S/O: If your husband died would you be able to access all your assets?

[BusyMum]

That Steve Fosset thread got me thinking about our spouse/partners and jointly owned assets. Do you know how to access them? Do you even have authority to do so?

 

My husband and I have power of attorney so have full access to anything with each others names on it. But in practical terms, if my husband wasn't around I would have no problems with accessing all our assets as I either know the passwords or have joint signing authority.

 

In fact the one who would be in trouble is my husband if I disappeared off the face of the planet. He would have no idea how to sell our shares, what our bank account passwords are or even what banks we are with, all the utilities are in my name and my signature is on the mortgages. We joke that he earns it - I spend it. I also joke that if I decided to leave him I could have all our assets liquidated in three days without him being the wiser! Good thing we are in this for life! :)

Edited October 3, 2008 by BusyMum

[Amy in Orlando]

That Steve Fosset thread got me thinking about our spouse/partners and jointly owned assets. Do you know how to access them? Do you even have authority to do so?

 

My husband and I have power of attorney so have full access to anything with each others names on it. But in practical terms, if my husband wasn't around I would have no problems with accessing all our assets as I either know the passwords or have joint signing authority.

 

In fact the one who would be in trouble is my husband if I disappeared off the face of the planet. He would have no idea how to sell our shares, what our bank account passwords are or even what banks we are with, all the utilities are in my name and my signature is on the mortgages. We joke that earns it - I spend it. I also joke that if I decided to leave him I could have all our assets liquidated in three days without him being teh wiser! Good thing we are in this for life! :)

 

Yes - but it took my dh getting hugely, seriously ill until we addressed the issue. We each have notebooks now with vital information should one of us need it.

[mazakaal]

LOL we don't have any assets for me to access. I could deal with the bank accounts, and we don't own stock. So I think I'd be fine.

[nmoira]

Yes, but I'm not confident that the reverse is true. I handle everything.

[Kris]

I handle the money, too. The problem Sweetie would have, though, is finding my stashes. I always try to tell him where I've hidden things when he comes home, but then I get paranoid thinking it's not a good spot, and move it! Sometimes *I* don't even know where I've hidden things, and I feel like those poor squirrels who work so hard all summer, and then can't find the nuts. :lol:

 

The poor guy would have no clue where to start looking -- unless I've started using some of the same old places and just don't remember I've used them before. :lol:

[RoughCollie]

The problem Sweetie would have, though, is finding my stashes.

 

I have stashes too. I put their locations in a password-protected file and I told DH the password I use for everything important. That way, if I forget where I put something, I have a record of its location, and if I die, DH will be able to find it.

 

I also have a notebook which details everything DH would need to know about finances, home maintenance & repair, and raising the kids. In the raising the kids section, I have lists of clothes needed for each season and an inventory form for figuring out what to buy, meal plans, master grocery lists, activities and contacts, and so forth.

[Quiver0f10]

LOL we don't have any assets for me to access. I could deal with the bank accounts, and we don't own stock. So I think I'd be fine.

 

 

This is us too right now. We have a checking account and that is it. No savings, no retirement, no stocks, no house. Nadda :eek:

[Catherine]

after ward we made sure everything was in order, but it's true that I think he'd have a lot more trouble finding everything if I died. He would eventually, our accounts are joint accounts, but it would be hard for him at what I assume would be a difficult time.

 

I have a good friend whose husband died unexpectedly, and a week later she discovered that his life insurance payment went in its entirety to her stepson, who was already wealthy. She had to scramble to find work (after 18 years as a SAHM) to keep her house and pay for their daughter's college education. I wanted to cry for her. I'm convinced it was just an oversight on his part to not provide for her and their daughter (he made a very good living). Argh.

[lynn]

Yes, I have all the contact information I need to get what I need.

[Parrothead]

Yes, I could access most everything. Some easier than others, but I could get it all taken care of.

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

I don't know how it is in the States, but here, when someone dies, all their accounts are frozen for 6 months. Including joint accounts! My aunt found out the hard way when her husband died. She was left plenty of money, but was completely penniless for 6 months because all they had were joint accounts. Her kids had to bail her out!

Since then, my mom started her own, private, account. There's enough money in it to cover expenses for 6 months, until she gets access to everything else they own jointly.

[riada]

Yes, but I'm not confident that the reverse is true. I handle everything.

 

This would be us. We have a notebook with all the pertinent information in it so I hope that would help him, but the majority of it is in my name. We really should get power of attorneys.:glare:

[Laura R (FL)]

I would have access to our banking accts, but all of our real estate in in trust. So...we don't even have access to it while we're alive! But our best friend is the trustee.

[mysticamethyst]

I know I would be okay, I would have to worry about it if it happens the other way around. DH has no idea what bank we even use, lol, of course these days nor do I. :D

[StaceyinLA]

And his life insurance would be issued to me as well. I'd have no problems.

[jamnkats]

In June of this year I finally did this. Not so much for the assets, but so my husband would know where the accounts are (and the kids accounts) and all the online information, what bills are due when and I also setup generated 21 character passwords - and got rid of the same 3 passwords I was using all over the Internets.

 

I put everything in KeePass and on an external harddrive so nothing is tied to one computer. He just needs the password to the database. I sent the password to the database to my sister as a backup in the event we both die. I highly recommend doing this - now if I die he knows and if my mind goes, everything is down (all the "stuff" that you keep floating in your head when you take care of the finanaces/online stuff).

[Nestof3]

Well, our names are on everything jointly. I take care of all of the paperwork, so what I really need to do is make sure my husband has all of my passwords. :)

 

I did make a chart of all of the bills I pay a month with a column for every month. As I pay the bill, I place a check mark in the column. So, at a glance, it's easy to see what we owe. I also keep a debt log, updating each month as I pay so that we know what we owe on the house, the van, and our medical payment.

 

I have folders for things like banking, investments, health insurance, life insurance, other insurances, mortgage, etc.

Edited October 3, 2008 by nestof3

[Amy loves Bud]

Well, theoretically, yes, but in reality I can't remember the passwords, and Bud is adamant that they not be written down anywhere. They are in his head only. Every now and then I ask them and I remember for a few days and then....poof.

 

I try to tell him that no self respecting burglar is going to sift through *my insanely disorganized* desk and try to make heads or tails of anything on it. But he sticks to his guns. So lets just hope that if he goes, it's within a few days of reminding me of the passwords!

[Danestress]

Joint accounts are truly jointly owned and each spouse has access to the account should the other die.

[susie in tx]

I most definitely could access 99.9% of everything. My husband travels for his job AND he is in the National Guard. So, I handle the majority of the stuff here at home anyway. The only thing I don't have access to is his expense account. And, it's really negligible anyhow.

 

I also have a POA, but I don't know how valid it is. It's from a deployment in 2003.

[Stacie]

Recently I learned that joint accounts do not necessarily mean what I thought they did. My grandfather passed after a month in the hospital. My grandmother had access to very little money during and after that time. He set up some accounts in his name with her name as POD (payable on death). Others he set up as "joint tenants in common" which is to say they are like business partners. In the absence of specific percentages, she owns 50% and he owned 50%. She only had access to hers. And some had both names but Mr. and Mrs. which required both signatures to access. He was unable to sign anything during his incapacitation.

 

Some institutions (why does that name sound so appropriate here?) require a death certificate to access the accounts, some require the estate go through probate. It's been quite a headache and a learning experience. It took six weeks for a death certificate to be issued.

 

Please take the time to make sure the accounts can be accessed by you in the event he's incapacitated and not dead. We were afraid my grandfather may require costly longer term care that would have required going to court to get access to a large part of his assets. I'm working on confirming the status of our accounts now after watching this process up close. It's not fun, but necessary!

Edited October 3, 2008 by Stacie

[Amy loves Bud]

Well, theoretically, yes, but in reality I can't remember the passwords, and Bud is adamant that they not be written down anywhere. They are in his head only. Every now and then I ask them and I remember for a few days and then....poof.

 

I try to tell him that no self respecting burglar is going to sift through *my insanely disorganized* desk and try to make heads or tails of anything on it. But he sticks to his guns. So lets just hope that if he goes, it's within a few days of reminding me of the passwords!

 

I also want to add that we keep several months living expenses in a joint money market fund. Since Bud is all commission, we sometimes go a long while without a check. So even if it took me a bit to get to our money, I would have immediate accesss to our emergency fund.

[Heather in the Kootenays]

We joke that he earns it - I spend it. I also joke that if I decided to leave him I could have all our assets liquidated in three days without him being the wiser! Good thing we are in this for life! :)

 

 

that's like our house - I always tell him he's lucky I'm trustworthy because he'd never know.

[Jenny in Florida]

We've traded off the money handling thing over the years. Sometimes, he's the primary. Other times it's me. We had a crisis a few years ago when he decided he didn't like the way I was doing things and "took over."

 

Of course, he doesn't really have the time to do it, so now we have a sort of hybrid approach. He makes the money and handles the sort of "macro" issues, while I pay bills and do the little, daily stuff. In other words, he watches the balances in our checking and savings accounts, does most of the long-range planning (such as squirreling money away for upcoming large expenses) and tells me when we need to cut back. I watch the montly bills, pay things as they are due, keep the records of what we've spent and keep him informed when big expenses are on the horizon. (When I'm getting ready to order homeschool supplies or pay registration fees for extracurriculars, for example, or take the kids shopping, I let him know as far in advance as possible. Then he tells me when it's "safe" and how much I can spend.

 

I think he might have a harder time than I would, actually, because he doesn't deal with the daily stuff and often can't remember the names of the companies with whom we have accounts. In the last year, though, I've started keeping better records of who got paid what and when. They're all in files and labelled now. So, I'm sure he'd figure it out.

 

Until this year, we never had any "investments" worth worrying about. Since my father-in-law's death this summer, though, my husband has been in charge of his father's estate. He inherited a nice chunk of money (not life changing, but nice), which is now in a trust. I don't know much about the specifics of that, but I know what institution manages it and would recognize the name of the contact there. I also know where my husband keeps the papers relating to those accounts. So, again, I'd figure it out if necessary.

[susie in tx]

Recently I learned that joint accounts do not necessarily mean what I thought they did.

 

I'd forgotten about this. I know that there were some issues about my fil and step-mil's accounts when they died last year. Accounts were frozen from the time of death forward.

 

However, I am the primary account holder on almost all of our main accounts. Should they be frozen, I have another main account that is in my name only. I need to make it so that dh can access should anything happen to me.

[Retired]

QUOTE=BusyMum;571342] But in practical terms, if my husband wasn't around I would have no problems with accessing all our assets as I either know the passwords or have joint signing authority.

 

In fact the one who would be in trouble is my husband if I disappeared off the face of the planet. He would have no idea how to sell our shares, what our bank account passwords are or even what banks we are with, all the utilities are in my name and my signature is on the mortgages. We joke that he earns it - I spend it. I also joke that if I decided to leave him I could have all our assets liquidated in three days without him being the wiser! Good thing we are in this for life! :)

 

I tell ds he really needs to learn passwords and stuff. He isn't interested. I wrote out a list of assets, passwords, and etc for him. He has the information if something happens to me.

 

.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Like many of you, my husband would be the one in trouble! But I think ds11 would be able to help him figure it out. . .

 

We have joint accounts on everything except for IRAs and those have each other as the beneficiary. What we are not covered for is if both of us die.

[Carol in Cal.]

Your post might be right, but if the successor terms are not set up correctly, you could get the nasty surprise of not being able to access that account if your DH died. Joint accounts are more tricky in that circumstance than most people think.

[Colleen]

I feel like a dolt, but I can't think why any of you would need passwords to access your assets. Granted, our assets are pretty-straight forward, so there's not a lot of hoop-jumping involved.

[PariSarah]

. . . and I'm not sure dh would even be able to figure out where all our assets are and what to do with them. He could get bills paid, I imagine, but I'm not sure he's ever even balanced a checkbook.

 

Well, I mean, I'm sure he could learn it, if someone would tell him how. He's not an idiot. It's just that he would have a pretty steep learning curve.

 

ETA: My mom doesn't know ANYTHING about their finances, and she doesn't want to. Fortunately, my dad's organized enough that I think I could figure it all out. But I may have to say something to him in a few years about making it possible for me to walk her through things if he predeceases her.

[Tracey in TX]

DH's best friends both lost their dads in 5th grade. Neither of the moms could access the accounts and were left dependent upon others to learn how to handle and find finances. This shaped DH's view of financial security by age 11y/o. We take turns, every few years, paying bills and handling our finances. My go-to man is our financial planner, who knows he will need to walk me through initial finances and show where our available money is and how to access the life insurance policy. (He lost his mom in a drunk driving accident at 10y/o, so he appreciates the importance.)

 

DS' friend lost his dad in a car accident last week and their family is trying to work on finding their money. All information and passwords were on dad's Blackberry, but they can't get in b/c they don't even have the PDA password.

 

It's horrible to know that on top of grieving, helping children grieve, the finances are also of the utmost importance. One would hope it would be irrelevant for some grieving period, but that's not typically possible.

[Amy loves Bud]

I feel like a dolt, but I can't think why any of you would need passwords to access your assets. Granted, our assets are pretty-straight forward, so there's not a lot of hoop-jumping involved.

 

Investment accounts. Ours have passwords.

[Jenny in Florida]

Vote McCain/Palin 2008

.

 

Gee, Tracey. I'm really not sure where you stand, politically. Could you clarify?

 

(Just kidding.)

[newbie]

The only info I have is call the bookkeeper, hopefully I can find dh's cell phone, and figure out who the bookkeeper is.

 

I just pray he outlives me.

[susie in tx]

Fortunately, my dad's organized enough that I think I could figure it all out. But I may have to say something to him in a few years about making it possible for me to walk her through things if he predeceases her.

 

When my fil and step-mil died, there had been no plans, that I know of, to talk to either of the executrix about the finances. However, everything was in order, in a file cabinet. I would always encourage everyone to have their information in a place that is easily accessible to someone just coming in and looking for financial information. One just never knows.

[Brigitte]

What's his is ours and what's mine is mine. ;) I have one personal account and my business account that dh does not have access to. But, there is basically not a lot in there. Both names are on everything else.

[Tracey in TX]

Gee, Tracey. I'm really not sure where you stand, politically. Could you clarify?

 

(Just kidding.)

LOL This is just in case *I* forget. It's a daily reminder! :lol:

[Peela]

I feel like a dolt, but I can't think why any of you would need passwords to access your assets. Granted, our assets are pretty-straight forward, so there's not a lot of hoop-jumping involved.

 

 

Passwords for us would simply relate to internet banking, as far as I can think, and we both know them.

We have a joint account, but I also have separate accounts which are operational, and doing Flylady years ago, I set up a journal with all my passwords on it (and emergency information, like my parent's addresses) for him, if anything were to happen to me.

We have life insurance on both of us nowadays, so that's clean.

If he died, we have some cash backup but I would have to be pretty quick, i think, to get people to move in here (and I am not that keen on that idea) or else to move out and find a smaller house. Its hard to think of having to do that when grieving and supporting kids grieving.

We have discussed what I would do if he went, though....pay off the two investment properties with the life insurance, or sell one and pay off the other, and buy a place to live in (we rent, cant afford to buy where we are and we like it here).

 

But thanks for the thread...I think its time i made sure he knows where the information is, he would have forgotten by now, and I tidied up the loose ends around all that.

[Nestof3]

 

I feel like a dolt, but I can't think why any of you would need passwords to access your assets.

 

I wasn't speaking of passwords needed to access assets but rather bills needed to be paid. Since I pay everything online, my husband wouldn't get a bill in the mail most of the time telling him what needed to be paid, and the last thing he would need is a bunch of overdue accounts.

 

It would still be much more convenient if he also knew my banking passwords so that he can easily take care of things online without hassling with obtaining new passwords.

[Amy in Orlando]

Well, theoretically, yes, but in reality I can't remember the passwords, and Bud is adamant that they not be written down anywhere. They are in his head only. Every now and then I ask them and I remember for a few days and then....poof.

 

I try to tell him that no self respecting burglar is going to sift through *my insanely disorganized* desk and try to make heads or tails of anything on it. But he sticks to his guns. So lets just hope that if he goes, it's within a few days of reminding me of the passwords!

 

Amy, PLEASE talk to Bud. Mike was perfectly healthy and fine and suddenly he wasn't AND no one was optimistic he would live. For drama, we had a few hurricanes which left me searching for paperwork in the dark, sweating and trying not to catch anything on fire.

 

I do most of the paperwork in our house. Since that sweaty, dark night, I keep a notebook just for Mike in case I get hit by a bus - the man has no clue. I keep all of these notes in a grade school X-subject notebook, stored with all of our other textbooks.

 

When it came down to the nitty-gritty, I could have handled the very worst. I don't know that my dh could. Since our experience with this, I've tried to keep notes and make it easy for dh should anything happen to me. (And, if sh can't figure it out, my oldest is privy to the BIG stuff just in case. I think our situation is/was extreme, but I sleep easier.)

[Amy loves Bud]

Amy, PLEASE talk to Bud. Mike was perfectly healthy and fine and suddenly he wasn't AND no one was optimistic he would live. For drama, we had a few hurricanes which left me searching for paperwork in the dark, sweating and trying not to catch anything on fire.

 

I do most of the paperwork in our house. Since that sweaty, dark night, I keep a notebook just for Mike in case I get hit by a bus - the man has no clue. I keep all of these notes in a grade school X-subject notebook, stored with all of our other textbooks.

 

When it came down to the nitty-gritty, I could have handled the very worst. I don't know that my dh could. Since our experience with this, I've tried to keep notes and make it easy for dh should anything happen to me. (And, if sh can't figure it out, my oldest is privy to the BIG stuff just in case. I think our situation is/was extreme, but I sleep easier.)

 

No worries, Amy! Like I said, this is investment type stuff that I wouldn't need right away. I have easy access to our "Emergency Fund". It would carry me long enough to get through any issues with our investment co in accessing the money.

 

I know *where* it all is, I just don't know the passwords.

 

I can't imagine what you must have gone through during that time. It's hard enough to be worrying about him and the kids, but then add in the financial aspect and it's just too much. I'm glad it all had a happy ending!