but you are going to go to a REAL doctor, right?

[ktgrok]

No mom. The Licensed Midwife i am seeing is totally able to oversee my pregnancy. Yes mom, things are in place if I have to transfer to a hospital. No Mom, I wouldn't force the midwife to see me even if she said I was high risk and needed a doctor (???). Yes Mom, I know you worry about me having a homebirth. (and no mom, I won't call you in labor, just like i didn't call you last time)

[Jennifer in MI]

No mom. The Licensed Midwife i am seeing is totally able to oversee my pregnancy. Yes mom, things are in place if I have to transfer to a hospital. No Mom, I wouldn't force the midwife to see me even if she said I was high risk and needed a doctor (???). Yes Mom, I know you worry about me having a homebirth. (and no mom, I won't call you in labor, just like i didn't call you last time)

 

Ha! I had this same conversation with my MIL with my first child. But he was born in a birth center IN a hospital! Why she was concerned, I don't know.

 

We decided not to tell her about the homebirth!

[justLisa]

LOL. I LOVED my midwives. I cannot believe I was so clueless with my first. I just thought you find a doc, go to hospital and push a baby out. Yeah. That is definitely how it goes.

[ktgrok]

Ha! I had this same conversation with my MIL with my first child. But he was born in a birth center IN a hospital! Why she was concerned, I don't know.

 

We decided not to tell her about the homebirth!

 

This is my second homebirth. Last pregnancy was MISERABLE for me, as she would ambush me, cry, yell, etc every time she saw me...guilt trips from HELL about the homebirth....of course SHE cared more about her babies than anything else....as if I didn't. Ugh. So I didn't tell her I was in labor until I was pushing..(and they live over 3 hours away). She said later that I was just lucky, and that if she had been there she would have called 911 when I went into labor.

 

This pregnancy I held off even telling her I was pregnant for a month, just so I didn't have to deal with this stuff. She said she was supportive this time, and not as worried...so that was great. But it seems the worry has begun again....sigh....

[Jennifer in MI]

This is my second homebirth. Last pregnancy was MISERABLE for me, as she would ambush me, cry, yell, etc every time she saw me...guilt trips from HELL about the homebirth....of course SHE cared more about her babies than anything else....as if I didn't. Ugh. So I didn't tell her I was in labor until I was pushing..(and they live over 3 hours away). She said later that I was just lucky, and that if she had been there she would have called 911 when I went into labor.

 

This pregnancy I held off even telling her I was pregnant for a month, just so I didn't have to deal with this stuff. She said she was supportive this time, and not as worried...so that was great. But it seems the worry has begun again....sigh....

 

She'd have called 911? Wow. I can see why you held off telling her. :grouphug:

 

For my homebirth, I had to see the doctor back up one time. So, I made sure to tell my MIL about that visit ONLY!! Do you have to do that? Maybe that would alleviate some of her fear.

[ktgrok]

She'd have called 911? Wow. I can see why you held off telling her. :grouphug:

 

For my homebirth, I had to see the doctor back up one time. So, I made sure to tell my MIL about that visit ONLY!! Do you have to do that? Maybe that would alleviate some of her fear.

 

I did last time, as it was my first VBAC, but this time I don't have to as my "risk factor" is back down due to a successful vaginal birth last time.

 

This is worse because my mom was a nurse way back in the day (remember the little hats?) and thinks Doctors know everything. Which is funny, because no nurses I know now think that.

[Munchkins_mama]

My mom barged in to one of my midwife appts and interrogated my MW about her qualifications to deliver babies. Seriously. I about died. The MW handled it very calmly and then told me she gets it a lot from the 'modern' women who seem to have forgotten that women have been having babies for millennia with just the help of other women.

[ktgrok]

My mom barged in to one of my midwife appts and interrogated my MW about her qualifications to deliver babies. Seriously. I about died. The MW handled it very calmly and then told me she gets it a lot from the 'modern' women who seem to have forgotten that women have been having babies for millennia with just the help of other women.

 

Wow, I had a dream the other night that basically was that situation. Mom at my midwife appointment. How awful.

[Momof3littles]

Ha! I had this same conversation with my MIL with my first child. But he was born in a birth center IN a hospital! Why she was concerned, I don't know.

 

We decided not to tell her about the homebirth!

:iagree: MIL called up my mom to complain. Except, MIL had no idea what a MW even was. WHen I asked her she said, "someone who delivers Amish babies?"

 

Cool to criticize when you know absolutely nothing about their education and professional training. And yes, this was a CNM attended birth in a hospital LOL.

 

We went on to have a FSBC birth and later a HB. She kept her mouth shut (to us and my mom) about those, however.

[linguistmama]

Ugh! :grouphug: With dd2 my mom thought I should see an ob (not even a family doc) because sometimes my blood sugar gets low if I don't eat for 4-5 hours. Yes, me and many other women! I love how obviously you have no clue how an emergency would be handled etc, right? :glare:

[ktgrok]

Ugh! :grouphug: With dd2 my mom thought I should see an ob (not even a family doc) because sometimes my blood sugar gets low if I don't eat for 4-5 hours. Yes, me and many other women! I love how obviously you have no clue how an emergency would be handled etc, right? :glare:

 

The MOST annoying thing is she keeps implying (ok, and directly SAYING) that she is worried I would go against medical advice, and against the midwife's advice, and stick with a homebirth even if something went wrong and I needed to transfer. It is just insulting, really. I don't have a death wish, and you would think after my wonderful/safe/fast/easy homebirth last time, compared to my sister's nightmare trainwreck of a hospital birth, that she would get it just a little bit. But no. I'm an idiot that can't be trusted with my own medical decisions.

[justamouse]

:grouphug:

[Sara in AZ]

I can so relate to you!!!!! So sorry you have to listen to that. My last pregnancy was so stressful because of my mother. I basically stopped talking to her for weeks. We carried on these crazy, intense e-mail debates. We ordinarily have a wonderful relationship, and she is very supportive of my choices usually. But this really strained it for a while. I did feel extremely insulted that she did not trust me, and all the thinly veiled, "I don't know how your midwife does things, but...." comments drove me over the edge.

[VeganCupcake]

:grouphug: Yikes! I can totally relate!

 

I don't talk to my mom about my births *at all* for this reason. With my first, she said, "You're not thinking about having this baby at home, are you?" and I totally fibbed and told her maybe, even though I most definitely did plan to have the baby at home (and did). My MIL is just as bad; she said she would come and sit in her car outside the house and worry while I was in labor.

 

I never call anyone until after baby is in my arms. I don't need people breathing down my neck, even from afar, while I'm birthing! I also totally fudge my due date and tell people I'm due about a month after I really am. :lol:

[WistfulRidge]

I can relate, too.

 

My mother wasn't that outspoken against my second birth (first HB) but she was like uber-helicopter grandma. I have never been so glad in my entire life that we currently live 2,000 miles apart. My dad took her cell phone away from her and put my younger sisters on "keep mom from calling Jess" duty after I hit my due date (DS2 was 6 days "late") and she implied that I had killed my baby by not going to the hospital. I can laugh at it now... at least a little... because she didn't say it to be mean but she is well, pretty clueless about HB in general. She was kind of mad that I didn't call her when I went into labor but honestly I didn't want to have to deal with her bugging my DH (and honestly, me, because she would insist on talking to me to make sure I was okay) with phone calls every 30 minutes.

[LittleIzumi]

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Ah, the homebirth freakout drill. I know that one. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

[Soror]

I didn't even tell the in-laws until afterward w/ my first hb (#2). After she told me a natural(non-epidural) birth was dangerous for the baby, tried to save the baby from us not circumsizing and other such things I didn't trust her not to freak out. They were not happy afterward. Now they just assume we're crazy :) I do have OB back-up though, as I need rhogram and the mw cannot get it here and dh feels better as (we have about 2 good OBs in town and half-dozen really bad ones). There are vast many subjects in the realm of birth and child rearing I don't discuss with the in-laws, we just pretend they don't exist and chit chat on the few we do agree :)

[Mom-ninja.]

I never call anyone until after baby is in my arms. I don't need people breathing down my neck, even from afar, while I'm birthing! I also totally fudge my due date and tell people I'm due about a month after I really am. :lol:

 

This! I had a horrid experience my first time and ended up with a c-section. My second pg was so stressful because EVERYONE was telling me that I was going to die along with my baby. I was so sorry I told anyone I was planning a home birth. I did refuse to tell my due date. I just gave a general time frame.

 

My mil at one time said, "Of course you'll have an ambulance waiting in the driveway while you're in labor, right?" I couldn't help but laugh out loud at that one. I told her that her husband had a higher risk of having a heart attack at any moment than I had of something going wrong in labor, and asked if she had an ambulance sitting in her driveway waiting for said heart attack.

 

I finally ended up telling people, in a very clear do-not-mess-with-me voice, that my body, my baby, my birth, my choice was not up for discussion period. If someone tried to bring it up I literally left the room.

 

We did not call anyone when I was in labor. In fact, I talked to my mom while I was in early labor, and she didn't have a clue. :tongue_smilie:

 

With my third pg the same started all over. I didn't even want to announce the pg. :glare: My mil asked if I was going to a hospital this time around. I asked her why in the world I would do that after having such a great home birth before?

 

That pg I cut those conversations off a lot sooner. I refused again to reveal my due date, and I told no one about any appointments or pg stuff. Basically, I acted as if I wasn't pg and refused to discuss anything.

 

 

I hope you are able to enjoy your pg. Do you have caller ID? Use it.

[ktgrok]

This! I had a horrid experience my first time and ended up with a c-section. My second pg was so stressful because EVERYONE was telling me that I was going to die along with my baby. I was so sorry I told anyone I was planning a home birth. I did refuse to tell my due date. I just gave a general time frame.

 

My mil at one time said, "Of course you'll have an ambulance waiting in the driveway while you're in labor, right?" I couldn't help but laugh out loud at that one. I told her that her husband had a higher risk of having a heart attack at any moment than I had of something going wrong in labor, and asked if she had an ambulance sitting in her driveway waiting for said heart attack.

 

I finally ended up telling people, in a very clear do-not-mess-with-me voice, that my body, my baby, my birth, my choice was not up for discussion period. If someone tried to bring it up I literally left the room.

 

We did not call anyone when I was in labor. In fact, I talked to my mom while I was in early labor, and she didn't have a clue. :tongue_smilie:

 

With my third pg the same started all over. I didn't even want to announce the pg. :glare: My mil asked if I was going to a hospital this time around. I asked her why in the world I would do that after having such a great home birth before?

 

That pg I cut those conversations off a lot sooner. I refused again to reveal my due date, and I told no one about any appointments or pg stuff. Basically, I acted as if I wasn't pg and refused to discuss anything.

 

 

I hope you are able to enjoy your pg. Do you have caller ID? Use it.

 

that sounds JUST like my last pregnancy. I finally told her flat out "This is upsetting you, upsetting me, and not good for me or the baby, so we won't talk about it any more." My dad said "well, you've got months left of the pregnancy so I'll talk about it until them.":001_huh:

 

Oh, and when I had explained that various things would risk me out of homebirth, including high blood pressure, he said "well then, I'll just hope for high blood pressure." That really hurt, and don't you know I DID end up battling high blood pressure the whole rest of the pregnancy. I didn't tell them though...my midwife helped me keep it under control, I had no other issues (no protein spilling/etc) and it was fine. This pregnancy my blood pressure has been fine, and I'm wondering if part of the problem was the stress of my family last time.

 

They won't pull this stuff in front of my husband, thanfully (he will NOT tolerate it), so my goal is to avoid seeing them without him present. When I visited them early in my pregnancy I just didn't tell them I was pregnant, and now I won't visit without him.

 

In good news the due date issue isn't a problem. She was 3 weeks late with me, so doesn't bat an eye at me going "late". My last one was born at 41 weeks 5 days, and she didn't harrass me about that.

 

Thanks everyone. good to know I'm not alone.

 

Oh, and last night, after posting this, I got sick....vomiting and diarrhea. Can't help but wonder if it was stress again.

[LittleIzumi]

that sounds JUST like my last pregnancy. I finally told her flat out "This is upsetting you, upsetting me, and not good for me or the baby, so we won't talk about it any more." My dad said "well, you've got months left of the pregnancy so I'll talk about it until them.":001_huh:

 

Oh, and when I had explained that various things would risk me out of homebirth, including high blood pressure, he said "well then, I'll just hope for high blood pressure." That really hurt, and don't you know I DID end up battling high blood pressure the whole rest of the pregnancy. I didn't tell them though...my midwife helped me keep it under control, I had no other issues (no protein spilling/etc) and it was fine. This pregnancy my blood pressure has been fine, and I'm wondering if part of the problem was the stress of my family last time.

 

They won't pull this stuff in front of my husband, thanfully (he will NOT tolerate it), so my goal is to avoid seeing them without him present. When I visited them early in my pregnancy I just didn't tell them I was pregnant, and now I won't visit without him.

 

In good news the due date issue isn't a problem. She was 3 weeks late with me, so doesn't bat an eye at me going "late". My last one was born at 41 weeks 5 days, and she didn't harrass me about that.

 

Thanks everyone. good to know I'm not alone.

 

Oh, and last night, after posting this, I got sick....vomiting and diarrhea. Can't help but wonder if it was stress again.

 

 

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

[Excelsior! Academy]

I got the whole "at your age..." talk from my mom. It was my fifth child. I have fairly easy labors, if you call labor easy, and had a midwife with dd #1. My ob, whom I trust, wouldn't agree to be an emergency backup so it was a deal breaker for me. I ended up delivering before the dr. got there so it didn't matter anyway.

 

Do what you want. To ditto a pp it is your body. You know your history. YOU are the one that needs to make your birth decision.

[momacacia]

First home birth, huh?;)

 

Hope it's beautiful!

[ktgrok]

First home birth, huh?;)

 

Hope it's beautiful!

 

Second, actually!!!! You would have thought the wonderful/short/un eventful first one would have convinced her I wasn't crazy!

[Soror]

Second, actually!!!! You would have thought the wonderful/short/un eventful first one would have convinced her I wasn't crazy!

 

That is your first mistake, your trying to convince her your not crazy. Life goes much easier when they just lose hope on you, really :) Don't try to convince someone who you cannot convince. The less youtell the better, your not dealing with rational thought, but emotions and a mother's worry!

[ktgrok]

That is your first mistake, your trying to convince her your not crazy. Life goes much easier when they just lose hope on you, really :) Don't try to convince someone who you cannot convince. The less youtell the better, your not dealing with rational thought, but emotions and a mother's worry!

 

So true. I gave up partly through the pregnancy last time, and planned to avoid the subject this time. Of course, today my dad stopped off (he was in town) to drop off something and said my mom said I sounded short of breath on the phone (um...5 feet tall, NO torso at all, with a big old baby in my belly...) and wanted to know if the midwife brings oxygen to the birth. Yes, dad. She does. I've gone over all this, but whatever.

[GnomeyNewt]

That is your first mistake, your trying to convince her your not crazy. Life goes much easier when they just lose hope on you, really :) Don't try to convince someone who you cannot convince. The less youtell the better, your not dealing with rational thought, but emotions and a mother's worry!

 

This! 100%... In all aspects of your life it is a good policy for people who insist on NOT letting you live your life, with the choices you've made for yourself and family. Far better for them to just call you crazy and give up on you, than what appears to be such a stressful situation!

 

1st HB I do remember a lot of questions, but by the second HB, what could they say since the first worked out? I would probably distance myself from anyone trying to cast bad thoughts at me during preggo time, only happy thoughts please!

 

I have always taken paths that are the opposite of the norm. I swear I don't do this on purpose, but it has run me into some quite interesting conversations. I think after I started homeschooling, the final straw was dropped for many of my family members and I am officially the craziest person in the family! :lol: Welcome to the Looney Tunes Bunch!

[ktgrok]

This! 100%... In all aspects of your life it is a good policy for people who insist on NOT letting you live your life, with the choices you've made for yourself and family. Far better for them to just call you crazy and give up on you, than what appears to be such a stressful situation!

 

1st HB I do remember a lot of questions, but by the second HB, what could they say since the first worked out? I would probably distance myself from anyone trying to cast bad thoughts at me during preggo time, only happy thoughts please!

 

I have always taken paths that are the opposite of the norm. I swear I don't do this on purpose, but it has run me into some quite interesting conversations. I think after I started homeschooling, the final straw was dropped for many of my family members and I am officially the craziest person in the family! :lol: Welcome to the Looney Tunes Bunch!

 

 

We started homeschooling my son after I had my homebirth with my daughter, and I swear the only reason I didn't get more flak about homeschooling was they figured it wasn't as weird or as bad as homebirth!

[Lisbeth]

I have to be honest that I would be very unhappy if my daughter chose to homebirth, especially "freebirth." but my libertarian streak complicates my view. The stats for homebirth are bad when you compare apples to apples, but free choice and all... Further complicating matters is that it is that the baby is not given a choice. When is seeking no medical intervention child endangering? Obviously I am conflicted. I don't blame mothers for freaking out abt homebirths, but it is none of their business. If a child dies via free or homebirth, a comparable to hospital investigation should be conducted. Full disclosure: one of my four children would be dead if I had hb with him, he needed immediate nicu intervention at birth, which was a surprise.

[ktgrok]

I have to be honest that I would be very unhappy if my daughter chose to homebirth, especially "freebirth." but my libertarian streak complicates my view. The stats for homebirth are bad when you compare apples to apples, but free choice and all... Further complicating matters is that it is that the baby is not given a choice. When is seeking no medical intervention child endangering? Obviously I am conflicted. I don't blame mothers for freaking out abt homebirths, but it is none of their business. If a child dies via free or homebirth, a comparable to hospital investigation should be conducted. Full disclosure: one of my four children would be dead if I had hb with him, he needed immediate nicu intervention at birth, which was a surprise.

 

Actually, comparing apples to apples the outcomes are as good or better. And I am sure that just as there are babies that would have died if they had been born at home there are mothers or babies that would have died if they had been born in a hospital. And homebirth doesn't mean no medical intervention....my midwife brings oxygen, neonatal and adult resucitation equipment, medication to stop maternal hemmoragh, etc etc. No, she doesn't bring a nicu, but there isn't one on the same floor as the birthing rooms at the hospital either...transport time does add complications, but breathing can be maintained en route, if needed.

 

Full disclosure, my last child would have been a c-section if born in a hospital, with all the risks that entails for both of us.

[GnomeyNewt]

I have to be honest that I would be very unhappy if my daughter chose to homebirth, especially "freebirth." but my libertarian streak complicates my view. The stats for homebirth are bad when you compare apples to apples, but free choice and all... Further complicating matters is that it is that the baby is not given a choice. When is seeking no medical intervention child endangering? Obviously I am conflicted. I don't blame mothers for freaking out abt homebirths, but it is none of their business. If a child dies via free or homebirth, a comparable to hospital investigation should be conducted. Full disclosure: one of my four children would be dead if I had hb with him, he needed immediate nicu intervention at birth, which was a surprise.

 

I'm pretty sure the OP is looking for support. :confused:

 

Suffice to say, I think you need to do more research on this subject so that you are better antiquated with stats and/or the choices of other mothers making an informed decision for the baby, themselves, and their family's -- regardless of whether they decide to birth at home, birthing center, or hospital. Which I support all three, because I feel a mother should birth where she feels the safest (if medically possible).

[bluechicken]

I have to be honest that I would be very unhappy if my daughter chose to homebirth, especially "freebirth." but my libertarian streak complicates my view. The stats for homebirth are bad when you compare apples to apples, but free choice and all... Further complicating matters is that it is that the baby is not given a choice. When is seeking no medical intervention child endangering? Obviously I am conflicted. I don't blame mothers for freaking out abt homebirths, but it is none of their business. If a child dies via free or homebirth, a comparable to hospital investigation should be conducted. Full disclosure: one of my four children would be dead if I had hb with him, he needed immediate nicu intervention at birth, which was a surprise.

 

Thank you! Huge applause.

 

 

To those that think it's your body, your choice you are forgetting the innocent life you are putting in danger. Two out of three babies that die in a homebirth could have been saved at the hospital. The risk of your baby dying at home is 3 times higher than at the hospital.

 

 

Those are pretty alarming stats. The OP is a VBAC and that in itself should risk her out of delivering at home. Risk factors, smish factors, right?

 

 

I think the families that have expressed concern over these homebirths have every right to be scared silly and I applaude them for speaking out.

[justLisa]

ktgrok - You need to tell your self over and over, and over again after plugging your ears and saying la la la la la la that you have made the best decision for you and yours, and all the crazies can just shut it.

 

Seriously, once I realized I DON"T GIVE A D*MN it just kind of made me laugh and pitty all of the people who are so parranoid.

[justLisa]

Actually, comparing apples to apples the outcomes are as good or better. And I am sure that just as there are babies that would have died if they had been born at home there are mothers or babies that would have died if they had been born in a hospital. And homebirth doesn't mean no medical intervention....my midwife brings oxygen, neonatal and adult resucitation equipment, medication to stop maternal hemmoragh, etc etc. No, she doesn't bring a nicu, but there isn't one on the same floor as the birthing rooms at the hospital either...transport time does add complications, but breathing can be maintained en route, if needed.

 

Full disclosure, my last child would have been a c-section if born in a hospital, with all the risks that entails for both of us.

 

Same here. And I had a c-sec with my first. WE have the same story.

[ktgrok]

Thank you! Huge applause.

 

 

To those that think it's your body, your choice you are forgetting the innocent life you are putting in danger. Two out of three babies that die in a homebirth could have been saved at the hospital. The risk of your baby dying at home is 3 times higher than at the hospital.

 

 

Those are pretty alarming stats. The OP is a VBAC and that in itself should risk her out of delivering at home. Risk factors, smish factors, right?

 

 

I think the families that have expressed concern over these homebirths have every right to be scared silly and I applaude them for speaking out.

 

try looking at those stats again, and check if they are looking at PLANNED homebirth or just babies born at home. Cause I know the study you speak of, and it is bunk. Of course I wouldn't have a homebirth if that was accurate! This is the largest study to date, that is a prospective study, looking at actual planned home births with Certified Professional Midwives. "Conclusions Planned home birth for low risk women in North America using certified professional midwives was associated with lower rates of medical intervention but similar intrapartum and neonatal mortality to that of low risk hospital births in the United States." It is from the British Medical Journal. http://www.bmj.com/content/330/7505/1416.full?ehom

 

FYI, my state regulates who can have a homebirth, and after one vaginal birth my risk factor is so low that I don't even need a consult with a doctor. And even if I wanted one, the OB I use had a homebirth VBAC herself, despite being an OB that practices in a hospital. So I'll take the medical advice, not yours, but thank you for your opinion. I did have an ultrasound though, to see where my placenta was, along with making sure the baby's heart looked perfect, etc. The bad outcomes with VBAC happen when the placenta is effected by a rupture, and mine is no where near my scar. Not even close. I'm not into crazy risks, and very into research, risk evaluation, and preparation.

Edited June 20, 2012 by ktgrok

[bluechicken]

try looking at those stats again, and check if they are looking at PLANNED homebirth or just babies born at home. Cause I know the study you speak of, and it is bunk. Of course I wouldn't have a homebirth if that was accurate! This is the largest study to date, that is a prospective study, looking at actual planned home births with Certified Professional Midwives. "Conclusions Planned home birth for low risk women in North America using certified professional midwives was associated with lower rates of medical intervention but similar intrapartum and neonatal mortality to that of low risk hospital births in the United States." It is from the British Medical Journal. http://www.bmj.com/content/330/7505/1416.full?ehom

 

FYI, my state regulates who can have a homebirth, and after one vaginal birth my risk factor is so low that I don't even need a consult with a doctor. And even if I wanted one, the OB I use had a homebirth VBAC herself, despite being an OB that practices in a hospital. So I'll take the medical advice, not yours, but thank you for your opinion. I did have an ultrasound though, to see where my placenta was, along with making sure the baby's heart looked perfect, etc. The bad outcomes with VBAC happen when the placenta is effected by a rupture, and mine is no where near my scar. Not even close. I'm not into crazy risks, and very into research, risk evaluation, and preparation.

 

 

 

The study you linked compares planned homebirths in the year 2000 to hospital births from the 1970s and 1980s. So, yes the rates were similar. However, if you compare the perinatal mortality rate of ALL hospital births in the same year (2000; the authors left that out, hmmmmm) you will find that the rate of perinatal mortality at HOME is almost 3 times higher than the hospital births for that year.

 

 

Just because you read an abstract from a research paper doesn't mean the actual data within the paper is true. You did link the only paper in existence that attempts to show that homebirth is safe. In reality, even that paper shows how incredibly unsafe it is.

 

 

I won't change your mind but I will debunk your "science" for FACT.

 

 

ACOG standards for a VBAC states that you should have continuous fetal monitoring in a tertiary care facility with access to an immediate OR. I don't see where any of that can take place in your home.

 

 

You take whatever medical advice you want but one anecdotal story of a successful VBAC at home would never convince me to risk my babies life at home.

[Soror]

ahem. ktgrok, good chance to practice disengaging. What random strangers think matters none.

[ktgrok]

ahem. ktgrok, good chance to practice disengaging. What random strangers think matters none.

 

good point. Bubble of peace, bubble of peace....

[ktgrok]

 

 

ACOG standards for a VBAC states that you should have continuous fetal monitoring in a tertiary care facility with access to an immediate OR. I don't see where any of that can take place in your home.

 

 

You take whatever medical advice you want but one anecdotal story of a successful VBAC at home would never convince me to risk my babies life at home.

ACOG's stance on monitoring and place of birth for VBAC are, by their own admission, in their own document, NOT based on research or fact. They are basedon opinion only. And who on earth said they were basing a decision on one anecdote?? Even if I was basing it on anecdote, which i'm not (i spend about 3 months researching EVERY bad VBAC outcome I could find), I personally know so many....and my midwife has the best VBAC stats in the area, if not the State. I even know a woman who ruptured, at home of all things...and she and baby are perfectly fine. Could something go wrong, yes. Lets say that the 3 times higher infant mortality was accurate (which many many experts have said it isn't), we could balance that by the fact that a C section increases the mother's mortality rate by at least 3 times. Somehow though, I doubt you'd be so concerned about me risking my life if I had posted that I was having a repeat c-section based on doctor's advice. And yet, I have two children already that need me, and put my life higher than my unborn child's for that reason.

 

But either way, the reason for this post wasn't to debate homebirth. It was to vent about my parents trying to control/guilt/browbeat/etc their adult daughter about her medical decisions. Agree with them or not, they are NOT their decisions. And if they want to worry they can focus their worry on my sister, who is due the same week, having a repeat c-section, with all the risks that entails. Both choices have risks, birth has risks...they are just different risks. And it is our right to choose which ones we are more comfortable with.

Edited June 20, 2012 by ktgrok
`1

[Soror]

good point. Bubble of peace, bubble of peace....

Practice your labor relaxation techniques :)

[Parrothead]

good point. Bubble of peace, bubble of peace....

Doing perimeter check of your Bubble of Peace.

[ktgrok]

 

Just because you read an abstract from a research paper doesn't mean the actual data within the paper is true. You did link the only paper in existence that attempts to show that homebirth is safe. In reality, even that paper shows how incredibly unsafe it is.

 

 

.

 

Not to change your mind, as I'm sure I won't, and wouldn't try, but for those reading this and thinking that is true, the footnotes link many other studies, although smaller, that show the same outcome for low risk women in home or hospital birth. This one is larger, more recent, but not in the US. However, in my state the midwifery laws are modeled on those of Europe, and there is good communication between midwife and doctor, good transfer protocols (midwife even accompanies mom into the OR and scrubs in for c-sections), etc, which is what the study states is important. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19624439

 

The truth is there are not a lot of prospective studies, but those that have been done have shown good outcomes. A few even show BETTER outcomes for women who have already had a vaginal birth.

 

Not sure where you got the statistic that perinatal mortality was 1/3 lower than 1.7 per 1000 births in 2000, for all hospital births...couldn't find that stat anywhere.... I know that the perinatal mortality rate for the whole country, all births, was closer to 7 per 1000, but that is going by a different definition.

[Soror]

Doing perimeter check of your Bubble of Peace.

 

I think it's failing- go back to the bubble :)

[ktgrok]

I think it's failing- go back to the bubble :)

 

Actually, I feel great, the 2009 study in the Netherlands was really interesting to read, lol. (I'm such a geek!) Plus, I posted a link to what a Licensed Midwife is, and what their training is, etc on my facebook page and my mom "liked" it, so maybe that will help her feel better. I've told her all the things the article says, but in black and white, from someone other than me, it makes more of an impact. (I'm known to have my husband post things on HIS facebook, so that my mom will believe them, because she trusts him more than me.)

 

Not worried about a stranger's opinion, but wanted to balance it for other's reading. Everyone should do their own research, and so very much depends on the training of the midwife, the situation where you live etc. I imagine outcomes are very different in areas where there is a hostile environment towards midwives, where transfer is more complicated or delayed, etc. I'm 20 minutes form surgery, even sitting in my house, and my midwife is very well respected by the local hospital and doctors, so transfers are handled well and quickly. If the doctor's didn't have that relationship with her I'd be concerned. i like that if she calls and tells them there is an emergency coming they believe her and start scrubbing in! (as opposed to my "emergency" c-section, where we had to find the doctor before I could be moved to OR all the way across the hospital...he was having dinner ...and wine It seems he didn't trust the opinion of the CNM in the hospital and didn't take things very seriously. sigh.)

[Soror]

Plus, I posted a link to what a Licensed Midwife is, and what their training is, etc on my facebook page and my mom "liked" it, so maybe that will help her feel better. I've told her all the things the article says, but in black and white, from someone other than me, it makes more of an impact. (I'm known to have my husband post things on HIS facebook, so that my mom will believe them, because she trusts him more than me.)

 

That's awesome, hopefully she actually read it and will let up a bit on you. Personally, I don't like debates but if it is good for you, right on :) I just stay in my bubble and make my own research and decisions. I let myself get stressed out too easy though and I'm weary of fighting for all the different ways we do things.

[ktgrok]

That's awesome, hopefully she actually read it and will let up a bit on you. Personally, I don't like debates but if it is good for you, right on :) I just stay in my bubble and make my own research and decisions. I let myself get stressed out too easy though and I'm weary of fighting for all the different ways we do things.

 

If it were in person it would stress me. And either way, I know my limit. When my pulse goes up I quit :)

 

I do think it is time to get some hypnobabies affirmations going though, and work on that bubble :)

[bluechicken]

If it were in person it would stress me. And either way, I know my limit. When my pulse goes up I quit :)

 

I do think it is time to get some hypnobabies affirmations going though, and work on that bubble :)

 

Go find your bubble but that won't change the facts.

 

 

My "opinion" is based on science and statistics.

 

 

Anyway, good luck with everything. I wish you the best.

[Princess Peach]

Go find your bubble but that won't change the facts.

 

 

My "opinion" is based on science and statistics.

 

 

Anyway, good luck with everything. I wish you the best.

 

 

Wow. You know what? The OP posted yesterday that the stress from this has made her physically sick. You obviously disagree with the OP about the safety of homebirth and you are entitled to your opinion. But heaping stress onto the situation is a little much. Time to back off.

[Soror]

fyi: Going to "the bubble" isn't about ignoring the "facts." It is about ignoring people who already have their mind made up and are trying to push an agenda. The op, like most every other hb'er I know has already done research. Hugs to the OP :)

[Veritaserum]

fyi: Going to "the bubble" isn't about ignoring the "facts." It is about ignoring people who already have their mind made up and are trying to push an agenda. The op, like most every other hb'er I know has already done research. Hugs to the OP :)

 

:iagree:

 

These discussions make me crazy because of the implication that home birth/VBAC/"unconventional" mothers don't care about the safety of their babies. :rolleyes:

 

My parents know better than to disparage my parenting choices, but I had a jerk of an ER doc in my recent pregnancy. I was bleeding and passing clots at 17 weeks, so my (hospital-based) CNM sent me to the ER for an ultrasound. When the doctor asked who my provider was he grimaced when I gave the name of my midwife. Then he asked if I'd been getting prenatal care. Uh...yeah, I just said I was seeing a midwife! He asked if my midwife was backed up by real doctors. Dude knows nothing about OB/midwife relationships. When he asked why I was planning to give birth at a different hospital (further away) than the one we were at, I said it was because I had looked at all my options and picked the best one. Dh could tell that I was pretty ticked off. :tongue_smilie:

[Whereneverever]

 

Not worried about a stranger's opinion, but wanted to balance it for other's reading. Everyone should do their own research, and so very much depends on the training of the midwife, the situation where you live etc. I imagine outcomes are very different in areas where there is a hostile environment towards midwives, where transfer is more complicated or delayed, etc. I'm 20 minutes form surgery, even sitting in my house, and my midwife is very well respected by the local hospital and doctors, so transfers are handled well and quickly. If the doctor's didn't have that relationship with her I'd be concerned. i like that if she calls and tells them there is an emergency coming they believe her and start scrubbing in! (as opposed to my "emergency" c-section, where we had to find the doctor before I could be moved to OR all the way across the hospital...he was having dinner ...and wine It seems he didn't trust the opinion of the CNM in the hospital and didn't take things very seriously. sigh.)

 

Have you called the hospital and confirmed that? I have known multiple midwives with statements like that... And it's not always true. And I'm not a naysayer- I've had two Homebirths.