell which people just have a different worldview, and which are full of hatred and hostility and take much pleasure and glee in expressing it. I feel like I am in perpetual public high school sometimes.

 

Well, the high school part, maybe. ;)

 

But there are people whose opinions I respect that belong to social groups whose premise I question. I'm grieved that some of them are taking the opportunity to indulge in misbehavior, but not all of them are.

 

And I'm not willing to say that membership in a group some of whose members misbehave justifies treating a person like the members who are misbehaving. Otherwise, people would think there's no difference between me and Fred Phelps. Or that there's no difference between Nadia and Osama. Or between Eliana and the people who financed Rabin's assassination. No thanks.

[Parabola]

The OP may have been asking if board rules applied to social groups as well. But the other intent of the post, was to "tell" on the particular social groups that offended her. She brought out what she found offensive and trotted it around a bit. If she really wanted to know what the rules apply, I'm sure a mod would be a better person to contact then the entire population of the gen board.

[Carrie12345]

By "true colors" I meant the mask of respect and tolerance was pulled away. It was a thin or invisible mask for some to begin with. I do not lump all atheists/agnostics/ pagans in one group. For instance' date=' Mamalynx and PamSFSOM are two women that always try to be respectful, and don't insult people as a group, so I try to be respectful of them as well. And Pam and I disagree plenty, right Pam?[/quote']

 

You're right. I was in a hurry to get an example down in case the thread was closed.

I do still stand by my point, and I promise I am not trying to defend or bash *anyone's* words. I'm just having difficulty comparing the meanings behind them. Perhaps a Venn diagram is in order. ;)

[Lovedtodeath]

The OP may have been asking if board rules applied to social groups as well. But the other intent of the post, was to "tell" on the particular social groups that offended her. She brought out what she found offensive and trotted it around a bit. If she really wanted to know what the rules apply, I'm sure a mod would be a better person to contact then the entire population of the gen board.

 

 

I am glad to have the veil pulled away by this thread. I was kidding myself, and will now breath easier about starting my use of the ignore feature.

[Cornerstone Classical]

I don't know why but the reference to "Jesusland" cracks me up tonight. "I'd like one plane ticket to Ignorance, please."

 

This quote reminds me of .....

I Corinthians 1

18For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. 19For it is written:

"I will destroy the wisdom of the wise;

the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate."[c]

 

20Where is the wise man? Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world? 21For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe. 22Jews demand miraculous signs and Greeks look for wisdom, 23but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, 24but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. 25For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength. 26Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. 27But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. 28He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, 29so that no one may boast before him. 30It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. 31Therefore, as it is written: "Let him who boasts boast in the Lord."[d] :001_smile::001_smile:

[Parabola]

I am glad to have the veil pulled away by this thread. I was kidding myself, and will now breath easier about starting my use of the ignore feature.

'Then you just go ahead and do that honey. I personally like to hear from all voices so I don't use my button.

You opened a can of worms OP, and now watch us get the groups taken away. And for once I might agree, THIS IS STUPID.

[Jenny in Florida]

So, since we're proclaiming that we're Christians, just turn the other cheek ladies, and LET IT GO.

 

For what it's worth, I'm not a Christian, and I find the posting in a public place of the kind of comments quoted extremely disheartening. It's also just plain rude, since there is every reason to think that the people being mocked might see those posts.

 

I truly just don't understand the need to be mean and hurtful toward others simply because they have different beliefs or values.

 

I'm sorry you all had to see those things.

[LisaNY]

You're right. I was in a hurry to get an example down in case the thread was closed.

I do still stand by my point, and I promise I am not trying to defend or bash *anyone's* words. I'm just having difficulty comparing the meanings behind them. Perhaps a Venn diagram is in order. ;)

 

How about this? "I think you're ____________ , so I pray for you."

 

The other example: "I think you're ____________, so I make fun of you."

 

The initial thought process might be the same, but the method of dealing with it is different.

[VaKim]

Well, the high school part, maybe. ;)

 

But there are people whose opinions I respect that belong to social groups whose premise I question. I'm grieved that some of them are taking the opportunity to indulge in misbehavior, but not all of them are.

 

And I'm not willing to say that membership in a group some of whose members misbehave justifies treating a person like the members who are misbehaving. Otherwise, people would think there's no difference between me and Fred Phelps. Or that there's no difference between Nadia and Osama. Or between Eliana and the people who financed Rabin's assassination. No thanks.

Oh, I agree! That is what I was trying to say. That you can read through the actual messages in the groups (not just the members lists) and tell which simply have a different view, and which are hostile and hateful. I guess I wasn't clear. Nothing new. :glare:

[Book Crazy]

You opened a can of worms OP, and now watch us get the groups taken away. And for once I might agree, THIS IS STUPID.

 

She sure did.

 

You would have been better contacting the mods directly.

[Laura in VA]

She sure did.

 

You would have been better contacting the mods directly.

 

Or perhaps people could follow the rules in the first place. What a concept.

[LisaNY]

For what it's worth, I'm not a Christian, and I find the posting in a public place of the kind of comments quoted extremely disheartening. It's also just plain rude, since there is every reason to think that the people being mocked might see those posts.

 

I truly just don't understand the need to be mean and hurtful toward others simply because they have different beliefs or values.

 

I'm sorry you all had to see those things.

 

(((Jenny))) You dear lady! I highly, highly, highly respect you for saying this. You are a true example to us all.

[elegantlion]

The OP may have been asking if board rules applied to social groups as well. But the other intent of the post, was to "tell" on the particular social groups that offended her. She brought out what she found offensive and trotted it around a bit. If she really wanted to know what the rules apply, I'm sure a mod would be a better person to contact then the entire population of the gen board.

 

 

:iagree: The original question was valid. IMO (that's in MY opinion) as soon as the group was named and their postings were brought to the general board it became gossip.

[Karen sn]

She sure did.

 

You would have been better contacting the mods directly.

 

Perhaps that was the intention.

[Karen sn]

Or perhaps people could follow the rules in the first place. What a concept.

 

Is this "you" a general you or specific?

[Laura in VA]

Perhaps that was the intention.

 

Yes, and I also brainwashed the posters to write disrespectful posts.

[Carrie12345]

Originally Posted by Lovedtodeath

And really, saying that Christians should pray for them is the nice thing to do. The intent is that Christians are thinking good thoughts about the people they are praying for. That the people in the prayers are misguided and need help and understanding.

 

Quote:

Ignorant, misguided, lack of understanding... they're the same thing.

You do not know what I was trying to say: They need understanding in that Christians need to understand that they may have very good reasons for believing the way they do. Many "Christians" have taught things in word and action that have turned people away from the Bible. This needs to be understood by Christians.

__________________

Using myself as an example, since that really seems the only fair thing to do...

You are saying I should be thankful for prayers. Prayers that I might receive the help I "need" to correct my "misguided" ways and thoughts. Is that correct?

 

If so, I do find it offensive to be told I am wrong and in need of saving. I wouldn't normally mention how that makes me feel when stated that way. I might, if stronger words were used, because that's much more provocative, and I'm somewhat easy to provoke, lol.

 

If, for instance, someone had written "Let us join together in effort to save Baptists from the error of their ways," I'm inclined to believe many Baptists would take much offense. More provocative words would probably garner more anger, though.

 

It doesn't change the message.

[Liz Mc in SC]

And really, saying that Christians should pray for them is the nice thing to do. I will never understand why non-christians get so mad about that. The intent is that Christians are thinking good thoughts about the people they are praying for. That the people in the prayers are misguided and need help and understanding. If the belief was that they are evil beyond redemption, there would be no prayers left for them.

 

I am a christian, love my faith/God, but this statement even to me can sound offensive.

 

I've found that statements like this sound like a pat on the head, you are so "misguided" and are in "need" of my prayers. When you have smart, educated people standing infront of you, a statement like this such a turn off -- and insulting. Why do we need to announce who we are praying for? Just pray for them. Good intentions may be the idea, but the tone is condesending and does more harm than good. IMHO

[Parabola]

Or perhaps people could follow the rules in the first place. What a concept.

 

I don't believe we have established any specific rules that apply here yet. Again, perhaps contacting the mods directly would've been the road to follow.

[Lovedtodeath]

I am a christian, love my faith/God, but this statement even to me can sound offensive.

 

Originally Posted by Lovedtodeath

And really, saying that Christians should pray for them is the nice thing to do. The intent is that Christians are thinking good thoughts about the people they are praying for. That the people in the prayers are misguided and need help and understanding.

 

Quote:You are saying I should be thankful for prayers. Prayers that I might receive the help I "need" to correct my "misguided" ways and thoughts. Is that correct?

 

It doesn't change the message.

 

No it is not correct, you are putting words into my mouth. I never said that you should be thankful. I am saying that there is no need to be angry over people praying for you because the basic intent is that the one praying is doing their best to love, help, understand and accept you. I have seen some posts that call others to pray for misguided individuals that are offensive, so I know what you mean. But I feel this one was truly not meant in that manner, but was speaking to the offended parties as a reminder to be forgiving.

[elegantlion]

I am a christian, love my faith/God, but this statement even to me can sound offensive.

 

I've found that statements like this sound like a pat on the head, you are so "misguided" and are in "need" of my prayers. When you have smart, educated people standing infront of you, a statement like this such a turn off -- and insulting. Why do we need to announce who we are praying for? Just pray for them. Good intentions may be the idea, but the tone is condesending and does more harm than good. IMHO

 

 

:iagree: Even as a christian I've had people place judgment on me in the form of "I'll pray for you."

[Cheryl in NM]

How about this? "I think you're ____________ , so I pray for you."

 

The other example: "I think you're ____________, so I make fun of you."

 

The initial thought process might be the same, but the method of dealing with it is different.

 

I actually agree with this. I think praying for someone that I believe is misguided is a wonderful thing to do. But...if I know that they don't agree with praying then I don't tell them I'm praying for them. I am a Christain and I pray for people regardless of their personal beliefs. My prayers are between me and God. I see that sometimes Christains use the "I'll pray for you" as a weapon. I hate to see that. We are to show God's love. Judgement is coming and it's not any human's place to make suppositions about other's salvation. I can't find it now, but recently I was reading in my Bible about how we should show compassion and love to all.

 

That being said, I do think that the social groups are a part of this Board so they should be subject to the same rules. They are subject to whatever rules SWB wants to put on them because this is HER space; not a public space. If the social groups are not to be policed properly then I will stay away from them. The hatred that is brewing on this board is really starting to turn me away.

 

I won't use the ignore feature for the same reason I listen to both sides in a political debate. I must know what the other side is thinking so that I can counter it. I just try not to get dragged into a squabble.

[Laura in VA]

You opened a can of worms OP, and now watch us get the groups taken away. And for once I might agree, THIS IS STUPID.

 

Are you serious? You actually think I would be the reason for getting the groups taken away? I believe your frustration is misdirected.

[Parabola]

To get off on the sidetrack that this thread has taken (perhaps for the best), I personally find it offensive when someone prays for me. I feel like they have taken away my choice in the matter. I've chosen not to involve prayers in my life, and if they pray for me knowing that, its arrogant of them, and it takes away my choice. Thats how I feel, though I think I'm more touchy about it then others.

 

It would be like if I danced around a fire and sacrificed a goat in your name without your permission.

 

 

haha just kidding.

[VaKim]

Are you serious? You actually think I would be the reason for getting the groups taken away? I believe your frustration is misdirected.

 

That is kinda like when we were kids, and one of us was drawing on the walls with markers, and the other one told Mama. Then Mama took the markers away, and the one who was doing the drawing blamed the other one for telling. "If you hadn't tattled, we wouldn't have had the markers taken away!" :D

[Lovedtodeath]

I really did not mean for my mentioning the ignore button to be an attack. It's just that some people's posts repeatedly either make me angry or creeped out, and this has given me the boost I need to start doing something about it, for myself. :)

[Lovedtodeath]

It would be like if I danced around a fire and sacrificed a goat in your name without your permission.

 

 

haha just kidding.

 

 

:lol::lol: That's funny! I really would not care though. :D I don't think an activity that I am not in any way involved in would really affect me all that much.

[Blessedfamily]

I don't mind listening to people who are completely different from me at all. The problem is in the presentation. Nasty comments are just that and aren't really meant to exchange ideas. I would ignore a person who does that, but not just a person who disagrees.

 

I also think the original post was a valid question.

 

As for snooping in the groups, they are "social groups", not "private groups". Some of my absolute favorite curriculums are secular and I know some really informed secular homeschoolers. If I thought they would be discussing that I might look. If I thought it was mud slinging I wouldn't bother. (But I might question if it was allowed.)

 

Edited to add: Waaaaay off topic but this post just made me a nurse bee. Yeah!:hurray:

Edited October 23, 2008 by Blessedfamily

[Parabola]

Are you serious? You actually think I would be the reason for getting the groups taken away? I believe your frustration is misdirected.

 

I think that if this gets out of hand, and people start getting all mad about what other people are saying in each others' social groups, and bringing it out on the gen board to cause problems, then its possible the groups will get taken away. The mods aren't going to want to deal with another situaion like the headache that rep had become.

 

You alone would no be reason for getting the groups taken away, should that happen. But you did start something.

 

Oh, I'm not frustrated either. I have no problem with what people are posting in any group. I don't go to the ones that may make me angry, thats just common sense.

[Parabola]

:lol::lol: That's funny! I really would not care though. :D I don't think an activity that I am not in any way involved in would really affect me all that much.

 

It was meant to be funny.

 

Well, off to my little social groups I go. Have a nice day all.

[Lovedtodeath]

I don't mind listening to people who are completely different from me at all. The problem is in the presentation. Nasty comments are just that and aren't really meant to exchange ideas. I would ignore a person who does that, but not just a person who disagrees.

 

I also think the original post was a valid question.

 

As for snooping in the groups, they are "social groups", not "private groups". Some of my absolute favorite curriculums are secular and I know some really informed secular homeschoolers. If I thought they would be discussing that I might look. If I thought it was mud slinging I wouldn't bother. (But I might question if it was allowed.)

 

I took a look and the really sad thing is that the group in question knew that a Christian was reading.:confused:

[Laura in VA]

I think that if this gets out of hand, and people start getting all mad about what other people are saying in each others' social groups, and bringing it out on the gen board to cause problems, then its possible the groups will get taken away. The mods aren't going to want to deal with another situaion like the headache that rep had become.

 

You alone would no be reason for getting the groups taken away, should that happen. But you did start something.

 

Oh, I'm not frustrated either. I have no problem with what people are posting in any group. I don't go to the ones that may make me angry, thats just common sense.

 

I'm sorry, I just don't see how I started it. We'll just have to agree to disagree on that (or not). ;)

[Country Mouse]

It would be like if I danced around a fire and sacrificed a goat

 

Hey! Let's leave the goats out of this! :tongue_smilie:

[LisaNY]

I actually agree with this. I think praying for someone that I believe is misguided is a wonderful thing to do. But...if I know that they don't agree with praying then I don't tell them I'm praying for them. I am a Christain and I pray for people regardless of their personal beliefs. My prayers are between me and God. I see that sometimes Christains use the "I'll pray for you" as a weapon. I hate to see that.

 

 

 

I agree. I don't ever tell someone that doesn't feel the way I do that I'm praying for them unless they ask me to. I try to be very sensitive to other's beliefs.

[Ria]

To get off on the sidetrack that this thread has taken (perhaps for the best), I personally find it offensive when someone prays for me. I feel like they have taken away my choice in the matter. I've chosen not to involve prayers in my life, and if they pray for me knowing that, its arrogant of them, and it takes away my choice. Thats how I feel, though I think I'm more touchy about it then others.

 

It would be like if I danced around a fire and sacrificed a goat in your name without your permission.

 

 

haha just kidding.

 

This is interesting to me. If I found out that you were terribly sick, or that one of your kids had been injured, my first response would be to pray for you or your child...praying for health and healing, that type of thing. I'm not sure that's any different than when people say, "I'll think positive thoughts," is it? Or would it still bother you? I'm asking because yesterday at work my boss got a phone call - a bad injury in his immediate family - and he had to leave for the hospital. I told him I'd pray. It never occurred to me that this could be taken as an offense. :confused:

 

Ria

[Deeke]

I think that if this gets out of hand, and people start getting all mad about what other people are saying in each others' social groups, and bringing it out on the gen board to cause problems, then its possible the groups will get taken away. The mods aren't going to want to deal with another situaion like the headache that rep had become.

 

You alone would no be reason for getting the groups taken away, should that happen. But you did start something.

 

Oh, I'm not frustrated either. I have no problem with what people are posting in any group. I don't go to the ones that may make me angry, thats just common sense.

 

I agree, how about people mind their own business?? I don't go into the christian groups, not my business, post whatever you like, feel free. Wouldn't offend me unless you come to a Secular/Non-Christian board and post it there, then I'd have an issue.

[Gretchen in NJ]

Okay, I looked.

 

My opinion is we should drop this and not comment on it at all. Everyone has a right to their own opinions. There's no law against making fun of people either. I'd rather think we're all buddies too, but the truth is, we aren't. But some of us can be polite.

 

So, since we're proclaiming that we're Christians, just turn the other cheek ladies, and LET IT GO.

I so love your logic. I am in with you.

[Lovedtodeath]

I'm not sure that's any different than when people say, "I'll think positive thoughts," is it? Ria

 

Thank you Ria! This was my point! In this context positive thoughts was the meaning.

 

Unfortunately, I have seen people who say "I will pray for you" in an insulting way to mean that the person is in need of redemption. I have seen it used on the message boards as well. I think this makes people see offense even when the prayer is not meant that way.

 

I should be mopping or sleeping. Continuing to watch for changes in this thread is not constructive use of my time. :auto: See ya!:)

Edited October 23, 2008 by Lovedtodeath

[Liz Mc in SC]

 

It would be like if I danced around a fire and sacrificed a goat in your name without your permission.

 

 

haha just kidding.

 

 

Have at it just don't tell me --- ROFL

[6packofun]

Well.... I could state the obvious.... Don't read groups that don't agree with your beliefs. One reason they are used is so that people can talk among themselves about something they agree on without causing squabbles.

 

I can agree the quotes are extremely offensive. But I'd rather not know what the secular liberal types talk about.

 

I think the question is more about whether or not the moderators bother to moderate the social groups according to the regular board rules or if they've stated somewhere that they won't be. Seems like they may have created a whole lot more work for themselves...LOL!! (Or not, but maybe they could clarify?)

[nmoira]

 

That is kinda like when we were kids, and one of us was drawing on the walls with markers, and the other one told Mama. Then Mama took the markers away, and the one who was doing the drawing blamed the other one for telling. "If you hadn't tattled, we wouldn't have had the markers taken away!" :D

Aside from the fact it's more like going into someone else's room or house and tattling on what you found there, I agree. However, I also agree that quoting from the group in question was bad form, and speaks volumes as to the intent of the OP. Since I haven't gone through and will not be going through the posts of social groups which I clearly do not belong, I decline to comment on the group in question (to which I do belong). I had assumed that part of the intent of the groups was to let some of us blow off steam from slights real or imagined from the general board. IMHO this is a good thing.

[Karen sn]

That is kinda like when we were kids, and one of us was drawing on the walls with markers, and the other one told Mama. Then Mama took the markers away, and the one who was doing the drawing blamed the other one for telling. "If you hadn't tattled, we wouldn't have had the markers taken away!" :D

 

Not quite the same thing at all.

If a group is discussing on their own turf - leave them alone.

 

If the christian group wants to call me an agnostic god hater going straight to hell for an eternity of burning that I soooo deserve - I don't care. I will never read it because I am not going to be reading their group interaction.

 

Coloring on the wall is going to be noticed by the simple act of walking by it on the way to somewhere else. Going into someone's group is looking for trouble. I have to wonder why Kelly was there in the first place.

 

I wonder if there is an infraction for bringing private group discussions to the main board.

[hsmamainva]

Not quite the same thing at all.

If a group is discussing on their own turf - leave them alone.

 

If the christian group wants to call me an agnostic god hater going straight to hell for an eternity of burning that I soooo deserve - I don't care. I will never read it because I am not going to be reading their group interaction.

 

Coloring on the wall is going to be noticed by the simple act of walking by it on the way to somewhere else. Going into someone's group is looking for trouble. I have to wonder why Kelly was there in the first place.

 

I wonder if there is an infraction for bringing private group discussions to the main board.

 

Psstt....it was Laura (if you're referring to the OP).

 

Not to be confused with me...who also lives in Virginia...and does have a SIL named Laura, who also lives in Virginia... :leaving:

[Blessedfamily]

.

 

I wonder if there is an infraction for bringing private group discussions to the main board.

 

It's not private groups it's social groups.

[Deeke]

Not quite the same thing at all.

If a group is discussing on their own turf - leave them alone.

 

If the christian group wants to call me an agnostic god hater going straight to hell for an eternity of burning that I soooo deserve - I don't care. I will never read it because I am not going to be reading their group interaction.

 

Coloring on the wall is going to be noticed by the simple act of walking by it on the way to somewhere else. Going into someone's group is looking for trouble. I have to wonder why Kelly was there in the first place.

 

I wonder if there is an infraction for bringing private group discussions to the main board.

 

:iagree::iagree::iagree: Thank you!