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Did I tell anybody that DH got me the two books published by America's Test Kitchen on gluten free baking? I'm looking forward to teaching the boys how to bake good GF chewy chocolate chip cookies.

I made Alton Brown's recipe awhile back, and it was good and chewy.

 

I forgot to add xanthan gum to my gf apple cake for Christmas Eve, and it was apple crumble.  Oops.

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Not that that's all settled I'm going to color in the coloring book I bought myself for Christmas.

My husband works in commercial printing as a pressman. He came home about a month or two ago laughing about having to print an adult coloring book. All the guys at work were going on and on about how lame it was. I explained to him that they were actually very popular, and that I know this because of WTM. He was shocked.

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Dh smoked two large briskets and a large turkey breast for Christmas Eve.  We had seven adults, an adult who had already eaten, four teens, and a kid.  We ate most of one brisket.  He timed the turkey wrong so it was ready during dessert and no one ate but a bite to taste it.

 

For the past five days I have done everything with brisket possible.  Brisket plain, with bbq sauce, given the hard and fatty pieces to the dog, brisket nachos, and now brisket on baked potatoes.  The turkey is almost gone. YAY.  It's an odd problem to have, this overabundance of brisket.

 

 

How did he get all of that into the rolling paper...?

 

OH

 

OHHHHH!!

 

Ha ha! That is my thought every time I see that her dh smokes brisket!

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Now that that's all settled I'm going to color in the coloring book I bought myself for Christmas.

I really wanted one with some Prismacolor colored pencils. 

I didn't get either, but I didn't put it at the top of the list, so that's probably why. 

Oh well. I got other stuff from my list. 

 

 

 

In other news, DD sat and watched 30 minutes of the Nutcracker. Completely entranced. She then tried to do what they were doing. She's currently playing in the playroom, but comes to the living room, does a bow or twirl, then goes back to play. 

I'm thinking we're going to sign her up for dance at the Y. It's the one thing she consistently does and seems interested in. 

Edited by Southern Ivy
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OH, I REMEMBER WHAT TOOK MY BRAIN TODAY!!!  I worked on my syllabus for English class.  After that, I was toast.  I have to do more of it tomorrow.  Then I interacted with the general public at two different locations, which whipped me.

 

You know, if you're going to do all this work and brag about it, the least you can do is post the results.  For the imposters slackers goof balls fellow homeschool moms here.

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You know, if you're going to do all this work and brag about it, the least you can do is post the results.  For the imposters slackers goof balls fellow homeschool moms here.

Well, it's just a co-op class adapted version of the Jill Pike syllabus (WttW plus TtC) so it's not even that special. :lol:

 

I have been wrestling to give Hamlet proper treatment/time, as most of these kids have never been exposed to Shakespeare.*

 

*Spoiler - Everyone dies! :lol:

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Well, it's just a co-op class adapted version of the Jill Pike syllabus (WttW plus TtC) so it's not even that special. :lol:

 

I have been wrestling to give Hamlet proper treatment/time, as most of these kids have never been exposed to Shakespeare.*

 

*Spoiler - Everyone dies! :lol:

 

I'm stressing over next year, so EVERYTHING is special! :wacko:

 

 

(On the up-side, my kid is a huge fan of the Bard and has written just about everything he wrote, so I think that's covered, at least!)

 

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We just got a meat pack and have a pound of Italian sausage and I don't want soup. We already have goetta frozen so I need something new.

 

That will be so yummy.  If you have some winter greens, toss them in the sauce.  :thumbup1:   Sausage and greens loooooooove each other!  ( And I love them.  Which is why I'm going on a diet come January 1 :tongue_smilie: )

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I cheated and moved Lynn's OP here cuz I'm magical like that, and this is my safe place.   :hat: 


 


I'm just pondering feelings possibly referred to as imposter syndrome, where you constantly feel like you're not as good as you should be or as others are at something, and what causes it.  Perfectionism?  An example of work-a-holism?  Too much praise? 


I have struggled with this in many ways my entire life.  I think it is due to some perfectionism but also due to not being afraid of taking on new challenges.  I size things up quickly and generally decide if someone else can do it, so can I!  This is foreign to many people, evidently. :lol:  I recall once trying to pull off making a small wedding cake for some friends.  I had never worked with fondant, had about three hours until the party, and three small kids.  It was not advisable.  I decided against it, but I was at the store looking at stuff all ready to go.  I'm just crazy like that.  I jump in impulsively to many things and decide I'll figure it out as I go along.


 


If you have felt this way, did it keep you from going for something you later wished you had?  


 


Quite the opposite.  I end up doing things I probably have no business doing, but I do think that you tend to have more regrets about the things not done than the things done.


 


And, what do you think caused the imposter feelings?


 


It takes a long time to really become an expert at something.  I always felt slightly incompetent when I was teaching college courses.  They kept rehiring me semester after semester, and I got great student reviews, but I always felt I was not quite competent.  Like I needed to teach a class a few more times to reach that comfort level.  I'm not happy half-a$$ing something that is important like that, though.


 


Do you deliberately try to avoid the same pitfalls as you parent your own children?


 


My pitfall is a product of my personality and thus, unchangeable.  My kids have their own personalities and are, thus, unchangeable.  So no.  And I would rather they be like me and go boldly into the world trying new things than sitting and wondering what they could have done if and when they had tried.  My dh is very reserved and slow to commit and make decisions.  He misses out on things as a result.  Now, on the other hand, I jump into some things that don't go well.  (beekeeping comes to mind)


 


By doing so, do you think you've possibly created other problems or issues in your kids related to work and accomplishments?


 


I don't think so because, as stated above, my philosophy is that this is a personality trait for me, and I can't pass it along really.  My mom was always encouraging and if I wanted to do something, she found a way for me to do or try it.  I have no idea if I was any good at most of it, but I sure did get to try a lot of things.


Edited by texasmama
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I'm stressing over next year, so EVERYTHING is special! :wacko:

 

 

(On the up-side, my kid is a huge fan of the Bard and has written just about everything he wrote, so I think that's covered, at least!)

 

 

I stressed over 9th grade, too, but outsourcing has been my friend, and I am teaching the one subject I am competent in, though, as I stated in my above Lynn response, I don't feel competent the first (or second) time I teach something.  

Edited by texasmama
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I cheated and moved Lynn's OP here cuz I'm magical like that, and this is my safe place.   :hat: 

 

I'm just pondering feelings possibly referred to as imposter syndrome, where you constantly feel like you're not as good as you should be or as others are at something, and what causes it.  Perfectionism?  An example of work-a-holism?  Too much praise? 

I have struggled with this in many ways my entire life.  I think it is due to some perfectionism but also due to not being afraid of taking on new challenges.  I size things up quickly and generally decide if someone else can do it, so can I!  This is foreign to many people, evidently. :lol:  I recall once trying to pull off making a small wedding cake for some friends.  I had never worked with fondant, had about three hours until the party, and three small kids.  It was not advisable.  I decided against it, but I was at the store looking at stuff all ready to go.  I'm just crazy like that.  I jump in impulsively to many things and decide I'll figure it out as I go along.

 

If you have felt this way, did it keep you from going for something you later wished you had?  

 

Quite the opposite.  I end up doing things I probably have no business doing, but I do think that you tend to have more regrets about the things not done than the things done.

 

And, what do you think caused the imposter feelings?

 

It takes a long time to really become an expert at something.  I always felt slightly incompetent when I was teaching college courses.  They kept rehiring me semester after semester, and I got great student reviews, but I always felt I was not quite competent.  Like I needed to teach a class a few more times to reach that comfort level.  I'm not happy half-a$$ing something that is important like that, though.

 

Do you deliberately try to avoid the same pitfalls as you parent your own children?

 

My pitfall is a product of my personality and thus, unchangeable.  My kids have their own personalities and are, thus, unchangeable.  So no.  And I would rather they be like me and go boldly into the world trying new things than sitting and wandering what they could have done if and when they had tried.  My dh is very reserved and slow to commit and make decisions.  He misses out on things as a result.  Now, on the other hand, I jump into some things that don't go well.  (beekeeping comes to mind)

 

By doing so, do you think you've possibly created other problems or issues in your kids related to work and accomplishments?

 

I don't think so because, as stated above, my philosophy is that this is a personality trait for me, and I can't pass it along really.  My mom was always encouraging and if I wanted to do something, she found a way for me to do or try it.  I have no idea if I was any good at most of it, but I sure did get to try a lot of things.

 

 

Great idea, Tex!  I'd much prefer to have serious discussions here.  Just don't tell anyone out there, k?

 

 

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I struggle with perfectionism/imposter syndrome, and so does one of my kiddos.  I think it's inherent in our personalities.  For a long time, I let it hold me back from trying things. I wrote a paper for an adolescent psych class in undergrad on gifted adolescent females.  It helped me understand some of my own dynamics, and as I've gotten older, I've become more accepting of myself.  Somewhere around age 35, I just quit caring about what other people thought of me.  I still hate seeing my own errors as I learn new skills, but I feel free to make errors and acknowledge that's part of the process of developing new skills.

 

I have a crazy wedding story too. I was at the wedding rehearsal supper and I sat near the bride. I realized she had no lunch arranged for the bridal party and that a number of other things hadn't happened. I got home at 8pm, made 45 gift bags with snacks/customized coloring book/bubbles/etc. for the children attending the wedding and did the catering for a lunch for 30 people. It wasn't a big deal.  I knew I could, so I did.  I am embarrassed when people bring up my capabilities and I try to minimize them.  I am trying to work on finding a healthier way to handle those conversations.... but I'm sharing this story because I think you can probably relate.

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We took a day trip down to the beach today.  We froze a bit, and the wind was so strong that the bonfire burned through quickly, but my younger son had a blast exploring everything coming in on the big waves.  I am hoping he'll spend a chunk of time classifying shells tomorrow.  I still need to get a bunch of school planned!

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Lynn's post:

 

I'm just pondering feelings possibly referred to as imposter syndrome, where you constantly feel like you're not as good as you should be or as others are at something, and what causes it.  Perfectionism?  An example of work-a-holism?  Too much praise? 

 

If you have felt this way, did it keep you from going for something you later wished you had?

 

And, what do you think caused the imposter feelings?

 

Do you deliberately try to avoid the same pitfalls as you parent your own children?

 

By doing so, do you think you've possibly created other problems or issues in your kids related to work and accomplishments?

 

I've been thinking about this.  My first reaction was to reject the idea, and I'm having trouble getting over it. Honestly, I think I'm just so done with people being labeled that I just can't get over the label.  Which is dumb, I know, because it's just describing a tendency, but still.

 

I don't know that the idea applies to me.  I can say that I never really failed at any thing until I tried to have a baby.  Now that was pretty much a disaster, but I do have my absolutely fantabulous DD, so it wasn't a failure. My lack of failure was more the result of no really hard challenges, though, so I don't think it counts.

 

I think I'm more concerned about this as it applies to DD, though.  She's very smart, but not freakishly so.  She is just now bumping into things that are hard and it's kind of freaking her out.  Mostly, I really want to think about this to help her navigate the waters.

 

Hmmm.  Much to ponder...

 

Thank you, Lynn.

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I struggle with perfectionism/imposter syndrome, and so does one of my kiddos.  I think it's inherent in our personalities.  For a long time, I let it hold me back from trying things. I wrote a paper for an adolescent psych class in undergrad on gifted adolescent females.  It helped me understand some of my own dynamics, and as I've gotten older, I've become more accepting of myself.  Somewhere around age 35, I just quit caring about what other people thought of me.  I still hate seeing my own errors as I learn new skills, but I feel free to make errors and acknowledge that's part of the process of developing new skills.

 

I have a crazy wedding story too. I was at the wedding rehearsal supper and I sat near the bride. I realized she had no lunch arranged for the bridal party and that a number of other things hadn't happened. I got home at 8pm, made 45 gift bags with snacks/customized coloring book/bubbles/etc. for the children attending the wedding and did the catering for a lunch for 30 people. It wasn't a big deal.  I knew I could, so I did.  I am embarrassed when people bring up my capabilities and I try to minimize them.  I am trying to work on finding a healthier way to handle those conversations.... but I'm sharing this story because I think you can probably relate.

My sista. :hat:

Edited by texasmama
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Would you substitute Italian pork sausage for ground beef in lasagna? I've never made lasagna.

I would. If I made lasagna. But I don't. I buy it from a friend who makes it. It's a little spendy, but she's an amazing cook and the proceeds from her lasagna sales go to an orphanage in Thailand. So, I feel good about spending the money. That, and it's outrageously good lasagna. I'm not sure if she uses ground beef or italian pork sausage.
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My kind, gentle, and loving husband let me know that my recent diet is having negative repercussions with the phrase "You're getting large." There are probably 100 better ways to say that. Large. Large? I'm getting large. That's nice.

 

Dh used to call me hippo during pregnancy.  We both thought it was funny.  We thought it was even funnier when this came out:

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5v5XUpSlpBU

 

Girl, you huge!  :lol:   We still quote it all the time. 

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Regarding "imposter syndrome"

 

Tex, Prairie - that's fantastic!  I'm more like Tex's husband - reserved, slow to commit. 

 

I don't feel like I currently "suffer" so much.  I mean, I know I'm not a great housekeeper or cook, but I don't feel bad about that.  I accept that.  In fact, if anyone commented about how I should do it better, I would possibly tell them where to stick it.  I'm totally bored if friends start talking about cooking, gardening, where to find the best you-picks.  Just shoot me now.  I don't care.  (Clearly, no imposter feelings there!)

 

So, I don't think I go around with self-doubt, low self-esteem and lack of confidence in every area of life. 

 

I'm thinking more about why I didn't pursue something that I was pretty good at, piano.  I was a great student.  I was very confident.  I achieved plenty.  I don't remember my class rank, but I'm guessing within the top 10 students out of ~350.  I worked hard in highschool.  Overall, college was easier.  I had plenty of confidence, generally speaking.  I think, as far as piano goes, I had climbed a big hill (meaning, I stuck with it throughout highschool and was decent) and then realized there was a bigger mountain now in sight and convinced myself I'd never be good enough to compete against people trying to achieve that, so why try?  To be sure, there were other factors.  I began dating my future dh.  I was working part time and piano was my minor, not my major at college.  I just began going in another direction.  But I think I felt like I was barely making it, with piano.  Just sort of faking my way along.  That part might be a result of the perfectionism.  But I gave up something that had been a huge part of who I was, for most of my life.  And I regret it. 

 

So, clearly, I'm just rambling a bit.       

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Morning!

 

The cord to our slow cooker was stuck in the deep freezer door while we were gone, so I have a freezer full of icicles to clean out.

 

I have come to realize that in the rare occasion that something feels like a real risk, it is better for me to skip it. I usually come to regret it a great deal.

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Lynn, you're not rambling. Good thoughts.

 

I understand the feelings you are describing. I think for me, in similar circumstances throughout my life, it was fear. Fear of failure or fear of success. Failure is easy to understand; fear of success is a little harder to explain. If I succeeded, then what?

 

Then there are choices we make because of love and family. Could you do both well? Or would something suffer? Which is more important? For me, family. I had several opportunities to advance in the health care field, which I loved. I cried my eyes out when it was time to go back to work when Dd16 was 6 weeks. Long story. I ended up not going, and staying home with my children. Do I regret it? Sometimes, if I'm honest. But then, I think "look at these wonderful people". Would they have turned out so well? I don't know.

 

Deep thoughts. :D

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Dawn, glad you are feeling a bit better.

 

And, I know what you mean.  I always planned to stay home when I had kids.  By that time, I was an accountant.  I liked accounting pretty well, but I hated the business world, especially my job at the time, so staying home was a no-brainer.  And, yet, I had been so accomplishment driven all my life that even though I had planned to stay home it was still an adjustment. 

 

 

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Jean, I'm thinking about what you said about pride in the other thread.  I did not have the Asian culture parenting thing going on.  In fact, just the opposite.  I feel like my parents were always saying how proud they were of me.  And, yet, I knew from religious training that pride was a sin.  Older now, I understand different uses of the word, but even so, it was a bit of a mixed message. 

 

I think the praise and people taking pride in me or my accomplishments did create an expectation of continuing to accomplish with the growing feeling that the stakes were ever higher? 

 

AND someone else said (maybe it was Isabel) in one of the other related threads that praising involves judgement.  I do think I had been judgemental in my own heart towards others who didn't play as well as I did or who quit lessons at a younger age.  Once thinking those things about others who "failed," what would I think of myself if I also did?  (I might cross post this to the other thread..... I'm having a hard time replying over there.  There are SO many posts.)

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Did I tell anybody that DH got me the two books published by America's Test Kitchen on gluten free baking? I'm looking forward to teaching the boys how to bake good GF chewy chocolate chip cookies.

 

I *LOVE* America's Test Kitchen. I bet that's the best GF cookbook *ever*. :party:

 

And BOOYA!!!!!!

 

That's all I got...

Edited by Ellie
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Lynn, I've been thinking about this "imposter" thing, kind of trying to wrap my mind around what you're talking about. And I'm still not exactly sure I get it. But for me, I have always had very low confidence. I feel like I do have abilities, but for some reason, in regards to myself, I have this idea that if it's not an "A" it's an "F". If I don't completely succeed at things, then I have utterly failed. I know this is not healthy or realistic and it sure keeps me from doing a lot of things because I'm afraid to try. But I've been this way all my life, I've even been through counseling and I still think this way about myself. And I still care waaaaay too much about what others think about me for a 47 year old woman.

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