You know the hsing comment I dislike the most after 10 years of hsing

[lori in tx]

When people ask my kids, " do you like homeschooling?" Why do people do that, I feel like asking their kids do you like going to public school? What if my kids said no? What are you going to do about it? What if their kids said no about going to public school? Does that mean you should do something about it?

 

My kids get asked this all the time, like it is you the grocery store clerks business do you like working at Wal-mart(because you don't look too happy)? UGH sorry I am a little allergy challenged today and the stupid "cat loving had to have 3 loads of cats removed last month, cat pee smelling" neighbor asked my dd this morning, while he asked me to do another favor (that we will not do because the answer is no to every thing now!). UGH rant over

blessings

lori

[Zelda]

Oh, wow. People ask my kids this a lot (of course) and its always irked me but I never really explored why. You're right! No one asks a conventionally schooled kid if they like it in a way that implies that if they don't then there is a problem.

 

Ack!

[VaKim]

I feel like asking their kids do you like going to public school?

I like this idea. Might try it sometime soon. :)

What if my kids said no?

My youngest DID used to say no! But what she actually meant was that she didn't like school work at all. I explained to her that what they were actually asking is if she would prefer public school, and ever since then, she says an emphatic yes when they ask.

[yslek]

:grouphug:

Sorry you're having to deal with that. I used to be one of those people (before my own dc were "school age".) I know in my case, dh and I had already decided to hs and we were curious to see how other hsed kids felt about it. I really isn't a useful question, though, is it? Hope you recover from allergy rot & don't have to deal with stupid questions for a while.

 

Kelsy (who remembers being asked "do you like school?" many times by well-meaning adults when she was younger!)

[1bassoon]

That's funny - just two weeks ago, we had a cookout with dh's family.

 

My mil's boyfriend-type-person was very, very fascinated with the whole idea of homeschooling. In a good way, actually. He was full of questions, especially for my eldest - it was kind of a fun conversation.

 

At any rate, we got the usual, "What makes you think you can do as good a job as the schools? Do you have to pass any tests to show they're actually learning?" (really, it was very sincere and nice, not snarky, the way he asked it). I basically said something to the effect that it comes down to "who has responsibility for our chidren - us or the government", and then asked the inverse question: if the children don't do well in govt school, shouldn't we require them to be homeschooled?

 

I wasn't really serious ;), but it was fun to challenge a presupposition (my mil is extremely liberal) that the govt knows what's best.

 

Anyways - as I'm typing I realize this could open up a whole can of worms, not my intent - but it was actually a fun, non-threatening conversation to inform someone about the benefits of hschooling.

[1bassoon]

When people ask my kids, " do you like homeschooling?" Why do people do that?

 

 

OK, Lori - forgive me for not even answering your op! Sorry about that -

 

Sometimes, I think it's just their way of making conversation, not passing judgment. People are ALWAYS asking all kinds of kids how's school - so hopefully it was that. But I know, it's kind of like they're testing you - "surely the kid can't like it, must be mom's kooky idea!"

 

Just for fun - sometime, when you're with some hschooling kids, ask them how they like their teacher this year! It's pretty fun to watch their faces. . . . . "Uh??? It's my MOM!" :D

[Alice]

I have to say I have asked homeschooled kids this...but for me it's because we're just starting out homeschooling and I really want to know. :) I think I'm looking for them to say "yes" more than I'm looking for them to say "no" so I can find fault with the parents.

 

But you're right now that I think of it...it's kind of a dumb question without a good answer.

[katalaska]

:001_rolleyes: almost as much as I love the follow-up question, which is, "Do you like your teacher?" We get that one even more often. There is usually a huge, embarrassing pause while my dc consider whether or not they like me. It's just lovely. :rolleyes:

 

As to why people ask such questions, I have no idea. And I think the counter-question about whether their kids "like" public school is a good one. What if they do? What if they don't? Does it matter!?

 

Besides, surely whether or not they "like homeschool" (or public school) or "like their teacher" is irrelevant. Right!?

[Zelda]

:001_rolleyes: almost as much as I love the follow-up question, which is, "Do you like your teacher?" We get that one even more often. There is usually a huge, embarrassing pause while my dc consider whether or not they like me. It's just lovely. :rolleyes:

 

 

*snort*

[beansprouts]

It is an annoying question because it comes from the perspective of homeschooling being deviant and unusual.

 

But for my kids? Bring it on!

But only if they have the time to hear them rave for a while about how much they love school :D

[Mama Lynx]

 

Besides, surely whether or not they "like homeschool" (or public school) or "like their teacher" is irrelevant. Right!?

 

You've obviously never run up against someone who was concerned about children being homeschooled "against their will" :rolleyes:

[myfunnybunch]

When my dd's were in public school they were often asked questions like, "Do you/how do you like school?" and "Do you like your teacher?"

 

It's a fairly typical question for children, kind of akin to asking an adult, "So what do you do for a living?" or "Do you enjoy your job?" Most people are just making conversation, clumsily at times. :)

 

Cat

[bkpan]

OK, Lori - forgive me for not even answering your op! Sorry about that -

 

Sometimes, I think it's just their way of making conversation, not passing judgment. People are ALWAYS asking all kinds of kids how's school - so hopefully it was that. But I know, it's kind of like they're testing you - "surely the kid can't like it, must be mom's kooky idea!"

 

Just for fun - sometime, when you're with some hschooling kids, ask them how they like their teacher this year! It's pretty fun to watch their faces. . . . . "Uh??? It's my MOM!" :D

 

and yes, ps kids get asked ALL the time how they are liking school?? I remember being asked. I think that it is just small talk, and that almost all of the time, people are just trying to connect.

 

It might be a little sensitive to us (hard not to take personally), if our kids answer "nope!", but kids are kids. We don't hs because our kids like it, any more than parents who send their kids to ps.

 

Kim

[Kris]

When my dd's were in public school they were often asked questions like, "Do you/how do you like school?" and "Do you like your teacher?"

 

It's a fairly typical question for children, kind of akin to asking an adult, "So what do you do for a living?" or "Do you enjoy your job?" Most people are just making conversation, clumsily at times. :)

 

Cat

 

:iagree:

 

When my son's friends visit, I ask them how they're liking school, if they have a favorite teacher -- that sort of thing. And I got asked questions like that all the time by grownups who were trying to have a conversation with me. When people ask my son things like that, I don't think anything about it. Most of the time, they don't even know he's homeschooled.

[Lolly]

True.

[Guest]

:001_rolleyes: almost as much as I love the follow-up question, which is, "Do you like your teacher?" We get that one even more often. There is usually a huge, embarrassing pause while my dc consider whether or not they like me. It's just lovely. :rolleyes:

 

 

Someone asked DS if his mommy was a good teacher. He shook his head and said........

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"No."

 

:lol::lol::lol:

[Plucky]

Gosh, I must do a lot of annoying stuff. I ask kids that all the time. My kids always answer that they do like homeschooling and so do most of the kids that I ask. I'm just making conversation. Hmm, maybe I should rethink my conversation starters.

[Zelda]

:iagree:

 

When my son's friends visit, I ask them how they're liking school, if they have a favorite teacher -- that sort of thing. And I got asked questions like that all the time by grownups who were trying to have a conversation with me. When people ask my son things like that, I don't think anything about it. Most of the time, they don't even know he's homeschooled.

 

That's true. But I think there are different questions. Like, "How do you like school?", is different from, "Do you like being homeschooled?", or "Do you like homeschool?"

 

There's a tone too...but yes, sometimes people are just asking, "Hey how's school." Its in the tone.

[Greta]

I'm just making conversation. Hmm, maybe I should rethink my conversation starters.

 

I don't know if you really need to rethink it. I think that it will be apparent in your tone and body language when your intention is kind and not judgmental. My dd gets asked this a lot, and I've always felt like the person was just attempting polite conversation.

 

Now, what DOES bug me is when people start QUIZZING her after finding out she's homeschooled! THAT really ticks me off. When I was growing up, people would ask me if I liked school all the time. But no one ever followed up by drilling me on multiplication facts or dates of historical events!!! :cursing:

[Jill- OK]

I think that it will be apparent in your tone and body language when your intention is kind and not judgmental. My dd gets asked this a lot, and I've always felt like the person was just attempting polite conversation.

 

Now, what DOES bug me is when people start QUIZZING her after finding out she's homeschooled! THAT really ticks me off. When I was growing up, people would ask me if I liked school all the time. But no one ever followed up by drilling me on multiplication facts or dates of historical events!!! :cursing:

 

 

If you're just smiling, and asking, "So, are you enjoying what you're studying this year?" I think that's quite a bit different than the narrowed eyes, suspicious looks, and lowered voice when asking something like..."Do you really hate being locked up at home with Mommy all day? It's okay, you can tell me..."

 

Ditto with the quizzing on material. I'd joyfully listen to an explanation of something that a kid was telling me (on their own) that they'd learned in school, or ask questions about that...but I wouldn't try and figure out what they were learning or how well they were learning it. That's their parents proble--excuse, me, business. ;-)

[Plucky]

Okay, good. You know I don't think my kids have every been quizzed. What kind of person does that? Sheesh.

[CalicoKat]

When people ask my kids, " do you like homeschooling?" Why do people do that, I feel like asking their kids do you like going to public school? What if my kids said no? What are you going to do about it? What if their kids said no about going to public school? Does that mean you should do something about it?

 

My kids get asked this all the time, like it is you the grocery store clerks business do you like working at Wal-mart(because you don't look too happy)? UGH sorry I am a little allergy challenged today and the stupid "cat loving had to have 3 loads of cats removed last month, cat pee smelling" neighbor asked my dd this morning, while he asked me to do another favor (that we will not do because the answer is no to every thing now!). UGH rant over

blessings

lori

Before they get a chance to answer, glare at your kids and ask, "Well do ya love your teacher, do ya!?!"

 

Use your best, "I dare you to contradict" tone of voice.

 

:D

[Kris]

Before they get a chance to answer, glare at your kids and ask, "Well do ya love your teacher, do ya!?!"

 

Use your best, "I dare you to contradict" tone of voice.

 

:D

 

And wave the red flag in front of the bull?! :lol:

[Mom to Aly]

I love it! Because my dd ADORES hsing--and she will tell them why for 10 min!! Why it is so much better than ps--how she is 9 but has a college level reading level, would be in 4th grade, but is at least 2 grade levels ahead in almost every subject, etc. What can they say to that? I think it is a good lesson for THEM to learn ;).

[Storm Bay]

It's a good thing that no one asked me this this afternoon, because I would have replied that I hate, hate, hate it. :glare:

 

Normally I don't mind that question too much because most people really don't know much about homeschooling because it's outside the "norm." The question I don't like is the one about socialization, even though I understand why most people ask it (ignorance due to lack of proper education on this in our society at large).

 

Karin, who is signing off now because everything I post right now will just be grumpy.

[RoughCollie]

Now, what DOES bug me is when people start QUIZZING her after finding out she's homeschooled!

 

No kidding. No one has ever quizzed my kids when they are attending a parochial or public school. I do not allow people to get away with doing that to my homeschooled kids. I'm the only one who may give tests to my children.

 

RC

[Nestof3]

I agree -- it irks me too.

 

I've had people ask my son or me: "How does he like homeschooling?" followed by "He never wants to go to regular school?" Or, "What will you do if he wants to go to regular school?"

 

Ask most kids in school, and they'll say they can think of lots of things they'd rather be doing, and NO -- no one ever asked me if I was okay with school when I was in school. And, since when do kids just get what they want despite what the parents think is best?

[HRAAB]

"Don't you think you will ever want to go to NORMAL school?" I had someone ask my 7 yr old that last week. Of course she looks at me for an answer.

 

Janet

[lori in tx]

I had one person ask me one time, "So what are you going to do when you get sick of homeschooling them?" I told her, "graduate them!" She didn't seem to care for that but it is like, excuse me what are you going to do when you get sick of working. or what are you going to do when your 9th grader gets sick of going to public school! It is like just because we homeschool us they can ask us insane questions, anyway thanks for the support :)

[Storm Bay]

Now that I'm more cheerful, I realize the OP wasn't addressing the Q to the parent but the dc. Mine really don't get asked that often, and I agree that it would depend on the tone, etc. I've had people ask my dc if they like their teacher when they find out they homeschool, but it's usually been done with a twinkle in their eye.

[PinkInTheBlue]

I absolutely agree! I don't think I hear it often but that's really annoying. However, it's no different than people asking public schooled kids if they are liking school. I'd guess a massive majority of them answer NO but we take that answer personally, of course. :)

[MicheleB]

This is too funny, because this happened to us today as well! I had to take my oldest dd to the doctor for an ear infection and the nurse practitioner said, "Do you like homeschooling?" And I don't know about you all, but when it's a "professional" like that asking, I inwardly shrink and think it's a test of my parenting skills, etc.

 

Of course dd said "Yeah." Then the NP asked my other dd who was with us. "Yeah." :001_huh:

 

I thought, Don't sound so enthused, girls. :glare: :D

[VaKim]

I agree -- it irks me too.

 

I've had people ask my son or me: "How does he like homeschooling?" followed by "He never wants to go to regular school?" Or, "What will you do if he wants to go to regular school?"

 

Ask most kids in school, and they'll say they can think of lots of things they'd rather be doing, and NO -- no one ever asked me if I was okay with school when I was in school. And, since when do kids just get what they want despite what the parents think is best?

:iagree: And wouldn't it be fun to ask one of them, "What will you do if your child wants to be homeschooled?" :)

 

When people ask kids in ps if they like school, and the kids say, no, the people don't really think anything of it. Usually just chuckle or something. But if they ask a homeschooler the same question, and get a "no" answer, they immediately think, "Poor thing. Being forced to stay home and not get to spend any time with other kids, ride the school bus, blah blah blah...." As if they would be so much happier in ps.

[Nestof3]

And wouldn't it be fun to ask one of them, "What will you do if your child wants to be homeschooled?" :)

 

:cheers2:

[Greta]

I do not allow people to get away with doing that to my homeschooled kids. I'm the only one who may give tests to my children.

 

When one annoying person asked my dd if she knew what 9 x 9 was, she answered: "Yes." and left it at that. I loved it! :D But when he tried to keep quizzing her, I intervened. And I explained to her afterwards that she is not obligated to answer any such questions except when asked by mom or dad.

[Jean in Newcastle]

:iagree: And wouldn't it be fun to ask one of them, "What will you do if your child wants to be homeschooled?" :)

 

 

 

I have people tell me all the time, "Little Johnny begs me to homeschool them." Then they chuckle as if Little Johnny is trying to pull a good one over them.

[Once]

Okay, good. You know I don't think my kids have every been quizzed. What kind of person does that? Sheesh.

 

My Mary Kay rep spent a few minutes one day asking dd her addition facts and grilling her on American history facts. She was in Kindergarten. :001_huh:

 

Yeah. It happens and it can be hard to not take personally. I think I have changed in this area. Perhaps it was the testing results perhaps it was just feeling a bit more confident but now it does not bother me when others do it. (But I cannot stand it when it comes from my family!!!!!) She was just trying to be chatty while I wrote the check and sometimes things like that have different meanings than intended.

 

Ftr, I do not buy MK anymore. ;) So I guess I haven't changed that much.

[lwilliams1922]

my dd/12 is still 'adjusting' as it is our first year.

 

If someone asks her she may say no, she wants to go back to private school to be with her friends. although lately I've heard her say Yes, I think that is to end the qestions however.

 

I say (to myself) that 'no, she doesnt like hs'ing because we're still trying to undo all the damage that the system caused.'

 

I guess I don't mind because I find it funny. when a person first meets my DD they usually make assumptions about her. She's very disorgannized.

 

anyone that spends at least 5 mins talking to her sees that she's more read than most adults. I can usually tell the moment they come to that realization as they stare blankly/puzzled by her vocabulary or knowledge on a topic.

 

I always wished I could hs when she was a toddler learning to read. At the time I thought it best to work hard to send her to a good private school.

 

It's too bad.

 

If i only knew then what i know now....

[justme]

I agree that it is an annoying question because it is almost always asked in a 'gotcha' kind of way. They are just waiting for them to say no so they can give you 'the look' that says 'see-they should be in real school'. And my dc usually say no or at best it's just okay because they think I give them TOO MUCH work and their friends in school seem to have it easier!

 

It would be interesting to ask random kids out with their parents if they like public school and when they say no to chastise their parents and say they should obviously hs them! I wonder how they'd like that?

[Storm Bay]

:iagree: And wouldn't it be fun to ask one of them, "What will you do if your child wants to be homeschooled?" :)

 

 

I asked my sister that once, and she just said they'd never homeschool. However, I think one of her dc would far rather homeschool and would be better off in many ways, but of course I keep my mouth shut. I hate it when she gives me unsolicited advice, so I never give her any. Which is funny, since I don't get nearly as offended receiving it from most other people or as concerned about giving it in certain situations (which is very rare and always with a smile and an initial disclaimer that they're free to take it with a grain of salt.)