one small vent--please don't judge

[Guest Cindie2dds]

It's not her age, she's just making a foolish choice. I say that as a late-30s mom. Car seat safety is a big deal. I've never run into a mom who was that lax about buckling up.

 

Anyway, I'm totally with you. It would drive me nuts to see a child not buckled in properly.

 

Yes! I'm a late-30s mom too. My oldest is just now reaching 60 pounds. She is still in a 5-point harness seat, but soon there won't be any more slack we can give her and we will have to move her to a booster. She would be in one as long as she could fit.

 

Yesterday we were going into ToysRUs trying to find a family game (we ended up getting Blockus) when a family of five with two young kids and a newborn climbed into a Mustang convertible right next to us. Not a single car seat. I stood there with my mouth open wide frozen for a moment in the parking lot until they drove off. The Dad just held the tiny newborn in his hands! I wanted to do something, but I was so shocked I could just stand there and catch flies. My oldest did ask where their carseats were because I am always telling her she has to buckle. Just wow.

[Renee in NC]

My kids aren't in high-back boosters, but I must have way skinnier kids than average, because my 9.5 yo is about 63 pounds and one of my 12yos is still only 68 pounds. I have no trouble imagining an 8yo that's under 80 lbs.

 

I have large children (not overweight, just big.) My 7yo weighs more than 80 pounds (he's about 55 inches tall.) My 9yo is almost 5 foot and weighs 98 pounds. I was picturing my 7yo in the 5 point harness and it was :lol::lol::lol:.

 

My 12yo weighs more than twice what yours does. He is somewhat overweight, but he is also 5'4" tall.

[BamaTanya]

 

Yesterday we were going into ToysRUs trying to find a family game (we ended up getting Blockus) when a family of five with two young kids and a newborn climbed into a Mustang convertible right next to us. Not a single car seat. I stood there with my mouth open wide frozen for a moment in the parking lot until they drove off. The Dad just held the tiny newborn in his hands! I wanted to do something, but I was so shocked I could just stand there and catch flies. My oldest did ask where their carseats were because I am always telling her she has to buckle. Just wow.

 

That's the kind of thing that gives me a panic attack!

 

I'm another car seat fanatic. I wouldn't allow my toddlers/preschoolers to ride with aunts and uncles without a carseat. Eventually, it became a non-issue because they stopped asking. :tongue_smilie:

[Renee in NC]

Yes! I'm a late-30s mom too. My oldest is just now reaching 60 pounds. She is still in a 5-point harness seat, but soon there won't be any more slack we can give her and we will have to move her to a booster. She would be in one as long as she could fit.

 

Yesterday we were going into ToysRUs trying to find a family game (we ended up getting Blockus) when a family of five with two young kids and a newborn climbed into a Mustang convertible right next to us. Not a single car seat. I stood there with my mouth open wide frozen for a moment in the parking lot until they drove off. The Dad just held the tiny newborn in his hands! I wanted to do something, but I was so shocked I could just stand there and catch flies. My oldest did ask where their carseats were because I am always telling her she has to buckle. Just wow.

 

I see that alot here! It always shocks me to see it, especially with babies.

 

I am sure that some people judge me with my 7 and 9yo boys not in boosters, either, though.

[Matryoshka]

My 12yo weighs more than twice what yours does. He is somewhat overweight, but he is also 5'4" tall.

 

Heh, I know quite well how different kids can be at that age - my tiny 12yo is only 4'9" (she just got out of her booster), and her fraternal twin sister is 5'2" and a bit over 100lbs - she's been out of a booster over 2 years. :)

[Pretty in Pink]

I have no doubt that my second eldest will still be in a 5 pt harness at age 8. He still wears size 5 jeans.

 

My nearly 12 yo requires a booster in the rear, middle position of our van because the seatbelt extends from the ceiling and hits his neck. The other seat belts in the van do not do that.

 

If my seatbelt fit improperly then I'd use a booster seat. If my 13yo needed a booster seat then he'd ride in one. My kids have never argued about using carseats because it's all they've ever known and they know it's non-negotiable. I have three spare seats (a rear-facing infant seat, a forward-facing 5 pt. harness, and a booster) that I can use if necessary when friends visit if they do not provide an appropriate restraint for riding in my vehicle.

 

My 4yo was starting to complain about tight straps recently. I took the van to the fire dept. to have a new carseat installed and while we were there the firemen gave the boys a little lecture on keeping their straps tight. The boys thought it was cool and my 4yo quit giving me grief about his tight straps.

[Laura Corin]

How tall is your 10yo? I thought they were not supposed to be in the high-back booster if their head is above the back?

 

He's my shrimp - his shoulders are still below the guide slots and his head is well below the top. He's around 135cm tall.

 

Laura

[6packofun]

If I were allowed to make a citizen's arrest on people who don't have their kids buckled in, I would!! LOL If it weren't dangerous for me to be taking pics with my phone while I'm driving, I'd be gathering evidence, too. :D There's just absolutely no excuse to break the law for convenience or laziness when the safety of our kids is involved, IMO.

[Mom2J112903]

An adult's seat belt not fitting as "well" as a child's, is not as big a deal. We have the bone structure (our hips have ossified) not to submarine and cause massive internal injuries. A child does not, they are physcially too immature for the seatbelt to fit correctly.

[Mom2J112903]

How does an 8yo fit in a 5-point harness? Even the Britax Marathon only goes to 80 pounds (and the back is too short, isn't it?)

 

 

The Marathon only goes to 65lbs (well the current version) and has approx a 16.5" top harness position.

 

The prginal Frontier hads 18" top harness position and held to 80lbs, the Frontier85 has 20" top harness positions and holds to 85lbs.

 

A NT (normal) 8yr old would be perfectly safe in a booster-given it is used correctly each and every time. IE no moving/slouching/lap belt across the lap, and shoulder belt centered on the shoulder.

[Guest Cindie2dds]

I see that alot here! It always shocks me to see it, especially with babies.

 

I am sure that some people judge me with my 7 and 9yo boys not in boosters, either, though.

 

A 7 & 9 yo is very different from a newborn in the front seat, held by Dad. I just can't imagine people thinking it's okay. Of course, I was completely dumbfounded and useless. I'm not even sure there was anything I could do about it. They were so casual, not even sneaking like they brought the wrong car or something. Oh, well, I hope nothing happens to the kids.

 

My oldest is big for her age. She's only got about two inches of slack left on her 5-point harness booster, so she'll be in a backless booster soon, too.

[msjones]

Because of the airbags. Did you read this, posted by matroyshka earlier in the thread?

 

Well, there you have it. Thanks for the link.

 

I haven't seen much loose-car-seat-buckling, but I do see folks allowing their preteens to ride in front.

 

When the van is packed full of kids, I've allowed 11 or 12 year-olds up there. I believe the WA law says they go in the back seat "when practical." So, I've put the oldest of the crew up there a few times with the seat back as far as it will go.

 

What do people do about pickup trucks?

[Perry]

 

As an aside to Perry--

You are sweet. Thank you for making my day.

[PinkInTheBlue]

My family hasn't ever made fun of or given me a hard time about my car safety but I know sometimes they don't understand. They are nice enough to be sure and do what I ask and that's all that matters.

 

My 14yr old is 5'8" and 130lbs. He's only been sitting up front occasionally for about 6mths. My 12 yr old just hit 5ft tall but he's a light weight. I don't really let him sit up front. They both sat in boosters until the boosters made them too tall for the seatbelt and it was time to move it out. They only began com plainly ligtly when they began getting close to the age/size I was about to move it out. :) It was tough on the middle guy when the bigger guy lost his booster and he didn't. I just said, "Tough stuff" and left his in. :)

 

Our 4yr old is still in his 5pt Britax and remain in it until max weight or height. Then he also will move to an equally safe seat until it's just not necessary. It's just the way it is in this family; no arguements allowed.

 

However, I remember being a small child and sitting on the hump between the front two seats or playing in the hallows behind the front seats with my dolls and toys on trips. We cousins would all play in the back of my granddad's pick up under the camper during the 3hr trip to the beach for a family trip. If I got sleepy I just took off my seatbelt (if I was wearing one) and laid down to sleep. We became seatbelt aware in my early teens and have been that way since. My how the times have changed! :)

[Harriet Vane]

You are sweet. Thank you for making my day.

 

:thumbup1:

[naturegirl7]

Sadly, some people just don't get it.

 

I have really strict rules - My car, my rules. My kiddo, my rules. I don't care about their own personal views. I was in a car accident with my son in the back - and it was the fact that his carseat was installed properly AND he was sitting in it properly adjusted that kept him from being hurt. The carseat foam actually cracked and dented from his little head an the force of it flying forward and then back. I was hurt, but surprisingly he was perfectly fine (even more amazing considering the damage to the carseat). If he had not been in his seat properly, I am scared to think of what would have happened to him.

 

When people ride in my car - they buckle up or the car doesn't move. When other kiddos come for a ride, our second carseat is installed cuz I don't trust the average carseats on the market and am super anal about HOW it fits in.

 

I only allow DS to ride in certain cars with certain people driving. One of the factors is how his seat fits into the car - not all cars work well with our carseats (or carseats in general).

 

I know this is kinda different cuz they aren't your kiddos. Personally I would try to educate them (aka bang my head against a brick wall) and personally adjust them properly. (I am a nudge when it comes to kiddos LOL) If they got upset or loosened them back up, then refuse to ride in their car with them. I will not condone or participate in the blatant disregard of a babes safety.

[gpsings]

Because you're educated. As homeschoolers, we should know full well that people are really mean about things they are ignorant about. Our parents probably top that list on a lot of parenting issues. :( We have more information now, and technology, not to mention...more cars on the road and less safe conditions for raising a child.

[mom2jjka]

My family used to roll their eyes at me, too - Especially that I rear-faced my daughter to 3 1/2, and my kids ride in boosters until they are 12.

 

When I took the CPST class, I gained a bit more credibility with them, and then I was even interviewed for a local magazine about carseat safety. I handed that article out to all my relatives. ;-)

 

Eventually some of it sank in, and now my cousin even got certified as a 'tech', too! :)

[dirty ethel rackham]

If I were allowed to make a citizen's arrest on people who don't have their kids buckled in, I would!!

 

Oh great! Now I can't get this image out of my head ... Gomer Pyle hollering "Citizen's arrest! Citizen's arrest!" at Barny Fife for making an illegal u-turn.

[Mommy22alyns]

 

She also thinks I'm nuts for always taking the extra 5-10 to heat up the car in winter so I can put my kids in without bulky winter coats. The fact that you can't get a carseat buckled tightly enough over those coats is just plain silly to a lot of people.

 

 

 

 

:glare: MIL always used to ask Becca if she wasn't cold and acted like it was tragic that we buckled her in her carseat without her winter coat. It's flat out unsafe to buckle over a bulky coat!

[jillian]

:glare: MIL always used to ask Becca if she wasn't cold and acted like it was tragic that we buckled her in her carseat without her winter coat. It's flat out unsafe to buckle over a bulky coat!

I admit I will put dd in her seat in the winter with slightly heavier clothes but NEVER a winter coat (by heavier clothes I mean a long sleeve tee covered by a sweater or lightweight/mid-weight jacket...however i never have to loosen the straps to get it strapped in. We put a jacket on backwards over her once she's buckled though

[Hannah C.]

Random technical question: How in the world do you get a 3.5 year old into a rear-facing car seat?? :001_huh: From what I remember of when my siblings were younger, any rear-facing car seat would have been too small for them by the time they were that age. They fit fine when the same seat faced forward however. Rear facing just didn't give them any leg room.

 

Are certain seats just bigger, so the kids have leg room? Or are three year olds just smaller than I remember? :001_smile:

[TravelingChris]

I remember that I had to move my kids sooner from the back-facing way to the front then by their weight. They were all too tall to be in a back facing way.

 

My youngest is now 13.5. She only sits in the front sometimes in the truck where we can turn off the air bag. We will have to decide what we will do when she gets a bit older. If she still has osteoporosis, we will be removing airbags.

[Mom in High Heels]

How does an 8yo fit in a 5-point harness? Even the Britax Marathon only goes to 80 pounds (and the back is too short, isn't it?)

 

Nope the one he's in (I can't remember the name goes up to 85lbs (100lbs converted to a booster with the seatbelt). He's well under 85lbs and the height limit (57"). I'll keep him in it until he reaches 57" or 85lbs, whichever comes first and then we'll convert it to the booster. He loves his seat. It's far more comfortable especially on long trips.

[Renee in NC]

Nope the one he's in (I can't remember the name goes up to 85lbs (100lbs converted to a booster with the seatbelt). He's well under 85lbs and the height limit (57"). I'll keep him in it until he reaches 57" or 85lbs, whichever comes first and then we'll convert it to the booster. He loves his seat. It's far more comfortable especially on long trips.

 

Ahhh. My 7yo is past those numbers - I thought he was too tall!

[Mom2J112903]

Random technical question: How in the world do you get a 3.5 year old into a rear-facing car seat?? :001_huh: From what I remember of when my siblings were younger, any rear-facing car seat would have been too small for them by the time they were that age. They fit fine when the same seat faced forward however. Rear facing just didn't give them any leg room.

 

Are certain seats just bigger, so the kids have leg room? Or are three year olds just smaller than I remember? :001_smile:

 

Seats come in a variety of sizes, some do allow more room for the ERF (extended rear facing) crew than others.

 

There has never been a case of broken legs due to ERF. Yet there has been cases of broken necks due to FFing. Broken legs-cast it, broken neck-casket.

[MotherGoose]

My stepmother-in-law let my 4 yo ride in her car TWICE (and lied about it) with NO carseat at all. She won't be driving my daughter around anymore. I understand!

[vonfirmath]

I think it's probably a generational thing. My parents are always complaining that they think the straps on my kids' seats are too tight and it's too hard to buckle them in. I blame my pediatrician and say she told me too follow the "two finger" rule. They also complain about the at least 60 lbs. rule for booster seats and I tell them to bring it up with the state legislature :glare:

 

Unfortunately, it is not generational. I've got friends my age and younger that think I'm too "uptight" about car seat stuff and "We made it right?" (including my sister, though after the first comment, she's shut up)

 

There have also been cases of broken legs FFing. My son will be 3 in August and is rear-facing in the Britax Marathon--and has plenty of room for his legs. Maybe eventually he'll run out of leg room. But since he is 32.5 pounds right now, I think he'll outgrow it by weight first.

 

My Britax Marathon (and the ones being sold currently in the United States--> new ones are coming out later this summer. August? I think) go up to 35 pounds rear facing and 65 pounds forward facing. And the height is enough to get most kids to 35 pounds rear facing in the seat. (though most do not reach 65 pounds forward facing. They out grow by height first)

 

The Graco nautilus (A FFing seat that converts into both a high back and a no back booster) also has a limit of 65 pounds on the harness, but the seat height is greater so it will actually fit more kids to 65 pounds.

 

There is a Britax Frontier 85 that came out recently that is NOT a convertible (does not install rear facing at all). It goes up to 85 pounds forward facing and to "over 100 pounds" in booster mode. And to accommodate this, it has a higher seat height.

Edited July 8, 2010 by vonfirmath

[vonfirmath]

I see that alot here! It always shocks me to see it, especially with babies.

 

I am sure that some people judge me with my 7 and 9yo boys not in boosters, either, though.

 

I know very few kids that fit lap-shoulder seatbelts properly without a booster at 7 (and lap only belts are safe only for keeping harnessed seats buckled to the car). (And in our state, it is against the law for a child under 8 to sit without a booster)

 

The reason for boosters these days is because they discovered that lap-only belts were causing serious internal injuries in an accident. So they went to using lap-shoulder belts in all positions -- except that these lap-shoulder belts are designed for use by adults (and us smaller adults have problems getting them to fit us properly too!). So suddenly a bunch more children need boosting up so that the lap-shoulder belt can fit them properly in the car, slung across their breast bone/the strongest part of their body from shoulder to thigh.

 

Here is the 5 Step Test for determining if a child is able to sit in a particular seat without needing a booster: http://carseatblog.com/?p=3966

 

(yes, kids sometimes need booster in one car/seat and not in a different one because the answers to these questions vary based on the seat)

[lailasmum]

We've decide to stay with high backed boosters as long as we can. I have heard of too many local accidents to ever risk it any other way. My youngest is still in a 5 point harness.

 

One little 5 yr old girl i know of who is a pupil at the school my mum works at had a dreadful accident early last year which nearly killed her. She got away with mild brain damage and many broken bones and internal injuries and about a year in hospital. A bus hit the car she was travelling in on windy lanes and the fire and rescue people came to the conclusion that she basically went straight through the adult seat belt she was in as if it wasn't there, it was just too big.

 

There was another accident close to that about a fortnight ago. Fire and rescue are quoted as saying that the only reason the 2 kids got out of the car alive was because of good quality car seats which were properly used. They weren't expecting survivors.

 

A lot of my friends use boosters without high backs in cars without rear head rests which I know puts the child at risk of whiplash. I don't think they realise.

[Mom in High Heels]

Ahhh. My 7yo is past those numbers - I thought he was too tall!

 

Your 7 year old is over 57"? That's 4'9"! Wowzer! And everyone comments on how tall Indy is. He's 53" and is the tallest 7 year old we know. He's at least 3" taller than all of his friends, even those who are already 8 or 9.

[jillian]

to add to it, i saw them today and her preemies (just hit the adjusted age of newborn), including her barely 5lb tiny baby (Simon) all had their harness straps falling off their shoulders and so loose that all their hands were stuck through the middle of the straps AND their chest clips were so far down that they were touching their crotch straps.

 

I am so mad, I almost cried and yelled

[StartingOver]

It's not her age, she's just making a foolish choice. I say that as a late-30s mom. Car seat safety is a big deal. I've never run into a mom who was that lax about buckling up.

 

Anyway, I'm totally with you. It would drive me nuts to see a child not buckled in properly.

 

I am 41 with kids in their 20's and babies. I install all the babies and grandbabies carseats ! I would go nuts if one of mine didn't follow car seat safety.

 

I am the car seat nazi, I call on people who don't have their children restrained properly. I will follow them till the cops catch up to us too, the local cops know me well. :D

 

I can not stand lazy parents.

[Guest janainaz]

We all have different fears, I guess.

 

I remember when my youngest ds was a toddler, about a year old. He was learning to walk and still wobbly. I was hovering over him, and constanly pulling rocks from his hands that he thought belonged in his mouth. I watched other mothers as they enjoyed conversation and laughter. Their kids were the same age, yet they seemed to be completely immune of any worry whatsoever. In fact, so much so, that I watched a toddler girl walk out to a busy street while the mother chatted carelessly on her cell phone. I ran quickly to rescue her daughter, and brought her in one piece, back to her disconnected mother.

 

I don't know and I don't get it, but it is what it is. Be a car seat freak and let yourself be ok with it. Maybe some mom will thank you someday, or maybe you'll save the life of your own child. We all seem to think and care about such different things, and maybe there is reason for that.:tongue_smilie:

[Tam101]

my aunt i could understand a little bit (she's in her late 30s)

 

 

Geezz...I hope late 30's isn't too old to understand carseat safety! I have a foot in the grave at 44 and I'm a carseat nazi! :lol:

 

My In-Laws refused to take my son anywhere until he was out of his booster. Since I wouldn't let him not ride without it, he never got to go any place with Grandma and Grandpa until he was 7. :(

[jillian]

Geezz...I hope late 30's isn't too old to understand carseat safety! I have a foot in the grave at 44 and I'm a carseat nazi! :lol:

 

My In-Laws refused to take my son anywhere until he was out of his booster. Since I wouldn't let him not ride without it, he never got to go any place with Grandma and Grandpa until he was 7. :(

i didn't mean it was because she was old lol, just more that she didn't grow up with the car seat safety knowledge that we have now and doesn't choose to educate herself

[mom2jjka]

Random technical question: How in the world do you get a 3.5 year old into a rear-facing car seat?? :001_huh: From what I remember of when my siblings were younger, any rear-facing car seat would have been too small for them by the time they were that age. They fit fine when the same seat faced forward however. Rear facing just didn't give them any leg room.

 

Are certain seats just bigger, so the kids have leg room? Or are three year olds just smaller than I remember? :001_smile:

 

 

She's on the petite side weight-wise, but very long legged.

As others have mentioned it is perfectly acceptable for them to sit with their legs crossed, and I'm much more worried about her neck and spine that I am her legs. ;)

Edited July 10, 2010 by mom2jjka

[jillian]

 

She's on the petite side weight-wise, but very long legged.

As others have mentioned it is perfectly acceptable for them to sit with their legs crossed, and I'm much more worried about her neck and spine that I am her legs. ;)

this is like my dd but we turned her at 2 1/2. She easily could've been RF for awhile by height (because her legs didn't factor in much to her torso height) but weight wise she was rapidly approaching the limits of one seat (only to 33 RF limit)--she was hovering around 31 or so steadily (she's lost a bit of weight though since then since she's more active now that it's nice weather). Our MyRide has a higher RF limit--40lbs but dh thought if we turn in one seat we should turn in both. I want to turn her RF again but dh says it's pointless since she's used to being FF. I might turn her again though when he goes out to sea next lol

[babysparkler]

why do i seem to be the only one of my IRL friends who care about car seat safety?!? My aunt and one of my friends both insist on leaving the car seat straps so loose that their kids can get out of them and I could fit an infant on top of a toddler in these harnesses. No matter how I phrase it I am deemed one of the following:

1. "car seat nazi"

2. "too worried, nothing is going to happen to them"

3. "insane/crazy/some take of these"

 

 

Why am I the only one who seems to give a flying f*** about car seat safety. It isn't like we live in a tiny town where the speed limit doesn't go over 25, we live in Houston (or at least they do), do most of their traveling (to/from work, school, errands) on very busy roads with a speed limit of 45 or more and/or on freeways w/ a speed limit of 60+

 

It stresses me out, I won't take the kids anywhere ever without tightening seat(s) and will not ever put them in their seats anymore--i refuse to enable them.

 

it upsets me so much but i can't do anything about it, i can't say anything. *sigh*

 

sorry just a rant.

 

We have more than just a name in common... I'm right there with you!