Who here did NOT go to college? and why?

[5kidsforME]

I am just curious.

 

I'll start, ME!

 

For me it was because I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, and I needed to save money until I did figure it out. Then I met dh and got married and was still thinking about going to nursing school (took a couple of years to figure out that that is what I wanted to do) but got pregnant with my first ds and then it jsut fell by the wayside.

[elegantlion]

I didn't go because...

 

my parents couldn't afford to pay for any of it, I could only get small scholarships and I didn't want to work full time and go to school. They made too much money to get any grants. The only school that offered a decent program in what I wanted to study was expensive.

 

Gave up, went to work full time. I don't regret it as not a day goes by I don't learn something new.

[j.griff]

I never had any desire to attend college. None. I've always preferred to learn what I want, when I want, and on my own.

Many will probably think I wasn't "able" to go when I post what I DID do, but that's just not the case. I "could have", but chose not to. It wasn't important to me at all, I just wanted to get on with my life after being stuck "in the system" for so many years. And I sure as heck didn't want to spend that much money just to have someone else tell me what to learn, and whether my opinion is correct or not.

 

I am so glad I didn't go! I would not be where I am now, and I LOVE my life!

 

What I DID do:

I was pg when we graduated H.S. I continued working at my job (worked during my Jr. and Sr. years- that's where I met my DH), DH joined the Navy to be able to provide for his new family- it's what he *knew*- his brother is in the Navy, his grandpa was in the Navy, as were other relatives. He did the delayed entry program, so that he would be with me when DD was born. He went to boot camp when she was 6 weeks old, then A-school in TN (we got our first apartment in Millington on Navy Road). We were there a few months, then they sent us to San Diego. I could have chosen to get grants, loans, etc., farmed my young child out to strangers, and gone to college to get "an education". It was not appealing. I had no reason to go- no goal that requires a degree. I was very glad to get out in the real world right away, instead of prolonging my time "in the system".

My experience has been wonderful, educational, and I wouldn't change a thing about it.

[Kelli in TN]

I was self supporting at 17. I went to high school in the morning, left campus and went to work in a pizza joint for the afternoon. Then I left there and stopped at gas station to change from my pizza joint uniform into my KFC uniform and went to work there. Everyday. On weekends I worked even more.

My mom lived almost an hour away and was establishing her career and rebuilding her life. My stepdad....well I sure wasn't going to ask for or receive help from him. My high school guidance counselor picked my junior and senior years to have a huge personal crisis that rocked her world, her children's world and created lots of gossip fodder. She was a little busy to help me apply to college. Add to that the fact that in high school I had always been an outsider and in my school the teachers were as cliquish as the kids.

 

I simply had no resources and no clue how to find resources. So I worked and made bad choices in my personal life. I was lonely, confused, overwhelmed, exhausted...I just saw no way to make it happen and so I gave up. I do regret it. There are no words to describe how much I regret it.

[Crissy]

I did not go to college.

 

I come from a long line of tradesmen and homemakers, so it was not unusual that I planned to work right out of high school.

 

I know it can be hard for some to hear that a person is glad to have skipped the college scene, but all of the work experience I had from my high school years forward prepared me for the work I am doing now. Our business is thriving and I LOVE it.

 

My path was just right for me.

How's that for diplomatic? :D

[5kidsforME]

 

My path was just right for me.

How's that for diplomatic? :D

 

 

I think it is. ;)

[Needleroozer]

My situation was similar to Kelli's. My parents divorced when I was 13, and my father never paid child support. My relationship with my mother was very poor, and she started charging me rent when I was 14. I worked several jobs through high school, and neither of my parents cared whether I even graduated, which I wouldn't have done without support of my best friend, her parents, and my high school boyfriend. I moved out shortly after high school, when I discovered that sharing half the rent of an apartment with a girlfriend was cheaper than the rent I was paying my mother without the hassles. Sometimes when I look back on my mom and my relationship all those years ago, it amazes me that my mom and I have the relationship we do now.

 

I very much regret not being able to go to college, but it was never important to my parents, and I really had the story that I was stupid. I have learned a great deal from "the school of hard knocks", and I am grateful for all my work experience, but I do wish college had been more of a possibility for me, and more important to my family. I think I would have worked harder to make it happen.

I still want to go someday- though I think my focus now is different than it would have been.

[Kelli in TN]

and I really had the story that I was stupid. I.

 

You know, I thought I was stupid too. My parents did not make me feel that way but my school experience from about 4th grade up did.

 

I had a lot of cliquish teachers and the pecking order in school was set pretty early. I was towards the bottom.

 

It really has a lot to do with why I homeschool all the way through high school. I know there are fantastic teachers out there, I know there are things that are good in school. But when I think about my children being on the bottom rung of someone else's artificial ladder....no way.

 

Anyway, I just was not convinced that I could go to college. I did not think I could afford it and I did think I was smart enough.

[Colleen]

I know it can be hard for some to hear that a person is glad to have skipped the college scene, but all of the work experience I had from my high school years forward prepared me for the work I am doing now.

 

Why would it be hard for some to hear that? Since I don't consider college the be-all, end-all, I'm always happy to hear from people who are emotionally and financially secure despite having pursued other paths.:)

[Crissy]

 

Why would it be hard for some to hear that? Since I don't consider college the be-all, end-all, I'm always happy to hear from people who are emotionally and financially secure despite having pursued other paths.:)

 

 

Hmmm. I guess that's not the right way to say what I mean.

You're right that it's not hard to hear, but for some it's hard to believe that anyone would be glad to have gone a different route..

 

I've had conversations with folks who think it's nothing to be proud of, skipping college. One of my in-laws reminds me, when the topic of college comes up at family gatherings, that I missed a slew of opportunities and could be doing 'even better' now.

 

Silly, huh?

[Colleen]

Hmmm. I guess that's not the right way to say what I mean. You're right that it's not hard to hear, but for some it's hard to believe that anyone would be glad to have gone a different route.

 

Thanks for the clarification. Yes, I think there are plenty of people who disbelieve statements such as, "I'm glad I didn't go to college" or "I don't regret not having gone to college". Gotcha.

[Quiver0f10]

I moved out of my parent's home when I was a junior and had my own apartment when I was a senior. I got married two months after graduation and 16 months later my I had my first baby.

[Quiver0f10]

I was self supporting at 17. I went to high school in the morning, left campus and went to work in a pizza joint for the afternoon. Then I left there and stopped at gas station to change from my pizza joint uniform into my KFC uniform and went to work there. Everyday. On weekends I worked even more.

 

 

I worked as a waitress in a Chinese restaurant most night and weekends until 2 AM. I had work study so I went in for English first period and then left for my job as a receptionist, which I worked 30 hours a week.

[mo2]

I had applied, been accepted, and then changed my mind at the last minute. Why? Because I didn't know what I wanted to do. I spent the first 22 years of my life wandering with no direction, and then---I got pregnant, and everything became clear. What was I meant to do with my life? Raise children! Don't need college for that!

[nukeswife]

I didn't go to college.

 

Why, I didn't see a reason to go to school and spend the first few years talking all the "required" courses which were basically high school all over again. I was accepted to a couple places but chose not to go. I did get a Certificate from an area tech college but that was mostly a I'm bored thing as I was already working in that area anyway.

 

I'm actually very glad I never went to a big University or anything like that. I enjoyed working and then after meeting my dh (who's a military man) I decided to stay home and be a homemaker. I love that we don't have to coordinate our schedules around my job and his as his takes him away so much as it is. I also love being a mom so I know my path was exactly what I was supposed to do and the right thing for me.

[Jill- OK]

...and I would have loved to have done more, but didn't have the resources/wherewithal to keep it up. (I paid for what I did take, myself).

 

I'm grateful for what I got, and I don't regret the life I have now, so...it's all good.

:001_smile:

[Jill- OK]

I was lonely, confused, overwhelmed, exhausted...I just saw no way to make it happen and so I gave up.

 

I have to admit that sometimes I wonder how different things would have been for me, fresh out of high school, with just a little bit of coaching/encouragement/advice from a family member, school counselor...anyone.

 

Don't get me wrong, I stand by what I said below; I'm grateful for the little post-HS education I got, and I love my life now, but...I would like to have a degree, and I think there are times when it would make a difference for me. (Even though I get jobs, copywriting, without a degree, I have been asked about my education).

 

Even if we don't pay for any of our children's education, I'm confident that simply being there to help them find answers to questions, or offering encouragement, guidance, and help when it comes to finding a path is going to make a huge difference.

 

((Hugs)) to you, sister. Here's to breaking that cycle.)

[Kelli in TN]

 

Even if we don't pay for any of our children's education, I'm confident that simply being there to help them find answers to questions, or offering encouragement, guidance, and help when it comes to finding a path is going to make a huge difference.

 

((Hugs)) to you, sister. Here's to breaking that cycle.)

 

Yes ma'am!! I can't pay for it but I can sure guide them through the maze of college apps! We help with money where we can, but mostly we say "You can do this" and make the scary phone calls, fill out the perplexing paperwork and such.

 

Assuming my oldest graduates from college (and it is a pretty safe assumption that she will) she will be the first female in her direct maternal line to do so. I was the first to graduate high school.

[Scarlett]

Me. I had the opportunities. My mom was very poor and couldn't have helped me financially, but she had just graduated college herself at age 38 and she knew all about how to go to school on the cheap. She wanted me to go. But all I could think of was getting married, which I did 3 months after highschool graduation.

 

I regret getting married at 18. I can think of a dozen things that would have benefited me more than marrying so young and if I dwell on THAT I might go insane, but the end result of THAT decision is my son and well, he makes it all worth while.

 

I wish I had done missionary work. I wish I had stayed with my mom for a few more years. Or gone to college. Or saved money and traveled. Or any number of things besides marry at age 18.

 

But my life has not suffered because of my lack of college. I continue to learn and grow and plan to do so until the day I die. Sometimes I day dream about getting a degree, but the best reason I can come up with for doing so is vanity. So I doubt I ever will go. And that is ok.

[Karenciavo]

I didn't go. My mother and father needed me to help support the family. I meant to go one day, but I was making $45,000 a year in the USPS back in the 80s and wasn't sure why I'd be going. I didn't feel a calling at the time.

[Brindee]

Assuming my oldest graduates from college (and it is a pretty safe assumption that she will) she will be the first female in her direct maternal line to do so. I was the first to graduate high school.

Well, I DID graduate from college, but I wanted to make a few comments:

 

I DIDN'T finish highschool! I started working when I was 16 as a Nurse's Aid. When I was 17 I added McDonald's (hey it brought in money! ;) ), and did the aid work on the weekends. My school was a supposedly strong Christian school, but all the rich kids were on drugs, and selling them, and picking on you when you didn't buy them. The teachers, moved by the knowledge that these rich kids had rich parents that supported the school, held up these kids as role models and gave them A's. I got sick of it all and quit to work for 2 years.

 

Then I decided I wanted to go to college with a friend of mine (who HAD finished school). I passed the Highschool Equivalency test and went. How I managed, I don't know. My parents had NO money and could not help pay for it. I was a highschool dropouts, so no aid was available that way, but somehow I made it through. It took me 6 years though, because I had to work to pay for it. I'd get these notices: You're working too many hours/making too much money to keep this loan, we'll have to stop it if this doesn't change within this length of time, we'll have to take the loan away. So I'd have to work less, then I'd get notices that said, "You're not working enough, you're owing too much, you won't be able to continue to go to school here." It was pretty crazy!

 

Anyway, I DID end up graduating from college---the first one in generations of my family! So that was kind of cool! Then I only worked 4 years at that job before we got transferred to Washington. I did temp work, then gave up work to have kids, and it's been that way ever since.

 

However, the friend I wanted to go to college with dropped out at Christmas time of that first year and never went back. She went on to lead a happy life too. Both she and I were happy with the choices we made! So I don't think anyone should EVER say it's better to go or not go. I think it's whatever that person chooses to do, and you can be happy either way!

 

I must agree with those that said they didn't want to pay for someone else to tell them what to do! I disliked some of my courses so much, and some of them were irrelevant for reality! Sometimes I wish I HADN'T gone to college, there were other things I could've done and probably learned more!

 

So anyway, just putting another face on the topic! :D

[Ellie]

no one I knew well went to college. No one in my family encouraged me to go. None of my teachers encouraged me to go.

[Angel]

I didn't go to college. Very early on I knew that I wanted to be a mommy. I did want to get married and have children and didn't want to "waste" money on a degree that I wouldn't use. I came from a family who had a very successful construction business, none of whom had a college degree, so I knew you didn't need college to be successful. And I wanted to be a mommy :001_smile: My parents wanted me to try college for a year because of my grades in school (10th in my class). I agreed, applied and was accepted to Baldwin Wallace, but ended up getting married two months out of high school. I had to wait 4 years to become a mommy, though :001_smile: In the meantime, I did secretarial work. In high school I had worked my way through every business course and had spent the afternoons after school working secretarial work found by my business teacher. In other words, I was prepared to work without college.

 

I don't regret not going. I'm glad that I didn't spend thousands of my parents money on a degree that I would not use. My girls can choose if they want college or not. I will support either decision.

[Night Elf]

I went, but didn't graduate. I only went because I graduated from high school a quarter earlier than everyone else so I could work full time. A year later I was working at a state university as a clerical assistant. I saw how many really dumb kids were students and realized I could succeed if I wanted to give it a try. I started college at age 20.

 

I went off and on over many years. While I loved the ambience of the classes, I couldn't decide on an end goal. I'd be happy to be a professional student with no career goal in mind but I couldn't afford it. After I left college the last time in 2001, I owed many thousands of dollars. We finally got it paid off and I promised myself I would never again go into debt for school.

 

I'm actually in the decision making process about returning for summer semester. But really because I am totally bored. I still don't have a career goal in mind. DH thinks I should just go and have fun but I have a difficult time with spending all that money for my own personal gain (pure entertainment).

 

I have enough credits to qualify as a senior and I NEVER had to write a report longer than a 5 paragraph essay. :tongue_smilie:

[PrairieAir]

I did not go to college. Dh and I started dating midway through my senior (his junior) year. He asked me to marry him about a month or two after we started dating. I planned to take the year after graduation off. I figured I would go to college after taking a year off, but I didn't know how or where. Really I just didn't know what I wanted to do. I had a lot of grand schemes and no real plans. I have never been very good at planning my life

 

I moved to Texas with my mom and brother after my graduation and dh stayed in Ohio with his family to finish high school. I thought I was going to DIE without him.

 

I moved to Kansas a month later because his family was trying to sell their house in Ohio and would be moving back to Kansas to live near family. He moved back to Kansas before the house sold and lived with his grandmother. I got pregnant and we ended up getting married in May instead of August as we had planned. Suddenly my priorities had shifted and I was even less sure about college and a career than ever.

 

My oldest graduates in one month. My youngest will be in 6th grade next year and may be going to public school before long. My life is changing rapidly and once again I am unsure. Maybe I'll go to college. Maybe I'll do something else. I've never been very good at planning my life.

[Diana in OR]

I just want to state for the record that even though I am glad I went to college, I can totally understand someone having taken another path, and it's interesting to hear all your stories!

 

I would also say that by the time I graduated college at age 21, I was ready. If for some reason I wouldn't have graduated after 4 years, I probably would've taken some time off. As it is, there is a lot of pressure on teachers to get a Masters Degree soon after the Bachelors. After 20 years, I'm just beginning to think about that stage in the process.

[Colleen in NS]

Assuming my oldest graduates from college (and it is a pretty safe assumption that she will) she will be the first female in her direct maternal line to do so. I was the first to graduate high school.

 

So cool, Kelli! Congrats!

[Guest LLG]

I did not go to college. I took so many advanced courses in high school that by the time I graduated high school I was totally burned out on school. I was not really sure exactly what I wanted to do and I did not want to waste my parents money. Against the wishes of my parents, I "took a year off". I fell into a great job and life happened. 28 years later, I do not regret my decision at all.

[sassenach]

I went until we had our son, who was very sick, and is profoundly disabled. We realized that we would never be able/want to put him in a child care situation. I would still like to be an RN one day, but am extremely happy being a sahm. I'm also very happy that we don't have to pay student loans for a degree that I wouldn't use at this point.

[beansprouts]

I left college when I got married and never went back. I had no clear direction anyways.

[Copswife]

One of my in-laws reminds me, when the topic of college comes up at family gatherings, that I missed a slew of opportunities and could be doing 'even better' now.

 

 

Well, poo-poo. (i've been saying poo/poop/poopie a lot today :P~) Anyway, my dh would say to that - he's had recruits at the police department, that could not write a narrative in a police report and had a 4 year degree. So.....

 

That's all. :001_huh:

 

Tracoe

Hmmm. I guess that's not the right way to say what I mean.

You're right that it's not hard to hear, but for some it's hard to believe that anyone would be glad to have gone a different route..

 

I've had conversations with folks who think it's nothing to be proud of, skipping college. One of my in-laws reminds me, when the topic of college comes up at family gatherings, that I missed a slew of opportunities and could be doing 'even better' now.

 

Silly, huh?

[Copswife]

I had applied, been accepted, and then changed my mind at the last minute. Why? Because I didn't know what I wanted to do. I spent the first 22 years of my life wandering with no direction, and then---I got pregnant, and everything became clear. What was I meant to do with my life? Raise children! Don't need college for that!

 

I love this!! Thanks for sharing. :grouphug:

 

Tracie

I had applied, been accepted, and then changed my mind at the last minute. Why? Because I didn't know what I wanted to do. I spent the first 22 years of my life wandering with no direction, and then---I got pregnant, and everything became clear. What was I meant to do with my life? Raise children! Don't need college for that!