How do you fit it all in and keep sane!

[ButterfliesandBooks]

I'm going crazy at the moment trying to come up with a schedule that works for us. How do you fit in home schooling, housework, cooking meals, finding time for you/partner, plus commitments outside the home? I really can't function right in a untidy/unclean home. Although I'm trying to be more relaxed about it I do find it hard to get on with home schooling when there's dirty dishes, messy floors and a pile of laundry.

 

Also, we are out of the home 2 to 5 times a week with different activities. Most of the schedules I read seem to have a certain day when everyone goes out to classes/library/errands etc. But that can't work for us when ds has a sports class on Tuesday and dd has a sewing class on Weds and they both have swimming on a Friday, etc.

 

Plus share your tips! And let me know it's ok not to have a perfect, dust free home ;)

Many thanks,

Bee

x

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

You have to give up on the sane idea! :lol::lol:

:willy_nilly::001_unsure::eek::ohmy: is how I feel most days when I try to do it all!

[....]

I really try to limit how much we have to leave home for stuff. We do enrichment classes and stuff, too - so, it's hard.

 

Get a teacher's planner and schedule the week on Sunday night. Know exactly what material you want to cover for the week.

 

Sometimes, we all sit down for school and are very organized...sometimes, I vaccuum, grab one of the kids running around and say, "Hey! Do your Growing with Grammar and 2 pages of cursive!" :tongue_smilie: Sometimes, I'll print out a syllabus for the older kids and have them work thru the syllabus on their own and I check their work (it's good practice for them, too).

 

Organization...and lots of time planning...:D

[Impish]

Bwah hahahahaha!

 

We're supposed to be/have been/stay sane?! Nobody told me that.

 

Honestly, I'd lighten up on stuff outside the home. 2x a wk is fine, 5x is overload.

 

As for housework...Wolf left me a note this am asking me to tidy and steam clean the carpets, so what's that tell you? :blushing:

[SweetMissMagnolia]

:lol:yeah LOL I lost my grip on sanity a while ago LOL seriously you just do the best you can--my house isn't the cleanest on the block but it's not one of the worst either....hang in there...you'll find something that works for you.....it's hard (especially when u first start out)

[kwickimom]

I am focusing on planning weekly (I am doing HOD so not a lot of planning, just gathering materials etc) but I am going to have to split up some days when we have appts or activites to do. I think having a specific weekly plan according to your schedule done on Sunday night works well so you can work around any last minute things. We dont do a lot outside of the home during the day and just have a few things at night so on those nights I crockpot cook or throw in a pizza.

 

For the cleaning- I am going to work hard on getting as much done as night as possible and whatever isnt done....doesnt get touched until school is done the next day. After dinner we are going to do our chores, lay out clothes, set table for breakfast and I think we are even going to prep lunches (make sandwiches, cut up fruits/veggie). I have to change my mindset as I am used to doing things in the morning, but I get sidetracked and school gets started late. So- dishwasher is gonna get run right after dinner and put away before bed and laundry will get thrown in before dinner, dried after dinner, and put away before bed.

 

I am working on checklists and getting the kids independant on chores and grooming this summer so that things are routine. I think delegating as much as possible helps too.

[twoforjoy]

I do very little out of the house, beyond visiting friends in the neighborhood or walking to the local branch library, during the week. My DH takes the car to work, so that cuts down on how much we can do, and I'm not really inclined to do much more during the week, anyway.

 

I can't function with too much clutter, either. But, a lot of times I have to suck it up and do it, because I really can't keep things as neat as I'd like all day. The kids are going to make messes with their toys in the living area, and it drives me crazy, but I just have to deal with it. I try to have 2 or 3 set times during the day, usually before meals, where we pick everything up. It usually only takes 5-10 minutes. Then, things get as messy as the kids make it until the next clean up time.

[*Lulu*]

You sit down and make a prioritized list. On mine education of offspring is higher than scrubbing baseboards. (Guess which one happens with more regularity! :tongue_smilie: )

 

Seriously, you do what you can do and let go of the rest. DH and I are in the process of re-negotiating household duties right now because I realized, (after two years of treading water), that I cannot keep up with all the housework plus all the schooling.

 

I also use our school schedule to my advantage. (6 weeks of school, 2 weeks break) During the break I do heavy cleaning and/or major projects. I also prep the next 6 weeks of school so that everything is streamlined during our school session.

[The Girls' Mom]

I have 3 kids, and they all have very different interests. We also belong to a very active homeschool group that gets together a lot. The kids are all great, and all the moms get along well, so we try to foster the relationships as much as possible. I also have the house that has spur of the moment hang out time and sleep overs. I also have a dh that works from home, and goes to school.

 

All that to say, we are BUSY!

 

What helps me the most is having a very flexible schedule because we school year round. I tend to pick curriculum that can be set aside for a day or so, then picked back up. I don't school with the 'finished by x date' mentality.

 

Whenever possible, I try to schedule activities on the same day...but it doesn't often happen. Right now we have Tae Kwan Do and Piano on the same day. But then we have church on Wednesday, Park/field trip day with the group on Friday. Then in the fall we'll have outside classes on Mondays and I'll teach an art class for a group in my home on Wednesdays.

 

I try to do things like shopping on the days that I'm already out...usually on Fridays.

 

I also try to clean as I go. I'll get up in the morning, grab a cup of coffee and empty the dishwasher. Then as I have time, or happen to wander through the kitchen, I'll load it back up. I'll also start a load of laundry early in the morning...it can wash itself while I do other things. Then I'll get the kids started on their school work, and as they are working I'll pcik up in whatever room we are in. I'll also work on dinner through out the day in tiny increments. Like yesterday, I set out chicken breasts to thaw as I waited for my coffee. Then a couple of hours later, once the kids were busy with school stuff, I sliced it and put it in a marinade. Then at lunch time I put rice in the oven to bake. When dinner time rolled around, all I had to do was chop up a few veggies and stirfry the lot in a skillet with the chicken.

 

I also delegate chores to the kids. They do laundry, dishes, and trash. Our family dirties enough clothes and dishes to do two loads of each a day....they get the second round in the evenings after dinner. They have done those chores since they were big enough to stand on a stool and reach the sink well. The trash waited until they were bigger than the trash can:tongue_smilie:

 

My house is often dusty. It's NEVER perfectly clean. But laundry stays pretty caught up, and I rarely have dirty dishes sitting on the counter over night (but it DOES happen). My office is ALWAYS a wreck. I just gave up stressing about it. I can have a clean house when they are grown. :lol:

[SailorMom]

Yeah, sanity..... I remember that :)

 

 

We're crazy around here. Scouts, sports, my graduate degree, and DH's deployment schedule has been horrible (he'll have been gone about 9 months this year)...

 

Keep in mind: This is only my opinion and how I run my house. I am not saying this is right for everyone.

 

Here's the deal. You have to decide what your priorities are. I decided that - because I decided to homeschool (and regular school is a full time teaching job), that homeschooling had to be my 'full time" job in order for me to make sure my kids got everything they needed from school.

Because of that - I do not always have a perfect house :) I have to do my own graduate course work (no options there), and we want the boys in Scouts and sports (also, I am Committee Chair and DH is an Asst. Scoutmaster).

Therefore, the house is basically last. Now - still - my house is not 'gross". Nor do I look like a hoarder. However, both of my boys are teens and can pitch in.

I see you have a 2 year old. Even without homeschooling, when my sons were that young my house was just always in chaos.

Anyway- have your older kids pitch in where they can: can they watch the 2 yo in another room while you clean? Can they clean thier own bathroom? Etc.

Other than that- on a daily basis, only do chores such as dishes and laundry, and cooking. Everything else just has to wait until the weekend when you aren't doing school with the kids.

I actualy try to have a BBQ or some kind of get together at my house about once every two weeks. Usually on a Saturday evening. This means that after 1pm on Friday, until guests get here on Sat, I'm busting my butt to make the house look perfect :)

If I do that every two weeks - it never takes longer than that. Add to that deep cleaning before Thanksgiving and out of town guests (we have them about 3 times a year), and things stay somewhat ok.

I'm having a homeschool end-of-the-year party tomorrow. They are gettiing here at noon. :)

[justamouse]

Wine. Half glass before 12 and fill r up after. ;):D

 

 

It's something you grow into. Some people schedule down to minutes, others just wing it. You kinda figure out what you need as you journey along. It all depends on what your priorities are and how your family functions.

[Mom0012]

What works for me is getting up early before the kids. During that time, I will often exercise, do the dishes/start the dishwasher and start a load of laundry. If needed, I will try to get another load in sometime later in the day. This works for me because I naturally wake up very early.

 

Then, I will wake up the kids around 7:30 and let them start their day by reading. Ideally, I take a shower while they are doing that and then I spend some time with each of them going over their lessons. Then they work for a while and I start breakfast.

 

I have my kids unload the dishwasher and put away their clothes.

 

I keep meals very simple. We have lots of crockpot meals and I grill often when the weather permits.

 

My house is not perfect. I don't care if it is and fortunately my husband doesn't either. I keep things picked up with the help of the kids, keep up with the dishes, meals, laundry and shopping and then I just vacuum once a week and get to the bathrooms every other week (and sometimes I enlist my husband to help with that). I do not dust often enough or get to the bathrooms as frequently as I feel I should, but that's more due to the fact that I hate doing those things rather than not having time.

 

We are out for lots of activities -- ballet and swimming 2X/week, choir, boy scouts, girl scouts, piano, and playdates, but all of these things take place in the afternoon. I make all appointments with doctors for the late afternoon even if it means I'll hit traffic. I say NO to all coops even though I am tempted every year.

 

Lisa

Edited June 10, 2011 by LisaTheresa

[CalicoKat]

I'm going crazy at the moment trying to come up with a schedule that works for us. How do you fit in home schooling, housework, cooking meals, finding time for you/partner, plus commitments outside the home? I really can't function right in a untidy/unclean home. Although I'm trying to be more relaxed about it I do find it hard to get on with home schooling when there's dirty dishes, messy floors and a pile of laundry.

 

Also, we are out of the home 2 to 5 times a week with different activities. Most of the schedules I read seem to have a certain day when everyone goes out to classes/library/errands etc. But that can't work for us when ds has a sports class on Tuesday and dd has a sewing class on Weds and they both have swimming on a Friday, etc.

 

Plus share your tips! And let me know it's ok not to have a perfect, dust free home ;)

Many thanks,

Bee

x

I have only one out-the-house day scheduled per week. If the desired activities don't fall on that day, we don't do them.

 

If the activity is in the evening we'll consider it, but only for the older kids. And only if dh and I can tag team it.

 

We need 4 days of uninterrupted schooling in this chapter of our kid's lives to get it done.

[angela in ohio]

We're in and out almost every day, between co-ops, art lessons, music lessons, symphoony practice, volunteer work, sports, Scouts, etc. We still manage to get an enormous amount of school work done (you can see what we do in my signature, and we are on schedule, despite complications including my dad having a heart attack and triple bypass surgery this year.) It is possible.

 

My 13 yo and 15 yo each do about a third of the work of keeping this house running. Split among three women, it's not that much for each of us. We also keep things simple: no fancy clothes to take care of (other than ironing dh's shirts and drycleaning his suits,) no expensive or expansive hobbies for me, no elaborate decorating in the house, etc.

 

Honestly, it is always like trying to keep a bunch of plates spinning, but it is for such a short time in the scheme of things. As my dd gets older, it is easier to deal with, because I see (and dread) the end. I only let it be crazy abot 5% of the time. Any more than that, and I make changes, because our mental health is important. But we tried the "stay home with ourselves all the time," thing, and it didn't fit us. We prefer to be out in the community, doing lessons and classes, etc. We are together most of the time (the girls help dh caoch ds's ball team, we all go to dd's concerts, etc.,) but we are out and about a lot.

 

There are many options out there for help in organizing (it's a good time of year to start a thread on that,) but A Mother's Rule of Life (Catholic, though I am not, and I still learned a lot,) Side-Tracked Home Executives, and the concepts from Managers of their Home (never read it, just got the concepts from her talk) have helped me a lot. We don't have a big fancy chore chart, we just have a plan to do things when they are needed. When dishes are dirtied, they are washed. Once a day, someone sweeps the floor. Laundry is sorted into hampers, and when one is full, it is dumped in the washer. Once or twice a week, we take a few hours and do bigger cleaning projects. That is the only way I have found to keep up, because complicated charts and diagrams break down with the least bit of complication (and life is generally full of those. :D)

[A.Balaban]

I am not yet in the "crazy" part like the other ladies here, but this is some of the things that I will be doing as the kids get older:

 

1.) Delegate some chores to DH, and some chores to DS/DD as they get older.

 

Depending on the "natural" state of your house (very cluttered, not cluttered, etc) will depend on the amount of time you need to clean. Currently, we live in an apartment that is too small for our family of four, so things are VERY cluttered and it is a constant WIP. (Work-In-Progress).

 

Yes, I get DH to help me with the inside chores. For us, I made a detailed list, and I don't think we ever look at it. But I use it as a sort of guide.

 

2.) One thing I hear all the time is that "you can't have it all". Homeschooling takes up a ton of time and energy, and you can't keep steaming on a full-load without loosing something along the way.

 

I keep a very simple schedule, I write down M-F on a piece of paper and then start my "day" after breakfast. I write down the necessary activities (lunch, nap, dinner, bath, kids bedtime) and then fill it my schedule around there. I only do "blocks" of time twice a day so that way it is very easy to follow. Also, it is super easy to schedule things because if it doesn't fit in an open spot then it doesn't happen. That is how we know if we are trying to do too much. :)

 

Good luck, I imagine this is a goal that you need to keep working towards!

[Ellie]

For myself, I had to limit outside acitivities that took place during the day with other people. Outside, daytime classes would have been the first thing to go, if I had attempted them at all.

[Frontier Mom]

Sanity is overrated anyway.

:iagree: But, if that were me getting the note, I would have called the carpet cleaning company for a visit. Steam clean the carpets :lol:

 

My dh is very understanding and does his part to help around the house. However, I used to be SO much more concerned about the house than I am now. As my dcs have began entering the teenage years, relationships are just the most important thing for me now. I realize the years they will be under the roof home educating are going by so fast that I quit worrying about stuff like clean carpets, etc. We are out of the house almost daily but that means our house stays in flux and that is OK with me. The things they are involved in have been well chosen and we feel they are worth the inconvenience. Yes, we eat out too much and the house is no showcase. Guess what? Our house is the place all the teens want to hang out!! That is great with me because I know where they are.

 

Our front lawn has two bald spots, one for the pitcher mound and one for home base. We have gone through multiple basketball goals and the neighbors even comment about how much my dcs are outside. Personally, I would love to have a clean house, cooked meals and flawlessly planned days. However, my "normal" is fine with me. You just can't do it all. I think you have to find your own "normal" and be content at that spot. It will change year to year but trying to achieve another person's "normal" will only make you bitter and burned out in the end.

 

Just my $.02.;)

[Peela]

Limit activities to afternoons if possible- keep at least 3-4 mornings a week at home to get school done.

 

Start the day with a cleaning routine- dishes, chores, one extra job, a load of washing. Don't try to do housework while homeschooling- schedule housework before or after schoolwork. Treat the homeschooling part of the day as your job. I used the Flylady system to generally keep my housework happening but not overwhelming and i used it to help the kids keep themselves organised and helping.

 

Get a steady rhythm and routine going. I am a morning person- I would get up before everyone else for some quiet time- but we would start school by 8.30am- after breakfast and chores. Regular, daily routine.

 

I would finish by a certain time each day so that I could get other things done. There is actually a limit to how much schoolwork can get done reasonably each day and year. Be at peace with it and just prioritise.

 

Afternoon rest time was important to me.

[Joanne]

I expect my kids to do the maximum of what they can academically and housework/chores wise for their age and ability.

 

I expect my DH to assist with living needs at home.

 

If I can afford it, I hire help.

[herbalgirl]

For myself, I had to limit outside acitivities that took place during the day with other people. Outside, daytime classes would have been the first thing to go, if I had attempted them at all.

 

:iagree: This week has been crazy for us, with running around to all sorts of places. These were appointments like chiropractor, orthodontist, etc, not extracurricular activities for the kids.

 

I find that I quickly become unglued when I have to be going somewhere outside the house practically every day. If you think about it, older generations didn't do this as much. I don't know why we all feel we have to!

 

I would cut out some of those things, definitely, and go easy on yourself with the other things, like keeping house. Get the basics done, you know, clean clothes for everyone, meals in a Crock Pot so you don't need to fuss over preparation, dishes clean and put away or go through a period of time where you use paper plates, kids clean up toys at the end of the day, etc.

[MelAR05]

I think my husband would find a note like that wedged between two pieces of bread for dinner. :lol:

 

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

[Desert Rat]

Well, I think sanity is highly overrated. :)

No, I have a strict schedule and I stick to it. I work outside the home 4 afternoons a week. We have to stay on task or it doesn't get done.

We don't do outside homeschool activities. Partly this is because we haven't found a group we like. Mostly is because we don't have the time. We do soccer and taekwondo in the evenings/weekends. Dh is mostly around to help then and we go to these activities as a family. We do field trips together on the weekends.

I do laundry during school in the morning. I multitask whenever I can. Like going through coupons/circulars/mail while ds is working out math problems. I don't exactly like the way school is going right now. I miss our lazy days of taking our time and doing what we want. But, I can't dwell on the way things used to be. This is our new reality. I have to work and it's okay.

I'm grateful that we've always done a 42 week school year. We didn't have to transition to this after dh lost his job (he's back to work now) and when I went to work. But, this way we finish up most of the main curriculum in 34-36 weeks and I have an extra 6-8 with just history, math, and reading. That way, anything I've had to put off or didn't get time to (read: science!) we can concentrate on heavily those last few weeks.

I can't help you on the dust free house! I go crazy if my house isn't clean so it's still a priority.

I don't work on Fridays, which is our light school days-just math and reading, spelling and latin tests. Friday is my catch-up day. I clean house, grocery shop, run errands, etc.

[Paintedlady]

It's very difficult to do everything well. I try to get things done ine little snippets of time. The kids are reading to themselves? I do dishes or give the bathroom a quick wipe down. Laundry gets done throughout the day as I have a minute here and there to throw in a new load. It gets folded during lunch break. It's rare that I have big chunks of time to devote to keeping up with the house, but when I do I take advantage of it.

 

The other really big help is the kids themselves. My kids are old enough to help out around the house quite a bit and they have a list of chores that they're responsible for. They're also at an age when my teaching them responsibility takes up a large portion of my day and when they are disobedient or give me a bad attitude, they get an extra chore (cleaning).

 

As far as outside responsibilites goes, I'm learning I have to be very choosey about how I spend my time. I'm trying to take to heart what SWB said at convention last year--basically that as homeschoolers, it's ok to say no to everything else. We've chosen this as our way of life and it needs to be guarded. Good luck!

[Jayne J]

There is alot of good advice here, but I'll add my 2 cents. Each family is different. Do what works for *your* family, and that includes you.

 

This is what works for us:

1. I learned to say no. No to extra activities, no to babysitting, no to church or social obligations. This time in my life is about schooling my kids. That is my "job" and crowding in outside commitments made life to hard.

2. Prioritize whatever is left--School is first at our house, housework is after, and people always come before things.

3. I taught the kids to do chores as soon as they were able and we all have chores daily and weekly. That keeps the house from becoming overwhelming.

[ButterfliesandBooks]

Wow...thank you for all your replies. I've just read through them but I'm going to go back and take notes. It's nice to know I'm not alone with finding it hard to fit everything in. I'm not very good at saying no to people and have in the past taken on more than I could do. So I will watch myself with this...

 

Good to know I don't need my sanity either! :tongue_smilie: lol...

 

Thanks so much - you've all given me some great ideas and things to think on.

blessings,

Bee