Please help me to feed my son!

[Just Kate]

My ds is PICKY, PICKY, PICKY and I am having a terrible time getting healthy food in him. Right now, he will eat pizza, turkey sandwhiches (made on white bread, deli meat turkey, and a slice of cheddar cheese), hot dog, waffles, pancakes, blueberries, strawberries, bananas, and apple sauce. When I make dinner (some kind of chicken, cooked veggies, rice...something like that) he just picks at it.

 

I know he isn't getting enough protein. Any suggestions for how to make what he is eating healthier? Or any thoughts on how I could get him to eat a wider variety of foods? I am interested in homemade pancake or waffle recipes that are healthier. Right now he likes Eggo waffles, and those can't be good for him long-term.

 

We have been dealing with food issues forever. He does have some sensory issues and I am considering seeking out an occupational therapist. He is already seeing a psychologist for anxiety.

 

Oh, he is 10 years old and this has really been an ongoing problem his whole life (well, since about age 3).  I recently bought a probiotic and a liquid vitamin (won't do chewables or pills) and he refuses to take them.

 

I personally eat a very whole foods, low-carb diet, so it frustrates me to have to bring food that I don't think it healthy into the house. I know I could refuse to do so, but then I really don't think he would eat. I am happy to hear other opinions about this thought. I feel like I am at the end of my rope.

 

He also eats goldfish and lots of cookies (he will eat a lot of cookies if given the chance). I have thought about making homemade, healthier crackers, but I wonder if he would eat them.

 

I know this is disjointed and all over the place. I would love to hear what you would do in my situation...or what you have done. I was a picky kid too, but no where near ds. Food is becoming a giant battle between us, which I know is not healthy. 

 

Thanks!

[Aiden]

For protein in pancakes, add whey protein powder. My husband occasionally gets a hankering for pancakes, and we've discovered that adding some vanilla protein powder adds a really nice flavor. The recipe we use is here: http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Good-Old-Fashioned-Pancakes/Detail.aspx . We just add a scoop or so of protein powder ... I think my husband has developed some kind of formula (add this much protein, decrease flour to this, etc), but I don't know his formula, and I do know that the first couple of times we did it, we just added protein and it turned out well.

 

Protein powder may even be a good temporary solution to get the protein intake up while you work on the other things--add to milk for chocolate or vanilla milk, for example. Half a scoop is enough to meet my daughter's protein needs for a full day. We try not to give it to her too often, since she does eat meats and such, but she sees her daddy drinking it and wants some too.

[Alenee]

From one mom with a sensory kid to another :grouphug:  DD12 is super picky still.  Our biggest battle now is over cooked vegetables.  Imo, keep making dinners you want to see him try and let the rest go.  However, maybe see if he can do smoothies with all that fruit he likes.  Any chance you can make them green and get those liquid vitamins into him?  Dd's pickiness got a little better after our naturopath tested her and prescribed specific supplements for her but it's still hard to watch her push away food. 

 

On a side note, I was just as picky but now I love a lot of things my mom was always trying to get me to eat.  Most of my food issues are sensory as well.

[Ann.without.an.e]

Will he drink a fruit smoothie?  You can add stevia if he likes things really sweet.  You can slip in some unflavored or vanilla whey protein powder? 

[73349]

You might like the book Child of Mine by Ellyn Satter. I agree that an OT would also help.

[Just Kate]

Protein powder is a great idea. I have an unflavored one that I use to make smoothies for myself. I have offered him smoothies, but he refuses to try.

 

Tell me your thoughts on making smoothies. He doesn't like the flavor of yogurt, so I wonder if a yogurt-based smoothie would be too tangy. How else can I make a fruit smoothie? Just milk, fruit, and protein powder? Would added honey taste good?

 

He used to love chocolate milkshakes, but now he says they hurt his stomach. I think this is why he doesn't want to drink a smoothie. (He does drink chocolate milk with dinner every night though and it doesn't hurt his stomach...I use organic milk and homemade chocolate syrup).

 

Any other thoughts? I think I will try adding protein powder to homemade waffles and pancakes. How bad is it if he eats them for breakfast every morning? 

[City Mouse]

He is not as restricted in his food choices as some kids I have heard about so that is good.

 

One way to introduce new foods is to have things that are very similar to things he currently eats. For example, when I had a kid that would only eat chicken nuggets, very slowly we added other "nugget" type foods -fish nuggets, fried shrimp etc. You said he eats Eggo frozen waffles. Try giving him the nutrigrain Frozen waffles. I thing they are also Eggo brand, so the will look similar. Once he will heat different brands of frozen waffles, then you could try homemade ones.

Try giving him plain cheddar cheese slices since he will eat it on the sandwich. Once he will do that, you could try crackers with cheese. Then, you might be able to go to peanut butter on crackers.

 

Try different kinds of hot dogs. My kids did not like the more expensive all-beef hot dogs, but they would eat the slightly healthier low fat turkey hot dogs. My son got to where he would eat smoked sausage hot dogs, then regular so mocked sausage. It is not really much healthier but just a slightly wider variety of foods.

 

There are cookbooks that have recipies for sneaking extra nutrition into foods by using vegetable purée but I can think of the names right now. That might or might not work for your son.

 

While my DD19 food choices have expanded enough that she can usually find something at a restaurant that she will eat, she still does not like any vegetables and can't swallow pills.

[Night Elf]

Ds18 is a picky eater. I'd be happy if I could get him to eat veggies and fruits. His most favorite thing is chicken. I buy Tyson frozen ready grilled (or whatever it's called) chicken for him. We alternate dinner nights for things he likes and things he doesn't like. We taught him how to prepare the foods he likes and he cooks for himself on the nights he doesn't like our dinner. The frozen chicken is what he has most often. He'll eat boxed pasta and has that sometimes.

 

It took me a while, but I got him to start trying new foods. He'll take a bite of most anything we ask him to eat, but I can't think of many times he's decided he likes something well enough to try it again.

 

When he decides to give up a food, he doesn't have a replacement so his food likes has dwindled for the past 14 years. It's crazy. His most recent item is applesauce. All of a sudden he stopped liking it. I tried every brand at the grocery store and he doesn't like any of them. It's been a few months and I found one this weekend I'll have him try. But I'll be surprised if he decides he likes it.

[momacacia]

He sounds like a prime candidate for the GAPS diet.

 

One way to start (without doing something like GAPS) is just to remove all the junk from the house. Have good snacks like you eat, but no goldfish, cookies, white bread, etc. I hear people say a lot that "my kid won't eat that etc," but more often I think kids eat what their parents allow them to eat. If all that's around are figs and walnuts for a snack and they're hungry enough ... And lunch is turkey slices, guacamole, broccoli and sweet potato, well ... Get excited about one of those! ;-) My 9yo gets to have root beer on occasion when we eat out because I say "yes." It's my fault. And, with just a little more energy I can say "no" and eventually we all know we only drink water when we go out.

 

We have done the GAPS protocol (for epilepsy) and been round and round about food. We are heading back in the direction of GAPS after allowing a lot of SAD food. It is hard to change these things. I'd also include a probiotic and something like sauerkraut to help change his taste buds. Maybe even try 1 spoonful of bubbies kraut for 1 goldfish. His tastes will change as the good foods win over bad. Eating is a habit and very ritualistic. He's also got gut-brain chemical things going on to make him crave certain foods. You will have to fight for him to change.

 

I know some families with sensory and food issues have good success with ABA therapy. I don't know anything about it, but might be worth looking into. (I think that what it's called.)

[Twigs]

Here is a recent thread about a picky eater.

 

http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/topic/520322-update-on-my-picky-eater-started-feeding-therapy-and-its-working/

 

Best wishes.

[maize]

Sometimes kids are more willing to try something new if they help prepare it. You could have him look through a cookbook with colorful pictures and choose something to try, then shop together for the ingredients and prepare the dish together.

 

Someone mentioned hiding vegetable purees in food, I think the Sneaky Chef is the title of one book that gives recommendations for doing so.

[medawyn]

IF he doesn't see you making them, maybe these cottage cheese pancakes for breakfast? http://weelicious.com/2010/10/05/cottage-cheese-pancakes/

 

(I don't add the salt or use salt-free cottage cheese)  My super picky DH will eat them, and he's an expert at finding "hidden" food.  I serve them with "fruit syrup" which is basically one bag of frozen fruit cooked down, with 1-3 tbsp of maple syrup or honey added + 1-2 tbsp cornstarch.  Raspberries and strawberries are the biggest hits here.

 

I do lots of smoothies - try almond milk or coconut milk as a base (plus your protein powder).  I usually don't use yogurt because I find it makes the consistency too thick (and yes, tangy).  If he helps make them (or watches what goes in?) will it help him try a smoothie?  If you can get him started on smoothies, it might be a good place to slip in some new fruits or even veggies.

 

Good luck!  :grouphug:

[Kalmia]

My healthy and as protein-packed-as-I-can-make-them pancake/waffle recipe for my picky eater:

 

1.5 cups King Arthur Organic Whole Wheat Flour (this is the only whole wheat flour I've found that is ground finely enough to sub for white flour)
2 tablespoons King Arthur Organic White Flour (gives them a little "lift")

2 teaspoons baking powder (I use Rumford aluminum-free)

1 teaspoon fine ground sea salt
3 pastured organic eggs

1 tablespoon organic olive oil or melted pasture butter

1 cup organic pastured milk (you could substitute almond milk if there is a lactose issue)

 

Real maple syrup as a topping

 

Do not stir this recipe until the griddle is ready. This recipe is pretty forgiving so you can increase the amounts of dry ingredients a bit without throwing it off.

 

Note: the first pancake off the griddle never tastes as good as subsequent pancakes. I have no idea why. We compost that one.

 

 

 

[Cakes]

Here is a smoothie idea, I would suggest you take it in stages and have low expectations at the start!

 

Use blueberries or strawberries (frozen) and banana. Use a little water to thin and add in a small amount (not full serving) of vanilla protein powder. 

 

Make a smoothie daily, even if he won't drink it. Make one when you know he is hungry and encourage him to just drink a little. Eventually he will likely get used to the idea and at least drink some of it.

 

Slowly replace the water with 1/2c coconut milk (good source of healthy fat) and 1/2c water.  Eventually you may be able to play around with adding SMALL amounts of raw kale or spinach ( this is another reason the coconut milk fat is important, for his body to make use of the fat soluble vits in the greens) you can't taste the greens but you can see them, so go very slowly. To this you can also add liquid vitamins, minerals etc

 

Good luck!

[Sandragood1]

You may want to take a look at this book: What's Eating Your Child by Kelly Doefman. The author is a pediatric nutritionist. She has good information and strategies.

[msrift]

I also have an extremely picky son, probably with sensory issues. He is one of those kids who *would* starve to death rather than eat something not on his list. We tried the whole you'll eat what you're served thing when he was 2-3 and he didn't eat for two and a half days. Caught him eating paper instead. My worst parenting moment ever. 

Do your best not to turn it into a battle. I second the pp who said to try to slowly expand using what he will eat (which is really quite a bit) into newer foods. Try to give him the control so food doesn't seem like the enemy. 

You mentioned he likes cheddar cheese. Try taking him to the deli aisle or a farmer's market where he can see all the different varieties of just cheddar cheese. See if he'll try one. If he won't try it, see if he'll just lick it or smell it. Baby steps. Once he'll try different cheddars, branch out. Same with the bread. He likes applesauce. Try making/buying different varieties.

With kids like this I don't recommend sneaking healthy ingredients into food that they already like. A slight taste difference might turn them off it completely. (Speaking from experience) But if ds is a willing participant in a taste test, go for it. 

Good luck!

[Nemom]

No one knows your child better than you do so please forgive me if you have been down this road already or know it is not an issues for your son.

 

Have you had your son tested for food allergies or intolerances? I have a 12yr old who struggled with eating, weight gain, and anxiety/mood issues for years. After many Dr appts and years, we finally discovered that she has multiple food allergies and intolerances along with a much more serious health issue.

 

Some of the foods she was allergic to she would avoid and some she was eating everyday and even asking for. After removing the offending foods-she improved greatly including all those anxiety/mood issues that she had been having.

 

Oat flour is a healthy alternative and can be used to make pancakes, cookies and cakes. It is pretty tasty too in my opinion. Google oat flour recipes and you will find quite a bit. I use oat flour alone and without any whole wheat or white flour. Works great after some trial and error.

[Acadie]

My oldest was very picky until we figured out her food intolerances.  It's possible he's trying to self-manage stomach pain or other intolerance symptoms by restricting food, and if you can get to the bottom of symptoms and what causes them he'd feel comfortable expanding his diet more.  If he says chocolate milkshakes hurt his tummy, could he have reflux?  Corn starch and corn syrup are my girls' worst reflux trigger, and they're in so many processed foods.

 

He craves sugars and carbs, which means he has yeast overgrowth.  Don't offer him more carbs, like honey in a smoothie.  You can use stevia if it needs sweetening, or try just banana, blueberry, a little something green and water.  The banana is so sweet itself.  I think you're on the right track trying to up his protein and veggies, rather than fruit/starch/sweeteners.  You could think about treating the yeast to ease the cravings, too.  Candex or you could talk to your ped about Nystatin.

 

Amy

 

 

 

 

[Eagle]

If he helps to prepare food he should be more likely to eat it. A good children's cookbook is Honest Pretzels. My son wouldn't eat yogurt, but the first recipe he wanted to make in the book was a maple yogurt dip (because he loves maple syrup). He was very proud that he made it himself and proclaimed it delicious. He won't dip anything in it, but he eats it every day. He has since tried many more recipes from the book and has not found one yet that he doesn't like.

[redsquirrel]

I have a picky eater due to sensory issues as well. He will eat baked goods, like bread, waffles, pancakes, muffins so I use the Cornell Formula.

 

from each cup of white flour, subtract 3 tablespoons of flour and add:

1 tablespoon wheat germ

1 tablespoon soy flour

1 tablespoon dry milk

 

This makes bread and all baked goods much healthier. The milk and soy combine with the proteins that are in wheat to make a complete protein. It was created back in the day as a way to help people who could get bread, but not enough protein.

 

I use this formula for cookies, muffins, waffles, bread, brownies, pizza dough etc etc.

 

It is very easy to make pancakes and waffles and freeze them, so you always have enough.

 

And he prob is getting enough protein. A true lack of protein causes all kinds of weird health problems and is actually very rare. You say he is eating turkey and hot dogs and pizza so he is getting enough.  Even fruits have some protein, not much but they do have some.

 

The cookbooks where you add pureed veggies are called "Deceptively Delicious" and "Sneaky Chef" I have both, got them at yard sales, and find them to be fairly useless. The recipes call for such small amounts of veggie puree that I can't imagine there is any actual nutrition added. I know that .5 cup of veggies is a serving. I guess if you made everything someone ate with added purees you could maybe sneak in a serving in a day?

 

I would def talk to his psychologist about a referral to an eating clinic or an OT who deals with food issues. For his eating problem to be getting worse as he gets older is really challenging. It has been a seriously long haul with my now 9 year old, but it is getting better because he has more experience and we can talk about it more reasonably.

 

But I do want to offer my support. I know that kicked in the gut feeling when they take a food of their approved list. It causes such a panic.

 

[Just Kate]

No one knows your child better than you do so please forgive me if you have been down this road already or know it is not an issues for your son.

 

Have you had your son tested for food allergies or intolerances? I have a 12yr old who struggled with eating, weight gain, and anxiety/mood issues for years. After many Dr appts and years, we finally discovered that she has multiple food allergies and intolerances along with a much more serious health issue.

 

Some of the foods she was allergic to she would avoid and some she was eating everyday and even asking for. After removing the offending foods-she improved greatly including all those anxiety/mood issues that she had been having.

 

Oat flour is a healthy alternative and can be used to make pancakes, cookies and cakes. It is pretty tasty too in my opinion. Google oat flour recipes and you will find quite a bit. I use oat flour alone and without any whole wheat or white flour. Works great after some trial and error.

 

 

My oldest was very picky until we figured out her food intolerances.  It's possible he's trying to self-manage stomach pain or other intolerance symptoms by restricting food, and if you can get to the bottom of symptoms and what causes them he'd feel comfortable expanding his diet more.  If he says chocolate milkshakes hurt his tummy, could he have reflux?  Corn starch and corn syrup are my girls' worst reflux trigger, and they're in so many processed foods.

 

He craves sugars and carbs, which means he has yeast overgrowth.  Don't offer him more carbs, like honey in a smoothie.  You can use stevia if it needs sweetening, or try just banana, blueberry, a little something green and water.  The banana is so sweet itself.  I think you're on the right track trying to up his protein and veggies, rather than fruit/starch/sweeteners.  You could think about treating the yeast to ease the cravings, too.  Candex or you could talk to your ped about Nystatin.

 

Amy

 

I have wondered about food intolerances/allergies. The problem with ds is much larger, as usual. To make a long story short...a few months ago he felt like he choked on food (I was there, he didn't actually choke) and he became even pickier. He had trouble swallowing after that and I started thinking that his swallowing problem, along with the stomach aches he had frequently had, might mean a bigger problem. We took him to his pediatrician who did blood work. Everything came back fine. We went to see a Pediatric GI and he did an endoscopy. Everything came back fine. I asked if we should do allergy testing and both said no. We are also seeing a child psychologist for anxiety, so everyone assumed that his issues are "in his head" (maybe they didn't say it that way, but that is what I heard).

 

I have since read that picky eating and kids with gut problems go hand in hand. I think there might be some truth to that with ds, but I don't know what to do about it.

 

I was seriously hoping that a problem would be found through the endoscopy. Nothing bad, of course. But just something that could be easily fixed.

 

Ds is a difficult kid already. Actually, he CAN be a difficult kid (more often than the average kid). But he can also be sweet and awesome. It is honestly like he has two personalities.

 

I keep feeling like part of his problem is that he eats such a crappy diet. 

 

I want to help him. He is just miserable a lot of the time. But he makes it so difficult. :(

 

(Sorry...I am having a really bad day with him. I know my posts are probably disjointed, but there is just so much going on with him and I want to help. He has always been difficult, but of course a difficult kid is so much easier when they are little. He acts like a moody teenager. It is frustrating)

[Just Kate]

 

But I do want to offer my support. I know that kicked in the gut feeling when they take a food of their approved list. It causes such a panic.

 

Thank you for your entire post. But I wanted to touch on what you said here. Right now, turkey sandwiches are THE thing. He wants to eat several a day. By the time school starts and I have to pack his lunch again, he will refuse to eat a turkey sandwich. This goes on and on with every food he eats. I have worried a lot about letting him eat so much bread (pancakes, waffles, etc.). I guess I will just work on healthier recipes, make a ton, and freeze them. I have also wondered if taking gluten out of his diet might help. But honestly, the thought of doing that overwhelms me. (even though I eat an almost gluten free diet). 

[redsquirrel]

Ok, so he goes on jags as well as limiting his diet. Have you told his psychologist about this. That can be an OCD thing or might be related to the anxiey.

 

 

And my son is picky due to sensory issues but has no gut issues. He has no stomach pain or problems digesting anything. He never complains about not feeling well. He is super healthy and has never been sick beyond an occasional sniffle. He has never been on antibiotics. His bathroom habits are well within normal. His skin is soft and his eyes are clear. His teeth are fine.  I am so glad because his diet is small enough that I don't want to limit it more than it already is.

 

[Nemom]

I have wondered about food intolerances/allergies. The problem with ds is much larger, as usual. To make a long story short...a few months ago he felt like he choked on food (I was there, he didn't actually choke) and he became even pickier. He had trouble swallowing after that and I started thinking that his swallowing problem, along with the stomach aches he had frequently had, might mean a bigger problem.

These are actually symptoms of something called Eosinophilic Esophagitis. I am going to send you a PM.

[MiMi 4under3]

He also eats goldfish and lots of cookies (he will eat a lot of cookies if given the chance). 

 

Cut out all goldfish and cookies!

 

If he's filling up on snacks, he's probably not truly hungry at meal times.