s/o from Teens with Hookah

[5knights3maidens]

I noticed alot of you would not have called the police even though the poster said one girl couldn't stand up.

This is what happened to us yesterday. I met my friend at the park (with our kids). She told me to look a certain way. A young man and woman were actually in the process of "making tea". (They were near a very large tree but you could still see them. The park is huge. Would you have called the police?

I waited a little bit to see if they would stop since there were kids all over (6 of ours and someone else came along with grandchildren). Well, they didn't so, I walked over to the police dept. because it is right near there. They did get into trouble.

I felt like a tattle tale but really couldn't see that this was the best place for "tea". :D

[Cricket]

We wouldn't call because dh would have probably said something to them. If I was by myself, I wouldn't call. If I happened to see an officer nearby, I would say something. I'm always hesitant to call the police for some reason. I tend to think that is for emergencies I guess.

[Peela]

Nope. I tend to save police for more serious issues, also.

[ThatCyndiGirl]

Nope. I tend to save police for more serious issues, also.

 

 

I think I would have yelled "Get a room!" and tried to shame them into more publicly acceptable behaviour, but no, the police are for emergencies, not "I think kids are smoking pot" or "I don't know if it's pot, but they are smoking tobacco!''

 

I don't think that the police should be called out just for someone else's moral outrage.

[AndyJoy]

I would have called the cops in a heartbeat. It's a public place where other people can see them, for crying out loud. If they were right in the middle of the kiddie play area, would people call then? How close is too close? Would you call if some guy was peeing in the park where others could see him? What if he was being exhibitionist? The cops would not blow you off for this--it is totally within the bounds of their job.

 

I'm curious about this line between "moral outrage" and an emergency. What about shoplifting, vandalism, hitting a parked car and driving off, etc. where no one is in physical peril? Having s*x in pubic and minors smoking anything is illegal, not just morally offensive to others.

Edited June 19, 2010 by AndyJoy

[shannatheshedevil]

Nope. Cops need to be available for serious things, not nonsense like that. I'd probably tell them to move on.

[kalanamak]

I noticed alot of you would not have called the police even though the poster said one girl couldn't stand up.

 

 

Well, there seem to be waves of teens who like to come and sit on the big fake rocks in the large playground we go to. Besides being rather foul-mouthed, I have discovered there are 2 ways for the girls to get attention. One is to talk loudly about sex (oral seems to be popular) and the other is to be all wobbly and leaning on guy after guy, like a slow-motion ball in a pinball machine. Since I have seen these same "intoxicated" girls suddenly straighten up when a pack run off to the portapotties, I wonder if it is something along the lines of the old joke:

 

What is a sorority-girls mating call?

 

(slurred) I'm so drunk.

 

I, too, would have shouted "get a room", and to my son, well-familiar from nature videos, would discuss how people can be 1) so selfish they think of no one around them or 2) so insecure they have to act in loud or noticeable ways to feel important, and how stupid it makes them look.

 

We have that chat regularly, sigh, and he has asked me if there is any vegetable he can eat that will accelerate his growth such that he will skip his teen years.:lol: I now point out nice teens behaving in reasonable ways, like the two boys next door, thank God for small favors.

[shannatheshedevil]

I think I would have yelled "Get a room!" and tried to shame them into more publicly acceptable behaviour, but no, the police are for emergencies, not "I think kids are smoking pot" or "I don't know if it's pot, but they are smoking tobacco!''

 

I don't think that the police should be called out just for someone else's moral outrage.

:iagree:

[Jean in Newcastle]

Since obviously I did call the police for something less than an "emergency", let me tell you why I did. The police are there to enforce the law. It is against the law to do certain things. I spent 5 minutes telling the dispatcher in much greater detail than I did here, what I observed. The dispatcher or possibly the police dept. (I don't know the protocol) has the right to do "triage" in deciding 1. whether to send out an officer(s) 2. what priority to place on the call.

 

What I called them for was not the kind of silliness that I've heard them complain about on the news - a child who wouldn't go to bed or wanting to know a police term for a crossword puzzle. That is dangerous not because they would send out an officer (they wouldn't) but because it ties up the dispatchers so that other calls can't come through.

 

Before I called last night I saw 3 police cars busy pulling over speeding drivers 2 blocks from the park. I'm sure they decided if that was more important than going to check out the teens. So, while I did feel silly going home and googling hookah and finding out that it could be used just for tobacco and I wouldn't have called for a group of even obviously young teens smoking cigarettes, I don't feel that calling for perceived marijuana use was wrong.

 

Re. the "making tea" - it would depend on if it was heavy petting - in which case we would go to another part of the park. If it was more than that then yes, I would call. There are laws against indecent exposure, etc. and I would let the dispatcher decide what priority to put on it.

 

Perhaps this would be different if I lived in a high crime area. We don't. There have been zero murders or rapes in our city of 10,000 in the last 5 years as reported by our city newspaper. The biggest crime problem is car break-ins. (PS. I called and reported it when our car was broken into but nothing was taken. The dispatcher chose to have me make an oral report of the crime. She was glad I called because it helps them to see patterns of criminal behavior etc.)

[Osmosis Mom]

Well, I think it depends on the community you are in. In a small community I think calling the police is reasonable. We were recently at a playground right after the time high school is let out and it was full of only teens incl. a group obviously smoking pot and another group flirting/touching inappropraitely. We left. I did not call the police but would have liked to since to me pot might eventually lead down another road....

 

Reason I didn't call was that it would have been obvious who would have called since I was the only one there.

[Country Mouse]

If I were in a public park with my ds and there were people having s*x in front of children, yes I would absolutely call the police.

[Peela]

I would have called the cops in a heartbeat. It's a public place where other people can see them, for crying out loud. If they were right in the middle of the kiddie play area, would people call then? How close is too close? Would you call if some guy was peeing in the park where others could see him? What if he was being exhibitionist? The cops would not blow you off for this--it is totally within the bounds of their job.

 

I'm curious about this line between "moral outrage" and an emergency. What about shoplifting, vandalism, hitting a parked car and driving off, etc. where no one is in physical peril? Having s*x in pubic and minors smoking anything is illegal, not just morally offensive to others.

 

Yes, it might be illegal, but it isnt actually hurting anyone else. It is your morality that is being offended and affected, not your body or possessions. That is the difference. If someone runs a red light safely, or overtakes without turning on their indicator, would you call the cops? You get morally outraged everytime someone breaks the law? You must get outraged a lot!

 

No, I would certainly not call a cop for someone peeing in the bushes. Wish I could do it myself at times (inconspicuously).

 

Yes, I would call the cops for serious theft, assault, and possibly if people were having sex in the kiddie playground and I wanted to use it, and they werent getting the hint from my standing there looking at them or saying something! I have walked along a beach and seen people making out in the dunes- big deal. I don't have to look. If a woman was being raped- very different matter.

 

Moral outrage is your choice but there are far more important things , I feel to get upset about.

[ThatCyndiGirl]

and minors smoking anything is illegal, not just morally offensive to others.

 

 

Again, minors BUYING tobacco products is illegal. It is not illegal (in the states I have lived in, anyway) for minors to smoke, it is the "selling of tobacco or tobacco products to minors" that is illegal. I imagine that if a police officer had his time WASTED on a teen with a cigarette he/she would likely say,"Do you think this is a good thing to do?" but what do you think the cop is gonna do? Haul the kid in? Write a citation? Doubtful.

[5knights3maidens]

They did get a citation. And to clarify, she was on top thoroughly enjoying herself, and I'm sure he was too. :D Definitely not "heavy petting". :lol:

 

The police did say they want know about these happenings. I was a little embarrassed and the police were not. ;)

 

Thanks for all the replies. It was nice reading what every one else's thoughts are. :)

[Country Mouse]

I am curious, if you were in a park and saw a man by himself, "making tea," in public view, would you call the authorities?

[Jennifer in MI]

Well, I think it depends on the community you are in. In a small community I think calling the police is reasonable.

:iagree: We live in a very small community and the police respond to things like this all the time. We have a park at a local elementary school where our Little League games are played. There was a group of children who would show up and behave VERY inappropriately (LOTS of wild play, stealing, drinking, etc). The Little League board met with the police and asked what they should do. The police urged them to call. Parents started calling and the kids realized that they couldn't hang out there anymore.

 

I'm VERY grateful that in our community the police are here for us for all kinds of things - not just emergencies.

[Impish]

Its not about 'moral outrage'. Its about breaking the law. If it were simply moral outrage, there wouldn't be a law against it, imo.

 

I think its ridiculous how self centred society has become (ie having 'tea' in a public place frequented by children).

 

I called the police because minors were drinking alcohol at the park, in the middle of the afternoon. And I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

 

People who break the law count on others shrugging it off as no big deal, not hurting anyone. Speeding is no 'big deal'...until someone is run over because the dipstick behind the wheel, speeding, couldn't stop in time.

[Just Robyn]

Again, minors BUYING tobacco products is illegal. It is not illegal (in the states I have lived in, anyway) for minors to smoke, it is the "selling of tobacco or tobacco products to minors" that is illegal. I imagine that if a police officer had his time WASTED on a teen with a cigarette he/she would likely say,"Do you think this is a good thing to do?" but what do you think the cop is gonna do? Haul the kid in? Write a citation? Doubtful.

 

Around here a minor caught smoking is told by the police to break all their cigarettes. If it were loose tobacco I suppose they would be told to throw it away. I'm not sure what would happen if you did not comply.

[Mejane]

I think I would have yelled "Get a room!"

 

I've done this once or twice; it seems to do the trick. No cops necessary. I think sometimes hormones rule their brains and they forget where they are. I'm no prude, but I don't want to watch a porno in the park in the company of my kids. :glare:

[Mrs Mungo]

I would call the cops in the case of making tea in public, in the open, during the day, with kids present. Confronting them would work with some people, but with other people you could get yourself in trouble.

 

I have called the cops for people smoking pot on the playground, but not for people smoking pot on an isolated hiking trail.

 

Again, it's not necessarily about illegal activities. You can buy tobacco-free and/or nicotine-free products for use in a hookah.

[KristenS]

Don't forget, folks, you don't have to call 911 to report these things ... especially smokers and, er, tea makers ... they aren't in a hurry! Call the non-emergency number ... it doesn't tie up the emergency lines. And the police DO need to know about these things. If it happens in the daytime, it can happen at night too ... and perhaps with not such willing partners. Would YOU want your neighborhood park to turn into the next teen parking area? AND it is illegal.

 

The security guards used to catch kids in the stairwell at our public library!!! And it's NOT a private stairwell...

[Peela]

I am curious, if you were in a park and saw a man by himself, "making tea," in public view, would you call the authorities?

 

Possibly. More likely than in the couple scenario, because I would be concerned that he was predatory.

[WishboneDawn]

I think I'd consider Barbara Coloroso's advice, "Are you telling to get them into trouble or out of trouble?"

Edited June 20, 2010 by WishboneDawn
Removed unreasoned comment

[EmilyK]

Honestly, I wouldn't have called, but I don't think it is wrong to do so as long as (here -- I realize the rules are different elsewhere) you don't call 911. Here we have a police non-emergency line and that would be the one appropriate to use. And it can be a good idea to call it, especially when there are recurring problems. I've used it to report drug deals or similar activity in the park near us. I know they factor it into when to turn on the lights (in that park the auto lights got turned off because of neighbor complaints, and then the drug deals started) and how often to have a patrol car come by.

[Irene Lynn]

I would have done the same thing you did. I don't "make tea" in front of my kids or anyone else's kids and don't expect anyone else to do it in front of my kids. Period.

 

I won't stop them from doing that activity, but there is a place and a public park near children is not the place. If they have no more judgment than that, then they need to be told. I wouldn't call for kissing and some touching, but, come on..., making tea?! Yep, I'd walk over to the police, too.

[MyBlueLobsters]

If I were in a public park with my ds and there were people having s*x in front of children, yes I would absolutely call the police.

 

 

:iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree:

 

Without a doubt.

[Karen in CO]

 

I don't think that the police should be called out just for someone else's moral outrage.

 

 

:iagree:

I would call the police for person or property crimes but not for something that is more of a moral issue. It is kind of a slippery slope between this and arresting and beating people for kissing in public. Moral police are moral police. I've lived in cities that have tried to enforce a ban on thong bathing suits and force breastfeeding women to cover up. How far is that from arresting women for wearing "indecent" clothing? That isn't the world I want to live in.

[Heather in Neverland]

Wait. Isn't public sex illegal? Something along the lines of indecent exposure? If there is an actual law against it, it is no longer simply a "moral" issue, right?

 

If I am at a public park with my young children and an adult couple is actually engaging in intercourse out in the open where the children can see it? Uh, yeah..I am calling the police.

 

To me, there is something WRONG with two adults who CHOOSE to have intercourse in a public park in front of other people's CHILDREN. That's not just moral outrage...that is anti-social behavior.

[AndyJoy]

Yes, it might be illegal, but it isnt actually hurting anyone else. It is your morality that is being offended and affected, not your body or possessions. That is the difference. If someone runs a red light safely, or overtakes without turning on their indicator, would you call the cops? You get morally outraged everytime someone breaks the law? You must get outraged a lot!

 

"Moral outrage" was your phrase, not mine. I never applied it to my thoughts on people breaking the law. That would be way too strong of a sentiment for me to experience over traffic violations. :D However, I see a HUGE difference between running a red light (without hitting anyone) and having s*x in public and you could probably describe my reaction to the latter as moral indignation.

 

No, I would certainly not call a cop for someone peeing in the bushes. Wish I could do it myself at times (inconspicuously).

 

My hypothetical scenario involved someone being conspicuous about it. I understand desperation and wouldn't call about someone being discreet.

 

Yes, I would call the cops for serious theft, assault, and possibly if people were having sex in the kiddie playground and I wanted to use it, and they werent getting the hint from my standing there looking at them or saying something!

 

I don't understand your distinction between "serious theft" and other acts that you consider worthy of summoning the police to handle. Where do you draw the line between the theft of a candy bar and a car? Is it based on a dollar amount? When would you call if you saw an argument that wasn't "assault" yet but was spiraling out of control? Does it change from a moral issue to an emergency if the other person is only physically hurt?

 

I have walked along a beach and seen people making out in the dunes- big deal. I don't have to look. If a woman was being raped- very different matter.

 

I've passed couples "making out" as well. Unless this euphemism means something different to you than me, having s*x is a much bigger deal.

 

Moral outrage is your choice but there are far more important things , I feel to get upset about.

 

Sure, there are more important things to get upset about as well in my thinking. Plus, it's not like I would be stewing, obsessing, freaking out and wringing my hands for hours, days, or weeks afterward. I would calmly call the cops and move on. I wouldn't call 911, just the non-emergency police line. I think it is inappropriate and needs to be dealt with, but it wouldn't make me start a crusade or an organization devoted to stamping out the problem!

 

There are much more important things to be upset about in the world, but this is one thing I can do something about immediately. Movie theaters can get in trouble for letting teens voluntarily watched R rated movies, but this couple gets a free pass for inflicting an R rated scene on passers-by? Then again, I don't know your views on whether the movie theater should get in trouble, either, as no one is physically hurt.

[AndyJoy]

Wait. Isn't public sex illegal? Something along the lines of indecent exposure? If there is an actual law against it, it is no longer simply a "moral" issue, right?

 

If I am at a public park with my young children and an adult couple is actually engaging in intercourse out in the open where the children can see it? Uh, yeah..I am calling the police.

 

To me, there is something WRONG with two adults who CHOOSE to have intercourse in a public park in front of other people's CHILDREN. That's not just moral outrage...that is anti-social behavior.

:iagree: I think there is a definite exhibitionist element to it. I doubt it's just extreme, off the charts lack of self-control.

[fivetails]

 

If I am at a public park with my young children and an adult couple is actually engaging in intercourse out in the open where the children can see it? Uh, yeah..I am calling the police.

 

 

:iagree:

 

My kids should be able to play at a park without having to see some couple bumping uglies.

 

(Okay - if there was a garden hose handy, I might not call the cops right away...)