s/o those who don't allow daiting, do you teach safer sex?

[st_claire]

Really interesting answers so far. Thank you all for sharing.

[Dobela]

 

Of course, but a parent specifically teaching their children about methods to prevent STD's doesn't mesh with teaching abstinence. at. all.

I disagree. I think it goes hand in hand. I was raised in a Christian home and heard all about abstinence but never about STDs. I finally moved out after college and eventually fell away from church and lost my virginity. I thought the only reason I would want a partner to use a condom was to prevent pregnancy. Pregnancy was the only thing I thought could go wrong with premarital sex. Then, later, I contracted an STD and was in for the education of a lifetime. HPV. It led to infertility, embarassment, serious health scares, and more. How I wish someone had taught me more than "because God says so" before I left home. I would have made much wiser decisions.

[Lovedtodeath]

At least...not in my opinion. :D

LOL! I know, I didn't preface my strong words with opinion.

 

In my world it just looks differently. My children will not be associating with other young adults that have sex outside of marriage. My children will not be in group situations in which others are "pairing off" or "coupling up". My children will not be alone with a member of the opposite sex. So I don't see it as a circumstance of them deciding to disobey me.

 

By the time they move out of the house I am sure that they will know about condoms. (Isn't that the only "safer sex" option for preventing STI's?) They will definitely know about STI's.

Edited July 18, 2009 by Lovedtodeath

[runninmommy]

I posted the answer in my previous post. Sexually transmitted infection.

 

I did not see it. Apologies.

[st_claire]

I disagree. I think it goes hand in hand. I was raised in a Christian home and heard all about abstinence but never about STDs. I finally moved out after college and eventually fell away from church and lost my virginity. I thought the only reason I would want a partner to use a condom was to prevent pregnancy. Pregnancy was the only thing I thought could go wrong with premarital sex. Then, later, I contracted an STD and was in for the education of a lifetime. HPV. It led to infertility, embarassment, serious health scares, and more. How I wish someone had taught me more than "because God says so" before I left home. I would have made much wiser decisions.

 

:grouphug:

[st_claire]

LOL! I know, I didn't preface my strong words with opinion.

 

In my world it just looks differently. My children will not be associating with other young adults that have sex outside of marriage. My children will not be in group situations in which others are "pairing off" or "coupling up". My children will not be alone with a member of the opposite sex. So I don't see it as a circumstance of them deciding to disobey me.

 

By the time they move out of the house I am sure that they will know about condoms. (Isn't that the only "safer sex" option for preventing STI's?) They will definitely know about STI's.

 

 

Will they be alone with the same sex? No reason your children might not prefer to be sexual with the same gender.

And nope, condoms are only part of it. Regular testing is important. As is getting detailed histories. As are barriers for any kind of sexual activity, so dental dams for example. As are vaccines. etc...

[st_claire]

I did not see it. Apologies.

 

 

No problemo :)

[Lovedtodeath]

Will they be alone with the same sex? No reason your children might not prefer to be sexual with the same gender.

And nope, condoms are only part of it. Regular testing is important. As is getting detailed histories. As are barriers for any kind of sexual activity, so dental dams for example. As are vaccines. etc...

Thank you for the further clarification.

[lionfamily1999]

Will they be alone with the same sex? No reason your children might not prefer to be sexual with the same gender.

And nope, condoms are only part of it. Regular testing is important. As is getting detailed histories. As are barriers for any kind of sexual activity, so dental dams for example. As are vaccines. etc...

I think Carmen meant, why did you ask, when you already know you're right? You aren't interested in other points of view, you're only interesting in saying they're wrong.

[Retired]

well I grew up in Christian home, no sex before marriage, etc.

 

had premarital sex no thought about STDs, only concern with birth control

 

I was blessed to not have any adverse problems

 

My boys are being raised that sex out of marriage is morally wrong but forgivable. They are very informed about STD's and all forms of birth control

 

I absolutely hope they choose to wait till marriage. We encourage our boys to not date until they are older. I would even encourage courtship but I am also in the camp that I am raising men to think for themselves. I can't see telling my 18 yo if they can date or not. This has to been their decision.

[lionfamily1999]

Having seen the "funny" you posted, it's more obvious.

[Lovedtodeath]

 

Having seen the "funny" you posted, it's more obvious.

:confused: Nevermind, thanks for explaining in the PM. Edited July 18, 2009 by Lovedtodeath

[CatMomof3]

When the time is right for my children to know, my dh and I will tell them. The good the bad and the ugly. We will study the Theology of the Body (the good), we will talk about contraceptives and STDs (the bad), and abortion (the ugly). We will talk about how sex is a beautiful gift from God and through that gift life can (but not always) occur. But also just like any gift it can be cheapened and misused, and that they are the ones control of that.

[EKS]

Pre-amble: This isn't meant to provoke or anything, I'm honestly curious.

 

So if your child decides to have sex regardless of your wishes, will they be aware of the risks and ways to minimize those risks?

 

Also, what if their spouse has an sti? Married sex may still have risks.

 

:iagree:

[Lovedtodeath]

Well, there is that as well yes. But I was thinking more of "Mom I'm going to the movies with Susie" and then your daughter goes and parks with John instead kind of thing.

No movies without an adult chaperone. Periodic checks to be sure that they are really at their job.;)

 

Also, what if their spouse has an sti? Married sex may still have risks.

I hadn't really thought about discussing a potential mate's history. That is not a bad idea.

[Jill- OK]

Having seen the "funny" you posted, it's more obvious.

 

Yeah, I just saw that, too.

 

I guess it's better to know what someone really thinks of you, though.

[Pink Fairy]

Will they be alone with the same sex? No reason your children might not prefer to be sexual with the same gender.

And nope, condoms are only part of it. Regular testing is important. As is getting detailed histories. As are barriers for any kind of sexual activity, so dental dams for example. As are vaccines. etc...

 

 

I imagine there a very few parents who don't allow dating but will be discussing the importance of dental dams with their children. Seriously? Now you're just being offensive.

[stripe]

I mean this in a very respectful way -- I've known and known of people who don't "date" yet have plenty of sex, including with strangers or near strangers, which inevitably has led to some pregnancies, STDs, and so forth. (I find this behavior quite disturbing myself so I'm in no way advocating it.)

 

I think it very important to make several things clear. I went to school with a girl who claimed her mother "made" her date multiple boys so she wouldn't get too serious. Even at the time, I didn't understand how that was much of a precaution, and I found it amusing in a sad sort of way that her mother never considered that her daughter might get too serious with several of the boys.

 

I think it is worth considering that a cloistered same-sex atmosphere could lead to experimentation.

 

Much ground must be covered.

 

Have you read anything by Wendy Shallit? Esp the more recent book. It makes for interesting reading. She has some great insights.

[Lovedtodeath]

I imagine there a very few parents who don't allow dating but will be discussing the importance of dental dams with their children. Seriously? Now you're just being offensive.

Now? :lol:

 

But seriously, with the detailed history and dental dams... I did ask.

[Pink Fairy]

Now? :lol:

 

But seriously, with the detailed history and dental dams... I did ask.

 

Seriously (is there any other way? :D), *I* don't even know what that is, and I'm pretty sure I'd like to keep it that way. :blink:

[kmacnchs]

I don't EVEN want to know what a dental dam is!!!

I think there is something to be said for innocence. I understand what yall are saying about preparing but in my experience, the more I knew, the more I wanted to know (as a teen) and that spells TROUBLE!! (just being honest)

[stripe]

I don't EVEN want to know what a dental dam is!!!

To be fair, a dental dam is a rectangle of latex, intended (originally) to be used in dental work. It's not scandalous in and of itself.

[HRAAB]

We allowed our oldest dd to have a boy friend - visits in each other's homes, he could drive her home from church group, walks around the block. He came from a home very similar to ours as far as values and morals. Guess what? Hormones are alive and well. We will not be encouraging dating for our younger children.

 

Irregardless of what I want, what I teach, what I model, that does not mean it won't happen. Yes, my children will be educated about STD's along with our values and morals. I'll hope and pray for the best along with a lot of supervision, but also with the knowledge that things can still happen.

 

Janet

[Pink Fairy]

To be fair, a dental dam is a rectangle of latex, intended (originally) to be used in dental work. It's not scandalous in and of itself.

 

Interesting. Based on the earlier post I never would have guessed it had such an innocuous use, although I doubt she had dental work in mind.

[Storm Bay]

I've talked a little bit with my 15 yo about STD's and birth control. Not from the standpoint of if you decide to have pre-m sex this is how to protect yourself, but more from the pov of there is a reason God gives us rules and there are consequences for breaking those rules. I don't use scare tactics, but I am pretty open about laying the facts out there. I tell her all the time that God doesn't give us rules to take away our fun and happiness, but to give us true joy and happiness. We've touched on the fact that sometimes consequences occur because of someone else's actions and when that happens it is not the innocent party's fault. I've told her about the Ladies Home Journal poll that found that the women who had the most satisfying s*x life were those who were Christian, married for a long time, and monogamous. My mom told me nothing; I'm trying to do better with my kids.

 

 

This is very close to what I do. One of the most important jobs I think I have as a parent is to teach my dc to learn how to think for themselves and to give them skills to make sound decisions. Dh and I are firm believers in free will, and as our dc get older we move to a more structured parenting type, rather than authoritarian or permissive.

 

I grew up with very liberal Christian parents and was not taught the same standards we're teaching dc. I think it's very important that my dc know what happens in this world at age appropriate times. In fact, knowing about things such as STIs, about the pressures others face, etc, is helpful when I explain to them that I'd prefer them to develop friendships but not to date in hs. If they do have someone special, then supervision. This isn't what our church teaches (but it does teach chastity), but more based on a combination of what I learned being a teen, from teens now and from knowing how the teen brain & hormones are. No matter how you raise a child, a teen's brain is NOT wired the way an adult's brain is.

[Joanne]

Interesting thread. Many of the responders who qualfiy to answer adopt a different parenting paradigm than I do.

 

But the love for their children and God is apparent.

 

I guess I just want to add that a heavy emphasis on supervsion, abstinence and courting does not equal ignorance. And also that a more liberal approach does not mean advocacy of promiscuity, early or accelerated sexuality.

[Nicole M]

Interesting. Based on the earlier post I never would have guessed it had such an innocuous use, although I doubt she had dental work in mind.

 

Are you kidding? I totally thought she did. It's a protective barrier. My dentist doesn't want to contract diseases any more than the rest of us do.

 

Maybe I'm wrong.

[Lovedtodeath]

We allowed our oldest dd to have a boy friend - visits in each other's homes, he could drive her home from church group, walks around the block. He came from a home very similar to ours as far as values and morals. Guess what? Hormones are alive and well. We will not be encouraging dating for our younger children.

Well, of course. They were dating.

 

This is very close to what I do. One of the most important jobs I think I have as a parent is to teach my dc to learn how to think for themselves and to give them skills to make sound decisions. Dh and I are firm believers in free will, and as our dc get older we move to a more structured parenting type, rather than authoritarian or permissive.

 

I grew up with very liberal Christian parents and was not taught the same standards we're teaching dc. I think it's very important that my dc know what happens in this world at age appropriate times. In fact, knowing about things such as STIs, about the pressures others face, etc, is helpful when I explain to them that I'd prefer them to develop friendships but not to date in hs. If they do have someone special, then supervision. This isn't what our church teaches (but it does teach chastity), but more based on a combination of what I learned being a teen, from teens now and from knowing how the teen brain & hormones are. No matter how you raise a child, a teen's brain is NOT wired the way an adult's brain is.

Very reasonable, Karin. I am impressed. I am so glad that I don't have figure all of this out alone. Jehovah's Witnesses publish two books and numerous articles called "Young People Ask" that have all of this type of thing spelled out for us to discuss with our children. This and other threads are really making me realize how blessed I am to have all of this available to me.

 

Are you kidding? I totally thought she did. It's a protective barrier. My dentist doesn't want to contract diseases any more than the rest of us do.

 

Maybe I'm wrong.

Oh... I had another use in mind as well. Maybe my mind is in the gutter. :D

[Pink Fairy]

Are you kidding? I totally thought she did. It's a protective barrier. My dentist doesn't want to contract diseases any more than the rest of us do.

 

Maybe I'm wrong.

 

So in the midst of this conversation you were thinking dental work? I guess it's true that to the pure of heart all things are pure. :001_smile:

[Lovedtodeath]

I googled dental dam. Apparently Wikipedia has a dirty mind too.

[Nicole M]

I stand corrected. Whoo-boy! So corrected!

[Lovedtodeath]

I stand corrected. Whoo-boy! So corrected!

:lol: I clicked on the links! I didn't know Wikipedia had pictures of that sort! :eek: Edited July 18, 2009 by Lovedtodeath

[HRAAB]

Well, of course. They were dating.

 

 

I guess I don't understand what you mean. That hormones were alive because they were dating? Hormones, feelings are still there whether they're dating or not, right? Just that dating brings them out in the forefront, big time?

 

Actually their dating was extremely limited, compared to her friends where boys were picking them up and they were alone for hours. Which just showed us that even limited time together was too much at that age.

 

Anyway, dating is not even on our radar for our younger children while they're in school, but we'll still discuss STD's, etc. Not that can ignore them in this day and age.

 

Janet

[Lovedtodeath]

I guess I don't understand what you mean.

Just a subtle reminder that the OP question was directed to those whose children do not date. Not necessarily directed at you, and probably could have been done in a different fashion.

 

Not that can ignore them in this day and age.

You've got that right!

[HRAAB]

Just a subtle reminder that the OP question was directed to those whose children do not date. Not necessarily directed at you, and probably could have been done in a different fashion.

 

You've got that right!

 

That's fine.

 

Do you really believe that these issues (pre-marital sex and all that goes along with it) will be avoided by not allowing them to date? What about when they've left home, away at college?

 

I'm asking because I'm worried about my children. We thought we were doing things right - not overprotective, but reasonable, and it blew up in our face. So now we get even more rigid, but I also realize there are no guarantees. I sense that some of you are very confident, or at the least fairly confident, that your children will continue to live out your values when they're older. I'm hoping with maturity and more wisdom, that they will make better choices and be able to stand up for themselves. I'm just not overly confident right now.

 

Janet

[Lovedtodeath]

Well Janet, that is a complicated question. If I have trained my children right and they have the heart condition to be humble enough to listen to God, then they will most likely weather moving out without falling prey to fornication. But, they still could...

 

We think that sending a kid away to college is usually unwise.

[Pamela H in Texas]

Janet,

 

Part of the situation is that we don't just teach our kids right but that we help the thinking become their own. If it doesn't, then there may well be issues. But if they can think through things for themselves and be convicted in their hearts, they have a HUGE protection.

 

And I know people get sick of hearing me say it but this is a HUGE reason why we chose to discipline the way we did/do. It is really easy to control most children to a great degree. And many will find punishment a deterance and reward a carrot worth trying for. But when it REALLY counts, our kids need to be able to think, problem solve, have self-control, be self-disciplined. They need to do good things and refrain from bad things for the right reasons. Natural, logical, and punitive consequences are facts of life for the most part, but the goal of training, molding, teaching, guiding should be that those are second, third, fourth on their list of reasonings, back ups that are there, but not what is relied on for control.

 

Anyway, so the goal is for kids to make it their own, not just something they are taught. The jump from head to heart is VERY important. It is their only REAL protection once they are adults and can make their own choices.

[Lovedtodeath]

Part of the situation is that we don't just teach our kids right but that we help the thinking become their own. If it doesn't, then there may well be issues. But if they can think through things for themselves and be convicted in their hearts, they have a HUGE protection.

That is what I meant. :)

 

A girl that I helped raise moved out of her parents house and into fornication the minute she turned 18. Sometimes kids use their free will to go against what they have been taught through no fault of their parents. It is scary.

Edited July 18, 2009 by Lovedtodeath

[Sara R]

Do you really believe that these issues (pre-marital sex and all that goes along with it) will be avoided by not allowing them to date? What about when they've left home, away at college?

 

 

I don't have teens; take this for what it's worth.

 

As I understand it, most kids (girls especially) who believe that premarital sex is wrong, but eventually do it anyway, do it because they fall in love.

 

We hope to be able to persuade our kids to avoid serious relationships until they are mature enough to get married. That way they can avoid a relationship progressing to its natural conclusion before they are mature enough to marry.

 

I don't see this attitude as something you can force, especially after kids leave the house. Teens need to be persuaded over years that what you are trying to teach them is smart, and they choose to accept or reject. A supportive social environment is very helpful though with teens who want to be chaste. A typical college dorm environment (e.g. roommate and boyfriend having sex while you are trying to rest up before exams) is not good.

[Lovedtodeath]

I don't have teens; take this for what it's worth.

 

As I understand it, most kids (girls especially) who believe that premarital sex is wrong, but eventually do it anyway, do it because they fall in love.

 

We hope to be able to persuade our kids to avoid serious relationships until they are mature enough to get married. That way they can avoid a relationship progressing to its natural conclusion before they are mature enough to marry.

 

I don't see this attitude as something you can force, especially after kids leave the house. Teens need to be persuaded over years that what you are trying to teach them is smart, and they choose to accept or reject. A supportive social environment is very helpful though with teens who want to be chaste. A typical college dorm environment (e.g. roommate and boyfriend having sex while you are trying to rest up before exams) is not good.

:iagree:

[Peek a Boo]

There is no such thing as safe sex, or safe anything. It's about being risk aware and minimizing risks.

 

This is exactly what we teach as we cover those topics of STDs and birth "control" options. [and drugs too]

 

Sex is a whole 'nother ball of wax than just "anything," and anyone who thinks otherwise is ignoring a huge piece of history and psychology.

 

It's one thing to minimize risks in our day to day interactions with society at large. It's quite another to put yourself in a situation that can be destructive and carry horrific consequences even if risks are "minimized."

 

So per your OP, no, we do NOT teach "safer" sex. Per your followup, we teach that there IS NO safe sex outside the marriage bed.

And getting married doesn't guarantee your spouse didn't ever sin sexually before marriage: that would be covered under consequences of sex outside the marriage bed.

 

We do educate our young adults about just how dangerous those "safer" options really are, in more ways than one.

 

i think Pamela H stated the training/heart issue very well.

[Sara R]

As I said, I do know that the possibility for kids to mess up is there...but I also totally believe that it's possible for our kids to embrace the teaching we give them about abstinence, and I have that expectation, that faith.

 

Having a bit more knowledge about the other options doesn't take away from the understanding that abstinence is the Biblical route, and the decision to do the "right" thing.

 

I think frank sex ed discussions between parents and children is good. I just don't want the school system doing it. My problem isn't with the knowledge itself, but with the values taught in association with that knowledge. In a public school, you can't teach values about sex the way you can within the family. And I think the values are the most important knowledge. I believe that people are not animals, and that there is a higher purpose to these things. Just teaching the mechanics is not telling the full story.

 

You can't just present the physical details to kids and then tell them, "Only you can decide what's right for you." No! These are children. They aren't going to see the full consequences of their actions. Sex outside of marriage has consequences that reach down multiple generations. Teens aren't going to see those consequences unless you talk about why abstaining until marriage is smart. You help them create an environment where this is possible.

 

The physical details are important to know, if presented in the right way they can reinforce why abstaining is smart. The public schools present those same details in what I believe to be a harmful way: "Abstinence is unrealistic. Everyone is doing it, so you should learn to do it safely." No, everyone isn't doing it! Adults especially need to be supporting those who aren't doing it, because teens sure aren't getting support from their peers!

[chaik76]

We don't have children at dating (or not-dating age) yet. One of the reasons we will discuss various methods of birth control and safer sex is because of such things like rape. No matter how carefully a child is watched and loved and protected, it can happen. And I want my children to know what can happen and how to deal in such situations.

[Pamela H in Texas]

I haven't made it any further yet but something that I almost got back on last night to post is this:

 

I think it is important for parents to realize the significance of the job they have been given. I think it is important for us to do it as closely as God has set out for us. I think it is important (Carmen, my study point this time is 32. LOL) we aim to "train up a child." I think it is important for us to "inculcate" the truth into our children. And the list goes on.....

 

But in the end, an adult child has the responsibility of their choices. We make it easier or harder for them, but THEY are the ones responsible to do it. They must answer the questions Satan has brought up in this world, to please or displease God, to uphold Biblical standards, to treat themselves and others lovingly, etc.

 

Young children's behavior is directly related to what we do and don't do (notice I didn't say 100% dependent because I am quite aware that there are other factors at play). But young adults have options galore. And it is very rare for a child to have not had even a glimpse of other options. They choose and it isn't any longer upon the parent.

 

So for Janet and others, you may have done your job really well. At some point, the kid has to decide his own path. And like I said last night, the great majority come back to some semblance of "normal" and/or "acceptable" even if they seem to lose their mind as a young person.

 

Anyway, we can only offer them the best we can offer them. God made people REALLY resilient. And he can get them through ANYTHING. But they have choices...good and bad :)

[Pamela H in Texas]

Originally Posted by st_claire

There is no such thing as safe sex, or safe anything. It's about being risk aware and minimizing risks.

This is exactly what we teach as we cover those topics of STDs and birth "control" options. [and drugs too]

RIGHT!

[stripe]

I think a realistic discussion of "risk minimization" per health standards sort of sells the benefits of married monogamy all on its own.

 

You have multiple layers of latex, the importance of remembering that a male condom, does allow some skin contact, and there are pesky issues like bugs and mites, the complete lack of symptoms particularly for WOMEN, the fact that several STDs, left untreated, lead to permanent sterility.....1 out of 4 Americans has herpes, which never goes away....

 

It's not romantic, or spontaneous, at all to picturing two fully latexed up partners; it is a ritual of physically manifesting their lack of trust for one another, because you cannot believe someone who says "I'm negative" or assume anyone is.

 

I think the more you paint the picture of what is truly required to "minimize risks," it influences one's choices, if only for health reasons.

[Rhonda in TX]

I don't understand the question about attending movies -- unless teens now are, err, "performing" in movie theatres, with other people present. You can't possible mean that !

 

 

I went to see a movie with some girl friends. As we were leaving, we passed by one of the family bathrooms (the kind a parent can take a child in - single toilet, KWIM?). A teenage boy and girl walked out of the bathroom just as we passed. The boy had a goofy grin on his face. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I know what they were doing in there.

[Tami]

Interesting thread. I haven't read all the responses but we believe that God's design for couples is PURE sex within marriage. We believe in supervision for all ages, especially teenagers, and would encourage but not REQUIRE a courtship model. That will have to be dd's decision. Dating would be chaperoned, if she chooses that.

 

We will teach about STI's just like we teach about any infectious process tranmitted by human contact. We cover human sexuality casually, beginning whenever there were questions. It just seems natural to talk about if you watch Animal Planet or if you have ever bred animals. :D In middle school, we begin the "God's Design for Sex" series and go from there. We will talk about various birth control methods whenever the topic seems needed, and will talk about our family's ethical issues with abortion and early abortion-causing birth control methods. I have not idea when this will be, but certainly by the end of her senior year.

 

In the end, each person must decide what to do with his/her gift of sexuality. As much as we would like to, we cannot decide this for our daughter. If a teen really wants to have sex, they will find a way. We can lead and guide her, and we will be there to love her no matter what happens. It's not something I worry about, but it is an issue that I place in God's hands.

[Pamela H in Texas]

Okay, heads up parents.

 

YES, kids have sex (and do everything but) in movie theaters. They did 20 years ago and they still do today.

 

They also do it on buses.

They also do it in churches.

They also do it on mission trips.

They also do it in the game room upstairs while siblings are nearby.

They also do it while "on a walk."

They also do it at the park.

They also do it on the way back from a football game.

They also do it at school.

They also do it when there doesn't seem to be a moment they could have.

 

A parent is naive and setting themselves up if they think for ONE MOMENT that their kid could not be doing it. It is even more problematic if they don't know it can be done just about anywhere.

 

And by "it" above, I do mean sex but more often the "everything but."

 

Kids do not need to be ALONE to do it. They don't need a lot of time either.

 

Now ideally, this information just isn't something we need more than a cursory knowledge of but....

 

Remember when some idiot posted about a 12yo getting pregnant at a co-op class and that others were having sex there also? The reason the discussion turned the way it did was because a LOT of us know it is a VERY possible situation. Based on what I have seen, I'd actually be surprised if "it" (again, something quite sexual, maybe but not necessarily including intercourse) didn't.

 

Anyway, kids have hormones going wild as teens. They tend to not think things through very thoroughly. They don't understand the real risks involved (and I'm talking more than just disease/pregnancy). And they think it won't happen to them. There is just so much going on. And they fall into believing they are the only ones that aren't doing such things (when in fact, even by 19, 30% still haven't and that number is considerably larger for a 17yo and more so still for a 15 and esp a 13yr old).

 

But moms, be aware, it doesn't take long and it doesn't have to be all that secluded of an area. Some of the most controlled and "protected" teens I have known are the ones that have found the most trouble....

[Sara R]

We don't have children at dating (or not-dating age) yet. One of the reasons we will discuss various methods of birth control and safer sex is because of such things like rape. No matter how carefully a child is watched and loved and protected, it can happen. And I want my children to know what can happen and how to deal in such situations.

 

:001_huh: I'm sure I'm misunderstanding. You don't mean insisting that the rapist use a condom, do you?