StephanieZ Posted August 24, 2013 Share Posted August 24, 2013 It is that kind of day. Or week. JAWM, please. My dd's instrument teacher is a bit, uhh, unstable. She's taught dd 9 years (and dd had studied for about 18 mos with a different teacher before we moved here). It's an unusual instrument, and we don't live in a huge urban area, so the next closest teacher is about 100 miles away. Dd's teacher sent out a notice today that, as of Jan1, her lesson rates will go from $48 to $124/hr. Yes, you read that right. We live in a low wage area. She already has a very small studio (typically maybe 10 students total, most for just half an hour, not more than 4 kids/teens, and the rest retirees learning for fun.) The teacher is good at music. However, she is, as I said, uh, well, unstable. So, dd has less than 2 years before leaving for college. She enjoys instrument study, it is a serious extra-curricular, but not what she plans to study in college. I'd already written off ever trusting the teacher to write college rec.s b/c she is unpredictable. So, really, this is not a huge big deal. Dd just has to transition to the college/adult period of playing for fun/recreation/spare money now instead of later. I did let the teacher know we won't be continuing lessons at the new rate, and there is some chance she'll change her mind, as I predict she will lose all or nearly all of her students due to this (if not the other erratic things she's been doing lately). But, one way or another, I have a feeling this relationship is ending sooner rather than later. UGH! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted August 24, 2013 Share Posted August 24, 2013 That's really disappointing. It sounds like your dd is taking it well, though. Leaving an instrument teacher sort of feels like losing a family member. What with the practice time all week, it's so integrated into your lives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dana Posted August 24, 2013 Share Posted August 24, 2013 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whereneverever Posted August 24, 2013 Share Posted August 24, 2013 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElizabethB Posted August 24, 2013 Share Posted August 24, 2013 At that level, I would think an over the Internet lesson would work, that could expand your teacher options, unless it is something like the harp. Any other instrument should be be fine with an Internet lesson at the higher levels, I would think. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted August 24, 2013 Share Posted August 24, 2013 Wow. Sorry about the lessons. Video lessons sounds like a great idea. Does the teacher have family in town who will also see the changes in her behavior? It makes me wonder about dementia or a brain tumor or something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmos Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 At that level, I would think an over the Internet lesson would work, that could expand your teacher options, unless it is something like the harp. Any other instrument should be be fine with an Internet lesson at the higher levels, I would think. I've never heard of internet music lessons before. Huh. Do you know of any resources for finding a teacher this way? Why would harp be different from other instruments? Just curious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 Wow. That is absolutely insane!!! I would be so angry! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElizabethB Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 I've never heard of internet music lessons before. Huh. Do you know of any resources for finding a teacher this way? Why would harp be different from other instruments? Just curious. For trumpet, for example, here is one person who offers Internet lessons: http://www.davidoneill.com/On-LineLessions.html If I were looking, I would find a good trumpet chat forum and take recommendations. Harp is large, it might be hard to see fingering errors or see what is being done over an Internet camera. But, I have only played brass instruments and piano, so harp might actually work online, I don't know. A beginner needs help different from an advanced player. Most advanced players know enough that an Internet lesson would work almost as well as a live lesson. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mama Geek Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 Since you don't say what instrument it is, it might not be possible but what about just joining a local symphony? I have a friend that played in high school and hadn't touched it for a lot of years. He picked up his instrument and started practicing and joined the small city symphony where he played for a couple of years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StephanieZ Posted August 25, 2013 Author Share Posted August 25, 2013 She already has a good bit of experience playing with local orchestras, even repeat paid orchestra jobs. The teacher may well try to prevent access to orchestras, as she has really gone off the deep end and can be very punitive whenever we have declined to participate in anything, so i am expecting retaliation for me letting her know that we can't continue lessons after the price increase. I will pursue more orchestra stuff for her in the spring. Yes, some sort of mental illness is plausible, as is dementia. She lives with her spouse and her adult children are nearby, so i will trust that they will do whatever they have to do. Sadly, it was not a typo. She was very explicit. And, yes, lol, it is the harp. :) I was trying to be discreet, but I give up. Our former teacher from nine years ago is fantastic, and is just 200 miles away, but near my mom. I will likely ask her abut doing monthly lessons, just coaching dd on wedding repertoire, etc. just to ease dd's transition away from weekly lessons. Thanks for the sympathy. It really is hard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 Ok, your teacher is a nutbunny. 48 an hour would be extremely reasonable, but jumping to that level in one swoop? And she only has 10 students? Yep - what a nutbunny. Our local music school does online lessons AND they do harp. They are a large program and highly regarded. I will PM you their website. They give discounts for daytime lessons with homeschoolers too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sparkle Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 Wow. That is ridiculous. I'd be curious to know how many of her students will stay with her. I'm sorry, for your dd's sake, and I hope she can find an alternative. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zillymom Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 And, yes, lol, it is the harp. :) I was trying to be discreet, but I give up. Pedal harp, right? (I'm assuming, since you mentioned orchestra). There are some pedal harp teachers with great credentials listed on the AHS site who teach via Skype: http://www.harpsociety.org/resources/teachersdirectory.asp That is a crazy increase in fees! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 She already has a good bit of experience playing with local orchestras, even repeat paid orchestra jobs. The teacher may well try to prevent access to orchestras, as she has really gone off the deep end and can be very punitive whenever we have declined to participate in anything, so i am expecting retaliation for me letting her know that we can't continue lessons after the price increase. I will pursue more orchestra stuff for her in the spring. Yes, some sort of mental illness is plausible, as is dementia. She lives with her spouse and her adult children are nearby, so i will trust that they will do whatever they have to do. Sadly, it was not a typo. She was very explicit. And, yes, lol, it is the harp. :) I was trying to be discreet, but I give up. Our former teacher from nine years ago is fantastic, and is just 200 miles away, but near my mom. I will likely ask her abut doing monthly lessons, just coaching dd on wedding repertoire, etc. just to ease dd's transition away from weekly lessons. Thanks for the sympathy. It really is hard. Another thought is to ask the teacher 200 miles away if she'd be willingly to do lessons via Skype, and then you could periodically have a live lesson with her periodically. That could be a great option if she was willing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lexi Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 No way on the local teacher! Do online lessons! http://www.macphail.org/ They offer harp. My dd took some online piano lessons from there and her teacher was wonderful! It was a great experience. There's a review on my blog. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donna Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 I was going to suggest asking the former teacher to do weekly Skype lessons (or FaceTime which is sometimes better timing-wise) with an occasional in-person lesson. My dd's fiddle teacher has this sort of arrangement with students who live very far away. An increase like that is ridiculous...a normal cost of living increase is reasonable but that is outrageous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 No way on the local teacher! Do online lessons! http://www.macphail.org/ They offer harp. My dd took some online piano lessons from there and her teacher was wonderful! It was a great experience. There's a review on my blog. LOL - that's where I IMed her about. My kids do lessons there locally. It's a great program. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StephanieZ Posted August 26, 2013 Author Share Posted August 26, 2013 update: PLEASE don't quote. I will likely delete later. [deleted] Anyway, it completely sucks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawana Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 You are right. It completely, utterly sucks. I am so sorry you have to deal with all that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 Whoa, I'm sorry. She sounds pretty unhinged. <3 <3 <3 (((hugs))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunnyDays Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 Yowzers. What a saga. I completely understand your latest decision, I wouldn't allow it either. Sorry you're dealing with this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 It's a rotten situation but you are doing the right thing. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 I think you are warding off what could be a very bad experience on this trip. Good for you for canceling, I hope your dd understands. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G5052 Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 I think you are warding off what could be a very bad experience on this trip. Good for you for canceling, I hope your dd understands. Yes, it sounds like this is the time to move on. Sometime you have to accept that things are less than ideal for awhile, but in the long run I suspect that you'll be glad you left when you did. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StephanieZ Posted August 26, 2013 Author Share Posted August 26, 2013 Thanks for the support. Dd is a very sweet and understanding girl, thankfully. [deleted] I think it'll all work out OK. I do hope that CTL gets on some meds or gets whatever help she needs. We'll be keeping our distance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 I glad it's all working out for the best for your dd. It's a shame that CTL turned out to be such a nut. I hope her other students' moms were as diligent as you were in protecting their children from her craziness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StephanieZ Posted August 26, 2013 Author Share Posted August 26, 2013 I glad it's all working out for the best for your dd. It's a shame that CTL turned out to be such a nut. I hope her other students' moms were as diligent as you were in protecting their children from her craziness. Me, too. :( [deleted] :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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